Ex-Gay Therapy Stunted My Creative Growth

[romperstompist]

Lol justin chillin needs condoms and to learn about adoption what a douche

[indvine8]

I tried so hard to not be gay that I lost everything that I was including the good in my personality. I tried not to be ruled by my attraction to men. I knew people would try to change me so I hardly told anyone about my struggles. Through prayer I discovered that God wanted me to continue singing in my high voice and being aesthetically creative. Now i'm somewhat asexual, still hanging on. I'm just not letting go of Jesus because his holy spirit has given me much comfort, love and peace.

[eurogal100]

I am so sorry that this counselor did this to you! But I am so glad you have returned to performing! That is horrible that you were driven from what you love. It is a real shame that there is so much gender stereotyping when it comes to the arts. The perception that singing a tenor part is "gay" also means a lot of straight guys fear to join the choir for fear of being labeled. It's the reason why amateur choirs are short on men!

[MICKEYMIN2]

A Real Man is one of courage, honor, integrity, compassion for his fellows, humility and perseverance. IMO you stand very tall and strong; exhibiting an extraordinary amount of passion in seeking the value of your struggles in that they may benefit others. By your willingness to share your experiences (and by the total number of views) I am positive that you certainly have helped others, perhaps unknowingly saving lives. Now that's a MAN !! Thanks much

[unevraiejade]

Wow! I really like this video and what you say in it. I agree with you on the point that people mix up sexual orientation and gender and I am so sad that some people in the comments section took this as gay propaganda. *Sigh!*

Plus, there is absolutely no direct connection between your voice range and your sexual orientation or gender! I am a lesbian and sing soprano and, hopefully, I never had a bad experience like you had, even if I have sung either in "straight" or "gay" vocal ensembles.

[Deusarmos]

Gosh! Your case is terrible! So sorry for you. Did you or will you try to sue them? It will make sense: (1)you'll be reimbursed because of all the horrible consequences you told were caused by their fckng stupid therapies, and (2) the awareness will arise, and could be you'll help guys like you not to be trapped like you were.

BTW, I'm tenor as well, and I am not complaining on my gay orientation:)

[hurleyGRANDE]

Why did you agree to any of this?!

[TrinidadAdventistGay]

What?!!!!

Tenor to bass?!!!!

This is rank stupidity. Wow!

[ayucatATONOMIplasma1]

whow your adorabal

[justinchillin76]

what kind of performing artist are you? I'm trumpeter --iii=O

Justin

[justinchillin76]

sounds like gay propaganda. I have no attraction and I am 32 and homosexuality has given me the wonderful experience of an std...a dead boyfriend who decided to take his own life with me in the car and being 32 with no kids.

You live that life style you will only know pain

[tenorcervantes]

i am very sorry about your loss and the unfortunate negative experiences you have had. i remember when i felt that homosexuality was so sinful and shameful that i too had planned to take my own life. but what changed for me was a new understanding of what it means to love someone and how it is that love someone. i see sexuality as a gift regardless of one's sexual orientation--a gift that shouldn't be taken light or regarded with disdain. But at the same time, a gift that should be praised.

[rpgboy22]

Sorry you've gone through so much, Justinchillin, but what you're saying would be no different than someone saying that heterosexuality gave them the wonderful experience of an STD and having a girlfriend who killed herself and being 32 with no kids. They couldn't blame their sexuality for that any more than you can blame yours. STDs come from unsafe sex. Suicides come from drugs/alcohol and not dealing with depression and suicidal ideation. Not having kids is dealt with through adoption.

[holocaustik]

heterosexuality can give you the same wonderful experience.

[spartacandream]

@holocaustik Not for gays. When I see a girl, sex isn't even the last thing on my mind. When I see a cute guy, there's a pretty good chance I'll be crushing on him, though I won't say it. Both are great I'm sure, but I only know homosexuality, and am incapable of heterosexuality. Trust me, I tried. I had a girlfriend to try to become straight, but it went nowhere. As soon as sex came into the picture, I tried for the sake of becoming straight, and yeah.....let's just say, epic fail on my part.

[TrinidadAdventistGay]

justinchillin76,

Are you now attracted to women as much as you were attracted to men?

[conscious4]

@justinchillin76

its not because you had a bad experience that all gay people will too, you cannot jugde everybody lives based on some bad things that happened to you

the boyfriend might have taken his life due to homophobic people in society, to the hate to gay people, your suffering his due to hate from homophobia, and doesn't not relate to being gay

you obviously should consult a psychologist because you cannot think clearly, you are confused

grow up, learn to think like an adult!

[Reqrezentin]

Are you a homo? Because you are acting like one. What you need to do is simple. Stop shaking your head like that when you speak. It is the a fundemental part of being a homo.

[tenorcervantes]

I am out as openly gay. But nonetheless, people's behavioral mannerisms are not always directly associated with their sexual orientation. The fundamental part of being homosexual is having same-sex attractions, not how one moves their head.

[Reqrezentin]

But it is weird. Dick against dick? It is suppose to go somewhere. For example if we were all gay (God forbid so) then how would we makee another generation?

