Homeland Terrorism Preparedness Bill (HR8791)

[rivaita]

Onion News Network. That says it all. FAKE as shit!! Just a joke, folks. NOT real!!

[dolittleskippy]

I could not find this bill in the congressional archives. The only references are about alien invasion of "enormous size with other worldly strength" as the guy above says. At first I thought this was about citizens revolting but then I read it. If anyone has a true copy please show me otherwise I have to consider this as fake as it appears.

[signsoftwentytwelve]

@dolittleskippy sounds like they removed from congressional files. Pls watch my ongoing playlist series "A Poisoned World" for more waaaayyyy down the abbit hole of raw truth...

[dolittleskippy]

@signsoftwentytwelve Okay. You do know this was off the Onion though right? I will watch whatever you send me to though.

[euphotic]

This is funny, perhaps, but at least say in the description that this IS a hoax video from TheOnion News Network (see the C in the C-SPAN logo?). You're freaking people out. Please rate my comment up so if the uploader troll doesn't comply, people have a chance at not wasting their life, losing sleep and be better informed of trolls amongst us.

[squillyb7718]

"Congress shall now vote for approval of HR 8791, the Homeland Terrorism Preparedness Bill. Said bill request emergency response funding up to and including 1 TRILLION dollars to prepare for national level terrorist attack and/or attack from UNIDENTIFIED BEINGS. Funding for first responder personnel and vehicles will be doubled if said attack leads to more than 80% of national population being effected by UNIDENTIFIED BEINGS.

declassified at pastebin(dot)com/6SsVVEdd

not a joke

[SomGera]

this means the end of freedmon in USA, and others will follow.stupid Merkel is part of the plan, and it's already, as predicted, talking about a Super-Europe....controlled by the same bankers, controling each parliament, in each country, suporting high politictians, so that they rule decisions in their favor.and so that FMI can lend infinite "bailouts", that is more debt!!!....more to come....

[SomGera]

do you really understand what he says????they know people will insurge, and are preparing diligences so that it's perfectly legal.i'm from PORTUGAL, and i'm sorry to say, you must stop bankers and big corporations shred you country and economy apart.search about iceland, they arrested their politicians, and bankers, took their money, made a new constituition, and are nwo lead by 2 people representative.wake up!!!!it's means if you go agaisnt them, theyy will do whatever they want!!!

[SomGera]

@SomGera errata : 25 people representative

[p0isonedx]

Sounds like government sanctioned killings of zombies if they get out of the secret classified lab they're being held in. It's our new weapon, we just infect people or send zombies to their country if we don't like them.

[signsoftwentytwelve]

@p0isonedx Dulce Base, Area 51.. etc..

[mkgames2002]

This is a joke. It is an Onion video.

[signsoftwentytwelve]

@mkgames2002 maybe so but look around you, watch my AW ("A Poisoned World") series and can u still tell me its a joke..

[changethecurrent]

@mkgames2002 No joke, this is very real and was leaked to the public. I think that the guy speaking is jim saxon of NJ

[signsoftwentytwelve]

@changethecurrent watch my APW (A Poisoned World) series ongoing, on my channel to see how real this gets

[conservativetothecor]

What??? This is a joke right? I mean I knew Congress was insane but this takes the cake.

[signsoftwentytwelve]

@conservativetothecor maybe so but look around you, watch my AW ("A Poisoned World") series and can u still tell me its a joke

[conservativetothecor]

@signsoftwentytwelve Yes I believe it . Im already of the opinion that they are all treasonous, with one exception that Ive seen....Ron Paul...and oh maybe his son. 

[nordqk]

Remember H.G. Wells War of the Worlds hoax on the radio back in 1938? Everyone then thought it was real then, too.

[signsoftwentytwelve]

@nordqk maybe so but look around you, watch my AW ("A Poisoned World") series and can u still tell me its a joke.

[mikedegraz]

zombies....

[mylifeisnapless]

The Onion, if only you had as much of a following as the radio show on April Fools day so long ago. Imagine, more people would have seen this satiric story and a bigger panic would have ensued. Of course, if more people would have seen it, the hoax would have been revealed sooner.

