Worst Toilet Paper Ever

[0SumProductions]

everyone knows that you don't let your bitch buy the TP - bitches buy TP that is like sandpaper so it doesn't leave lint on their cunts. Its amateur!

[kidwithcoolroom]

Ouch.....1-ply useless tp.

[Travis25601]

I completely agree about the terrible toilet paper brands! I use generic products all the time to conserve on the budget, and there are cheaper toilet papers that are great, the best so far being White Cloud (Quilted toilet papers are best.) I just HATE having a toilet paper...JUST BECAUSE IT'S CHEAP...because most are too thin and you do end up with a finger up yer ass or it rips before you finish the first stroke of wiping. Expensive Charmin is like a powder leaving lent all over the place.

[PhancyPants99]

LOL!! "going number 2 is uncomfortable enough, why make it more awkward" Thats hilarious!

[CyberPoliceOfficer21]

and..........Subbed

[szeddezs]

he sure loves himself some fine toiletpaper

[EriksenDrul]

Awsome :D haha , this guy is funny.

[dogvom]

Oh for chrissakes, you're 100 per cent wrong about this. It's just ass-wipe. Don't waste a lot of money on something you're just going to cover with shit and flush down the toilet! Get the cheapest possible paper. Your ass won't know the difference.

And, like, could you, like, please, like, stop saying "like", like all the time?

[dbloveskittens]

@dogvom All of Carlos Mencia's fans are idiots who can't spell. This person's comment is yet more proof.

[dogvom]

@dbloveskittens Well, I can't detect any spelling errors in my above post, and since I despise that talentless, plagiarizing twat Mencia, I guess I'm not an idiot either. Other than that, I have no idea what you're getting at. I'm just trying to get you to stop flushing your money down the crapper.

[PureRifkin]

@dogvom "100 per cent" lol

[AgnosticJesus]

@dogvom pretty sure the thinner and less absorbent it is, the more you use, so in reality you are spending just as much money wiping your ass.

[SgtMaj0r]

this video was posted in 2007.. i wonder if he has finished the pack yet

[69Ford429]

I feel the same way when my dad's cheap ass buys the cheap toilet paper. Charmin Ultra is the best! We just got done with the Charmin Ultra and then I go in the bathroom and see theres some cheap ass generic brand thats like a fucking 24-pack! then a few days later I see theres Angel Soft in there. now I gotta do the same thing you did.

[Brennon757]

lol dan you remember me ? brennon from VA ? haha yeah well hey when you wanna come to the coffee house ? i have a guy who runs the coffee house i play at who wants you to come out sometime. lol i showed him this video and he thinks ur fuckin hilarious.

[CDK0818]

its like wiping your ass with a fucking chinchilla! LMAO!

[bassbugg7]

so funny, no Ralphs here. I just moved to this fucked up south carolina, and got tp at the dollar general, and my roomie dude just went through a speel like your vid, about the the shitty rolls of tp I got. He likes the soft thick stuff that sluffs off on your ass after you use it. I hate that stuff, but have to agree that what I bought is about what you describe.

[Kevincat2]

Lol at 0:51 DUH!

[Animatiotron]

only gray toilet paper is good for the environment because it dissolves the fastest and is used from recycled paper.

[JohnRock220]

Unbelievably, I suppose your saps think this is an actual documentary of a guy whining about TP. Of course it's exaggerated to fucking make it hilarious.

[sharjahshake777]

F U dumbass!!

[Freddan0]

Throw them out and use thebetter ones you poor fuck.

[aboyl837]

no one cares about your minor problems, throw it away and get vagina whipes you pussy

[zmike6]

Cottonelle 2-ply quilted with Aloe and Vitamin E. The Cadillac of TP. Worth every penny.

[FayezButts]

you literally weigh 400 pounds

[epicnewsdaily]

excellent! very funny

[ff7redxiii]

I get me costco paper

[1ockedand1oaded]

suck the swine flu out of snaresbrook! (that way you can blow out of both ends!

[thesecretfox1]

its more like self inflicted rape =S,sue sue sue sue sue sue

[javelinconquest]

Haha. Wow.

