... CHUCK NORRIS!

[MEGATRYANT]

one day they sold chuck norris pee in a can

Red Bull was born

[jbaron43]

This comment was removed by Chuck Norris

[elsantoloque1]

Chuck Norris is just a man. If he is like a god he would appear and hit my head with the keyboasbfhjsagfisahlfgsahfagvg­hcghgbtxdtyjdtyjsgsao

[UlyssestheFox]

Chuck Norris is a right winger that hates gays and wants prayer in school.

Also, he's a bad actor.

Whoops, I ruined everything.

[hunter71002]

Hfhjf

[emoXmoobi]

If chuck Norris is SOOOOOOOO amazing then why: 1. Did he get beat up by Bruce Lee? 2. Is he just in infomercials? 3. Is he going to die someday? 4. Doesn't he just kill me now??

[LAcHlAn1011]

Riding a shark just as big as JAWS

[TheSweetKnight]

I like the way he says Chuck Norris

[NewlyBoughtSpatula]

Evolution is slow. Chuck Norris sped things up.

[bunnyboy123100]

100 views a day

[TheJustas18]

88 peapople ar dead now

[mercinary909]

1.go to google

2.type xx:chuck norris

3.press im fealing lucky(not serch)

4.read ALL of the words on the page

5.come back to this page and give me thumbs up so all may see the glory of google and chuck norris COMBIND.

(sorry for spelling problems if you find them)

[milanche226010]

i chucknorized dis video..

[StubblyVlog]

Jesus walked on water, Chuck Norris swims through land

[jajidejumbo]

why does everybody think of chuck norris like he was a god. if he was as awesome as everybody said, he would come to my home and beat my head on the keyboardvdggdghhfghjasfhjmghfz­ftujfzhngzufgjgzkhjghjtfzjkght­tjtze

[R33C399]

@jajidejumbo nice 1 lol

[flickLowks310]

chuck norris for president

[HurrahKingOle]

(Comment removed by Chuck Norris)

[shteeeeeven12345]

Chuck Norris ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.

[952412apiz]

fcuk off!

[rofljelly135]

ACHUNKOFYOURASS!

[sadlobster1]

People will probably be screaming this phrase in their heads, once The Expendables 2 premieres next summer

[CptMyname]

Chuck Norris died 3 years ago.

Death was just to scared to come for him.

[XxNOBLE02xX]

chuck is super dump that he will never come to my house and bang my head on my keyboard grutheyfrhgerfgerghrghrghreuhg­reghrhggrrehgrthryruyhrgureuge­ruirtuyrtyurtrtuytyytyyyyyyyyu­rtyqryturtqttehfeufhr

[GDevourer]

I'm so afraid for the fate of these 79 ppl

[TheBartcristian]

79 personas que moriran a manos de Norris :yaoming:

[SibeirianWolf32]

Ha bite this

[Dragonzord571]

@bluemime86 How have the jokes went too far, they are complementing him and saying that he is god. which is true

[Sac077]

Chuck Norris pours napalm on his cereal, chocolate chocolate milk isn't hardcore enough

[BlySS93]

75 people are dead men.

[mads5376]

Achuckkhanoreaahs

[redLuigi11]

chuck norris can level a city just by saying his name

[NeSmetam]

Chuck Norris, Jesus and Steven Seagal once tryed to walk on water, first went Chuck and did it, then Jesus did it but Steven Seagal failed ... he re-tried and failed again ... after the 3rd failed attempt Jesus said to Chuck "should we tell him about the hidden rock?" Chuck replied "what rocks?"

[JabberjawGaming]

Jesus walked over water, chuck norris walked over jesus.

[rsjuulrs]

69 dislikes... FUCK yeah

[janism94]

Feel sorry for the people that pressed Dislike. RIP.

[taztaz12345671]

chuck norris suckodplkfevmgkenafjklsnddddew­şvjsgkblnskvlnjklsdnvjsklvnAaa­aaaaahnfuıorgdnvjkncjefklgbvhj­gvlbgjh

[trinious2511]

@taztaz12345671 stop copying ppl from 9gag. fag

[taztaz12345671]

@trinious2511 :D a true 9 gagger, wıll reveal himself. :D

[errazurich]

57 people die today ... nobody knows why

[MrXGLWalker]

A CHUNK OF MY ASS!!!!!!

