Mary looks like she cud be Ellen Degenres daughter, plz don't take any offence of this... but according to me u do look a lot like her (but youngert ofc) :3
well the literal term "androgyny" means literally that you dont identify as female or male or that you identify as both female and male. this description of androgyny has also become very popular within the community in my area i have noticed and it is quite frustrating because my partner is ACTUALLY androgynous/genderqueer and has fought really hard to find "himself" and to find a place in the community and now all these formerly know lesebians are coming out as genderqueer.
@HelloSexKitten and i feel that it, in a way, de-values his genuine struggles of coming to this realization when it wasnt so "hot" to do so. do you feel me at all?? lol i hope so lol
(cont.) I get a lot of comments from my family, sometimes joking...sometimes not. "Dyke", "lesbian", "playing for the other team" type stuff. It does not bother me that someone might look at me and think I'm a lesbian...it bothers me that people instantly tag a negative vibe to any comments or stares that they give. Society has come a long way in accepting us more androgynous women, but it still has a LONG way to go in some parts of the world.
This is such a great topic! I am very androgynous myself, but also I'm heterosexual. I have very, very short hair, don't do the makeup thing, wear a lot of unisex clothes, and have always been considered one of the guys. I'm comfortable with who I am, but as I've gotten older, I find it difficult to not feel like an outcast by others around me. I get the weird looks, the whispering, the "sirs" at restaurants...it's hard....(to be cont.)
I've always been androgynous even BEFORE I can out as lesbian so androgyny is not limited to sexaul orientation or even somene who is strictly straight. My father's new wifes' style and look about her is androgynous and she JUST got married. Just an observation that it's not limited to sexuality or lesbians.
@GabbyXena100 Frozen bananas? WTF!? Never tried em. They looked like popsicles lmfao. Thanks for letting me know that. Now I feel stupid and unobservant lol jk. Now I want a frozen banana.
@LadyGM720 Really? You've never had a frozen banana? They're great. They're just chocolate covered bananas on a stick. Don't feel stupid and unobservant. I may just be creepy and paying WAY too much attention.
Ja, I deff agree with the days thing, somedays I feel girly, some days I feel like wearing baggy jeans and a vest. Also, Tegan has ptosis. I like Tegan and sara, but Tegan's hotter. :P
I'm on the other side of the fence on this.I think Tegan's personality is more butch as she seems to assert her power over women in a more frequent,flirty,confident manner.But,I find Sara looks more butch more ofter.Tegan could pass as femme with her hair grown out.To me Sara cannot pass as femme.Whatevs,Tegan is boss in my little lesbian world.
I'm on the other side of the fence on this.I think Tegan's personality is more butch as she seems to assert her power over women in a more frequent,flirty,confident manner.But,I find Sara looks more butch more ofter.Tegan could pass as femme with here hair grown out.To me Sara cannot pass as femme.Whatevs,Tegan is boss in my little lesbian world.
I'm on the other side of the fence on this.I think Tegan's personality is more butch as she seems to assert her power over women in a more frequent,flirty,confident manner.But,I find Sara looks more butch more ofter.Tegan could pass as femme with here hair grown out.To me Sara cannot pass as femme.Whatevs,Tegan is boss in my little lesbian world.
I'm on the other side of the fence on this.I think Tegan's personality is more butch as she seems to assert her power over women in a more frequent,flirty,confident manner.But,I find Sara looks more butch more ofter.Tegan could pass as femme with here hair grown out.To me Sara cannot pass as femme.Whatevs,Tegan is boss in my little lesbian world.
I'm on the other side of the fence on this.I think Tegan's personality is more butch as she seems to assert her power over women in a more frequent,flirty,confident manner.But,I find Sara looks more butch more ofter.Tegan could pass as femme with here hair grown out.To me Sara cannot pass as femme.Whatevs,Tegan is boss in my little lesbian world.
I'm on the other side of the fence on this.I think Tegan's personality is more butch as she seems to assert her power over women in a more frequent,flirty,confident manner.But,I find Sara looks more butch more ofter.Tegan could pass as femme in with here hair grown out.To me Sara cannot pass as femme.Whatevs,Tegan is boss in my little lesbian world.
I agree soooo much. Some days I feel like putting on a blazer over a white tank top and jeans and other days I feel like wearing a skirt and my hair in a pretty bun. I hate it when I wear something that's more femme or more butch/androgynous and people have to say, "whoa, look at you" or something. I just wear what I wear depending on what I feel like that day.
pink cellophane?..hehehe That was cute! I love the idea of androgyny! It would be wonderful if that was the place we were headed. My partner and I would definitely both be more femme identified but I want the choice to be either or (or somewhere in between!!) whenever I feel like it!..hehe Great video...love you two doing them together.
