As a 50/50 bisexual, I perfectly understand what you're saying so well. Because:
A. I'm turned on by many aspects of guys, but not anal; I prefer other sexual practices.
B. This will sound shallow, but the problem with lifelong relationships is that I'm only sexually turned on by young, skinny, good-looking twinks in their 20's (like you, my hot, naughty boy!!!) - at least several years younger than me. Older, fat men physically repulse me. Sorry, it's the way I am.
Hi Eric, just discovered your vids now jan 5 /12 . I think some who have commented on this vid need to check out your encounter in Germany vid :-) being gay is not always about sex and not always being about sex does not change the fact of being gay.
Your comments resonate so much with me. As a masculine in the closet 50 yo I've often thought similarly about the issues that you have raised. Thank goodness for YouTube, it enables me to connect with like minded people that I don't usually have an
(part 7) Did u know the companions of Jesus loved Jesus more than their wives? Gandhi had followers loving him more than their wives. There are many cases where sometimes man love another man more than a woman. That is brotherhood love and it does not mean you have to force yourself to follow the 'norm' (ie: having sex) just because u love somebody. I sincerely hope all gays (sincere love for brothers and not for lust) find the distinction and settle the confusion they might have. Thanx!! (end)
(part5)...and i humbly and personally think u might be confused with love in the name of brotherhood with natural love between man and woman. Though i am not in your shoes, I hope you can explore this idea, look at other societies internationally, and not just within your circle. Might be sex is the main drilling mechanism in 'western' countries, however please explore other circles of international soceity and how they perceive liking another man and how they manage this. (to part 6)
(part4) When i mention, things are created to be put at its proper place, eg. Man has the sexual tool that is compatible with a lady. It also matches, physically, emotionally, spritually and sexually (find the right woman, this will happen) at all level of age and times despite the circumstances. Getting married is not all about sex, its more to that, we will all realize when we grow older, 50s,60s,70s,80s etc. I understand you are trying to find meaning and reason for how u feel..(to part 5)
(part3)Men do share heart to heart talk, play soccer together, drink together, study together and share life's most beloved moments together and this also constitute what is called brotherhood love. I understand u feel uncomfortable doing sexual activities. Liking another man does not mean you have to enforce sex desire on another man. It is ohkeh not to do it. Things are normally created to be put at its proper place. Men will feel most natural sexually with a woman (to part 4)
(part2) However, this bond between men does not have to constitute into a sexual relationship. It is important to make a clear distinction between love between men(brotherhood love) and love for a woman. Sometimes u may feel u are in love with a man, that is your brotherhood love. All men have em, depends on the society u live in. That is why guys always flock together. They are friends. Men generally appear fierce and rugged, but there are alot more in other countries that are milder.(topart3)
(Part 1)Dear Sir, I understand your confusion on many thing and things do not fit naturally. Dear sir, have u encountered love in the name of brotherhood? To me, it is a kind of love for another male, that is based on admirance, and enjoy working together, or having close and good conversation, things guys would do together in a brotherly way. I would express those as brotherhood love. Close friendship, based on trust. (To be continued -- part 2)
Sorry but..when you said " I've tried somethings" and gave that dirty little smile I LMAO - Cutest thing ever.
On a serious note: Great video! - touched on important topics not often dealt with. You're so right about the gay club thing. Im out but still feel really uncomfortable joining an alliance club at my university. Idk it really just doesn't appeal to me. I dont want to make my being gay a club thing. I know these orgs help but I feel like joining reduces perception of me to 1 aspect.
You are such a wise man for your age! I'm proud to count you among my associates & hopefully friends. I'm 48 (yea an old man) but it has taken me a much longer time than it has for you to learn these lessons.
I hope that in your life time (I think it will be) that gay equality will be the norm and not the exception. You're lucky enough to have grown up in this time frame, just keep the torch going like you are!
@castlevue Thank you! It does seems that as time passes more and more people realize that the right thing is to treat gay people with respect. I do think a few decades from now things will be quite different than they are today!
Very good info about things I think of as well. I can relate totally. Thank you for being so honest in your videos, and keep up the good work! I've only been out for a little over 2 years and still face problems like this.
