Miscarriage - How To Deal With Loss, What Helped/Helps Me, Advice, Ideas & Honesty

[luckyvan2]

i had a miscarrage on January 9,2011 and i still cry about it.I dont know how to get over it,i feel so lost inside.I was 2 months along.It was the most painful thing ive ever bern tbrough yet.

[Leahfan310]

Thank you, this helped me alot. I recently experienced a miscarriage. Unfortunately for me I had no one by my side through the pain. My parents weren't even aware I was pregnant. My baby's father has no clue and will most likely never find out either. I blame it all on myself and the stress and emotional pain I was in at the time and that's why no one can know. But this video helps me think that maybe there's hope. My baby girl would have been born this April. But I know she's now looking over

[armywifey91]

Wow. Extreme! Why would you want to have a miscarriage ... that's horrible! You need to go to hell.

[amberspry86]

i have had two miscarriages and im still scared from it,and it has to been 2 years from now.this is a great way to help.i have never done this and prouble cant.i have kept this away from everyone cause i got bad feed back from it and my husband just didnt want to hear about it.it seemed like to me.i have not been able to get pregnant since then.im afrade that i will never beable to have a family.thanks to anyone that post these videos.

[sylviakitty222]

Thank you for your video. I found out yesterday after having my first ultra sound that my baby/or fetus, I'm so confused as to what is really going on, had no heartbeat. The ultrasound Tech said there was no baby....just and empty yolk sac (if I"m pronouncing that or spelling that correctly. Devastated is not even close to the amount of suffering I feel 24 hours a day now. So depressed I can hardly function. I'm 38 and this was my first pregnancy. I hurt. I can't really even move.

[ZebraCupcake1280]

I had a stillborn 3days later my sister got married i know how hard it is

[AdRamirez0919]

My baby heart stopped beating at 11 weeks but we didn't discover there was no heart beat until I was 13 weeks. I was devastated and still am, it's only been 2 months. I feel lost & empty inside, I feel like when they took my baby out they took my soul too! I had to have a DC cuz my body just didn't get the fact that the baby wasn't alive anymore. I'm hurting -- & sometimes I feel no one understands that! Thanks you for making this video!

[Kissezgee08]

I could ay I kno exactly how you feel I lost my baby boy when I was 6 months prego an this happened 02022010 last year yes it hurt to lose him when I seen no heart beat on my ultrasound but it hurt more the day me an my bf had a funeral for him.. but they said they found why but til this day I still haven't tried to concieve because I'm scared it could happen again.. but we are planning to try agan sometime this year an I'm sorry gurl..

[donellexrachelle]

I just recently had a miscarriage and me and my boyfriend tried for that baby, and it hurts so bad, it feels like something has been takin from me. I will go somewhere that I had just been to a week ago and think, "i was pregnant last time I was there". Im so anxious to try again.

[MScolourMEbeautiful]

thank you for this video,it helped me.x

[catherineejsteffen]

Thank you thank you thank you ... it has been over two months since I lost my 6 week bean... and I'm also one who has had to struggle with anger and such. So... just thanks.

[gunxgirl]

Thank you so much for posting this very personal video. I saw this after watching your other video from when you first discovered your miscarriage. I recently miscarried this past weekend and even at just 6 wks, this has been incredibly devastating. I really appreciate you sharing your thoughts about this-- it makes me feel less alone. Unless they have gone through it too, most people don't understand. Thank you again for your helpful and sympathetic video...

[erubio070707]

Thank you . Im still learning how to deal with my new life. I told my husband Im differant because of our loss. I find friday's to be the hardest cause thats when i would trun another week. Im not taking care of myslef I don't get dress anymore I don't even want to leave the house. I feel bad cause i wish i can be my old slef but i just not ready . I kept one baby blanket that i can't part with i tell every one it's mine at night i put it under my pillow. when i see it i now i would never c baby

[mejiafagg2]

Hello thanks for the video i have a friend that just lost her baby she was like 15 weeks and she really wanted to have a baby and she seemed so exited to have a child and then all of a sudden she lost it due to an infection and so she is blaming herself and she says she doesnt know what to do anymore and so all i can do as a friend is to comfort her as much as i can but she just so depressed more than ever so my question is how can i help her in a better way ..?

