Real Talk Diva If the Milk is Free Why Buy The Cow

[Rick6315]

I was looking for the "many faces of beauty" where's it at ? bow wow chickenhead

[Rick6315]

"milk for free" later you wake up next to a cow

[TheEstacia1]

this made me look at my life ,thx

[babbina]

(cont'd) I'm now 7 mths pregnant, the sperm donor bounced, and the ex is back in jail, calling me constantly, begging me to take him back. By then, I woke up, said hell no, because I know that the Lord will send me a man who is truly worthy of me. So Jasmine, I urge u 2 listen to us & keep it moving, 'cuz there is no future with them...

[babbina]

Wow wow wow ladies, thanks, I'm not Jasmine, but I'm sum1 who didn't run away like I should've so I learned the hard way... my ex was a felon, dated him for 4 years, we lived together for most of that time... I went thru all kinds of hell, mostly the overt cheating and the constant lies... Then when we broke up over the summer & I hook up with a guy on the rebound who quickly impregnated me 'cuz he wanted a son w/o a family & I allowed it to happen in my "fed-up" vulnerable state.

[L0veliLadyLumpz]

1B iz my hair color! =]

[memyselfandlifevideo]

Amen sister. Having a baby is more of a commitment than a marriage. He probably want to see how his seed look. Granted he probably is a nice guy, but THAT is totally backwards.

She sounds like a great girl.

[babbina]

luv the comment "he probably wanna see how his seed look" hehe

[NoPillsNoSurgery]

I just watched your vid about wigsplace. That looks great on you. I know your friends with mochalea could you ask her to get in touch with me? Email me or can you do a vid with her wigline. Or at least update us. Thanks

[hazecentbaby]

smh... don't even give this nigga an ultimatum. Just leave. Don't call and warn him. Just pack and leave ASAP (maybe leave a little note behind on the bed or something).

And the ex jailbird... don't ever talk to him again. Just disappear. Don't call or anything. MOVE ON! There are too many men on this planet to be focused on those fools. You're way more important than those boys will ever be.

[lfutrell82]

23 is too young to be married or have kids. jasmine you need to slow down and live your life before you decide to settle down and become wife and mommy. get your education, establish a career, travel...there is so much living to be done. being a single young woman with no kids is one of the best parts of life. take advantage of this time. dont rush into anything.

[tori790]

I think that she should take a step back and be on your own for awhile. Your ex needs to get himself together first before you make a commitment with him. And you need to drop that current boyfriend because all he is going to do is have kids with you, then meet someone else and marry them in 2-6 months. That's what those type of men do. Real talk

[hourglas39]

Jasmine needs to move on. Pack up her stuff and move back home with her parents. Aint no sense of Jasmine wasting her time with this guy, especially if he doesnt want to committ, she needs to dump his ass and kick him to the curb. Being a single parent is hard, she shouldnt do it. Move on, find a good man who will respect you, love you and will want to committ to you and the relationship. And on the X, I would just take it one day at a time and see how things work out.

[vida130]

She needs to leave the past in the past and create a new tomorrow with a new man who is worthy of her!!!! She needs to pick the best man for her future children. My dad is so sweet but his old ass keeps getting locked up like its yearly camp and that is hard on a family esp. the kids.

[Nenendude]

Moving in with him, without at least an engagement, was probably her first mistake. I hope she makes the right decision. I am so tired of men living with women, without getting married to them, it's just wrong. Not to mention the many men who live off the women they live with. Great advice.

[MochaTress]

She needs to bounce. But is the ex boyfriend really a good prospect? Can he provide for her and the three kids with having a criminal record? Don't jump from the frying pan into the fire. Not judging, but keeping it real. The world is not forgiving to brothers with records and often time some have a hard time getting on their feet and doing things lega.

[CYRINTHIA212]

@MochaTress SO TRUE!!!

[SOliloquy890]

how about neither . . . she needs to pick better dudes.

[mrsmummy03]

i agree with everything missmia919 said leave your ex in the past and focus on you, the right man is gonna come along, BUT if u feel u really wanna b with your ex, give it time n let him show you that he's really committed to changing and being there for u, no need to rush into anything

[Sensi937]

Why do we want to buy the pig... when all we get is a little sausage? Those sausages come a dime a dozen...