You know, I'm not really sure why I sat through a discussion of toilet paper, but I think it was because the sheer fluidity of your speech and the verbal awesomeness in which you produce.

[VivaLaBamEpisodes]

LMFAO@ YOU

You rock man!

"Im holding up 3 fingers - I can see that"

LOVE IT!

[debauched2002]

For your edification, the proper term, according to The Profanasaurus, for breaking through and sticking your finger up your butt is "Breaching the Hull". It's a nautical term developed during ww2 when "Bum Wad" issued to the Navy was of a particularly bad quality. I hope this helps. : )

[peachkino]

I hate it when you wipe and the paper is so thin and like card board that you kind of scrape your cheeks...it's like being dragged behind a Vespa with your bare ass on concrete.

[WhoFlungPoop2]

lol

[drivepro]

its like wiping your ass with a cloud.

[BottomBoosh]

Do you Still Have Them ?????

[slashzaku15]

lol my mom buys this crap and it's so annoying

[chunli4me]

keep the vids coming!

[mildouche]

This ho-hum is going nowhere fast

[dbloveskittens]

Don't be so hard on yourself. You might go somewhere someday. Like to a donkey blowjob factory to fill out a job application. Best of luck!

[wombchakra]

So sorry for your apparent lack of intelligence..which is required for an original retort, riposte, or even joke, but especially for whatever you're trying to do...

[Shave0your0taint]

I tried a dollar once...any idea how hard it is to wipe your ass with 4 quarters?

[warmestsunshine]

I was googling "the worst toilet paper". We were having plumbling issues. I happened upon this video. While my husband and I were borderline hysterical laughing at this the toilet unpluuged and all is well in the world. Thanks for the laughs!!! We love it.

[LittleEmoBoy001]

This guy is a racist nationalist piece of shit american. Bill hicks would hate this fucker.

[dbloveskittens]

One, I'm not racist.

Two, the word you were searching for was "jingoist" not "nationalist" which I also am not.

Three, Bill Hicks had a mullet and his dead. So who really gives a fuck what he thinks.

Four, I'm kidding Bill Hicks was great. But he'd probably hate retarded little internet emotards like yourself.

Keep dyeing it black and combing it forward, tiny jeans. Maybe someday it'll coverup how lame and insecure you are. :-)

[haharandom]

This is definitely going in my facebook quotes.

"Keep dyeing it black and combing it forward, tiny jeans. Maybe someday it'll coverup how lame and insecure you are. :-)"

lmao!! love you.

[neo123sos]

@dbloveskittens you are sooo right.

[kakashicrazed]

lol i hear you! i hate those cheap ass toilot paper sheets that R see through...lol XD

[mildouche]

so buy your own, gigolo

[itzahazylife]

u should shave ur asshole lol..i'm italian and used to go thru like a million sheets and clog the toilet. once u shave ur asshole its like 2 swipes and it's all gone lol..it's well worth the awkwardness, trust me

[lumos123]

LMAO!!!!!! HAHAHAHA

[bllooper]

dude stop wheining no 1 caresbout ur toilet paper and ur not even funny

[mildouche]

so whiney..try a corncob...and how about out in the woods and having to use leaves? cityboy

[itzahazylife]

shut up u hick..he's not being serious, he's just making goofy observations about the toilet paper..but don't worry, we're all so impressed that u cleaned ur asshole with a bare corn cob..u should star on a show on CMT..the awesome hillbilly who uses leaves and sticks to clean the shit out of his asshole..i'm sure in ur neck of the woods you'd become a local star..idiot

[mildouche]

another defensive cityboy..ever used soviet toilet paper? it was the shits! whiney boys

itzanolife is a bit obsessive, aren't you, DAN

[itzahazylife]

ur a moron man, seriously..this dude is joking..he's a stand-up comedian..he's just coming up with material. if he's gonna use it on stage or not, i dunno, but nonetheless it was a joke. he's not making a 2:30 min video of him seriously whining about toilet paper..go take ur hick pride somewhere else..we don't like yer kind round here boy!