I agree with most everything that your video said, but I found it to in a way imply that those who identify as butch are trapped by some sort of heteronormative relationship pattern, and I don't think that is necessarily the case. I may be oversensitive because I am super masculine, but it felt somewhat like you were suggesting that those who are androgynous are more free than butches. If anything, the lack of freedom that I feel comes from people reacting to me, not me towards myself.
I like how ya'll talk about the way you dress is just how you feel that day. I agree 100 percent. but you know my sister is like my best friend and she is straight and she to will wear a skirt one day and the next walk down the road with a hoodie an a beanie. I think the trend for androgyny is becoming a way for all women (gay/straight) to feel comfortable in their own skin.
I'm in the middle as well. Didn't Ellen say that was called "chapstick"? Not butch, and not lipstick, but chapstick? I have a different sort of respect for all three "types" and everything in between. I love that they all exist. (:
I'm in the middle as well. Didn't Ellen say that was called "chapstick"? Not butch, and not lipstick, but chapstick? I have a different sort of respect for all three "types" and everything in between. I love that they all exist. (:
i'm fascinated by the trend towards androgyny. it offers all of so many more choices in the ways in which we wish to externalize our inner identities. i am confused though, by the sheer number of younger queers adopting the "justin bieber" hair style. could someone please clue me in?
I'm a guy, and I completely agree with this video. I am definitely not a stereotypical guy, but neither am I effeminate. I prefer just to be me, which is slightly androgynous. I think it's fun, it's truthful, and it is my personality externalized...
(Part 3! last one..) To me it feels like another way that the masculine is privileged over the feminine, and the feminist in me wants to make sure that the ladies that prefer to wear the skirt all the time aren't seen as somehow less valuable or less lesbian. I would love to hear your thoughts on this! :)
@nothere3579 -- hey lady, thanks for reaching out with your thoughts. first, it seems like a good time to remind you kind folks that, in the spirit of not boring everybody to tears, we try to make concise videos that stick to the topic of the week and answer the question in about 3 or 4 minutes. this week's topic was androgyny. butch ideals are closely related to this topic, that's why it came up. In no way was I slighting the fairer side of our sex. it just wasn't the topic this week :)
As a lesbian who identifies much further toward the femme side of the spectrum, I feel like I am constantly fighting the trend of the lesbian community toward androgyny/butch identities. I have nothing but respect for ladies who rock the menswear, but I also think that the femme experience can be equally challenging, especially when feeling that our identity does not hold as much "value" in the lesbian community. (continued again!.. :) )
I love you guys so much and I really appreciate you sharing your views. However, I do kind of take issue with one thing. Mary, the way you said "I think that *butch* is valuable" at 2:27 and describe it as a "valuable strata of the gay/lesbian social circle" felt to me as though butch and androgynous identities are the only ones that you consider to hold value. (continued...)
Is androgyny really the right word here? Isn't it just different facets of womanhood? To introduce any maleness into the mix, you'd think it would logically follow that the person would be attracted to men, or at least bi.
See, I call myself queer because though I prefer women, I don't want to limit myself to just one sex. If I happen to fall in love with a guy, cool. Whatever, but that's not what I look for. Sexuality is fluid, so I allow it to be such.
Actually, I think queer is starting to become the umbrella term for the LGBT community, which would be nice and not nearly as much of a mouthful.
Mary i'm totally with you, sometimes i wanna wear i dress and wear my hair down and sometimes i wanna wear my hair back in a messie bun in a tank and basketball shorts, why must ppl freak out whenever i'm wearing a dress, its annoying and kind of uncomfortable and makes me not wanna venure out and where dresses ever, but i do it cuz i feel like and thats the only reason i have to give them.
you guys are hotter than Tegan and Sara :P Just sayin'.
I think it's also because androgyny is more widely accepted nowadays so many people who like to be the 'tweenies' or feel like the 'in-betweens' come out as that.
I hope you are wrong about the butch-femme dynamic going by the wayside....I think we are seeing a resurgence in it in the older crowd to tell you the truth, and it IS still a very viable dynamic. I'm butch and proud, and I know many proud femmes. Love your videos, keep it up gals.
If people call me dyke I wish I could tell them Im genderqueer but thats not a word in my language. I sometimes wonder if theres a need for a word for that exists only in the US, but then I realize Im not in the US either. And I do exist.
Dyke is really not something that applies to me if anything, call me faggot. I think thats something Id actually have an answer to. It would be easier to have to be defensive about liking boys than it is being defensive about liking girls.
I read about lesbianism in the 80's. In the UK, it seemed butch-femme relationships weren't common in lesbian communities interviewed (surprisingly). These women thought perhaps society focused on (& remembers) butch-femmes as they mimic heterosexual couples more.
