Terrible Sequel Headaches (part 2/32)

[Presidentjh]

I DIDN'T KILL MY WIFE!!!...I MEAN SOMEWHAT GIRLFRIEND!!!

[fuandon]

2:59 "Mike Dawson pulls out his magic map..."

[PurePessimism]

OH GOD. A let's play duo who are actually funny, fucking funny!! I love these guys

[jakewestwn]

Mcfly! I thought I told you never to come in here!

[jakewestwn]

I'm going to get drunk as I'm watching this. I swear. Right now.

[zlordzyxxyz]

Does the Pool place music kinda sound like it has a part from Dry Dry Desert from Paper Mario?

[creatornat]

Oh man, I am seriously crying-I am laughing so hard. XD The cucumber comment!

And the front of the Carnival looks like a picture of Anne Margret!

[armegeddis]

"In an hour or so" nonsense, it'll take at least 3.

[CrossedCelt]

...How did they make a chalk outline on grass?

[mmelendez514]

RAMIREZ, DID YOU KILL RITA!!!?!?!

[SGTHELMER]

Nice of mice and men reference

[TheFryBoy1]

@theSuperMetroid02 no, I think he would be one of the people who liked it, seeing as slowbeef and diabetus are ragging on the imposter Mike Dawson. If anything, the imposter made an account to dislike this video

[theSuperMetroid02]

The real Mike Dawson made a youtube account just so he could be the only person to dislike this video

[ConservativeCat]

I just noticed, is that Rita's sexy pic hung up in the pool hall?

[dudefather]

Oh god, Hank's voice sounds so familiar...

[grottypissedstained]

She died as she lived: Dancing.

[Redirukod]

Does Hank sound alot like that one prospector dude from The Final Sacrifice?

[UberNiftyMan]

Is Mrs. Remirez Psychedelic Eyeball's mother?

[Lehpumeh]

FINGER GUNZ :D

[t2thefox]

They really roped that area off with a chalk outline on the ground and left it there for over a year?

[DorianCairne]

@t2thefox Rita wasn't murdered a year ago, that's just when Mike arrived back in the town. Rita's murder only just happened.

[HaughtyFlapper]

5:08 "Woah, what genre is this?"

It would still be horror.

[TheSVSexton]

Is this a game about Billy MC?



[KaraMayonakaSora]

Fun fact: Chalk outlines aren't used for signaling the former location of a body. It contaminates the evidence.

Way to prove your know-how, Dark Seed II.

[SQUIZZLER24]

The local police chief doesn't want to waste time on a case?

A MURDER case?

Eh, I guess it's not important.

[arce148]

Wooden fence, one pad lock. Whelp might as well be Fort Knox

[LordIronHat]

The reason that Hank's bar is empty is because everyone left when they saw Dawson coming and decided it wasn't cool to be there anymore.

Let's face it, any place that Dawson enters is considered uncool until he leaves.

[TonyBranston]

Nice video Diabeetus, but 100 coffee cups aren't a lot of hats

[qwertyuiop78945612]

Is that Kefka's final form all over the lady's roof

[sympathy3k21]

At least the lawn doesn't need mowing.

[vsnlps]

She said "It was at onetime the oldest building in town" That means it still is the oldest building in town.

1 star out of 100 for that.

[JackIsASexyMf]

Is this eugene murmen?

[hola4adola]

Jack disliked this video cause u made fun of his hair....

[AmazingL4rry]

This guy is a writer right? What did this stunted little weiner write about that was compelling enough to sell the quantity of books required to buy the shitty retard house from the first game?

Also what happened with that trench coat he wouldn't be caught dead in? I want to know where it is now.

Additionally this game needs a "grotty piss stained toilet", every shitty horror game needs one.

[K1llZ0n3]

Did anyone even realize that it was a chalk outline... ON GRASS!?

[IXIFatTonyIXI]

@K1llZ0n3 they used LOTS of chalk.

[xWhiteClaudiax]

As soon as I saw the chalk outline I realized that Rita was probably Wile E. Coyote.

[12ismorethan2]

How much do you want to bet that Jack is imaginary?

[DarkOmegaMK2]

Wait a minute... if Rita was beheaded, how is it that her mark on the murder crime scene includes the head?

I detect some inconsistency... but otherwise, this game if perfect in every way.

[FinalGamerJames]

Man that jukebox mocks the shit out of him with that outline.

