Self-Therapy & Healing Childhood Trauma (1 of 3)

[KatiDinge]

Dear Daniel, how do you feel about and what do you think about forgiving the people that are responsible for the trauma? I think one point why I am holding back my healing process is that I am afraid of not beeing able to forgive them. 'Loosing' and 'dissapointing' was part of the trauma, so this might be a vicious circle. But maybe thats not all. So what are your thoughts on forgiving if the other person will stay in denial anyway? The hardest thing is letting go.

[dmackler58]

@KatiDinge hi kati --- i'm not big on forgiveness at all. i am more into healing my own wounds and moving forward. grieving, mourning, all that. i think i have a youtube video on forgiveness somewhere.... if you search for mackler and forgiveness... also some essays about it on my website! all the best to you! daniel

[dulaney02201]

I have been journaling since I was 9 years old and it has been a great way for me to better understand myself.

[Regginyaga]

Its not like anyone thinks they shouldn't be honest to themselves

[brightoceanstar]

Thank you Daniel, this is very helpful

[Paseosinperro]

Hi Daniel, how are you? I would like to know your opinion of the world concentratios, here in Spain, in New York,.... from the perspective of the trauma. For me, even when there things which need to be said about banks or democracy, is many times a way which people express their own internal shit more than a real social concern

Jorge

[dmackler58]

@Paseosinperro hi Jorge -- i'm no sure i understand your comment... maybe you are speaking about people speaking out about the horrors of capitalism and industrialism and corporatism...when really their issue is internal -- their unresolved traumas...and they are projecting it outward onto the world and society... is that it? all the best to you --- daniel

[Paseosinperro]

@dmackler58 yes! may be I wasn`t to clear asking the cuestion.

[rockstarofredondo]

This is excellent.

[ellandelachapelle]

"Normal" comes from "norm". So you have to ask yourself in any given situation "what is the norm here?" (if you are accused of being unnormal.) In nazi-Germany it was unnormal to love Jews!

Riddle: if everyone is trying to be like everybody else, who are they trying to be like? :)

[pietrrocks]

Ive been in Berlin & meditating and it came up when i was about 16 and in the family backyard i planted some tomato plants and they were growing and i was proud. then in a rage my late father ripped them out, the rage i felt and drove it inwards, to where? he was a boxer i couldnt beat him. i still feel the world is somehow unbeatable from that and other events. i have been imagining the situation and sending it light and healing. ive healed a lot over time but its still there

[YouthFreedomFighters]

A padlock is not good enough. People can cut the part of the diary off that holds the padlock and then open it up. Its much better to use a word processor with a password for your diary.

[HarmonicMOD]

WOW This is really inspiring! Thanks for sharing :) You described my childhood too I also started writing at a very young age and have now gotten back to writing it feels really good to let it all out :)

[scotchvelo]

Hi Daniel,

I think your reflections and ideas of trauma are really, really on the mark, as are your thoughts on splitting from the traumatized self. I think many of us have trouble understanding just how terribly, terribly difficult it can be to reconnect with that split off, traumatized part of us. I've been at it for over three years, and it's a real struggle to - as you say - take the side of the child when you can't even feel it.

Great work. Thanks so much.



[budaheartie]

Hi Daniel

Fantastic work with the videos and for your own self healing, a great contribution! Much love to you barbara

[lmollot]

prevention of child sex assault with matriarchy clans of iroquois women (book)- hope for the future-lets do it

[sensorymatrix]

I agree with all that you say, and especially appreciate you pointing out that many people are so traumatized that they think they're not... cut off from themselves, justifying normal to mean healthy when it largely is not.

Wonderfully insightful, revolutionary perspective for growth...

I -3 journaling :)

[sensorymatrix]

Daniel, you're awesome. I feel like you're speaking my mind.

Thank you :)

[jruizdemena]

Hi Daniel, do you think that when you are not split off is easier to remember your dreams? If so why? do you notice it by personal experience or have you learn it on books? (Freud said that ) Im interesting in know what things about dreams are scientific proved till now

[dmackler58]

@jruizdemena i think people who are less split off tend to remember their dreams better, but not always. sometimes i have seen people who are very split off but remember their dreams, but without so much emotional content -- or have no emotional connection to their dreams at all. other people are extremely dissociated to the point of psychosis, and their psychosis IS their dream -- they live it in their waking hours. i haven't learned much about dreams in books - personal experience is better

[jruizdemena]

@dmackler58 thanks for the answer Daniel. I use to journaling and to write my dreams. Sometimes i woke up very excited from a dream and i say "lets put it in the paper" but the moment i start to write it seems like the feelings of the dream goes away (even if i still remember it) I have a few dreams written, but i dont exctly what to do with them,...

