The Chronicles of Chris-chan: Christian Crashes Into Slumber

[thatstinkyginger]

Everyone says that watching Chris-Chan videos makes them feel better, but not me.  Every day I watch Chris-Chan videos so far, I've gotten friend-zoned, either that or the girl that I've been talking to gets really mad at me and doesn't like me anymore. Making fun of this guy has just made it harder to find a boyfriend-free girl D:

[samurai0rezurii]

How many times has Chris been tricked by the Pickleman? Every time he says that he's been tricked by the Pickleman, again, it makes me giggle. I miss the days of Chris being tricked by the Pickleman.

[TheKing3234]

when will chris realize that his whole life is just one big trolling....

[balrog13571]

Someone should seriously consider making a Pickleman comic. I can see the end of issue #1 right now where Christian's best laid plans are foiled, and as he starts to run away to make a video about it, he makes one last threat (in that voice he used when he said he was willing to strangle Clyde Cash):

"YOU WIN THIS ROUND PICKLEMAN, BUT YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE LAST OF MEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!"

[ReijiRomio]

cake farts

[NyxFTW]

Crashing Into Slumber is the name of my emo band.

[megadisneyfan2]

do you know why no one likes you chris chan? because you are a hypocrite, and you blame all yout problems on your autism and everyone else.

[TheCriton]

I feel pretty bad for this guy... He cant help himself if he has the mentality of a 7 year old.

[PopularityTroll]

@TheCriton Well he can start by not making sexist, homophobic, and racist videos.

[codfanboy5]

did he say captains log lol?

[potatoheadhaoy]

I like how this guy talks like he matters more than he does...Not just this vid, but in virtualy every way. He didn`t understand the fact that trolls feed off of his misery.

[potatoheadhaoy]

@potatoheadhaoy Er...Said Cap`n Obvious.Yeah,yeah, whatever.

[mrfalafl]

:'(

[drogothlord]

Crash into slumber? My god.......He really IS the child of Snorlax!!!

[MuseHijinks]

AND NOW THE VOID IN MY HEART THAT REQUIRES A SWEETHEART IS OPEN

[TheHowks]

'It takes a lot of stress and exhaust to makes a person feel like they're gonna crash and burn'? And here was me worrying about my heroin addiction and the fact that my brother has cancer. Clearly your life is much much harder Chris Chan.

[Goregrinding]

I actually felt sorry for Chris.

True story :s

[smile221]

"The pickle man tricked me again" is such a hilarious statement with that resigned sigh. Being tricked by the pickle man is such a common occurence for him when its an absolute non sequiter in normal speech

[TheHowks]

BWAHAHAHAHA! God almighty Chris, you are one great fat fucking blob of stupid!

[telathys]

"Report him to the police"

I almost felt troll remorse until he said that. Holy fuck, I hate people.

[fighter009]

but you said you would ignore us Ian, why do you lie to us like this Ian, why do you make us hurt so

[Aargh18]

CRAAAAWWLING IIIIIIN MY SKIIIIIIIIN.

[Roflcopter111rofl]

you suck chris chan

[n1njatz]

Played Adagio for Tron in the background, perfect.

[44ch1m]

these vids always sound like there's some spider web conspiracy involving everyone out to get chris chan

[lpgurlnj]

Megan was never your girlfriend, moron. You need a life. Seriously.

[lpgurlnj]

@ThatDisembodiedVoice Hi moron.

[MrsPaul]

I'm listening to my mp3 player, and Offspring comes on: "Why Don't You Get a Job?" Ha ha ha!

[CptnMoosingle]

I have to say, this man is the worst person who has ever lived, and will ever live. He is racist, homophobic, he claims to be a great, model christian but he is guilty of EVERY of the 7 sins, he has an ego bigger than his giant gut, and everything he owns is bought with other peoples money. He is a sulking, whining, bitching, hateful, filthy man and the world would be better off without him.

[retrootakukangaroo]

@CptnMoosingle Chris chan is NOT a man. In fact, I'm not even sure if he's even human.

[Algahiem]

@retrootakukangaroo Maybe he's like Curtis Craig from Pantamagoria 2 were he's just clone from an alien dimension made of snot and rat testicles.

