Chuck Norris Facts

[RustyKnight94]

If i had a dollar for every fact i had now, i could make microsoft look like hobos.

[dota1pro]

when my comment become top comment i would like to thank chuck norris cos he told me to make it become top........chuck norris!!!!!!!!!!!!nooo dont smash my on keyboasdaszxcvasdasdqwexzcgasd­qweasdsqweweqeqzxcczxczxcxzvcx­vcxvcxasdasdwqe

oh god i still survive!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!­!!

[Hardzrule21]

In the world war two Nuclear Bombings in Japan, the nuclear bomb was actually Chuck Norris.

No wonder Japan surrendered in that time.

[mnavariass]

Chuck Norris fears Charles Bronson.

[sanfe13mc]

As a joke chuck pee on an 18 weller today you know that 18 weller as optamis prime

Chuck norris breakfast consist of 2 dozen eggs 1 pound of black coffee a pound of raw bacon and a kilo of pure colombian cokcane he put it all in a blender then in a Cringe and injects straight into his neck

[DMCTheOnly111]

if chuck norris is so amsome i dare him to come to my house and slam my head on the keybfefiherfjdsD hj348ehsjbdhsvgfuveo bngrhdg

[NinjaGonnaGetcha]

Chuck Norris makes it rain with 100 dollar bills.

[kaislaer]

Chuck Norris still uses megaupload to download files

[ssaelens]

They tried making a chuck Norris brand toilet paper..but it wouldn't take sh!t from no one

[zahmad007]

The Nazis surrender to the United States on May 7th, 1945. Chuck Norris was born on May 6th, 1945. Coincidence, I think not.

[bigdavro]

Chuck Norris has a guardian angel. Its Chuck Norris!

[TheMossfan84]

Chuck norris made it threw all levels in zombies on blops jus by knifing no gins lmfao

[darkmaster943]

chuck norris went on mw3 survival, got to wave 50 alone, then bought a gun

[moofotv]

Chuck Norris threw up a grenade and killed 100 people. then the grenade exploded

[avencastcastrocks]

Kids wear super man pj pants well,superman wears Chuck Norris pj pants

[mysecretidentity9]

Who gets to you first if you insult Chuck Norris by calling him uglier than Candlejac

[HumbyGames]

They named a street after Chuck Norris, but had to rename it because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.

[EDGEacc]

FACT 2543256452863624: Chuck Norris jokes are lame and overdone.

[ompmega]

I bet SOPA can't shut down chuck norris's website that is full of illigal content

[agdrilo]

Chuck Norris still uses Megaupload...even when the FBI shut it down a few hours ago, this dosen´t apply to him!!!!

[TheKINGOFDUDE]

Chuck Norris is jesus nuff said

[Badgaldinger]

The BFG 9000 is the only known weapon capable of killing Chuck Norris. However, all working models of the weapon were lost during the Mars incident, and no attempt to reproduce them has been made since.

[XxBooksackxX]

Chuck Norris will veto the SOPA bill.

Chuck Norris can delete the Recycle Bin.

[koopachalupa]

these keyboard jokes are almost as bad as those damn arrow in the knee jokes

[Mapletendo]

Fuck i can't believe they say this sh*t about chuck norris, if he would be that awesome he would come into my house and smash my head into the keyboarsnfvhiuabblwebcklabsdic­puqwveusww

[TheFoamingElmo]

it is a scientific fact the grand canyon was made 60 million years ago when Chuck Norris round-house kicked the earth

[Scar666Ali]

Chuck Norris is a dickhead.

[dat1guywitdat1name]

@Scar666Ali he knows where u live

[Scar666Ali]

@dat1guywitdat1yeh, shaking in my boots.

[TheLegorocks1234]

If Chuck Norris is such a badass he would come up behind me and smash me against the keybuwiykhgfiuwekajh'

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[arakosta1]

We are now in 70 AC (After chuck), not 2012.

[mysecretidentity9]

@arakosta1 Great, that gives us 1942 years more to exist?

[rvladovic]

chuck norris drinking water from  faucet on ex :D

[xXxPr0nxXx]

R.I.P 298 people

[Pythonn19]

Chuck Norris can dislike anything he wants. You got a problem with it, go tell him.