[Euradys80]

Chuck Norris is a ginger, therefore he has no soul. And on top of that he sucks at karate.

[thaliagrace90139]

@Euradys80 I smell a troll. And he smells like dog shit.

[coolbionicle]

@thaliagrace90139 Don't bother, the kid's already dead.

[Bioniclefan45]

@Euradys80 No, Chuck Norris is a great Karate.

[Dragonzord571]

@Euradys80 Chuck Norris sees all, knows all and can slam a revolving door. Br sure to check in your closet and under your bed.

[iLuminateFan]

Chuck Norris once won American Idol, using only sign language

[LegoKing345]

Chuck Norris once did something that no other human can do

[mrpsycho414]

Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.

[thecyperhornet]

Those are the words people hear when they are born

[SoliloquyOfChaos]

Fuck Chuck Norris.

[3000jack]

@SoliloquyOfChaos :O HOW DARE YOU!!!!!!

[newyy1]

If World War 3 were to start tomorrow, all nations would lose and Chuck Norris would be declared the winner!

[SLiMJiM901]

they once made a chuck norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody

[TheMarvelousDC]

If Chuck Norris doesn't want the Earth to be destroyed in 2012, it won't happen.

[ZuttoAragi]

@TheMarvelousDC But what if he does, after all, even if the universe exploded and the space-time continuum melted into a seething pool retardation and "yo momma" jokes, Chuck Norris would still be perfectly fine in his Fortress of Bearditude drinking awesome shakes.

[TheMarvelousDC]

If Chuck Norris doesn't want the Earth to be destroyed in 2012, it won't happen.

[oldblubblub]

God didn't make Noah's Flood. Chuck Norris just did a cannonball.

[ShadowACS]

Chuck Norris did not approve ShadowACS's comment, so he took apart the internet, removed said comment, and rebuilt the internet with this message instead.

[michelle941000]

I thought I seen a UFO, but it was just Chuck Norris throwing me his frizbee.

[Bortfangirl]

'' A CHUCKA NORRIIIIIIIS...''

'' Riding a shark just as big as Jawwwwwssss!!''

[Snipertoaster]

A man did Parkour over the millennium stadium today? That's impossible! Unless of course that man was... *cue video*

[Shino302]

answer to who's been confirmed for The Expendables 2

[sadlobster1]

I think this will be ringing through a lot of peoples heads, once The Expendables 2 comes out. For those who don't understand what I mean; Norris will be in the movie along with Schwarzenegger, Van Damme and Willis.

Them plus the original cast will make the sequel so many levels of awesome

[AWAChamp619]

@sadlobster1 There should be a Van Damme vs Chuck Norris fight in that. Maybe get to see Chuck Norris as a villian would be cool.

[00711282]

i do not like chuck norris.... sorry my phone is ringing!

[OmniTerror]

The Critic should reviwe Chuck Norris Cartoon series

[wildthing302]

@OmniTerror whait thre a chuck norris cartoon series? 0_0

[OmniTerror]

@wildthing302 Yes it call Chuck Norris Karate Commando only had a few epsiodes

[OmniTerror]

The Critic should reviwe Chuck Norris Cartoon series

[Mr0life]

I want this as my SMS ringtone!!! :s

[THELASTREDMAGE]

yes chuck is cool but the jokes gone too far.

i dont hate him i just hate the lame joke.

[THELASTREDMAGE]

bruce lee is better problem YOUTUBE

[MrMPS2002]

Did you know that how kids check under their bed for monsters, monsters check under the bed for Chuck Norris?

[ekayudha86]

the mark 10 on iron man is chuck norris

[wildthing302]

chuck norris can drink fire and eat water

[BJ64Th3M0v13f4n]

Guy: Wow I kicked so much ass yesterday!

Guy2: You know who else kicks ass?

Nostalgia Critic: CHUCK NORRIS!!!!!!! (MUSIC)

This is one video i can keep watching and i can never get tired out, NEVER!!!!!!!!!

TRUE FACT: Bruce Lee is actually Chuck Norris' teacher.

