Woman tells the future by looking at asparagus

[MedQ]

wait.. Muahauahahaha :)

[IAmRickyC]

Ahahahahahahahahahhahahaha

[iamsomint]

she predicted that it would rain in England? great

[O0oSorousho0O]

At 0:40, she

watch?v=gAYL5H46QnQ

[orreborre85]

You are supposed to cook them and eat them!

[adamardoin13]

dumbassssss bitch

[Edgebotv4]

didnt she get the memo your supposed to use BONES for this

[lupischuckle]

But, did she predict her being ridiculed on YouTube?

[Melancholy43920]

It also suggests that you just threw asparagus on the fucking ground..

[fannyslapper33]

The world would be smarter/better if we replaced christians with her.

[SicilianGunner]

asparagus makes my pee smell

[Dark8Empress]

Wait, why isnt she on the weather channel?

[Dark8Empress]

This is funnier than any stand up act Ive ever seen. Dying of laughter!

[GENERALJONJON]

good thing she is here to tell us these things

[ozziedoggy14]

if i met her i'd eat her asparagus'

[artilleryboy1]

What a load of bullshit

[meaghanrachel]

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA­AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA­HA

[Scheeno]

i wonder how long it took her to figure out the magical powers of asparagus. Her childhood must've sucked giant fungile toe jam

[MisterThomasPAINE2]

From this second forth I shall be known as Lettuce Head and I shall predict the future in a bowl of mesclun greens with some cherry tomatos, black olives, feta cheese and pine nuts, topped with a buttermilk ranch dressing and some diced boiled egg. Add salt and pepper to taste.

[hollyboo21]

@MisterThomasPAINE2 The future sounds tasty. Delish, even :))

[lanceand]

To be fair, she did say "in the foreseeable future". She missed the severe frosts and snowfall simply because she wasn't forseeing very far. Using white asparagus would have helped.

[MrVirusVenom]

2 words! "Nut Job"

[Torrent671]

Ha, you Brits wont have any problem with frost or snow? How are you guys enjoying that blizzard?

[Somai82]

These manipulating con jobs need to be charged and isolated from society.

[Retard237421]

I can do that with my penis. All you do is play with it, maybe throw it down on a bed spread then pretty soon it'll be summer.

[MERSLK230]

I can predict the future too, she will die from heart disease.

[bobmamipoko]

dumb fuck.

[username132]

This is fucking hilarious! Where is all the hate coming from? Asparomancer for Prime Minister!

[SophieWilliamz]

♡ NEW TO THE BEAUTY WORLD...

My name is Sophie, check out my videos

[nunu10000]

Videos like these will be all we're left with for entertainment if Lamar Smith passes his Internet crippling bills, like SOPA and PIPA.

[5holay]

David Duke will be proud of this WHITE woman's POWER to predict.

[IamMclov1n25]

is she retarded?

[afglhr]

someone tell this fucking ugly whore cunt bastard to shut the fuck up

[Compendium34]

@afglhr Shut the fuck up you ugly whore cunt bastard.

[mack2036]

I have the strangest erection right now.

[danieltorres10]

suck my dick bitch!

[BarEnFaroth]

This technique helped me win the lotto - simply by watching this video I got so bored I had to go to the shops to kill some time. Bought a ticket, and won €2! Boo-yah!

[TheBoggiemand]

what can i say..total stupid...try not to do this with your aspargus at home !

[J0rdanPack]

I'm dying.

[qanatuka]

start using cucumbers and we may have a show

[ItsLiiLii]

Seems legit.

[bobsmith]

I hear the weather channel makes some good predictions also..

[Brettah31]

oh my god this was funny. I can't stopw watching her cast the asparagus! So good!

[lash69]

hahahahahhahahahaha what next?

[frosted1030]

So, how many specific predictions does she make, and what percentage of them are 100% accurate? If she is so good, why didn't she predict 9/11?

[lceus]

I predict WW3 in spring 2012. Come at me.

[fwilliams1992]

My name is Jemima Packington and I'm fucking mental

[InFaDeLiTy]

I predict we will make more advancements in technology.

And we will discover new planets.

That tomorrow is going to be sunday.

[regemo]

Can she tell me we will have a base on the moon, when the republicans will ever have a serious candidate, when we will run out of fossil fuels, and when my car is finally going to break down?

[SamjTeleVision]

guys come on, we all have different beliefs and eve though some may be different than yours doesn't mean you have to go hate on it. at the least have some respect.

[laflugantabastardo]

@SamjTeleVision

We'll hate on it as much as we want to. Free speech, yay!

[LunchAnderson]

@SamjTeleVision Respect the belief that you can predict the future by throwing out asparaguses on a piece of cloth? Haha, no. That would mean that I respect stupidity.

[ThePhatIndian]

"Which means I make predictions using asparagus"... no British irony detected...

lolwut

[Matat]

56 years old and she's still playing with her food. Now that is just sad.

[happyidiottalk]

Anyone care to explain the mechanism for sending information back in time via the mechanism of a cultivated vegetable. This woman is deranged, if you believe her you're an idiot.

