I love the story..i hope i can find someone here in the Philippines, because they are confused about there sexuality they calling themselves "bisexual" i really hate it! after having sex they gonna leave you alone just like nothing happens"a LOVE Game", all i wanted is Love and Friendship. :) no GAME...
I think Ms. Cho said it best, "I'm not bi, I'm I. I like people that like me." I'm so glad to see this type of thinking out in the world. It shouldn't be about what's between your legs or how much hair is on your face. If you truly like an INDIVIDUAL. What more is there to think about? Your story made my heart melt. I'm sorry it didn't work out though.
its good that i came across with YOUR videos..its Great!. i am in my 50's and I thought during this generation and being in a developed country, that you didn't experienced the 'cruelty' of COMING OUT.
Every person I find attractive I find hard to be myself around, I'm drawn to look at them and listen to them when I wouldn't put in effort with anyone else. So if someone was gay and I liked them and felt that attraction, its really hard not to think "I'm gay, your gay, I feel this amazing attraction for you, I want you" ... I really do want that relationship where we're good friends and it turns to something more, but its really hard to do that unless theyre smeone you dnt fancy from the start.
I'd definitely agree with your point raised there, gay people do tend to rush in to relationships, perhaps because they're worried subconsciously that they'd miss a chance and another gay guy won't come by? Years ago before I came out, I was friends with a girl for ages before we got together (we were together for three years too, we're best friends now) yet I feel if I came by another gay/bi guy that was like me I'd be interested before even getting close. *shrugs*
Well, he is so right! Even though I am a hetero girl, I know how stuff like this can ruin friendships.... Especcially if a gay guy uses you to hide (parents, friends...)
That's true. If a guy you know currently identifies as strait, just try to be friends with him and get to know him. When talking to him try to drop a few flirts in there to see how he responds. If he's not going for it he will usually laugh and say sorry but I'm just not into guys, However he may start flirting back. At this point you can make the first move or better yet, he will!
Some good advice given here. My tip, get to know them as a friend to the point where they trust you. You should be able to figure out if they're straight by then. If you're still having difficulty then (and this is the nerve-racking bit) ask them. Just be like "Hey, I'm not sure if I'm picking up on some vibe or something here, but are you gay?". If they're straight and worth anything as a person they'll politely say no. If they get mad then they're either closeted or not worth your time.
im not really too open with feelings and stuff so i just kinda hint at it and hope the guy gets it because im really bad with saying anything intimate =( damn shyness...
AWWWWWWWWW!!! Except for the ending, that was the CUTEST story I've ever heard from a gay guy ^_^ NO ONE ever has that! Or at least, no one I know... maybe that'll happen to me someday ^_^
Good story. :P I've had that happen once... Kind of embarassing, but it turned out okay. He was straight, unfortunately, but we became better friends.
Sometimes i really wish there was some kind of simple, well known system for people who wanted to openly express their sexuality in order to attract people and to find people, like a system of colours in the form of handkerchiefs, bracelets, any kind of accessories. but in someway that would prevent people who don't know the code from expressing to others by accident. if only !
This is exactly what i plan on doing with my insane crush, trying to become friends with him, and see what goes on from there. I have noticed a lot of signs that point him to being gay, but becoming friends with him would be exceptional.
Shakira and I would call that guy.... a shewolf! Britney Spears and I would say he is TOXIC! Adele and I would command you to set fire to the rain... over his yard! Katy Perry and I would say he is Hot and he's cold, he's yes and he's no. He's up and he's down! etc... gggrrr... that loserbutt! Yes... I went there!
Wow. That sucks. The guy left you..That's why I wouldn't date a bisexual woman. They don't know what they want and they could leave their female partner for a male.
@maria17954 I know you made this comment a month ago, but I had to reply because it irritated me. Just because a girl is bisexual, doesn't mean she doesn't know what she wants. I'm a bisexual girl, but crushes don't change any easier from female to male than they do male to male or female to female. We're not "confused" or "don't know what we want", we just like both genders equally. Being bisexual isn't any different than being gay.
@OOOOOOOOOOOOOm Please, stop finding justifications for being "bisexual". We all know they are all confused. You choose between men and women, but no, some decide to live the best of both worlds.