Or, perhaps there were more butch-femmes as they mimic heterosexual relationships & they 'followed' these lines because maybe then society would accept lesbianism as a valid sexuality, relationship & lifestyle?
I would give ANYTHING to be able to walk down the street in a skirt or heels and makeup with very feminine hair styles and such but being born female in a male body, and being unable to pass at present as female due to my facial hair and large masculine build (had to de-transition due to lack of finances and access to medical professionals) this is pretty much impossible unless I want to be seen as a weirdo by the general public. You girls might be seen as a little "off" being that you typically
appear rather androgynous or more on the butch side if you went out "en femme", so to speak, but you wouldn't be seen as weirdos. Most people would think "hmm, that girl looks really cute in her dress and such with her really short hair and stuff, it's a little weird but still normal" albeit subconsciously, whereas someone like myself would be seen as a threat to the societal gender dichotomy and would generally be shunned, particularly in my state. God I would give anything to have been born
genetically female just like all of you, and I would be absolutely proud and happy to be a gay genetic female but I HATE being trans!!!! I'm a girl, NOT a guy!!!! Why did this have to happen?!?!?! Anyway, I digress... sorry.
bahahahahahaha ptosis.. that video is goooold. i dont know why people can't tell them apart.. i can tell a mile away which is which.. they seam very different to me.. anywho. this was a good subject this week because i feel exactly as you two... im andro, i just wear what makes me feel comfortable and just because there has always been a feminine "ideal", it does not make me want to fit into that any more or less..
you guys are totally eating choco-nanas! you guys rock, i really dig your ideas about butch/ femme, androgyny and just having different days, you know? btw tegan is the one with ptosis.
I love the androgynous look. As I became more comfortable with my sexuality, I started changing the way I presented myself. I wanted to experiment and find a look I really liked. I even cut my hair super short, like pixie status. I've been told I'm androgynous. I don't have a super femme or super butch look. Sure, I have short hair, but I love doing my make up. And sometimes I do like to dress in cute, frilly shirts, and sometimes I don't. I love that women have more options now.
I have gotten to the point where I have stopped trying to label myself. I just wear whatever I like, whether it be baggy, army fatigue pants and a t-shirt, tight jeans and a feminine blouse, or skirts. Interestingly enough, I feel the MOST comfortable in casual, androgynous, "unisex" clothes - just the standard t-shirts and jeans. I feel most like myself when my style has a balance of masculine and feminine qualities.
i can't believe nobody commented on the 'Wild Beast Predators on the Prowl' music you chose to compliment the devouring of our chocolate covered bananas :)
@marybside i had to go back and watch a second time because i was so focused on trying to figure out what you guys were eating lol, but yess that music is perfect it made me giggle. you guys make my day every single time i watch you together. cute as can be, you guys talk the way i think and its great.
i really like androgyny and the androgynous look, but i get frustrated because (at least lately with the hipster andro fad) it doesn't really allow for bigger-bodied people. but i guess all fashion today is like that :/
oh my god. all of this week i've been debating whether or not to ask you guys to make a video on EXACTLY this topic. specifically, I was going to ask: what makes you dress the way you dress? and this video exactly answers that question! thanks so much guys! and i know you've gotten this compliment a million times but seriously, you guys are the epitome of the perfect lesbian couple :) i'd absolutely love it if one of you would respond to the message i sent you!
I hate when people assume I am either butch or femme by the way I dress. My partner calls me a tween since I can go either way depending on my mood for the day...lol.
I find it refreshing that trends towards gay women's identity and self perception are expanding. It allows us to be more free with ourselves, how we feel about ourselves, and how we perceive our role in society. Sexuality is fluid.. the perception of this sexuality should follow suit. I'm in the camp of .. provided its not offensive, wear whatever it is that makes you feel good.
1. I like the move toward queer and androgyny. it allows more flexibility and less of a tendency for people to compromise their individuality to fit into gender roles.
2. Tegan is (now) the one with the longer hair + ptosis; Sara is the smaller, quieter and "femme"-ier one.
It's so true, I hate feeling like I have to either wear boyish clothes or girlish clothes. It's like..I wear what I want to wear. It shouldn't be an either/or equation.
I hate it when i take a shit and water hits mah butt.
TheSoapbottle 4 days ago
@TheSoapbottle
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHA
mygurllluv 1 day ago
don't talk about Tegan, and Sara if you don't even know which is which. what did they have to do with this "Androgyny" video?
