Homos, fears & schools: AES Delhi, a nightmare realized

[FrasEmpress]

I jus wanted to say that u were 1 of the greatest subs I've ever had!! The dance class which u subed for Ms. Lowen ws the best dance class I've ever taken in my life! I'm sure I'm nt only speaking on my behalf bcuz we did request that u come in after that...of course she a .... but I jus wanted to tell u that u r amazing n wat AES did to u ws unacceptable! They should've understood the situation b4 making ne decisions!

Love, Jessica (If u remember me) :P...

P.S. Sorry this ws late, I jus saw it!

[microguts]

@FrasEmpress lol everyone is good when they're substituting for Lowen anyway. I don't really know you, but I know cause go to AESHS right now..

just pointing it out.

[diepiriye]

@microguts For me dance is a life-line, a medicine, a tool to connect and reconnect, and so much more. Hopefully you manage to have a great time, learn and grow a lot with all the resources at AES.

[decingham]

Dr. Sirotin was a fucking bitch prostitute fat piece of shit.

[diepiriye]

@decingham Although I know of many students and parents who would completely agree with you - and with good reason- I'm gonna give her the benefit of the doubt because I am sure that somehow, somewhere in her heart, she has the best interests of youth in mind. Just like anyone else, I am sure that she's dealing with her job the best way she can in spite of her own insecurities. Perhaps knowing her is a serious lesson in compassion for us all.

[tstarkisironman]

dude ill agree with you though but you know what? good you got fired in a way so you dont have to live in india the shit hole. I mean you dont deserve that. Plus the teachers and principals suck eh? well wherever ur living now, your lucky. I got a little while left THEN IM OUT OF HERE! and i cant believe they fired you over youtube..i mean what your teaching them bad language? those fuckers already know all the swear words...well anyways peace bro...

[diepiriye]

@tstarkisironman Indeed. At a certain point I realized that I was caught in the middle of a generational gap, b/c the administrators at AES had no idea how 'this internet thing' really works. Kids google teachers! They google their friends! Duh! Either that, or there is an unofficial and illegal reason why I was fired, which would have been just as unreasonable. So, yes, sometimes it takes fire to motivate us to change, because folks can easily become complacent & indifferent in such a school.

[BananaTheCockatiel]

i totally respect you and fuck AES i hate going everday so fucking judgmental.

[diepiriye]

@BananaTheCockatiel

Hey, thanks for the kind words. I appreciate that especially since i really enjoyed interacting with the students at AES so it was really insulting to eve have to deal with this in the modern day. Pay close attention at AES and learn all you can because it will be your generation that gets us out of this mess. AND enjoy school no matter what!

ironically, the day I was fired, several students told me about starting a Gay/Straight Alliance, and I've heard that it's going well.

[lolkid1234543212]

good thing you got fired!!!

I bet you tried to rape someone, they would not fire you for just being gay.

can you tell me your name so I can ask my teacher about you?

[diepiriye]

I want to leave this comment here because I think that it is important to establish the sort of environment we're working in here in India, even if it's American soil. The huge issue that I have had with Americans abroad is the conservatism that can often reduce 'American' to white even in common conversation. And then to believe that we're so darn liberal when b/c we travel, though never truly confronted with difference b/c they live in a military style compound. Good job.

[nat99111]

@lolkid1234543212 your a sad sad human being who obviously does not know shit

[cho474chang]

wow, im really sorry. i used to go to AES and i remember you. i didnt realize you had been fired.

[diepiriye]

Yup, it was pretty shady, & Dr. Sirotin wanted this kept quiet because I believe that she knew that this was a real shady deal.I have come to understand that there is a lot of 'politiKing' going on at the school and that education is only a part of their main focus. I'm moving on to complete my PhD. Still, their means were really insulting & defamatory to me personally.

Luckily the school is evolving for the students despite the admin madness. I appreciate you for reaching out to me. Thanks.

[YogiToad]

What led me here was that I looked up vids on the lotus sutra and saw you reciting it and was actually shocked to see an African American reciting an eastern scripture with a mala in his hands, lol... it sounds narrow minded but not many African Americans are into eastern culture,at least not by my exposure.I am really impressed by your inner beauty and subed.

