TUTORIAL - How To Avoid Work: Supermarket Edition

[herpwhileyouderp]

I'm working in a supermarket at the moment. This made me LOL so hard.

[Dunniebrasco]

Somehow i enjoyed this ;)

[WorthWatchingVv]

lol this is pretty funny.

[wopat44]

fake

[tjb032]

@wopat44 Case closed! You've done it again, Sherlock Holmes!

[WiiWonderMan]

@wopat44 Oh really! I think that's the point..

[DIABLOtheLEGEND]

fucking slackers, its funny thou....

[psyfertech]

haha i pulled the first day thing all the time on my first day

[meteorrocket]

The company that I worked for 2 years and almost 1 month ago has a policy of not taking back anyone who was fired. If you can't deal with EVERYONE, even people you hate, it makes looking for a job excessively difficult. I have learned this the hard way.

[sceincemagicsoul]

I love this guy!

[meteorrocket]

It has now been almost 1 year and 4 months since I have worked . I am still putting in applications, but all I ever get is runaround. However, I am only looking at jobs that do not require a lot of dealing with customers. I do not want a repeat performance of what got me terminated in the first place. I know they say that beggars can't be choosers, but I have learned a little about myself since I was last employed and I have to be realistic.

[TroySundt]

hahaha I worked at ShopKo for 2 years and my favorite thing was to walk around with the phone to my ear and then when i'd pass i customer i'd say something like "yah i think we have that hold on..." but once it kinda backfired, the phone i had to my ear rang as i passed by a manager... then during the remodel they switched to corded phones :(

[blocknetwork]

i work in an big store too and these are really the golden rules :D

[SonicTheHedgeTrimmer]

i'd like to attempt to put this into action in working in a small pizza shop. any suggestions?

[meteorrocket]

I can tell you from personal experience that if you don't treat the customers right, you will get fired. Although I think that this is an excellent video, I was dissing customers before I even knew what the internet was. Therefore, the video didn't affect my work behavior one way or another. This video is all in good fun and is not to be taken seriously.

[Ephraim2008]

derek is an aweful actor...

[meteorrocket]

Derek is a good actor as is everyone on this video.

[mychoix]

so true

[jhicks1289]

Do you work at Krogers?

[Spada05]

Holy shit! That's fucking Derek!!!

[RowanandMartin]

I lost my job 5 months ago due to customer complaints. I should have asked for another department before being fired. I can reapply for the job 6 months after being fired. If I have another chance at this store, I will not take any position that requires much interaction with customers like the front end where I survived almost 11 years as a bagger. I told the manager that I would consider stocking, dairy, frozen foods, or maintenance. He seemed cool with it. Overall, I enjoyed working there.

[drazo99]

Very Funny Make More

[wolfwoodxxx]

So can I walk around the store wearing a nametag that says ryan? then when they go to report me to my manager they report you to yourself? (because YOU are my manager =P )

[Hiramthedude]

are you sure it works in reality ?

[SpecialKyo]

This isn`t remotely funny nor is it clever.

Sucky video altogether, rather boring.

[SpecialKyo]

Ignore that comment, my cousin posted it, Sorry bout that guys, like your work x3

[TeddyandEmma]

My "Don't let the grammar get to you" comment is addressed to tjb032-Ryan.

[XOXB3CKYBOOPXOX]

Teddyandemma. You have no taste in videos. everybody disagree;s with you. your a sick twisted twat who needs to be hung. GET A LIFE YOU BITCH ! oh and people do you want to know how sick she is? she sed that she wants to torture a kitten. she would either shoot it. stab it or cut its mouth and body open. So just bare that in mind. YOU EVIL BITCH

[aplha183]

that was absoultely craptastic

[tjb032]

"craptastic" -- This isn't third grade. Start using more intelligent grammar.

[TeddyandEmma]

Don't let the grammar get to you. "Craptastic" is probably this person's way of saying that he/she didn't like your video. Grammar on a lot of the internet is much worse than "craptastic". This word might creep its way into society's way of talking over time and wind up in the dictionary in the future. Also, don't get upset over people who refer to Kroger as Krogers. Half the people I know do that. You must be an English major in college. A good job for you might be as an English teacher.