[natsjourney77]

Love your vids! I subscribed! I totally understand how you feel! I had a missed miscarriage and had to wait 3 weeks for answers...wondering if the baby had died, and finally at 8 weeks I had a D&C. It was horrible! I completely agree with everything you said. I did a lot of similar things in my grieving process. It's been 5 months since then and we've just started TTCing again. I pray for the best, I know I'll be so scared! Just started a Vlog of my own!

[Nonopaws0323]

you have really helped me grief even though i lost my son to stillborn it helps you were the first person i watched on youube and i find my self going back and watching you i also am going to do ttc videos cause we are trying again and i named my baby as well ( michael jay stone JR) after his father thank you so so much

[CarlyMarieDudley]

Thank you.

[neferteri05]

By the way, congratulations on your birth. I wish you and yours all the best.

[neferteri05]

I had a miscarriage last week. I had the bleeding and cramping etc for several days beforehand. I've really appreciated your videos and think you've given great advice. I've also had several people make rude comments to me and given me bad advice which stinks. Our baby, Jayden Makayla will sorely be missed. I do have something I would like to add. Tomorrow, my family and I are going to write notes on balloons and release them to the Heavens as a final goodbye.

[rachelloneyhowes]

thank you so much for sharing your story.

[xxmamachrisxx]

i think your an amazing lady for doing this and your other video

[anglong1]

It's been two months since we lost our baby. We had passed our 12 wk "safe" period so it came as a bit of a shock. The ultrasound showed that our baby had died 2 weeks before. I think the reality of it has only really hit me today. It makes other people more confortable to see that I'm doing "fine" so I carry on although I'm aching inside. I agree that grief is a lonely place.

Congratulation on the birth of your son. TTC again and hoping for a healthy baby also.

x

[ellencha]

regarding the hurtful things people say: i have a list of them! but i just try to remember that these people love me, and are just trying to make sense of the death of a baby--for me, but also for themselves. and unless you've gone through losing a baby, it's hard to know what to say to comfort that mama. i have found the most helpful words are simply "i am so sorry."

[ellencha]

thank you for taking the time to make this video.  we lost our son at about 16 weeks gestation last month. yes, holding him and naming him (merce christopher) really helped. these words have also soothed my hurting heart:

Be still, my soul: the hour is hastening on

when we shall be forever with the Lord,

when disappointment, grief, and fear are gone,

sorrow forgot, love's purest joys restored.

Be still, my soul: when change and tears are past,

all safe and blessed we shall meet at last.

[hippylongstockings]

as my fiance flew back to usa to finish up stuff i went fo rmy first scan and was told our lil one had died at 7 weeks..i was 12 weeks along...i had to go through it all alone..this was back in aug and im still finding it so hard...thinking how far along i should be now..and also my daughter is pregnant again im trying to be there for her but its so hard..our babies would of been within weeks of each other...

much love to all the ladies who have lost

[drpjjl]

Ive very recently miscarried myself and I have to say that i havent come to terms with it at all....i still forget that im no longer pregnant. This video is very inspirational. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

[Racheous]

@drpjjl I'm so sorry. Thinking of you xxx

[extreme5050]

@drpjjl Does anyone of you have a video tutorial about how to miscarry? I cant find any and I really need to

[babyphatgurlee]

thank you so so so much for this video. You helped alot.

[4323423]

I recently lost a baby. We went for an ultrasound after I had some bleeding and found that our precious baby had already passed a couple of weeks earlier. It has been so hard and my doctor has not been helpful or empathetic. Thank you so much for your videos. It is so nice to know that there are others out there who understand how traumatic a miscarriage truly is. May God watch over you and your family.

