Tom Wilson - "Haiku Songs" (Stand-up Comedy)

[cdhstarz]

I wanna be rich, but I hear lottery winners are sometimes sad

[DJSexLeopard]

I don't get it. I just don't get it. Why was he only in a few movies. And some low budget stuff. He has way more talent than 90 percent of the trash that's on tv today. I don't get why he doesn't have his own comedy show. I mean he is so underated and he is so funny and he has so much talent. That sucks I wished he could showcase more of his talent...

[tebocardoso]

LOL, good stuff.

[whackamolechamp]

Happy Thanksgiving!

Laughter is beneficial

Feed your dog a Grape

[HappyGestapo]

I just discovered this was on Netflix. I. HAVE. HAPPY!

[angelgirls1980]

LOL.. loved it. : )

[justmusicandme]

My favorite haiku: Windows Zen error message:

Yesterday it worked.

Today it is not working.

Windows is like that.

[justmusicandme]

Fun for a Saturday. Or a Sunday. Some people are so clever!.

[carrothree]

Browsing on Youtube

Thank God today is Friday

Why am I still home?

[NanoWBO]

I just heard him on my local radio station!

[AssDroidz]

@NanoWBO HELIUM

[4yan4]

Haikus are easy.

But sometimes they dont make sense.

Refrigerator.

[gorogawa]

@4yan4 LOL! 

[MsGirgirl]

@4yan4 ok i also want a t-shirt with that on it.

[getsomelead]

75,000 view cool!

[evetteogden]

I love this! You are genius. :-)

[ArcadeGames]

LOL

[Acetopy2]

Walking on a beach

I suddenly see a chair

Where has my pie gone?

[BlackStallionWoman]

Tom made fun of Barney the Dinosaur's I love you song.

[JBHBproductions]

chords?

[TheBrotherBo]

My Uncle is in

The land of the dead for good

We are happy now

(c) 1966

[bareakon]

A haiku about stereotypes:

I'm an englishman

Would you like a spot of tea?

Pip pip, tally-ho!

[jarvisemerald]

I love comedy skits done with guitars...and popular songs. Usually better than the originals. but got to give credit to the originals, or we wouldn`t have them to listen Love. even better when a artist uses their own lyrics like this guy. i actually do comedy skits too with guitar on my channel :) keep it up! giving me ideas.

[ifreakovern64]

Haikus are easy

But sometimes they don't make sense

Refrigerator 

[rorrt]

i wished someone told my dog that grapes were poisonous, he bloody loved eating them, infact one christmas he ate about 85% of the largest christmas cake ive ever seen (with currants, sultanas and raisins), didnt do anything...

mind you he isnt alive anymore. Musta been the fruit and nut chocolate bar.

only joking, he died from internal bleeding, due to a burst aorta........

Very funny songs/haikus all the same.

[hfbakery]

Grapes are poisonous to dogs

[uogtriton]

hahaha...

Well I wrote for you

This song in Haiku because

I don't have much time

[monkeemee]

I liked this vid just for the one haiku about dogs not eating grapes loooool

[mferrusca]

Why is no one commenting on his guitar skills? He's GOOD! WHOA!

[HisForeverr]

:O 18 syllables! "wind-whips-west-a-cross-the-f­low-ers-in-the-des-sert-where'­d-i-put-my-lip-balm?" Shaaammmee Tom :P ♥

[HisForeverr]

You know the one that made me cry with laughter? " It's strange that a dog will eat a dead bird, but will never eat a grape. ♪ " and "Life rushes on, fast and faster, but the fact is you can't rush toast. ♪ "

You're a brilliant man Tom :) ♥

[gingergeri]

Thanks for the good laughs! It really brightened my day.

[ginag65]

Now that's funny!!

[Sch0nk]

I still laugh everytime I hear this song.

[liamofc]

Excellent again tom!

You never fail to impress :)

[live2laph]

i live in Haiku Hawaii

[wisekingy]

omg toast that cracked me up this is hilarious

[BJThomas21]

Our dogs eat Grapes but then again they are stupid!

[SuperJaykay93]

@BJThomas21 My cat eats Dominoes pizza

beat that lol

[BobdeBilde]

Danny Bonaduce probably wouldn't make a good babysitter has 18 syllables.

[SweetSoccerMoves]

@BobdeBilde Hey used probably as one syllable.

[sxephlI]

@BobdeBilde 17

[DreamPen]

@BobdeBilde I think he pronounced it as "prob'bly" (omitted "a"). Still funny anyway.

[thechocobro]

"Life travels on faster and faster,

But the fact is, you can't rush toast."

Gold.

[IbanetoElGlande]

OK, I got that last one.

"Fred Flintstone ordered ribs every week

He had to know they tip his car"

Well, I suppose that's like 2nd or 3rd marriage.

Simply a mystery..