[SlayyerDragon]

Chuck Norris was a faggot bitch... and still is.

[Jacob3221366]

This is stupid and so is chuck norris-ding dong (door bell) me:hello? (open the door) chuck norris standing there...........shit

[timlexy]

Chuck norris once got pulled over for speeding, chuck let the cop off with a warning

[Murnau22]

Putting Chuck Norris in The Expendables 2 will surely make people's heads explode just by the mere mention of his presence. In fact, the first movie was a bio pic of Chuck Norris, however, they had to split up his personality into many men since no one can embody FULL Chuck Norris...

[OffandOn13]

When Chuck Norris kills someone in a computer game, that particular file is erased, i.e. they ACTUALLY DIE!!!

[HanaYooHoo6]

"I'm chuckin' your aassssssss"

[OffandOn13]

How Chuck Norris killed Bin Ladin? The Seals simply brought a photo of Chuck and showed it to him.

[ReconSparton]

Chuck Norris said "Yes" to a No-Man

[OffandOn13]

Chuck Norris never has a bad day, they're afraid of him.

The moon is a former part of earth. The part where Chuck Norris has his swimming pool.

[bosshog7169]

Kids, just say no to Chuck Norris. If you ignore him maybe he will go away.

[PresidentDRCI]

Chuck Norris was once bitten by a black mamba. after days of pain and agony, the snake finally dies.

[kyubiiofrage]

Pfft, Chuck Norris is old hat? You know who REALLY kicks ass?

A-NEVILLE LONGBOTTOMMMMM!!!!

[NoMorePopMusic]

@kyubiiofrage to be fair he does a good job in the last movie

[jaguar4u2012]

When there is a Forest Fire Chuck Norris Comes with Flamethrower and Starts to Burn the Fire

and THE FIRE BURNS ALIVE!!!

[MajorSnadwich]

45 people received an AirKick by Chuck Norris

[LMpsycho]

ONE M0:00RE TIME =D

[ToaMahriNika]

It took me a little while to decipher the fast-sung lyrics to this, but I got it now.

That was wierd.

[mikethemikeful]

hey. guess what? *plays video*

[0prosthetics0]

I will never get tired of this. Ever.

[TheJboy88]

I've never watched any of chuck Norris' movies before.

Is he a good actor?

[ZacksQuest]

@TheJboy88 He is, just to add on to his awesomeness.

[kennedy072]

my ghost at my back died when he saw his picture

[Broezzz]

Take the bible, replace the words 'God' and 'Jesus' and you've got Chuck norris' life story. (yes, Chuck is his own son)

[camsaltar]

@legoclockfreak710 and he was never heard from again... R.I.P legoclockfreak70

[legoclockfreak710]

@camsaltar im back!

[camsaltar]

@legoclockfreak710 DOES NOT COMPUTE (spontaneously explodes)

[HatersHater1000]

hahaha good shit

[garyjiujiu]

@legoclockfreak710 I dont think people care if theres someone at your door

[legoclockfreak710]

@garyjiujiu try telling that to the 254... 255... 256... and counting.... thumbs up!!!

[Dxthegod]

Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.

Fact #38 in my Great Big Book of Chuck Norris Facts! :D

[bh5496]

this scene is funny EVERY TIME!

[eyal17eyal]

wtf



[apatano20]

Chuck nortis once shot down a german fighter plane by holding out his finger and saying bang

[HydroMonsoon]

Ozzy Ozzbourne once bit the head off of a bat. Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris bit the head off of Batman.

[Globofglob]

Chuck Norris can convince Charlie Sheen that he's losing

[TheLuvers666]

I KILLED CHUCK NORRIS!

[rahkshi0k]

Chuck Norris invented rap music when his heart started beating.....

[DarkwingDork]

Google doesn't allow people searches for Chuck Norris because the website knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.

[Jago433]

Chuck Norris can kick a girl in the balls

[therunningman09]

kids check their closet for the boogie man, the boogie checks his closet for chuck norris

[EmpireMate]

If you spell chuk noris wrong you d..

[cain2217]

CHUCK NORRIS can text on a pay phone.

