Added: 6 months ago
From: AnorexiaRecovery
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  • I'm 13. I sit here at 1:30 in the morning. Bawling. I want to eat but I want to stay skinny. I don't want to hear my stomach scream anymore. I'm tired of hearing the stupid girls at school laugh and call me toothpick. But I still have so much weight to loose!!

  • Your gorgeous! I hope you have recovered from anorexia

  • Anorexia is a mental illness. How can a disease be your "friend." It's borderline schizophrenic-the hearing voices part that is. If you binged/purged, why don't you acknowledge your bulimia also?

  • @myprettypeace Yes anorexia is a mental illness, and thats why it can make you see things in a distorted way. I have met a lot of people with eds, and so many of them created a seperate entity for their ed, a sort of persona, a friend, and many pictured it as a friend. Thats part of how it is a mental illness, and its not voices like schizophrenia, its something impossible to describe unless you have been through it, which I hope you haven't. I fully am aware of my bulimia, I was diagnosed as...

  • @myprettypeace ... anorexia with bulimia tendencies. Its impossible to classify an ed, as everyones ed is different and it is not as simple as being 'anorexic' or 'bulimia' or 'compulsive eating disordered', but thats a whole new video! Hope thats helped explain it.

  • Props to you for being so blunt about your eating disorders. Eating out of bins sounds horrific, Lord knows what you must have felt about yourself at that time.

  • @StarberryPlacemats thank you, it was horrible. And a horrible memory. But it happens to so many people and its the hidden part of an ed that the media tends to hide.

  • This is really inspiring to me... My sister is struggling with an eating disorder and it is so scary that she really won't communicate with me at all. My other sister & I are supposed to visit her therapist soon to get advice on being support people, but not ever knowing how she is doing is the worst part for us. Anyway, it's so encouraging to see that recovery is always possible. Thank you!

  • I've been anorexic when I was a child, when I was about 6 i stopped eating (i suppose) I have pictures from my childhood,where you can see my bones, I've rejected to eat and hated food.

    Everything changed when Iwas 11, now I'm nearly 16 and everythings back together,sometimes I still look at food and think eww..but i know it's for my own good. Your beautiful by the way x

  • You are STUNNING! <3

  • just a question for you, do you smoke in real life ?

  • @fagladylover I smoke occasionally. How come? 

  • @AnorexiaRecovery I am asking cause normally both smoking and anorexia go together. Youre defintely a very good looking girl and smoking plays a role in the describtion of feminine sexuality and elegance. Would you be able to make and upload a smoking video please ?

  • Hi Kate, I was wondering if I could get your email to hear more of your story and to share our tips on recovery. I have had very similar experiences to the ones you have mentioned but have been working on recovery a lot since i returned from the UK. I am aiming to start my own channel soon but want to make sure I'm in a good place to do so as I don't want to be unhelpful/triggering. Thanks for all of your videos, I really get a lot out of hearing these things from someone else.

  • @YoureNotAone of course darling. Email me as I can never figure it out, I would be so happy to talk to you. I hope you are ok darling, I am so glad you are working on recovery. Stick with it. Fight for it. Don't ever give up xxx

  • you are absolutely gorgeous :O you really are, I hope you get the support you need :)

  • Butterstick no you don't I almost had it it was awful having to gain all the whight pleas talk I'd love to help you don't want to be an asetic

  • i want to be anorexic :'( but nuffin seems to work

  • Hi, I am a 16 year old twin aswell! We're both of normal weight but sometimes because of competetive sport I sometimes go through phases of not eating. I notice what helps me see sense is either going out and socialising, finding other ways to feel a sense of achievement, or if my twin sister copies me so I see how ridiculous it is. Try not to bring up the conversation of weight or food, that will only annoy her. Try and talk to her about something she enjoys, i.e hobbys or school? Gd luck xx

  • I can't inmagine having Anorexia. I love food to much. Well, sometimes I think I would like to be that skinny but then I think, I maybe will lose my friends so I eat again :) I am not overweight or underweight!

