The Chronicles of Chris-chan: Christian Rages Against the Internet

[HLecterPHD]

Captains log. lolol

Go easy on the guy.

[differentdoorknobs]

The weird thing is, he seems almost frightened by the things HE himself is saying. Watch him after the particularly loud/threatening statements.

[Majorasword64]

He thought that clyde would actually come so he hid and shat himself :3

[tokusatsunerd]

2:07 HNNNNNNNNGH!!

[mrfalafl]

how is it he still doesn't realize Clyde Cash isn't real? how hard is it to use Google for him?

[69Poonhunter]

@mrfalafl Hes autistic.

[mrfalafl]

@69Poonhunter millions of autistic people around the world have the mental capacity to use Google to find information about someone else, when they want to.

[69Poonhunter]

@mrfalafl Hes a grown man that wears a sonichu medallion. You think hes that smart?

[mrfalafl]

@69Poonhunter Is that what I said? I said millions of OTHER autistic people are smart enough to use Google. So, his autism can't be the problem.

So no, I don't think he's smart. Neither are you.

[69Poonhunter]

@mrfalafl Awww, boohooo. Autistics are retards.

[Anonymous58815]

@69Poonhunter Autism covers a spectrum of disorders that vary in degree of functioning. Many people with high-functioning autism/Asperger's are able to adjust to society relatively well. Chris-chan, on the other hand...

[69Poonhunter]

@Anonymous58815 I know im just trying to annoy the guy below us,hes like 12 years old.

[xraygegz5]

@Anonymous58815 Chris Chan is a victim of poorly educated parents who refused to acknowledge his diagnosis, had they acknowledged his diagnosis they would have enabled him to get the help that would have allowed him to manage his condition and lead a fulfilling productive life. Unfortunately they didn't and this is the result..

[Anonymous58815]

@xraygegz5 Precisely.

[theblitz8]

oh he is mad!!!

[YamishiX]

2:06 This is officially where Chris becomes a super villain.

NNNNNNNNGGGGGGGH STRANGLE THAT CLYDE CASH

[benrockzTV]

@YamishiX MORE THUMBS UP. or i`ll make more accounts to thumb this up to the top

[CaptainPengu]

@YamishiX PIE HIS LIGHTS OUT

[Umbraluminous]

Is he trying to "force choke" through the internet or something?

[porkwilliam]

"I'll ster-angle that Clyde Cash..."

[JacobTefft]

1:54

"Ceasing of the cocks."

[xbm]

The first half of those video literally makes no sense

[Malkmusianful]

1:39 - DO WHAT HE SAYS

DO WHAT HE SAYS

[Dorminay42]

2:23 Anyone notice a cut? I'm guessing he was interrupted by DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS

[Dorminay42]

BACK THE FUCK OFF is the least annoying thing he's ever said. It's probably because it was too loud for the microphone to register the nasally quality.

[sikokilla1234]

I think it's funny when there's a funny comment that's been top voted then somebody a comment saying the same thing and it's not funny anymore

[ShrubberySalesman]

NRRRRRRRRRGH I'LL STRANGLE THAT CLIVE CAT!

[Antharothevalorouss]

Maaaaaaaaajor update

[FionaatGuy]

BY GOD, IF I HAD HANDS, I WOULD STRANGLE THE LIFE OUT OF YOU.

[drogothlord]

EEEEEEENNNNNNNNGH! I'LL STRANGLE THAT CLYDE CASH!

[TheBlackYousa]

I could totally pictures Chrischan as some saturday morning cartoon villain with Meowth's voice

"OY'LL STRANGLE DAT CLOYDE CASH IF IT'S DA LAST TING I DO!" as he picks his robot of week

"COISE YOU CASH, I'LL GET YOU NEXT TOIME!" as his robot failed and he flies away in his hover copter.

Would be epic lulz.

[CKO92]

In the unlikely event the police do get involved in this situation, it will probably be to arrest CWC as a stalker.

[SinDawg030]

STRANGLE THAT CLAWED CAT!!!

[mannysfriends]

what is he going to do throw cupcakes at me. he is also having angergasm

[ComradeGraty]

he'll break you dead

[ClempFilms]

NNNNNNNNGGGRRGGHHHH STRANGLE THAT CLYDE CAT!

[Simpsonsfan1011]

I miss this chris

[donuthead551]

@Simpsonsfan1011 i know, the tomgirl chris doesn't seem to be producing as much lulz as i expected

[NotTooWellKnown]

@donuthead551

tomgirl Chris is some of the most sane we've seen him... as impossible as that sounds

[donuthead551]

@NotTooWellKnown True, at least he's being TRUE AND HONEST about his homosexuality.

