Advice on Dumb Boyfriends, Going to College, and More

[taggrey]

"It seems to me that throwing up on another human being is not an act of friendship. It's kind of an act of... yuck." Yes John... unless you're Lara.

[TheSrk1797]

Dude your hair looks like Kramer's from Seinfeld.

[andyettosaythetruth]

giant squid of anger! it's ok my glasses fall off like that when I get excited too.

[Ferserious2]

"There's only a few things in this world that turn me into a giant squid of anger...." Another would be pennies.

[recklesstenacity]

every time john reminds us he doesn't wear pants at the computer i can't help but think of the nerdfighters in the UK. No, really. I don't know why that is...

[pienkunicorn]

what is irl?



[suicunesrider]

@pienkunicorn it means "in real life" =)

[NoRulesWithMakeUp]

If you eat a spoon full of raspberry jam I usually stop hiccups. Seems ridiculous but hey it works :) maybe it is a placebo effect.. hm..

[ummPOTATOZ]

Giant squid of anger = awesome man...XD

[NoRulesWithMakeUp]

John. I think I love you. I'm pretty sure of it actually.

[thatwhichisgiven]

You are my HERO.

[Yuliyathehorselover]

Omg...the fact that you like Michael Buckley...I think I love you even more now, if that was even possible

[StuckInTheClouds22]

I think I see six copies of Paper Towns in the back ground lol

[jennyish8675309]

This web site is no longer a thing :(

[WingsofStarlight]

ALL WRITING IS RE-WRITING.

[rikko338]

That jacket unfortunately covered the 'P' and the 'A' in pizza...

[fuzzheadwriter]

I am so sad that themountaingoatswillcureyourbi­eberfever is no longer an active site.

[stoabler]

ahh venn diagrams ;)

[stoabler]

ahh venn diagrams ;)

[nmcclain1996]

They got rid of the siiiiiiite ;A;

[chipiy172]

that venn diagram means that the only boys you don't want to date don't like smart girls, so if like a criminal or jackass of some sort is fine if they like smart girls

[19sexybexy94]

@chipiy172 I thought this, so I mentally amended it to 'is a donut shape' :)

[BeccyMalfoy]

My first Nerd-fighter encounter was because a girl was wearing a Pizza John at a Knowledge Bowl meet.

[smiletimes3]

This was posted on my birthday!

[Allyscribit]

"Maybe I'm just old-fashioned, but it seems to me that throwing up on someone isn't an act of friendship." Well said sir. But apparently, to your freshman brain, peeing on their bed was.

[LovableDork1]

I'm so glad I found these guys, I mean they like Sherlock and Doctor Who and They Might Be Giants and now I find out he likes TMGs too! jeepers youtube is great

[ellencradd10]

okay, "patience, grasshopper" & john's likening of everyday situations with venn diagrams are two definite TFIOS references. these have been over looked... UNTIL NOW!

[mustanglover12]

"Maybe I'm just old fashioned but it seems to me that throwing up on another human being is not an act of friendship. It's kind of an act of...yuck." hahaha oh john

[MissMcSpaz]

Wearing nerdfighter garb works.

I've found so many nerdfighter friends (okay two) because of the clothes. One of them is the best guy friend I've ever had. We never would've met if he hadn't worn his Nerdfighter shirt to calculus lecture. True story.

[Rithene]

Alas, John Sock. We shall all remember his brilliant life and his tragic death--mauled to death by a West Highland Terrier.

[hudsongirl95]

@Rithene Hank Sock: "Unfortunately, John sock is not with me today because he's dead."

Crowd: "Awww..."

Hank Sock: "Yeah, he was mauled to death by a West Highland Terrier."

*Crowd laughs*

Hank Sock: "Yeah, now it's funny. That was totally the reaction I was expecting."

[commenter2498]

but it doesn't work! the link. in the doobly-doo.

[cadisaurusrex]

Ah! The link won't work!

[thewolffromhell66666]

I'm trying to be a writer but need advice please help me

[4mayZing]

your puff levels are off the charts

[iliveinadaydream]

"Patience, grasshopper!" AAAAAAH. SO MANY TFIOS REFERENCES. :D

[xOliviax0919x]

Video suggestion #3 "How to Live Forever" (Hank)

Video suggestion #6 "You're Gonna Die" (John)

Just an observation.

[Diamondelight92]

Would you consider peeing on someone's bed an act of friendship? Huh, John? Huh?

