Parents Keep Deceased Son's Memory Alive Through His Awful Tumblr

[eggnogfrog]

i'm in love with Jean Ann Whorton

[UpoundBUTTS]

Megyn Kelly

[TheFuzzyLucario]

Ahh, those shitbirds. XD

[FrizzySpackleroni]

The gravestone bit is a riot!

[aslacuentayya]

Could anyone explain what a "shitbird" is pls.

[ElongatedVowels]

@aslacuentayya "A completely useless individual who is unaware of his/her own complete uselessness."

[PFplusW]

I think I popped a vain .. XD Who cares!?

[SylvanaForrester]

Is shitbird a thing? Never heard that term before.

[kendallkind]

the dada is my uncle! go frank!

[HanHanFilms]

>mfw people still think The Onion is serious

[remixowns]

this is fucking disgusting, you sick freak parents

[kratos4evr]

@remixowns it's not real.. are you retarded.. ITS THE ONION!!! Lmao

[jussts]

@remixowns LET THEM GRIEVE IN THEIR OWN WAY!!1

[earthfae86]

It's funny cause the actors are so good that people really think it's serious. The onion is pure genius lmao

[008DREW]

"Is this REAL!?", "You guyz know this is fake, right? I'm smart cuz I know this." - Most comments on The Onion.

[quidnick]

Last comment before I die: lol wut.

[Mulletboi86]

seriously guys, where do they find these actors/actress? Seems very legit.

[TheSirQueefington]

"Brother keeps deceased brothers spirit alive by binding his soul to a suit of armor"

[sumofsumstuff]

@TheSirQueefington is that one of the quests

[charlesnotprince]

Beyond the Facts -- that's where the true analysis begins!

[LadySinsReal]

O.o this shit blows my mind and its all real and everything how fucked up

[stealer111]

@LadySinsReal LOL, ur like 10 years old arent u?

[4950eug]

Unfortunate "shitbirds" however - it can't be much fun seeing yourself posted to this gobshite facebook. Maybe mom & dad ought to just get on with their own grieving process and leave the "shitbird" finger pointing die the natural death it deserves.........

[MARIOFREAK821]

@4950eug You're pretty slow, aren't you?

[Adam12088]

Tumblr is for faggots

[InsanityOnABunFilms]

The view count right now is 113,337 .... LLEEET.... LEET haha that's awesome!

[ssjbrolly3]

@InsanityOnABunFilms stop being a shitbird

[eggnogfrog]

jean ann whorton is so fine.

[MrDonkavitch]

It's more reliable than fox news

[burtontoker]

LMFAO THIS IS TERRIBLE! BUT SOOO DAMN FUNNY! BAHAHA XD

[gamerunknown]

Oh I remember where shitbird was from, tropic thunder.

[hiothezebra]

Who else googled shitbirds shitbirds everywhere and was surprised that it exists?

[jnthnbush]

@hiothezebra its in the friggin description.

[UrMomalex]

1. shitbird 408 up, 37 down

A completely useless individual who is unaware of his/her own complete uselessness.

[benplotke]

This type of behavior is actually typical of grieving parents. There is an organization for them called compassionate friends. They sound exactly like this. I liked the tombstones.

[InsanityOnABunFilms]

@benplotke this is fake...

[Criemer7]

Shitbirds.Shitbirds.Everywhere­.

[Woochaga]

I look like a shitbird. :(

[jebuko1]

shitbird: yaknow, birdshit except different

[Shamidey]

shitbirds, mr. lahey

[canufi]

@Shamidey shithawks

[AyKayFoTeeSeVen]

I'm glad my Tumblr account is classy

[odd0odium]

Do you think Jean Anne Whorton from "Beyond The Facts" and Tracy Gill on "Today Now" are related? They look very similar it's crazy.

[lexxypexxy]

Onion always has such good actors

[ShampooAndCondition]

Not the onion's best work by any means. Boring skit.

[Denamic]

@ShampooAndCondition You're such a shitbird.

[ArminPr]

LOL guy looks like he is 20 not 16 :S

[VEPHAR]

wtf??



[BlackiDaIraqi1]

The things at the end of shoelaces are called aglets....bless his soul

[TheNineinchsnails]

since this guys death, I am now the only dude with a tumblr

[ATLine1]

IS THIS REAL? LOL

[Blankname101]

@ATLine1 Nope,but they are good at what they do lol

[wwwpwndcom]

A shitbird is somebody who is too useless to Google the meaning of shitbird.

[RastafarianSkond]

soo obviously fake lol..

[mjnelson91]

...I still don't know what a shitbird is, even after browsing the tumblr a bit...

[otheus]

Tombstone at 1:17. Classic!

[Fangtorn]

I think the bald dude was in an episode of the west wing.

[djth3t4ank]

They totally got the shitbirds thing from Trailer Park Boys!

[TC78obsessed]

"Pooping and updating Facebook status. The internet is great." My tombstone

[Davve941018]

1:08

If that was implemented, I'm sure that tombstones saying things like "I'm on my way to work LOL, there's a big truck going extremely fast behind me ROFL" would start appearing.