[satinsguard]

@CptnMoosingle His ego can rival Duke Nukem's and Michael Jackson's.

[HarharHagrid]

Such a humble gentleman he once was. May Chris-Chan find his peace.

[lpgurlnj]

@ThatDisembodiedVoice Yeah there are, douchebag. I am all that is woman.

[ALogIsAHuegFaggot]

@lpgurlnj Nigga, you a tranny? Because, y'know, real women don't talk like that.

[lpgurlnj]

@ALogIsAHuegFaggot I have the face of an angel and the mouth of a sailor. Deal with it, faggot.

[lpgurlnj]

@ThatDisembodiedVoice I'm a woman, not a guy.

[lpgurlnj]

@ThatDisembodiedVoice Okay Troll, shut your face or I'll wipe my ass on it!

[HybirdBlue]

watch?v=4dYCJu1is3c

[lpgurlnj]

@ThatDisembodiedVoice No...I am just trying to tell Chris-Chan that Megan wasn't interested in him...nothing's ever going to help that freak of nature except electroshock therapy.

[lpgurlnj]

Megan wasn't your girlfriend, moron! She tried to be your friend and didn't want to go any further!! You're a fucking joke! Go die!

[AxelWedstar411]

This guy should have his own show. I've never laughed so much in my life!

[hobbit4571]

keep pressing 1 and 6 to have a laughing fit

[FoxyMamaRox]

@hobbit4571 LOL XD That's so wrong....but awesome.

[hobbit4571]

this guy has no idea what real stress is

[lpgurlnj]

@hobbit4571 Hell yeah!

[Smashsista16]

Chris wanted Ricky brought to justice for the medallion incident. Instead, he was praised as a hero lol

[TheWordWashington]

keep pressing 6 for a good time

[DrTimeCop]

"i wanna make a sample outta that bastard"

chris confirmed for secret DJ

[TheBlackYousa]

*this video*

*pulls out the world's smallest violin*

[sikokilla1234]

@TheBlackYousa I lol'd, bro. I lol'd.

[TheHowks]

It's times like this when i wish and could throw my fist into the internet and sock this fucker right in his fat retarded face.

[lpgurlnj]

Megan never was, and never will be your girlfriend, Chris-Chan! No woman deserves you because you're trash and you're disgusting!

[NeonLitGhost]

I'M IN MY DARK PLACE

[JefteNintendoNerd]

This is probably what he is doing now.. You know, after Bobby's death.

[IDeafpool]

@JefteNintendoNerd bullshit. chris hated bob for making him do chores. (srsly cwcki it)

[Jack223344]

No, no NO MAN. This girl breaking up with him has made him fall ASLEEP.

TO DEATH, BRO.

[colinwds17]

@Jack223344 saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!?

[Gxyz222]

But, but....what about the deadline for the next "Zappin to the Extreme" issue of "Sonichu"?

[PurpleStorm8]

Oh I will bring that pickle man too justice, I will lure him to a nice, secluded spot and bring him "justice".....I shal start by grabing a hammer and make him...

...A golden throne complete with a priceless jewel crown!!

*Pats hands* Justice served...

[ThatClassicGreyBox]

I would rather watch a kid eat cereal than watch this.

[clonecomanderfox]

The possibility of physical and mental collapse is very real. No sympathy for the trolls keep that in mind. Take the tugboat, buy he ticket...

[brb1006]

Chris Chan looks like a snorlax right here.

[FromBrazilWithLove]

IN MY OPINION THIS IS THE BEST CHRIS CHAN VIDEO....makes me sad when I see his tomgirl ones now. These were the good days



[zulok1337]

@FromBrazilWithLove the trolls really cracked him... they trolled him so hard a nut went lose in his brain

[schnitzal]

You guys are ridiculous. Go to Google and look up his past relationship with the Pickle man.

Pickle man = a beautiful gentleman who saves women being stalked by Chrissy (namely, a poor girl named "Emily," whom was kidnapped and forced to sit with Chrissy and Bob the Lumberjack -because Chris can't go into public without supervision- until said savior made his deliciously dill move.)

