Is There Life After Cheating? Can You Survive An Affair?

[Banaany]

i'm kinda hurt by this vid. of course cheating can come out of relationship problems, but this is not always the case. My boyfriend had multiple internetaffairs and kissed and danced intimately with other girl while going out. I thought I was part of the problem and tried to fix it through communication. din't work.Turns out it was all his pleasure hunting nature and his adhd! And he was raised that he could get away with anything. Cheating is not always neccesarily the fault of both partners!!

[killerkuush]

thank u

[sleepingm00dy]

my ex cheated on me...and honestly..our relationship was perfect. we were together all the time. he was so affectionate and happy and wanted me all the time. then the night we got back from our amazing holiday in the summer, he got with his best mate. i couldnt find a reason in why he cheated..i really couldnt. i still cant now. which is why im finding it realy hard to move on and let go.

[zxcvbnmjhgfdsa1]

@sleepingm00dy maybe it was an accident, maybe he got drunk or go too far in to get out

[sleepingm00dy]

@zxcvbnmjhgfdsa1 for god sake i wish my sis wouldent use my youtube!

[KINGofkings49er]

why would u date some1 if you going to cheat on them??? Talk to your partner before you cheat.....that what I think anyway

[lilbigmike009]

my gf cheated on me 3 times and im still going out with her but the only problem is gaining trust back but it does suck and i love her and stay with her cuz we are at 8 months but it sux

[Matthew988]

Cheated on 3x after 8 months and you stay with her? Idiot.

[Chirios1]

No, a relationship can't survive an affair. If someone cheats on you and you take them back you are not "giving the relationship a chance". You are a punk a** b*tch, plain and simple.

[zxcvbnmjhgfdsa1]

@Chirios1 too harsh you cant say that in every case. What if the person got drunk or has extreme stress like say bill clinton

[icatchcheaters2008]

cheating is wrong.

Fix it or leave the relatoinship.

[reminiscence78]

if he betrayed me because I do something wrong, then what was my problem... I did nothing but only love him which his ex-es never did...

[ivanyoulube]

the reason men forgive more is because women cant and dont reason LOLz

[leemajaz]

the affair may be a symptom but unlike most symptoms, an affair doesn't force itself on you. nobody held a gun to the person's head for them to have an affair. stop finding blame after the affair and start talking before the affair.

[acase22003]

when u go out the devil comes in

[acase22003]

Then we got back together only after he was payin for me to go to college I kicked him out. His brother took him to stay a night with him and his wife's roommate who had raped him. He marry's her so I beat her and made him go with me or he would never see his child again.

We then had another child still cheatin on him then after givin him another child I matured. We forgive each other and move foward instead of movin backwards.

[acase22003]

If their goin to cheat thier probly not goin 2 want u 2 fix it. After I had my 1st child. I was with someone and he worked 3 jobs while the I had all my ex's come over even go out with some highschool friends who were bisexual to movies exc.. Everybody told me what 2 do. And I never asked my partner what 2 do. If he was 2 tired I'd beat him up and rape him. Then I told my friends of how endowed he was and she rapes him as well. But he married her to get back at me.

[herewatchingutube]

I have to fully disagree w/ her statement 'u dont go 2 ur family or friends, u stick 2 the partner' If there is a problem in ur r'ship u need ur family/friends there. If ur trying 2 spend time 2 try to fix what is wrong, (which is useless cuz theres no point in forgiving a cheater) then its just going to escalate into something no1 wants to cross into. And just because ur spouse/partner cheated doesnt mean u did anything wrong, u arent always part of the problem!!

[mandylaw24]

I have to disagree with something here. Sometimes, the victim is the victim. I never asked to be cheated on or lied to. And not "putting out" is not a reason to cheat nor should it be looked at as a fault. When someone cheats on you, it's not your fault. It's theirs; because they didn't communicate to you about what they needed or felt and because they didn't trust your relationship enough to be faithful. Honestly, this video gives the cheaters an easy way out of responsibiltiy. That's not cool.

[MicroKitty]

I don't feel that they are saying it's the person's fault they were cheated on. They are saying that there is usually a reason. Key word: "usually". Some men/women are just cheaters and that's their problem. But they're not speaking about those cases. They're speaking about people who act out of character for a REASON. At least that's what I took from it.