[trungvuongk2]

A CHUNK OF MY ASSSSSSSSS

[narrat0r12]

@trungvuongk2 Wow, you took a comment from another video and now you're REALLY funny.

[trungvuongk2]

@narrat0r12 sorry if it offended you in any way i am just sharing the lol

[rockerdog167]

@trungvuongk2 Can't unhear!!! DX

[MIGU3L2K]

@trungvuongk2 nice one i actually heard a chunk of my as lol =)

[Katingaan]

@trungvuongk2 CANNOT UNHEAR!!

[TFSONICFAN100]

there is no chin under chuck norris' beard

there is only another fist

[videocritic2463]

@TFSONICFAN100 But if he shaved his beard and there was no fist under there?

[undeadrising2]

@videocritic2463 his beard breaks razors

[videocritic2463]

@undeadrising2 He has an special Diamond edge augmented encrusted razorblade for his pubic hair XD

[ThePajamaGuy]

Chuck Norris poured some blue paint over some midgets. Thus, the Smurfs were born.

[MrJunward]

gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa­ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy­yyyyyyy

[darkguy1243]

@MrJunward If i were you i would erase that comment before he finds you and turns your whole family gay

[PresidentDRCI]

@MrJunward yoooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuu­uuuuu

(see, I can type a lot of letters too! it' doesn't make you more important.)

[kagesoultaker]

Why didn't the world end? It was too afraid of CHUCK NORRIS!

[MrBagelmon]

Some people need help...

[MrBagelmon]

@MrBagelmon

*cough cough* nastalgia critic or whatever he calls himself

[Perkyguy]

Why the hell do I have a 204 thumbs up comment and its not in the top comments section???

[Noureddin91]

Chuck Norris ate a whole cake once before being told there was a stripper inside.

[R4Zy3L]

The CIA actually paid Chuck Norris to kill Bil Laden.

[Perkyguy]

@R4Zy3L And it took them 10 years to gather the money. Which was used for toilet paper, because Chuck Norris only wipes his ass with 100 dollar bills.

[raidenkurosaki345]

Okay umm I will not say Chucky here killed bin laden because brave soliders did, they avenged those who lost precious ones in 9/11 and some people more than likely died in this operation, so please people, get a grip.

[Perkyguy]

@raidenkurosaki345 And you get a sense of humor. We all know it was chuck noris that nailed osama

[raidenkurosaki345]

@Perkyguy Well I do have a sense of humor, and if you didnt lose someone during 9/11 then you can just leave this topic alone. And no it wasn't Chuck.

[Perkyguy]

@raidenkurosaki345 Well thats the official story, cuz chuck's involvement must be kept secret

[raidenkurosaki345]

@Perkyguy Ok...I am going to stop this one sided conversation because you aren't taking this seriously.

[mordigoth]

CHUCK JUST KILLED OSAMA BIN LADEN!

[newyy1]

So I heard Chuck Norris got back from his hunting trip today…

[SgtZaqq]

@newyy1 ACHUCKANORIIIIS!

[superheadfreak]

@newyy1 wrong. He came back from his killing trip...

[matrixfan127]

@newyy1 That's funny, I thought it was 2 months ago... -Matrixfan127.Message sent July 16th...

[Blacksun388]

@newyy1 You heard wrong. 'Hunting' and 'Killing' are two different things.

[JayTheHawk13]

@newyy1 Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting because hunting implies failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

[cytorakdemon]

@newyy1

Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting, hunting implies the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes Killing.

[ackbarfan5556]

@newyy1 No Chuck doesn't hunt because there is a chance of failure.

Chuck Norris goes killing.

[linkanator]

@newyy1 He never wen't hunting, I know this because the world still has people in it.

[dolphen111]

@newyy1 Human is now an endangered species

[jonsandersgame]

@newyy1 Chuck Norris doesn't hunt....Hunting refers the possiblity of failure, Chuck Norris goes killing

[schwasha000]

CHUCK NORRIS KILLED bin Laden!!!!!!!!! Was deployed an hour before the news...

[grot666666]

CANT STAND THE  AWESOMENESS!!!

[TFSONICFAN100]

chuck norris can eat a hammer, carry all the people in the world and take a shotgun blast while standing

one day, Chuck Norris leaned against a bu