[NotTooWellKnown]

@donuthead551

A good poke in the ass will do wonders for his mental health

[donuthead551]

@NotTooWellKnown and if not he'll likely commit suicide, so its a win win

[grandmasterreggaex]

@NotTooWellKnown Is that what worked for you?

[NotTooWellKnown]

@grandmasterreggaex

*kneeslap*

[TheLastArchdemon]

um, handwriting cant implicate someone, i mean the police arent going to go to every house checking handwriting. idiot

[TehLeek]

Back the fuck off, have a good day.

[Ben1987X]

i love how he does the strangle thing I mean thats so hilarious absurd...

[ANT6440]

romantic life? what romantic life? in fact, WHAT LIFE!?

[EndGameGG]

"Information about my girlfriend"

"Gal-pal"

"I swear to God, comic will cease"

"Handwritten handwriting"

"I will go to the pohleese"

"I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL GO TO THE POHLEESE"

"I WILL GO WITH MY GAL PALS AND MAH FAMILEE AND MAH GIRLFRIEND"

"You do not want to get on my bad side again! AGAIN! NNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEENEEEEEEEEEE­RRRRR"

[hardkoregamer999]

even when hes angry i cant take him seriously i dont think anyone can LOL

[SNESosT]

This is fucking scary man, this is guy is fucked up

[Armystuntman]

"I will TIE your lights out!"

His voice would be good to be used as a cartoon character in the old Disney cartoons.

He'd take place of Yosemite Sam any day. Except Sam's cooler.

Meh.

[DjMaidenV]

I WILL PAWNCH HIS LIGHTS OUT

[MrAbawmidabull]

Clyde Cash, whoever you are, I fucking love you

[angrybull]

At 2:08, he shits himself. 

[99Lundinator99]

@angrybull yeah, and at 0:50 too

[Zeldarulah]

@angrybull At :51 he starts to.

[Razragon9000]

"and we have hand-written..and we have hand-written......... hand writing from Clyde Cash"

[AMIIZix]

BEST INTERNET DRAMA EVER

CAUSE ITS REAL

U CANT ACT THIS STUPIDITY LOLLLLLLLLLL

[BootyFister]

SOME PEOPLE ARE HILARIOUS WHEN THEY'RE ANGRY. CHRIS IS DEFINITELY ONE OF THEM.

[hardkoregamer999]

OH NOES THE CYBER POLICE!!!!! 

[XxPromisesBrokenxX]

Hand written handwriting. Classy.

[RandomPerson616]

What Chris-Chan doesn't seem to realize:

Writing insulting letters to someone is not illegal.

Sending someone a death threat is.

[ApacheMan2K]

You know, there ought to be a psychopath in a future Dead Rising game fashioned after this guy. Well, there is one psychopath in Dead Rising 2 at the wedding chapel who comes awfully close.

[Majorasword64]

@ApacheMan2K Now that I think about it yeah that psychopath in DR 2 is ALLOT like this guy.

[Popanator2010]

Typical asspie retard went poopie in his pants!

[Vertigo688]

Wait, girlfriend? What girlfriend? I see no girlf--

Oh, there she is, attached to his wrist.

[JulianusFlavius1]

BAWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

[kaiserscott]

Lol. This guy has hand movements that rival Hitler's.

[444Tazer]

Yes Chris, threaten the trolls. This is a good plan.

[Ericthehammer76]

suprised he hadnt got the funny farm called upon him yet...

[nucleardeath07]

0:37

"That ca-any any thing to intrude in my life, to make me feel, to-uh in my life, and in my family"

*Shits pants*

[sekushiiAri]

@nucleardeath07 ahahahah!!

it seriously looks like he's shitting himself in every rage video.

[jamiecranton]

Typed letter ? oh chris chan don't act like you can read.

[ZealSeraph]

Wouldn't seizing the comic actually be more like a reward, rather than punishment?

Also, this guy is hilarious when he throws a tantrum. :D

[TAXEXEMPTION]

@909After7 i would sell tickets.

[TheYoungTopGun]

LOL at 2:08

It sounds like he's saying Clark Kent lol

[helloredpanda]

loooooooooooooooooool

[TreborsWorld]

Ha you got punk'd

[Kmaster02]

You know that moment when you sit down and accidentally crush one of you bollocks, it really fucking hurts, i just did that, I'm in agony, oh and this guys retarded.

[mrhenryleopard]

Handwriting is handwritten? Thanks for that lesson Christian.

[deschain1989]

0:50 looks like someone needs his diapers changed!

