Black males be yourself!!!

[thesalones]

omg!!! u hit it on the money!! coming from a females perspective..alot of women say they know what they want..but when its put b4 their face, they don't know how to react and push the good man away..and usually it tends to be that the women is not so confident with themselves and worry what others may think on how he dresses or talks or simply bc the woman has a list of things she wants and simply she is superficial and will never be content with herself..

[budrajae]

you like little girl DATEMEDEAR.INFO

[2pac4realu]

you're sexy when you smoke:)

[bnote1990]

I feel like these videos speak directly to me, even though I'm black and not biracial...so where are the best cities to be young, educated and black?

[Thedarksecret1]

People are going to be however they want to be. There's nothing you can do about it. Trust me, there are as many fucked up white people as there are black people. You have your good and bad in every race.

[ladyEulaelie]

I wish Black men really would just be themselves. I just canceled a 1st date with a Black guy b/c a phone conversation. One of the major reasons: It was like he was trying to sound cool and thugish and it really annoyed me. Not knowing how to speak your 1st and ONLY language and purposely being ignorant in speech....not attractive. He could not have tried harder to look like a fool.

If you are a geek and don't come off as a hard ganster, so what? BE YOURSELF, not what you see on BET.

[woyay]

this whole community thing to me is kinda gettin to me because I know people are racists and everything but like.. I mean... at the same time I didn't realize how serious it was until later on.. play world of warcraft..

[patriciacarrasco]

i think its cuz black females dont think they deserve something good..it happenned to me..i always went for what was wrong for me, a man who dont give a shit about me cuz i wasnt raised right..most of us are raised superficially..btw, im not black im dominican but..we have alot of black in us so i can relate...

[BantuNation]

I'm 25 man, and this is truth. I live it everyday, and every time I deal with black females, and ANY females in general. Its all the media.

[cantgetlaidforshit]

You aren't the only one who lives this life. Look at my videos. I'm not a virgin but i don't get many women.

[yaaboygip]

ZZZzzzzzzz.....

[yaaboygip]

Like I said, you're living in a fantasy world. I've been all over the U.S. and I rarely see white guys with ANY black women. You may think I have something against you and other sistas, but I don't!...I'm just telling the truth!

If you watch SWP and a few other dudes on here talking about this topic, you will see the validity in it. Why are you trying to convince me that white guys are snatching up blk women when we all know it's not true?

[yaaboygip]

@caramelprincessxxx40 ...Don't deny the truth! Unless you look like Beyonce, Rihanna, Alicia Keys or Halle Berry, not many non-black men will come your way. You see it and I see it!

GET OUT OF YOUR FANTASY WORLD!

[MegaJDash]

Women are superficial, most White males are given everything from the day they are born, this put's us at an instant disadvantage.

What annoys me is when white men and women smirk over this kind of stuff, any black man that makes something of himself is much more of a man than a white kid who's got to where he is through handout's.

Every woman should aknowledge that.

[bmatt820]

Great comment, i agree with this.

[woyay]

@MegaJDash it's funny that you say that because I"m black I've grown up with white males with them given everything from the day they were born... I think that I was given everything from the day I was born.. and it seemed like I had even more than everyone including other white males.. and I had black friends and they also had things.. actually they might have been kind of poor but they would always hang out with me and like I mean we really had fun they are kinda rich now though heh..

[sugarcane1984]

There are plenty of good, decent and kind black women if you look in the right place. I suggest you try church (and I'm not kidding).

So many black men say they want a good woman, tell them to go to church and they will laugh at you.

[TheMoosecatchick]

I've never been w/ a thug in my entire life! Nor will I ever! I don't know where the hell that assumption about black women comes from! Neither my friends of myself are like that! Perhaps hoodrat black women play that shit, but not this one! That's not the majority! The men want to leave me for the slutty round the way town mattress woman!!! Latinas and white women tend to like losers too! And you name a good black man that actually is checking for a black woman besides yourself!

[yaaboygip]

We don't worry about what blk women like anymore. Thats what gets blk men in trouble! The black male movement is now underway. This movement is to strengthen brotherhood among blk men. Black men need to look out for themselves before thinking of someone else.

[APerfectDayElise]

Just say no to thugs. :)

[DEADHEROS81]

If you are not an alphamale you can't date a black woman. They like thugs, and if your not thugish, then they're gonna be callin' you out, tryin' to emasculate you by saying a dude is gay, even though they know your not.

[MrSuperboiii]

The thuggish bling bling look is glorified as being Masculine on TV. So alot of women are indeed attracted to them. But most woman will tell you that that image has nothing on the image of a Successful good man who still has their "Black" Swagger. Examples: President Obama, Denzel Washington, idris elba, Chamar Moore, Tyson Becford. Ect ect ..