[karlwilzen]

She just described the last winter....

[TiMidSaRce]

I'd like to see her in a room with Chuck Norris.

[ibullpitt]

I predict that she's full of shit.

[TheRantingsofaMadman]

Do you understand what physics is? If you do then you see what the placement of the asparagus actually is, if not then you probably think this is legit. If you don't know why the asparagus fell the way it did please pick up a f*cking text book and learn something about how things work in reality!

[sizzle9000]

You all laugh. You all scoff. But some day, we'll look back to Mystic Jemima Packington and think, "We should have listened to the asparagus."

[CuddlyBadger]

@sizzle9000 I'M listening to the asparagus.

[CarletonSaw]

I love asparagus.. but that is not how it is done.

[sodalis]

I predict lots of down-votes.

[tpaladino]

@sodalis Have you been talking to the asparagus too?

[snifferdogx]

Shameless charlatan. Hasn't this prediction of hers been proven wrong already, anyway?

[IIHypeII]

lol.

[jmclarke1]

What a load of BS

[Newreligion100]

I swear this entire world is going cuckoo

[halleyscomet]

I suppose that's as accurate a method as Pat Robertson claiming his schizophrenia is really God talking to him.

[Danthemanhan]

Bull. Fucking. Shit. Either you believe your own crap and you're a moron, or you're a shameless liar. Either way, fuck you.

[witchietaitai]

You know, if you say "Oranges" very slowly, it sounds like "gullible".

[Ayria]

This field needs more snow. Like... two cubic tons.

[Delurseytu]

Hmmmm, I don't like that weather. Could you throw them again please?

[Stimpackman]

Im on the weird part of youtube again.......

[Madulamblongata]

Forget those carrot cards, apparently asparagus is the way to go. Those cards, they're called carrot cards right?

[Forssa1]

MAXIMUM TROLLING!

[meng0is0great]

I have a pumpernickel bagel in my hands and it says I'm probably not gonna be hungry for a while, possibly not for the rest of the night.

[R0WMaC]

@meng0is0great ll0l0lll00l

[meng0is0great]

@R0WMaC ???

[R0WMaC]

@meng0is0great ur comment about ur pumpernickel bagel made me lol :D

[devilcat616]

I think she confused Asparamancer with Aspergers.

[palfrensis]

Just some aspara-gusts, then. Get it! Ha! Oh...

[signboyy]

she uses asparagus to tell the future but never ever eats it. only big macs for her.

[alexkillsdie]

the world needs less of this crap.

[gearlockT]

@alexkillsdie my thoughts exactly.

[Magnosious]

She seems like a sweet person even if she can summon the powers of asparagus.

[kittygoesmeoxw]

ITS FUCKING GLOOMY OUTSIDE OF COURSE ITS GOING TO RAIN MY GOD WOMAN.

[SeparateisntEqual]

I find this REALLY OFFENSIVE. What about the prediction powers of BROCCOLI?!? Broccoli is right WAY MORE OFTEN than stupid asparagus. Pfft.

[Ttoby89]

I just want to listen to her predict nonsense in her lovely voice.

[Beeht]

To all the people who belong to any religion watching this right now who are saying how stupid and ridiculous this is. This is how the non-religious view you. To which you might be thinking, "No, my beliefs are different because my God is real." No, your beliefs are no different than hers. You are just as stupid and ridiculous as you believe this woman to be.

[Hil2281]

She predicted rain in England! HOW DOES SHE DO IT?!?

[afglhr]

@Hil2281 strangly, it doesn't rain that much in England dumbass...

[marcus210896]

@Hil2281 at the TV!

[chariotdrvr14]

How can you *dislike* this? ...funniest s**t I've heard all day.

It should be an SNL skit.

[Prospero761]

I predict her pee smells funny.

[Connah126]

That bitch made it rain with asparagus...literally

[guavaaaa]

This is so funny.

[SAMagic]

Even a broken clock is right twice a day.

[martenfr]

Why not from peanuts?

[Legendation]

That asparagus should be in a pot boiling and cooking. Judging the way it looks, my prediction is that you should be in a kitchen!

[Deceptitron]

she's using ancient alien technology

[puttymctang]

call the CIA we have a threat on our hands..

[pavilion130]

BURN THE WITCH !!!!!

[Derail07]

Women are absolutely worthless

[tayboox33]

@Derail07 If women were worthless, then you wouldn't be here.

[Derail07]

I bet her genatal warts resemble asparagus

[SilentTv1]

yeahhh i made it 70 dislikes the video really is terrible

[winters0123]

No snow in the UK in the near future? Wow, really needed asparagus to call that one. All the other predictions were made when they were almost certain to become true.

[MikeyJohnno]

Attention seeker.

[greekpa2]

id tap that

[iTech247]

WHAT A FUCKING IDIOT

[j0hNyPz]

bitch

[deejaygal]

Emm, is this woman for real or what?