@maria17954 We don't all know bisexuals are confused, we all know you're an idiot for thinking so. I have a friend who's bisexual and has been dating the same guy for two years and they're a great couple who are going to have a wonderful life together. Does that sound confused to you? And I know someone else who is bisexual but has been happily married for several years. That's not confused. Know what makes me bisexual? I've never cared about gender. I don't care if you have boobs,
@maria17954 a penis, both, or neither. I'm not confused. I know what I want. I know what I don't. I know what I don't want is people telling me who I am and who I can't be. And I REALLY don't want you telling me that a few friends of mine and I are confused. Because you're wrong. You're confused about what bisexuality really means. It means you're being who you are, just like any one else. There's plenty of het- and homosexuals that actually ARE confused, but you only blame us.
@OOOOOOOOOOOOOm PLEASE, DON'T GET ALL HURT ABOUT THIS. SHIT, all you bisexuals are always ready to attack. I am not here to start a lame argument over bisexual's state of confusion. You are all getting butt hurt about every comment a person says about you being confused. No matter how much you argue and rant, I WILL STILL BELIEVE THAT BISEXUALS ARE CONFOUNDED BEINGS.
@maria17954 Trying to balance raising a friend's self-esteem and replying to you I accidentally clicked like instead of reply, so don't think anybody's actually on your side. And I'm ready to attack, because you're attacking me and my friends. And just because you think we're confused, doesn't mean we are. What evidence do you have to prove it? And if you're going to leave a comment, be prepared for someone to reply. So don't blame me, blame yourself. I don't need help. YOU DO.
@maria17954 I don't need help. Go fuck YOURself. And you're lesbian aren't you? Or at least support homosexuals. That means you either are or support queers. So, queer isn't really an insult. Even if you were homophobic I wouldn't take offense to it, so I really don't understand why you used that as insult over every other insult in the world.
@maria17954 Funny how you lesbians bitch about your rights more than anyone else but still reserve the right to bash on gay men. I mean, are you bashing on gay men to try to convince yourselves in your fantasy land that this behavior gives you an imaginary penis? Do the world a favor and go get some professional help.
@OhHeyLife105 That is so true. There is this guy im crushing on and i have been for the past... 3 years and i just have to ignore my feelings for him because i know it will never happen but my feelings wont let him go..i think about him all the time..we still text everyday and i cant help but be "different" when we talk...
Sometimes you get a feeling, but there are no foolproof signs. Be a friend without ulterior motive, a friend can then ask or learn more. I had a "thing" with a straight guy, greatest love of my life (so far) but in the end it did not work out and I was devastated. I did the only thing I could, I learned what there was to be learned and moved on but the scar is permanent. Friendships need to be treated carefully.
very useful, thanks (: My opinion, I shall say, it is better to be friends first get to know each other. But sometimes the best choice would be to just ask first if he's gay or not, because if you befriend the guy and suddenly you come up with the question to him... you might ruin the friendship, and what's worst, that you may have fall in love already. Its quite contradicting but I love being gay and I'm proud of it
@deshonster Oh, thanks :). Hmm, no, it hasn't, but I haven't come out to that many people, unfortunately. But I guess I know what you're saying. Like once we've had a debate in Grammar class over controversial topics (including homosexual marriage), so I have an idea what my classmates consider as "average gay". They're quite accepting, but they're heavily influenced by the stereotypes, as I saw.
I have to tell you that I'm 56 and from a different era when the cop used to harass us leaving the clubs. There was a cage at the door to prevent haters from coming in to beat the crap outa us. This warped my self esteem and my feelings toward other gay men. I have been celibate for 17 years. But now, finally I have met someone who I have a "crush" on. And I'm a mess over it. However your video's give me direction and confidence that I'm not doomed to be alone for the rest of my life. Thank you
Luv the vid!!! I have had some really good friends who were str8 over the years. Some ended up a litlle more than friends and some have not. I believe that we should just cherish the friendship for what it is. Sharing life with each other no matter what sexual preference we have. At the end of our lives all we have is the legacy we leave behind. Part of that legacy is the memories and love we had with our friends and family. How will they remember? I hope when they remember they see my heart.
My best friend came out as gay to me, and he ran off before I could say a word. I'm careful about hiding my sexuality, he was shocked to being speechless when next day I told him I was, too :D. He said I put up such a "straight act" he would've never guessed. But you know, it's just how I am. I don't understand what induces in some gays that they really act out the whore the homophobe world presents us as.
