END ABUSE NOW! TonyaTko Domestic Violence Intervention

[filmtress]

I love your professional and compassionate way of helping this young lady.  Beautiful display of friendship & love. I am better having viewed this video. I am favoriting this. You are a SISTER AT WORK! Whoo Hooo!

[thestreetdogg]

"Tanyatko" reading the title of the Video made me believe that u have smth against Domestic Violence. After watching ur video for few minutes I understood that u are against Male Domestic Violence, NOT VIOLENCE in general. The Fact is that MAN is abused from women more than MAN abuse women.

1 in 14 MAN is a victim of Domestic Violence.

1 in 15 women is a Victim of Domestic Violence.

This is another anti Male video.

since there is no 0 star to rate, I will rate ur video 1 star. :)

[filmtress]

You see this video as an anti-male video? You are STUPID!

[loki3965]

Listen Ebony i am a man but listen that clown is no man if he hits a woman or verbally or sexually assaults her so get out and put a restraining order on that ass

[Takifun]

lmao she said hes black too they'll be more then happy to arrest him,wow its sad but true.This girl seems foolish to me though.

[meyerchick89]

This is such a beautiful thing that you've done Tonya. Im praying for Ebony and so many women out there that have been victims of domestic abuse including my mother.

[pinkythebrain7]

I am sitten here with Tyra on mute. Your show is better and actually has meaning in my life. Your positive topics uplift many. This topic may have saved a life... Ebony's and so many others. I wish there was a Tonya Tko when I was 16.

Rha

[pinkythebrain7]

Tonya I have been watching the DV videos. I would love to come on your show and discuss my dealings with DV well as a book myself and 2 co -authors have written Revealing & Healing: 3 Womens Stories of Survival release date Fall 2009. I was a victim for 5 years it began as a teen I then became an abuser. Your advice you have given is priceless and can save a life. My co - author saw abuse as a child and then became a lifelong victim. The key is to LEAVE! I will PM you as well.

Rhasha

[spiritofexellence]

I have favorited all of these vids.

Tonya I salute you for this.

Janet

[sade7998]

She need to leave her state and not tell anyone where she is, no one! Take her money and leave the state and give up everything because her life is what matters. I don't believe in the cops because My mom had 3 retraining orders on my dad, he just got of jail from a 10 yr bid suppose to be 20 from killing a pregnant woman and two guys when he was 16. My dad was my mom middle school sweetheart. She waited till he got out and this what he gave her

[TonyaTko]

OMG! Wow... that is horrible! That man is out of control. Yeah... I forgot how belittling getting broken up with can be, and ppl like those love power and control, and having someone leave them takes away their power. Some ppl DO respond to restraining orders though. Everybody needs different level of restraint though, and you're right, at time the cops are useless.

Did you see the followup vid?

-Tko

[sade7998]

to limit the high risk chances of getting stalk or killed by this man, she will need to leave the state or even whatever coast she is staying in. She will need to gather some mony and runaway for awhile and stay low. This dude have a record. If she goona leave him, she need to leave hiim and also leave the state far awayy. And tell no one where she will be. We don't know this dude and we don't know what this dude is capable of. order of protection isn't good for nothing unless you are dead

[sade7998]

My mom has six kids,my dad put a gun to her head at my grandma house pregnant with my little sister and in front of us he click that gun back and told her make a choice, in front of all 5 of us and her unborn child. My dad beat her but never touch us. getting out as not as easy as you can say. It is easier said then done. this girl is young and still growing and learning about life. I bet if she leave this dude he will stak her and her family and kill her unless she go under some protective serv

[sade7998]

People on here saying she should have been left why is she staying, Let me tell you something we don't know this girl at all, we don't know what she been through her life experinces growing up or anything for that matter. We just know what she is telling tonyatko.

[eluvg1975]

poor baby

[monica24b]

has she called? I hope she's alright.

[TonyaTko]

An update video is processing....

-Tko

[professorthinkalot]

got damn you talk a long time

[donutmaster]

It's a complicated and common subject.

[misswynn23]

It was so grateful of you to do this video!

[artantro3]

Tonya this was good work that you done with Ebony. I hope that she would act on every thing that you tried to do with her. So many women go back to these relationships thinking that things will change. Prayer for her she get help.

[trinidad718]

wow I hope we can follow up on Ebony!! I would really like to know what happens. she's in my prayers!!

[rajideepa]

shea butter update please...

[2hot2trot]

I do hope Ebony doesn't turn back. Please check back with her to see if she is still on the path to breaking away from this man, and also to let her know how much we all care about her. Tell her I sent my love to her. Tell her she is never alone because you are here, and we are here.Sometimes women just need to talk especially during the dark hours of uncertainty. See even though her situation is terrible,she will still have to grieve the loss. I know you understand about this process.

[DazHype]

you provide such an essential service for so many lost and wounded souls out here...

[2hot2trot]

My comment con't. No shelters, no police help, leaving him didn't help. He would find me & take my children, he kept loaded guns in the house, no one could visit me, played Russian roulette with us, brought home disease, but I MADE IT OUT. I was so afraid I would have to resort to violence 'cause it was spilling over to my children

I am spiritual, not religious. I believe in miracles because I've been granted them. I began to pray, & God removed this man from my life w/o violence.