Obviously, if this were real, it would have been done in secret session. Sorry, no aliens yet.

[33sword]

It is the slow weakening of nations to worship the beast REV 13:15-17! Some say aliens, the book(kjv) says demons! These & other sorrows will highten! I'm talking to the believers! All the guns in the world won't save u! Be baptized in the name of the LORD JESUS CHRIST & filled with the holy ghost! Peter said that for those who claim him to be the first pope(ACTS 2:38). Jesus didnt leave him in charge(LUKE 12:39-43). Being of a religion or religions aint gon cutt it! Holyness is required!

[signsoftwentytwelve]

@33sword Amen to that my friend, Amen!!

[StruckANerve426]

@33sword You honestly buy into that nonsense that was written by a bunch of old, gray haired, fucks 2000 years ago? Use your mind son. Religion is nothing more than population control.

[33sword]

@StruckANerve426 lol! I dont do religion. Religion got man messed up & divided. For me there is the book & JESUS.

[signsoftwentytwelve]

@33sword exactly, but try tellin this to the masses of sheeple, they'd rather worship lucifer becuz they think hell is far much more fun.

"Broad is path to destruction, many who go there. Narrow is path to life, few go there."

Matthew 7:13

Pls watch my ongoing APW (A Poisoned World) series

Health, Peace, Truth, Wisdom,

MB

[pocketsofpeace]

The onion is the Red/Blue/Pink dots on your mailbox! The Red dot means take them out of their house and shoot them on the spot no questions asked. The Blue dot means Fema camp. The pink dots mean they think you will make a good slave to the new regime. And the Aliens! are Demons and cant hurt Christians.

THIS IS A HOAX!

SuperLagMaster (see my channel and pockets channel as well!)

[rideup99]

STOP drinking the kool-aid folks.

Look at the C-span logo. This was made by The Onion, a satirical news organization. The plutocrats run the world, not some ridiculous conspiratorial group.

[ThisIsNotPictureTube]

WTF

[jdmyerscountry]

THIS IS NOT REAL FOLKS...however I wouldn't at all be surprised much of what REALLY goes on isn't far from this! It's pretty funny how realistic this is and it's made a fool out of a lot of people who freaked out over it. It is painfully obvious to me that a video such as this is created to make some of us say to ourselves that we are thinking crazy and there's NO WAY that anything like martial law could be declared. Well it can be declared, evil just needs an opportunity. That is NOT crazy

[bluebakerpie]

NO CHAIR BEHIND HIM IN WIDE SHOT

GREEN SCREEN

[TheVictor6951]

this very old FAKE VIDEO,,,its just a spoof,,put up something of value,,OLD FAKE NEWS,,,LMFAO

[watershed44]

@llovemakalaa:

Because you are alien you can't understand the unpredictability or resistance your kind will encounter from the Human race. You see many of us are absolutely uncontrollable, not only that we persist and survive against all odds.

You will be defeated and God will see to it you are properly punished for your arrogance.

[Bethewheatnotthetare]

This is no spoof the military is mobilizing right now with massive amounts of weapons across the country these beings are huge and who knows what they bring with them by way of weapons

[Ilovemakalaa]

Once all of this is over you will thank us. We need you to understand one main thing. "Belive" in whatever you want. It is what keeps us alive.

It is not a conspiracy if you know that it is happening.

Join us? or take advantage of you?

[Ilovemakalaa]

New laws have been drafted and or passed to give us more power over you. You tell us and we are listening. You ask "who asked you" We say " You did" Actions speak louder then words. We have given you enough time to change and see that without our approval you will continue to go down the wrong path. We are using milliums of information and your own religions to keep you in the dark.

[Ilovemakalaa]

Not true you say??? 3.5 million years of evolution. We have been there behind closed doors from the beggining. And sooner then later you push yourselves to what you call armageddon. So dont complain when we finally give it to you. So go out and burn your flags no matter what country it is. Go out and complain as much as you can. As you can see we are no fully in control. Those who want to survive can, those who want to not survie then dont. The less population on your planet the better.