Rick, honestly I don't know how you do it. Watching you work your way through some pretty emotional feelings about being gay is absolutely refreshing. And so informative(!!), to gays of all ages that are in a similar place emotionally. For there are 20yr olds and 50yr olds that are going through similar phases of coming out and discovering what being gay means to them. Please know how fortunate you are to be going through them at your age - and not in your 40s, 50s, or even 60s! But no mat
I love these honet videos you make. I empathise with much that you say. Very obviously gay people used to intimidate me (and can still do occasionally) before I realised it was their confidence with their sexuality that scared me and not them themselves (and maybe some jealousy mixed in as well). With the mariage thing, I'm sure that getting into a long-term relationship would change your concerns over being married to a man at 50 (not that I have been in a l.t.relationship myself).
I am a girl but I can relate... I'm homosexual but heteroemotional. I want a husband and kids, but I feel zero attraction to the male body... This is bullshit. Stupid f*cking brain! :( What should I do?
Yeaaaa that's true ... that 50 years old thing is true too cause you won't stay a twink with flat abs for good neither your partner ... I guess love is the key to solve this problem ... if you happen to fall in love with a girl then let it go further .. sometimes when I joke around with myself :D I think I should marry a lesbian :D:D:D:D<3 Like I said it's a joke but there are some aspects of reality in it !!!!!!!
As far as your comment about feeling how you feel about being married to another guy or letting your family know about said marriage, I think that as you get older, your thinking will evolve into living your life for you and those who make it worth living. That's how it happened for me, and I think you're WAAAY ahead of where I was at your age. :-)
I once again would like to commend you for having the courage to be yourself and make videos about the things that truly represent how you feel. There are others who feel the same way, and I'm sure you already know you're speaking to them and helping them to gain courage that they may not currently have. As an African-American male, when I was your age, there was a general shame of being gay. Even the best, most well-mannered gay folks were still seen as horrible by others.
so young yet so wise, i am now in my late 40's and sex is not really at the top of list any more, just hanging out talking being together and cuddling up is fine with me, I would love to be able to marry the man I love.
Terrific video about our gay lives. Albert Einstein once said "The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious" . Each new encounter we have begins mysteriously and progresses to affection, kissing, seduction, stimulation sexual adventure and even a short term relationship or even longer. Any of these stages are beautiful within themselves and they go where they are going to go. We can't control it. Oral sex for the first few encounters then more if both agree.
i no it will sound funny but sex bores me like i cant just do one position i have to switch a bunch and do like every position in five mins or i get bored and i have trouble getting fucked it hurt so bad the first time but when i actually made it work with the guy i love (didnt work with the douche ex) but still it was uncomfortable for me we couldnt find a postion i was comfortable in and it doesnt help that my man can last literally hours
Really good video. I have never been in a relationship or had sex, so the entire idea both frustrates me and makes me uncomfortable. I find I don't really belong anywhere; not in the straight world and not in the gay world. And I went through the whole uncomfortable with being gay bit, and now I'm just apathetic.
Eric, you seem to touch on subjects that other gay vlogers do not, and I think you do a wonderful job. I know I could be very comfortable sitting down to a conversation with you. Also, I like where you are recording your vlogs. It's very peaceful and the sunset was a nice touch.
@alaninnh My goal is to speak about true thoughts and feelings that many gay people find themself facing. Of course, most of it is based upon my experiences and feelings. I think this approach is the best way to connect with my viewers and to help some people out.
all people have attractions...even straigh men find other men attractive but we live in a society where its not ok to have those type of feeling and if you do you are "GAY" What you have been trying things....NOOOOOOOOOO Now you cant wear white on your wedding night..
Great vid topic :). I understand what you are talking about when it comes to the apprehension about certain things. When I walk around with my bf I sometimes feel weird and think people are staring when they are not. It's just something I will have to grow out of (the feeling, not the relationship lol)
@IDH2008 Yes, various aspects of being gay just take some time to get used to. I suspect I might also feel as though people are watching me once I am out and about with a boyfriend one day. But with time that feeling show fade away.
