Let's Take A Long Look At Last Alert part 4/7

[wizeoaldowl]

@wizeoaldowl Nevermind. Ignore that comment. Poor eyesight for the lose.

[wizeoaldowl]

You know, this game really was extremely hard up to this point. Let's just take away the guns from our regular enemies.

[Sonic619]

I am Heavy Warrior Guy Kazama and THIS is my....

Damn it.

[shimazu32]

The enemies in the communication room area are friggin jiangshi/kyonshi, those goofy chinese hopping zombies. The white thing hanging from their faces are magic scrolls. What the hell?

[grottypissedstained]

7:08

[TeenAgeZiggy]

I started watching these to see the level-ups.

[0Z0e0r0o0Zero]

Wait, are those Hopping Chinese Zombies-Vampires?

[TimrodDX]

The modern-day US army clearly needs to take a lesson from 1988 and give all their soldiers random and seemingly nonsensical promotions to ranks that may or may not actually exist. We could win Afghanistan if they'd just promote somebody to "Terrorist Buster".

[ZiloTheStrange]

"Fullarmor Guy"? Sounds like the Fullmetal Alchemist's brother. *rimshot*

[vizi02]

"Oh, really? Well, that's interesting..."

Lee must be the most badass villain ever in the history of everything. It takes real balls to take the news of your potential death like that.

[MalamiteLtd]

@vizi02 Don't you mean "Oh, reary?"

[Lactose723]

If I'm not mistaken I believe you're fighting Jiang Shi. Basically zombies risen from the dead. You've been fighting in a zombie martial arts tournament. Mr. Miyagi would have never made it through that.

[Doperwtje81]

So Khadaffi was actually killed by a Ex-metal soldier wielding a grenade spread-gun that his electric whip couldn't block? CNN totally lied to me!

[JanitorAntisocial]

Did anyone notice when Garcia uttered his first line ("to, uh...kill you, Mr. Lee.") he wasn't using that stupid drunk voice?

It's as if the voice actor was all like, "OH OH I have an idea for a good voice for this guy now! I'll start doing it in future recordings; it'll be AWESOME."

[JDWtri]

You are no match for my kung-fu *gunshot*

[Kuronji]

I love how even after they manage to cause some damage with the tougher traps...they always give you health packs right after, bamboo, electricity etc.

[DorianCairne]

"Dr Garcia, how is the deveropment, of race rerations in the gaming industry, coming arong?"

"Ha ha ha! This game should set them back about twenty years!"

[TheToast7]

I would like to submit a challenge to any retsupurae fan who thinks they can handle it:

Count how many people Guy Kazama has murdered.

[MrGuyPwnsYou]

Wait... an evil mastermind running a martial arts competition, and a commando infiltrates it to kill him...

His sidekicks include an absolutely massive dude, and a guy with claws and a partial face covering...

OF COURSE! TEKKEN!

[ItsVince72592]

It's Master Asia!

[DaRkLoRdZoRc]

I think those suare-headed guys in purple were supposed to be kyonshi - Chinese vampires, basically.

Why are they in Last Alert?

Well, why is ANYTHING in Last Alert? You answer that and I'll answer you on why there's vampires running around.

[DaRkLoRdZoRc]

@DaRkLoRdZoRc *square-headed

[DorianCairne]

This random dojo-type-place full of exploding women must have been a clinic. This makes perfect sense. Guy Kazama knows this because he is a former Major. And probably also because he's hallucinating this whole thing and will wake up screaming in a straight jacket five minutes after the credits.

[DukeOnkled]

Guy's using martial arts. It's Gun-kata.

[DukeOnkled]

@DukeOnkled

Oh christ, you actually made that joke in the video. Shit, I feel stupid now.

[pockypurse]

"I don't think you're fighting fair!"

I died.

[CommanderMantis]

Why does Doctor Garcia sound like a drunk Norm McDonald?

[ek180]

I am so offended for every ethnic group that is represented in this game, even though I don't belong to any of them. Good lord.

[yushi560]

god, Mr. Lee's voiceacting is worse than the voiceacting of the chinese people in Deus Ex.

[yushi560]

lol the guy with the purple hair looks like Vegeta.

[DarkArtistKaiser]

Apart of me wants to say, their cultists. They appear cult like and their in a cult like area.

[RiiidgeRaacer]

I know you made a joke about fighting the undead earlier, but at this point you seem to be literally fighting the undead, those guys with the tags on their faces that walk with their arms outstretched, they're freaking chinese mythos zombies.

[leviathan1173]

Did they have a 13-year-old boy do all the voices for this game?

