How to swear like a Brit

[rebeccawashere]

KONY 2012

[boldfurykeren]

I really wanted the last word to be 'Welshman'

[EmoPrettyBoy]

haha, sooo funny! :D

[toopyx100]

ive only ever heard a few of these words said... to you idiots out there its not acctualy like this as the video is a joke, just pointing out the obvious because someone out there must have thought these were real...

[ZomgItsPanda]

RODNEY YOU PLONKER

[abc123dsa]

'Be sent to live with your cousins int he countryside' LOL that happened to me once

[RachinaWimmer]

There is a hotel in my city named the Gaylord. I am embaressed to be a Texan

[cottoncandyaddict]

@RachinaWimmer HAHAH the Gaylord Texan! Yea, thats like the ONLY embarrassing thing about Texas. Now I know where you live! MWAHAHAH! JK, but hey, how about something that only Texas know about...so how bout that Trinity River?

[TheBeaarr]

2:49 1/2 speed :)

[VanillaOrchid95]

@bambam111992 Go Upper Peninsula!!!!! :)

[bambam111992]

Pasty is a bad word?

It's a food where I come from. In fact, I ate a fresh pasty for lunch today. They're incredibly delicious.

[Superstar33000]

@bambam111992 What's a pasty? The food I mean.

[bambam111992]

@Superstar33000 A pasty is where you take thin pastry dough and put on top of it some finely diced potatoes, meat (usually beef of some kind), rutabaga, bell peppers, caramelized onions, various spices, and mushrooms. The pastry is folded over before being cooked, so the result looks similar to a giant dumpling. (a good pasty should be about the size of two softballs)

It was made very popular in mining communities of the northern U.S., primarily the upper peninsula of Michigan.

[eatmorebananaz]

To this day, I still can't say anything level twoish without giggling and glancing around the room nervously... The woes of being bloody british ^_^

[Hayden8181]

I call my teachers a plonker. It's not really an insult... it just means your daft... example, someone falls over.... you might say 'you silly plonker' thats all it is...

[igotyuh11]

hahah poohead

[BobifyYou]

this video reminds me of a friend of mine. He was a total poohandle..

[TheTurnerBurner]

I am a Brit and i did not know half of those words lol

[LemonZeppelin]

You sillyface!

[KeepingKibbles]

You remind me a bit of Howard Moon from mighty Boosh, brilliant :)

[Ralphyt100]

133 dislikes?!?!?!?!!?! you milkybarpackiedodgers!!!

[soalgrinder]

so true.

[emmyl97]

Reading some of the comments is making me laughing, didnt you realise the sarcasm and comedy? :) very funny!

[LyndseyEmjayHood]

sorry but we dont say half of those words....

[ItsPastMidnight]

Oooh! I use the word bloody! And I'm norwegian, lol.

[CircleJerkHOLLIS]

jam hatch lmao

[jamesserpo]

"Berk" is an abbreviation of " Berkshire Hunt"...rhyming slang for "cunt".

So, yeah...quite bad ;)

[PassTheMarmalade1957]

Saying 'gaylord' is immature, and just makes you look thick.....'Lord of the Gays', on the other hand.....Now THAT shows class! ;)

"Oh, piss off, you massive Lord of the Gays!"

[foxyproxy123]

:O have you no decency? the s word? if i weren't british i'd portray strong emotion about that. however i will instead proceed to construct a strongly worded letter instead. poobrain.

[Arazmaspaz]

This was absolutely vulgar, to use these disgusting words on YouTube... my goodness, one is NOT amused.

[lllllllRobot]

Sillyface of Spades, was my prison name.

[Zapperzappy]

had to open up some porn just in case my mum came in and saw 'sillyface' on the screen

[panda3361]

if someone ever calls me a silly face im pretty sure i would laugh in their face

[chicken54209]

@panda3361 yes it's not real...

[djpj22]

the tags are brilliant =P

[geeg2192]

This made me laugh a lot.

[RossLikesCake]

I thought this was brilliant, however some Plonker in the comments thinks that Twat is on the same level of severity in swearing as Cunt. Um, no.

[Stevan1138]

Trolololol!

[plugindave]

I like how you have two pulp fiction posters next to each other. good job.

other than that your vid was alright i enjoyed it :)

[WsupRs]

fucking tosser!