[RowanandMartin]

Third grade is an improvement over how people in the real world talk and write. People care more about what you say and how you say it than they do about grammar. However, if kids in school talked or wrote the way many adults do, they would flunk out of school or at least be put on academic probation, academic warning, or something like that. This looks like a double standard to me. Kids get the idea that they're held to a higher standard than adults. They resent it, and I don't blame them.

[DIABLOtheLEGEND]

@tjb032 start using more intelligent work methods, or your ass is geting sacked!

[TeddyandEmma]

chariot05, this guy is NOT an amateur. If you think that, you don't know good acting or grocery store work from a hole in the ground. He is an excellent actor who might get some calls from Hollywood. You should watch his other videos. As for the get out of work thing, he's just playing around. He's not really a bad worker or he would get fired. Half of youtube videos are someone having fun like that.

[XOXB3CKYBOOPXOX]

Oh , and if you want proof on how SICK AND TWISTED TEDDYANDEMMA is search Cat flips out at the vet - the first vid.

[chariot05]

i work at a grocery store

this guy is an amature

[thesmallbadwolf]

I am so glad I no longer work in retail of any sort.

[PANGLIN1964]

The best thing to do if you work in a grocery store is to work in a department that requires as little contact with the customer as possible unless you are a real people person and have the patience of Job. Otherwise, you are better off with something such as stocking, dairy, frozen foods, or maintenance-cleaning bathrooms, trash, sweeping, mopping, etc...which are jobs which require some, but not as much, dealing with customers as working the front end or being a manager or supervisor.

[thesmallbadwolf]

very informative... lol

[kennyro2008]

Dumb. Did you really think this was funny when you posted it. Funny if I was 15 and bagging groceries.

[PANGLIN1964]

Come on, where's your sense of humor? Don't you realize that Ryan was just trying to have a little fun while making the video? Few people in the real world can pull stuff like that without getting nailed sooner or later regardless of whether or not they're in a union. If you don't realize that, then I question who the dumb person here really is.

[tjb032]

Thank You! That was the most intelligent comment. I'm glad someone else can see what we do. Just a good laugh.

[marcobrooo]

amazing..i work at a grocery store,,im gona try this..thx man LOL

[tjb032]

You're welcome. lol.

[emsy2007]

this is funny im not actually oldenough to work yet so i dont know why im watchin this but it was still really funny and might help me out in the future lol

gr8 job on the video:P

[GJW90]

I bet you parents enjoy watching your funny videos

[mdelcamp1]

Anyone ever heard about the Wally World "Five Hour Rule"? They will fire you if you don't follow it. I worked 7 minutes over five hours after my Epping NH SuperCenter store closed. Wally World has a stack of blank time adjustment slips a foot high, but the Store Manager & District HR refused to adjust my time. Yeah, take Lunch all day and all night. F*** 'em!

[bostonbrawla]

We work night crew and play 45s for at least 4 hours a night.

[thesmallbadwolf]

what is 45s?

[bostonbrawla]

It's a card game we play up in northeastern MA. It's also played in Quebec.

[bostonbrawla]

Why is everyone putting negatives on all the comments that state that we slack off all day and night?

[PANGLIN1964]

Your video is great, man. I work in a grocery store and I usually avoid eye contact with customers. I love your "it's on the next truck" line as well as your wearing the wrong name on your nametag. When customers ask me where stuff is, I tell them that I don't know. When they ask for paper bags or carryout service, I make a face at them unless it's somebody I know. I give them what they ask for, however. I just don't make it easy for them. In my store, unfortunately, managers go everywhere.

[Tobes500]

And when I treated like that there is always a call over the intercom saying clean up on isle 3.I found that spilling cooking oil is best since it is hardest to clean up. Although I found it a bit harder to spill with the plastic bottles but mayo and salad dressings come in a good second choice since the bottles break easy and they are a mess as well. Think about that next spill you have to clean on isle 3 or 4.

[tjb032]

we just let the lower paid clerks with no seniority clean it up. it all works out. :)

[Tobes500]

It does and as long as they are busy doing something, you have to cover for them. So it all works out you end up having to do more somewhere down the line......

[tjb032]

actually, floor maintenance and stocking are two different departments. so we just end up watching them clean it up.