[XenonDraco]

@leviathan1173 Hey! I'm 13 and I find that insulting! XD

[leviathan1173]

@XenonDraco

I'm insulting and I find that 13.

[madman6782]

im pretty sure Laser Soft changed their name to Infinity Ward after this game XD

[gman484]

@madman6782 You sir have just won

[rjakobi]

Now to start the 500-seeded *BANGBANGBANG* erm...300-seeded martial arts tournament

[unhappyplow]

my penis is monsterous

[Piroborian]

@unhappyplow Rearry? Werr, that's interesting.

[CSB]

02:02

"uhhh sonic boom!" hahaha

[VGclass]

We are Marshal.

[spartonberry]

Actually, Sin/Shin Nihon Laser Soft just changed their name to Telenet soon after this game (and Cosmic Fantasy 1).

[WhiteTiger225]

11:15 not only do the women not blood, they also just fall to their knees and cry. YAY SEXISM!

[PaperMario15]

7:09 That's my favorite voice clip in the entire game.

[jman3267]

Those things are the Chinese equivalent of vampires.

I'm not joking...

[WhiteTiger225]

@jman3267 As well as Zombie.

[amuro473]

is that really their voices

[boswelox23]

They really missed a trick not making one of the classes "Fullarmor Kazama"

[horngatekeeper]

this is every action anime ever, isn't it? or it will be once the giant robots show up.

[Methusael86]

Dragon Ball would have been so much more interesting if their martial arts tournaments had people just shooting all over the place.

[sagacious03]

This is the wierdest martial arts tournament I've ever seen!

[SamuraiFoochs]

God, the Colonel's workplace is an OSHA nightmare. Laeer floors, electric conveyor belts...

[90sHeroMAXD]

Wewie Docuta Wawee

[LinkinPink99]

Marshal Arts

[bulletmunchr]

3:15 Is that fucking Maximillion Pegasus??????

[MisterDynamite]

This is some of the greatest voice acting ever! Metal Gear Solid can't hold a candle to this masterpiece!

[MJ1284]

@MisterDynamite

Snake: "Candle?"

[ElboNoodel]

"How is the deveropment, of your urtimate weapon, coming arong?"

I lost it.

[rizuhbull]

Jesus Christ that was racist.

[Megamildman]

This is like a Godfrey Ho movie in game form.

[PAMuffinMan]

I like to imagine him running through the tournament shooting everyone and these guys are just the poor security guards trying to restrain this psychopath.

[SugoiSugar]

Why does the bad guy wear a glittery shirt?

[stellybellyboo]

I just got back from the ER and this made my day.

[Hepathos]

CIA dog? Dond you mean, DOG OF THE AMS?

[demonicagent]

to answer you question those enemies are animated corpses

those little slips of paper are like commands that a person would put onto the forehead of the corpse and the corpse would obey

basically they're ancient Chinese Zombies

[loggancun]

5:55

you could call him "med" pac man

[MidnightVoyager]

The ladies seem to drop to their knees and BURST INTO TEARS before vanishing. WTF

[rocco777]

God it sounds like every male character was voiced by the same twenty year old non-voice actor.

[Highstar25]

Gai Kazama does 'marshal' arts like Sagara Sousuke does. 

[EponymousKid]

What comes after Heavy Warrior is, in my opinion, the best of the bunch - because it doesn't make even a little sense.

[ChnBustr]

Honestly, the best part of this game is anxiously waiting to find out what the next rank is.

As the experience points go up: "Ooh, oooh it's getting closer. What could possibly be better than 'Fullarmor Guy'?"

*DING* HEAVY WARRIOR!

"Oh hot-DAMN. Didn't see that coming! ...So... now I guess to wait for the next one. What could POSSIBLY beat 'Heavy Warrior'!?"

[heyitsfp]

Mike Haggar with a gun?!

[rjakobi]

Those women EXPLODE?

THIS IS THE BEST GAME EVER!

[JanitorAntisocial]

"Soh, Cubex55 is doing eh rets pray of aw game?"

"No, that's slowbeef and Diabetus's job, Mr. Lee."

[handsomebrick]

gun fu is properly called gunkata

[BlueEmeraldX]

You just have to laugh at the bad Engrish voice acting at 3:18.

Oh, and I'm betting on the next rank being called something cheesy like "Ace Gunner". XD

[Linkeh24]

Level 99 is definitely GCPD officer.

[OneWithTheNight]

Is it just me, or does Dr. Garcia look an awful lot like Revolver Ocelot with a monocle?