  • @THINSPIREDANA u shouldn't even be on here.

  • I'm sorry, I'm having trouble understanding you... Are you under water?

  • Hi,

    I'm just 12 years old. I started dieting in september 2010 when we started talking about calories in science and food classes at school. For christmas 2010, I was a healthy weight, enjoyed food such as chocolate, fruit, take-aways and I would eat them. However, in 2011, my weight dropped. I was on a caravan holiday with my family when my mam rung the hospital as she was worried. I was anorexic. I'm recovering, but it's took a long time.

    I'm so glad as are my family. Your video was great!!

  • First of all, you are so beautiful. I'm so glad I stumbled upon this. I'm a firm believer in God and that He loves everyone, but I have kind of always thought that I was the exception, that I was the defect. I know now that I have a purpose but I can't help but want to die this way. I've been in treatment before but my family literally has NO money. I would feel so guilty asking for help again. Do you have any suggestions?

  • Ana isn't your best friend, she's your enemy..

    Stay strong, your beautiful :)

  • @KittenSence you could suggest my channel or another persons, she may find she is able to speak to someone who has been/is going through it and reach out to someone. xxxx

  • @KittenSence I am sorry you and your sister are going through this, as I understand it is so hard as an outsider. I think you need to talk to your parents or approach a doctor about what to do, you have to be strong through this as your sister will need support and at times may fail to see what you are doing for her is for the best. You sound like a caring, loving sister, but this is not your responsbility at 16, you need to speak to someone else. Email me at any time...

  • You're a beautiful and a very inspiring girl. Continue to share your story, it's helping people all over the world.

  • I have a sister..she´s 13 years old and has a minor weight issue. She tries to eat as little or no food at all and make up excuses for voiding lunch and so on. Sometimes she eats a whole lot. I hope that it´s a teenaging thing, a little stage that girls goes trough at that particular age. But I´m wondering if these are symptoms of a possible threat? Great vid btw..

  • @Emilsk8t First of all let me say you are a wonderful and loving sister for looking out for her. To me these are the first signs of an eating disorder and even if they are not I would speak to your parents and talk about a way of approaching her. Lots of people notice eds at the begining but are nervous or unsure as to whether it is a problem, a lot of the time it can be nothing to worry about...

  • @Emilsk8t but if it is an ed then you know you have done something sooner rather than later, as the longer it goes on the harder it is to stop. I truly hope it is not, but if she is struggling with eating problems then its clear she has a loving and supportive family to help her. Much love x

  • @Emilsk8t Just tell her that she's beautiful. Try to make her self-esteem issues disappear.

  • Im amazed there arent any perv comments. lol awesome vid, keep it up!

  • I'm am suffering from bulimia , it all delveleoped after my mum and dad noticed me not eating - annorexia , so to prove them wrong i would binge eat in front of them then go up stairs and purge, i want to stop and is waiting for medical treatment but everyday is a stuggle andi just need any tips and surpport to get though this as the thought of making me fat is killing me x

  • @laurenisginger2010 Darling I am so sorry.I know this cycle,its how I fell into bulimia.I know the fear of 'fat' is overpowering, its overwhelming, its terrifying, but you know deep down that a healthy bmi is not fat.It is not overweight, it is healthy, it is needed for happiness and love as when your bmis low you cant do either of these things.It is positive your waiting for medical treatment, please email me at any time.I am here for you,you do not need to struggle alone xx

  • USA#1 > england

  • I'm crying now, thank you so much for sharing all those things anorexia made you do! I always thought I was a fraud when I was diagnosed because I would binge out of bins and strangers cupboards too. And even now I'm a healthy weight and trying to convince people I'm still in emotional pain since I've left hospital - and then I go and do something like binge, and I just feel like... I'm not worth the help.

    Your video has really reassured and comforted me, thank you x.