I feel what you're saying.The normal thing is a trap. The only form of normality available to a gay person is to be gay. After all the alternative is to be a closet case. Marcus Bachmann certainly doesn't appear normal to me. As for the sexual attraction, I was worried a lot about growing older with a guy because I am mainly attracted only to young guys. But here I am in my mid fifties and with the same guy for 25 years, and we're still doin' it, and I still like it with him.
@abmindprof I agree about Marcus Bachmann. That is good to hear about your relationship. I have also found that as I've grown from a young teen to a young adult the things I find attractive in a guy have changed an evolved.
SO, when you're 50, be married to a 30 year old. Just kidding. You make some very good points, though. Unless you semiscripted, it's amazing how well it flowed.
@badger5402 When I film my videos I don't script before hand. I have a general topic in mind that I want to speak about and then speak off the top of my head. I think this is the best way for me to connect with my viewers. I do of course resay things if I feel like I didn't get my point across or if I feel like I could have said it better.
Very wise and insightful. Sex seems a lot more important in your 20's than later on. Marriage is not for everyone (divorce rate for straights tells us that). But wanting it will be determined by finding the "one" you love so much you can't imagine living apart from them. Sex is a part of what we do not who we are as a person. Regarding male attraction I love that straights have come up with the term Bro-mance to describe being attracted another straight male. They are just jeolous. :-)
Thats very good advice. Also, as you grow older, the issues you face as a gay man will change as well. It's hard to describe, but as you age people treat you different. Theres alot of discrimination based on age and it really sucks. I'm going to do a video about that soon. People can be so cruel at times.
Some of these things just don't need to be worried about. We tend to be attracted to men our own age, even if we do admire a hot young body. Don't worry about getting married! There's plenty of time for that after you have met someone you want to spend your life with, and he will have the characteristics you want, which may or may not be just as 'straight-acting' as you. And WHAT you do with another man will matter less as WHO you do it with matters more.
when I was in my 20's I thought the same thing about being married to an older man as you mentioned. But now, 20 years later *I know* I have been with the same guy for 16 years. I still see in him the same person he was when we were both 26. Even though we are older we have matured together like a fine wine and I still see that same cute and it isn't weird at all at 42. So, just give yourself some time you will be surprised how you will grow and change over time. :)
Eric I'm just like you in that I used to think I'd only have oral sex. I'm 21 and the thought of getting married to another guy weirds me out as well. So good to hear it from someone else! But I also think it's because society has conditioned us to think that anything outside of the cookie-cutter heterosexual lifestyle is abnormal. I like to think that if you know what makes you happy then whatever you're confused about is irrelevant or will come together in the end :-)
@FastMovinTrain I'm not weirded out by the thought of marrying a gay, rather thought of me being married to another man seems weird. Although, I suspect, if I find someone nice, it'll happen. I hope it happens. You're right about being conditioned and about the last peice of your advice.
@FastMovinTrain Everyone should listen to dan savage's podcast 'savage love' he effortlessly makes his listeners less weirded out by stuff. Where else do you have an advice collumnist field questions about people setting up a 4 way relationship with various gender mixes without batting an eyelid...
Very good topic, I remember telling a good friend of mine who is also gay that the way that I am makes a lot of things about being gay that much harder lol. I just hope that as I keep going I start getting used to it as well.
First I love the sun in the background. For me I went through a stage of wanting to be the gay image that is portrayed and I'm finding out that even though experimenting isn't wrong eventually what I need to also do is just be myself! Then when I search for love I don't have to worry the other guy isn't getting the real me. Liked your topic today.
UGH!! Our society is so messed up when it comes to human sexuality!! My partner Dave and I have been together for 20 years. I suppose we would classify ourselves as "masculine?" Who knows..OR who cares!! All I know is that we have had a BLAST!!!! I hope people realize that just because you are gay you do not have to go through life alone. TRUST ME!! I have been on both sides of the fence on this issue and this SHORT life is much more fun exploring it with someone you love... :)
@jimbobubbadj Ah Geez..my last name is "STONE"..When AOL was so popular there were no "stone" names..thus I am "stoner".....I feel so sorry for gay kids..I still have PTSD from growing up gay in our society... PLEASE..let it get better for the next generation!!! Let's hope.. There is no "choice"..we are who we are... Jim
Its completely normal to be uncomfortable around what you are not used to. Of course you would feel uncomfortable around feminine guys. It's because you have not yet had much interaction with them. Same goes for if you are Buddhist and you attend church for the first time. Of course you would be uncomfortable because you are not used to church practices. I think a large amount of suppose masculine guys misconstrue this as hate simply because they're not used to it yet. much more to this topic..