[slyolepup]

@OneWithTheNight haha I was thinkin that as well but he's missing the "epic" mullet that comes with the snake title

[Rogueofmv]

"That was a guest voice by me, Diabetus."

Oh Diabetus, don't be so down on yourself... :)

[Mesarphelous]

I've been having quite a shitty week. The only woman I've ever loved has abandoned me. I'm tired, depressed, and dead inside. But I'm grateful that I can count on Retsupurae to cheer me up even in the most dire of circumstances.

[penzisasuperstar]

This building PROBABLY used to be a clinic. WHAT?!

[Deathspeak2u]

Guy may have a large muscle mass but is he more muscular than Jack Slate?

[PickpocketSan]

Hmm...This mysterious video SEEMS like a retsupurae...It probably was...Oh well. I might as well just like it and add it to my favorites anyway.

[MrSpannytheRandom]

They misspelled "listened" with "listend"

[Sneep29]

"HOW DARE YOU GET -past my precious whip."

[LordCorinth]

this game is soooo kaizo!

[Grammaton485]

You want eggroll?

[90sHeroMAXD]

Those things Slowbeef was curious about (mr.power jumper's stage) they are Chinese zombie/vampire things. I am reary sherious

[DustInTheWind64]

Marshal arts=Gun-Fu

[LordFunkyFist]

I don't know about everyone else but I always anticipate when Guy is about to level up so I can see what Stupidly Awesome Title he's gonna get.

[Mast3rFr3aky]

7:53

Uh, purple beekeepers?

[jojomon91]

God that guy with the muscles sounds like Cousin Eddy from Twisted Metal: Head On! XP

[ahshorn]

Mr. Lee sounds like an Oriental Truman Capote.

[FEfan56]

Slowbeef, is this conference you're going to like the video conference held by the bad guys at the start of these levels?

If that's the case, then i wish you luck in completing your super weapon in one month good sir.

[LovelesEntertainment]

3:17 I dornt see anry steleotyrpe hele

[Infaf09]

you guys definitely have to do guest voices for games someday

[wikid32]

"OH rerey?"

[DelSponie]

There are no more terrorist all over the world.

[Pooky1991]

The character you play as is unstoppable>:D

[Kukadin]

I think the guys are supposed to be jiang-shi with talismans on their faces

[jettythesunfish]

@Kukadin Yup jiang-shi. Doesn't really make sense in context, but then again, we have a guy that looks like SlashMan, so...

[slowbeef]

for the record though, i did play last alert to research this role

[FinalGamerJames]

@slowbeef But of course! We wouldn't expect any less from you than actual gaming research. STANDARDS MAN!

[pyramidheadkitten9]

throughout the entire video i was just waiting until one of your bastards said it.

"marshal arts"

that made my day even though i was expecting it.

[RainbowFission]

I carry around a spread gun that occasionally shoots rockets because martial arts.

[mrdrsuperguy]

hum rinterresting



[tomeoffinland]

Goddamned. Motherfucking. Kyonshies!

[the0vermind]

so retsupurae is doing let's play now?

[AcceleratingUniverse]

@the0vermind Saying as Slowbeef invented Let's Plays, it really isn't that surprising...

[inujimma]

@the0vermind Actually it is a Retsuprae of Cubex55's LP of Last Alert, which was stated in the first video. Cubex55 just didn't have commentary on the original videos.

[LessthanJake14]

@inujimma Hence the 'Let's Take a Long Look At', rather than 'Let's Play'.

[baconkong]

7:49

Those things are Chinese Vampires.

Trust me, I'm a processional weeaboo.

[leonflash]

Guy Kazama: Master of Combat

Master of Comebacks

[pura769377]

"HEE HEE, GUY I'M GON' DUHSTROOOY YEEEEW."

[xValis77x]

@pura769377 almost sounds brokeback mountainish

[ItsReallyMario]

Gun Fu Christian Bale....I get it

[LessthanJake14]

I am Heavy Warrior Guy..Kazama.

And THIS, is my grenade launcher spreadgun. It fires custom infinitely spawning missiles as well as three baseballs. It costs 400,000 lives to fire this gun...for twelve seconds.

I was waiting for you guys to upload this part, solely because I wanted to use this gag.

[NoughNeaux]

@LessthanJake14 Y dunt you just coment on the blip vid?

[LessthanJake14]

@NoughNeaux Don't have an account, may get an account later but not right now.

The Blip video is one huge video, less relevance.

[mattr75]

Man, these spelling mistakes are hilarious.