[SocaTrain]

lmfaoooooooo

[MrYBI3]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

Your son is dead

And I laugh at you

[hattrickster33]

These actors are better than the guys on some commercials lol

[alfredoking14]

hahaha has everyone seen the actual tumblr. its pretty great.

[Masterbaitor]

**********ATTENTION***********­** ALL SHITBIRDS UNITE **********ATTENTION***********

We Will form the SHITBIRD ARMY!! and take on all non-shitbirds... defeating them to reign over the earth and crush those who currently hold the power... haha haha haha

[flabbyballsack]

@Masterbaitor Do you remember that time you attempted to be funny? I do.

[gmanx95]

@Masterbaitor you will not get top comment with this. nice try.

[PimpMuSick]

Did anyone else read "Geoff Patterson" and immediately think of "Geoff Peterson", Craig Ferguson's robot-skeleton?

[NickyAmerica]

But then, The Tumblr Profile was taken down...

because trolls hacked it.

[sweatersexx]

is this legit? hahahaha

[Wiggyify]

whats a shitbird?! LOL :D:D

[pavlezeljic2]

A completely useless individual who is unaware of his/her own complete uselessness.

[johan404]

@Wiggyify shitbird = A completely useless individual who is unaware of his/her own complete uselessness.

[BrendanIsCool]

@Wiggyify you apparently

[Horus515]

@Wiggyify a big shitty bird that swoops down and puts poop on you and carries you away back to its big shitty nest.

[theapollomoonlanding]

Stupid!

[atomsmasher55]

u guys do know the onion is a big lie right. all the stuff is fake

[Aardvarked88]

@atomsmasher55 It's called satire, genius.

[w9j15g]

@atomsmasher55 Yeah, right. You libtards say the same shit about Fox News cuz u can't handle the truth!

[atomsmasher55]

@w9j15g no my school did a whole project on how to know if a web site is good or is bull shit and the onion is a site that is proven to be fake and it was on the new that it was fake so shut the fuck up noooobbb

[TheSpacegamer]

@atomsmasher55 Please tell me you're not serious...

[TheEric1203]

@atomsmasher55 you do realize that the whole point of Onion is to mock today's media right? That the stuff they post is supposed to be fake and heavily sarcastic?

[06Perseus]

@w9j15g I hope you're joking. How in the WORLD could ANYONE believe this is real? The parents would maybe even be arrested for cyber-bullying. Because if you didn't know, its illegal to post pictures like that of someone on the internet without permission. Dumbass.

[w9j15g]

@06Perseus You are cyber-bullying me by calling me a dumbass. Libtard.

[06Perseus]

@w9j15g you said fuck. Its really no difference. And you just called me a libtard,

cyber-bully ;)

[sarahm59]

@w9j15g the onion is a satire magazine/site. it says so right there. this is not in dispute.

[w9j15g]

@sarahm59 Do you believe everything you read?

[zcdarktide]

@w9j15g yes

[TheCakingGirl]

that's kinda cute what they're doing :)

[OneWarmDragon]

Update his status?! .."cold,dark and "earthy", just like yesterday..."

[InsanityOnABunFilms]

@OneWarmDragon lol you know these are fake right... learn the internet

[OneWarmDragon]

@InsanityOnABunFilms most people understand my quip as humor....

[batboy62]

Awwww! I wish those were my parents :)

[harry6757]

.making fun of retarded people makes you a shitbird. Get IT!!!

[Andy32268]

The reporter's last name s Whorton XD

[Wallylex]

I don't know whether to laugh or cry... :-S

[Gosox2525]

@NeverMind9132 an aglet

[NeverMind9132]

Wow but seriously... what ARE those things on the end of shoelaces called??

[TARINunit9]

@NeverMind9132

Aglets. Seriously, they're called aglets

[NeverMind9132]

@TARINunit9 You must be the Jesus of random knowledge.

[attackzac21]

I got

"guys! I think im getting to the water monster part on amnesia!"

on my sons gravestone.

[Offended83Shadow]

so the onn decided to only cater its humor to 13 year old boys since going to IFC. Well, i'm done. unsubbed. yea i know no one gives a fuck but

[chaosstarr]

@Offended83Shadow whats the ifc

[Offended83Shadow]

@chaosstarr the channel that hosts the show on cable. same channel whitest kids u know are. since ONN went to tv its quality plummeted

[chaosstarr]

@Offended83Shadow oh ok i thought onion was just a youtube thing

[padfootpak]

@Offended83Shadow "since ONN went to tv its quality plummeted " TRUE

[BloodandRainbows]

Like if the first thing you did when you saw his name was search him on facebook.

[TheRedGynger]

lmao shit bird



[Looserkid13]

a dead friend of mine still has his blog updated. last time i checked he was trying to get a discount by joining a certain group that sells hardware. true story.

[LakASambooodee]

This just gave Collins a new definition of retardation.

[Filaxsan]

Great actors, really!

[MyBloodIsntRed]

Jean Anne Whorton

:pfftface:

[b0h3ma]

Either I have the best trolling follow up or the worst chain of idiots replying to my comment.

[DoubleAssClown]

@b0h3ma you're pretty gay apparently.