[TonyaTko]

WOW! Reading this gave me chills! We are going to have to follow-up on Ebony.

-Tko

[2hot2trot]

Tonya, I am so sorry I missed this live broadcast. Tonya I am so glad you were there to help this young lady help herself. It's like you told her, it won't be easy, but she can do it. She has taken to first step, and I hope she won't turn back. I know how scared she is because I have been in this situation. My first husband, a minister, was verbally, emotionally, sexually, & physically abusive to me. This was over 35 years ago, & bck. then were no shelters, so I had to find another way.

[Modeltrainguy]

It's really no surprise the guy was calling her names and then say "I'm sorry....'. Clearly, she SHOULD have said to him from the 1st profane word out of his mouth "If you say any of that to me one more time 'it's OVER'! Same if it were a hit.

Interesting women look at me funny when I say "I don't curse, smoke, drink....." Gosh! I wonder "why" I get those strange looks....and laughs? o_O

And "I Listen".

[sade7998]

its easier said then done

[HollieLuxx]

i was going through the same thing. i really hope she gets out of the relationship. dont stay with him. theres no turning back.

[ttdean]

There is so much information out there about domestic violence. There is never a good enough reason for staying with a "MF" that beats, and humiliates you. "Being afraid" is not a real reason. Picking up a phone and calling 911 is the first step, the police will escort you to a shelter. Going to your nearest DSS is another place to get help. Even a dummy can call 411 and get help. You must have no self esteem whatsoever to to allow beating during sex, and disrespect to your body, mind and soul

[TonyaTko]

Dean you are very insensitive... and you ask these questions now with indignation, but i KNOW first had that the Universe has a way of MAKING us understand. SO you ask now... but one day will come your answer in a way you can't mistake. Observe and see...

-Tko

[ttdean]

I'm not insensitive. I have already been there and done that hellified life already. I've seen my mother, sisters, aunties and cousin all go through the same abuse. So insensitive...NOT! I will say that there was a time when men beating women, especially if it was his wife, it was permitted. Police would not get involved if a woman was beat by her husband. Women have come a lon long way in terms of knowing that this kind of behavior is si unnaceptable, it does not mean he loves you, it means...

[ttdean]

there are 2 sick people here. The perpetrator and the receiver. Can you see where I'm going? You can't abused if you are not there. He cannot abuse you if you are not there, isf you do not allow it. There is plenty of help for anyone in this situation. A person has to want help just like a drug addict has to want help, to get help. Did you know that CPS will take your children away if you are in a DV household? The police will lock you up for having your child in that. No excuses for abuse!

[ttdean]

Is this Ebony girl serious? What has happened in her life that she keeps going back? Where is her father? Has she asked herself why she keeps going back? Does she think this is love? Does she value her own safety?

[KannDous]

verbal abuse is the first red flag. the "sorry i was just mad" is a trick to get u 2 stay. been there, dun that. i feel sorry for all the girls in situations like dat

[Vinnylili05]

Tonya you're the best! I wish i had you around when my sister went through an issue in which she was stabbed 12 times and her 18 month old baby was murdered by her father..I cried the whole while during the show, because when my sister came to me for help, I did not have enough information to give her that would have saved my niece's life...Thank you soo much for this Tonya. God bless you..And to the young lady get out before its to late..PLEASE TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY!

[TonyaTko]

OMG Vinny, I'm so sorry to hear that! How horrible. What happened to the father, was it a murder suicide or is he serving time?

-Tko

[Vinnylili05]

He is serving 3 consecutive life terms in prison for murder and attempted murder

[gunitsoldier5025]

i beat my wife. so what!

[Narrelle]

oke this cmmnt is so wrong. people try to help and you make a joke out of it. you suck!

[bubblegumlol21]

your so write

thats just sick making a joke out of somik like that

[RiotGrrrlLogic]

Who isn't abused these days....

[darlingpersephone]

Abusive relationships are bad because for one thing... they are majorly brain washing and scar the women/men from future relationships and trusting others. My sister is going through an abusive relationship and she will do ANYTHING her boyfriend asks, even though he choked her several times when she was pregnant and hit her. She has always been a strong woman to me and to see her in that situation saddens me SO much. It's funny because her boyfriend is a straight up JACK ASS

[darlingpersephone]

so I don't under stand why she stays.

[bubblegumlol21]

i know my sister was going through the same thing but shes now takeing legal action. im glad shes finally taking a stand. you just have to be strong for your sister she will get through it

[Popadibs]

I hope this ebony chick takes some kind of legal action if what she's saying is true. If she doesn't she might be dead or suffer.

[bubblegumlol21]

yeah i know i wish her all the luck in the world. and i hope she takes a stand

[jaysicka06]

damn this is an hour long! lemme go get a snack and tune in!

[FB474]

tonya are you a pshyciatrist or something and who in their right mind would watch a vid more than an hour long

[LauraDink]

It's awesome what you are doing Tonya!