[GrawrawrLPs]

OREE REE

[OTCGreen]

REARY?



[T3hWaffleman]

Marshal, Marshal, Marshal!

[HHKelevra]

Mr. Lee sounds like that foreign kid from Home Movies. Except a million times more embarrassing.

[somahiru]

The guys with square paperthings on their heads... I think they are chinese zombies.

Yes, this game was so ahead of it's time it dared to put zombies on it.

[phalanx1234]

@somahiru They're called Jian-shi, for the record.

[somahiru]

@phalanx1234 Thanks c:

Wasn't able to remember their name at the time I posted that.

[ROFLitsJobe]

The high pitched "really" made this episode

[GenericSteve764]

I was half expecting that Chinese guy to suddenly yell "JACK SRAAATE!"

That reminds me, at what level do you achieve the Longshoreman X rank?

[supershadey09]

@GenericSteve764 XD nice

[emperor20]

I am gerring rarry escited abourt the ...TO HELL WITH MY SCRIPT!

[EponymousKid]

In my opinion, they still manage to top "Fullarmor Guy" once or twice later on.

[EternalGuardian07]

So you went from being made out of metal to just wearing a lot of armor in a few ranks.

[Haloriffic]

Enjoying the shit outta this

[ggamer2004]

3:40 "It should uh be completed within a month."

That epic face was unneeded for that line.

[AlexanderEsa]

oh what heavy warrior? you can't go from fullarmor guy to that, that's bullshit

[IntrospectIntellect]

I wonder if when Guy Kazama reached the level of "Super Hero" if he was invited into the Justice League or not.

[AlexanderEsa]

I hope the next level you reach is FULLARMOR GUYDUDE

[EbolaZidane]

But I already watched all of it...

Okay, if you insist.

[BCF919]

This isn't a story from enter the dragon at all

[Deckof51]

"To, uh... Kill you, mr. Lee"

FLAWLESS DIALOGUE

[Urmean15]

@Deckof51

rearry...werr

dass intahresthing

[BackgroundBailey]

@Deckof51 Indeed.

"Oh reary? That's interesting."

You can tell how surprised Mr. Lee is after finding out the assassination plot on his life. Marvelous voice acting.

[Masterofthewater]

@Deckof51 Oh rearry?

[ManfredvonKarma7]

Just to point out, "Marshal" is the British spelling, and an accepted American spelling. Plenty of mistakes around, but that managed to be correct.

[EponymousKid]

@ManfredvonKarma7 It's not the normal American spelling? The U.S. Marshals seem to think it is.

[ManfredvonKarma7]

@EponymousKid I did not comment on whether or not it is the normal spelling, because frankly I wasn't sure. Regardless of whether it is commonly used or not it is still an accepted American spelling, as I said.

[EponymousKid]

@ManfredvonKarma7 Didn't mean to seem didactic, I was actually confused.

[sirfragalot92]

@ManfredvonKarma7 Well, according to the first vid in this series, they were both hammered while doing this, so I think making a joke about nothing would be pretty common, no?

[Benjeezytube]

The little square-head guys are Chinese Zombies called Kyonshi or something similar. Hsein-Ko from Darkstalkers is one, too.

Now back to my nerd cave!

[qwesx]

Did they just have one single VA for the entire damn game?

[newpageone]

@qwesx Yeah, check the link in the first video. I watched the whole thing last night and I was crying by the end it was so funny.

[RMD00]

@qwesx I think it was only 2 people who did the voice acting.

[Ghalheart]

@qwesx Maybe 3 voice actors at most. One for all the female voices, one for all the mooks, and one dedicated to channeling Guy Kazama's badassery into an audible form that WON'T kill us outright.

[Neotails8762]

I've heard Mr Lee's upcoming line in another video.

Trust me, it is SO worth the wait.

[CamouflageJeans]

3:00 to 3:55 is the best part of this series imo.

Ronery! I'm sro ronery!

[hola4adola]

so no 7 parts? you guys got too drunk, huh

[narcolepticchairftw]

So 2 more parts left or 1?

[SleepingxWithxGhosts]

10:50 'listend' instead of listened.

[16ktsgamma]

The Boxed people from the Superbowl return.

[bobbyewing311]

your marshal arts.... gun....... I took Gunfu, okay? LMFAO

[NeverForgetWizet]

Good luck at the conference, son.

[narcolepticchairftw]

I just woke up after sleeping for about 25 hours (unemployed and friendless - living the dream!) to see this in my subscription box.

Makes my morning so much better. 

[ENM173]

Uh.... Didn't they spell Marshal correctly?