DONE.
amazingpony 1 month ago
they have tegan and sara mixed up!
besides the fact that tegan is the one with ptosis, I would think that mary b's type is sara, and that jess' type is tegan.
just guessing
3:55 BARE-ly :)
whyiaskyou79 4 months ago
You two have AMAAAAZING hair!!!!
greatfulkitteh 5 months ago
Interesting subject matter.....
You raise very interesting issues
You both need a butch hair cut ?
DomBarber 7 months ago
man i want ice cream now
prettypv94 7 months ago
Mary looks like she cud be Ellen Degenres daughter, plz don't take any offence of this... but according to me u do look a lot like her (but youngert ofc) :3
Naruava 7 months ago 2
gave her a faggot
TheOmniWolf 10 months ago
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The Look on Jess's face at 0:04 kills me :)
hoehawk99 11 months ago
The look on lori's face at 0:04 kills me :)))
hoehawk99 11 months ago
@hoehawk99 I'm sorry. who's Lori? theres Jess on the left and Mary B on the right
xXmockingjay 10 months ago
i think your just maryb and jess.. no labels needed =] and tegan and sara..
angelgross2012 1 year ago
omg! You guys are so cute! :)
laurautd 1 year ago
well the literal term "androgyny" means literally that you dont identify as female or male or that you identify as both female and male. this description of androgyny has also become very popular within the community in my area i have noticed and it is quite frustrating because my partner is ACTUALLY androgynous/genderqueer and has fought really hard to find "himself" and to find a place in the community and now all these formerly know lesebians are coming out as genderqueer.
HelloSexKitten 1 year ago
@HelloSexKitten and i feel that it, in a way, de-values his genuine struggles of coming to this realization when it wasnt so "hot" to do so. do you feel me at all?? lol i hope so lol
HelloSexKitten 1 year ago
this was real interesting cheers :)
0123myers 1 year ago
(cont.) I get a lot of comments from my family, sometimes joking...sometimes not. "Dyke", "lesbian", "playing for the other team" type stuff. It does not bother me that someone might look at me and think I'm a lesbian...it bothers me that people instantly tag a negative vibe to any comments or stares that they give. Society has come a long way in accepting us more androgynous women, but it still has a LONG way to go in some parts of the world.
MissDjDePo 1 year ago 9
This is such a great topic! I am very androgynous myself, but also I'm heterosexual. I have very, very short hair, don't do the makeup thing, wear a lot of unisex clothes, and have always been considered one of the guys. I'm comfortable with who I am, but as I've gotten older, I find it difficult to not feel like an outcast by others around me. I get the weird looks, the whispering, the "sirs" at restaurants...it's hard....(to be cont.)
MissDjDePo 1 year ago 9
I've always been androgynous even BEFORE I can out as lesbian so androgyny is not limited to sexaul orientation or even somene who is strictly straight. My father's new wifes' style and look about her is androgynous and she JUST got married. Just an observation that it's not limited to sexuality or lesbians.
LadyGM720 1 year ago
hahahahahahaha!!! They're fast eating popsicles............ lol
LadyGM720 1 year ago
@LadyGM720 Haha. I think they're frozen bananas.Either way, the look delicious.
GabbyXena100 1 year ago
@GabbyXena100 Frozen bananas? WTF!? Never tried em. They looked like popsicles lmfao. Thanks for letting me know that. Now I feel stupid and unobservant lol jk. Now I want a frozen banana.
LadyGM720 1 year ago
@LadyGM720 Really? You've never had a frozen banana? They're great. They're just chocolate covered bananas on a stick. Don't feel stupid and unobservant. I may just be creepy and paying WAY too much attention.
GabbyXena100 1 year ago
@GabbyXena100 Naw. You're not creepy. You just can't help but pay close attention to Jess and Mary B like the rest of us Beaver Bunch whores lol.
LadyGM720 1 year ago
@LadyGM720 Thanks! And I prefer 'addict' instead of 'whore'. Whore sounds too.... No. Actually, whore sounds good!
GabbyXena100 1 year ago
@GabbyXena100 lmfao.
LadyGM720 1 year ago
And tatoo I think
6joebell 1 year ago
Sorry I'm tired and miss spelled ask.=\
=)
6joebell 1 year ago
Hello I just wanted to ack you what the tatoo on your arm is.
P.S.
I realy like your video.