[itzahazylife]

seriously though, ur coming on videos bragging about using corn cobs to wipe ur ass hahahahaha!!..u sure are a hillbilly man, a professional hillbilly, full of blind pride and moon shine

[ERICMADEME]

I love this vlog! I always watch it when i'm having a bad day and it never fails to cheer me up. Thanks Dan :)

[ShawnaSueShawna]

Send it to me..... that's the kind I use and have all my glourious life. My pet peave it to see hundreds of toilet paper rolls in someones trash can. I like that roll to last weeks!!!! This is a dear subject to my heart. Send me your 1000 sheets per roll!!!!

[flskim906]

lmao youre hilarious man

[contessaoreilly]

I wonder what it would be like to wipe your arse with a Chinchilla?

[fufufuass666]

goddamn fuckin chinchilla!! i love you dan!!!

[TheWarContinues]

I only use the three seashells.

[Chiggs58th]

Dude! I've got that paper beat. When I was a kid growing up here in England we had a type of toilet paper in my school (and throughout all schools in the country I suspect) that was nothing more or less than tracing paper! It was 100% non abosorbent and quite litterally painful to the touch. All it did was smear shit around you ass and make matters worse.

[bkjoelover]

LMAO ahahahaha the next dane cook!

[dbloveskittens]

Please don't wish that on me.

But, thanks for watching my video. I appreciate it.

[bananamonkeyNickala]

omg awesome

[awesomeGA]

WOW lol :)

[miz666]

this had me rolling~ you're so serious...god i love you

amanda

[Aplesause]

Ugh. That cheap toilet paper is what they use in malls.

The good news is that you can embrace the apocalypse with open arms...

[hornygobstopper]

SUPERMAN COULDN'T SEE THROUGH THIS TOILET PAPER! hahahhaaha

[FliPsk8er332145]

lol

"its like wiping your ass with a fucking chinchilla" ahahahaha dude ur fucking funny

[chicagosgirl0727]

lol omg that was the funiest shit ever

[bselande]

he's so outraged, you'd think he was talking about iraq or darfur instead of TP. personally, i use steel wool to help prevent hemhorroids.

[ConfederRickSoldier]

This is the first video that got me hooked.

[Brandino3]

Same Here..

[josephballard1]

OMG dude you bitch about everything! how is nerd HQ?

[YnoPicKle]

hell of alot better than u

[Ssinan421]

dude, the only reason I'm writing this comment is because ur at -6 the least possible, jeez. this guy is awesome, I h8 how dan gets like 300 veiws per vid and how he gets nothing from his comedy, he's so fucking funny

[okchooper07]

"I'll be wiping my ass until the apocalypse with this shit" lol that shit was funny.

[perryxcrunner]

lol great vid!

[veeronikuh]

"im holdin up 3 fingers look" lmao

[homesliceebria]

haaaaaa !!!!!!

[digitdiva]

I'm cryin again..that was hillarious!!! My friend's husband said Scott's toilet paper was like wiping with "tree bark"...reminded me of that haha

[shaunfraser12345]

ur gay with toilet paper dude

[jonin5]

I could fly an airplane no problem. LAWL. You rock! :p

[BBoyKappa21]

LMAO your hilarious

[epodest]

Your so damn hot!

[foxy4786]

this guy has WAYYY too much time on his hands

[ricedeliverydrums]

wow holy shit. the last like 10 seconds was so fuckin funny. hahaha.

[cardnals125]

lol so funny

[caranbo]

You're great, i'm subscribed to u on myspace, thought i'd do the same here...Love it!!!! Ur hilarious!!

[Slothrop91]

haha nice northern owns

[justplayin1006]

hahahahha!!!! id love to see your reaction when the toilet paper is the wrong way on the despencer!

[DarkChibiShadow]

lol

[Smile0789]

lol :D

[dizzaydream]

lmfao haha xD

[itachi1596]

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha­hahahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA­HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA­HAHAHAHAQHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHAAAAAA­AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA­AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA­AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA­AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA­AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA­AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA­AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA­AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA­AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA­AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA­AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA­AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA­AAAAAA^-^

[pak0541]

lmfao. you are the man.

[GrapplerCM]

lmfao!!!!

[manonymus]

Awesome O_o

So... tell us how did you do with your first use...