  • @KungFuCollie I cried reading this. It means the world to me to know this has helped you. I know where you come from, it takes years to recover from this illness, and most of recovery happens at a healthy weight. Feel free to contact me, your worth the help and so much more. Much love x x x

  • your gorgeous. ive had bulimia for 11years but my doctor doesnt seem to want to help me, guess coz im within normal weight range im not considered as in danger. good luck with recovery

  • @enemywithpride Thats such a horrible thing to go through, and something that happens to so many of us. Please change doctors or contact BEAT, they can help you find support groups in your area. They are out there, just sometimes its hard to find them. and contact me whenever! Good luck in the new year, may this be the last year bulimia is in your life x x x

  • The weird alien sounds make me think that there's hidden messages in the video....

  • You're so unbelievably beautiful! You have the loveliest hair oh my gosh! Wow! You seem like such a lovely person, this video has kind of made my day. <3

  • You are an incredible young woman--bright, strong and fearless!!!!! I'm positive your video will help many people and could save someone's life.....be proud!!!

  • @kittygus19 thank you so much, this means the world to me! Sending you much love x x x

  • I feel like Ana is becoming closer and closer to me, my weight is dropping and I'm now only eating 1000 calories a day.. I'm scared but it's so addictive! I feel so alone :(

  • @MissLaylaLola Darling you are not alone. Please do not let this illness get closer to you, do not let calories take over your life. I hope you have friends and family who you can confide in and have belief in recovery and want it. As you must want it, anorexia will give you nothing but sadness and isolation. Thinking of you x

  • @AnorexiaRecovery I told a friend and shes going to help me, even though its not serious yet she told me she'll help me through it, hopefully I can recover soon, your videos inspire me :) x

  • thank you your so brave. x

  • At first I was afraid you were going to be some "pro-ana" person, but you're not. And I want to thank you for having the courage to post this! This means so much to me! I'm so glad and thankful that you took the time to post this! God bless you and Happy Holidays! Thank you for the encouragement! <3

  • @Robertjcksn40 What´s your problem?! She is beautiful!

  • @Robertjcksn40 there is nothing worse than someone getting happiness from mocking an illness that kills people every day, kills brothers, sisters, daughters, sons, mothers and fathers. Real people, every single day, as it is a real illness. Please think before you comment something so insensitive again.

  • 1st world problem.

  • I've struggled with eating disorder including anorexia. One of the best things for helping me accept my body the way it is was to read R. Crumb comics, Conan the Barbarian and Heavy Metal magazine. Seeing women be glorified for their curves made me see myself in a new way

  • @RedJezka its amazing you have found this and can now see how we really are meant to be, healthy and happy. Good luck with the rest of your recovery, I will check these magazines out x x x

  • @AnorexiaRecovery Thanks! They really did make a difference, though sometimes I still get too self critical. I was the same weight I am now, it's stunning when I look in the mirror & see a normal girl, I realize how mentally distorted my reflection was. The more I was assured that men liked soft curvy girls, my image of the ultra skinny girls changed too, instead of being the epitome of beauty & grace they looked like the walking dead. I guess they do have one foot in the grave

  • @AnorexiaRecovery I enjoy eating well these days. It's important to remember that healthy natural food is not your enemy. I realized that I couldn't survive as an anorexic indefinitely, & if you decide to live & eat again, the longer you're anorexic the more problems you will have. I have blood sugar & digestive issues still to this day, & my metabolism was so slow it was really hard not to gain weight. Work out & fuel yourselves to gain strength, not lose it!

  • @RedJezka what a creative solution...

  • I cried a little bit watching this video. It reminded me so much of where I was just a year and a half ago. Thank you so much for sharing, for letting us all know that we are not alone and we are not crazy. I'm sure it wasn't easy. You are beautiful <3

  • This video has really spoken to me. I did alot of things when I suffered with my EDs that I have always been too embarassed to admit, but its nice to be reminded that it wasn't 'me' doing them - it was my disorder. Thanks for letting me let those things go and know that it's not that I am a bad person for letting them happen.

  • @jammyola thank you so much. this is what I wanted this video to do, speak to people who can relate and show them that they are not alone, nor are they a bad person because of the horrible things anorexia and bulimia can make people do. I hope you are well and happy, much love x

  • Thank you for your vlog! I hate depressing music and random google pictures!