[missmia919]

I agree with April, pose the question to him. Why aren't you good enough to be married to but good enough to have babies with? Your ex in my opinion needs to remain just that, your ex. You broke up for a reason. Why not concentrate on YOU and making yourself happy? I suggest getting on with your life and leaving the current boyfriend and ex in your past. The right guy is out there for you, you just have to be patient.

[TheLightOfMyWindow]

omg, I LOVE the hair! You look stunning!

:)

[HvnsLilQT]

I thought that was excellent advice Diva. I think she should see what's up with the ex but know that if that's the route she gonna take she needs to expect to be disappointed. Not saying she will be, but she needs to expect it and be prepared for whatever because she might just end up with neither one of them which ain't a bad idea in itself as well.

[Napierbaby1]

nice wig! but i think its a tad too dark for your complexion. and uh duh, dont have his kids if he doesnt want to put a ring on your finger.

[Dsoulchild]

You are very young I would advise for you to find you. Date your ex and others...

[hazecentbaby]

don't date the ex... he doesnt seem to have much to offer. find someone new.

[leereneecee]

WTF! Don't have no niggas kids if he aint going to marry your ass. You tell it like it is girl! I like your wig and it is good to see women still taking out the time to look good for their husband.

[poetree2000]

how about you dump both of them and start fresh!

[pinkplease]

you look beautiful!

[Trampth2260]

These young guys need to have a chance ( TO SEW ROYAL OATS) O>K & if you were loving him more then he love you. I've been married for twleve years 'it's not easy' Make sure you have a solid foundation first ! Give it sometime. I love that hair Diva !

[TheJennycococure]

I think she needs to go to college, get a degree, get her life right FIRST AND FOREMOST. Meet a man who isn't a habitual jailbird OR wants to have kids without marriage. There are some out there, girlfriend. And be truly happy. She's young, she has time. Just do NOT settle.

[hazecentbaby]

best advise ever!

[Synnsational]

what is with that I am 46 been married 2x already, one dead and the other I divorce ok , I'm in a 13yr relationship and he want a baby BUT not get married so hearing this its like what the F**K, he's 56 we too old to start over with babies but the marriage is ok with me, I just dont get it.

[jnellegirl]

I think that Jasmine should leave both men alone. She should find somebody else, find somebody different.

[ccb5000]

do u know if they hava 1/2 wig lik that bc i thought izze was but i was WRONG

[tdavis29]

If I were her I would do just like PUnkin said and leave them both along because one dont want to marry her and the other one wants to and whose to say that he is trustworthy in what he says. She just needs to put it in the Lords hands and concentrate on her and her alone and wait on God to send her the man that she is meant to be with. for when they are locked up they will say shit to make u feel good so they can have a piece on da side when they come home to lay up with.. Just give it time ...

[PunkinLPN]

I would leave them both alone...The BF isn't serious...he just want to play house...The second one might get arrested on your wedding day....He would have to get it together for well over a year before I would even think about being with him...but I would just move on...Life is to short to wait around an play with Mr. Wrong

[leereneecee]

LOL!!!!!

[chrissys31]

I think in her situation she is young and if she really thought about it she needs to finish college or a career an then down the rd have babies and get married? if she does hve strong feelins for the ex jail dude she has to make sure he isnt gonnakeep this jail thing up?! Ol boy that doesnt wanna a commitment he doesnt deserve you really and april is rgh why pay for the cow and he gets the milk free lol i hope jazmine all the luck and to do what her heart n mind tell her to do take care april~

[Thatallqt]

The man coming out of jail should prove himself 1st. Cud go 2 school 2 learn a trade, could be barbering - 2 eventually have his own business or other trades, he has 2 do better 2 remain out of jail, but it will take effort, learning a skill would help. Let him get himself established, then once you SEE him working on himself not 4 u but 4 him so he can be a better person - cuz u cant change him he has to do that for himself...then you can decide. Kids are BIG responsibility. Birth Control plz!

[sherryharrison]

@Thatallqt

[sherryharrison]

I agree prison birson needs to proves his intend! Words aere just words if there's no action!