[ValkyrieCain123]

is the pickle man a real person who goes around in a pickle costume?

[SNESosT]

what did this pickle man u guys are talking about do?

[ApacheMan2K]

Where did he get the idea of a "pickle man"?

[animator297]

@ApacheMan2K A guy in a pickle costume ruined his date.

[Drac39]

@ApacheMan2K Because he's an insecure closeted homosexual afraid of penises

[ChuWanggAmes]

who here watched the silly dilly comercial after the video?

[BunrakukenIII]

@1234thingy

I thought that was just his hair falling out.

[samurai0rezurii]

He crashed into slumber? WTF? Is he Snorlax?!

[XxPromisesBrokenxX]

@samurai0rezurii Nonono...he is munchlax, snorlax is his mom.

[TheChristisgreat]

why is he laying there like a dumb animal

[eyholmess]

A fucking grown person, tricked by the pickle man.

[444Tazer]

You want to have someone arrested just because they caused you to "crash into slumber"? Man, Chris really doesn't know how insignificant he is.

[ffffuuful]

someone kill him now.

[nucleardeath07]

Jimmy Hill is the true and honest original creator of Sonichu and the electric hedgehog pokemans.

[lukeyboy118]

WASH YOUR FUCKING HAIR

[gymclasshero88]

whats the pickle man?

[DerMorphy]

@gymclasshero88

A guy in a pickle suit, lol. Just search for "pickle suit" on the CWCWiki.

On a side note, for some reason, the phrase "crash into slumber" really makes me laugh. I imagine him standing there and suddenly BAM he falls over and sleeps.

[TheSonicProdigy]

I swear, the mere thought of a man in a pickle costume terrorizing and jacking his life up has me in hysterics!

[zulok1337]

@TheSonicProdigy rofl you have to see the flapjack version it's exactly like we Imagine!

[TheSonicProdigy]

@zulok1337 I already saw it and holy shit, was it spot on! xD They just had to know about Chris beforehand, they just had to! There's no other way they could've come up with something like that on their own! xD

[Drac39]

@TheSonicProdigy The Universe would be perfect if there actually was a pickle man

[1EyeSack1]

whats the real acount of this guy?

[mrhenryleopard]

@1EyeSack1 He removed all his videos and closed it.

Thanks to this account though, we can still enjoy this bra-wearing, cum-guzzling, welfare grabbing high functioning individual doing what he does best.

[JohnJoe18]

@mrhenryleopard what he does best is acting :)

[BigDogJang0]

Yeah everyone, keep ganging up on this guy. Maybe he'll go the way of Cho Seung-Hui.

[roler42]

@BigDogJang0 he's too weak to even carry a gun

[1EyeSack1]

whats his real youtube account?

[reload95]

@1EyeSack1 he quit youtube sadly so i cannot feed myself anymore

[MahBoi22]

Uh oh..he's stressed! Get out the diapers!

[GrawrawrLPs]

That cursed pickleman!

[Devngel]

Blanka from streetfighter? 

[aavallone]

@Devngel Yes, exactly.

[TAXEXEMPTION]

@renanjr123

which one is the chaser?

[Athils]

@TAXEXEMPTION No chaser, just mixed together neat.

[MiHiVidz]

And to this day, all of the people that Chris demanded to be arrested and put in jail are still at large, and are living happy fulfilled lives.

Chris, on the other hand, continues to rot in his outhouse of a home, alone and stupid.

[coneyislanddiscomark]

@MiHiVidz I don't think Chris has it that bad really. I wish I could sit on my ass playing ps3 all day instead of working.

[eyholmess]

@coneyislanddiscomark Not to mention completely impervious to any criticism and self reflection.

[TonyBMan]

and then Chris-chan said: No, I must fight teh demons.

and the radio replied: no chris-chan, you are teh demonz.

and then chris-chan was autistic.

[TonyBMan]

theres not many people i wish to die, but this guy just made the list.......wow, just wow

[Darkone215]

@TonyBMan Its okay dude, he's on many peoples wish to die lists.

[FreakSpazKing]

i just wish that big ass box of 1200 legos falls on him, look at it, it's perfectly placed right above his head

[HillDueceua]

they done smashed that boys heart into 1200 pieces!

