Added: 4 years ago
From: headzup
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  • @iamanoob2010 i wouldn't be talking because who would name themselves noob. now thats a bitch slap BITCH!

  • @libboki u want to suk my dick faggott

  • tom the cult member cruise sucks, fuck mission impossible

  • Were he and Travolta ever lovers?

  • whatever dude

  • this is such a pardoy they even spoofed the music

  • It is a privilege to be a Scientologist? Since when did being scammed for tons of money to be taught about Xenu and aliens being destroyed in a volcano by hydrogen bombs became a privilege? It is more like a Scientologist is a title for those who will fall for most any money scam.

  • that laugh cracks me up XD !

  • i hope Tom starts acting stupid again soon. its a lot more fun to talk about what a goofball he is

  • Tom Cruis should do what he can do best, taking care of his dad's cum.

  • that laugh is great

  • Thats one scary little man.

  • so i kicked hims square inn the newts!!!!hahahahaha

  • I was in the mall and did that stress test thing you hold. When I pegged the machine out she(very hot woman) said, " what did you just think of"? and I lied, "oh I thought about work"( Actually I was thinking of her naked). She said my job was stressful, so I knew it was bullshit lol

  • Only a scientologist can truly understand and appreciate 'touch assist' tech.

  • that laugh is funny

  • What a Puppet!

  • SHOCKING

    projectcamelot dane tops.

  • What the fuck is an Sp?

  • Suppressive Person. Basically anyone who says anything bad about Scientology is an SP. And because of L Ron Hubbard's "Fair Game" policy, Scientologists can take any action to stop an SP, including criminal activity.

  • I want a shirt with : Sue me, I'm an SP!

  • An SP is a "Suppressive Person". Someone who has been deemed a threat to Scientology.

  • Supressive Person. This how scientologists call their enemies... or anyone sane.

  • @gangleri2007

    Sounds real childish to me. I mean, sounds like something a second grader would scream at a bully. "SUPPRESSIVE PERSON!!! I'M TELLING WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!"

  • he's lost the plot

  • The Orcs are there to help, 10,000 can help Tom clear a planet, & find a Vril ring of treasure finding & summon golems.

  • and to tracyterry, your full of shit little prick whos never touched a oz. of weed.

  • I like Tom really!

  • tracyterry, Tom must be attacked and exposed for what he is attempting to do in the name L. Ron Hubbard and Scientology. This is a evil cult hell bent on destroying those who do not lock-step with them. If Tom is a good human, I hope he finds this out before it's too late because I too, appreciate Toms achievements on screen. BUT! we must stop them at every point and at this point, Tom is the big banana!

  • Who really gives ashit about what tom cruise says...hes got money and looks so I guess we all have to listen to him sense he did do rain man, topgun, mission impossible, taps ect...bunch of sheeps.

  • that's so funny when the guy's voice on this video laughs.. HAHAHA!... but i love Tom and i wish everyone would stop dissing him. scientology sucks, but Tom is nice... and cute :) ... i use to hate "Vanilla Sky", but now it's one of my fave buzz-movies for when i drink and get high... it's good then (but not too good if you're totally sober)

  • Argh! People like you bug the shit out of me! You'd probably defend Hitler if you thought he was 'cute'. Tom Cruise is a self-satisfied prick, and to be honest has severe mental issues. If he stank of shit would you still like him? Stop being so fucking shallow traceyterry. Wake up!