[joexies]

what the bloody hell

[BilligPojke]

Jon Mills I have been following you and I really admire your gift. Could you please tell me who win SC2 world cup?? I have alot of coins on gosugamers that I want to bet. PLEASE

[shanustheanus]

HAHAAHAHAA! OMFG! This is ridiculous! Has anybody else read the description? She predicted the demise of Gordon Brown! Who fucking didn't? It also says she predicted the Kings Speech would win an Oscar! Now if a well received classy period drama, beat all the odds and somehow won an Oscar, because as we all knew the film had no chance, she must know her stuff. Fuck me. Who believes this shite?

[ivnhdz]

ARE YOU A FUCKING RETARD?

[0lidinh0]

WRONG ABOUT THE SNOW! THERE'S SHIT LOADS

NICE 1.23 MINUTES OF FAME DARLING!

[brassy2011]

she looked on the news?

[RailLine8]

Bitch the kitchen is Indoors not outdoors.

[alexfinlayson]

She watched the weather report and then threw around some asparagus!

[HiJaayD]

r u fucking kidding me

[BrickVsJaw]

Some rain, some fog, not much snow?! It's pretty much like that every year in Britain..

[jeff7829]

OMG I CAN DO THE SAME THING.

[nukebomb24]

Bitch, does that look like a kitchen?

[Shadowkirby64000]

I turned up my volume real loud to hear her.... then someone called me on skype.

[justroll]

@Shadowkirby64000 I remember when I used to hear that fucking scream alert thingy from Kaspersky I used to shit may pants almost 20 times a day. xDD

[jekobpl]

Anyone can predict UKs weather

Autumn,Winter,Spring - cold and windy

Summer - hot as fuck!

[dumbchildmusic]

please let it be trolling

[benevolentian]

Imagine that on the weather channel...

[MrUBtrollin2]

WHAT A TWIST!

[xtigerlily07x]

Yes I often make predictions too but with celery...

[Speekerful]

Who knows, she could of watched the weather forecast before this little asparagus situation.

[tommypople]

This woman just watched the weather forcast

[123A1n1t1h1o1n1y123]

what a twat

[azalias114]

@TheAnimeStop how does this make her a slut? It just makes her crazy

[Etherouge]

People like this were not given enough attention in their young years. They seek to fulfill their need to be noticed and feel important though ridiculous shenanigans such as this. They convince themselves. They bury that burning edge of doubt in the sand and never look back.

I feel sorry for people like this.

[TheAnimeStop]

Someone needs to just walk up to her and truck slap her...flipping slut.

[twimanable]

.....

[happyboi7]

*Sigh*

I can make that prediction myself.........

WITHOUT THE ASPARAGUS!

[evilchimpmunk566]

oxygen thief

[Dillpickle1O]

I thought hurricane season was over!

[ailedbyfate]

She belongs on Penn and Tellers: Bullshit

[thevikingwarrior11]

I swear for a second this was actually a sketch written by John Cleese.

[AZN5543]

she needs to stop smoking that crazy shit

[Philsta333]

k I'd like to see her prediction number 6 for this year comes to fruition...

Apparently (and I quote) "An animal will win an acting award."

That would be awesome amirite?

[DubbleTakes]

Looks like a wizard. Except for that watch. Wizards don't wear watches.

[AngryJoint]

holy shit I almost died just by reading the title then 3-4 seconds later seeing that woman asparagus :P

[SlotMachineRape]

Asparagus makes your piss smell funny.

[Tincturas3]

what the fuck is up with people

[soozmct]

@Tincturas3I had a bad day till I read this comment I just love this comment! Fantastic. Killing myself here on the couch- I dont know WTF is up with people. People are nuts! Theres no understandin 'em

[MrSertmert]

ha ha fuckin ha



[faboolusbacon]

CUT

its fading away on my palm again

[CreativePotion]

Where the hell am I?

People do the craziest things.

[vaidesss]

Should be a new class to play in world of warcraft... I want to play a lvl 85 Night Elf Asparamancer!

[anklepantsmagazine]

"We're gonna have some weather."

[SkateIslam]

We are gonna have some rain, some snow, some wind, some sun, and clouds...

[ProfessorJakeB]

This lady is a crack-pot!

[timmuffin]

BostonDrunks sent me here



[TheGormanZone]

I also use asparagus to make prediction. My prediction is your urine smells weird after eating asparagus. If my prediction is wrong, you can strip off my title. hahaha!

[cantrips]

HAHAHAH Oh my god...Asparamancer...I think I just inhaled my tongue

[jknighti1]

her skills are uncanny

[DGOMartin]

This video is clearly fake, the aspargus werent fresh

[lalalalala3337]

anyone can look at asparagus and say random stuff and tell people that they just predicted the future. FAKE

[originalganjsta]

She just told you what any weatherman could..

[lmaolongtime1120]

It's asparagus.

[MrBniz]

How can people believe this junk lmao. Its carrots that tell the future DUH!

[sl1xx]

Legend!

[SpellignMistake]

Asparagus makes your pee smell.

Pro tip for life.

[RomanVLX]

The Nintendo XL and 3DS would blow her mind.

[eduardtoth]

I can tell you the future by looking at my penis .