Zero Punctuation: Splinter Cell: Conviction

[JnKa801]

those dunce hats should really have "p" for "punce" on them

[Hesusio]

Chaos Theory has been the last good Splinter Cell game. The rest have sucked big hairy elephant 'nads.

[eggertstwart]

I haven't played the game, but my immediate reaction to "why would you want a silenced machine gun, when the starting pistol fires as fast as your index finger will allow and has infinite ammo" was that it would obviously be to shoot faster than your index finger will allow.

[MisterPeople25]

Ubisoft bought Tom Clancy as a title a while ago. So he has nothing to do with the games.

[nfsm07]

A bad case of dead..... son of a bitch! why didn't i think of that one before!

[Slipdax]

Deniable ops is the best part of the game

[jason4852]

ha his comments about america are pritty funny considering youtube is an american site plus most of the games he reviews are american...just sayin we dont make fun of his little shithole why make fun of ours? comedic value? not to funny in my opinion

[ParanoidEngineer]

@jason4852 It's a very cynical style of humour, you love it or hate it. I like it, and I don't appriciate being told my country is a "little shithole".

[jason4852]

@ParanoidEngineer yeah i didnt eather but its all in good fun on his part so whatever lol just sayin their are some jokes like im shure there is for everybody that just dont seem funny and or overused.

[Aidanownz]

@jason4852 America has it's good and bad points, as does Britain, so leave the outright abuse and lighten up, Yahtzee's sarcastic decapitation of everything and everyone are what makes him entertaining, stop taking it so personally.

[jason4852]

@Aidanownz well i do take it personally because i love america and alot of people have died for it, im in the americas military maby thats why...or maby its because alot of people find it not so funny that america jokes are geting old and dont make much sence at times, but i should leave the outright abuse? what if im just being sarcastic like yahtzee? seems like your taking my comment to personally lol

[Aidanownz]

@jason4852 You think I don't respect that a lot of people have died for America? Your 'sarcastic' comment was neither original nor funny, sarcasm is an art, not everyone can pull it off. Yahtzee is a master. I'm not offended by your comment, not at all, but I know that a lot of people might be, so I'm trying to prevent a 'my country is best' war between UK and US users, okay? Respect for your career btw, I'm hoping to join up too (obviously not the US though). What branch are you in?

[jason4852]

@Aidanownz well theres an obvious difference in opinions you say yahtzee is a master yet people still get offended by his comments he only gets around 20- 50K views on his videos and people talk about how unfunny he is all the time maby im a master it all depends on opinion, but im going in the Marine Core my date to ship to paris island is november 19th

[loudman12]

@jason4852 he gets a average of 3 million views on the escapist website every week

[Silverknight16]

@jason4852 So, just to clarify: you're getting your panties in a bunch because of some dude on the internet cracking a joke at the US. Ahaha, oh man, you're gonna have a lot of fun in basic training. Let me know when you wash out.

[jason4852]

@Silverknight16 lmao obvious troll is obvious

[Usul573]

I hear every single argument against Conviction, but I personally had a great time playing it and didn't find anything about it that annoying or anything.

Yes, it's not exactly the classic Splinter Cell formula, and I loved the first three games but I feel three games like that might be enough, at least for now.

[aidanivesdavis]

The ape analogy with America is so fucking funny.

[xFortune104]

Lets just face it: no game is as good as hungry hungry hippos...

And Hitman BM

[TheRaggetyDoctor]

@xFortune104 your half right. but which half?

[naToGeHbI4]

What do you think about new Deus Ex game?

[Usul573]

@naToGeHbI4

Yahtzee? Check the website he puts videos on.

[BWGgy]

Giving, free heath care is taking/stealing from tax payers, you FOOLS!

[PSshadow92]

I am an American and I completely agree.

[LOTO202]

Yahtzee compares game characters to shaved bears quite often.

[bboythekidstudios]

0:30 0:41: I could not have made a better comparison! XD

[jmar4life]

glad to know this sc is the same as the others

[ThePoltergust5000]

The fact that I'm Canadian and I agree with his thoughts on Montreal, feels kind of strange.