=)
6joebell 1 year ago
I love the way Mary B. looks at you when your talking..... beautiful.
misscarolyn33 1 year ago
Ja, I deff agree with the days thing, somedays I feel girly, some days I feel like wearing baggy jeans and a vest. Also, Tegan has ptosis. I like Tegan and sara, but Tegan's hotter. :P
Bumblebee8997 1 year ago
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I'm on the other side of the fence on this.I think Tegan's personality is more butch as she seems to assert her power over women in a more frequent,flirty,confident manner.But,I find Sara looks more butch more ofter.Tegan could pass as femme with her hair grown out.To me Sara cannot pass as femme.Whatevs,Tegan is boss in my little lesbian world.
ydor 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
I'm on the other side of the fence on this.I think Tegan's personality is more butch as she seems to assert her power over women in a more frequent,flirty,confident manner.But,I find Sara looks more butch more ofter.Tegan could pass as femme with here hair grown out.To me Sara cannot pass as femme.Whatevs,Tegan is boss in my little lesbian world.
ydor 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
I'm on the other side of the fence on this.I think Tegan's personality is more butch as she seems to assert her power over women in a more frequent,flirty,confident manner.But,I find Sara looks more butch more ofter.Tegan could pass as femme with here hair grown out.To me Sara cannot pass as femme.Whatevs,Tegan is boss in my little lesbian world.
ydor 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
I'm on the other side of the fence on this.I think Tegan's personality is more butch as she seems to assert her power over women in a more frequent,flirty,confident manner.But,I find Sara looks more butch more ofter.Tegan could pass as femme with here hair grown out.To me Sara cannot pass as femme.Whatevs,Tegan is boss in my little lesbian world.
ydor 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
I'm on the other side of the fence on this.I think Tegan's personality is more butch as she seems to assert her power over women in a more frequent,flirty,confident manner.But,I find Sara looks more butch more ofter.Tegan could pass as femme with here hair grown out.To me Sara cannot pass as femme.Whatevs,Tegan is boss in my little lesbian world.
ydor 1 year ago
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ydor 1 year ago
Comment removed
ydor 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
I'm on the other side of the fence on this.I think Tegan's personality is more butch as she seems to assert her power over women in a more frequent,flirty,confident manner.But,I find Sara looks more butch more ofter.Tegan could pass as femme in with here hair grown out.To me Sara cannot pass as femme.Whatevs,Tegan is boss in my little lesbian world.
ydor 1 year ago
ARe those new glasses Jess?
TheBeefybri 1 year ago
Tegan all the way.
Titania1 1 year ago
jess is hot
texas0828 1 year ago
LOL @ the tegan and sara thing.
bajoink0 1 year ago
Comment removed
GodLovesMyMovie 1 year ago
Okay, someone gotta explain: queer to me now, I'm all confused.
KissingAllowed 1 year ago
mary would say babe on a stick.......
SkibbledInk 1 year ago
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not sure i'd mind being wrapped up in pink cellophane...
razotan 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
not sure i'd mind being wrapped up in pink cellophane...
razotan 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
not sure i'd mind being wrapped up in pink cellophane...
razotan 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
not sure i'd mind being wrapped up in pink cellophane...
razotan 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
not sure i'd mind being wrapped up in pink cellophane...
razotan 1 year ago
not sure i'd mind being wrapped up in pink cellophane...
razotan 1 year ago
tegan has ptosis.not sara.
Idkphish 1 year ago
Comment removed
taylor4life94 1 year ago
@taylor4life94 IT'S IN MY TOP FIVE FAVORITE YOU TUBE VIDEOS RIGHT NOW. I LOVE EVERY ASPECT OF THIS VIDEO. I ALSO LOVE CAPS LOCK.
taylor4life94 1 year ago
Sarah has a rounder face,
Tegan has a sharper jaw.
I can def tell them apart.
whyiaskyou79 1 year ago
@whyiaskyou79 you have it the other way around
aubreexxoo 1 year ago
@aubreexxoo
hahah. i just realized i spelled sara with an H lmao.prolly cuz thats how my sister spells it. that's a REAL error. haha.
as for my descriptions, I guess I should have picked characteristics that werent subjective.
I def think tegan has a more square jaw, and that sara's is sort of more oval. kind of depends on the angle too, tho.
Less disputable differences are that tegan is the one with the labret piercing and she has more forearm tattoo than sara
they cuttte.
whyiaskyou79 1 year ago
I agree soooo much. Some days I feel like putting on a blazer over a white tank top and jeans and other days I feel like wearing a skirt and my hair in a pretty bun. I hate it when I wear something that's more femme or more butch/androgynous and people have to say, "whoa, look at you" or something. I just wear what I wear depending on what I feel like that day.
aRtfReak6 1 year ago 2
pink cellophane?..hehehe That was cute! I love the idea of androgyny! It would be wonderful if that was the place we were headed. My partner and I would definitely both be more femme identified but I want the choice to be either or (or somewhere in between!!) whenever I feel like it!..hehe Great video...love you two doing them together.
