Joshu2uber- My First Standup Video (Original)

[aherrin11]

this is actually so bad

[randompro100]

is this dumbfuck serious? hes so stupidly funny, i pissed myself!

[Rattchett1]

Y improve wen u could just GTFO utube

[gorillaz220]

I nearly died laughing.

[hejsantxu]

why do stand up amatures always Laugh at their own jokes xD

[KyleTheLamma]

Is he a troll? I'm not sure if I should have an erection or not...

[TheReaperBrandon]

0:36 TROLL FACE!

[dmantz36]

im hammered drunk, my girl just left me and i am thinking that is the thing i will kill myself for

[doulikebalieys]

Painful

[UndertakerU2ber]

Pedo-bear is after this kid...

[MyWeirdCousin]

Yea I dare you to go tell Pedro the guy who makes the food on the airplane that and he will have people driving by your house shooting you. Just saying....

[W1llpow3r2]

OMG YOUR SO FUNNY

jk, I don't like you.

I know your just trolling everybody anyway

[milkweed2000]

why doese he sound like the nerdy ppl who use big words and try to act kool afterwards

[lNukaquartzl]

Whats the deal with airports, there huge, you know?

.....

What?

[shadowfiend97]

i love how you get your jokes off of the internet, at least copy the joke that are funny....stand up my ass....how bout you just sit down and and dont talk.

[BlueBrickStudio]

@wildirish998 id rather laugh at paper...

[nextgentacos123]

In Russia, Funny isn't you.

[nikko8P]

Homo.

[smfdxsmfd]

yeh my skeet

[Therobotofdestiny]

your not supposed to laugh at your own jokes

[TheSalamenceFan]

Those jokes made me cry. :'( That's how bad they are.

[FunnyFlirtTalks]

Fetty

[magustx]

trolololololololololololololol­olololololololololololololol

[TheLundey]

to improve you need to grab a gun point it right at your head and SHOOT! trust me it will help you

[mexicanplayer95]

@TheLundey that was a bit too harsh

[volcom1722]

wow, "whats the deal with airports? I mean they're so huge" and he starts cracking up. Anyone notice he's clicking and reading off a computer perhaps? Tip, standup comedians cant use computers.

[Salieri1760]

Goddamn I wanna punch him in the tits

[Atlantis0723]

Oh ya and to improve your standup STOP DOING IT U SUCK

[Atlantis0723]

this kid likes to get screwed in the ass by kim jong ill with his small cock

[ArnoldTheHamster]

What the fuck is a public toilet supposed to smell like? Flowers?

[feelinthenugz]

when did the joke start?

[MrSnake9419]

trollbaiting retards

[auggiej1]

my asshole is funnier than him. i could shit out a top notch act in a day!!!!

[violentD3]

Way to improve standup: Never do it again

[timesplitter2512]

my face throughout video- >:/

[tyranidzftw]

this is a shite standup ma cats funnier than you ..........even though my cat is really funny sorry tia

[randyjr81]

whats the deal with this lame ass kid????? I herd better jokes come from william hung.....SHE BANG SHE BANG!!!!!

[bakufrend]

daxflame is funnier than josh

[ReGREVOLVER]

Dude just for the record you suck. and....go kill yourself

[CKO92]

Fun fact: North Korean secret police agents use this video to extract confessions from political prisoners.

[jmvillaluz]

To improve youer stand up is to stop

[XxCaM3RONZxX]

that video could be classed as tourture and just to say to evry one im better becuase i live in the uk and the sun never comes out and it rains 24/7 lol

[XxCaM3RONZxX]

that video cold be classed as tourture and just to say to evry one im better becuase i live in the uk and the sun never comes out and it rains 24/7 lol

[vgcat123]

I think by making you stand up better for you and everyone is to stop all together please it is painful

[backstabbath127]

Was "What's the deal with airports. They're so huge you know?" a joke or a statement?

[DethAlien]

*facenuke*

[xXSamPlummerXx]

I know how he could improve... he could shut up.

[uniquemindable]

this is funny because its not;L

[waffle314]

You don't need to improve. You are already funnier than Dane Cook!

ZING!!!!!!!!!!!