[WebsterAnn]

I don't think it's still a website. It took me to a search for things dealing fibromyalgia. (sp?)

[kaikiyukionna27]

I CAN'T TAKE IT!!! Is he saying "an act of friendship" or "an active friendship"?!?

[Gawentel]

@kaikiyukionna27 act of...

[delusionaldiminutive]

God bless you John for saying that guys that have a problem with smart girls are not worth dating. The young girls need to hear this!!!! Also, the Mountain Goats will cure your Beiber Fever is the best idea ever!!!!

[doubleA1326]

2:57 might be one of my favorite lines in all of nerdfighteria.

[Lorenzio77]

“The Venn Diagram of boys who don’t like smart girls and boys you don’t wanna date, is a circle!” I love you John

[blondebunhead]

@Lorenzio77 Perhaps we know what part of TFioS he was writing when making this video ;)

[piercetheromans]

You have the best hair! Haha plus you're the best!

[ElectricPandemic]

Any sentence that contains the words "too smart" can immediately be disregarded as utter nonsense. Except that sentence and others expressing similar sentiments, or if you are talking about your opponent in a quiz or something. There is no such thing as too smart.

[magicsparklyunicorns]

@RiskeyBrothers, why not just release the book that needs a first book, and then later if you want you can write a prequel.

[DayglowWolf]

The Mountain Goats website isn't there anymore

[snowgrett14]

I didn't know you wrote Looking for Alaska! I read it a few years ago. THE PIECES ARE FINALLY COMING TOGETHER :D

[np1251]

I miss question tuesdays slash Fridays slash John gives advice D:

[ziggypwner]

Bands to cure Beiber fever:

Queen

Aerosmith

Guns&Roses

Van Halen

Beatles

There are more... but I'm to lazy to list them

[RiskyBrothers]

I have an Idea for a book that I've had for almost four years now, but I just realized that it can't be the first book and I would have to write a first (and possibly second) book for the current one, that I have done six versions of, the first 5 were comic books, is this a bad thing, or just me emerging from the suck mode?

[bayace92]

I find that breathing slowly and deeply cures hiccups. I now only hiccup once.

[marissagrace23]

Can't wait until John is giving Henry this kind of advice :) Henry is very lucky to have a dad like John.

[hereverydayadventure]

1:59 Angry John is kinda sexy...

Was that creepy?

Nevermind I don't care.

[saltymessage]

I met a girl in my history class because of her John Green pizza shirt. We've since started many conversations about nerdfighteria, and our mutual excitement for TFiOS. A new friendship has since emerged :)

[randobanana]

First day of highschool, I wore the pizza shirt. SO many people love me for that :)

[StenDarker]

sadly, the goat thing no longer exists :(

[thedarkhands]

I would really like some help on this so ANYONE who can help I thank you because this is a major pickle in my life right now. My school counselor does not like me. He called me selfish when I asked him(I came up with many plans on how to do it)to help me take more classes so I could learn more & has thwarted my attempts to get into classes I need to take. Also he is my DriversEd instructor & the 1st & last lesson he gave me was 3months ago&my test is on 3/2/12 (I need 5 lessons). What do I do?

[SNICKERFACED]

@thedarkhands Calmly ask him why this is, if he can't give a satisfactory answer, lodge a formal complaint with your school. Get your parents involved too. Not entirely sure how that kind of thing works in American schools, but there's bound to be some way of doing that. If he's your freakin COUNSELLOR it's kind of his job to do more than just call you selfish. If there was a reason for refusing to let you take more classes and whatnot, it's his duty to explain those reasons to you. : )

[thedarkhands]

@SNICKERFACED Thanks. I think I'm going to have to lodge a complaint because I've talked with him and get nothing but sexism and rude remarks (and a ton of bs) back...so I have to go to war with the school system again just so I can become a better person and increase my knowledge. I'm glad you don't have to deal with the American school systems. For the most part they are horrible, absolutely horrible. Thank you again.

[SNICKERFACED]

@thedarkhands No problem. Hope you get it sorted out : )

[chidori3sasuke5]

You can cure hiccups instantly with a teaspoon of cane sugar. It works, I've tried it. It's nasty, but if you can handle it, it works.

[RenaeMichelleRachel]

that website seems pretty terrible. fake or whatever

[BIBIisBOREDXD]

This guy realy lkes me, but I don't want to date him because, he's, well not the brightest crayon in the bow and I'm a mega nerd, does it make me a bad person that I don't want to date him because I'm smarter then him.