[TheTigerStrike]

@ThePoltergust5000 Well, we can all agree that the Québécois are assholes

[sladikk]

@ThePoltergust5000 So does the fact that I'm American and that I can't deny his thoughts on America.

Nice username, by the way. Luigi's Mansion was my first game 10 years ago, when it first came out.

[TeaUnicorn]

@ThePoltergust5000 I'm Canadian too, \I think its mostly because we find Quebec kinda annoying. The bilingual thing is annoying, and I don't know why its french when France colonized Canada as well as the Brits. Why not have our second language some aboriginal language? Then it would make sense.

[nasanasa3]

@ThePoltergust5000 If you're from any part of canada that's not quebac (or some parts of new brunswick) it's completely justified my man.

[nasanasa3]

@nasanasa3 *Quebec

[olly123451]

@ThePoltergust5000 Try being australian, i cannot defend my country in any way shape or form because 90% of us are assholes.

[GShepardP]

@ThePoltergust5000 Not if you're not French

[BuzzBombBmx]

He could have mentioned the co-op...

[PennanJr]

@BuzzBombBmx He never talks about multiplayer for reasons he have said in many videos -_-

[Whootirule]

@PennanJr He only ignores online multiplayer, wheras co-op he usually mentions too.

[PennanJr]

@Whootirule Only if it's split-screen.

[Whootirule]

@PennanJr I thought the co-op in Convictions WAS split-screen. If not, my bad, I haven't played it much.

[xRocketzFighterx]

press "B" (raspberry) dead.

[juangarcia2007]

Fuck that lets go shoot at him!! LOL

[baldian3]

i prefer hitman 2 silent assassin for the ps2

[masterkeyify]

Hey can we go just one episode without hating on america or any countries in general?

There are people who watch your videos who live there you know.

[Setdeer]

@masterkeyify Why would he do that? It is a nice bit of humor.



[chainsawmonk]

@masterkeyify

ur such a wimpy bitch



[masterkeyify]

@chainsawmonk Go away

[chainsawmonk]

@masterkeyify

lol

still a wimpy bitch

[Bluestudio555]

@masterkeyify I live in America and I would like to kindly ask you to fuck off. Pussy. I'm sure the rest of the world agrees. If you can't take a joke because your upset that he made it about your country then you should stop watching entertaining things and put on E and watch Toddlers in Tiaras or the View. That's what women watch, right?

[SecuR0M]

@masterkeyify Are you even American, lol?

[Papped1710]

@masterkeyify and he lives in australia and criticises the politics/culture there. People criticise countries because none are perfect and all have parts that no-one likes to acknowledge (britains class system, america's right wing bible bashers etc.) To deny that is to be a fool and to have a go at other people for not thinking this foolish thought is to be a twat. I'll also point out whilst he does criticise america it's more how their games always show america as the 'noble heroes' v the rest

[guntotingtomcat]

@masterkeyify

Out of the developed nations of the world America is worst , not because many of you are dumb anti-scientists who hate logic (though many of you are) but because you have a near religious belief in your own superiority, which manifests as an extremely ugly form of self aggrandized bigoted patriotism.

Let Obama give you free healthcare, admit that the invasion of Iraq was unnecessary and stop letting teachers teach the bible in biology and then I'll admit that America is alright.

[masterkeyify]

@guntotingtomcat Most of that was stereotyping.

Dumb anti-scientists? Yes because every person is exactly the same in a country. If I go to Britain, they will all be highly-educated rich geniuses, right?

Superiority? I consider most developed nations to be very similar. America is not the best.

Patriotism? This would explain the fact that the school I go to hasn't said the pledge in decades?

Iraq was a waste, teachers don't teach the bible, and they already passed healthcare.