PaintedRavensong 1 year ago
You should read Stone Butch Blues by Leslie Feinberg.
karelle78 1 year ago
tegan is the one with Ptosis. heh. she also happens to be my fav.
melodiesNdesires 1 year ago
What about a butch in a kilt?
MrBadassButch 1 year ago
Sara♥
noemisaysso 1 year ago
Tegan was the one that had Tosis
madres27 1 year ago
I agree with most everything that your video said, but I found it to in a way imply that those who identify as butch are trapped by some sort of heteronormative relationship pattern, and I don't think that is necessarily the case. I may be oversensitive because I am super masculine, but it felt somewhat like you were suggesting that those who are androgynous are more free than butches. If anything, the lack of freedom that I feel comes from people reacting to me, not me towards myself.
fosterthehedgehog 1 year ago
how about Mary is a special guest in ALL of your beaver bunch videos?! :D
smile4everandalways 1 year ago 3
I like how ya'll talk about the way you dress is just how you feel that day. I agree 100 percent. but you know my sister is like my best friend and she is straight and she to will wear a skirt one day and the next walk down the road with a hoodie an a beanie. I think the trend for androgyny is becoming a way for all women (gay/straight) to feel comfortable in their own skin.
redneckcookie11 1 year ago
Ooops, I didn't mean to post that twice. Sorry!
TayloreMishell 1 year ago
I'm in the middle as well. Didn't Ellen say that was called "chapstick"? Not butch, and not lipstick, but chapstick? I have a different sort of respect for all three "types" and everything in between. I love that they all exist. (:
TayloreMishell 1 year ago
I'm in the middle as well. Didn't Ellen say that was called "chapstick"? Not butch, and not lipstick, but chapstick? I have a different sort of respect for all three "types" and everything in between. I love that they all exist. (:
TayloreMishell 1 year ago
i'm fascinated by the trend towards androgyny. it offers all of so many more choices in the ways in which we wish to externalize our inner identities. i am confused though, by the sheer number of younger queers adopting the "justin bieber" hair style. could someone please clue me in?
1313kielly 1 year ago
epic intro!
megsvideos123 1 year ago
haha love the Tegan and Sara part...classic!
officialtwins 1 year ago 2
I'm a guy, and I completely agree with this video. I am definitely not a stereotypical guy, but neither am I effeminate. I prefer just to be me, which is slightly androgynous. I think it's fun, it's truthful, and it is my personality externalized...
colinlikeschapstick 1 year ago
that's an awesome way to describing what it means to be butch. Loves it!
missdivinestalls 1 year ago
maybe there should be a "she really likes her frozen banana" painting...
clydevalentine2240 1 year ago
ok, i thought i was the ONLY one who ate those chocolate covered bananas.... i get the ones with nuts.
as always, <3
loversr4ever 1 year ago
haha Tegan has ptosis! Great video, I think the movement towards androgyny is good as well
Minireb123 1 year ago
(Part 3! last one..) To me it feels like another way that the masculine is privileged over the feminine, and the feminist in me wants to make sure that the ladies that prefer to wear the skirt all the time aren't seen as somehow less valuable or less lesbian. I would love to hear your thoughts on this! :)
nothere3579 1 year ago
@nothere3579 -- hey lady, thanks for reaching out with your thoughts. first, it seems like a good time to remind you kind folks that, in the spirit of not boring everybody to tears, we try to make concise videos that stick to the topic of the week and answer the question in about 3 or 4 minutes. this week's topic was androgyny. butch ideals are closely related to this topic, that's why it came up. In no way was I slighting the fairer side of our sex. it just wasn't the topic this week :)
marybside 1 year ago
@marybside Wow that was a fast reply! Makes sense - thanks for your response. Love you guys :)
nothere3579 1 year ago
As a lesbian who identifies much further toward the femme side of the spectrum, I feel like I am constantly fighting the trend of the lesbian community toward androgyny/butch identities. I have nothing but respect for ladies who rock the menswear, but I also think that the femme experience can be equally challenging, especially when feeling that our identity does not hold as much "value" in the lesbian community. (continued again!.. :) )
nothere3579 1 year ago
I love you guys so much and I really appreciate you sharing your views. However, I do kind of take issue with one thing. Mary, the way you said "I think that *butch* is valuable" at 2:27 and describe it as a "valuable strata of the gay/lesbian social circle" felt to me as though butch and androgynous identities are the only ones that you consider to hold value. (continued...)
nothere3579 1 year ago
You two are so cute, I just want to pinch your faces.
And I totally agree with the video (:
Milllie91 1 year ago
Is androgyny really the right word here? Isn't it just different facets of womanhood? To introduce any maleness into the mix, you'd think it would logically follow that the person would be attracted to men, or at least bi.
paul20072007 1 year ago
@paul20072007 It has nothing to do with sexual attraction - that's the difference.
cautiousplay 1 year ago 2
Looking like Tegan and/or Sara is not necessarily a bad thing... XD Tegan and Sara are baaaaaabes.