  • generally, religious principles aren't inherently bad, just power-hungry fucks usually exploit them and contexts change. The more organisations use them and make principles dense, the harder itis to make sense. Like, most people agree, the moral code against murder is pretty reasonable, largely crosscultural and it makes sense, but other codes often need updating along with our socieites. Let people have spirituality they want i say, but they should be educated about it and not force acceptance

  • LOL Tom will wake up one day and find out the truth

  • Dream on. :P

  • That he is gay and an asshole lol

  • ALL religions hav flaws. So why call out one single one. Even atheism has its flaws. The only real answer we can all agree on is that we will find out when we die. if any1 took the time to research their own religion, 90% of people would be horrified at wat their religion caused. And most people dont hate scientology for their beliefs, they hate them because its the only religion where you MUST pay to believe what they do. Sure, christians collect money and so do many religions, but its not req

  • how does atheism have flaws? no religion, no belief structure dictated by other people - perfect! we don't need any religious bollocks any more

  • atheism's flaw is simple, the belief that there is no god watsovever. its not wrong, but no one can prove there is no god definately. thats why I am a nihilst. I believe there is no answer to why we are here. and everything that is considered, moral or immoral, good or bad, nice or mean, is completely false. It is only an illusion set upon us by mankind. thats what seperates nihilists from atheists, morality. but nihilists and atheists both believe there is no god, and to religious idealists...

  • ... we are insane. But to pragmatists, we are visionaries. Our beliefs require no heirarchy, no leaders, no gods, no kings. Just science, reasoning, logic, and man.

  • amen!

  • you're just a bunch of fun then aren't you lol.

  • People really need to get a sense of humor. It's just a video, don't take it so seriously. If you agree with it, then enjoy it. If you don't then go watch something else. We don't need to be preached to about religion.

  • Tom Cruise= A**hole.

  • Scientology: Makes Bernie Madoff look like Mother Theresa

  • hahahahahaha omg! when he was talking bout how he was the only one who could help out with a car accident i was like wow...this is a good spoof of it

  • What is "SP" or "PDSSP" ???

  • Google "SOK Kneeophytes" for a pants-wettingly funny parody of Scientology.

  • I punch him in the face and I drive the ambulance myself!

    I lol'd

  • Oh please guys, I dont know why I clicked on this, but honestly, shouldnt we be better employed..................leav­e it all alone, its just silly.

  • coo coo for coco puffs

  • lulzzz

  • No wonder that Nicole Kidman - a proper actor, unlike ex-hubby, Tom - gave this guy the elbow. He is a four-kind, 24-carat, fucked-up fruitcake, if ever there was one.

  • But one hell of an actor.

  • Well . . . . depends what you mean by "acting".

    He's managed to convince his fan-base that he's a "swell guy". That's pretty good acting! But, when you know the nutty and nasty company he keeps with his "Church", then you change your mind about him.

    If you mean he's a "proper" actor - forget it. He's not a convincing Nazi; and, when put alongside Dustin Hoffman in "Rainman", Hoffman made Cruise look like the stuffed-shirt, wooden-"movie star" that he is.

    Nicole's well-rid of him!

  • I have to agree. Hes not a great actor open your eyes, there are lots of greats out there and he is NOT one of them. Now that I have read some of his weird space views I will go out of my way to not watch anything from him.

    The guy is just a freak that should have to be supervised when having visitation with his kids. I wouldnt leave a freak alone with my kids.

    I Must run I hear space ships callinglmao

  • @TerrySleeper Cruise is a proper actor! He's retarded and nuts but he's a great actor...

  • "...he says no, I punch him in the face; and drive the ambulance myself".

    Ha ha ha ha ha!

  • ""...he says no, I punch him in the face; and drive the ambulance myself". Ha ha ha ha ha! "

    Because Scientology is the only one who knows how to drive an ambulance. LOL!

    Heterosexual Tom Cruise is so fucking insane.

  • They are the authorities on driving all kinds of emergency vehicles: if you hadn't been glib and done your research you'd know that.

  • They're the authorities on "getting people better" according to whom? I do not know. Themselves definitely.

    Getting "better" in the eyes of the Church of $cientology is becoming more and more willing to give up money to the "church" to further yourself along the "bridge to freedom" which probably lands you next to Tom Cruise in ambulance driving/med school.

  • No different than Chri$tianity. sorry

  • Wtf you saying sorry to me for?

    I hate Christianity too.