[Jayjen35]

fine'? No matter how much you love someone you can't read their mind. And you can work all you want to on yourself, take them blame for what's going wrong, and still if your partner will not talk to you what can you do?

And frankly, from what I've seen (no not from personal experience) some men, quite a few in fact (and I suppose women too, but not that I've seen) just feel that it is their right to cheat. That it is just what a man does. How can you not feel like a victim with that?

[Jayjen35]

Not really new thought is it. How many times in the past have we heard people tell women, "if you kept your man happy he wouldn't need anyone else" and of course men get the same response, "if you kept your woman satisfied she wouldn't be out there".

But here's the problem, how is the "victim" supposed to know that their partner isn't happy if their partner doesn't TELL them?

How many men and women have asked a partner over and over if there is something wrong only to be told 'everything's

[zorndyuke]

This is the reason why I don't have a girlfriend. I live in Berlin ( Maincity from Germany ) and here lives many "bitches". They just want fuck. They don't care when you get hurt. I'm very sensible, I could survive but it would hurt very much!

[heysarah41]

this is the worst advice i've ever heard.

there is no excuse for cheating

[mimi0816]

This is fucking bullshit the affair is the issue and the person that was cheated on is a victim.I've been in a relationship for 4 years and my bf the person I live with cheated on me.We had no problems.There were no signs that he was cheating.He's an attorney so whenever he went to court in queens county he hooked up with his whore.He had unprotected sex with a girl named MICHELLE that lives in far rockaway and gave me herpes.Now I ask how can anyone ever get over that?

[MicroKitty]

Hey I live in Far Rockaway! Michelle who? What's her last name! wow!

[arrn141516]

@mimi0816 im sorry to hear that and yeah the affair is the issue, but the question is why did it happen?? did it mean something, or it was a one night thing. can someone forget and affair? i probally say yes, but i would need prove of a loyal future, that it would not happen again.

[MacBooksToHandrail]

Is that drink sourpuss?

[DanAndJenn]

raspberry martini

[XXXXXXXZar]

Thank you. No, thank you. No no no, thank YOU. Oh man... All three of them are probably cheaters.

[natken125]

women feel comfortable in the victim role?!?!?!?!?

What is she on?

[ruin3r]

These people are ignorant. The person cheated on IS the victim, period. there is NO legitimate excuse to ever cheat on someone betraying their trust.. if you want to have sex with someone else BREAK OFF YOUR RELATIONSHIP first, don't play games with peoples minds.. cause one day you'll fuck with the wrong person's heart and BOOM you're dead.

[spiderturtle80]

this is stupid.

you are obviously democrats.

haha. this is why america is going to shit

[niktasor]

Hahah love the guys reaction when the older woman says "men are pigs"... I need a swag of this liquor.... hahahaha

[Tomahawk1999]

Dan and Jen,

Have some common sense and stop talking when the third person is talking. We cant hear shit when all three are talking and the third person has to raise his/her voice just to get through your chaotic chatter.

[MonkiMajyk]

this was on point.. thnx for this one. she said it right there there would be no affair if he/ she were happy in it.

[rhianna4damion]

omg cheating is fucked up its like shit stay with sum one or just break up dont even try even if u r sure u wont get caught

[ajbarnstormer]

im not a cheater im a lion!

[erickbiggs]

people take sex way to seriously...

[ajbarnstormer]

Of coarse there is life after cheating! just dont get caught

[leathoforganicplasti]

After seeing this i am confident on cheatting my girlfriend :))...like....they are right...SHE HAD IT COMMING :|

[kiploca88]

fuck that!!! if my man cheated on me he can go kiss my ass...i aint taking him back...thats bs...n if there was a problem then why not talk about it and try to resolve it instead of going an fucking someone else duh!!

[TallestCzar]

Some people cheat for the sake of they can't keep their dick/panties on. Its not always 'the other partner's fault'.

[vfyl86]

AGREED! haha

[LiambsDen]

Hi Dan & Jenn: Again, sex revives the inuterine pain/pleasure complex which boils to the surface of any relationship. We felt victimized in the womb as we struggled to survive our parents seeming disregard for out blood supply, so we naturally experience lusting after our neighbors spouse. Polygamy was gods answer, but the pain/pleasure complex has succeeded in suppressing that with a vengence,(I was raised a mormon)I love you both and am thanful for this forum you have created.