[nyrarox2008]

"It seems to me that throwing up on another human being is not an act of friendship." Seems like it worked for Pudge. :)

[yourworstnightmar231]

i think she meant that her friend likes her and she doesn't want it to ruin the friendship.

[FlyYellowMoon]

...when I clicked that link, an advert for curing tight foreskin came up. :(

[AlyReality]

The puff is crooked

[qwartkts]

I've seen people wearing the Pizza John Green shirt in downtown Toronto and have told them DFTBA!

[PassTheMarmalade1957]

0:20 JOHN SOCK!

[MrFishes101]

"now, i'm not a physician, i'm just a guy wearing a nice suitcoat, no pants, and a tee shirt with my own face on it..."

[1410yd]

correction, there are in fact boys one would not want to date who are totally okay with smart girls, its actually a circle inside another circle

[Thisismyusername1010]

@1410yd Circleception! :O

[Allyscribit]

@1410yd I was just thinking about that as I watched that part.

[smurphgirl131]

When he started talking about throwing up on people as an act of intimacy, I just started thinking of Lara and the blowjob...

[jikodown]

i went to that website and it was about erectile dysfunction

[QueenMagslieofSweden]

I had to look up "the cut of your jib".

[storyofsarah]

Giant Squid of Anger John is angry. haha

[EtceteraWorkshop]

Puff level: High :P

[poben123]

Every time he says he's not wearing pants I worry.

That means something else entirely in England...

[iamzozexy]

my friend can't over her ex boyfriend. what should we do? Please help us, or I might feel the urge to take her pants off the next time I see her, and she wouldn't particularly enjoy that.

Teehee :)

[grouch314]

Sticking a finger up your backside is meant to be a good cure for hiccups, but i wouldn't recommend trying it in church

[CharmedSlayerr]

Puff levels are high...

[LadyGrendleFrost13]

Another really really good advice you could talk about the "Biber Fever is to tell people DON'T LISTEN TO HIM AT ALL!"..... I don't even see why.....For all those guys who think that girls are too smart for them are better off with their dicks in their socks........HONESTLY what the hell?!?!

[TheTardisNamedSexy]

He doesn't like the cut of his jib. Oh man, I really love John Green.

[alliemarie67]

Giant squid of anger.. :)

[cany230]

Drinking a spoonful of vinegar cures hiccups.  I recommend Balsamic vinegar, as it's really tasty.

[booklover7627]

Brilliance is encapsulated in this man.

[tigertailzlc]

Oh my god that Giant Squid of Anger hahahahahaha

[armstrong088]

College is fun! There are many good people to hang out with and a good place to start a relationship.

EssayTask (@EssayTask) Homework Help, College Essays & Term Papers for Students

[SiennaElderly]

@ducttapeisamazing Mostly the way my friends have become Nerdfighters begins with my casually (but repeatedly) mentioning the cool stuff we've done and the amazing videos the jokes in those videos (etc. etc.) until eventually they want to see those videos for themselves. Then when they watch the videos they realize that we've got a pretty good gig here and they want in on it!

[kaikiyukionna27]

So I go on GraphJam (funny graphs) a lot. One day, I saw a venn diagram that was just a purple circle. The key showed two collors, red and blue. Red was "Boys who don't like smart girls". Blue was "Boys you don't want to date". John's quote was in the middle of the graph, and the title was "Eff Yeah Nerdfighters!!!" I <3 you, Nerfighteria!!

[0candyfloss0]

patience, grasshopper. patience. you know, i always say this to my friends and look at me like im weird or something.

[xLauraxCullenx]

A spoonful of sugar cures hiccups. true story.

[INTPTT]

If your boyfriend says you're too smart, he is unworthy of being your boyfriend. That goes for everyone. It also works with girlfriends and friends.

[RaincloudPlay]

@INTPTT My girlfriend says I'm too smart, he's unworthy of being my boyfriend.

[KiraraLuver]

@RaincloudPlay Lol

She may not be totally serious. My boyfriend is much smarter than me and I frequently get kindof mad/jealous, but in all seriousness I'm proud of how smart he is and I wouldn't have him any other way.

[BingleBanner]

PUFF LEVELS ARE HUGE!

[ReKrisB]

Hiccups: eat apple sauce upside down.

This is what my friend's grandfather told her.