"HEY MIKE REMEMBER WHEN RITA DANCED LIKE THIS"

[kmoodyblues]

If the writers were trying to create a depressing mood in this game, they succeeded. Mike's life, even before the events of the first game, was pretty lonely, and now he's even more of an outcast.

Other than that, this game is pretty sucky. I love dialogue in adventure games, but you shouldn't tell all of the story through conversations. IT'S FREAKING BORING.

[JeffMkII]

Why the fuck does Hank sound like Ralph from The Muppets? Also loving the game's liberal use of the general MIDI choir voice.

[TheLastThingWeNeed]

"Sorry Mike, I forgot you two were friends, even though you and I have know each other for quite sometime, and both you and Rita came in here often, drinking sodas and dancing to fifties music."

[grendelee]

@TheLastThingWeNeed Sorry, we are out of ketchup. Here is your ketchup.

[DorianCairne]

Yep, it's official: the writers of this game were on a mission to get back at this Dawson twat for making himself the main character of the game by writing him as the most whiny and pathetic character in video game history. "Yeah, where's your hammy declarations of car battery functionality NOW, Dawson?!"

[marioVSshadow]

My Dad was in the insurance business...

I'm sorry to here that...

[Chainsawsb]

Please tell me you guys didn't do all 6 hours in 1 sitting lol.

[popsodarootbeers]

If it's six hours long, it would be 24 15 minute parts

[RedSHARK6]

Jack is just too fucking cool.

[pullahoko]

Why on Earth did the ancients choose Mike Dawson of all people to implant their world-destroying alien embryo into?

If it ever hatched it would probably just jump out of Mike's near-vacant skull, spend a few hours honking car horns and talking to itself, and then die of starvation being too stupid to eat.

[jettythesunfish]

@pullahoko It's because his head is empty and unoccupied. A relic of a dark past or maybe...a dark future.

[LordoftheAshaman]

@pullahoko

Because his head is so empty, it's got room for it to incubate.

[SpyWhoLovedHimself]

@pullahoko

Because there are no "ancients". Just a crazy Dawson! I know the ending is "ambiguous" but I think it's pretty obvious.

[EpicFailGirl]

@SpyWhoLovedHimself Spoilers... :<

[RDV333]

@pullahoko Because they thought he was the human most prone to failing the destruction of their plan?

[jakewestwn]

@pullahoko ha ha great comment but i'm 3 months later so by now you forgot and are like wtf???

[kuriboh400]

@pullahoko For some reason your comment made lol very hard 

[Presidentjh]

@pullahoko Every once and a while someone makes a comment that just blows the world away with hilarity. Yours is one of them. Congratulations.

[HeavyxMedic53]

I love how the characters and locations look like they were done with seperate programs

[PickpocketSan]

Is it me, or does Mike Dawson sound an awful lot like ActionBastard? Too bad he acts more like Tyler. "Alright, Mike, we'll put off the interrogation. We'd be able to solve this case already if you weren't acting like a petty little douchebag."

[KantorekBaumerB14]

you guys have balls of steel to play six hours of this utter, utter tripe

[narcolepticchairftw]

@KantorekBaumerB14 they're not playing it.

[KantorekBaumerB14]

@narcolepticchairftw sorry meant watch, which is almost as bad

[DaveDaviddsonn]

6 hours? God damn, you guys deserve a fucking medal after 6 hours of that game.

[ElrondHubbard54]

It's like they took everything bad about darkseed 1, covered it in shit, lengthened it considerably, and called it Darkseed 2.

[archaon98]

I'd like Slowbeef to be my dad.

[Darlos9D]

God I actually can't watch this. The awful dialog just goes on and on and on...

[FunkyHonkyCDXX]

Glad I brought cans.

[TheAnonftw]

The real life mike dawson is clearly a time traveller who based all of his characters in darkseed 2 off people who were retsupuraed. Mike dawson is played by billy, that tough pool guy kinda sounds like musclebomber and Hank is clearly sirronlionheart. Electrical beast will be everyone at the circus of course.

[wabdih]

 this game is so fucking boring, yet so entertaining. Am I the only one who feels this way?

[DarkOmegaMK2]

BillyMC - The Game

[rickhh1]

30 minutes and nothing but character expositions. But no clue towards why it matters right now. It's like a bad Canadian film.

[MellowMink]

Darkseed 1 looks like the best game ever compared to this awful sequel. Seriously, does anything ever happen in this game? There's been 75 minutes of random dialogue so far, with almost no appearance of the dark world at all.

