Added: 2 months ago
From: swiftkaratechop
Views: 40,320
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  • I love your eyes. -3

  • sit sit sit sit sit on you!

  • "And you like money because you're a butthole" -best line.

  • I honestly find your newer ones funnier but they all are good c:

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  • I finally have finished all your vids and have laughed at every Ask Swifty. I don't know what people are talking about the old ones being better:]

  • I FUCKING LOVE HIM. PENIS

  • I swear, when I clicked on this, I thought you were Jesus

  • He is so goddamn gorgeous. But his eyes make him look high in this vid.

  • does anybody else think that he kinda looks like jesus?<3

  • you make me happy and you brighten my day!

    <3

  • the grass is green because plants contain mostly chloriphyll in them

  • can you just make a 10 minute long video of you fixing and flipping your hair...with your glasses on half the time...

  • So punch him in the dick with a brick and keep movin'. Lol your crazy swifty (:

  • THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE!!! :D

  • punch him in the dick with a brick. hahahahha xDDD

  • Swifty, you havent failed. i'll always remember the phrase you gave us that i use a lot. "Barrel of Dicks" and i dig the tim and eric awesome show great job reference :)

  • 3:25 -  3:37 sexyness

  • YOU BRIGHTEN MY DAY MATT.

  • YOU BRIGHTEN MY DAY MATT. 

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  • lolololololol xD "Sit, sit, sit on you, sit, sit, sit on you, this is what I do, this is what I do, I sit on you, I sit, sit on you, sit.... not agian!" xD OMJ roflmao

  • You know, everyone tells you look like Jesus a lot but with that white shirt and that necklace.......it really brings out the ~~holiness~~

  • no top comments?

    this is my chance! penis!

  • At first I thought he said:

    why is the sky blue

    why is grass green

    and why do I love my knee

  • im in love with ask swifty you never failed me lol you are freakin awesome and ... i now catch myself randomly saying DICKS or penis!!! Specially when I play Xbox360 and fail or get hit XD

  • REAL SHIT NOW! REALL SHITTTT!!

  • YAHH GIRRLLL!!!!!

  • Swifty's a scorpio c:

  • he ish so cyute wen he got all forseriousness:)

  • omg my eyessss sooo blurrryyy

  • ITS A FRIKKIN SWEET EYEBAAAALLLLLLLLLL

    i soo rofl'd hard right there xD

  • :thatsracist:

  • I love your long hair, don't cut it.

  • ok so what is our fav. thing about your hair, and why??? oh and turtles!

  • This one was gooood!:D

    

  • regarding to your first question; yes, yes I am ;) ohhhGod, just kidding!

  • 2:26 I love this laugh.

  • Is he always crazy.

  • Ok so don't kill me, but you've gotten ugly... *flinches* DON'T MURDER ME!

    I JUST WANT OUR GOATEE SWIFTY BACK!

  • dude u always make me happy just keep doing these vids man

  • Ahahaahahhaha niicce

  • Serious moment :) ...... Dicks....

  • Does swifty have a p.o box? Why are taranchulas bad a*s? Swifty i dare you to dance in your underwear on camera.

  • what part of alabama is he from im glad to see a succsefulish youtuber from the heart of dixie or where im from southside birmingham nigga gonna get shotville

  • Ignore all those ungrateful people saying you aren't good anymore. I've seen every episode and I still always have a smile on my face when I watch these.

  • 3:34 - 3:38

    I was waiting for you to say 'I whip mah hair back & forth'

  • You still make us happy!!!!

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  • nice big nice part then u say dicks...... oh how i love swifty!!!!

  • same shirt

  • You look so much like my brother! Maybe yall are twins?!?!?!?!?!?!

  • so is Emma Roberts a dude or are you a chick?

    I mean, you talk about the things you want a lot.

    and you say Penis quite often[:

    o_o

    :3

  • i must subscribe....

  • 5:48 so u've been rubbing your eyes alot ooooorr....ur high....maybe thats why ur so AWESOME during ur videos....U DICIDE!

  • daw i love swiftys apology <3 

  • Apology accepted :,-)

  • @LauraLameAss hes from Alabama.(:

  • I just started watching him & I wanna know where he is from does anybody know?