[dirtbikeredden]

Here's how you can use improve on your stand up, Vaule. But you can't use sense YOU HAVE NONE!!!!!!!!!!!

[MarioFanLevelz]

@wildirish998 hell yeah xDDD

[TheLangsta99]

isnt this kid pretending to be like 6 different people on the internet lol

[kratosgranola1]

"i'm better than you because i...um...anyway,"

FAIL.

[MathiasRodrigIsCool]

Quick, Josh! GET LORNE MICHAELS ON THE PHONE!

[Xsdeaf1]

how to improve your stand up: dont use the internet. ha

[aFinnsTheory]

How to improve your standup?

Hmmmmmm....

First of all: DON'T!

Your stand-up is so horrible that you can't even actually stand up, fatty! Way to go, Josh! Make some gay stand-up jokes while surfing through the internet and living off of hot pockets! FUCK, YOU, FIDO.

[jackneeley10]

ha-haa-ha-haters ta-ta-ta-ta-taday junior!

[akguitar94]

justin beiber and 2 of his friends were sitting at a bar

his first friend said he has the biggest arm in the world

his 2nd friend says he has the biggest leg in the world

justin says he has the smallest dick in the world

they all go to the world record people

the 1st guy comes out, and he was right

the second guy somes out and he was right

justin comes out and says "who the fuck in joshu2uber"

[ZapperBrain]

Wait....he's telling jokes?

[TheHorrorCompany]

you could improve your stand-up by STOPPING!

[videogames73]

im gana leave my shoe up his ass, even if hes a canable troll, i dont fucking care

[jordyswanboii]

come on..... he is taking the piss hes a shite troll

[Wuuzex]

@wildirish998 A dinner in a Amish Family is funnier than this guy xD

[rblackrabbit916]

you can prove your stand up by possibly getting out of the house more and getting away from the bible?

or you could die... just saying...

[Richwingxlr8]

I have a joke who is dumb enough to give out personal info on the internet and is also a homo kid who gets EXTEAMELY butthurt over comments for no reason and whould lose a fist fight even to pee wee herman?

JOSHU2UBER!!!!

[SlientCartographer]

All You Do Is Bitch About Random Shit.

FAIL

[ManchesterCitySongs]

HAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH­AHA hilarious! not.... 

[XXomgitshalenXX]

this kid blows his moms hairy cock

[Themastercode1235]

how he can inprove? die. die from falling off a ladder. at least that way it would be funny.

[baileycollinsvideos]

In soviet russia, food makes monkey.

BTW YOU SUCK.

[penisfordindin]

worst fucking jokes ive ever heard u can go kill yourself and you might as well stop making these gay pornos of urself...your wasting everyones time

[TheCoolman4649]

to improve your stand up...dont do stand up.....no offense but you suck...you laugh so hard and its not funny

[aFinnsTheory]

How can you improve your standup?

First tip:

DON'T.

Watching Waiting For The Bus (Cyanide and Happiness cartoon, you should totally check it out) is NOTHING compared to this.

*Silence*

Oh, right.

FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGOOOOOOOTTT­TTTT!!!!

[TheCoolman4649]

you basically stole the public restrooms thing from dane cook

[sharkbite717]

hmmmm how about stop doin stand up

[SirNumu]

How you can improve your stand up: Two options, the first being death, the second being 13 serial killers rape you, then death. I won't decide for you. WHAT'S UP WITH THAT! ^_^

[SirNumu]

@wildirish998 That is the best comment I have ever seen in my life. Thank you.

[blahlahaguy]

LMAO I COULDNT STOP ROFLING

[pspplaya97]

airports are supposed to be big dumb-but and i guess the food taste like a monkey made it cuz you cant even afford coach. you sneek onto the luggage section of the plane.

[coxmob09]

I think I would rather see Justin beiber's sextape then this shit

[TheParodyBoys86]

U can stand? Ur so fat your stomach grows over your feet!

[ilikescreamo1991]

this aint funny at all

[coOperativeDad]

Stupid cunt.

[YOURBOYH]

to improve your stand up ...well.... oh have you ever tried to tell jokes that are funny

[brianaceleste1]

i know 6 year olds with better jokes... when they're not even trying.

I don't think its even possible for you to improve that crap.