[dawnthi]

Thankyou so much for sharing the results of all of your journaling. That's amazing all of that insight that you have.

[Angelishylainey]

Feels like in different circumstances I have gone through a similar journey. I was raped, once when i was 18 & again when i was 31 after a bad marriage. I went on to finally get counselling in art college, which was in itself therapy as an artist the need to create etc. I went on to get my art degree & later learn counselling skills and journalling entered my life...I went about thinking I was better than i was for a while till I lost my health and my looks as such...I had more to work through

[Angelishylainey]

continuing...I'm still working through layers upon layers of further trauma that happened through getting ill. I was also a Reiki master and seemed to be on the wounded healer journey...trauma I passed onto my children. The learning cycles & the processes I learnt, not all great phases, I realised I will still get it wrong,trigger old stuff until i fully work through it all. This hasn't been encouraged or supported by many. I continue to recognise my patterns & causes of initial trauma. TY :o)

[Jburdo4680]

Is in the top 1% ... but still on the surface I don't hide much. Perhaps, since I like to know what I'm getting into, has provoked my brutal honesty w/ ppl... and most ppl would rather not know I guess.

[jruizdemena]

IS LIKE YOU WERE JUST DESCRIBING MY OWN HISTORY WITH MY JOURNAL!!!!

THANKS !!

[wagooairlines]

batty boi

[paraparadiddle]

This is wonderful. I applaud your work on this very honest and potentially helpful video. Bravo.

[PhatlineProduction]

thankyou for sharing this video..I love that you opened up and shared with others

[noobhealz402]

I don't really have any traumatic experiences or anything serious... But i feel like i have something that i'm hiding but i don't know that i'm actually hiding something. I thought about getting therapy so i could just talk to someone, because im VERY social, but ever since dropping all social connections due to my obsessive behavior with video games, i really have no one to talk to. So i sit here wanted to express things... I tried journaling but it doesn't really help. Eh... any ideas?

[Snyblind]

Great video. I've been using writing as therapy too sometimes, but I used to have two locks on my journalXD

[serenitykennedy]

Great stuff. Sometimes it is much easier to write what one feels rather than speak it.

[coldfreshair]

You are inspiring me. I am glad that it is possible to develop self-love facing our painful past

[aroniafly]

Hej, I am so glad that I "have found" you.

I really needed to hear what you had to say. I am on my way of recovering from neglectful childhood...i am quite old now though (57 years old) and it makes me very, very sad because... I did not found Alice Miller earlier. I never have had a therapist but when I came to insight and grief about my childhood I could begin to heal myself...I still am on this path towards enlightenment...

But I CAN SEE the needs of my grandchildren (2 toddlers).

[tzivsharet]

This video is really really helpful!!!

I've been journaling on and off for years and it encouraged me to continue!

You are awesome!

[dmackler58]

hi tzivsharet---i love journaling, oh yeah! it's been such a strong way for me to develop a healthier relationship with myself... thanks for the kind feedback----all the best, daniel

[99carissa99]

I really appreciate your openness and honesty in this video. I am in that top 1% of traumatized people because I was raped. I completely agree with you about most people being traumatized, because the parts of my childhood that troubled me before the rape are still present now, after the rape. Again, thank you for your trust and willingness to share. It is very nice to see a guy talking about his problems. I respect that

[dmackler58]

hi carissa---thanks for the comment---and that's AWFUL about being in the "top 1%". your positive feedback inspires me---not always easy to be so honest publicly! thanks---daniel

[catalunarocks]

@dmackler58 the reality is that the majority of people are highly traumatized - 1 out of 3 girls will be raped or sexually abused by the age of 18 ,and 1 out of 5 boys - and those are only the ones that are reported. it's unfortunately the norm in our culture, but trauma is trauma, be it growing up in an alcoholic home, or sexual abuse, or any trauma, it is harmful on many levels, and the inner child needs to be healed and nurtured to heal the trauma.

[kuuuuul20]

i can relate to every single word you say in this vid..

where were you all these years??

thanks a lot..

[dmackler58]

dig it---thanks kuuuuuul20

glad you enjoyed it-

daniel

p.s. you asked where i was all these years. my answer: thinking these thoughts i share here, but too scared to be public with them...at least in video form.

[reVerse2bfree]

This is a wonderfully helpful video. Your honest personalised approach to self-healing and healing childhood trauma is immeasurable! Thank you

[dmackler58]

thank you!