[MrSuperboiii]

You got some valid points on this video and I agree with alot of what you stated. But I think alot of times "Good Black Men" tend to take on traits that are generic. That are common traits of what an "Average American Man" is suppose to look dress act and talk like. By doing this, the Black Man loses his Natrual Swagger which is what women of all races to them. Black Men are heavily saught after by women not just for their looks but also for their Masculine Personification.

[Jade301]

WoW! This was an excellent video. I agree with everything you said. I'm definitely putting this under my "Favorites", and btw, I'm a new sub lol :)

[babyg57]

I'm a black woman and I have noticed this too.  So sad

[justified1975]

Preach my Brotha !!

[nicoleiffound]

I don't really agree with everything you say,I feel like black guys think just because your a good guy I have to like you..I might just not be attracted to you or we just might not connect like I really hate that they think just cause you might be a good guy I gotta settle for you..like you always tell the guys not to settle for less but it's like your tellin us females were jerks or something for not being with these guys just cause there good guys..maybe were just not into them like that

[Lorenzo312]

Then we gotta hear your sob stories about all the lowlifes that abused and beat you in the past meanwhile the "good" cats, regardless of race, get left with you using us to fill THAT hole ( the emotional one, no pun or joke intended) in you life and then dump us off when you find some guy like you're shopping. Then you (the collective you, as unfair as that sounds) get older and HAVE to settle for a 70% brotha and not the 95% brotha you had before (Katt Williams reference).

[nicoleiffound]

oh plz never that idk about other girls but I dnt date lowlifes or thugs...and I'm not a fan of emotional baggage nor do I have any relationship baggage..I'm just saying that I dnt have to date a guy just cause he's good on paper..and to try and categorize me or any other females as ppl who just date jerks for the fun of it is kinda ignorant to me...like who wants to get their heart broken...I know I don't and that's exactly why no matter what I don't settle when it comes to relationships

[lilyrara]

This was a great video!

oh and I love the heartfelt earnesty

"Why...Because I care...I care man"

It's a shame..but honestly I don't think there's much that can be done. This has been going on too long for the cycle to be broken. Hope I can be proved wrong but I'm just a realist : /

[marcdaddy33]

good vid, bro.

[balance512]

Very true. I have a whole philosophy about this, and I think it has alot to do with the media. I have really tried to raise my sons to be themselves, and not follow the bs images in the media. My oldest is 16 now and the young ladies are swarming! These are educated and confident young women black, white, hispanic, asian. If the young women is decent she is not looking for the "caricature" of a black man. Being authentic and confident is very attractive. Like you said, be who you are.

[jaymoragne]

this shit is so true....

[elliottwoodnorth]

I will only date a white girl that is 18 or 19 teen anything older she might be racist as hell. I don't have the energy to get older white women to like me. waste of time.

[NegraBendita]

I think his page says he's from NY so your theory doesn't hold up. BTW I've been to the West Coast, Mid West, and live on the East Coast. There are uptight folks all over as well as racists. Being one's self is important no matter where you go.

[missAKAsnapshot]

That is so true...Men continue to BE YOURSELF..there are still good black women out there! I'm a little taken by this because we are out there .probably searching just as hard...bmatt820, it's probably the area, you need to come to Atlanta lol anywho..good black men DONT Give up!

[ohveryyoung]

idiot guy for the rest of her life. i've seen a lot of women go both ways, but most of the time women come to their senses and realize they deserve a man who can be their friend as well as their lover, and not lie and cheat on them and treat them like crap.

[ohveryyoung]

most of my white female friends went through a period of time in the 20's where they only wanted "bad boys", myself included. i think it has to do with our dna; it's about evolution. I'm not saying it's right. It's just that the "alpha male" is desired because he is perceived as being extra strong(i.e. good genes), and women fine themselves attracted to them without even realizing why. women have two choices: they can either outgrow this kind of mentality, or they can be unhappy, chasing an

[brightlights456X]

To ohveryyoung,

Yeah, what you say is true, but what man wants the woman who's been ran through and comes to her sense in her late 20's early 30's.

Sorry, but I do not want to be second choice.

[ohveryyoung]

hey, i'm not saying it's desirable to have a girl who has been "ran through" (LOL, interesting way of putting it).....just that it happens.

[brightlights456X]

It happens, but that doesn't mean one has to except it. I'll mess around with women like that, but deep down I know what they are and after a few months or less I call it a day.

[NegraBendita]

This problem is two-fold, some black women are over looking black men with good qualities because they are too materialistic and shallow. They are equating the wrong image (nice car, bling, clothes) with being a "good" man. But then again black men are doing it too. You think a decent black woman is coming your way even though you have your cake and eat it too with the "ran through" women that you've grown tired of after a few months?