  • Are you a penis curled cheeto

  • "my family doesnt judge...we fuck everything!" :D

    thats fucking hilarious!

  • I've missed you Swifty!!! You brighten upy day like glowing vagina juices all over my face! Would you do a Twi'lek off of starwars?!?!?!?! o.0?

  • What happened to Jill????

  • Swifty you have the most beautiful eyes EVER <3

  • So I have seen every single one of your videos right, and I just noticed you have a sick eyebrow arch thing going on there! So... yea!.... Congrats on your face... and its attractiveness! XDD (Btw I meant sick as in cool... js)

  • swifty you helped me and my friend meet eacch other , found out he was my long lost brother <3

  • @deathnoteguy0 Woah.....

  • what! you shouldn't apologize for chancing, we all change all the time, and it would be unnatural if you didn't change. i like what you do now, as long as you also enjoy making it.

    sorry for cheesiness! i just don't like to se you being sorry for not being like yo where a year ago! :)

  • punch him in the dick with a brick? well you could do that or you could SLAP DAT BITCH IN THE FACE WITH A BRICK

  • How are your eyes so freakin blueee? Haha, they're amazing. :)

  • I laughed so hard at the Pluto part XD

  • I agree with you on the whole "Christmas shouldn't even really exist" thing. For that one day, everyone shows compassion and heart, but what happens after that? People are back to their old selfish, insincere ways..

  • The exact same thing happened to me about my step dad. But it was a really ugly Asian woman.

  • aww your apology made me wanna cry and be like its okay Matt :)

  • punch him in the dick with a brick and keep movin :)

    my new life motto

  • I dont have a butt :P

  • you need to make your hair look like it was in your earlier vids.

  • you are not swifty....

  • @VikingFatty BLASPHEMY!

  • @VikingFatty yeah he is dumbass

  • you should try to make a video without saying penis

  • I always watch the videos until the very end, im glad that I do XD

  • I've found the greatest defense against the penis punch

  • you smell like dodo

  • swifty!!! you have inspired me to make my own youtube channel where i can answer incredibly weird and stupid questions like you!! so i have to thank you for my youtube success(if it happens) so thanx!!!!! hey, can you send me your bizarre questions plz?? my emails kpscotti!mac.com, so if people are reading this YOU STALKERS!! send me your strange and bizarre questions. and swifty, what computer program do you use to edit your videos?

  • id bang a heinz 57. : D

  • i would cosplay as dark link hell yes!!!!

  • if having Ema Watson as a girlfriend is gay I totaly fuck butt naked guys in dark alleys

  • Must be high on life...

  • you sory for what ?? i love this show and you are good bro =)

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  • Punch him in da dick with a brick! That should be on a t-shirt

  • you're on the right track swifty :)

  • 3:29 I WHIP MY HAIR BACK AND FORTH

    I WHIP MY HAIR BACK AND FORTH

  • Punch him in the dick and keep on moving. The words that will get me through this break-up.

  • How old r u?O.o

  • @xXxEmoGirl149xXx hes 23 i believe :)

  • 4:15... "WHERE DO I BELONG?" ... you sound like the gingerbread man off shrek :D

  • swifty=GOD.

  • You look like Jesus in this video

  • I've watched all of your ask swiftys n I've never been disappointed and always laugh sooooo I wanted you to know that :)

  • - you were still outta focus after 3:15 .

  • maybe shes from bangkok

  • @mrmeekl24 eh oh! :o

  • @swiftkaratechop what do you mean?

  • @swiftkaratechop lets GO :D

  • what chu smokin' baby? XD

  • YOU SAID BLASPHEMY. It's my favorite word. One thousand points to Hufflepuff.<3

  • Swifty brightens my day. :D

  • What does your beard taste like?

  • i love your hair :)

  • this is the second Ask Swifty 48 lol

  • in the middle of the video i clicked subscribe and he was like YAAAAAY... glad i matter! :D

  • the 'i sit on you' bit at the end xDDD

  • When did u lose your virginity?