    Organized religions make me sick.

  • you dont have to pay $300000 to be a christian

  • Nor do you in Scientology. People who can give to, but the Christian Church is a multi-trillion dollar a year scam. Christians murder doctors with whom they don't agree, they cheat the government out of taxes, a Christian woman just abducted, raped, and murdered a pupil from her Sunday School class. Christians are sick fucks.

  • your pretty stupid. atheists and scientologists love to troll christians. Im taking it that your an atheist or a scientologist. Scientologists have the stupid made up fucking story of a religion ever. christians actually have a credible story.

  • "your pretty stupid." "Your"? Nice. I agree with you about the Scientologists. It is insanity. Where we disagree is I see nothing credible or less stupid about dead jew zombie lovers (christians) that story is 100% bullshit. Old bullshit yes, but bullshit none the less.

  • Oh, im sorry. I spelt a word wrong. I think that the biggest religion in the world is somewhere on the right track, and your atheist/scientologist cult is trying to dethrone us.

  • "atheist/scientologist" Can you be both? It's charming how you ignore the horrific crimes against humanity your kkkhristian cult has done, yet you cry about other religions. Remember - HITLER WAS CHRISTIAN.

  • OH WOW, one bad christian person. The KKK now has 2500 active members, about .0002% of all christians. Atheists are stupid trolls who love to think that all religions suck. Please shut the fuck up, let people believe what they want to believe, and leave.

  • Apparently god doesn't have spell check.

  • Also, I don't understand where your getting at. Your obviously christian since most of your faved vids are praising christianity.

  • Mario - most of my favs are Edward Current (the guy in my avatar) watch the videos and you will see he's actually trashing the Christians. I hate all religion, not just Jesus's fan club.

  • good. keep your opinions/beliefs to yourself, and stop trolling non atheists.

  • Why? If you are too stupid to realize Edward Current is making fun of your stupid fucking religion - that's your problem. Christians foist their fresh hot Christ DOG SHIT on to us, so you can sit there and turn the other cheek you stupid fuck. Thanks. Oh, FUCK JESUS HE IS A WORK OF FICTION, AND NOT A VERY BELEAVABLE ONE AT THAT.

  • Now do you understand your fucking dolt? I wonder how many dollars for which the church has bilked you. What does Wal-Mart pay for part time greeters? Oh I wish the Christians would re-consider the Children's Crusade. Cull out you Christian useless eaters before you completely wreck the country.

  • 84% of americans are christians. .8% are atheists. Im pretty sure you guys are the batshit insane cult, and you don't know what you are talking about. Your just trying to dethrone the biggest religion because your personal beliefs dont agree with ours.

  • Interesting. You follow the herd? Did your source on that number indicate which direction that number is going? All religion is worthless drek. You can trash Scientology with my blessing, but your religion is no better. It's just killed a LOT more people.

  • well said mario,they have to make up for their lack of numbers by dissing all religions which makes them feel better about their own beliefs.And to all the people claiming Christians force our religion on people lets take at the ratio on here of how many Christians are claiming you'll all go to hell and all those other outdated stereotypes vs the more obnoxious athiests blatently claiming we have no respect for those who differ from our beliefs whilst at the same time denouncing our beliefs.

  • im sorry you really think that christianty is that large. but lets compare the ratio of the people who "claim" to be christian against those who actually go to church. and "christiantiy" has so many demoniations its ridiculous to even classify them as one religion. oh btw, if u go up and ask a christian, ANY christian, about the history of their religion, they wont know it. why, cause all christians think their religion is flawless. take the time to actually study ur religion. then get bck to me

  • Moron, a wise man once said "In the valley of the blind a one eyed man is king" Christianity seems to be that valley. We all know there are more stupid people in the world than there are intelligent ones. So sorry Christians, sucks for you eh?

  • agreed.

  • Are you fucking kidding me you nimrod? Since when did popular appeal add anything to the correctness of any belief?