[Ilovemakalaa]

need to govern you. In the future there will be laws that apply to every human on this planet. Disputes will be able to be concluded internationaly. Yes we use fear to push you in our direction. Yes we use deception. Yes we use terrorism. It is what you require. From the beggining these are the instruments that all of your religions have used in order to push you in one direction. Unfortunantely the main direction is meant to push yourselves away from each other. No peace. Only way.

[Ilovemakalaa]

destroy and anahalate with help from your own government. In the future there will be less population, but you will thank us once your have your peace. We are everywhere. All around you. You complain in your videos, but once your are away from your computers there is nothing you can do. We are doing this for your benifit. Most of you dont see it. Most of you just choose to ignore it. Just remember that as long as you continue to pay your taxes in any and all forms you give us all the funding we

[Ilovemakalaa]

programmed to do. "Exsist by all means" if it were not for our necessaty evil you would have used all natural resources without thought. You are a greedy species and for that you must be governed by all means. Complain all you want, but without us you humans would have goen extinct millions of years ago. It is now time for change. To live in a world where the rule of law governs. Not your hate or greed. No. not all of you humans are like this. We have been very lucky. Being able to

[Ilovemakalaa]

give us your freedom and liberties. Dont worry we will give them back when we are finished putting the world together. In the future the word sovernty will only exist in history books. For the past 1,680 years we have been killing as many of your species as necessary. You complain and calls us the bad one, but without our neccesary evil your species would have destroyed everything on your planet. Do not delude yourselves. If given the chance you would do what every other species is programed t

[Ilovemakalaa]

We are eating your country from the inside out and tell you about it everyday. Dont blame us just because you are not paying attention. Dont complain just becuase you dont want to realize the truth. That we are reconstructing what we destroy. We are giving you what you have asked for from the beggining of your species. War! and then peace! From the ashes of your country we are giving you the public what you want. Yes there is a give and take. We give you peace, but in exchange you must

[Ilovemakalaa]

One world, Under us, For liberty and justice for all<

You dont have to agree with what we do. We dont have to come to you because we are already here. We have been fighting for a new world. And now we are making it come true. There is nothing any of you can do about it. There is no one to complain to. There is no one you can imprison. There is no one you can argue with. We are here. And we are taking over everything. You dont believe me? Just walk outside your door and look around you.

[herrickcharles]

No way it's a hoax--Someone tryng to make us THINK its fake so they took C-Spans vid, replaced the graphcs (see tinyurl-6co8ttz vs tinyurl-5tvuz67) Hacked the Onion's site tinyurl-3g5f54e & IMDB page tinyurl-3c45zxk Kept it secret from them for 4 yrs; Deletd public record of the bill (gpoaccess dot gov/bills) Removd any refrence to Rep John Haller--EXCEPT this story, & duped the country that the 12th Dist. of PA rep. since '99 was Daryl Metcalfe: tinyurl-3w6dwua ..Well, I'm NOT FOOLED!!

[Daddyo930]

I googled this guy. He is real, so is his district, so is this bill. Just because you put an onion on something does not make it satire. This shit actually happened. I watch C-span every day. What are you stupid, fat, lazy, ignorant, apathetic fools waiting for? Some idiot says "It's fake" and you automatically believe them? Do your own research and make up your own mind. THIS IS REAL! THEY ARE NOT PLAYING AROUND! WAKE UP LITTLE SHEEP.

[BryanW1988]

It's fake. This clip came from The Onion's channel. See? It's not really C-SPAN. I was freaked out at first too. Tell everyone this is fake. Last thing we need is fake conspiracy bs discrediting what we know. Spread this info!

[peterpenny11]

I really dont' know hwat he is talking about. It is too classified

[cah271983]

research if u think there joking cuz the way its lookin we only have a short time.

[SexxyKevin]

Sorry to ruin all the fun... but here's the link to the original video which IS a spoof. /watch?v=HWfKdKWJEkM

[blueangel528hz]

The ANNUNAKI are on there way back!! God save us.