    Good job for healing everyday! god bless you sweet girl!

  • You are beautiful!

  • @6524dancer

    Weird but true - all girls with anorexia have never been fat or ugly before and without any reason to change the body. A very strange disease, not only people in Somalia won't understand. They only starve by lack of food.

  • After struggling with Ana a few years ago, I gained a lot of weight after I started eating "normally" again. Yo-yo dieting was making me miserable....and then I discovered the low fat raw vegan diet and I haven't looked back. I am actually losing weight now and I can eat as much as I want whenever I want. :) I am so much happier now.

  • this is a really nice video, thankyou for making it :) p.s. you're so pretty :)

  • I'm circling the drain-I'm not there yet but watching these video remind me not to let myself get out of control.

  • I can relate to you soo much! Thankyou for making this video and being so strong and having so much courage to talk about the dark and emptiness of having a eating disorder.... you give me HOPE!

  • You're a really awesome strong person :) I'm glad you exist!!! <3 <3 <3

  • Hey lovely, You are so brave and amazing to admit the things anorexia made you do and im so proud of you for recovering! You speak so much sense and Thankyou. I was feeling so lonely tonight and you have really helped :) xxxx

  • you are SO beautiful. not only because you're slender, but because you have such a beautiful face and hair. it's lovely of you to put these videos up too. people are worth so much more than what they have been through in the past. and i know anoxrexia is not a choice, but for what it's worth - you're worth more than what you weigh

  • jebo bi te tako anoreksičnu

  • Stay strong my dear, you are beautiful the way you are. Dont ever let anyone tell you aren't skinny or pretty enough. Just live your life and be happy and healthy. When you do all the good things in life will follow. Keep spreading your msg so you can help other women out there. Best of luck :)

  • It is SO demoralising, i completely relate to everything you've said. Thanks for making this, i'm sure you'll make alot of people feel less alone. I admire anyone who is willing to talk about the lengths an eating disorder can make you go to, it really is brave :)

  • Comment removed

  • I relate to things in this video. Luckily i have never had a problem with binging and purging, my problem was severley restricting what i ate for a very long time and becoming more and more malnourished. How are you doing at the moment? XX

  • @MissPopCake

    I have had stages of both, I would severely restrict for long periods of time and then massively binge and purge. I am doing so well at the moment and I am so happy for it, I feel like I have recovered from this battle I have had for so long but I still know it will linger with me always and lurk over my shoulder but I am confident now that I can control my thoughts and ignore any when they reappear. How are you at the moment? much love x x x

  • @AnorexiaRecovery I am so glad you are doing well. In your most recent video compared to your oldest you look a lot more glowing and your hair is super beautiful and shiny! I have reached a healthy weight now but i really do still find it difficult. I feel huge and i am still obsessed with weighing myself an obsurd amount of times every day. I'm still suffering from hair loss, no periods and i still have lanugo on my back but hopefully with time that will go away. Stay strong, good luck. XXXXX

  • @MissPopCake Many think that once you hit a healthy weight you are 'cured',that is far from the truth.Being a healthy weight was a very difficult thing for me to come to terms with,I will post a video on it so I will let you know when I do. I am still suffering from the damage I have done to my body, but time and nutrition are both wonderful healers. The best thing I have ever done is thrown out my scales. Its heartbreaking and horrible but I think you sound like a strong girl who can do this. x

  • @AnorexiaRecovery: Hey, beautiful! Welcome back to NetLand! :)

    Wow... What a powerful video. This really spoke to me. Well done, sweetheart. Thank you for your bravery & for speaking out. You are awesome! I am here for you too if you ever need some support. *hugs offered*

    I am "Favorite-ing" this! Be well, precious one! Xoxox

  • @AnaGirlEmpath Thank you so much darling! And thank you for the support, it's wonderful to know there are gorgeous people like yourself there offering it. Sending you much happiness and love x x x

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