Apparently, it works x3

[SuzanaCommaLee]

French the llama look at those puff levels!

[MrCorkBoard]

I want to march in the Pride Parade with my best friend, but my family is really conservative and disapproves of it, and I don't know how to approach the subject of it, ever... I need advice!

[imaoddballtehe]

so i like this guy and he lives in tennise and has a gf and yeah HELP!!!!!!

[TheQuestion8]

I love how people are still leaving their problems, meanwhile this was uploaded may of 2010.

[guessgirlietv]

his glasses fell off when he got mad.

[thesunsgonewibbly]

Is it cheating if I put the Mountain Goats songs in my Nerdfighter folder?

[JoyRenee1110]

so...does this mean that his advice column would be "Dear John"?

[Rebeccaisstillhere]

My boyfriend who I've been dating for a month keeps telling me that he loves him. It's nice... but I don't feel the same way and I get really uncomfortable when he says it. ANy advice?

[VanillaSnowdrop]

@Rebeccaisstillhere I realize that you're asking John, but if you don't mind the advice of someone who has been in the same position, I'd say that you should talk to him about it. Confront him and tell him your feelings on the subject and if you're still uncomfortable, maybe he isn't the boy for you. Hope everything works out for you. Ta!

[horsesrox2]

as far as hiccupps go dont think of them. consintrate on something else. like suck in a lot of air in your mouth ad try to swallow it, ad keep doing that ( dont stop holdng your breath re use the original air from your lungs) ad do that for about 30 secs and repeat until the hiccus are gne. remember to use A LOT of air like fill your longs and mouth

[VanillaSnowdrop]

What do you do when a friend keeps deciding to stop talking to you/tries to hate you every few months or so, and then berates you for not talking to him when he decides that he wants to be nice again? He always says "If I didn't want to talk to you, I would tell you." I know that he wouldn't. (The reason for his hating me most of the time is because he liked me for the longest time and I didn't reciprocate. Certain things I do that shouldn't offend him do and he blows it way out of proportion).

[dolphin64575]

@VanillaSnowdrop I realize you're asking John, but if this guy shuns you for a while, then is upset at you being upset at him shunning you (if you can understand that), he's probably not the kind of guy you want to hang out with on a regular basis. You need to just sit him down and talk it out, even though it will be really scary and really awkward.

Best Wishes!

[VanillaSnowdrop]

@dolphin64575 But I appreciate the advice all the same, stranger :) The problem is that he's a great friend. He always makes me laugh and he does a lot for me. At the same time, though, he does a lot of stuff that makes me feel slightly uncomfortable. To be fair, he does have a disorder that makes him a little socially incompetent, but even so... I don't want to lose him as a friend, and I don't want to (and can't) change him, but It's mentally taxing to keep going through this year after year.

[thesegirlshaveboobs]

Glorious PUFF!

[TheZocar]

The link doesn't work :(

[Devs0111]

Okay, What do you do when your best friend of six years and boyfriend of three decides to start a fight that ends in the two of you breaking up the night before three of the five final exams you have during your freshman year of college? He wants to be friends, but I'm really upset and idk if i can be his friend because i kinda blame him for all the B's i'm currently getting. Have you ever been in a similar sucktacular situation?

[SonicSaturn]

The mountaingoats doesn't work!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO­OOOOOOOOOOO!!!

[coolcherry1028]

Who are the mountain goats?

[GumiYummi]

My friend Brianna used to be smart until she decided to act dumb to attract guys.

So dumb you might think that she has mental problems. Think I'm lying? She once said: "What's an IQ? It sounds like it hurts!" (Teehee and hair twirling included.)

UGH!

[KiraraLuver]

@GumiYummi ewwwwww

[emilycaroline9]

"The Venn Diagram of boys who don't like smart girls and boys you don't want to date is a CIRCLE."

[cultureddevil97]

she wore at the vmas and performance wuz trill so everyone whos haten do yah job you only making her more famous - Naked Lady Gaga. C0000M - -

[HelloKittyJF]

My ex-boyfriend broke up with me because he always had dated dumb girls, and said he couldn't handle someone smarter than him. That was about 4 months ago, and I still hate him, even through he always tries to be my friend... -.-

[Kemorowolfrain]

@HelloKittyJF and rightfully so that you hate him that is someone who can stand the thought of a witty remark cutting him down please go find a nerdfighter to be in nerdfighter like with

[VanillaSnowdrop]

@Kemorowolfrain And maybe fall in nerdfighter love with

[KiraraLuver]

@HelloKittyJF Don't worry, I'm sure he'll find love one day with a rock or a pickle or something.