I love this one a lot. My problem is that i want a relationship with a guy but when the opportunity comes for a relationship, i get scared and chicken out. Any advice would be appreciated.....:)
@kjpgt1991 I'm not sure that I'd be the best person to give you advice about this issues. I've also not been in a relationship yet. Perhaps another viewer could leave you some advice.
It's nice that you talk about this sort of stuff, because truly, there are a lot of people who seem to feel that way, and that's OK, I also used to feel unsure about the whole lgbtq world a few years ago, but now I guess that I'm a lot more comfortable about my sexuality, nevertheless sometimes I still feel a bit awkward =/, nevertheless great vid! and beautiful bg =)
@HRHrMegafan It's extremely common, of course, to be unsure about a lot of things when it comes to our sexuality and who we are emotionally attracted to. And I also know that it is just as common to have feelings of akwardness about it.
YES, you are so right .. I know what you're talking about.
I'm bi, well actually pan, but more into women.
I can totally see myself marrying another woman.. actually I want a family - I want four kids and a loved one - I don't care about their gender at all!
Right now I'm with a wonderful guy, and of course he knows I'm out & proud.
Me accepts that I'm joining pride festivals, going to gay bars and that I support the lgbtq group openly and plan to raise my (our, maybe) kids tolerant.
I am Bi but more into guys than girls. For me anal sex scares the hell out of me. When I think about it there is this really weird uncomfortable feeling that comes over me that say's "you're not going to like it" Yet i love ass, male or female a good ass is all I need LOL!!.. Thanks! Good VId!!
@CatotheCensor1 I think many guys an girls have a large range of concerns when it comes to being gay or bisexual or whatever. I wanted to talk about some of the personal concerns that I've felt.
I can totally relate to this. Love him! :)
Shanemoon87 2 weeks ago
As a 50/50 bisexual, I perfectly understand what you're saying so well. Because:
A. I'm turned on by many aspects of guys, but not anal; I prefer other sexual practices.
B. This will sound shallow, but the problem with lifelong relationships is that I'm only sexually turned on by young, skinny, good-looking twinks in their 20's (like you, my hot, naughty boy!!!) - at least several years younger than me. Older, fat men physically repulse me. Sorry, it's the way I am.
AntimatterSemen 1 month ago
Cont...... Opportunity to connect with - all the best to you :-)
activeharmonic 2 months ago
Hi Eric, just discovered your vids now jan 5 /12 . I think some who have commented on this vid need to check out your encounter in Germany vid :-) being gay is not always about sex and not always being about sex does not change the fact of being gay.
