Mass Effect 2- Mordin's Safe Sex Talk

[syafiqjabar]

If you have sex with Tali in ME2, the infection will eventually kill her in ME3.

OK, not really. But that would have been something, eh?

[blackmaxpayne]

sry i thought it was your mouth....

[FallenAngelH3]

So where is this booklet?

[jeramahia123]

Tali always was my favorite character, much nice and independent and interesting (and far more cute) than the other characters, especially the other females.

Tiara = annoying, stick fork in my eye

Ash = racist, stick fork in her eye

Jack = creepy, I think we should just be friends (and that I should keep my balls)

Miranda = interesting yet lack in similar interest (plus she's a bitch)

Tali = cute, funny, nice, interesting, history, sexy accent, element of mystery around her = WINNER

[3meryRose]

@jeramahia123  ....Liara. With an L....

[gateship2]

@3meryRose That typo was probably auto-incorrect. Liara isn't a word, tiara is.

[JedediahZ00pop]

@jeramahia123 TOTALY AGREE GO Tali!!!!!

[Hunkyfish20]

Advice booklet?...... mordin you swain XD

[ArchieNDM]

This guy's epic. He should have his own TV show.



[MrCombineGuy]

Mordin: Oral contact with tissue dangerous, take precautions.

Shepard: .... What?

Mordin: Was talking about oral sex.

Shepard: Aaaaw yeeeaah!

Mordin: Yeeaaah!

[MrWetTowels]

How I felt when she said it was worth it. I BEAT THE GAME!!!

[Arachnaphillic]

PFTTT laughed so hard

[lightningwu]

I'm Commander Shepard and this is my doctor for porn and sex :)

[xkillacam1993]

Tali: Good. I want you to see what's behind this damn helment.. I need to feel your skin against mine..

Mordin: 1:00

[Turk343]

lol mordin gave shepherd condoms and porn what type though asari human krogan???

[masterof3light]

@Turk343 With Krogan strength condoms who needs the genophage.......KROGAN MAN!!!!!!

[darrius13sniper]

How was tali even born? if it's dangerous as mordin described

[SinDawg030]

@darrius13sniper Quarians are Dextro-Amino acid like Turains. Humans are Levo-Amino Acid. That makes allergic reactions more likely than Dextro on Dextro.

[Kotazo85]

@darrius13sniper her parents had quite a hangover after making her...They have sterilized rooms to...breed....And newborns are put in a bubble until given their first enviro suit...Tali's mother died of a virus....I say they better retake their planet Ranoch or else they will get extinct....this reminds me the Marvel Character Rogue...her first boyfriend went into a coma after they kissed...

[kunven]

@darrius13sniper well according to some chat tali was born and was put in a buble and spent there for 13 years until she was given her suit lol epic childhood

[CallmeAffiliated]

how do you fuck mordin i wanna make this little bitch my fuck slave

[ShayLee0501]

So it's too dangerous to give Tali head before sticking a sterilized dick into her? That sucks for her. Shepard probably doesn't care the womanizing bastard.

[ViciousArbiter]

how do u get him to say this?

[MrCrackerJack420]

@ViciousArbiter You have to pursue a relationship with Tali. After a few converstations that lock her in as a romantic partner go and speak to Mordin and this dialogue will follow

[ViciousArbiter]

@MrCrackerJack420 i slept with her, had a convo, talked to mordin, nothing.

[GangsterHutterite]

Tali, your sinuses are filled with something known as "semen".

[AughustoCV]

@GangsterHutterite lol, I thought the same thing when she said that.

[foreverknight13]

praza and his crew dilsiked this.

[wiler1100]

click cc then transcribe audio , enjoy

[Kreuzritter1989]

@wiler1100 "...nasty communist sinuses..." Tooooootally hillarious!!! :D

[AmunRa1]

Tali: I'm running a fever, I've got a nasty cough and my sinuses are filled with something I can't even describe.

Me: D=

Tali: It was totally worth it.

Me: =D

[LastODSTStanding]

@crazymime Really? I did, it's a real shame. Tell me, did you get the Collector Edition?

[Crazylatinokid7]

YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! Ye-

Can it wait for a bit? I'm in the middle of some calibrations.

[Tridda21]

Mordin: Aight', so to give you the quick version, Don't fuck her to hard or you'll kill her, no blowjobs, and here's some porn to keep you away while I go jack off. Also, Edi has editional porn for joker and you.

[Ki55Meh4rse]

Tali has all the sinuses of a cross-species babeh. Well, that or... she just ate a Heavy's sandvich

[DeathDealer1997]

that ending was hilarious

[wonphi]

Glad to have you on board Mordin!