[babyjulie1984]

I think the actual boyfriend is WAY too young to think of marriage, and so is she. They are only 23, for God's sake. Of course he doesn't want to commit and isn't ready for that kind of responsibility! They should just enjoy their relationship, without any useless, premature pressures like marriage and kids. I think he told her he wanted her to have his kids just to make her understand he IS all about her, but not ready for marriage yet, and she maybe misinterpreted the message.

[embracinmyself]

Now that I think about. I absolutely agree with u. At 23, most people don't even know who they truly are. The person you become at 30 would probably look back at your 23 year old self and say what the hell was I thinking. This girl is rushing things and she will rush homeboy out the door.

[melbeautynails]

wordlife!!!!!diva...no cake for him!!!!!!!

[embracinmyself]

April, I understand that u are married to a person that has been in jail, etc. Why would we as a people encourage a young women of 23 years to form a relationship with a convict. That is a hard ass struggle ahead. What kind of life could they possibly have? Really. Corporate America is not hiring convicts. Some may get jobs but they are menial jobs which usually leads them back to the streets. Jasmine leave both of the men alone.

[nubg2k4]

Everyone deserves a second chance, as long as they have shown signs of change. And corporate America is barely hiring people who haven't been in jail nowadays. I cant tell you how many friends I have that have clean records and Master's degree who are out of work.

Look at all the celebrities who have records and are millionaires. Bill Gates never went to college and look at him. it all depends on the person's drive.

[sherryharrison]

Pie in the sky

[embracinmyself]

Exactly my point. If people with Master degrees cannot get a job. Do you really think they are hiring convicts?? Everyone does deserve a second chance. However, it was said that he has been in and out of jail. You went on to quote Bill Gates, who came from a middle class white family. The criminal system in America is different for blacks and whites. As a black man once you go to jail that stigma will never leave you.

[nubg2k4]

Sometimes you can't help who you fall for.And we don't really know the details of the arrest. Unless he murdered someone or raped someone then that's a no go. Some people can handle situations better than others. It depends on her. But NO relationship is easy. Neither is love.. Like April said, she is young and I think she should take the time to focus on herself first and foremost.

Let a man prove to you he is worthy of YOUR time Jasmine

[babyjulie1984]

I agree with you, embracinmyself. People don't change fundamentally. They may make some adjustments, but if they're damaged goods, there's nothing one can really do about it.

[sherryharrison]

You do have appoint! I would be seriously pissed off if my daughter said she was hooking up with a convict.I would also be furious if she was giving it away with no license!!!

[EDUCATEDCREOLE1]

@embracinmyself Just a thought but you dont have to work in corporate america to be successful!

[butafligq1606]

diva april you always look so pretty! love the hair!

[tushmcgee]

i love this look april ur lookin divalicious as always!

[liberty1211]

i agree with my dive.... kisses

[lovechrissmag]

She needs to drop them both! How long is the ex going to be out of jail this time? Is he determined enough to get a good job after coming out of jail with a record? The BF is a waste of time because, Jasmine, he does not really want you. A man that really wants you will do whatever it takes to be with you. Like April said, he might not be so welcome of a baby when it is actually here. Find you a man that is on the same level & want the same out of a relationship as you do, Diva.

[DutchessCottonPuff]

Excellent advice Diva,,finally someone is saying this to the younger people.. again, i am older than alot here but I wouldnt and DIDNT have a child without being married .Almost 50 now and no way would I have..it is the commitment factor here just like you said .

[passionatereader77]

nice segment diva :)

[sultrydoll]

jasmine this was your wake up call. go home and ask bf like april said you want babies but don't want to wife me? ain't nobody got time for that baby mama/wifey shit. jail dude take it slow feel it out let him show that he can and will do better. your still young.

[AtlantaAngel84]

The bf is so stupid and selfish. He is only thinking of himself. Jasmine needs to leave him, he does not want what she wants. I do not think she should jump back into a relationship with the ex and Jasmine needs birth control 23 is young. April I love these segments, you are very wise.

[krazykittymatt]

U are awesome!!!

[divalizzous]

2 "Jasmine"- Ur in a vulnerable state right now so just b/c ur boyfriend who u love doesn't want to marry u & ur ex is all of a sudden out of prison (4 how long this time?) talking marriage doesn't mean u should dump ur BF. Would u still be worried about it if u hadn't seen ur ex again? My ex went 2 jail 3x when we were 2gether & girl that shit had 2 stop. All I'm saying is there is a reason they're called EX's. But if u really want 2 b married then leave both alone & go find some1 else.