Your comments resonate so much with me. As a masculine in the closet 50 yo I've often thought similarly about the issues that you have raised. Thank goodness for YouTube, it enables me to connect with like minded people that I don't usually have an
activeharmonic 2 months ago
Hey Eric A Gay Collab is looking for a Friday person - you would be a good fit - send them one of your vids
b4804514 3 months ago
(part 7) Did u know the companions of Jesus loved Jesus more than their wives? Gandhi had followers loving him more than their wives. There are many cases where sometimes man love another man more than a woman. That is brotherhood love and it does not mean you have to force yourself to follow the 'norm' (ie: having sex) just because u love somebody. I sincerely hope all gays (sincere love for brothers and not for lust) find the distinction and settle the confusion they might have. Thanx!! (end)
son4t4 3 months ago
(part5)...and i humbly and personally think u might be confused with love in the name of brotherhood with natural love between man and woman. Though i am not in your shoes, I hope you can explore this idea, look at other societies internationally, and not just within your circle. Might be sex is the main drilling mechanism in 'western' countries, however please explore other circles of international soceity and how they perceive liking another man and how they manage this. (to part 6)
son4t4 3 months ago
(part4) When i mention, things are created to be put at its proper place, eg. Man has the sexual tool that is compatible with a lady. It also matches, physically, emotionally, spritually and sexually (find the right woman, this will happen) at all level of age and times despite the circumstances. Getting married is not all about sex, its more to that, we will all realize when we grow older, 50s,60s,70s,80s etc. I understand you are trying to find meaning and reason for how u feel..(to part 5)
son4t4 3 months ago
(part3)Men do share heart to heart talk, play soccer together, drink together, study together and share life's most beloved moments together and this also constitute what is called brotherhood love. I understand u feel uncomfortable doing sexual activities. Liking another man does not mean you have to enforce sex desire on another man. It is ohkeh not to do it. Things are normally created to be put at its proper place. Men will feel most natural sexually with a woman (to part 4)
son4t4 3 months ago
(part2) However, this bond between men does not have to constitute into a sexual relationship. It is important to make a clear distinction between love between men(brotherhood love) and love for a woman. Sometimes u may feel u are in love with a man, that is your brotherhood love. All men have em, depends on the society u live in. That is why guys always flock together. They are friends. Men generally appear fierce and rugged, but there are alot more in other countries that are milder.(topart3)
son4t4 3 months ago
(Part 1)Dear Sir, I understand your confusion on many thing and things do not fit naturally. Dear sir, have u encountered love in the name of brotherhood? To me, it is a kind of love for another male, that is based on admirance, and enjoy working together, or having close and good conversation, things guys would do together in a brotherly way. I would express those as brotherhood love. Close friendship, based on trust. (To be continued -- part 2)
son4t4 3 months ago
Why couldn't this video have been made while I was still in the closet? Geez, my life would have been so much easier. Haha, another great video!
gocallyoualawyer 4 months ago
Being in a Gay relationship is hard...
keepinkopasetic777 4 months ago
Sorry but..when you said " I've tried somethings" and gave that dirty little smile I LMAO - Cutest thing ever.
On a serious note: Great video! - touched on important topics not often dealt with. You're so right about the gay club thing. Im out but still feel really uncomfortable joining an alliance club at my university. Idk it really just doesn't appeal to me. I dont want to make my being gay a club thing. I know these orgs help but I feel like joining reduces perception of me to 1 aspect.
dothedeed 5 months ago
@dothedeed Guess you have a ways to go yet bud
dothedeed 5 months ago
wow. he is so cute and hot boy.
aaaaa895 5 months ago
Today was my first gay straight alliance meeting. It took a while but I made my club and 12 people came so far.
MyNameNoLongerExists 6 months ago
@MyNameNoLongerExists congratulations!
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
Eric,
You are such a wise man for your age! I'm proud to count you among my associates & hopefully friends. I'm 48 (yea an old man) but it has taken me a much longer time than it has for you to learn these lessons.
I hope that in your life time (I think it will be) that gay equality will be the norm and not the exception. You're lucky enough to have grown up in this time frame, just keep the torch going like you are!
castlevue 6 months ago
@castlevue Thank you! It does seems that as time passes more and more people realize that the right thing is to treat gay people with respect. I do think a few decades from now things will be quite different than they are today!
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
Very good info about things I think of as well. I can relate totally. Thank you for being so honest in your videos, and keep up the good work! I've only been out for a little over 2 years and still face problems like this.
thisispaul7 6 months ago
@thisispaul7 Honesty is the best policy when it comes to making my videos!
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
Rick, honestly I don't know how you do it. Watching you work your way through some pretty emotional feelings about being gay is absolutely refreshing. And so informative(!!), to gays of all ages that are in a similar place emotionally. For there are 20yr olds and 50yr olds that are going through similar phases of coming out and discovering what being gay means to them. Please know how fortunate you are to be going through them at your age - and not in your 40s, 50s, or even 60s! But no mat
zeek72358 6 months ago
@zeek72358 Thank you for your very nice comment!
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
I love these honet videos you make. I empathise with much that you say. Very obviously gay people used to intimidate me (and can still do occasionally) before I realised it was their confidence with their sexuality that scared me and not them themselves (and maybe some jealousy mixed in as well). With the mariage thing, I'm sure that getting into a long-term relationship would change your concerns over being married to a man at 50 (not that I have been in a l.t.relationship myself).
scarlet88breeze 6 months ago
I like all your insightful videos, you always seem to have answers to things people are afraid to ask.