[crapfig]

haha zombies YES!!

[eternalblackproject1]

looks like all the illuminatti has to do now, is post an onion on anyone trying to warn the masses, and the masses fall for it and become conspirators and help the fucking illuminati laugh at the humans who believe the truth.. sad...

[eternalblackproject1]

looks like all the illuminatti has to do now, is post an onion on anyone trying to warn the masses, and the masses fall for it and become conspirators and help the fucking illuminati laugh at the humans who believe the truth.. sad...

[signsoftwentytwelve]

@eternalblackproject1 ... and that's how they do it... that's exactly why illuminati created the tabloids, to fictionalize reality.

[eternalblackproject1]

it's regarding annunaki return in 2012

[eternalblackproject1]

Well, clearly, this isn't a fake. I watch CSPAN and I remember this. They showed this on the regular CSPAN channel once. I don't know, but I think you may have something on this one, @pril.

<< This is true, The cover up is C-span and illuminatti making this disapear, like they made JFK disapear.

[tokkenn]

@eternalblackproject1 IT IS FAKE. get over it.

[eternalblackproject1]

@tokkenn It’s not Fake, Google Pole Shift 2012. Annunaki Planet X 2012. They built the Pyramids.

[wayneswhls]

I guess there is just too many humans.

[Jambo4sfmm]

This is from Onion News. Its not real.

[ginnetwork]

NIBIRU

[TheTruthRightBeforeU]

Guys its not aliens. Aliens don't get released or SPEW, LEAK or do they OUTBREAK or do they ESCAPE. It's talking about BIO Weapons and the like

[TheTruthRightBeforeU]

Did this Bill get passed

[2bbgunzup]

Terrorist are everywhere just roaming the streets eager to blow something up.

[O2Hyii]

i dont care who or what their breeding making or hiding im ready............ the godz are here

[AdamManns]

whatt the fuck man

[vanwaltly87]

anyone else think its funny that this is a video from the Onion. Not C-span, but theonion span. look in the bottom right hand corner of the screen.

[sixtonshark]

LOL, This is from THE ONION, and is therefore FAKE. You paranoid idiots will eat up anything that plays into your fears. The Onion is a joke/satire site, everything in the video is fiction.

[tymmorrison]

Holy Shit

[channel270]

FAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! STOP SPREADING THIS FAKE VIDEO DUMBASSES

[Phillydee2060]

r we breeding aliens?? WTF!! he said flesh eating buy guns people!

[signsoftwentytwelve]

@Phillydee2060  Yes the gov't is breading half-hybrid alien-humans..(i.e. Attack of the Clones).. pls UT search "Dulce Base" and "Area51".. the Truth is out there...

[ancxxxsold13r]

@signsoftwentytwelve they can't do that...there ruining our species/genes. we have to do something about this

[loverlion6]

@signsoftwentytwelve to clear things up the word "hybrid" already hints that it is already a mix of some form so you don't need to say half...

[conshuscriterion]

Satire or not it is still disturbing how the Illuminati flaunt their power around in plain sight and most sheeple don't see it or don't care!! If you think the Illuminati don't exist just type wwwdotitanimullidot org or net into your web browser and see what interesting website comes up!! It's how they hide just beneath the surface of everyday life! They say things backwards and use signs and symbology! Their key tone is is infiltration by any and all means to their specific ends!

[conshuscriterion]

@conshuscriterion and by dot in the web addy I of course mean a . thus dot! Try it some will be blown away others will laugh see for yourselves!

[gabovski]

@conshuscriterion It's not true!!!! My god stop beliving in anything y ousee on the internet!. Man I didn't commented to be rude,just to open your eyes! I f you start beliving what's the onion is telling you... well I wish you dont come close to a Koran or a bible cause you gonna be pretty dangerous

Yes there is conspiration, no doubt about it, but this??? It's the onion for christ sake

[conshuscriterion]

@gabovski I just fucking said I don't actually believe only that it is possible! Now you're just getting on my last nerve! and learn how to spell and type for Gods' sake. And I hold the Bible rather close to my heart and it does NOT make me dangerous! What is your major malfunction can you not read??? I don't necsarily believe it I never said I did!!! And you are rude and ill mannered!! I'd say that you are fairly young. Is that a fair assumption???