[UtubeVideosss]

In the 2008 Olympics, chuck Norris won the 400 freestyle not because he was a quick swimmer but because the water moved out of the way from Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris simply walked the 400 meters.

[tpain2345]

Oh cmon, Chuck Norris is just a stupid actor!!!! If he was so good he'd come to my house and slam my face on the keyboarlasdnfamnsc0918ehhwqeio­j0jiorm;/k;ljr23ERGZDF798j34fp­a';/;9203jN

IFQM304T/ALM;lsdmfoiamm9nqawel­;mwr4

[Lasdosconzeta]

@tpain2345 you made my day

[prisonbreak7775]

@tpain2345 that joke is in every fucking video of chuck norris

[Rabidmonkey0308]

When Jesus returns the first person he'll visit will be Chuck Noris. , Chuck Noris is the only man who ever got a free ticket to heaven, now he comes and goes as he pleases. ,Chuck Noris doesn't cook food, he simply stares at it in rage until it cooks its self. I'll be back with more jokes I made.

[Rabidmonkey0308]

I made up one "when god has trouble deciding if someone should go to heaven or hell...he asks Chuck Noris."

[xwiNtz]

Chuck norris didn't made mistakes while reading the facts. you just heard it wrong.

[manovrsb]

chuck norris took an arrow to the knee...the arrow died.

[amantoske]

chuck norris doesn't use condoms because he doesnt like rubber burning

[UtubeVideosss]

297 gonna get killed by chuck norris

[Hem3fiction]

When Chuck Norris sends me a text, the screen cracks

[tmannpd7290]

Chuck Norris can rate 6 stars.

[Andreaspaw]

Chuck Norris can rate 5 stars on videos on Youtube even with the new layout.

[jakeencpd]

Fuck chuck



[KLUSTUR]

Chuck Norris likes videos where the audio is in sync with the video. You made Chuck Norris mad.

[irinack]

297 people have died and the other 1,692,888 people who watched this video but didn't hit the like button have been visited by Chuck Norris in their dream.

[RachBell90]

Chuck Norris is the only guy that can eat a banana and not look gay

[cimbom552]

Chuck Norris can give Tylenol a headache

[owenshark24]

Chuck norris has already been to mars,thats why theres no signs of life.

[TheFair48]

Chuck Norris's fist can all cross, even time and space

[SeddincY]

Truly,,made my day...

[dragoscorca]

I disliked this video and a second later my pc caught fire xD

[MrBoesen]

Hah! Chuck Norris is a complete pussy. If he is truly the ultimate, badass god people claim him to be, then he would come to my house right now, kick open my office door, and slam my head against the keybonfai;lenmae;nfmalnefaekfn­­aejk;mfweof;mwelnfawalen;dwae­f­nm;oedamweafm;wolenfmlakmfjk­am­fl;ansfmsladmfc;sdmaflamfif­emj­ewang/amwsfil;ajhgasfmioer­]jna­g;ahfm;ojaigf]jfaf;ija'fw­ofew

[MrMeatBall100]

So horribly out of sync :P

[chrisbenjy]

Chuck Norris can peel oranges with his eyes... but Chuck Norris doesn't need to peel oranges because the orange shits it and peels itself.

[TheWuzzy]

Chuck Norris does not use toilet paper. He uses 6" by 8" pieces of plyboard.

[prep2die]

follow on twitter for facts you probably didn't know- twitter.com/#!/IsThat_AFact

[TheAngryPanda7]

We watch how to survive an alien abduction. Aliens watch how to survive a chuck norris abduction.

[VvDOPAMEANvV]

Fuck Chuck! Dusty sent me here.

[monkeypooflinger1000]

on Halloween superheros dress up as chuck norris

[TheEXpothead]

Chuck Norris can lick the backside of the universe.

[WOWweirdnfeared]

chuck norris went to the virgin islands. now there called the islands

[Scourgeandmephiles93]

God forsakens his sins to Chuck Norris.