[TonyBMan]

I STROKE MY COCK TO YOUR CRIES OF REBELLION CHRIS!!!!!!

P.S. Kacey just blew me, shit was so cash

[TonyBMan]

shit was so CLYDE CASH

[sexhaie]

"BACK THE FUCK OFF OR ILL KILL YOU! ILL STRANGLE YOU TILL YOU RUN OUT OF OXYGEN!!! YOULL BE DEAD!!!!....... peace out."

......

[TheChristisgreat]

God i cant stand his high pitched voice. youd think he injects estrogen up his ass

[FFS1NICO]

@TheChristisgreat that would be the least creepy thing he puts in there anyway...

[Shavarnarak]

NNNNNNGH STRANGLE THAT CLYCAT!

[leoTARDmrHecka]

"Leaked to a trusted indivijo"

[leeham991]

When he says "Back the fuck off!" he sounds quite normal.

[Wayavas1337]

You people making fun of a kid with asperger are pathetic, its like taking candy from a child.

Losers.

[DefendOurHome]

@Wayavas1337

Not aspergers, bro. I have a brother with Aspergers, this guy is high functioning autisitic. I'd feel bad if he wasn't such a creep.

[TonyBMan]

@DefendOurHome i think i like low functioning autistics better, if this is the high end

[BoukenCrimson]

@Wayavas1337  You have A LOT to learn about Chris...

[Wayavas1337]

@BoukenCrimson No i know everything about him , i know how he harrasses girls and how he drinks his own cum, this person needs medical attention, all the trolling youre giving him wont help but ust make him commit suicide.....OR WORSE, STRANGLE THAT CLYDE CASH

[BoukenCrimson]

@Wayavas1337 I agree with you 100%, he does need medical attention. Honestly, he needs to be institutionalized, that's just my personal opinion. However, as long as the videos of him are on the internet, the trolling will still go on.

[TonyBMan]

@Wayavas1337 ok fag, or is this u chris? tryin to troll the trolls?

[Wayavas1337]

@TonyBMan I am just pointing out some facts.

[BraceForFail]

i can just imagine him trying to file a police report against a man named "clyde cash"

[HippieBob]

Ohsnap, he's got a mirror's edge bag.

[Athils]

*WHEEEEZE* "Strangle that Clyde Cash!"

[Terrane21]

Chris-Chan, fails at Anger and threatening people. Sounds like he's taking a dumped in his crappy diapers...again.

[RavKun]

Never did the reply "lol" feel more appropriate.

[angrybull]

At 2:07 he shits his pants.

[sexhaie]

lol at:

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRR­RRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!

"LEAVE ME AND MY FRIENDS ALONE!"

chris, what friends?

[sexhaie]

"ILL SEND IN THE TAP-DANCERS ILL SEND IN POLICE ILL SEND EVRYTHING IN MY POWER!!!"

[ZyxthePest]

BACK THE FUCK OFF

...have a good day.

[KrazyKacophony]

Why do you wanna strangle that Clyde Cat? :(

[Worthog117]

he says he has friends....

What friends?

[didjargo]

@Worthog117 Sonichu and Rosechu, obviously.

[bobtheawesome727]

go to his house and steal all his personal documents and tell me about them! We must end those comics!

[BigRickDouglas1]

it sounds like he's really, seriously constipated.

[shadupp]

BACK THE FAWK AWF! URRRGRGGGGGNNNNNNGHHHH, STRANGLE DAT CLYDE CASH!

[k0vert]

"a typed letter ...has his handwriting" holy shit Clyde Cash is a sock account of Conky from Pee-Wee's playhouse

[blackriver481]

I don't think he's a big fan of that Clyde Cash character.

[CMThrasher]

OH SHIT! He has handwritten handwriting! Not the stupid ass typed handwriting shit.

[glenbeckfan]

Lmao. What a stupid fucker

[crimsoneternity]

Nyeahhh, wise guy huh?? 2:07

[Doodlez98]

Pedo bear is getting angry! D:

[jice12]

PONCH HIS LIGHTES OUT!!!

[TAXEXEMPTION]

@EtownMurderJunkie just search it on youtube.

[EtownMurderJunkie]

has anyone ever seen this comic he talks about in every fuckin video?

[Fr0st1989]

@EtownMurderJunkie it's like a poorly drawn furry porn series

[trsdos]

I dunno chris "back the fuck off" just doesnt feel as threatening when compared to your usual wooky growl.

[Hawkds21]

Looks like he really wants to strangle that Clyde Cash.

[Wayavas1337]

This man is either retarded or a genius.

[blizzardregulus]

Does Chris honestly think his comics are sufficient leverage against the cumulative bile of the internet?