[Ball50f5teal]

"the void in my heart that requires a sweetheart is open again and it hurts" seriously i just lost it when he said that

[rawrz255]

LOL POLICE DEPARTMENT?! You really think the police care about your needs to get your tiny dick wet?

[Athils]

I thought he was going to talk about falling in his awful shower and getting knocked out.

[ZyxthePest]

"I'm gonna sulk some more and maybe I'll upload this video..."

LMFAO

Chris, you don't deserve the body you were given. Really.

[Funkybob2]

@ZyxthePest

"Chris, you don't deserve the body you were given."

I disagree. That bloated, pale, weak, small-dicked, balding outer shell of his is a perfect representation of his inner will and spirit; he more than deserves it.

[TonyBMan]

@ZyxthePest who does eserve that fat, disgusting body?

[ZyxthePest]

@TonyBMan Ah, that's my bad. I just meant, he doesn't deserve a body, whatsoever. 

[TonyBMan]

@ZyxthePest lol. i think i may have written that drunk...

[NeoSquadillah]

get a pokeflute to wake him up!

[ultimatewarrior597]

so he is emo as well? haha no wonder he has no fans

[dakarus]

@ultimatewarrior597 hello....this is 2008 chris

[ultimatewarrior597]

so hes emo as well?

[DerMorphy]

"Crash into slumber"? How does that look, he just stands there and suddenly, boom, falls over and sleeps?

[videogamenostalgia]

I think Chris uses the word 'stress' to mean depression. He always tries to quit phone conversations when people come up with genuine problems with Chris' life that he can't make excuses for by saying he feels stressed. I think deep down, Chris realises that his life is completely empty and meaningless, and he's a slob who has never worked hard at anything worthwhile. He WANTS responsibilities of a family and a job, he's just too lazy to go out and get it. He wants the rewards without the work.

[entropy44]

LOL @ 2:03 "buh bye bay nose" he said it again!

[shadowluma]

"The Pickleman."

He keeps blaming it on someone.

[MrDonkeydong155]

Chris Chan broke up with a Street Fighter character? I can see why, Chris was too low for Blanka's standards.

[XXXSnakemandaaquiXXX]

@MrDonkeydong155 yeah they they lost  the " spark " XD XD.OMG my joke sucks ass XD

[MistressRebekah]

Chris's perception of the legal system: someone does something you don't like, they can go to jail for it. period.

[videogamenostalgia]

@MistressRebekah Careful- if Chris read your comment, you could go to prison!

[SHlNOBl3]

Blanka? What next, a guy pretending to be a girl named Dhalsim calls him and wants to be his girlfriend?

[FFS1NICO]

@SHlNOBl3 not black.

[areeb10000]

@SHlNOBl3

You're giving everybody ideas ...

keep going :D

[captainghey]

@SHlNOBl3

"M BISON IS REAL!"

[AzureClarity]

Excuse me while I go crash into slumber, having nightmares of cocktails consisting of Fanta and semen and having a creepy manboy stare into my very soul.

[TheDisturbedOne752]

"I'm sad." EMOTION EMULATION COMPLETE.

[videogamenostalgia]

This is my favourite Chris-Chan video!

[renanjr123]

Don't worry tubby, some Fanta and Cum will cheer ya right up! =D

[asukafan133]

@renanjr123 damn and i'm drinking fanta i think i'm gonna pour it out now

[MrSparklehooves]

@renanjr123 eew XD

[Kamikitsune0]

this was the first video I ever saw of chris-chan...(I've pretty much seen and heard it all by now...) but picture this as I saw it... "Well, it's done. Blanka broke up with me.... cuz the pickleman tricked me again..." At first I thought this was some kind of comedy clip that wasn't all that funny...but I have sense then learned the Truth..lol But still to this day I haven't seen WHAT photos she saw that made her do so....anyone know which ones they were?

[Sabohaque]

@Kamikitsune0 Blanka isn't real. None of this is real. The world is an illusion of mind, nothing more.