[brightlights456X]

\\"with the "ran through" women that you've grown tired of after a few months?"//

Yeah, but we're not looking to marry her, probably just wanted a fling.

The difference is that once a black man enters university and there afterwards much more options become availble to him. An overweight or unattracive BW expects to be chosen before an attractive non-black female, it doesn't work like that. Bmatt might have these problems because of his job, but a black lawyer or doctor will not.

[brightlights456X]

Then I would choose the attractive BW over the attractive non-black woman.

[brightlights456X]

....BUT her age will still be a factor.

[Lorenzo312]

...age, maturity level, and baggage play a factor.

[brightlights456X]

Very true.

[DarkPrince081]

LOL. There's nothing "alpha" about them. Human beings have the ability of choice. You can be timid today and bold tomorrow. Ha Ha. We see where these "alpha males" took the black community. Way to advance the species. LOL. Oh lord!!!

[ohveryyoung]

yeah, i'm not saying it's a good thing...it's just the reality of things sometimes. do you ever wonder why certain people have chemistry with some people and not others. it's biological, among other things

[DarkPrince081]

eh. Most of the time its just lust. Lust is drawn up by an extremity on the qualities that both men and women look for in each other. It gets old.

Saying that what women lust after is the ideal man that men should subscribe to be or is an alpha male is like me saying that women who dress and behave like real-life porn stars are the ideal woman. No, men give her attention because they want to have sex with her as if she was an object. See what I'm saying?

[ohveryyoung]

who said men should be alpha males? i think it would be wise for a man to NOT be an alpha. it will take him longer to find a good woman, but at least he can be sure that she is into him for the right reasons. now, that being said, a confident man, whether alpha or not, will always attract more girls. in my experience, the guys who complain the most about girls being attracted to alphas are guys who need to work on their self esteem so they can be more confident. just my 2 cents...

[DarkPrince081]

I agree. You were the one talking about women wanting "alpha males" because of strength and good genes or whatever. I just stated calling bad boys alphas was silly. Of course confident men get more women. That's the way it should be. I don't think Bmatt is talking about that. He's talking about how regular guys of other races get quality women but regular black men don't.

[Misterjay212]

Bmatt820.You made alot of good points.Alot of women are indecisive,superficial,and hypocritical.They don't know what they want.Alot of good men do doubt themselves if they haven't found what you looking for.some girls came be a pain in the ass.

[DarkOneSun09]

For a black man to actually have standards means that he's going to be a lonely man.

SMDH.

Later,

[DarkOneSun09]

There aren't enough TRULY good black women to go around bruh. It's true. In spite of the so-called, black male shortage, most of the good black women, think that they are TOO good for black men. Women of other races, yeah, I guess, if you can find one who ain't racist as fucking hell--which is tough.

It's a damn shame bruh.

Later,

[DarkOneSun09]

Howver, I see thuggish black men going from one woman to the next. It's like women of any race will only date a black man who's a damn thug, and if they don't like black THUGS, they don't like black en AT ALL. Men of other races can just be THEMSELVES and women still like them and give them respect.

Black men are treated like SHIT; good or bad. Even handsome black dudes are treated badly.

Something is wrong dude.

Later,

[DarkOneSun09]

I'm in the Bay Area, and sometimes, I am absolutely AMAZED at the amount of disdain I get sometimes bruh. Here I am a clean-cut nice guy, and I get nothing but HATRED. I have wondered if it was because II was unattractive and everything else. However, I have had alot of people say that I was a handsome dude

However, I get nothing BUT hatred from most women out here. Especially, when I am out by myself.

Something is wrong here.

Later,

[DarkOneSun09]

What you said right here bruh was the ABSOLUTE TRUTH @ 3:28 - 3:53 .

It's a damn shame. When you are a black man, YOU GOT TO HAVE IT ALL. If you don't, then you are seen as all around WORTHLESS.

SMDH.

Later,

[DarkOneSun09]

Or these 'good' black women have standards so damn high for a black man, that very few can EVER attain to them. It's sad bruh. Other women love their men, but black women don't really love theirs. And to top it off, women of other races are ALSO racist against black men. Damn, who in the hell is going to love the good black men?

Later,

[DarkOneSun09]

COSIGN on what your friend said @ 0:30 - 1:05 bruh. I can relate on this. The problem is, in my honest opinion, is if the black woman is any damn good at ALL, she is practically SWARMED with offers from black men who want her; the reason being is that, honestly, there are more good black men out here than black women. When a black man comes across a black woman what actually IS good, she has too many other options to choose from. After a while he gets lost in the storm bruh.

Later,

[083770]

DarkOneSun09, you keep using the term "good" to describe a worthy black woman. Now Matt described his view of a good black man, with which you don't seem to disagree. Does this translate also to a "good black woman"? What i mean is, do you describe a good black woman to (simply) be one who is clean, has a good credit, a decent job, a car, and a house?