85bmw528eguy 6 months ago
I am a girl but I can relate... I'm homosexual but heteroemotional. I want a husband and kids, but I feel zero attraction to the male body... This is bullshit. Stupid f*cking brain! :( What should I do?
TheMamadeira 6 months ago
Yeaaaa that's true ... that 50 years old thing is true too cause you won't stay a twink with flat abs for good neither your partner ... I guess love is the key to solve this problem ... if you happen to fall in love with a girl then let it go further .. sometimes when I joke around with myself :D I think I should marry a lesbian :D:D:D:D<3 Like I said it's a joke but there are some aspects of reality in it !!!!!!!
CyrusFun 6 months ago
As far as your comment about feeling how you feel about being married to another guy or letting your family know about said marriage, I think that as you get older, your thinking will evolve into living your life for you and those who make it worth living. That's how it happened for me, and I think you're WAAAY ahead of where I was at your age. :-)
emmtee03 6 months ago
I once again would like to commend you for having the courage to be yourself and make videos about the things that truly represent how you feel. There are others who feel the same way, and I'm sure you already know you're speaking to them and helping them to gain courage that they may not currently have. As an African-American male, when I was your age, there was a general shame of being gay. Even the best, most well-mannered gay folks were still seen as horrible by others.
emmtee03 6 months ago
erik - you are amazing!
z2u 6 months ago
I really appreciate this vid.
inquiry10 6 months ago
@inquiry10 Good to hear!
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
so young yet so wise, i am now in my late 40's and sex is not really at the top of list any more, just hanging out talking being together and cuddling up is fine with me, I would love to be able to marry the man I love.
Texasred63 6 months ago
Dear Erik:
Terrific video about our gay lives. Albert Einstein once said "The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious" . Each new encounter we have begins mysteriously and progresses to affection, kissing, seduction, stimulation sexual adventure and even a short term relationship or even longer. Any of these stages are beautiful within themselves and they go where they are going to go. We can't control it. Oral sex for the first few encounters then more if both agree.
Rick
Ricktheknive 6 months ago
i no it will sound funny but sex bores me like i cant just do one position i have to switch a bunch and do like every position in five mins or i get bored and i have trouble getting fucked it hurt so bad the first time but when i actually made it work with the guy i love (didnt work with the douche ex) but still it was uncomfortable for me we couldnt find a postion i was comfortable in and it doesnt help that my man can last literally hours
fandude15 6 months ago
Really good video. I have never been in a relationship or had sex, so the entire idea both frustrates me and makes me uncomfortable. I find I don't really belong anywhere; not in the straight world and not in the gay world. And I went through the whole uncomfortable with being gay bit, and now I'm just apathetic.
gustjorodedheo 6 months ago
exactly what i feel man...the truth lol :)
king4563 6 months ago
Eric, you seem to touch on subjects that other gay vlogers do not, and I think you do a wonderful job. I know I could be very comfortable sitting down to a conversation with you. Also, I like where you are recording your vlogs. It's very peaceful and the sunset was a nice touch.
alaninnh 6 months ago
@alaninnh My goal is to speak about true thoughts and feelings that many gay people find themself facing. Of course, most of it is based upon my experiences and feelings. I think this approach is the best way to connect with my viewers and to help some people out.
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
all people have attractions...even straigh men find other men attractive but we live in a society where its not ok to have those type of feeling and if you do you are "GAY" What you have been trying things....NOOOOOOOOOO Now you cant wear white on your wedding night..
depfox 6 months ago
Great vid topic :). I understand what you are talking about when it comes to the apprehension about certain things. When I walk around with my bf I sometimes feel weird and think people are staring when they are not. It's just something I will have to grow out of (the feeling, not the relationship lol)
IDH2008 6 months ago
@IDH2008 Yes, various aspects of being gay just take some time to get used to. I suspect I might also feel as though people are watching me once I am out and about with a boyfriend one day. But with time that feeling show fade away.