[thunderstudent]

There is no death, there is only Chuck Norris

[arakosta1]

I bet chuck norris can't hit me with the keyboardjsahcjkhdzljcasdhjcnxa­sm,.dncasjd hasdhsahcxalsjkdhiowuq;e12iojd­salkd

[MrStoneClark]

This video was in 1080p, but Chuck Norris beat it down to 240p with a nasty wink hold

[hydr4t1x]

CHUCK NORRIS ONCE TRIED TO SUCK BRUCE LEES BALL but his head blew up

[hydr4t1x]

chuck norris once tried to suck bruce lees balls but his head exploded

[bigguy228]

Chuck Norris ran into the Titanic, that's the real reason why it sunk.

[ItsMeJeff08]

Chuck Norris can make fire by rubbing 2 ice cubes.

[wareshful]

chuck norris can hit you with a parked car

[NinjaPaige101]

What the heck is so special about Chuck Norris? If he was really a "god" he would come to my house and smack my head to the keyboarjskskfkfksqqwptbchv wh

Dswlaot

[TheDestroyerComics]

292 bruce lees disliked this, and i'm okay with that

[theseventhson95]

Chuck Norris is a stupid guy. If he was so cool and goddish he would teleport behind my back , right now and would be wacking my head on the keyboardkejgfkwenwejdo2iufjsmn­chjkaldfhndsuxhcnmegrtjhrg

[FishlipsMalone]

Chuck Norris NEVER had to pay tax! he TAX you with a roundhouse kick against the authorities!

[issemayhem]

@FishlipsMalone Pay a tax?

You mean "pay taxes"

[Uptizz]

the only reason there is 8 billion people living on Earth, is because chuck norris allows you to live.

[IMfam0us1]

chuck norris is so overratedmjunhlidfebnlibn;rgbe­rigbenk;gklrjnge;lrkjngr;lekn6­l;

[herpsandinverts123]

Chuck Norris has a bear rug in his house.Its not dead, its just afraid to move.

[mowglu1]

I disliked this video and.........

one sec someone is at my door.

[issemayhem]

@mowglu1 And He havent disliked it again :)

[HentMas]

@mowglu1 OMG MOWGLU! I ALWAY WONDERED WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU, now i know... poor poor bastard :S

[DJojakka]

if Chuck Norris was what everyones saying he would come to my house and smash my head to the keyboarddkisanfbapidnvDNUAP92U­3+1,dklaxzz.--.zxsad

[ParanormalParaquad]

Chuck Norris's favorite food isn't squash....it's pineapple.

[thedoctor69able]

hes gay he went out with my uncle for a couple of months,my uncle broke it off coz chuck is terrible in bed the word sloppy was used?

[Angusrox01]

chuck norris listends too here comes the boom when he sit's on the toilet

[betawolf56]

Chuck Norris does not sweat. He forces the air around him to cry and uses its tears to cool himself.

[amiel10hope]

Eminem sang "I'm Not Afraid" and Chuck Norris said "I like the way you lie"..

[legopivotboy]

chuck norris is gay he sucks ballsjdiuuuuuudpofahpkglasjfaa­jjbljhujhyhhhhiy7/fmvojdsjfnhe­whjfvgednvgjfdnbvjdnfbjdncbndf­jnbdjkfnlkdbnfknbdlgfnbkfgnbfg­mnkn;xknbdp'svbgfdhhhhnyjuuuuu­uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu­uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu­uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu­uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu­uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu­uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu­uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu­uuuujnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnjl­o

[SuperNintendoGameboy]

There's no Ctrl Key on Chuck Norris's Keyboard. Chuck Norris is ALWAYS in control!

[Hippiemongoose]

chuck norris is soo stupid!!!! if he was so great he would teleport to my house and slam my head on the keybohijfjkhgfavgczkbxgj

[XLUpLoaderXL]

whatever you say he still got his ass handed to him by bruce lee....

[anonimac86]

@XLUpLoaderXL Thats why he died in mysterious death! :D

[CaliberIsnxt]

Chuck Norris is Legendary!

Chuck Norris is a Hero!

Chuck Norris is a Patriot!

Chuck Norris is a Warrior! Chuck Norris is a Sex-Beast!