[vdrxs]

I've lived in London for 3 years and i still dont' get it =))

[serasviktoria]

@vdrxs

he's trolling all the non-brits

level 7 is the most harmless level not the most offensive one.

a "sillyface" is a person who makes silly faces

what he does is just like if someone who can't speak english very well ask you how you can adress a black person properly and you say:

"just call him a nigger. it means that you like to be friends with him".

[iConverseMyLife]

my teacher use to call us plonkers all the time..

[minersWITHcoolSHOES]

minge....BWAAHAHAHA canadians....who the FUCK are they

[AVFCsi02]

You're a fucking bellend, you pillock LOL

[alanheat11]

i would just say your a fucking stupid cunt

[Davior95]

have you ever actully heard a Brit swear !??

[kapoof2]

you're a right fowl git ya know that khyan?

[Notchrhino55]

comb you`re hair sonny boy, you look a right scruffy potato, got that you SMEGHEAD

[AnimeSmile2]

Nearly fell of my chair when he said..Level 7. I'm still shaking

[BrightenHite]

fucking shithead

[sUNaRMYK]

poohandle LOL

[MrCarrick91]

Nork (Naughcs) supposedly Queens English for Knockers (Tits).

Haha this video was surprisingly amusing.

[samster174]

Ya clearly ain't been to the north of the UK ya jobby !

[sparklyrainboww]

I'm English and have never heard of the word 'nork.'

[sam8110]

@sparklyrainboww i agree, what the bloody el is a nork???

[TGENGLAND]

Americans really think we act like this. Fucking hell

[cheikalove]

Hahaha funny dude

[xXVenumosXx]

erm.... no we swear just like americans or anyone else :/

[NyanDani]

@xXVenumosXx you clearly do not understand British sarcasm.

[xXVenumosXx]

@NyanDani yep i do seems that I am british..

[therealjordiano]

SUBSCRIBED :D

[TheDixielandDiva]

translation pls... I know a few words...but I'm lost on a majority of them...

[DoctorWhoisPENG]

@3Dbread That's a twit :)

[Dkim808]

Oh bloody hell

[SystemEquation]

So if I go into a London pub and tell a bunch of guys that Chelsea football is a bunch of "cunting plonkers", I probably will get an interesting reaction?

[MANTLEBERG]

DIPSTICK, NAFF OFF, YOU WAZZAK , CRASH THE YOGURT TRUCK (JAK OFF) PISS FLAPS, TURD BURGLER, UP HILL GARDNER, SHIRT LIFTER, MARMITE MINER, ETC.

[SUNSET7900]

OMG HE SAID THE SF WORD U KNOW WICH ONE ITS THE ONE U SHOULDNT EVEN SAY ON RIOTS !!!!!!!!

[MaroonBugUK]

Um- I'm sure TWAT and CUNT are the very worst of swear words. Seriously- you but Twat on level 4 with Lovely Jubbely? WTF Lovely Jubbely isn't bad at all!

[Keilahx]

@MaroonBugUK Not sure you quite got the video....sillyface.

[EpicFail2374]

8-) the only one i no is wanker wtf

[thesimplethings42]

*gasp* he said sillyface!

[geebee444]

I thought a POOHANDLE was what Christapher Robin carried his bear around with.

[3Dbread]

i thought a twat was a pregnant fish.

[HCMusicAlliance]

/watch?v=8nMxNDvyVVU watch?v=CuBFAp6EmnY

How to swear like a Scot ;)

[MrFunnyfcuk]

Oh and half if those words wernt even swearing.. plonker is from only fools and horses, if you really want to swear and offend someone call them a fucking fuck up in life who is an ugly twat Haha

[beffwithanf]

@MrFunnyfcuk 'plonker' actually translates to 'fucker' but in a far more charming way.

[MrFunnyfcuk]

I actually use these words even before I saw the video Haha

[iMurkiit]

Slapped in the face by a tramps penis rofl!!!!!

[ItsLikeAFish]

Omg lol!!! Made me laugh so hard xD pasty. Ahahaha you ruddy wazzack.. Imma use that one now!

[DontMockThePenguin]

Gordon Bennet is two words, just saying...