[gabovski]

@conshuscriterion Ok look sorry for making fun of what you belive in. Sincerly sorry, but im not young im in my 30, and beliving all this conspiration craps, and the bible, probably the Torah, that doesn't make you a sane person.

So what I'm saying, and this apply to your religion too, if you can't prove something, or double check it, don't belive in it

[conshuscriterion]

@gabovski Apology accepted but please don't continue to think that I believed what I saw. And never insult another mans religion. Because you have no idea what I believe and do not believe that is obvious! And you question my sanity as well!?! Do you consider yourself to be sane then??? And besides how can you prove Gods' existence? You cannot except in your heart and mind! He is there but you have to listen when He speaks. He speaks to each of us differently!! He is truth without definition!

[ata1136]

hahaha i love how everybody thinks this vid is real... guys do you not see the onion logo? this is satire, to prove it, look up john haller, the guy whos talking, he doesnt actually exsist. I am both enthused and ashamed at the human race for all these vids pissed as hell about this "news"

[cbenedetto09]

Dear Credulous Dumbasses, "The Onion" is a satire site, this is satire, there is no such bill and no such "Representative." "O-Span" is the Onion's C-Span parody. Sincerely, Non-developmentally delayed America

[eternalblackproject1]

@cbenedetto09 Really, can you show us where we can find the part where this is funny, or the disclaimer and the rest of the episode where the guy comes on and actually mentions the onion network by name! can you tell me where I can find this actor, what his name is, other parodies he has done! How the fuck they were able to rent the real congress and congress members in the background!

[flat6quattro]

@eternalblackproject1 two words. green screen. I, for one, don't trust the government one bit but this video is a hoax.

[JamesRideout123]

@cbenedetto09 They just posted onion there so that people would think it is fake. If they did not do that and actually posted it as real it would not be on Youtube. If you think this is false all you need to do is listen to his voice and watch his lips and you can tell it is not dubbed. People feel they are better off living in a world where they can trust the government. But your trust and ignorance is like dead weight on a ship that will drown the rest of us.

[Khatharr]

@cbenedetto09 Dear ignorant moron, thanks for ruining an epic troll.

[cbenedetto09]

@Khatharr Firstly, many, many mentally challenged people are *STILL* (still!) PMing me about how this is real, so "epic troll" has hardly been ruined. Secondly, a two year old onion video is more "tired meme" than "epic troll," but I understand if you just learned that phrase and wanted to use it. Thirdly, pointing out that it's a troll in a comment does a lot more to "ruin" the joke than my comment, but that's obv'sies.

[mackdancer12]

Are you kidding me? It's like a bad mad lib page.

[conshuscriterion]

When the man reading the bill pauses and says 'Jesus' and then says thats classified and far surpassing our worst nightmares....ummm I don't know about the rest of you but....DAMN!! Honestly. That was a genuine reaction and then he caught himself and rambled on through it rather quickly! Everyone is entitled to their own beliefs but this bothers me alot!!!!!!!

[gabovski]

@conshuscriterion You belive anything you see dont you?

Man I'm laughing my ass off!

[conshuscriterion]

@gabovski and as for you I didn't say I believed , I am not susceptible to just anything! I said that the mans reaction was genuine and that it bothered me greatly! So keep laughing if you wish! But IF, and it's a big if, this is true then we all are in alot of danger from a domestic foe! You are quite indolent! And more than a bit rude!

[Flex3182]

@conshuscriterion You know what bothers me? The fact that you believe this.

[conshuscriterion]

@Flex3182 I don't believe it outright I believe in the possibility of it happening!! What bothers me is that so many blindly follow an ideology that suffocates our very creativity! Liberty and Freedom are two very different things. A sailor, when the ship docks in port has LIBERTY to LEAVE the ship but he is still subject to the laws that govern him! He still must return to the ship. Freedom means you are free from the laws that would bind you to a materialistic world and hold you in captivity!