[illdoit3]

Women empower men to keep beating them when they dont leave the first time. dont get me wrong, children, finances and alot of other things are reasons for staying in a abusive relationship but its not worth the bumps and bruises, and mental scars. The first time he/she physically abuses one...leave. physical and mental abuse is even worse.

[DeepSpaceBlack]

Sex besides other factors got her all messed up.

[Bxcutie718]

i dont wanna be demeaning but i feel like...why stay in a relationship knowing that this man is gonna hurt you again? like why stay with him knowing how his temper blows and knowing that when u have intercourse with him hes not making love to you he's raping you and on top of all that trying to impregnate you to trap you into a lifetime of hurt? i hope ebony listens to everything you told her and goes down to the police station and file a report against him....

[ATLalana87]

Scared? What for?

[monica24b]

maybe she's too afraid to leave the person abusing her

[ttdean]

Being afraid is not a good enough reason to keep being abused. You can be afraid and end up dead. You can be afraid and call 911 and get some friggin help. It's so senseless to allow someone to hurt, degrade, beat, rape, disrespect you to the point where you feel like nothing.

[elemantal13]

That's a stupid reason to unsubscribe.

[FreeHandMehndi]

I just came out of a marriage that was just like Ebony's relationship (without the hitting), lasted only 8 months. They are very charming/loving, then turn into monsters once they see they have you. It takes a lot of guts to get out of a relationship like that. It is best just to leave men like this. I couldn't stay around for him to get counseling, while he tore me apart inside. The name calling, belittling, and personal attacks on the daily can ruin you.

[SinnamonS]

Well That was Great Tonya Great Stuff !!!

[31MelKo]

I can't believe this is happening to this young lady. I hope she takes your advise and go to the police and tell on him because it's just going to get worst...

[ReviveUK]

Good heart T Tko...tell the girl to keep a written log of anything he does after she has filed the report. with dates and times ..she may forget with the stress...also to keep texts, get witnesses if he turns up etc...this will also help with his arrest (well I don't know how it works in the US) and gives more concrete evidence of his behaviour...but in that, she must not respond/talk to him/reply to text messages etc.....I hope she gets the strength and support from those around her too

[loupremo]

sorry Ebony, but you need to call some of your male cousins, brothers (if you have any) and male friends and whoop your "boyfriends" ass. I think that would teach him to keep his hands off of you. I have two sisters and 6 brothers and that's how we do it around here. And secondly, black woman, stop falling in love with men out of jail and give us college graduates a change. I know we aren't "thug" enough but at least we won't beat you.....

[sade7998]

volioence doesn't acoompany anything it just makes things worst

[poetree2000]

Good job Tonya...she needed some support...Ebony you made the right decision...I know it was hard but the things that you will be most proud of in your life, are the things that are the hardest!!! You will be very proud of yourself when this is over :-)

[jcschick121]

by 8:40 I was bawling my eyes out lol. This is a flashback to my relationship a few years ago that I was finally able to escape from. I know exactly how that girl is feeling.

[RevMichelle]

Very well done Tonya. As a women survivors of domestic violence I feel her pain. These women are brainwashed, and they become co-dependant. My prayers are with this young woman.

[HarrySackthatsme]

in the islam it is not forbidden to hit your wife

[FreeHandMehndi]

Yes it is! The verse that everyone throws around about wife beating, is translated from Arabic to English, and is translated improperly.

[pinker90]

can you do a video on what happened in the end?

[sexynovember26]

i had to post this as my myspace blog

[bebe4c03]

i'm young as well...but I guess i'm glad my mom was there to always tell me not to take that from no man...no man is worth the pressure

[b703ng]

Domestic violence is very high in the gay community.

[TheLastKiss00]

Wow, Ebony is so young.

I'm glad you made those phone calls to help her out, and I hope everything works out for her.

I'm interested in knowing what happened after she went to the station!

[lilchocolatz]

wow, i sat and watched the whole hour and 10 minute video. i'm glad ebony is getting the help she needs.

any update after she went inside the precinct? did she follow through with filing the report?

[b703ng]

the devil comes as an angel of light.

[pinker90]

woah!!!! loooooong video!

[GOON1991]

wow i just bought my cousin a gnu because this guy flashed her across the hall...but imma deal with him becuz thats sick

[SexyNneka]

this so sad... i hoe that this young lady finds the help that see needs. Nobody should be subjected to this type of abuse. my prayers are with her.

[ttdean]

No one should subject themselves to this or any type of abuse. Love does not hurt. Just because he has what appears to be jealousy, does not mean he loves you so much, it means he's CRAZY! A man beating down a woman, means he hates his own mother, has severe emotional issues and uses a woman to make himself feel like what he THINKS a man should feel like. He is very unstable and incapable of respecting you or loving you because he does not know how to filter his own emotions, does not love self

[DwayneMuziq]

cool video

[monica24b]

I'm glad I could see this live, and find out what happened after she went down to the station.

People if you haven't been to a Tonyatko live broadcast, you are definitely missing out.

[ladylover313]

i was there 2nd

[mrtvman]

cool