[COMPTROL]

does anybody know the opening song ?

[exoticaplaya]

que sintoma jejejeje el sintoma es peor que la enfermedad de un matrimonio monotono y el sintoma el-la amante

[phorse323]

jenn lets have an affair,then we'll see if you can survive an affair :)

[tanky24]

Don't agree with what she said. How can a partner own responsibility for another partner cheating if in reality the victim did nothing wrong. Some men are pricks, some women are sluts.

[nagzul]

Correct.

No matter how you're pleased.

If you think selfishly, then woe to you.

There's no real love.

It's all perverted these days.

In life love means more than who can make you happy, not whom you care about the most.

Some cases, the only reason you care about someone is because you seem them as an existing object that makes you happy, and you don't wnat to part with it.

[99minerkc]

If you didn't cheat in the first place you wouldn't be here, correct?

[xRoflCoptoRx]

The only time an affair is needed if the problem will not be talked about.

Lots of people just do the cheating part first, those people are stupid and deserve to get "dumped"

[luda265]

Can relationship survive affair?

Maybe... but it never be the same.

[flintstone9812]

Some cheat because they have a spouse that takes and takes without giving. ME, ME, ME....

Some cheat because a spouse neglects them.

Some cheat because they LIKE TO.

The divorce rate in America is artificially reported as high. There are numerous couples married for life but the ones who divorce are often repeat persons of divorce and may have three or four failed marriages. That runs up the percent but it is actually the same persons in repeat divorces.

[HKichen]

Mixed schools are good because guys keep the girls from turning against each other, much to my embarassment, it's true. Segregating between 2 main group, guys vs. girls. So mixed schools CAN have big benefits too.

[HKichen]

Yeah, girls can be big fat douchebags! And i'm a girl! They are ohhh soooo sensitive and easily hurt. And man are they cunning! Guys, they can be very scary and can backstab u. I tried my best to be as friendly as i could this year and they just took advantage of my kindness. To anyone that disagrees go into a girls' school first and feel the pain of loneliness before u reply.

[cursedvamp6]

So long story short, some people are just prone to infidelity. No matter what sacrafices, or attempts the other partner makes to fix the "situation".

[cursedvamp6]

I thought I had found "the one" everything was amazing for three months and kept on getting better until I left town one weekend and she decided to go out with a group of my friends (she knew them by name and nothing more) and have sex with one of them, and then dump me for him... Granted it was not marriage, I would love to see any one point out where I was at fault there. Despite getting in accident on that trip, and suffering several family crisis, I forgave her. And she did it again.

[ibmsony101]

I am sorry, but come on! They cheat-- they get kicked to the curb.

[luda265]

Well....she definitley wasnt "the one".

Dont look for a "fault", move on.

[wolfinside]

I think it serves therapist's well to tell expound that cheating is the fault of both people, after all their bread and butter is made counseling couples. But I believe that cheating is more about the cheater and their need for attention from the opposite sex to prop up their own self esteem issues. Unless the cheater admits they have a problem they will cheat again. And getting to blame their spouse seem to be the perfect justification for the cheater.

[noheartnoshame]

lolz, they keep on interrupting each other. I love their annoyed looks

[emoXpatrol]

Yeah, you wanna know what was wrong? My ex likes penis. THAT'S why he cheated on me a million times. Not because I did something wrong.

[edmondov]

Maybe you should find out about the person before having a serious relationship.

[Bigshot85]

did you date clay aiken?

[rosehipsforu]

I think the reason that divorce statistics are so high these days is because gender roles aren't defined. Maybe if we took care of our men, and treated them better they wouldnt want to cheat. what about putting 100% into a relationship and getting 100% in return. isnt that a crazy idea? heres another one.. before you lay down with him, get to know him. -what a concept.

[lavinder11]

.....

Your explanation assumes men are the only cheaters.

I think the fact that our society is very 'temporary' contributes to those numbers as well. You should be honest with whomever you're with. That helps a lot in the long run.

What people expect of relationships are 'out there.' Not every encounter is going to be bubbles on pink clouds. This 'made for each other' business is out of hand.

We should enjoy what we have instead of always searching for The One.

[mrhenky42]

I see it like this:

If someone in the relationship cheats then there is a BIG problem between them.