[Flex3182]

@conshuscriterion Correction. The fact that you believe that this could happen bothers me.

[batonpatriot]

WHO is this man in vid? How does one explain seeing this vid 'live' on C Span, WAYYYYY BEFORE POSTED HERE.

[StreetPunk2369]

i now hear this is fake made by onion news!

[signsoftwentytwelve]

@mexisxfamousxstylzz

They flagged your comment as spam...

Nephilim = spam?????????????????

What are they tryin to hide....

[signsoftwentytwelve]

Look what illuminati is doing in the Gulf Oil spill right now... we can put a man on the moon, but we cannot cap an oil well.. RIGHT!!!!

[conshuscriterion]

@signsoftwentytwelve I wholeheartedly agree man! They never even finished cleaning up the Exxon Valdez and now this just 'happens'. They never let anything happen they make it happen for a reason. And I think it was Rahm Emmanuel who said, "Never let a good crisis go to waste." Well now we have a new czar in charge of this disaster and the relief they will supposedly give the people in the gulf. Not likely to be a good thing!

[corruptiongovernment]

They will all believe it is a joke. Perfect. Good job ONION!

[StreetPunk2369]

there is nothing funny about this!

[signsoftwentytwelve]

@StreetPunk2369

Yes I agree not funny but the deceptions have gone on for so long that it is so difficult for many to see the Truth anymore. People would rather worship Ballgames, video games, Hollywood movies, sit-coms, fantasy-land... no more raw truth.. sad...

"For Broad is the path to destruction and many there be who go there.

Narrow is the path to ever-lasting life, few there be who find it."

Matthew 7:13

[conshuscriterion]

@signsoftwentytwelve Amen signs! And hey streetpunk did you know the Hebrew word for the Nefilim is NFL!! You know how their words are without the vowels and all! LOL I found that to be amusing and disturbing!

[signsoftwentytwelve]

@StreetPunk2369

"It is better to be hurt by the raw truth, rather than to be comfortably deceived."

MB

Pls view my channel.

Peace. truth. Health.

[omegaking1]

these stupid niggas need to wake the fuck uP its about 2 be on TRUE ISRAEL LIVES!!1

[WarriorKingsIsrael]

ISRAELites better WAKE THE FUCK UP NOW OR DIE a horrible death with 2/3 of our nation

[Jordainio]

Ahhh...haha ok.

[MsAngelfish]

Spoof people - see the little onion symbol where the c is supposed to be in cspan. The Onion is satirical comedy, although this is not in the least bit funny.

[omegaking1]

@MsAngelfish that cspan aljazeer dumb ass its real

[gabovski]

@omegaking1 no it's not, it's the onion poor uneducated man!

[CaptnMayhem]

It's a joke -

(take out spaces in the following link)

w w w . theonion . c o m / content / video/proposed_classified_bill­_will

Im sure alot of it was classified - and The Onion ran with it. Note the Onion graphic in front of SPAN at the lower right. Good luck finding a video that isnt by The Onion on this, as google seems to only have this version. And most are discussing it as 100% truth. Dont believe everything you see,read,hear...

Again its a joke by The Onion..

[valleytenderfoot]

One of the funniest Spoofs I have seen the Onion News Network put out, well done!!

[signsoftwentytwelve]

Enjoy the humor while it lasts, it won't be so funny once Martial Law is implemented very soon..

[valleytenderfoot]

Is this Martial Law due to the impending return of the flu this fall, or is it a lead up to the impending end of the world which is scheduled to occur in three years, four months and four days?

[valleytenderfoot]

And further to that, is the world going to end because Nibiru hits the Earth or because the Mayan long count calander ends, or is there another reason I am missing?

[UNDguy1987]

Okay I hate to be the bearer of bad news but when the Maya calender ends it just starts over.

[valleytenderfoot]

lol,

Yep you're preaching to the choir with me Undguy, I know that little fact.