CyberchondriacNess 1 year ago 2
Love when Mary is in the vids
superstaysee1 1 year ago 2
you said it all!
btw its Tegan who has the ptosis :P
viciousandchaotic 1 year ago
I completely agree.
See, I call myself queer because though I prefer women, I don't want to limit myself to just one sex. If I happen to fall in love with a guy, cool. Whatever, but that's not what I look for. Sexuality is fluid, so I allow it to be such.
Actually, I think queer is starting to become the umbrella term for the LGBT community, which would be nice and not nearly as much of a mouthful.
Nomming 1 year ago
Loved this topic!! I'm myself extremely androgynous! I like the look, haha but I've always been this way :p even before I figured myself out lol
hihitlw 1 year ago
Mary i'm totally with you, sometimes i wanna wear i dress and wear my hair down and sometimes i wanna wear my hair back in a messie bun in a tank and basketball shorts, why must ppl freak out whenever i'm wearing a dress, its annoying and kind of uncomfortable and makes me not wanna venure out and where dresses ever, but i do it cuz i feel like and thats the only reason i have to give them.
SoNluver511 1 year ago 2
you guys are hotter than Tegan and Sara :P Just sayin'.
I think it's also because androgyny is more widely accepted nowadays so many people who like to be the 'tweenies' or feel like the 'in-betweens' come out as that.
TripnSlide 1 year ago 3
I hope you are wrong about the butch-femme dynamic going by the wayside....I think we are seeing a resurgence in it in the older crowd to tell you the truth, and it IS still a very viable dynamic. I'm butch and proud, and I know many proud femmes. Love your videos, keep it up gals.
MainelyButch 1 year ago
I like the what you said about expression :)
FuckinSceneKid 1 year ago
Ok.. I loved you both before.. but now since you have basically captured me.. I love you more. :D Thanks girls. PS: your so cute together.
jrotcwolf09 1 year ago
tegan has ptosis. lol.
wakyyule143 1 year ago 24
If people call me dyke I wish I could tell them Im genderqueer but thats not a word in my language. I sometimes wonder if theres a need for a word for that exists only in the US, but then I realize Im not in the US either. And I do exist.
Dyke is really not something that applies to me if anything, call me faggot. I think thats something Id actually have an answer to. It would be easier to have to be defensive about liking boys than it is being defensive about liking girls.
M0A 1 year ago
I read about lesbianism in the 80's. In the UK, it seemed butch-femme relationships weren't common in lesbian communities interviewed (surprisingly). These women thought perhaps society focused on (& remembers) butch-femmes as they mimic heterosexual couples more.
Or, perhaps there were more butch-femmes as they mimic heterosexual relationships & they 'followed' these lines because maybe then society would accept lesbianism as a valid sexuality, relationship & lifestyle?
Interesting points!
Helsterify 1 year ago
I would give ANYTHING to be able to walk down the street in a skirt or heels and makeup with very feminine hair styles and such but being born female in a male body, and being unable to pass at present as female due to my facial hair and large masculine build (had to de-transition due to lack of finances and access to medical professionals) this is pretty much impossible unless I want to be seen as a weirdo by the general public. You girls might be seen as a little "off" being that you typically
jenniadriana 1 year ago
appear rather androgynous or more on the butch side if you went out "en femme", so to speak, but you wouldn't be seen as weirdos. Most people would think "hmm, that girl looks really cute in her dress and such with her really short hair and stuff, it's a little weird but still normal" albeit subconsciously, whereas someone like myself would be seen as a threat to the societal gender dichotomy and would generally be shunned, particularly in my state. God I would give anything to have been born
jenniadriana 1 year ago
genetically female just like all of you, and I would be absolutely proud and happy to be a gay genetic female but I HATE being trans!!!! I'm a girl, NOT a guy!!!! Why did this have to happen?!?!?! Anyway, I digress... sorry.
jenniadriana 1 year ago
tegan used to have ptosis but she had surgery to get it corrected xD
iamcoolalot 1 year ago
bahahahahahaha ptosis.. that video is goooold. i dont know why people can't tell them apart.. i can tell a mile away which is which.. they seam very different to me.. anywho. this was a good subject this week because i feel exactly as you two... im andro, i just wear what makes me feel comfortable and just because there has always been a feminine "ideal", it does not make me want to fit into that any more or less..