[bigrd200]

ive been hesitant to talk about our young one that moved onto heavon but in this video you said i should talk about it so thank you its still hard but it helps

[AmberMS1204]

When one of my friends came to me after having one I clearly didn't know what she was going through and I was her shoulder to cry on. Then when it happened to me I knew exactly how devastated she was. I've been staying strong, and I finally let my family know, who was very supportive btw. As of now, I plan on waiting about a year then see if I'm ready to try again. I def agree with your video I acted the same way.

[Racheous]

I'm so sorry for your loss, thank you for watching xxx

[hannahmetcher]

This video sums up my experience exactly, and i completely understand how it feels to just crumble sometimes. thankyou so much for sharing, it means alot!

[Racheous]

Thank you so much for watching and I'm sorry that you've felt something similar to me - it's not fair.

[edaj84]

I found that I had 3 different responses to 3 miscarriages.

1. (age 16, 8 weeks) was SOOO happy. I was made to feel very guilty for this emotion but I still feel that way in a lot of ways

2.(age 17, 15 weeks) devastated, crushed, confused, angry, guilty

(2 children born in this time)

3.(aged 24, 10 weeks, didn't know I was pregnant) shock at finding out I WAS pregnant, a few days later reality sunk in, pain, anger at the world, anger at my body for failing me, guilt, sadness, frustration

[Racheous]

Thank you for sharing that.

[edaj84]

no problems, I just thought it might be relevant to show that even one person can feel drastically different things at different times depending on circumstances, readiness etc

[Racheous]

Definitely important :)

[edaj84]

I actually liked the language, I think it expressed very very well how I felt. It fucking sucked!!!

I enjoyed this video and found that a lot of the same things helped me.

and as for the insensitive comments...yeah well, all those dumb comments and the people saying them can go shove it!

[Racheous]

Thanks hun. It is how I felt, I just try not to curse! :P Thank you for watching and agreeing. So sorry that you can agree xxx

[butterflysweetie09]

i havent misscarried or anything i just came across this vodeo and i want you to know that i am deeply sorry for your loss.

you are so strong.

[Racheous]

Thank you for your kind words and for watching.

[feelinlucky51]

wow. i can't even imagine the feelings and grief you went through. thank you for sharing your story.

[Racheous]

Thank you for watching :)

[spilleddaisy]

you are sooo brave, i love your blogs, keep it up. People don't talk about miscarraige and it is one of the most common things that occur. Thanks for speaking up!

[Racheous]

Thank you for watching. I agree, miscarriage needs a voice. Take care xxx

[Linz916]

I'm with jamaicanmehappy..you scared the crap outta me when I read the title!! Then I saw the date and remembered its been a year! Glad you are doing well! :) Your little one will be here before you know it!!!!

[Racheous]

I didn't even think. However, if I were to lose this baby it wouldn't be a miscarriage - I'm 26 weeks! Thank you for watching hun :)

[Racheous]

Thank you so much xxx

[Shellsibelle]

I can't believe it's been a year, but at the same time so much has happened since. RIP Ollie, watch over your Mummy, Daddy and baby brother xox Hope you're doing ok today Rach xox.

[Racheous]

It's crazy isn't it? I can't believe it's been a whole year either! Thank you hun, I know he's guiding us and feels our love xxx

[rml3407]

youre an awesome woman for telling everyone how you went through your miscarriage....i remember your video when you were having it..I think we all cried with you..I went through mine when I was 12 weeks.....it hurts still!!!! But-good luck to you-and thanks for sharing with all of us...

[Racheous]

Thank you so much for watching. I'm so sorry for your loss and understand how the pain doesn't stop - it just changes and you learn different ways to cope. Take care xxx

[sassyferu]

Thank u so much for the video i lost 2 babies! The 2nd one would have been due this Friday ! I have been blaming myself for it and i have been going to therapy to talk to someone about it! Thanx again hun for the video!