[MegaBlackjack56]

pooHandle

[flyawaybeforeieatyou]

pahahahahahahahahaha

[mattissotrendy]

This video isn't remotely amusing.

[DrLemonDemonMan]

I find it funny how half the people watching this don't get it

[AlgernonsDream]

There is a special level 8 (for those who have never been to Britslandia) that I guess he didn’t have time to mention in this video

It’s called the fruit stage and basically you’ll find many Brits in cupboards and wardrobes quietly calling their nemeses a lemon or a melon or plum or something in the dark. This is because the police are allowed to shoot you dead on the spot if they over hear you using these words. There have been some tragic supermarket incidents over here, I can tell you.

[Smitho94]

no one says half this

[Smitho94]

wtf is a berk, I'm British

[Shaestel]

@Smitho94 -- You berk.

[MeganRockett]

Omg, plonkers my trademark ™ saying lol

People who dont like this are bloody plonkers! X awesome! Love being british! My life rules! Go brits!!!!! X

[Smash3x]

the "jamhatch" story about your friend earned you a subscriber sir!

[munkiemee]

Lovely Jubbly is not a swear word XDDD It means like, another word for 'Lovely' XD

[AcrossTheStars97]

I'm laughing so hard right now! The sad thing is I actually use a couple of these words!

[EpicTard1]

lol half of these words no one even says in england...

[SgtFuzzie]

This is classic mate :)

[dizziefree]

All the people who can't see the sarcasm are ruddy sillyfaces!

[Dhevix]

It's satire, people. He's taking the piss because I'd like to presume that nobody is actually that fucking stupid to think we say that shit,.

[e7l13]

I cant tell if people are insulting the video or suggesting swearwords. If you dont get the humour in this, you must be retarded

[ZOMGMiki]

How are people not getting the sarcasm? xD

[e7l13]

Thats the point idiots. Its taking the piss

[xFernEmmax]

U need 2 come n live in britain. I'm english myself n don't use any of those stupid words. Was funny 2 watch though. HA HA. :D

[sharareeves1]

no one says half these words ?

[luvabubble1]

i am british and i have never heard some of these words LOL funny

[GhostHeartbeat]

i'm british and i have to admit i've never heard some of those words being said, you're aweome btw <3

[LittleMissAbigail101]

I'm from britain and that's well wrong :/

[willans]

@LittleMissAbigail101 So is your grammar.

[SmithyMalcolm]

If you've never been to Britain, I have to comfirm, this is ALL TRUE. Love you Khyan <3

[xiRICEPUDINGXD]

just ... sillyface.... i mean you dont say say that you will get stabbed!

[RockyRaccoonsFriend]

George Harrison! You're alive!

[ohmyGAAHitsme]

*live



[ohmyGAAHitsme]

and if you like in Cornwall, "pasty".

[Sparttan12]

this is totally wrong, but fucking hilarious xD

[teemusicality]

Some people are pretty stupid, it's a joke!!

Haha :') it made me laugh so much! :D

[Cheerio271]

how is lovely jubbly a swear word?

[ManyAwsomeNoodles]

lol these sound so funny. "faff" isnt bad.

[beastdude]

omg he said sillyface, shit just got real.

[WilliamJsime]

You sillyf**e.

[styxfarshore]

Why has nobody mentioned 'snurge'?

No list is complete without that one.

[reservoirpo]

most of these words aint been used for years m8 if you called any brit some of those words he would first think wtf is this dick on about and then because we dont like being confussed u would get knocked out m8 p.s your a dick

[MadOldPete]

@reservoirpo herp derp

[Kel3L]

@reservoirpo he's not being serious...

[adamantchese]

right after watching this, i called my friend a sillyface

[bewareofsnow]

I downloaded this video, ripped the sound and made it play when my grandma turns her computer on

[vampiergirl008]

Fuck.. he said Sillyface.. D:

[unrealeck]

If you changed "brit" to "English" you'd be right.

[365Avalon]

Of course, only about 2 of those were swear words.