[HelloKittyJF]

@KiraraLuver You're so awesome...

[KiraraLuver]

@HelloKittyJF Why thank you. I try not to forget :)

[HelloKittyJF]

@KiraraLuver Well played... :D

DTFBA

[icecreamOWL]

an act of yuck xD

[FredIsMyName22]

"How do I get my best friend out of the Nile?" lols

[ataraxic89]

I cured my own hiccups! :D If you know how to meditate, that usually works. If you dont, LEARN HOW TO MEDITATE!

When you hiccup, just relax, ignore them and clear your mind, concentrate on breathing. After a while you will automatically stop hiccuping after 1-5 hiccups

[BluberryMuffins17]

the sock puppet is argyle.

[ConnerVetro]

I'm graduating College in the spring, and I wasn't able to get into the Graduate program of my choosing, should I wait a year and improve my credentials, or should I go to an okay graduate program i'm not enthusiastic about?

[hollisterseagullJS]

@ConnerVetro Wait a year, it's worth it.

[GrymHood]

Holy Puff Levels, Batman!

[RitsukaAogi]

I'm here... At my OWN performance... Back stage... Watching VlogBrothers... You guys are literally that awesome to me...  Sincerely, Baylin Dé Loach (NerdFighter4Ever)

[KellyisEverywhere]

Can you bring back themountaingoatswillcureyourbi­eberfever?



[maankindj]

and eat jam out of the jar all night!

[fictionrules]

at 1:59 , the giants squids glasses fall off.

[faint52lp]

the website doesn't exist anymore. :(

[SirTeeGeeEss]

*Maths jokes* *maths jokes*

[OneRandomLeo]

the link to the bieber-fever-cure doesn't work any more :(

[indigoplaya23]

Love all your videos b-cuz i love you! And you might ask youself how I can like a stranger well that's because I give out unconditional love into our fragile world! Ttyl vbitchassness!

[supertheaedithman]

"It's kinda an act of... yuck!"

Whoa, your qualities as an author, really shines trough! ;)

[FuzzCutieNerd]

@supertheaedithman And your prowess as a speller is quite vibrant as well. :)

[supertheaedithman]

@FuzzCutieNerd I try. :) English is my second language.

[footothemax]

@supertheaedithman *through

[supertheaedithman]

@footothemax thanks :)

[iliekfriedchicken]

MOUNTAIN GOATS, FTW :D

[TanyaRayne]

@vlogbrothers Do you watch the show QI, hosted by stephen fry and with regular panelist (or as call them, victims)?

There was an answer to curing the hiccups on there.... And p.s. I love the giant squid of anger

[Rarefied100]

"it's more an act of...yuck..."

[Philoishness]

'now, I'm not a physician. I'm just a guy who's wearing a cheap suit jacket, no pants, and my own face on a shirt'

Oh John Green, you brilliant individual.

[animelattack]

The Mountain Goats are audibly delicious. One of their albums John made into like, a companion piece to Paper Towns. I forget which one however. I guess you'll have to listen to all of them : )

[PrettyAsInPoetic]

THE MOUNTAIN GOATS, YES

[TheOtherGirl43]

john. I love your giant squid of anger. :)

[ohheysarahk]

Bring back themountaingoatswillcureyourbi­eberfever! </3

[HBonhamCarterFan24]

John looks like Jim Carrey sometimes..!

[enigma341]

To cure beiber fever i would recommend a heavy dose of extremely catchy rock songs and a six pack of beer, then apply both while spitting out the window and pelvic thrusting at random girls

or you could listen to scatman instead.

[uzumakigurl1995]

does john still do question tuesday?

[ConversesAnonomus]

John, a little advice for you...BRING BACK YOUR ADVICE VIDEOS!!

Fellow nerd fighters loved it and the more advice someone gets from others (especially someone who looks up to the other as almost a mentor) the more knowledge they have, not only about their situation but also about the world in which they live.

[ninaelle2003]

you could also get sick on the last night of sorority rush, worked for me!

ΣΣΣ forever!

[jennaknorr]

The Pizza Shirt thing happened to me! I wasn't wearing one, but I saw someone in public who was and I introduced myself and we had an awesome conversation!