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
I feel what you're saying.The normal thing is a trap. The only form of normality available to a gay person is to be gay. After all the alternative is to be a closet case. Marcus Bachmann certainly doesn't appear normal to me. As for the sexual attraction, I was worried a lot about growing older with a guy because I am mainly attracted only to young guys. But here I am in my mid fifties and with the same guy for 25 years, and we're still doin' it, and I still like it with him.
abmindprof 6 months ago
@abmindprof I agree about Marcus Bachmann. That is good to hear about your relationship. I have also found that as I've grown from a young teen to a young adult the things I find attractive in a guy have changed an evolved.
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
SO, when you're 50, be married to a 30 year old. Just kidding. You make some very good points, though. Unless you semiscripted, it's amazing how well it flowed.
badger5402 6 months ago
@badger5402 When I film my videos I don't script before hand. I have a general topic in mind that I want to speak about and then speak off the top of my head. I think this is the best way for me to connect with my viewers. I do of course resay things if I feel like I didn't get my point across or if I feel like I could have said it better.
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
Very wise and insightful. Sex seems a lot more important in your 20's than later on. Marriage is not for everyone (divorce rate for straights tells us that). But wanting it will be determined by finding the "one" you love so much you can't imagine living apart from them. Sex is a part of what we do not who we are as a person. Regarding male attraction I love that straights have come up with the term Bro-mance to describe being attracted another straight male. They are just jeolous. :-)
Flanole 6 months ago
@Flanole Good comment!
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
a very open and honest vid my friend filled with great advice. keep up the good work ^^
thedarknesscallingme 6 months ago
@thedarknesscallingme =)
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
Thats very good advice. Also, as you grow older, the issues you face as a gay man will change as well. It's hard to describe, but as you age people treat you different. Theres alot of discrimination based on age and it really sucks. I'm going to do a video about that soon. People can be so cruel at times.
pvampire 6 months ago
great as usual!!!
dlyc4714 6 months ago
@dlyc4714 =)
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
Some of these things just don't need to be worried about. We tend to be attracted to men our own age, even if we do admire a hot young body. Don't worry about getting married! There's plenty of time for that after you have met someone you want to spend your life with, and he will have the characteristics you want, which may or may not be just as 'straight-acting' as you. And WHAT you do with another man will matter less as WHO you do it with matters more.
FWIW, I'm 57 yo, widowed by a man.
waynesb 6 months ago
when I was in my 20's I thought the same thing about being married to an older man as you mentioned. But now, 20 years later *I know* I have been with the same guy for 16 years. I still see in him the same person he was when we were both 26. Even though we are older we have matured together like a fine wine and I still see that same cute and it isn't weird at all at 42. So, just give yourself some time you will be surprised how you will grow and change over time. :)
BobbyBrady2000 6 months ago
I actually thought I was a bottom. After I tried it several times, I found out I liked topping MUCH better!
TheDS4000 6 months ago
@TheDS4000 Often times we find that our attractions and desires change and evolve.
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
Eric I'm just like you in that I used to think I'd only have oral sex. I'm 21 and the thought of getting married to another guy weirds me out as well. So good to hear it from someone else! But I also think it's because society has conditioned us to think that anything outside of the cookie-cutter heterosexual lifestyle is abnormal. I like to think that if you know what makes you happy then whatever you're confused about is irrelevant or will come together in the end :-)
FastMovinTrain 6 months ago
@FastMovinTrain I'm not weirded out by the thought of marrying a gay, rather thought of me being married to another man seems weird. Although, I suspect, if I find someone nice, it'll happen. I hope it happens. You're right about being conditioned and about the last peice of your advice.
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
@FastMovinTrain Everyone should listen to dan savage's podcast 'savage love' he effortlessly makes his listeners less weirded out by stuff. Where else do you have an advice collumnist field questions about people setting up a 4 way relationship with various gender mixes without batting an eyelid...
fomoran 6 months ago
Very good topic, I remember telling a good friend of mine who is also gay that the way that I am makes a lot of things about being gay that much harder lol. I just hope that as I keep going I start getting used to it as well.