[puffleissocute]

im going to call my teacher a silly face :3

[crayzieeechick]

and if you live in Cornwall ... Pastie loooooool wtf

[RBickers9001]

I love how serious you are in this xD

[TheAlienabductionpro]

im asian..... 他妈的混蛋

[MrSampleName]

You poohandle sillyface! I loved this video! :D

[leelz123]

I meannn I'm American, I lawled.... that top commenter is pretty cunting

[MrDanman84]

this is getting serious, saying these words, is like taking some ones Hawaiian pizza, taking off all the pineapples off, and replacing them with pubic hair.

[shsgabrsm]

How did you keep a straight face?

[Superanimatordude]

Are you american? Because if you are then you are a idiot. I am british and I have not do anything wrong!

[MrDanman84]

@Superanimatordude nah, hes 100% british, no american knows what a pillock is

[WaNkInGsQuIrReL]

I wish I had your accent! :) And I'm actually English.

[blackoutmediaonline1]

congratulations!! this is the first video i ''liked'' on youtube!!

[RelativelyHostile1]

I thought this was a serious list of english swear words at first. I was worried that i didn't know half the words. then i realised it was all a joke and i was like phew. btw i think i know the highest level swear word neways, it was said in this video already ^^

[thepfishful]

I HATE ALL YOU FUCKING S***YF***S

[teamswitzerlandx2]

Lol, just watching a comedy programme (have i got news for u) and they were saying literally half of these as i watched this.

[somethingmemorable1]

You cunting pl****r

haha fantastic censorship.

[SimplyyBiBi]

That right here was true British humour, taking the piss out of people who don't get your joke through extreme sarcasm. Fucking love it :')

[burnzy3210]

since when was "lovely jubley" offensive?

[HairBrigade]

@burnzy3210 He's joking at the expense of those who are not familiar with English expletives.

[ChildOfChaos64]

for me, twat is better than bugger XD

[LittleGurner]

Poo Handle?!?! LOL wtf

[unfukkkmee]

DEATH TO ANGLO-BARBARIANS

[MrDrgreenthumb666]

@oohmatron71 i know my history. and btw im from the south u british bitch

[blazethekiller11]

@MrDrgreenthumb666

Does he give a shit you american twat?

[MrDrgreenthumb666]

@oohmatron71 we don't need your small ass military !

[Shapeum]

Lol it's funny that your using are internet and are computer, then taking the piss and i never heard of any of the 1st lot

[mohsenuk1]

he is a porn star

[jackandjuice]

Pretty exhaustive list, but you forgot "giblet-stash", "quine", "nont-peeler" and "narble" (as in "[to] narble a sninge"). You sillyfa-- no, sorry, won't happen again.

[KorasiGaming]

Oh, I didn't know this was:

think of as many ways to describe yourself.

[sillyjumbledupshit]

warra fuckin twat

[unfukkkmee]

DEATH TO ANGLO-BARBARIANS

[Speukan]

@unfukkkmee Might be best to start the *death to Anglo-Barbarians* by not speaking the language idiot.

[urmumzfat]

Everyone press "8".

[LucyTree]

You disgust me!

[XJemiNelenaLoverX]

Well It seems a lot of people don't get the point of the vid and if its a crime to not want people putting stereotypes on English people then sorry. Im sick of people making videos like this and giving us a bad reputation

[banzaii02]

Fucking Cunt.

[MrBass1983]

dick head!

[De7HFr0mAb0ve]

my british friend said that the worst thing you can call someboddy in britain is 'saitan.'

[MrDrgreenthumb666]

FUCK THE U.K no 1 gives a shit about that tiny little island !

[MrCherubhair1]

@MrDrgreenthumb666 Yes they do actually, and its funny you talking shit when your from the most hated country in the world, fuck off you ameriCunt.

[XJemiNelenaLoverX]

@MrDrgreenthumb666 oh shut up american bastard

[mitsumi76]

@MrDrgreenthumb666 Like watching Fox News then?

[facebook12311]

i dont find this funny at all am im british it just pisses me off no one swears like that ive never heard any of these be4 i say bastard bith slut whore fuck crap dickhead an other shit....

[GreenEyedMonster96]

@facebook12311 Someone does not get the point of the video

[RelativelyHostile1]

@facebook12311 lol u clearly don't get it

[TheXxVIP3RxX]

Lovely Jubbley is cockney, and I love saying Knob Jockey! It owns people

[maddielovespink123]

Only english people would understand why this is funny :D