[DopeIndustries]

1:38 Shit just got real

[bokuzenkosugi]

BACK THE FUCK OFF!

oh shit

[videogamenostalgia]

In Soviet Russia, Chris-Chan is the coolest human alive...

[TheDisturbedOne752]

HAND OF RAEG ACTIVATE!

[doyouwash1]

Shat his pants at 0:51

[Psquit]

hey a free tip fat man, stay away from the internet.

[SakuyaTheAbsol]

'I SWEAR TO GOD!'

Thats not very nice.

WRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRY

[TAXEXEMPTION]

girlfriend? ....is this the matrix?

[AndehX]

funny how he stutters like crazy, but when hes raging, he can suddenly talk properly!

[MaMudkipzIsTrollin]

RRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGG­GGGGGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

[boitahaki]

AWESOME

[kittysune1]

In my life.. to make me feel.. in my life and within my family mmmmmmmmmmmm I swear to God the comic will cease. LOL that was so funny! Who cares if it ceases you'll be giving everyone relief.

[Ishykawa]

Who is Clyde Cash, is he really that guy with spiky hair?

[buggerm4n]

Oh Clyde Cash, you saucy devil!

[TheCyclomethicone]

A HANDWRITTEN HANDWRITING! OMG! CALL THE GOVERNMENT! CALL CNN!

[anthmoo]

shit was so clyde cash

[EnGlave]

He shown he was actually capable of sounding threatening there for a moment when he yelled ''back the fuck off!'' but then he just became the chris we all know again

[SuperMariotheKing100]

By friends you mean Trolls and imaginary characters right Chris?

[CelticMudkip]

2:10 Chris Chan has evolved into a super human

but then becomes an idiot again.

Chris Chan was actually cool for 2 seconds.

[xXSteefJanXx]

:')

[SirCashbox]

He had difficulty bricking a very fragile ps3 to death. I doubt he's ready to take down a troll.

[MusicAndZombies]

lol'd hard

[Dziuravy]

a WTF warrior lvl 10.

[909After]

Just imagine hearing this "live" from a floor below

[ecuasxaz]

@909After You mean above. Chris isa moldy-basement dweler.

[porygonlover322]

"I will PIE his lights out!"

I'm pretty sure only The Joker can do that effectively, Chris.

[BillyCauseyjr]

I love the end: "back the fuck off! now have a good day."

[CyberMcRock]

Pooed

[grantasas]

BWhahahahahaha STRANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN­NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN­NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN­NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN­NNNNNNNNNNGLETHATCLYDECASH.

BWhahaha, Poor Chris. Trying to make it look like he's tough.

[Wyndrax]

The voice in 2:10 sounds like a cartoon villiain.

[Sagakirby]

A wild manchild appeared!

[Kamikitsune0]

I'm calling out his bluff

[FangedDragon01]

Whoa, I think this Chrissy means business.

[TheShadowyPhantom]

Don't swear Chris - that pisses God off, who will then smite the ever-loving hell out of you.

Actually, I don't think He could do much more to you . . .

[FoxyMamaRox]

Every time he says "Captain's Log", another Red Shirt is senselessly killed. :(

[halowarrior1000]

In soviet russia Writing write hand!

[Canny911]

ROFL!!! "I swear to god, the comic with CEASE!" OH NOEZ! Not your shitty, ripped off, stupid ass retarded comic! OMG CHRIS NO! HOW DARE YOU! HOW DAAAAAAARE YOOOOOOU! HOW CAN YOU BE SO CRUEL!

What a fucking faggot. Like anyone gives a shit if the comic ceases. He threatens this every time someone fucks with him and makes him look like an idiot. Does he ever do it? No, and if he did who cares? The lazy fuck never updates or works on it anyway.

[CKO92]

@Canny911 Personally, I suspect half of North America would declare a civic holiday if he cancelled Sonichu permanently.

[tuxedomoroboshi]

I don't get it. He's threatening to stop his comics if the trolls don't leave him alone, but... how is that supposed to discourage the trolls, exactly? Granted, we all know he doesn't have any real fans, but he thinks he does, and by stopping his comics, he'd be punishing his fans that didn't do anything, and the trolls win. So, uh... ya, wtf kind of logic is Chris-chan working off of?

[mrslash11]

HAHA "Have a good day"

[CKO92]

"You don't want to get on my bad side again..."

Getting on Chris-Chan's bad side doesn't seem all that hard to do. In fact, I doubt he has a good side.

[gsfdahgsdfa]

Uh, and if i live in russia? i still can send you crap :D lol

[TheGPretender]

lol wat friends