[Racheous]

Thank you for watching. I'm so very sorry for your losses and am so glad that you're getting help. No Mum should blame herself but I know that feeling and I'm thinking of you <3

[candi2082]

Thank you so much for this video, i lost my baby last year on november 1st 2008 and the feeling of losing a baby is hard. i pray god bless me to be a mother. Am so happy for you god bless!!!

[Racheous]

Thank you sweetheart. I'm so sorry for your loss and pray that you're blessed again sooner than you think <3

[candi2082]

Thank you for those ,words god bless!!!!

[Racheous]

Thank you for watching :)

[somberangel13]

Thanks for sharing.. Today makes 3 months that I lost my baby as well..Its a very hard thing to deal with..

[Racheous]

I'm so sorry for your loss :( Thank you for watching and I hope that my words helped you in some way. Take care xxx

[jamaicanmehappy]

girl you scared the crap out of me when i read your title. my heart started to beat so fast. im happy every thing is going well w/ this pregnancy. yhx for this vid ...still today 2yrs and a daughter later i still grieve after the loss of my daughter.

[Racheous]

Oh I'm sorry! AUGH! I didn't think of that. I am so happy too. It is always difficult isn't it? *hugs*

[MandyCandy66]

Thank you so much for sharing your heart with all of us! turning your pain into healing words for someone else is really angles work! You will and have made a difference in peoples life for what you share! Thank you!

[Racheous]

Thank you hun xxx I really want to help <3

[glorifying00]

i think its like what they say about alcoholics.. once one always one... with my MC it will always be there.. i will never be totally over it!

do you think having/being pregnant again helped?

thanks for the honesty, its been 5months and i am still suffering, and pretending that i am ok i don't no what else to do-- any tips?

[Racheous]

I will PM you and will answer this question in another video at a later date.

[mrsjerriq]

Thank you for this video!! i feel the same way even though i miscarried at 7 wks that was our child and even though we will never know the sex of our baby he or she is our angel and we (me & hubby) know that he or she is in the arms of our Lord until we meet .. it is very hard to say "goodbye" before u say "hello" you are such amazing woman!! and very strong! thank u !

[Racheous]

Thank you for sharing, I'm so sorry for your loss xxx

[aesweety19]

It was hard to still be a good friend to the girl that continued her pregnancy.... asking how she was doing, letting her gush and be excited about baby and fixing up her nursery. It's hard to not let myself crumble in jealousy sometimes. For me what helped most was talking to Neil, my mom, my friend that miscarried, and God. Also what helped (still is helping) A LOT was/is watching your videos, seeing how things could end up, that a family could still be in the cards for us =)

[Racheous]

God certainly helps. Never give up hope hun, it will happen & it'll be magical <3

[aesweety19]

A lot of what you said was spot on for me. Luckily I have a husband who left me grieve in my own way...who let me randomly start crying in the middle of dinner after I'd just been laughing only a second ago. He'd just hold me, tell me it was okay. I did and still do try not to be jealous of my friends. My two best friends and I all got pregnant around the same time. My one friend miscarried the day before me, had the d&c and is now pregnant again.....

[Racheous]

I was and still am so lucky with my husband too. My sister fell pregnant the month I miscarried so I can relate to that difficulty as I felt it for a while. Thank you for sharing xxx

[Phentie]

Thank you! You know what helped me as well was to write a hand written journal, that I want to give our next child we'll be trying to have again, in the future. You really made my day making this video, it made me know that i am not alone. I know I am not alone, but hearing the words come from your mouth, made me remember that. Rachel, I appreciate your videos more then you know! Thinking of you too, and your husband, and of course Baby Oliver! xxxx

[Racheous]

That's such a great idea *hugs*

[Phentie]

I love your videos, .Rachel!!!

I had a good cry watching this... I send you lots of love and lots of hugs on your painful day! Rest in peace, Oliver :-( xxxx

[Racheous]

I'm so glad I can make some small difference, much love to you. Crying it out can be so good. Thinking of you xxx