[IbanetoElGlande]

Thanks Tom you're brilliant. Anyone could write the last one for me? please. I don't speak english perfectly and don't unsderstand that one. Thank you very much. Cheers from Spain.

[SoulToaster]

The shakesspear song is about antibiotics =)

[Choo69]

still don't get it...

[Choo69]

only one i didnt get is shakespeare

[chrisis138]

Have you been doing this for awhile or were you inspired to do this comedy?

[rizikuoti]

it doesn't work in lines when you sing a hiku :P

[TheVampireEd]

5+7+5=17

[themunster]

He's right, you can not rush toast.

[zucchini4067]

"Its strange that a dog

will eat a dead bird

but will never eat a grape"

seventeen syllables of wonder!

[knoxvilleguy2]

This is MUCH better than much of the sour owl - poop that passes for " comedy " lately.

GREAT !!!!

[evilcam]

This was perfectly random. Spectacular job. I could also watch this sort of thing all damn day.

[refundgame]

Love these.

[lioneyejr]

heeeeey......you were on Reba! =D Greetings from Croatia!

[AndrewSigwart]

This is great!

[Konata101]

Oh my gosh, this is hilarous! YOU MUST MAKE MORE!

[AbeiLLe123]

"the fact is you can0t rush a toast."

haha :) great! :) loved it!

[annelidworm]

I could listen to these for hours. Genius.

[rayman11687]

i couldn't stop laughing. my co workers were looking at me like i was crazy.

[daz1200]

ah man he is good lol

[Jedilink109]

This collection of songs is pretty fantastic. :P

[LittleRae]

I <3 you, that's all I have to say about that.

[KateLouise]

Haikus are easy

But they don't always make sense

refridgerator

don't know who wrote that one but its my fave :)

[everestfalls]

LOL

[hookhoax]

LMAO. I want hear more of the "Danny Bonaduce" song!!

[SoulToaster]

Where did i put my lip balm...

ROFL epic video... great work mr. wilson xD

[Pfeffburger]

fantastic :D

[BuddinTheAmazing]

Not only is it funny, but the thing he plays at the start is really good in itself! I want to learn it...

[MysticUnidonkey]

funny :)

[bigneil8888]

funny guy

[Foo2Coo4Schoo]

"Life rushes on, faster and faster, but the fact is you can't rush toast."

Dude!! I want that on a T-shirt! XD

[JimiTuber]

Sure, you can't rush good toast but occasionally, good toast is a rush. (I think I got 17 there. Yep)

[makenna88]

Gosh, I'd like... any of these on a t-shirt. What a great idea.

[bigdaddy2106]

@Foo2Coo4Schoo Yep, that's my next Facebook status!

[oneforsafety]

Funny stuff. Keep it up, Tom.

[yodabejedi]

wow! holy shinobi! subscribe me do! Really funny dude. An hour ago you were that guy in that trilogy I'm not mentioning. Now your a really funny guy that I'll spread the word about and show my friends. awesome. Great tone in your voice too.

[ajbAsCanBe]

This was so funny I actually snorted!

[bilstew]

A man with guitar

Perhaps sage or maybe fool?

He knows HAIKU rule.

[Bondomusic]

Nice -)

[ghengisjon]

Very nice!

[de7con]

Seventeen syllables of wonder budy!

Keep it going budy.

[reflectedsky]

Love your songs, Mr. Wilson! Keep up the fantastic work! :-)

[tmtrcclby]

That was amazing. Very witty.

[upinflamezzz]

Funny Stuff!

[HauntedGhostLady]

At least he doesn't have to worry about iambic pentameter.

Never saw him on Comedy Central though. I found out he was a comedian through Wikipedia.

[Raptorman117]

Lol! I was about to look Haiku up on Wikipedia, and then you told the audience member to do the same thing! Freaky how that happens.

[sagivstern1]

0:50 best sani press the time thing.....

[mokshaingive]

Awesome!

[JermLeather]

Holy Poop, Tom!! These haiku songs are hilarious!!!!

[blonderoach5104]

Good thing your dog won't eat a grape because it could kill him.

[MysticUnidonkey]

I never knew grapes could harm dogs until now. Years ago I dropped one and my dog was gonna eat it, but he just spit it out, didn't even bother chewing. Luckily. I laughed at the part because I thought that's what he meant. Weird.

[BigMarsh]

You can't rush toast!

[edwardrobo1]

made me laugh hard, love the"where d i put my lip balm" bit.awesome on the guitar

[024yeknom]

my throat hurts cause Im laughing so hard

[CanadianNinjaMonkey]

This made me laugh more than I have in a long time, thank for that :o)

And I agree, Danny Bonaduce would not make a good babysitter. Now I want to test the grape theory.

[IsaSkyLimit]

lol! this is awesome, and by the way awesome guitar!