LLEBNAX 1 year ago
you guys are totally eating choco-nanas! you guys rock, i really dig your ideas about butch/ femme, androgyny and just having different days, you know? btw tegan is the one with ptosis.
crutches13 1 year ago
Straight girl can't stop watching....you fine ladies better quit being so awesome or I'm converting to the other side.
misskittyco 1 year ago 60
@misskittyco Come to our side! We have... frozen bananas!
GabbyXena100 1 year ago
I love the androgynous look. As I became more comfortable with my sexuality, I started changing the way I presented myself. I wanted to experiment and find a look I really liked. I even cut my hair super short, like pixie status. I've been told I'm androgynous. I don't have a super femme or super butch look. Sure, I have short hair, but I love doing my make up. And sometimes I do like to dress in cute, frilly shirts, and sometimes I don't. I love that women have more options now.
jimnecrikitlvr 1 year ago
" is sara the one with toasis?" -- thats Funny!
anotherloaner 1 year ago
I have gotten to the point where I have stopped trying to label myself. I just wear whatever I like, whether it be baggy, army fatigue pants and a t-shirt, tight jeans and a feminine blouse, or skirts. Interestingly enough, I feel the MOST comfortable in casual, androgynous, "unisex" clothes - just the standard t-shirts and jeans. I feel most like myself when my style has a balance of masculine and feminine qualities.
FM897 1 year ago 2
i can't believe nobody commented on the 'Wild Beast Predators on the Prowl' music you chose to compliment the devouring of our chocolate covered bananas :)
marybside 1 year ago 2
@marybside i had to go back and watch a second time because i was so focused on trying to figure out what you guys were eating lol, but yess that music is perfect it made me giggle. you guys make my day every single time i watch you together. cute as can be, you guys talk the way i think and its great.
casara27 1 year ago
@marybside are those called "banana babies" in the green box? or is that just east coast?????
wayfarer628 1 year ago
i really like androgyny and the androgynous look, but i get frustrated because (at least lately with the hipster andro fad) it doesn't really allow for bigger-bodied people. but i guess all fashion today is like that :/
yllwbird 1 year ago
oh my god. all of this week i've been debating whether or not to ask you guys to make a video on EXACTLY this topic. specifically, I was going to ask: what makes you dress the way you dress? and this video exactly answers that question! thanks so much guys! and i know you've gotten this compliment a million times but seriously, you guys are the epitome of the perfect lesbian couple :) i'd absolutely love it if one of you would respond to the message i sent you!
pomegranate333 1 year ago
@pomegranate333 Hmm... how 'bout, thanks so much for commenting and I'm glad that we were able to inadvertently answer your question :) You're rad.
cautiousplay 1 year ago
yay for angrogyny, yay for tegan and sara, and you guys are so stinkin' adorable.
honestlyiamsmiling 1 year ago
I hate when people assume I am either butch or femme by the way I dress. My partner calls me a tween since I can go either way depending on my mood for the day...lol.
darkangelwolfgirl 1 year ago
I find it refreshing that trends towards gay women's identity and self perception are expanding. It allows us to be more free with ourselves, how we feel about ourselves, and how we perceive our role in society. Sexuality is fluid.. the perception of this sexuality should follow suit. I'm in the camp of .. provided its not offensive, wear whatever it is that makes you feel good.
pumba7 1 year ago
When I see you two together I experience small bouts of jealousy haha.
SsoAuthenticC 1 year ago 2
really interesting take on androgyny! good video :)
SarahVeg 1 year ago
1. I like the move toward queer and androgyny. it allows more flexibility and less of a tendency for people to compromise their individuality to fit into gender roles.
2. Tegan is (now) the one with the longer hair + ptosis; Sara is the smaller, quieter and "femme"-ier one.
foxyfauxy 1 year ago
Oh Tegan....
HugoMadizon 1 year ago 2
tegan is the one with ptosis
ximepe88 1 year ago 2
You guys go on being who are in your lives and I will so respect you for it!
DAVETYIOP 1 year ago
I love frozen chocolate covered bananas. and Tegan is the one with ptosis.
criaturaderuby 1 year ago
"tosis" as in halitosis? but yeah, you two are a door bell always! ps. those choco covered nanners looked tasty tasty!
glasseyelashes 1 year ago
It's so true, I hate feeling like I have to either wear boyish clothes or girlish clothes. It's like..I wear what I want to wear. It shouldn't be an either/or equation.
sumkindawunnerful 1 year ago
You guys are amazing:]
jayjaydood87 1 year ago
i'm not a lesbian, but you guys are absolutely adorable!! so cute. love the hair :-)
riotgrrrrl1288 1 year ago
adurable but good vid
fun123a 1 year ago
@fun123a adorable
fun123a 1 year ago
why are you guys sooo cuteeeeeee. ahhh.
Susie4907 1 year ago