LazyTallGuy 6 months ago
@LazyTallGuy Good luck
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
First I love the sun in the background. For me I went through a stage of wanting to be the gay image that is portrayed and I'm finding out that even though experimenting isn't wrong eventually what I need to also do is just be myself! Then when I search for love I don't have to worry the other guy isn't getting the real me. Liked your topic today.
123moscowman 6 months ago
@123moscowman Nicely said.
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
I'm glad to see a new video by you in my subscription box, it made me really happy to see it!
BrianRegan5 6 months ago
I didn't think I'd want to have oral sex until I found you but porn makes me sick.
MyNameNoLongerExists 6 months ago
UGH!! Our society is so messed up when it comes to human sexuality!! My partner Dave and I have been together for 20 years. I suppose we would classify ourselves as "masculine?" Who knows..OR who cares!! All I know is that we have had a BLAST!!!! I hope people realize that just because you are gay you do not have to go through life alone. TRUST ME!! I have been on both sides of the fence on this issue and this SHORT life is much more fun exploring it with someone you love... :)
stoner829 6 months ago 2
@stoner829 Outstand comment and sharing of wisdom.
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
@stoner829 Good point and great YT name!
jimbobubbadj 6 months ago
@jimbobubbadj Ah Geez..my last name is "STONE"..When AOL was so popular there were no "stone" names..thus I am "stoner".....I feel so sorry for gay kids..I still have PTSD from growing up gay in our society... PLEASE..let it get better for the next generation!!! Let's hope.. There is no "choice"..we are who we are... Jim
stoner829 6 months ago
Its completely normal to be uncomfortable around what you are not used to. Of course you would feel uncomfortable around feminine guys. It's because you have not yet had much interaction with them. Same goes for if you are Buddhist and you attend church for the first time. Of course you would be uncomfortable because you are not used to church practices. I think a large amount of suppose masculine guys misconstrue this as hate simply because they're not used to it yet. much more to this topic..
NixDreamtIncorp 6 months ago
@NixDreamtIncorp Yes, I agree with you and I have an idea for further exploration into this topic.
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
I love this one a lot. My problem is that i want a relationship with a guy but when the opportunity comes for a relationship, i get scared and chicken out. Any advice would be appreciated.....:)
kjpgt1991 6 months ago
@kjpgt1991 I'm not sure that I'd be the best person to give you advice about this issues. I've also not been in a relationship yet. Perhaps another viewer could leave you some advice.
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
It's nice that you talk about this sort of stuff, because truly, there are a lot of people who seem to feel that way, and that's OK, I also used to feel unsure about the whole lgbtq world a few years ago, but now I guess that I'm a lot more comfortable about my sexuality, nevertheless sometimes I still feel a bit awkward =/, nevertheless great vid! and beautiful bg =)
HRHrMegafan 6 months ago
@HRHrMegafan It's extremely common, of course, to be unsure about a lot of things when it comes to our sexuality and who we are emotionally attracted to. And I also know that it is just as common to have feelings of akwardness about it.
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
YES, you are so right .. I know what you're talking about.
I'm bi, well actually pan, but more into women.
I can totally see myself marrying another woman.. actually I want a family - I want four kids and a loved one - I don't care about their gender at all!
Right now I'm with a wonderful guy, and of course he knows I'm out & proud.
Me accepts that I'm joining pride festivals, going to gay bars and that I support the lgbtq group openly and plan to raise my (our, maybe) kids tolerant.
Catharina937 6 months ago
I am Bi but more into guys than girls. For me anal sex scares the hell out of me. When I think about it there is this really weird uncomfortable feeling that comes over me that say's "you're not going to like it" Yet i love ass, male or female a good ass is all I need LOL!!.. Thanks! Good VId!!
StarGateAndromeda 6 months ago
@StarGateAndromeda Yes, I think quite a large amount of guys have the same concern that you do.
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
Yo have obviously given this a lot of thought. Well done!
CatotheCensor1 6 months ago
@CatotheCensor1 I think many guys an girls have a large range of concerns when it comes to being gay or bisexual or whatever. I wanted to talk about some of the personal concerns that I've felt.
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago
You are always so informative and helping others. Love all your videos. Stay sweet <3
HotMissa 6 months ago
@HotMissa =)
StraightActingGayGuy 6 months ago