[Historymaker2001]

I was like WTF and laughing my head off when I talked to Mordin after locking in an ME2 romance for the first time. I was like "WTF you gave me pron and lube to use on Tali?!"

With Miranda he mentions creative uses of biotic fields too LOL.

Oh, Mordin, glad you're aboard!

[lolguygoeslol]

1:40 I can hear Bison's voice screaming YES! YES! YES! --in my head, of course.

[Insomniac22100]

last twenty seconds that's what she said.

[Simonboy5]

HOW COULD I LET HIM DIE!? WHYYYYY...

[TheGomesTuga]

I call mordin to be my personal doctor!!!! xD

[MegaDchamp]

Haa "Wait a minute mordin,youre just yankin me around arent ya? ;)"

[Bykerigan007]

I have a question, if Quarios get sick easily do they get an STD after sex?

[nanoradio]

@Bykerigan007 yeah its called death

[XenonLxx]

omg! :))))) i just watched this chat today :) while playng mass effect :)

[Ogasmic]

i was playing this yesterday and since im going for Liara and i talked to Mordin so much he thought i was coming on to him...and he was right

[RockigualAnime]

ja ja ja this is the best video ever. You already know guys, take

precaution to avoid uncomfortable situation in your sex life,

specially with a quarian.

[StrigonLead]

low immune system....heavy risk...BUT THE PRIZE

[Kevooi]

Aw man. I know Mordin advises people... but I think I didn't get into a relationship fast enough for him to advise me on someone else.

For me, Mordin suggested Shepard was interested in Mordin himself.

[1111111888]

Does anybody find " Mordin your just yanking me around" i laughed my ass off.

[DivideByZeroGetCake]

I know what her sinus is full of...

[FrigidAxe]

@DivideByZeroGetCake You wish, nose-fucker.

[Muzzly1234]

I get the feeling Mordin whacks off to cell reproduction xD

[AmericanMilitia09]

That was funny, try Garrus as a female character!

[AciDD00M]

Mordin just gave you some porn and lube Shepard.

We need more helpful doctors like this one!

[p90xsteroids]

@AciDD00M thats because mordin doesnt depend on insurance/medical companies for income

[crazymime]

I never did get the email regarding those positions :(

[Reyn888]

What did Dr. Sheldon Cooper do to himself?

[BiohazardLOS]

when shepards make love, he hold the line!

[lordevarts]

mordin is nicknamed "doctor knows-everything"

[CrashB111]

@lordevarts And we know he is in ME3 FUCK YEAH.

[mrpav8]

:DDD

[Aracknia]

Mordin just can't keep out of Shepherd's personal life... but it probably saved Tali's life to some extent... Although the one with Thane is rather... interesting.

[MrOpenGamer]

@Aracknia

Dyslexic fuck. I bet you are among the 29 cunts who disliked this video.

[Aracknia]

@MrOpenGamer How am I dyslexic? And I didn't dislike or like this video. I actually find these talks with Mordin to be funny.

[MrOpenGamer]

@Aracknia

You can't even spell Mass Effect's protagonist's name. How can you truly be a fan of Mass Effect when you can't even spell "Shepard"?

[Aracknia]

@MrOpenGamer Well, excuse me for a simple mistake. It's pronounced the same way, so does it really matter? It's certainly no excuse for you to go insulting me so rudely. And if I were truly dyslexic, I'd be messing up more words than just a name, so get over it.

[TriLink12]

@MrOpenGamer Bit of an over reaction there buddy.

Chill.

[MrOpenGamer]

@TriLink12

You chill, I'm obviously just trolling.

[TriLink12]

@MrOpenGamer Oh yeah, the old " everything I just said is irrelevant because I'm a troll defense".

Sorry, but no. That's sum weak sauce buddy, and it ain't gonna fly here.

[Justas923]

Wish I could talk like Mordin. Smartass

[GAZGHOST123]

@Justas923 I KNOW!!!!!!!!!

[mrtoshko]

looooooooooooooooooooooooooooo­oooooooool xD

[VieraShepardFTW]

You have sex, and die!

[LinksRoyal]

troublesome? for Tali ? ANYTHING! XD

[Hugia15]

What Tali meant say was,"I cant believe you figured out a way to make that work with my freaky backwards legs!"

Shepherd thanks Mordin for sending him sex position advise.

[ydouateme]

You sir...are a LEGEND

[failurbanik]

@sdcazares1980 thank god its safe .......wait it said some shit like endoskeloton thats not human i think or it is and the wiki is just pulling my dick to make me think i f.cked a preadtor

[MusicMan53100]

"It was totally worth it!"

YES!