[tenorcervantes]

That's the beauty of creation though, the fact that there is diversity in sexuality. Clearly everyone isn't gay and everyone isn't straight. Not everyone is meant to produce offspring, in fact there are many straight couples that don't have kids and many that never plan too. Relationships are based on far more than just procreation.

[Reqrezentin]

Interesting view. So you are basically saying : Screw life we are getting funky with it...... Interesting.

[tenorcervantes]

That's definitely not what I'm saying. I am shedding light on the fact that creation isn't something to be taken lightly or regarded with disdain; there is obvious diversity in creation, if there wasn't then we would have races, genders, and even different sexual orientations. In no way does homosexuality distort the image of human creation, instead it's evidence to how each and everyone of us were made differently and posses different things that make us all unique

[Jacksonholenativ]

RIGHT ON!!!

[Jacksonholenativ]

WTF?  Get a brain.

[Reqrezentin]

What?

[Deusarmos]

@tenorcervantes Loved your wise comment! That's true, man! I'm ok with being gay.

[Jacksonholenativ]

THERE ARE TOO DAMNED MANY PEOPLE ON THIS PLANET!!! PERIOD!! We have 6 Billion plus people on this planet. How many more do we need to push other species of creatures to the brink of extinction? Second homosexuality appears in virtually every mammal as a sexual orientation minority. You don't have to worry about homosexuality being universal because it never has been and it is highly unlikely that it ever will be universal so humans will continue to overpopulate this fragile planet.

[spartacandream]

@Reqrezentin It is weird, as is all sexuality, even heterosexuality. Thats what makes it great!

[Jacksonholenativ]

Are you an asshole Reqrezentin because when you post making statements like this it sure shows you to be one.

[Deusarmos]

@Reqrezentin LOLs!

[wtffshelby]

I hope you are not still going to gay therapy. I hope today you are yourself and comfortable with it. If you are gay it is ok. You are beautiful whoever you are. You are a man. :)

[Eldanen]

I understand exactly what you mean.

[ianmcandrewmusic]

This was a horrible story... I know several opera singers and they're almost all straight - in fact, I'd say the 10% rule works in this profession as in any other... Sexual orientation is totally unrelated to talents or skills.

[theknightswhosay]

I was into sports and fairly butch, and I thought that meant I couldn't really be gay for a while. It's funny that you found a rationale for not being gay even though (not to be judgmental) you're clearly not.

There's nothing more manly than being who you are though, that's the important thing.

[alyzhon]

such a gorgeous guy and obviously highly intelligent and very pronounced :)

message me if you want to have an intelligent chat, hopefully you're roughly my age, 20 lol.

take care, well done x

[bimboblacky]

I am SO glad I was able 2 make it clear 2 my own family that this "reparative" therapy would B *pointless* in my own case, and over time I was able 2 present testimonies JUST LIKE THIS to Mom in particular. Okay, THAT B-ing said, a few key names from human history:

Peter Ilyich Tschaikowsky; Sir Reginald Dwight (Elton John); Michelangelo; Maestro Leonardo da Vinci; and CURVE ball here...Alan Matheson Turing (look him up...LEFT-brained GENIUS).Don't give up your dreams, bro'. GOD inspired them.

[Azariahisastar]

I must agree. Misconceptions. I can be a manly man and ware a pink boa...

[marty1160]

Boy you need to be true to yourself first and formost. you will always be who you are inside

no mater what people think or tell you how to act. I wish somuch the best for you. take care, Marty

[mikey2653]

you are still gay and just hiding in the closet..How shameful to quit performing arts.You will one day come back out and be a big queen..your gayyyyy

[tenorcervantes]

i came out of the closet two years ago.  i'm very comfortable with my sexuality orientation. i've reconciled my faith and identity as a gay man. this blog was to share the experiences i had while i was part of ex-gay ministries. however, i wouldn't consider myself a "big queen," that's only contributing to the misconceptions people have about gay men.

[mikey2653]

Hello, Did you know the first time i saw you i cried? You are so beautiful! I would just like to be your friend and talk to you about my problems and maybe you can help me..Please say yes...

[Deusarmos]

@mikey2653 Loved your comment:)

[ronwilliams753]

Now that you have freed yourself from these crazy people I hope that you will go back to your passions of singing and the stage. I know from your campaigning activities that you are strong enough to be yourself, and you are a brave young man to share this with us. Your are who you are - and be proud of it.

[missdivinestalls]

It's so brave of you to share this stuff with us. Kudos to you!

[quarterduce]

"Reparative therapy" is just a fancy phrase for abuse.

[Deusarmos]

@quarterduce Though, not always, but here it's just BINGO!

[stanley1963261]

I wish you would come out with more material because I absolutely love what it is that you do.You are a bright light in the world. It is so scary that people think that they can condition you to change your god given nature. You must come into contact with your inner strengths or gifts given to you by God himself and immerse yourself once again in them.You are a healer by the example of your struggle to be a unique being as God intended

[donutouch]

Amazing video.

Destroying people's dreams is inhumane.

"Hold fast to your dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly.

=)