If someone cheats he doesn't love the other person. Therefore they aren't made for each other.

[ilovegarthie]

i agree they already made there choice.

[razzlovesdeanosaurus]

@mrhenky42 you can definitely love someone and still cheat. you are implying that if there are problems then the two people aren't in love? i've seen people suffer for a long time in relationships because they don't deal with their problems and so aren't intimate. intimacy is human nature and because one person may seek it elsewhere don't mean they don't love the person that they have chosen to be with. if they didn't love the person they wouldn't be with them.

[gossamerwindweb]

the problem is that most people don't want to take any kind of ownership and would rather be victims

[karry299]

I personally think that cheating deserves stoning to death. If you whores want to spread your legs for someone else - close the current relationship first, be at least decent enough to do this. But alas, i havent heard of a woman decent enough to do that.

[DanAndJenn]

Wow, somebody has some personal baggage around women. :-( If you ever hope to have a happy and successful relationship with a woman, you should seriously consider counseling / therapy to discover the roots of those dark feelings toward women. Good luck with that. And thanks for watching!

[ibmsony101]

Well he has a problem, disliking cheating women and all. After all, infidelity is now in and the media-entertainment-complex is justifying it. Divorce courts no longer punish the cheating wife while the innocent husband gets his ass thrown to the curb broke and she gets to move her lover in his house and with his kids. In most states he is in the hock for child support for kids that are not even his. The fact that American men are still marrying is astonishing.

[DanAndJenn]

To clarify this misconception that only women cheat: Women are no more likely to "cheat" than men, and in many cultures it is still today "societally accepted" for men to have mistresses.

Also, as explained in this video - where there is cheating, there are usually deep relationship problems that led to that situation being possible. It's hard for the ego to hear, but without accepting that fact there is really on way to move forward.

[Jayjen35]

I'm sorry but I have to agree with karry299 on one point. Why not just divorce your spouse? I can't figure out why people bother with affairs. You can't still love someone enough to want to be married to them if you can hurt them in so horrible a way. Hitting them would be more merciful.

Why not just leave? You'd be following you true feelings and likely be doing your spouse a very big favor by saving them a lot of time and grief.

[ibmsony101]

Because honor and moral courage are male only concepts, invented by men and for men. Women do not bother with that stuff- They have emotions to justify even the most unscrupulous of behaviors. Why rock the boot when both men in her life are fulfilling the roles she wants. Mr cuckold is the ATM on legs and her errand boy that she only have to bang in special occasions- Mr sexy is serving wads of orgasms and loads of endorphins.

[ibmsony101]

That is pro-ho talk there! Some researchers claim that cheating women almost never feel guilty and instead blame the innocent party. The nice homely men are ones most likely get cheated on. Women are much better at covering up affairs and men are less apt at discovering them. Watch the show cheaters, men always walk away from their lovers in shame- women stick with their lovers and join him in attacking the husband. It is fascinating.

[TheLegendaryElder]

@DanAndJenn i think that karry299 isn't too far off the track. personally men and women alike should be thrown in jail if they regret cheating and the ones who don't well. stoning would be too kind for them. and as for the ones who cannot stop. permentant lockdown alone on an island.

[halo2994]

actually i agree with you.

Keep in mind Cheating means different things in each relationship and cheating for me might be a normal Saturday night to you.

But when someone violates the trust of a relationship (where ever that line is drawn) i have no further use for them.

[ibmsony101]

What I question is why Americans still get married in great numbers? Marriage is completely out of touch with modern cultural and legal situation in America. Cheating is statistically the norm and divorce is the fate of over half the marriages with devastating economic and emotional repercussions.

[waterhot80]

I actually had an affair with Jenn, and I once saw Dann in a gaybar. The reason I was in there is because I saw him go in, but I wanted to check it was definatly him.

[mathias1211]

if my girlfriend cheated on me i would leave her in a hurry. Even though i love her if she cheats she dont love me and then i dont love her anymore

[ibmsony101]

Right on, but try telling that to the girly-men who will cry, blame themselves, take counseling and try work it out. All they do is in effect telling the slut what she already knows, he isnt a man and she can just walk over him and discard him when he outlives his use as her obedient cuckold.

[dannykim100]

true say

[nasahol]

Nice :)