Chuck Norris is Alpha.

Chuck Norris is Divine.

Chuck Norris is Supreme.

Chuck Norris is a Titan. Chuck Norris...Is a GOD!

shit....I tried to speak ill of Chuck Norris...but my computer... WOULDN'T LET ME!

[fifalover1234]

Lol jokes Chuck Norris... Who is he?? :L

[fifalover1234]

Chuk noris

[CaliberIsnxt]

@fifalover1234 DONT U DARE!.. DONT U EVER DARE!!!!!! DONT YOU EVER SPELL THAT MANS NAME WRONG..... EVER!!!!

[xG4m3rJ4m3z]

Onions don't make Chuck Norris cry, he makes onions cry! :)

[Barnakos]

Chuck Norris can do the Jedi strangulation

[Barnakos]

Chuck Norris Heights exactly one Chuck Norris long

[Barnakos]

Chuck Norris can Throw a ball to himself, around the earth.

[Barnakos]

Chuck Norris's tears can cure cancer. But Chuck Norris has never cried

[ReMedyTeh]

@Barnakos why u copied it ?

[NobleFlamestar]

I dont believe that if u mispell Chuk Noris that u have 5 seconds left to li-

[PallaAlBalzo93]

Grande Chuck! --- Great Chuck!

[ElChapoGuzman69]

Chuck Norris is a Fucking N***R

[reprovo]

Chuck Norris can ping without a network connection.

[swadlol]

Once a blind man stepped on Chuck Norris' foot and Chuck Norris said "Don't you know who I am?" and the sound of Chuck Norris' voice cured the mans blindness.

Unfortunately, the first and last thing he ever saw was a fatal roundhouse kick to the head.

[SNESguy1992]

Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.

People wear SuperMan pajamas, SuperMan wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

Chuck Norris grew a beard at 18...seconds.

[crustymeatflaps]

chuck norris was born in the hospital he built.

chuck norris can win connect four in only 3 moves.

jesus walks on water, chuck norris swims through land

the dinosaurs owed chuck norris money, they never paid him back.

[DarkPall9]

these jokes suck. greek chuck norris jokes are fucking awesome!!!!!

[Gunnerwhynot]

This video is only 240p because Chuck Norris allows it to be

[Scar666Ali]

chuck Norris can breast feed.

[Terzday12]

Chuck Norris sucks! He's just a stupid actor! If he was soooo great why doesnt he come to my house and smash my head in my keyboarghbnjkm, hbgvfc ghjgfdfgvhbnjkmn bgvfdcfgbnhgfrderftgyhnjhgfcdf­vgbhnjgfcxszsxdcfvgbnmnb vcxzsxdfgbhj

[gsmaster42]

@Terzday12 not funny anymore

[theitaliankid05]

Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter

[hinata355]

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding !

[Wofoeh8001]

a horse said to Chuck norris that Chuck is gay and loves Justin Bieber and thats how the giraffes where born

But seriously CHUCK NORRIS IS GhgvbuifengjiefnvfbyquifcHBVCS­BDHFVHFVDIHSBAFFHUDHFJAUIFJDIO­HWYHFIODNBGJPHDISAopgjiofjgosh­oigjoifdspofgisb\gipfbgsoipjgi­ngfuisehgfud nb IM NOT FUCKING GAY asshole

[Relossz]

Chuck norris just too fast his voice can't catch up with him.

[iceres89]

I swear I am a golden labrador that can type english if fed a treat for 60 seconds, and thar's greater than what chuck norris does ruf ruf ruf ruf ruf ruf ruf ruf ruf ruf ruf ruf ruf ruf ruf

(one hour later)

The sentence above is written by his owner

Hey guys I'm that labrador again! If chuck norris exists i challeng him to a keyboard battlekgjvjsigsjeigjsivjsgihis­uwhgsjhgsjfllfdfngdgfyhjulofgb­djhkerhokeoh'dhlnd;lhdkfd;hkod­hkldeohk,nfjnhdxhnksgvksdlk(ke­yboard malfunction)nrdfjhnvggedhhf

[mebagtilay41287]

Chuck Norris can sneeze while his eyes open

[Rustyy444]

Chuck Norris once went on an adventure with a bow and some arrows. Everyone that got in his way now works as a town guard in Skyrim.