[rmbb10]

I so agree with you; I think Jasmine needs to really consider leaving if he is not willing to make it official and settle down like she wants too. Maybe the ex may have changed and be better now.

[Zinnyster85]

great advice April! I agree with you 100%

[58cocopuff]

You always have good advice

[safiya15]

Once again, great advice April. I totally agree. I would NEVER have a baby with a man who has already told me he doesn't wanna get married, but its cool if we fool around and have children. I don't think so. Its true that all marriages don't work out, but at the same time, its a responsibility just like having children are, so why want one without the other? Doesn't make sense to me.

[Barginjunkie69]

luv the hair !!!

[tinycubone]

girll that hair i bangin

[SweetVirginiaNatural]

I wish more mothers gave their daughters this essential piece of advice. You said it right, if a man considers you good enough to screw and knock-up, but NOT good enough to marry and commit to, then why would you even continue to date him? It's the ultimate form of disrespect. Black women ARE "wife material", but once you have several out-of-wedlock kids by several different men, it only gets that much harder getting a guy to "put a ring on it".

[MiSzJaCkiiE427]

Heyy divvaa... Well I say jasmine needs to follow her heart and do wat she thinks is write ... She should definetly try thinks out wit her ex..who knows he could be exactly wat she needs but don't marry him right away just try it out for a little after that you'll know wat to do

[Takia86]

Good advice!

[Rpaige917]

I agree April. My personal saying is "I would prefer to possibly try and fail then always wonder what would have happened".......

[msfvsu]

Great advice...

[nubg2k4]

If a man truly loves and respects you, he will want to have THE life with you. Many men have babies w. women and then move on to the woman they really want. We have to be smarter ladies

I can't stress this enough. Never ever play house with a man that hasn't committed to you... he will get comfortable in that lifestyle and you will never get married.

We women need to expect more for ourselves.

[durae2003]

thats right.

[Ateyaaa]

U KNOW U TELL IT STRAIGHT...MY GIRL!

[1lilgirlbaby5]

wow sounds exactly like my story

[houstonempress86]

i agree! 100% great advice i also suggest u go on a serious sex strike from current bf too

[reserectcc]

- agreed

[BabyTigga23]

Speak it April that was so true!

[ilovejayceon]

...doesnt want marriage but no marriage...noooooooooooooooooo­ooooooo way. WARNING SIGN #1

[tanialovinghair]

good advice love you diva

[durae2003]

Ex's are x's not y's. Don't go back there at all. As far as the guy you're with, don't give him an ultimatum, but let him know that you are not gonna stick around and wait for him to do what he is supposed to do. Do not have a child before getting a ring on your finger. My grandma said if a man can get papers on a dog he can get papers on me.

[Hersheykiss32389]

PREACH!

[babbina]

dang girl yr grandma told the truth, i need to keep that word close to my heart...

[Hersheykiss32389]

great advice DIVA... she should deff do her pros and cons... im just wondering why her ex-boyfrined is the ex in the 1st place... if its just cause of jail then she should give him another chance but if its more than that... better re-think it girl!

[CoCo8053]

I say she should see what her ex is really on and not just on some jail talk. N don't have no babies by ol dude now that's some b/s wanting to have a freakin baby by her but no ring.. What is u serious.. Ur worth more than that. He just don't realize it yet... I bet if he know yo ex was back in the pic he will turn all that around...lol..like april said sit back and weigh ur options and look at the bigger pic.. then go from there.. b/c like LOREAL say UR WORTH IT...lol good luck girly

[mamamorgan0905]

i also think that children are def less of a commitment than marriage is. her current boyfriend needs to evaluate the consequences of having a child v.s. taking a spouse. and i agree that she should give her ex a chance; but she should just wait it out. if he still feels the same way in a couple of months, then she should give him a chance.

[17snaxaday]

great advice as always

[MrandMrsT]

This was a hot topic last month on a chat board that I frequent ....men who want to have babies but no wedding. The world has definitely changed when people feel that marriage is more of a commitment than a child. Then again, some men leave their wives/girlfriend along with the kids as if they never existed once the relationship is over. I suspect that men who feel that kids are less of a commitement are the type that would walk away from their kids if the relationship ends.