[Peterlinkdark11]

Lol want mordin as my docter :)

[failurbanik]

what tali ment to say was "just so you know my ass hurts i cant walk straight i got the flu my noses have cum in them and joker taped us. and it was totaly worth it"

[failurbanik]

i srry but this has just dawned on me if this is the future with ftl drives and shit that can resurect you why is her immune system such a problum and the gentic barriors i mean a scientis like mordin would probluy have the time to fuck with her immune system and both of theirs dna

[xvise66]

I wish mordin gave me "the talk".

[NemiroffNike]

Mordin died in my WAY !! ; (

[senselesschaos]

i fucking love mordin he's my absolute best friend

[thereignofdarkness]

Tali sounds like she's 18

[anonymous133711]

"studying cell reproduction...less alcohol and music required"

mordin's gonna fap LOL

[The7guys]

LOL

[Mahbu]

SHIPPING LEGION AND SHEPHARD.

[naruhinafan274]

I wish that Mordin was my sex ed. teacher.

Mordin: "Alright class, today, I'll teach you about sexual intercourse. I have brought videos."

[masterchiefjoe]

@naruhinafan274 who wouldn't want mordin as there teacher

[Jafroboy]

@masterchiefjoe Well be careful, remember he tried to kill his last student.

[masterchiefjoe]

@Jafroboy but he turned on him tried to cure the genophage

[999Zaptor]

@naruhinafan274 Actually, he'd say "Class. Teach you about sexual intercourse. Brought videos."

[naruhinafan274]

@999Zaptor There you go. I don't know how to speak Mordin. Do you think he's related to Master Yoda?

[morgand2016]

@naruhinafan274 Today cass we will be discussing sex with vorcha granted it will hurt like hell

[kcc1396]

were i the info he sent you

[sgtboom7]

im commander shepard and tali is totally worth it

[TheAceofThePack]

Mordin: Now if Tali touches you done there, without your consent come straight to me

Shepard: Okay Mordin, you're always looking out for me.

[LaLiLuLeLo1991]

"YESH! YESH!"

[gimee50k]

Lol, he talked and all he said was "not interested" because i am with tali? i suppose it has something to do with renegade/loyalty.

[darthgueedo]

Mordin: "...Oral contact with tissue dangerous...."

Shep: "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA­AAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?!?!"

Mordin: "CLOSE COMBAT! PROBLEMATIC!"

[GreenDayFtw0]

Don't forget the Turian safe sex talk as well xD

[brucenatelee]

I never got a sex talk. Also, can you recruit Liara after the Shadow Broker DLC mission? To distribute her points only to use her once seems insulting, especially if I can't get with Samara. Been trying to get with Tali since the first game. At first, I though she was half naked, showing skin, only to be disappointed that it was an actual body suit.

[werewolvesrock1995]

mordin is funny with these sex talks but have you seen him sing?

[CptNemanja]

I think we all know what her sinuses are full off. :D

[Matkingos]

1:00 Best Mordin Line ever

[VelasLupus]

SHOCKING SUGGESTION!

[DrTheKay]

You arent funny, idiot uploader

[TheTapeClub]

You know hes been planning this for a while.

[belittle12]

Sounds like he has done this before.

[GuaranaClyde]

Speaking matter-of-factly, a quarian-human or turian-human relationship could kill the human partner too. Allergic reations to opposite chirality amino-acids work both ways, and represent the biggest factor of danger.

[THEGUITARGOD808]

i wish he was my health teacher. lol

[KCChiefsAdams]

Where's the info he sends you?

[Sauronich]

Should've added Mr. Bison's "yesshh-yesshh" at the end.

[AZLionheart312]

LOL

[MrDeadpool78]

1:01 Meaning he's going to masterbate

[KCChiefsAdams]

@MrDeadpool78 Hilarious, you had me cracking up for a while. Haha.

[MrDeadpool78]

@KCChiefsAdams LOL Good to hear

[bardock421]

Now I'm wondering if you hook up with any other human if they get all preggo in the third game and can't be used in battle

[1337Figaro]

I wonder what his advice would be if you would have a romance with Legion or Grunt -.-

[ultimatekotorfan]

@1337Figaro Grunt: Krogan genophage will insure no pregnancy, so no need for birth control. Most likely Grunt is statistically...... large. Take precautions before copulation. Blood rage might kick in if you make a mistake.

Legion: Watch out for electrical plugs. There are crotch guards for a reason. Whatever you do... don't plug in. Not worth it... most likely. Depends. Never used synthetic before, though I assume you have one in your bedside table?

[matt1143]

So all those years in the Salarian STG and Mordin acquired info on how to have safe sex with aliens. .

[ultimatekotorfan]

@matt1143 More like Salarian STD.

[Jerynuka]

@matt1143 Scary isnt it :D

[Teeheehee093]

this is why i love mass effect 2 its funny its emotional its deep and engaging

[GhostLink92]

So EDI has been holding out on the Quarian porn this whole time? Bitch...