[TheLeongeds]

Nah, this must be fake...

[Imhornydadcomeinside]

@TheLeongeds Nah, it's heterosexual and real.

[TheLeongeds]

@Imhornydadcomeinside I honestly don't think so.

[Imhornydadcomeinside]

@TheLeongeds That's beacuse you're homosexual and gay.

[TheLeongeds]

@Imhornydadcomeinside Well, if I was gay I'd surely be homosexual... anything else?

[Imhornydadcomeinside]

@TheLeongeds Well gay can also be "lame" or "bad", so that depends. That was something else.

[TheLeongeds]

@Imhornydadcomeinside From the beginning, gay meant happy. Then it meant homosexual and now people use it as something bad. But I don't even care, what are you on about? :o Because I believe it to be fake, I'm bad? Or what?

[Imhornydadcomeinside]

@TheLeongeds The Onion is still serious news.

[Ozku9]

But the biggest shitbird is Geoff and his parents.

[zippomage]

am I the only one that isn't sad about this kid being dead?

[NeuronicPlague]

What in the world is a shitbird?

[empty1388]

b0h3ma is like the WBC, NO ONE LIKES HIM! including any real church... We dont condone rape...

-real churches

[Oddonan]

Digital comforting?

LOL

how can onion keep up making up good shitbird XD

[Tikikala]

wait, you mean onion is actually posting something factual and not fake like other news?

[Bbfishman]

wow that news anchor chick is really weird lookin. She looks like one of the Waynes brothers when they're dressed up in White Chicks. Shes a cross between a bird, a female and a cross dressing male

[juanniG]

@Bbfishman a bird or a shitbird?

[Bbfishman]

@juanniG hhaha touche

[rpadilla99ish]

51 people are shitbirds.

[MrBunnyWasHereFirst]

I love the fact that there is actually a link to the shitbird site. damn, there were some ugly shitbirds there.

[u0455294]

51 people love retarded hats.

[steelydrwu]

Just when I think I've grown cold and jaded to this horrible world something like this appears and reminds me of the preciousness of life. I have no Twitter or facebook or any of that but I am starting to question my decisions, maybe my life has been meaningless.

[SherryLaneify]

so evil <:D <:D

[efsq]

"he also left a significant web pressence" twitter: 21 followers. LOL

[SpecEdits]

@efsq hey, your a shitbird.

:D

[Kniitte]

Am I think only one who can't take this serious when I absolutely should? lol

[AgujaAzulMD]

@Kniitte Why should you...?

[Sephitron]

damn haha

[jeffh3962]

What a magnificent person. RIP Geoff. Fuck off, Shitbirds.

[CoHScrapper]

This video is funny and sad for me. I know some people who would actually do this type of stuff.

"Oh, my son/daughter had such an impact on Facebook/Twitter that their 190,562 friends ("friends" that they've never even met in REAL LIFE, they just accepted any random invite to create the illusion they had a mass social circle) would've wanted us to keep our son's/daughter's spirit alive by keeping up with the updates"

[aaronpolitical]

This is so sweet! *tear*

[TruthatCearcie]

lol

[xT3hPr0x]

@dantesinfernal0 What do you mean? That's a typically bad christian who only serves to draw the hatred of ignorant, stereotyping atheists. (I mean ignorant in their assessment of the average Christian, not ignorant because they aren't Christian =P)

[dantesinfernal0]

@xT3hPr0x That was a little thing I invented that I like to call "sarcasm." I'm hoping it catches on, but it's been a slow process. ;) lol

[xT3hPr0x]

@dantesinfernal0 lol I'm sarcastic all the time in person. On the internet though people are so stupid that it's often hard to tell when someone is being sarcastic or are just incredibly dense.

[snewso]

i love being a shitbird

[ObeseChess]

"cable is out... im bored this sux"

I can't stop fucking laughing.

[Whyamibzsdmh]

"He hated retarded hats so much"

I'm sorry, i can't stop laughing at this XD.

[midstarify]

lol

[Filipb2101]

*insert here* until I took an arrow to the knee.

[fatmaru]

seems legit



[Jeremiah2450]

Geoff died and never realized he was also a shitbird. Just a shitbird with snobby parents that wore abercrombie and Fitch and trolled the internet on his ipad.

[emperorsenshi]

this is hilarious and yet it's sad

[corwin11412]

RIP Geoff... upstairs hating retarded shit birds everywhere...

[StickManProductionss]

Poor guy ): he only had 21 followers on twitter

[TheSwanies]

"He hated retarded hats so much"

:D:D:D

[MatthewAllanE]

Geoff would have got sucha kick out of that fat shitbird!

[ArtypNk]

Changes frighten me and piss me off.

[hfzwoopah]

potato

[Maserati7200]

I love how the tumblr posts go back 4 months...

[fairtester]

Ggfhgg

[fairtester]

Ggfd

[fairtester]

Hghg

[fairtester]

Hi

[lntothe]

great actors!

[NobodysOffTheHook]

omg. rofl.

[iPriestHolmes]

this seems so f*cking real it's scary...

[12BobFed]

1:02 Stupid shitbird ....