And what the fuck were u talking about at the end? that was like 20 things bunched into one sentence, loll

[cartooncutie16]

I cheated by looking at the comments.

[zzmadnesszz]

ahahah i laffed so hard i nearly fell out my dinosaur no mate get out wash ur mouth out have a bath u tramp u no the mens toilet part what part of it was a joke and the very start you laughed at ur self how gay...

[BananaBarny]

This will be making fun of my hate.. hate.. hater.. haters...

[aunulahehe]

is this ment to be funny and y has no one told him to take of that mask its not halloween and that is the last time I am telling him



[Ethaninja]

"They're so huge ya know.. hehe... omg I love huge things...."

[Dodoria31]

0:32 - Lame.

0:43 - It might get funny in soviet russia, wait. no. it doesn't work like that.

1:02 - Wait, what?

Homo.

[TheRogueWerewolf]

yeah guys whats the deal with airports

[smaser66]

OMG HE'S LIKE DANE COOK!! i cant even say that without laughing

[youboob6022]

This is painful to watch

[rejectofsoul24]

no, heres the deal about airline food:

I was at the airport, I had packed my bags at 4 in the morning. So I run out the door and play frogger across the major highways toward my flight. I go get my tickets and then go through security. My nailclippers were taken away for no good reason, I get on my flight and im off. Then I get hungry, so i order their $15 special. Tuna salad and crackers. I shoulda used the edge of the container to kill hijack the plane. =P

[mbmvcvdpzp]

have you ever been on a plane me to him >:( THE FOOD IS AWSOME!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH

[TheNachoKat]

i can't describe how unfunny that was, there is absolutly no way to discribe how god awefull that was.(i think i misspelled awefull) the chefs work hard on those planes, and its obvious why airports are big.

[jacobwatts2]

not funny -.-

[Windows7UIRocks]

Joshu2uber + Stand-Up= End of all Mankind

[czw123123]

thumbs up if you noticed hes getting this WHOLE thing off the computer

[SimpliztixX]

Dear God,

I have never asked you for anything, but please, please! Send this kid to a distant island with all of his friends.

Thank You,

Simpliztixx

[929DEMPSEY]

those airport chefs work damn hard on making food... better than you could do... and I bet they're a buttload funnier than you

[pyrometaltits]

uhh the food on the airport cost .50 cents

[TheBryan1022]

OOO GOD GET IT OFF!

[pspplaya97]

he studders to much. and 2 of all we all can tell your reading those "funny" jokes off the internet

[Stan844]

im sorry but this is just plain horrible

[TheWildALK]

How the fuck are you gonna do something like this on stage?

"And like like I'm better than you."

I'm sure the crowd's gonna love that. *ba-dum-kish*

[EliteDarkLord999999]

of course theres crap everywhere

its a fucking public bathroom retard

[Penguinsrbetterthanu]

There is no way this is real. It can't be. This is the kind of un-funny they say could NEVER exist! This is the kind of bad jokes they say could only exist in nightmares!

[krazygamer41]

gay

[TheOudie55]

how about bieng funny thats how 2 inprove homo

[Dragon313035]

you suck....homo

[Yellowcopter]

@HomoKidsVideos fail

[iMayoh]

"I'm better than you because I.... Anyway..."

That one was pretty good.

It's even funnier because it's true.

[iMayoh]

I love you.

[vanceification]

i never thought big airports were so funny

[zZG3n0ciDeZz]

id rther watch 2 girls 1 cup its better than this

[lampard554]

were these even jokes?

[saaariah]

hahahahahahahahahahahahaha that wasn't funny XD

[chukmokjr]

how he could improve his stand up is by not even doing it

[JB346Aussie]

Christ. I think my ears just died. This thing's jokes are really that bad.

Here's how you can improve

1: Get a stool

2: Find some rope

3: Stop onto the stool

4: Put the rope around the neck

5: Kick the rope away

Make sure you film it too. It would be the best stand-up ever.

[Yellowcopter]

@JB346Aussie You mean kick the chair away.

[JB346Aussie]

@Yellowcopter Indeed. if only youtube allowed comment-editing.