Good is a relative term, so to better understand, would you mind clarifying? Thank you.

[jaymoragne]

maybe he means a woman who doesn't need to depend on a man for everything.

[083770]

Interesting, jaymoragne. Now when YOU say "everything", I wonder how DarkOneSun09 would define "everything." Maybe you could help me out by disclosing what YOU mean by EVERYTHING. I'll start a list, and you circle the things on the list. Love, moral support, intimacy, sex, raise children, friendship, money, etc.

Please keep in mind there are a few Black Men who criticize Black Women for flaunting their independence. So, understanding what YOU mean by EVERYTHING would be helpful. Thanks.

[jaymoragne]

I'm not criticizing anyone. I'm happy for independent black women. Why are you trying to turn this into an argument?

[083770]

The vibe I got from YOU jaymoragne was NOT critical at all. It would help if DarkOneSun09 was the one to answer my original question. Thanks anyway, though. Don't take offense. It's just that it would be helpful for me to understand another's point of view when subjective terms 'good' and hyperbolic terms like 'everything' are used. A good example is how BMatt820 described what he meant by "good black man".

[DarkOneSun09]

What you said @ 4:50 - 5:10 is how I feel all the damn time. It's like a black man is NEVER good enough for anybody unless he is PERFECT. It ain't just black women who has this view either; it's ALL women, from my personal experience.

Later,

[DarkOneSun09]

This is so true bruh. I am going through this right now. It seems like the good black man is the most unappreciated soul on this planet. Nobody wants a decent black man.

Later,

[robuzzel]

I feel and linger on every word you say. We need to talk and get our Mulatto Podcast and revolution going for becoming YouTube Partners. Holla at me on the cellie when you get a chance my nigga!

[pinkpuma1213]

bmatt, take no offense. but perhaps your friend needs to be asking women what he asked you and perhaps this is part of the problem.

especially if its happened more than once, perhaps it doesnt help him to hear you say, ya man its the women.

i mean bc even if this is true, that your friends lack of sucess is the fault of a steady stream of indecisive women-- then whats his solution?

[Rmkb1]

This was a really good video man.

[djdevil0000]

Seriously Bro, They really dont desire the real brothas

[JAYLOVE47]

Classic....this is just a CLASSIC video..You made so many great points..I have to show my friends this...ima post this on my myspace if you dont mind Matt..ima just feature it on my myspace profile..because I couldnt have said it better...this probably ya best vid thus far...very accurate video

Thank you so much for this video Matt:)

[Azzaiel]

black women hate me! but i am like catnip to blonds lol

[Azzaiel]

it's called TV "programming."

[DAKOOLKIDTV]

bmatt im going to give you a video response.

[VAswang]

Of course the whole "black women dating thugs" issue has been covered ad nauseam, but I think what contributes to this problem is that a lot of black MEN don't respect other black men who are considered to be "regular" or "squares" or whatever. Athletes, thugs, hustlers, etc. get put on a pedestal and get respect from other black men, so a lot of black women follow suit.

[barlog20]

Thank You very much for making this vid.This situation is one of the biggest reasons why so many black men are single.But the media isn`t screaming poor black men.But they love screaming poor you know who.BTW, i think i know who wrote you that letter cause i got a similiar letter recently.

[DarkOneSun09]

I think it's about time they did barlog. Black men don't want to admit it, but we have a serious problem bruh. You have got a lot of black men suffering in silence bruh. And the problem is, is that quality women of--of any race--who will choose a black an FIRST are so damn rare, that it's not even worth mentioning.

It ain't just black women dude. Alot of women, black and non-black, see black men as the worst unless he is deemed EXEPTIONAL.

This is true about women of all races.

[boostmeup]

must be an american thing dude, cus in England white women want black men so much that our birth rate is being wiped out. Afro-carribeans are expected to be non exisant in the UK in 2 generations. 7 out 10 black carribean men have kids with non black women. I can PM you the article if you want.

[DarkOneSun09]

It IS an american thing.

[worldworks]

like I said I apologize for that....

Vanity issues are what's destroying cultures not race.

[kizzmac]

That's why I don't feel sorry for these women years down the line. They got kids, overweight, or have stress and emotional problems then. It's funny they have no problem trying to find you then. Fuck them, you ain't getting me.

[215dro]

This video is so true, I see it all the time. Most black woman look at the black dude wearing the suit and inteligent gets overlooked, while the black thug riding around with a bunch of ignorant dudes smoking weed and disrespecting woman get the play from most decent looking woman. I just do not get it, Definitly be who you are, and stay positive and progressive, hopefully you would get a woman not slutted out and bitter.

peace,