[diepiriye]

Thanks for the kind compliment. You might be surprised to know this, but I grew up in a Black Buddhist community in Louisville, Kentucky. We're a part of a larger organization, SGI, but as we meet by neighborhoods, & America is extremely racially segregated, this meant that I had the luxury of being surrounded by critically thinking and compassionate minded Black folks all through my childhood, & for this I am eternally grateful. What was strange to me is how few Christians respect difference.

[Magnesiumfire]

You ever seen the movie Charlie's Angels? As minority culture people our lives are often very similar to undercover agents. We continually go into situations that we know, aforehand, to be dangerous, but we do so in the strength of our convictions. Our work is to change (sometimes only subtly) mindsets. We have to accomplish as much as possible before our secret identity is discovered. On no account should we see rejection as failure. We simply become stronger for the next assignment. Good job.

[diepiriye]

Wow, that's a powerful metaphor. I like that. The whole secret identity is that we're not the docile tokens people would often like for us to be, but actually living, breathing critical thinkers, who are interested in keeping things moving forward. I sincerely appreciate your words of encouragement. It helps a lot.

[diepiriye]

Just re-reading your comments and wanted to thank you again for the very kind, and apparently timeless words of encouragement.

[cynthiarf]

this is so unfortunate but not surprising as u said. if u should ever take on another prim edu teaching pos i think u should tape ur classes (maybe even post here? ;)

1) as a teachg tool for 'us' to see ur teachg style and its affectiveness and

2) for u to docu the lack of deviousness they so desperately want u to have to reason their feelgs about u

the biggest disappointg lesson ive learnd as an adult:

'adult behavior' is often lackg when u need/expect it the most - in business and family

[diepiriye]

Not a bad idea overall, and I have taped myself conducting seminars before. it works well. In this case, however, it really seems that there is much more at play than meets the eye, for example I get a threat as a comment on YouTube and then it comes true. Who knows what back-handed things were said or done that had little to do with me as a person and more to do with some administrator's job versus the parents of some kids who have an important role in the embassy here in Delhi.

[cynthiarf]

yeah, i do believe you were 'dealing' with some power trip there in Delhi. that society has such a diff dynamic, social structure, etc and im sure no laws that would protect u - u are brave to even be living there imo.

im surprised they hired u in the first place with this attitude/response to ur personal vids that had nothing to do with ur job...aka if the principal likes his wife/partner to wear a catholic school girl uniform for sexual gratification should he be fired? ridiculous

[YouKnowWhoToCall]

i go to aes now and i have to say, YOUR TALKING SHIT. Aes now has a GSA, and i openly accepts all people, regardless of sexuality, gender or race.

[diepiriye]

I fully accept that yours is the strong impression that the school gives off. I am concerned, however, that as with any project of confronting difference, the road requires dialogue and negotiation. For many mainstream students, the school is a very positive experience- any place is. Yet, when we value diversity in attitude, thought as well as background -or even as a result of cultural background- we cannot only cater to what's mainstream. This inevitably leads to uncomfortable discussions.

[diepiriye]

BTW, some students mentioned to me that they were hoping to start a GSA, so I am extremely glad that this has actually come through! Yippie! That's great news. Perhaps it's even a different world than the one I left month back. That's really, really good news. Thanks for sharing that.

[YouKnowWhoToCall]

i must say i completely respect your style of life and your maturity. i had you as teacher once and i actually thought your were very inspirational.

[diepiriye]

Thanks for the kind words. It's very nice of you to say. Hope school is going well for you. How's college planning going? Never too early or too late to think about it.

[EyeWearMySunglasses]

Sometimes life will trip you in in order to propel you forward.

hey throw some Femi on too and get to writing that curriculum! :)

[diepiriye]

@EyeWearMySunglasses Well said. I love that, in fact. "Sometimes life will trip you in in order to propel you forward." THis saying will stay with me. Thanks for sharing that bit of encouragement.

[diepiriye]

That's the spirit. And please continue to speak out. Use whatever medium you have- the net, anything. And please do talk openly with people you meet. It's breaking the silence that will create change, whether or not people know our personal business, they should know our convictions.

Like I said in the video, the woman who fired me was ultimately so spineless (I even pray for those folks) but it took this situation for me to see this & to re-align my own goals, however much courage it takes.