[Poodleinacan]

Haha!

Ah, it's just a cold. Take some Buckley and every thing is gona be alright!

[MusicMan53100]

If only getting/giving the real "talk" could be that easy! lol

[PressXtonotdie]

Best bit of the entire game. I love mordin.

[monumentalbasser]

i lulled hard

[ketulu]

and with Legion? It has got a vibrator mode

[fast0lf]

Yes!

Yes!

Yes!

Epic!

Epic!

Epic!

Epic!

Epic!

[kroz85]

when i talked to mordin about this y mouth was open the entire the time

[mbbell23]

LOL Awesome ending!

[sephorasmuse]

This video made my day! <3

[Patryk13m]

1:38 this music comes on when a man hears the word 'sex buddies' ...

[porkbellyroast]

@Patryk13m yeah, `VICTORY`!!

[stream0fspin]

best sex was with subject zero. rough and hard. but was nothing against the scene with liara from ME1...

[LastODSTStanding]

Wait...."self-sterlize?".....-­Looks down at croutch-.....you don't mean...

[Numdenu]

Tali: It was totally worth it.

*HEROIC MUSIC*

[GrexxSkull]

"So Tali are you ready to get it on?"

"Yes Definat- ASSUMING DIRECT CONTROL"

"GODDAMNIT!

[SquallCloud]

@GrexxSkull

LOL!

[hedanit0]

YES!

YES!

YES!

YES!

YES!

That made me rofl.

[mousetum]

This vídeo is a complete LOL.

And the character of Mordin Solus is completelly awesome! Give an Oscar to the actor who gives the voice to him! xD

[Justice517]

ok i have sex with mirand BECAUSE she is the perfect women and shepard is perfect and when she has a baby HE COULD WALK ON WATER HE WOULD BE JESUS!!!!!! but if you played the shadow broker mission it says that MIRANDA CANT HAVE BABYS!!!! she is the perfect women lol!!!

[Chewin3]

@Justice517 So? Adopt a Quarian if you like

[ssjdagas]

Totally worth it!

[tore1992]

What mordin is trying to say: USE CONDOMS FOR CHRIST SAKE!!!

[Stantzs]

oral contact with...tissue

[ronnoc360]

Achievement unlocked

50g Paramour

AAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWW YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!

[jakerocker456]

Mordin is hilarious and creepy at the same time LOL

[videogamemaniac001]

How the fuck does he know that Shepard likes Tali?!?!?! Mordin's a stalker!!

[virofe70]

Better yet advice about Jack: suggest padding walls...

[lol5043]

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOL­OLOOOL!!!!!!!!!

[GrizzlerBorno]

You don't really have "sex" with Tali. You just make out and shit right? cause if she got out of the suit, she'd definitely be dead.

[02predator]

YES! YES! YES! XD

[jman0955]

quarian herpes lol

[Anonymousdrifts]

Oh, hell yes. This is one of the best things I've ever seen. xD

[Staggnyt]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! oh god!

[KudokanJudo]

So was it worth it?

Tali: Totally..

YES!

[itscoolbro2]

I'm Commander Shepherd and this is my favorite video on YouTube.

[SupaKillah666]

@itscoolbro2 Shepard stop "Borrowing" YouTube accounts. The Citadel already has a full scale war which store is the best for you already. Geesh! Oh great now they are after m-

Harvester: Assuming Absolute Control! *Harvests all the Reapers becoming 20,000% more stronger* Nap tiem! :3

Shepard: Wrex.

Wrex: Shepard.

Tali: @_@ *Head explodes due to overload of mindfuck*

[Umimugo]

@itscoolbro2 Well i'm GENERAL SHEPHERD

[bobbib369]

no blow job for shepard ether

lolololololollollololololololo­lololololololololololololololo­lololololloololololololololo

[bobbib369]

lollololololololololololololol­ololololololololololololololol­ololloololololololololol

laft throu the whol thing

lolololollolololololololololol­olollololololololololololololo­lololololololololololololololo­lololololololoolololololololol­ololololoololololololololololo­lololololollololololololololol­ololololoololololololololololo­lololololololololololololololo­lolololololololololololoololol­ololololllllllllllllllllllllll­lloooooooooooooooooooooooollll­lllllllloolololololololololool­ololololololololololololol

[KevinBusomjack]

I hate Tali! That bitch refused to nail me after I told her to back off Legion so I sent that bitch to her death and then went down to the engine room to nail Miranda while laughing at Tali's stupidity.

[sincewhen15]

@KevinBusomjack you killed Tali! Bastard!

[sincewhen15]

@KevinBusomjack you killed Tali?! Bastard!!!

Alchohol and mood music my ass! SEX SEX SEX S