[posthumanfetus]

What's weird is that in one of the darkseed 1 videos, retsupurae posted in the comments that this game was around 2 hours long. How did it become 5 hours?

[BenjaminEllett]

@posthumanfetus Slowbeef probably forgot how long the game was untill he checked his LP of it and realised its actually a long ass game.

[videogamenostalgia]

@posthumanfetus Maybe this is just a really slow playthrough. There's one on youtube that I think is less than 2 hours.

[MetalVikingGreg]

@videogamenostalgia That's just the tool assistant speed run.

[EternalGuardian07]

@NostalgicSince2005 Not to mention Jack may have something stuck up his ass.

[DenOfVipers]

5:18: "But I have mwy wuney!"

[GenjiFirefly]

So wait.

The lady who owns a church hates everyone because of their decadence?

And she has a bunch of money?

Which she will hoard instead of donate?

Mixed message there, Ms. Ramirez.

[TheSheeplealarmclock]

illuminati symbolism, eye in pyramid @0.3.18

[Tordah26]

0:31

At least the lawn doesn't need mowing.

[jaster030]

Holy crap, Diabetus is funny.

[videogamenostalgia]

Jack's bald spot is my favourite character

[DSMarisen]

Why would you waste your time on these horrible games. They're not even entertaining, and the ratio of time : good material to shoot off about is WAYYY too low.

[wittyreviewer]

Wait....that Jukebox emblem...is that...

DRR DRR DRR

[EdMan6623]

Is it just me or does Jack sound like Blade Hunter?

[jsh020]

@EdMan6623 they are both the biggest badass's ever

[DaniellaChan92]

6 hours? 'Beef, you guys can make it through 6 hours of this? O_o so... 360 minutes dividing by 15... 24 videos... so, 'Beef, it's about 24-26 videos total... unless it was a typo and are actually 32 videos and what you ment to say is that it will be round 8 hours... which is even more impressing :/

[paulwarnstedt]

Damn, Jack is the coolest cat in Town, i wish i would have his attitude

[EinDose]

This game's backgrounds are starting to remind me of Death Trap.

This is going to end with guessing which coffee cup won't kill us, isn't it?

[Neotails8762]

I'm beginning to think this may be the last alert for Mike Dawson here.

[EpicFailShark]

Why do you guys keep playing the shittiest games?

Today we are going to watch an Atari flash lets play.



[TheSzlaszdot]

After playing sicx hour sof this, I'd react pretty much like the floating chick heat in the intro.

[TheToast7]

I was going to think of something funny to say, but then I decided to just say "another great video guys! thanks for giving us so much quality retsupurae time together!"

In all honesty, I find these longplays, this one in particular, to be even better than the "golden" retsupurae days of navgtr and billymc. But that's just my opinion.

[TheMentlegenStudio]

Did you notice the Jukebox's emblem is the same dance form of Rita's dead body chalking?

[RedEggsCereal]

I cried at 9:15

[bobbyewing311]

lmao "i'm so bummed over that MURDER"

[RetroLPer]

I watched Part1 on Blip, and I'm hooked. Definently one of the funniest retsupurae videos I've ever seen, laughed my fucking ass off the whole time :D

[TheIr0nMike]

I have a feeling the real Mike Dawson was a douche to everyone at Cyber Dreams. It would at least explain why he's now a whiny bitch in this game.

[gammer338]

Strap in, it's gonna b a long one

[SamuraiFoochs]

Ahhh. the haunting "Jazzy Theme for Homoerotic Porch Chats". A classic.

[rrmbball]

So this is supposed to be a game, and games are supposed to be fun right? So how exactly is this fun?

[Kuronji]

You need the cross to kill the zombie clowns in order to obtain the carnival key.

[Romalian]

You aren't SERIOUSLY gonna upload 32 parts... Are you? I mean, ya didn't upload the entire Nostalgia critic one.

[ICodeInDreams]

@Romalian I think the main reason he didn't upload the Nostalgia Critic RP to YouTube is because he thought there might be some fair use violation threats with the "bigger name" of the Nostalgia Critic, and YouTube tends to have a "shoot first" approach to dealing with those.

Although if I were him, I'd just send us to Blip.tv to watch it. 32 parts is crazy.

[EvanCWaters]

@ICodeInDreams Even on Blip it's still huge (and divided up a bit), so I'm sticking with this. Breaks it up into manageable chunks.

[steveharley0345]

@Romalian

Uh... BlipTV? They couldn't upload here because of copyright.