[Mark2790]

Time and tide wait for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.

[TheGuitarMan4Ever]

Moses separate the sea. Chuck Norris separate Moses.

[sergi9393]

those 291 man are dead.

[CrazyDude862]

chuck norris can jump off the tallest building in the world and land on his pinkie finger without getting hurt

[spacemaster911]

Chuck Norris isn't all great like we all say he is, he is just someone who does karate. Oh wait, someone's at my door. shflkahafjjkdasjfhkhalfhdjhhfd­jfhsfjhaytaejfhajahfhlahslfhld­hlahlhfahilflahiohifalfhhskjfa­urjjrijio123uyrnjkfhuhafkjijoy­^Ty&&&&kfjskajfjadjj

[2bad4u100]

the audio is delayed because chuck roundhouse kicked it back in time

[unborn1999]

Another fact chuck Norris used to have a truck it became octamus prime

[Greghun100]

1000 THUMBS UP FOR CHUCK NORRIS

[TruePS3Fan]

chuck norris can take an arrow in the knee and still be an adventurer

[funkyfish8025]

Jesus can walk on water but chuck Norris can swim trough land

[guigasmattos]

Chuck norris does bungee jumping without the rope

[galarbage]

Why doesn't Chuck Norris tell jokes? Because you'l actualy laugh to death !

[mokosamtomAS]

i fuckin hate that people make the exact same joke about chuck norris slaming there faces into the keyboard its just stupid.

are you blind enough to make the exact same joke?

[CDawgIZBeast]

Chuck Norris is the resson Waldo is hiding

[mba4829029]

Top 11. ChuCK Norris is GAY

[gb74wa]

Chuck Norris doesn't eat honey,he chews bees...

[stinger1985]

If Chuck Norris was so awesome, he would show up at my house and slam my face on the keyboaath;khjpifwnjhlja'sbmkls­jthwuhjsa;bnadjbh

[bananna6555555]

@stinger1985 *shakes head* 

[ieyedmonster]

this is the greatest chuck norris joke ever when chuck norris mother gave birth to him he ate the placenta and killed his mother

[bm2309]

ahahah Chuck Norris is the best!

[riddleman65]

Chuck Norris is a retarded creationist and shitty actor.

[Sermed1231]

@riddleman65

Hahaha you shall wait for his apperence

[mattybartos]

@riddleman65 he's now coming for you while you sleep

[riddleman65]

@mattybartos

No, he's not. He's sitting at home being a shitty actor, believing in retarded shit like 6 day creationism. He's a fucking idiot, and he's not going to come for me.

[bananna6555555]

Oh come on!!! Chuck Norris is just a stupid actor. If he's good, he would come to my house and slap my head to the keyboarjdsflaheiuty84q3er4whqe­4wnmqgprieqt4giu4q398g4q38gugp

[ininjablade2]

i gave this a thumbs up coz if i gave it a thumbs down chuck norris would of ripped off my thumbs

[bluecarpet12345]

lol who the fuck gets tired of reading chuck norris facts

its so damn funny

[Metaldudehere]

when chuck norris gets pulled over, the cop gets a ticket

[ODSTDeltaSquad]

Justin Bieber, Hitler and Chuck Norris are in hell and are sent to the devil. the devil is there in a throne.

Devil: Why are you here?

Hitler: I started a holocaust on the jewish population.

Devil: what about you?

Bieber: I tried to sing with a chipmunk voice.

Devil: (looks at Chuck) And you?

Chuck Norris: Get off my throne, or else.

[mokosamtomAS]

@ODSTDeltaSquad you stole that joke from a DIO joke,bitch

[cl1pco]

@ODSTDeltaSquad capy&paste more?

[iAntiswag]

CHUCK NORRIS IS STUPID!!!!! HE IS NOT STRONG OR COOL OR AWESOME!!!! if we was sooo amazing he would come to my house and smack my head against my keybrasdjgsdgdfbnsadsfgrhugdfh­kvgnsdfgrh