[guntotingtomcat]

@masterkeyify

My points were not a personal slight against you. I was just giving you reasons why one might justifiably make fun of America generally. E.g. the anti-science brigade are the ones in power. A very large proportion of the republican party refuse to believe 1 in global warming and 2 that homosexuality is a choice, despite overwhelming scientific evidence.

As for the patriotism and superiority, I can only go by the Americans I have met at my university (a fair few) and they all...

[masterkeyify]

@guntotingtomcat Yes and any normal person can see that. If you have people at your university that are American dicks, then make fun of them. It's quite annoying to hear everywhere about how awful we Americans are and how awesome Brits/Canadians/Australians/et­c. are.

Judging people based on a political party that only exists to go against the other, which by nature will accept homosexuality, science and common sense, just makes no sense.

[guntotingtomcat]

@masterkeyify

Final point. I'm mocking America as a country in general, as compared to other countries. Not you.

[guntotingtomcat]

@masterkeyify

...arbitrarily believe that the constitution is inflexible and they implicitly suggest that America is the best country in the world. The same thing is present on fox news and in the government who are renowned for having a terrible and imperious foreign policy.

Your healthcare has improved, but you are still behind many nations in that it is not free in many circumstances, with poor uninsured patients still not receiving life saving treatments for many conditions...

[guntotingtomcat]

@masterkeyify

Finally, yes, some teachers still teach intelligent design along side the theory of evolution as an alternative theory at the discretion of some teachers.

[snakeinthereeds]

@guntotingtomcat that's messed up :D

[Mikedahunter777]

lol good horsy

[hill506]

Ya, the older versions were better than conviction.

[DonalNovak]

@hill506 I don't know about you but i hated Splinter cell Pandora tomorrow, which is the only one i played, people said the others were better

[lylatfox4]

@DonalNovak

chaos theory, known as the best in teh series, and i completely agree

[wjbarron88]

"Press B, pbbt dead."

[CaitiVoltaire]

Wait what, MGS is a superior stealth game? You must be from some sort of parallell universe where it isn't an over-wordy collection of unskippable cutscenes pretentiously pretending to be a game.

[Starioshka]

D: splinter cell is GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDDD

[slayermate07]

@Starioshka ... for retardddddddddddddddssss

[Starioshka]

@slayermate07 oh you don't like stealth games mw2 fffffffffffaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannn­nnnbooooooooooyyyy!!!

[slayermate07]

@Starioshka lol you are the one defending one of the most overrated piece of shit ever created, and you call me a 'fanboy'? ahahaha, and i do like stealth games like thief, mgs ect. That is 'GOOD' stealth games, not the half assed gears of war knock off that is conviction. Come back when you get a brain and preferably a personality, MR montreal fanboy.

[Starioshka]

@slayermate07 lol overated. Why you hate it when you didn't even play it?

[sajdo2]

why did you dis my name=(

[DeM0555]

I sold my splinter cell conviction after beating single and co-op campaign. Thees not much else to do after that

[Gamesta95]

i actually bought this game ages ago and thought it was awesome...until yahtzee pointed out all the flaws in it that i somehow overlooked, perhaps i was being distracted by the senseless need to shoot every living thing in front of you

[ATLMember]

@Gamesta95 Splinter Cell conviction is a great game, and it's highly critically acclaimed. Of course you shoot people, that's what shooters are about. If you miss old splinter cell games where you need to wait 10 minutes for a guard to walk by then move to the next door frame and repeat then sure. Look at a review from IGN or gamespot.

[Gamesta95]

@ATLMember I agree its a great game, but i coudlnt give a crap about who acclaims it. Isnt the splinter cell series meant to be stealth games? they made the rainbow 6 series for the shooter element. And i do miss those, cause i had an excuse to go ballistic with grenades....although that goes against what im saying, if you have an excuse, then go for it

[chrissomerry]

@Gamesta95 Just because someone points out a flaw doesn't mean you have to stop liking it no matter how coherent and logical their case ;) (assuming you don't like it anymore that is!).

[Gamesta95]

@chrissomerry i didnt say i stopped liking it, just that i liked going on random killing sprees.