  • Holy fuck i havent seen swifty since EVAR! still the same lol

  • 5:07 duh....huh

  • awsome :L <3

  • @flybyboy77 stfu its awesome

  • I love it when Matt laughs:') and I still think he's funny as shit.

  • guess who isnt funny anymore?......

    Swifty.....

  • i tried to watch his videos but this sucks

  • Awww he got sentimental and then ruined the moment by saying "dicks". XD

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  • He's totally my spirit animal :)

    I LOVE YOU SWIFTY!

    just do what you can when it comes to videos and I'll be here to support you the whole way. DICKS!

  • i liked the video matt :)

  • Its all fun and games until someone gets a blow-dryer! Haha u nasty, u thought i waz gonna say blowjob didnt u 3:

  • honestly its like the old ones i love soo much! cant wait for another episode! :D

  • yea you better be sorry. hahaha jk. i love you man!!!

  • oh my god, i haven't watched an episode since the shane dawson episode. he looks so beautiful. fuuuuuuuuuck lol

  • Swifty! Would you be my dinosaur and travel to magical taco land with me ?! :D

  • i just been dealing with life to along with 7 billion other people who are also dealing with life ^ ^

  • Your eyes are soooooo fucking pretty!!!!!!!! gaaah!

  • So c: you should make a video without pants on.

    Buttt instead of focusing the video on your face. c;

    Focus it on your, uhh :x tummy.

    Yeahh.

  • swifty are you a virgin???

  • I thought that was really sweet you showed that person who needed moneys artwork.

    AWW :)

  • Bring back old ask swift intro!

  • will you bear the fruit of my womb?

  • Why so serious o.O and why dont you play League of Legends anymore ( even if you didnt accept my invites)

  • 5:50 - 6:36 is that emotional breakdown?

  • i think that in the future, you should take a random episode, like #3 or something and copy it word for word and see how many people notice...

  • I gave my first guitar away free. Still bad luck?

  • 'there's a key to success? this whole time i've just been trying to shove my penis into that lock...'

  • failed me..

  • The sky is blue because of the sun in our solar system

    Duh!

    The grass is green because its made out of green stuff

    du..huh?

    XD

  • <3

  • LAWL "im sorry if i have filled you and not made you happy"

  • fag

  • Why don't you accept my game requests in LoL D: It makes me so saddd :'( *Slender Dan* prease pray wiff me

  • Swifty.. you're just not used to your hair being so clean..

  • he got a lot cuter omg

  • oh my god swifty you're so awesome i love you!! XD you never fail to make me laugh <3

  • i love you... that is all

  • you remind me of my cousin damond WAY to much

  • Your profile anime guy looks like L from death note =_= shifty is shifty >_>!

  • LOOKS LIKE JACK SPARROW! x)

  • you look xD so high

  • You kinda look like Prince Caspian. 

  • swifty i love you your awesome my question is do you dye your hair or is it your natural hair color

  • you're from pluto cause your small ............nuff said

  • you have not failed meand your videos all=ways make my day<3 ^^

  • Awh Swifty, you definitely brighten my day :3

  • You look incredibly blitted.

  • Keep calm and watch askswifty!

  • You look frikken beautifull

  • Shit, I sold my first guitar:(

  • Dearest Swifty, if you were locked in a room with Lord Ghirahim (look him up if you have no idea who the fuck I'm talking about), what would you guys do?

  • You look like jesus

  • so what have we learned today?

    that i need to figure out what i am doing with my hair

    im a pritty princess

    GROW UP

    well im tyred of your poop ...

  • So punch them in the dick with a brick and keep on moving! lol, i love this video, it is my FAVOURITE! ;) love you swift (u smell like doo doo)<-(joke love you really) xxxxxx

  • this is crazy, this is crazy.

  • this one was actually funny!!! made my day! :D

    you figured out that the funny stuff doesn't come from making weird sounds and just reading the questions in weird voices, but also (especially) from making funny jokes, like.. with words LOL

  • Hey Swifty, do you like to measure strangers in public while they are Christmas shopping, film it and post them? ....ohh, it's just me? Oh wait, no, um, I don't do that at all or anything...