Sex and Love: Stop verbal abuse - save your relationship

[EyeshadowCult]

I have been trying my best to do these things, but when I do I only agitate that person even more. It's almost as if me saying "I would probably react the same way as you are" is saying "Fuck your mother". It makes him go off more. I go as far as even apologizing when I should be the one getting an apology. Nothing works anymore. I really wanted to bring happiness to him but somehow, I failed.

[joannak912]

"Before you can make anything better, you have to stop making it worse." That's a great line.. not just for relationships in which one partner or the other is disordered, but for any relationship.

[hpdinme]

I like that: Before you can make anything better... You must stop making it worse.

I had begin to learn better communication techniques as you mention (& others) and they did help... They can solve everything but it does help.

Now that I am out I still use those techniques as a natural process when talking to others. To better understand what they may be saying and feeling, to show them I do genuinely care and to promote a better 2-way communication. It works. But you have to make it better.