[Kngummy]

"At one point it was the oldest building for miles." So they built a new, older building?

[PinstripeHourglass]

Uh, Slowbeef, about your guess... Are you working on the assumption you'll cut out some of the source material? Because in a fit of boredom and procrastination I counted up the times for the original longplay and... it's nearly 9 hours long.

[c0nqu3r3rlol]

My grotty piss stained refrigerator magnet

[Venominous]

"Hang loose"

Ok, my pants are off, now what?

[A6YHUTYFITTUYV7]

jesus christ this game is so fucking boring

[horngatekeeper]

Maybe Mike Dawson deserves his professorship after all, judging by the huge drop in quality after he left the company.

[CyanFunk]

Hey! There's a carnival two sunglasses away from my house too!

[Zknight7126]

Too much of the bad talking.

[TheDarkSwampert]

I really miss you guys making fun of bad lpers on youtube... No offence but these long plays are borring...

[ConservativeCat]

I love Diabeetus' reaction to that loser in the pool hall calling Mike a Doofus. It's so perfect.

[razor8191]

God, Mike Dawson is the most idiotic, spastic, and whiniest character I've ever seen a video game.

[6Shooter28]

I was genuinely concerned for my life due to laughing too hard after "two sunglasses away from my house."

[TheUptightBoys]

This sequel reminds me of a dark past and somehow.....a dark future.

[Urmean15]

Let's Marathon

[cousinted]

"What. Is. Up. My. Ass."

*SOund of motorcycle revving up that sounds suspiciously like explosive flatulence*

[piggemz]

huh 6 hours total? 15 minute videos, four per hour is 24 videos. and u mispelled guess. this retsulongplay seems strangely out of place

[cousinted]

@piggemz

Like a relic of a dark past? Or perhaps a...dark future?

[piggemz]

@cousinted yeah

[TheRadicalOneNG]

Murder isn't a disease! It's a terrible game.

[Gdog120]

Whose is this so called "beef" and what happened to slowbeef

[MitchZer0II]

Mom and dad never talked about this episode of happy days...

[3Gads]

Remember when the protagonist didn't sound like a 14 year old?

[TheorySH]

32 is your guest, Slowbeef?

I hope you treat him right. That is to say, that you don't put an alien embryo in his head or force him to play terrible, dialogue-heavy video games with four or five frames of animation per character.

The typo is excusable considering you had to sit through this shit for six hours.

[Chiller326]

@TheorySH Also 100 yen is not a lot of money

[TheorySH]

@Chiller326 And marshal is an acceptable spelling.

Retsupurae really needs to shock the industry at this point. I, for one, am tired of these glaring examples of not doing the research before RPing. It's almost as if these guys don't have degrees in Let's Play.

[Chiller326]

@TheorySH I have a challenge for Slowbeef. Create a storyline where Diabetus gets diabetes! Think of the drama as wait shit.

[TheorySH]

@Chiller326 wait a minute diabetus really have diabetes man i better go ask him on formspring just to make sure

[deemo665]

@Chiller326 Diabetus actually does have diabetes. Too late.

Maybe a biography?

[FoolyCoolyMabase]

@TheorySH I think Slowbeef actually invited over for dinner some guy called 32

[EyeInTriangle1]

@TheorySH It most definitely says guess.

[TheorySH]

@EyeInTriangle1 It most definitely said "guest" last night.

Did you really think 125 people were blind enough to read that incorrectly? I wouldn't blame you; headaches are pretty common in this RP.

[EyeInTriangle1]

@TheorySH Yeah I guess you're right. I need to go see doctor sims tomorrow.

[type87randomXD]

I want to take my load on your feet?! the shit?

[MisterMittensjr]

I saw jack walk up then spent the majority of the dialogue trying to balance my phone on my nose...

[T00stoopid]

He wants to take his load on his feet what?

[antisadism]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA­AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

[posthumanfetus]

*puts arm around you* "I'm here to get your BUTT motivated"

jeez

[hehehe88]

@posthumanfetus coincidentally, that is my favorite pick up line. I use it all the time.

[DukeOnkled]

@posthumanfetus

"That flatfoot doesn't know his BUTT from an armadillo!"

[giygasfeelsgood]

only 30 parts to go!

[giygasfeelsgood]

@giygasfeelsgood more or less

[XxMariofan21xX]

@giygasfeelsgood October will be over before you know it.

[Own44j4]

first!