[Tobes500]

And you say "floor maintenance" Dop you work the midnite to 6 am shift? Thats when floor maintenance is done.Let me break it down and maybe you will undersatnd how it effects you in the end.Every time I run across a "punk ass" like you and break a jar of this or that it affects that raise you dont get, get it? It all works out.....

[tjb032]

actually, floor maintenance occurs all through-out the day. not just over night. they're there to clean up spills, dirt, etc. we're in a union so our raises come to us regardless. so keep breaking all the jars you want. we actually get store credit for damaged items. :) :) :) :) it all works out...just like YOU said. :) :) :)

[Tobes500]

Oh well thats the problem with the workforce today, dipshits like you and the unions who protect lazy ass's like you.

Union stores, Northern Ky, Cincy area.I bet I can probably figure out just which store it is you work and forward this to the right people and next time that union contract is renewed oh well think about it.....

[Tobes500]

But hey I am sure your mommy and daddy are proud.I bet they enjoy the time your at work and not hanging out in their basement at your age.

[tjb032]

You're exactly right. :) :)

[bostonbrawla]

I usually grab a newspaper or magazine and take a 30 minute dump.

[tjb032]

lol. i've known people who've done that.

[Tobes500]

Dude,

I will foward this to my buddy @Krogers. He will forward it to the right people. Do you think the union will be there for you?

You know showing how you dont do your work and pass it on to others?Im sure your fellow union members will stand behind you dont you?

[tjb032]

First of all. It's KROGER. There's no "s". Second. We don't work for that company. Send away.

[PANGLIN1964]

I've been at my store for almost 11 years-if you can believe that- and, unfortunately, that doesn't get me out of cleaning up spills that easily. Besides, cleaning up salad dressing, mayo, cooking oil, etc...might not be such a great idea as cleaning it up would just be more work.

[JTAArox]

hey guys its tiffany!(ryans little sis!) you guys rock!!!! this is my fav video u have ever made!!!!

[NIKALL0]

mera net khassi hai bhendchood fariya network walon ki maa ki choot maron randi kay bachay

[karliezmarie]

sounds like me at work. I guess I'm a genius too.

But yeah, avoiding eye contact is crucial. I do the same thing with the "truck" thing, because I don't feel like searching the stock room haha

[HedgeTV]

Yay, thanks! I'll never work again!

[calerenteuber]

haha nice work guys, i used to work at a supermarket and use that whole "yeah we dont have it in stock now but it should be in on tomorrows load" excuse lol

[CcTheMonkey]

Lmao...good work. Love the msuic in the back ground, and the huge check marks. I'm favoriting this one!

[brenpatandjoe]

good job boys, i owe you a meatloaf!

♥ mrs. mchugh

[wtywat15]

It's exactly what Spicoli said after the bank robber was disarmed. "All right, Hamilton (replace w/Ryan and Fetters)! Awesome, totally awesome!" 5/5 easy--best one this side of Chappelle's "Popcopy" video.

[RufioJJ]

yah this was a little slow. Its was ok.

[madamkitty]

XD That's great. It's on the next truck!

And the Napoleon Dynamite moosic wins.

[AnnieNM06]

this vid is great, please make more. thx

[123quilts]

visit my channel and check out my quilt video also my website becbo. com for bargello quilt patterns and designs

[sneakerset]

One of the best videos I've seen today(I saw the worst)Love that supermarket music!You both get an A+++.Great script,excellent composition,and good camera work.Ryan,be prepared for some job offers from the Screen Extras Guild.WELL DONE to both of you!

[caymanparalegal]

That was great, Ryan! I'd love to see more of these....

[supremeilluminator]

nice video man.. i remember when i was working at a supermarket i mostly just walked around to places where there is no customers or told a friend to come by and be hanging with him and if manager came then he was a customer so i got no complaints..

[CanadianFighterPilot]

Thats fucking hilarious, I use the "It's on the next truck" almost everyday.. Or tell them it's discontinued.

[bostonbrawla]

The old "it's discontinued" line! I love it. My favorite one is I'll check in the back and I just go out back and talk to someone or take a piss then tell them it will be in tomorrow or next week.

[tjb032]

Lol. Yeah, pretending to check an item in the back and talking to someone is the best.

[TerrasAngelsDemon]

That was funny. Need to be reminded to do that if I get a job at a local supermarket.