[diepiriye]

So sorry to hear that. ANd having suffered actual death threats before I got his horrible threat from a kid, I can empathize with what it feels like to be insulted like this. NO, ife would not be easier if we were all just str8. In fact, it would be boring, so just remember that and remember that there are as many progressive folks as there are spineless colleagues & admins. Plus, where one is bold enough to lead, most simply follow trends out of fear. Glad to hear you're a trend-setter!

[diepiriye]

A lot of folks suffer in that environment, but they have the monopoly in this city, and that's the really sad part. For most families, there are no other choices. And the funny thing about it is that they have violence, drugs and alcohol abuse like any other school- so their sh*t stinks, too. But, it's always easy to step on someone than to really work to create something meaningful on a grander scale. I enjoyed the kids, so I'll count those blessings and not feel cursed by the weak.

[nancynewsflash]

As a trans woman I can really relate to this. There have been many times in my life where I've given up pursuing a career working with children, because I felt as though it would be considered 'inappropriate' for me to be in such a situation (even though working with youth is the kinda work I want to do). I think that it's really unacceptable that you were dismissed from your work for doing things like opening up a dialog with your students about their thoughts around queer people.

[diepiriye]

You know the drill- I wish that someone had been there for me, like a role model. The reality is that all kids needs queer role models so no kid grows up to be the sorts of bigots we all have to deal with today! In other words, we- you and I- gotta keep on keeping on and make a way where others see none. In fact, I am very interested in starting a diversity/leadership camp so that kids stuck in schools like AES have options because there are parents who demand much more and are open minded.

[dalihendrix]

diepiriye exact past to present. brilliant.well put and said.

you have spoke from wisdom and seems experience as you describe in videos.

[diepiriye]

Thanks, that's very kind & encouraging of you to say. Like I said, this madness has weighed heavily on my mind for a while, but frankly it's a fear shared by many. If I had kept this inside, it would have continued to nag at me& defeated me. But, alas, I know in my heart that the situation was ridden with all kinds of foolishness. I know parents & teachers who feel the same, but somehow we're all trapped. It's a luxury I have to be able to stand apart from this, so I MUST speak out!

[dalihendrix]

The KKK folks are more evident and honest, but the liberals often refuse to face the fact that we all grow up with prejudice

true. I understand that very well.

seen many cool fools

[diepiriye]

I like that: Cool fools! I think liberal education has really made the world plain for these cool fools who are too scared to "do the hard work of changing & reorganizing our existing system in ways that would affirm the values of peace & love, or democracy & justice," writes bell hooks about those 'sixties radicals' turned school admins, "who found it easy to maintain radical politics when they were living on the edge," but gave up & became conservatives for the sake of money & excess.

[SpeedyBruin]

Sorry to hear you were fired from your job.

[diepiriye]

Thanks for the kind words. And like I said, we must always 'turn poison into medicine', & make these teachable moments. I even pray for the happiness of those admins who must know how poorly they regarded me in the end & after years of service.

Being fired is always unnerving, but perhaps it took that for me to recognize the lack of strength & moral character of those admins who sat & smiled as I was called upon to help them so often, & did so with delight. Hopefully others will awaken, too.

[chubbi44]

And these are the EDUCATORS!

[diepiriye]

Indeed, that's the part that feels so sour to me, beyond my own personal assault. Luckily this move finally emboldened me to speak with one of the queer high school students & remind them that the torture of silence in that environment would soon be over & that we all have the ability to construct our own worlds, despite the madness surrounding us. We all have the power to create change. Another group of students informed me of their intent to create alliances & dialogue around these issues.

[sexfanatic]

India is kinda of backwards

wasn't just awhile ago that they actually LEGALIZED homosexuality itself?

pathetic...Homophobia isn't just in Muslim Jewish or Christian nations but Hindu ones too...dear goodness

[diepiriye]

All that's true, but please know that this is an American int'l school with so-called liberal whites in all administrative positions. Please also know that the cloak of liberalism has allowed American to totally avoid an genuine discussion of difference. As we say in the deep south, it's the liberals that you have to watch out for. The KKK folks are more evident and honest, but the liberals often refuse to face the fact that we all grow up with prejudice. Might Indian schools be different?

[Steadno]

Now why are you in India again?

[diepiriye]

PhD research, and sheer curiosity and interest in the world around. AES was a favorite hustle to support me through school, and I genuinely like working with kids.

[Steadno]

Thats cool. I wish you success. My wife and I really enjoy Indian food.

[diepiriye]

Thanks for your kind wishes.