    In 1440 most people thought the earth was flat.

    You're so fucking stupid I can't even make fun of you.

  • Love it. World wide Anonymous is winning. The insane Scientology crooks have maybe some 40,000 remaining customers world wide and it's all thanks to the ARSCC and Anonymous. Absolutely love it. The mainstream media around the world is with Anonymous and they report that Anonymous is a beneficial force -- which pisses off the 4channers but who cares?  }:-}

  • I cant believe I bought self help or some bullcrap about 4 years ago. Stupid stress test.

  • "I cant believe I bought self help or some bullcrap about 4 years ago. Stupid stress test"

    Lots of normal, intelligent people have fallen for Scientology's fake "stress test" and "personality test." Just be thankful you didn't wind up being driven as frothingly insane as heterosexual Tom Cruise! Or Kirsty Alley! Or good grief, as insane as John Travolta.

  • I love that this is a sponsored video right above the bullshit history of Hubbard one the cult paid to throw up there. Niiiiiice.

  • haha. good one @ the end

  • hhahahhaha lol this is freakn hilarious, this is definetly very much like the actual tom cruise said.

  • this guy is a total tard.

  • lol tom is just a tad craaaazy..but ass raping matt damon is a little extreme...how disgusting, matt damon would die fighting that alien lover off his ass!!!

  • Tom Cruise ass rapes Matt Damon on the weekends.

  • The actual Cruise/Scientology interviews that are parodied here are funnier and more bizarre. He has been brainwashed. The future of his life will be interesting to watch. Will he be deprogrammed? Or DP'd.

  • scientology is a weird religion.

  • Scientology is a cult but then again all religions are freaky cults. Dont trusts any of them, their all full of shit.

  • NO FUCKING SHIT!

  • It is not a religion, Stephie2007. It is only legally called a religion because Scifientology strongarmed a few members of the FBI. Well, let me tell ya, things have changed, its all new people now, and they dont give a rats ass about Scifientology.

  • What's weird about it is that you have to pay to get more bullshit information.

  • WUT THE FUCK XD

  • I really worie about katie, I rally do.

  • ?¿?¿? wtkf!! what did he say what the fuck was goin on'?? its ashit!!!!

  • the fact that a whole relegion is based on a acid indused trip by a man older than dirt is what gets me. Come on! And people by into this, daily!

  • That was fucking hilarious! XD "He says 'no' I punch him in the face and drive the ambulance myself!" Thats pretty much what he`d do too O_o scary

  • lolwhut?

  • tom cruise is a bloody nut!! everyone knows that scientology is for wackos cuz none of the stuff they preach is real! at least christians, jews, and even moslems have scriptures that are grounded in reality-not aliens!!

  • Yeah, 'cause burning bushes and men walking on water sounds like reality.

  • LMAO!!!

  • win,

  • Two views away from being #1 viewed for your channel.

  • i love that laugh!

  • Deflator Mouse's song "F*** You, Tom Cruise

    /watch?v=AEDEOqBAgVc

  • that voice is so funny

  • So if im ever at a restaurant and some guy has a heart attack ill yell out "Is anybody here a Scientologist????" HAHAHAHA!!!!

    "Let me through!!..Im a Scientologist!!"

    HAHAHAHAHA

    I can bust through the front doors of the nearest Sci center with somebody in my arms and scream "Help!! This person needs a Scientologist STAT" LOLOLOLOL

  • That's exactly what I thought when I saw his stupid, arrogant scientology video. Who the hell does Tom Cruise think he is? I'm not and never will be a scientologist but I have NEVER driven past an accident without stopping to help, this total wanker should shut up about how GREAT he is and start actually helping in this world. All his money and power could go a long way to easing suffering and poverty in the world but instead he give it to this lunatic cult! What a dick.

  • If Tom said one peep about the so called war on terror, the unjust invasion of Iraq or exposed any one of the ZioNAZIS running the US, I'd have a little respect for him despite his dickheadedness.