[Jaydaddyfresh]

effing love this! Awesome stuff tom, pure awesome!

[Johnathan136]

Where can i get the tab to that very first song?

[Usubstitution]

I must be a dork for counting them

[HoshiHikari]

Haha!!!!! It reminds me of Relient K's "Crayons Can Melt on Us for All I Care"

[TGAHFAN]

Oh you think I'm done? LOL.. You are awesome!

[ChristyABell]

0:54

can't get enough ahhahah

[gonesouthin]

can someone get me some tabs or chords for this?

[majestia19]

That was great. Plans are in the works to come see you in Omaha...

[Holdenon3]

The songs are great and funny and all, but they're not really haiku.

Haiku isn't just 17 syllables. It's split into lines of 5-7-5. Ideally, it should have rhythm and rhyme because, well, it's a poem.

Line one establishes the premise, line two adds a further premise and line three draws wise or funny conclusion.

For example, here's a haiku I wrote a few years ago called...

KISS

Paul and Gene in charge.

Ace and Peter hit the road.

Crowds were not as large.

[TomWilsonUSA]

Thanks. Wait, let me get a pen.

[8300dvo]

lmao, oh you

[DuckwalkSupreme]

@Holdenon3 You do not correct Tom Wilson, butthead. Haiku doesn't have to be rhymed. In fact, multiple websites say that it is, in fact, an unrhymed verse style.

[s0ccer10ver]

@Holdenon3 dude... dont judge the lyrics? it doesn't mater if it is or not? NO ONE CARES!!

[anobar]

@Holdenon3.............LOOK AT ME!!! I've never touched a female!.....wait, I mean...."My days are lonley. Tears I do shed all the time. At least I have lube.".......lol

[JCMcGee]

@Holdenon3 : Yeah...but you should have a season word, a splitting word and a picture to go with it....and it should be written in Japanese.

So, Relax buddy,

Just enjoy the guys wee songs.

No sense of humour?

[MsRlpanda]

@Holdenon3 - it's called artistic license, deal with it!

[tmitch1109]

@Holdenon3 since when do poems HAVE to rhyme...

[JoeDeceiver]

@Holdenon3 These rules are why I refer to Haiku as the 'Garfield' of poetry.

[nrevelations777]

@Holdenon3

Haikus need not rhyme, in fact, it's discouraged.

[024yeknom]

jerry lewis wore new socks every show, but I've worn these socks before.

Its strange that a dog will eat a dead bird, but will never eat a grape.

Danny Bonaduce probly wouldnt make a great babysitter

[DentonUSA]

Amazing. This was absolutely hilarious.

[thejackster]

That's great stuff Tom. The Danny Bonaduce one is the best.

[enotdetcelfer]

MAHAHA.. OH MAN.. I'm freaking crying this is great

[KwaksSerenity]

lol, awesome, absolutely!

[StevenPenrodJr1979]

yup, all 17 words long :)

[CloseToYouM]

Hooray you did it! ; D

[Shane028]

What a legend!!! He is soooo funny.......

[phiberosmosis]

Good stuff Tom

[TripleThreatUS]

NICE!

[crapfilmjunky]

Absolutely brilliant as ever!!! Big fan.

[dreemernj]

Hilarious as always man! Thanks for posting it

[andy2cool]

haha :)

[hadmiralhackbar]

ROFL.

[L0zz0]

lol awesome

[Joliie]

haha, very funny sir :)

Now slap me and call me budhead :-D (sorry could not resist.)

[CloseToYouM]

If you want, add "Haiku" and "guitar" in ur tags. You will get even more views.

All the best hon. :)

[CloseToYouM]

HAHA I really got EVERYTHING here! I laughed so hard! Awesome job Tom. REALLY I'm a big fan!

[amankins]

i swear  i love this guy

[mgabbard]

LMAO!  Tom rules!

[maurer3d]

Great video!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Kingsnake1]

cool guitar.

[jansevskis]

i lived in haiku in hawaii, maui

[blath]

Oh man, that's friggan awesome. When's the new album coming out?

[poisonstinger]

Alway great to see you're videos. I don't know if you even read your comments but, I just thought I'd say I enjoy watching them.

[itsmrGuy]

FINALLY a new video!

[CasedLogic]

I think the world is ready for the "Haiku Music" Generation

[infovideo]

GO BIFF!!!

[burttscornerbenny]

Very funny Stuff!

[Addi88]

When I saw you had a new video, I instantly said "yes" and smiled like a goofy SOB.

Stellar stuff, Tom.

:D

[Voyagersguidebook]

These are too funny. Thanks for sharing your great music and talent with us. :)

[barakiji]

awesome!

[ZacPensol]

Hahah "but he didn't have antibiotics", great stuff!

[mu301nh]

very funny

[obie666]

Tom is back! Yeah!

[Illuminatta]

More, please! :)