[pistons666able]

im lauhing becuz this crap is so stupid so public toilets are dirty the end lollll

[AndrewKelly01]

LOL he can't think of a reason hes better but there are shitloads of reasons why he is worse

[legoclonetrooper1234]

thats the worst jokes ever! fuck you josh

[legoclonetrooper1234]

i cant belive i saw this shit and lived

[BladeYaDeadCarnie]

public toilets, and airplanes?

the fuck kind of stand up videos is he watching?

[niggastolemybike100]

cuz like-like, im better than you, cuz im...uh-uhm... so anyways....lol

[blazejames47]

homo jokes

[lucasc666]

Dude, what's up with the generic jokes?

Florida is too hot, Canada is where it's at.

Better than me? I know that MUST be a sin!

[dannyw97]

hey numbnuts, that's not a hobby you were reading them off the internet. and your jokes sucks do some yo momma jokes like some simple ones like " yo moma's teeth so yellow I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S NOT BUTTER" seriously

[Nerdami21]

Wow what a g-great audience.

[IKrazyIKenn]

This guy is better then Tommy Tiernan and Michael McIntrye and Tommy Cooper!

[koolkid1]

rather than stand up, i think you'd be pretty good at sit down and shut the fuck up comedy.....im just sayin.....

[leonpal14]

wow i just realised something didnt god say all men are equal and here we have this fag saying AHAH IM BETTER THAN U CUZ I LIVE IN FLORIDA WHERE ALL THE COCKROACHES COME AND EAT MY FOOD HAHAHA!!!

[themostawsome2]

what the fuck i have a 6 year old brother and he makes me laugh

[westpointe3]

lol love the vuvuzela effect u can use

[PivotSharp12]

I think you can improve by making a funny joke

[USMCKidProductions1]

does this kid ever fly?

[USMCKidProductions1]

I thought you could you be funny than rwj.

[Turboprops]

This is the queen ant of Trolls, the mother hen of trolls, the trolliest troller of all trolls! Dont waste your time people, he feeds on your insults. 

[TheBeatleLoversThree]

what?!?!?!?!?

[SnickerBar100]

FAIL

[bumbledown08]

Tell some jokes...rather than just pointing things out.

[Squadillah]

Here's what you could do to improve your stand-up: GO SHOVE A 6-BLADE KNIFE DOWN UR THROAT AND TAKE UR FLORIDA AND VIDEOS ABOUT GOD AND SHOVE THEM UP UR FAT-ASS FRIEND'S ASSHOLE WHILE SHOVING A CRUCIFIX UP UR ASS, YOU LITTLE HOMO. btw i don't like u

[KSmittlez]

You don't say so yourself? Good because then you would be a fucking faggot...oh wait...

[xR3QU13Mx]

Now that we have all heard his attempt at stand-up, now its time for mine. . . . . . He is really good. . . . . No? not buying it? Damn! Wish I didnt quit the day job xD

[lopsided101]

I don't think I've ever seen such a douche, and btw you aren't good at stand-up, whether you say so or not. Stating the obvious and trying to sound like a rich cunt doesn't help, and saying "what's up with that" doesn't make the delivery powerful if there's no fucking punchline.

Improve your stand-up by learning something about the world you oblivious whore.

[Evin062008]

@lopsided101 it is not kergapana it's a guy named joshu2uber

[Spudfish93]

Bha ha ha!

You're shit!

Get some funny material next time.

[R3PR117]

i cant find a word to describe this level of fail

[SuperDavidlyon]

troll

[SuperAnimationGuy]

like like like like like like .. -,-

[cougars3419]

heres how to be better at stand up - tell jokes

[Joeljoe12345]

trollface

[benlaneconnor]

hey guys, whats the deal with airports? theyre so huge...thats great standup

[Lemonjelllo]

I'm better than you cause I... Erm, well there will be moar vidiyas aboot jezuz and erm yeah.

[kefer123622]

I am embarrased FOR you.

[NightMare1445]

LOL, i laughed when he was like "And im better than you because i.. um.. Anyway" LMAO!!!

[PHW]

hate hate hate haters

[PHW]

omfg your so hot bro lets dock

[cerryberrybaby1615]

>:|

[whatsfordinner62]

Hate hate hater haters

[NovaBlue95]

he doesnt like public toilets? what does he do? poop in the street?

[Raltsman]

._. Is there a word for this degree of fail?