    Do a search for a documentary called

    Zeitgeist.

    I like his movies though, he picks good roles and executes them well.

    Other than that,,,,

  • The guy who does this voice is so funny! But I love Tom!!! :D

  • This was fucking fantastic! Short, sweet, and RIGHT on the mark! So funny.!

  • This made me lol IRL.

  • I knew someone who went from satanism to scientology. The scientology scared me more!

    Oh and we'll stop picking on cruise when he stops setting up tables while filming movies to convert people on the set to the cult.

    Sad,so sad.

  • how do i take jib jab vids and put them on youtube?? why not? i spent credits to make them mine. therein they are not copyrighted by jibjab. they are mine since i payed to make them. how do i get them on youtube?

  • Tom IS trying to help!!! He is making a

    $10 million bunker to prepare for the

    End of the World! The bunker will protect the World from the Evil Intergalactic ruler, Xenu.

    I think we should all thank Tom for being so thoughtful... naa

  • TROLL!

  • gladly

  • hmmmmmmm- if this gets me to OT8- I'll enjoy some XENU-- thanks for the invite.

  • LEAVE TOM ALONE!!

    ( lol jk, its similiar to chris crocker : LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!!)

    lol

  • i hate cris croker

  • Expect us

  • :D Lol, it's hillarious but too bad it's true :P

  • I lol'd

  • hilarious

  • Scientology cult and a scam .

  • Just say it's a religion. It's shorter.

    I cannot establish any policy merely on whether or not it will save the human race from a period of suffering or from extinction. - Geoffrey Fisher, Archbishop of Canterbury, in a letter to Philip Toynbee

    ("The worst you could do would be to usher people sooner and in their millions into a higher form of life to which they're destined anyway.")

  • but the orcs ARE there to help!

  • hahaha....

  • rofl

  • is there a schematic for that "e-meter" (ohmeter) online anywhere?

  • yes but they don't have the right to harass their critics and get criticism of their $religion$ to get pulled of tv, magazines, etc.

  • lying to innocent ppl and selling them pure bullshit is a right. so fucking what? STOP THEM! and... scientology has zero to do with god. it's clearly not a religion. do your own research.

  • hey, i laugh like that!!

  • I jump out, ask the EMT guy, 'Are you a scientologist?' He says no; I punch him in the face and drive the ambulance myself! HA-HA-HA-HA-HA.

  • Q: Why do Scientologists make you hold the E-Meter with both hands?

  • A: So you can't stop them from taking your wallet

  • lol

  • lollll!

  • I went to a scientologist rally once...and cornholed a couple of their female followers...then told them that I was just there cruising on the easy ass!!!

  • And then you beat Richard Nixon in a boxing match on Mercury

  • and right after I got the ko on Nixon in that well reknowned Mercury match I came in your mothers mouth.

  • Scientology? It's a cult. It's too bad Tom Cruise's belief system doesn't allow him to seek the help of a professional psychologist. If there is one guy who needs it, it's definitely him!

  • Scientologists were in Liverpool (UK) in August last year. I told one of the women scientologists there that she was part of acult. She started to swear at me, pushing me, and followed me all the way home. Really scary!!!

  • Why didn't you smack her in the face? ....I would have raped her.

  • Well I`m not into women but I did feel like slapping her across the face.

  • Did she accuse you of raping babies like Jenna Elfman did?

  • Well after I told her that Scientology was a cult and Ron.L.Hubbard was a tax-evading science fiction writer who said in a Church scripture "there is no Christ" she draged me out the "healing" tent and on the spot hit me with a barrage of F words in view of the public!!

  • Odd behavior isn't it. The attack that you describe is actually pretty common for most people who criticize scientology, as bizarre as it sounds.

  • I would have invited her into my home since she was following me, and then let her blow me and use my copy a dianetics to clean the nut off of her face!!! ;)