[Getoffmearse]

I don't feel bad 4 him cause he was stupid enough to post this creepy shit up on the internet

[analblazer666]

Well then Chris, go to sleep and stop making videos for a minute. Gosh!!!! You know you didn't crash, if your making videos about crashing into slumber!!!!

[XuBlax]

i would hate to crash and burn into a whole bunch of slumber...

[tw1stedgrudge]

"I hope you jerks and trolls who wanted to break us up, are happy, 'cos all you did, is make me -"

LOL YES!!!!

[Kamikitsune0]

why does he believe that anyone can be sent to jail (which by the way is for people that get less than a year...prison hold people for longer...) just because he says they need to go to jail?? Of what I've heard about this guy HE needs to be the one in prison... being a creeper pedo-fork with a 13 year old boy...stalking girls that don't want him, making unwanted sexual advances on women, being racist, verbally threatening to kill and beat people up,& drawing random porn...

[maggallo]

o shnap not the freekin pickle man! man...

[mrGrandpaCharlie1]

I am hooray i'm going too go play hexbox now

[Carnage1235]

Hahhahha, I fucking love this line:

" And you know, it takes a lot of stress and exhaust… and such… to make a person feel like they're gonna crash and burn… into a whole bunch of s-- into a long slumber…"

The way he says it is so muddled up and incorrect. Funny, funny shit.

[ClementRedneck]

I think Chris is a pretty cool guy. He crashes into slumber and doesn't afraid of anything.

[Kelthire]

@ClementRedneck I think CWCville is a pretty cool guy, eh drinks own semen and doesnt afraid of getting trolled

[videogamenostalgia]

@Kelthire well done for actually getting the meme right!

[DonZabu]

@ClementRedneck

It's "eh", not "he".

[GamesGear]

I just figured, Your a dumbass,you live under a rock,and when you get pissed off it's really weird O_O... YOUR PATRICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

[Kelthire]

@GamesGear Nah, comparing Chris and Patrick is like comparing a piece of shit and Einstein

[mrslash11]

I mean, is "slumber" different from what he usually does? He doesn't really do anything

[kuhlraum]

"The man in the pickle suit tricked me again..." I wanted to make a joke about that line, but I can't beat it.

[Ragedhard]

THE HUNT FOR RICKY IN KENTUCKY OR ILLINOIS IS ON

SPARE NO ONE

[appleman1324]

.....due to stress, chris cannot finish issue 12 sonichu comics.....

sitting his on ass using the computer 24/7 living in messy confined piece of shit home, and getting welfare checks..... very stressful

[SuperBigChug]

SUPER BIG CHUG FOR PRESIDENT OF CWCVILLE

VOTE ON SOMEONE YOU CANT TRUST!

[nickblaze420]

imagine someone who doesnt know the whole story with this retard hear "sigh.... the pickle man tricked me again....sigh."

[mhirtes12]

"Bring him to justice. Turn him into the police department. I want to make an example out of that bastard."

For what, Chris? There's no law against cockblocking a fat smelly pedofork like you. In fact, I think a few states actually offer trolls a tickertape parade for doing that.

[mhirtes12]

"WANT WOMAN!"

[vaguelyhumanoid]

"You made me crash into slumber!"

"Illinois or Kentucky, but I think it was Kentucky"...

a tragicomedy to last the ages.

[gabba1gabba1hey]

anyone know a guy named ricky in Kentucky? We need to find him!

[SlashFirestorm]

@gabba1gabba1hey

WANTED DEAD OR ALIVE:

SOME GUY NAMED RICKY

Location: KENTUCKY. OR ILLINOIS. PROBABLY KENTUCKY.

Physical Appearance: ????

REWARD: ONE FREE SONICHU DRAWING

[GentlemanOrcus1]

"And you made me crash... into slumber..."

Truly, Chris the Poetic is deep.

[ColorzBox]

IF I FUCKING SEE THAT PICKLE MAN ONE MORE TIME.....

[otakukangaroo]

Hey Chris, want some fries with your whaaburger?

[GIJOEY777]

I love how he asks the viewers to turn someone into the police. "They hurt my feelings, so they should go to jail."

[Carnage1235]

Wasn't Blanca 3 fucking MALE trolls? Why is he saying "she's" sad?

@Carnage1235ï»