Maybe it's just me and i seriously don't know how to tell the gays apart . . . but i would have never thought of you to be gay . . . you look pretty straight to me. As lame as this sounds i've always wanted to have a gay friend but ive never come to know anyone who is openly gay . . . my friends tell me they make the greatest friends, . . for girls anyway :)
Can't do anything but agree with you, been in the same situations many of times and had my heart ending up the same way. But I loved/love it each time :D
second thing... u r damn right... i just noticed that when gays look at other guys they just keep on wondering whether they r gay or not... but we gays dont ask ourselves whether we will like his personality at first place or not... or whether he will like us or not :S
so yes... i back u up... everything u said is right... :D
how do you make love with boys ? i was wondering if you could telle us more about that especially about pleasure is it the same as when you made love with girls ( you said on one of your video that you had got a girlfriend , i want to know :) ) thanks in advance :)
i think this kind of story happens to every gay guy! at least happened to me. exactly the same. friend's friend first, then my friend, then my best f, then kiss, then sleep together. then! he gets a girlfriend and doesn't talk 2 me anymore.
your doing great dude and i truly think that you are making a difference in the "straight and gay world" and helping everyone who watches your videos no matter how old they are or color or gender and well basically im trying to say keep up the great awesome work and good luck in life and that well your kinda my hero now lol so thanks.........^.^ !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!XD beast lol
I think this highlights how it is STILL seen as somehow offensive to ask some-1 if they're gay! You know,I would never find it offensive if some-1 were to ask me,"Are you straight?" When people say there's not so much a stigma to being gay anymore,it makes me smile at their naievity.! If that were true we'd be able to pose that question without fear of rebuke,at best,& abuse at worst!
I have just come across your videos and I think that your are effectively providing criticisms and insight which can be deemed as useful. in other words, your doing a good job!
That was some good ask advice i look for signs all the time but that doeant help because at the end of the day all i have are signs now im am going to look behind that thanks.
If we were to "wear" something it would be like Jews who had to wear the star of David. But I would wear it if it meant being easier to meet other gays.
my younger brother is gay...i really wish he were like you. i find it admirable that you are able to answer, quite literally, every question there can be. also, the way you dispel the myths about homosexuality is amazing. i wish there were more people like you! kepp up the good work!
I really do like this video I've never commented on any YouTube videos before so ur my first and I just wanted to say I think ur doing a wonderful job at bringing topics to life in ur videos and u r an excellent person for wat ur doing
That must have been awful for you though. I'm always afraid of that happening. Cross the line with someone and then not being able to get back that great friendship if it doesn't work out.
during oscar wilde's time gay men wore a green carnation in thier lapel as a secret code....of course homosexuality was illegal so u couldnt come out...
I LOVE THIS VIDEO! this is just what i needed right now. thank you so much for giving advice like this. as an out gay teen in a southern suburb, any gay advice is much sought after! thank you so much!
Each person exchanges gifts of life experience and the cycle never ends because all is as it should be. Pioneers we are in moving life forward and knowledge that we are all aware of all experience and share the same life force....
love peace happiness and enjoy your life experiences.
Just seen a couple of your vids... Very good, but I find people who are gay try to label themselves and others just as was done before 60's Quinten and Dear old Mr Wild.
I have personaly found that life can surprise you with the very unexpected situations from school college and in working life. All experience that comes into your life is to be savoured and cannot come into your life without your permission or requesting of such experience, even the ones that are not so nice or injorous.
@Atomic440 man the same ting is happening to me in math class im crushing on one of the most beautiful persian guy ever or just beautiful guy ever. his muslim, and i came out 3 weeks ago. so he knows now, and then he starts talkin to me about some hot girl in class makes me so jealous, then he grabs my shoulders and smirts and me, and he seems so laid back with me, his gorgeous, and i dont know he dont seem very interested in her even though, he says shes hot.
Thanks for sharing us your story, the way it had to end was sad, but I couldn't agree more with the point you were making through it. After all, any relationship can be precious and valuable, so just get to know someone and see where it leads. That's how I feel.
This is exactly what happened to me recently... minus the physical part.
We became best friends in mere weeks, he always expressed interest in doing things with me, we went to two concerts together (Cyndi Lauper and Lady GaGa), and then we just split apart. He's gone back to his life of jumping between girlfriends and I'm calling him my ex-half-boyfriend.
Surely they just give you a 'look' just like in the straight communities.Believe me it can be just as difficult reading the signals in the heterosexual world.
I'm 18 and I'm gay but some people are like, "Dude you're not even 21 are you rly sure you're gay?" Just wondering: Do you rly need an age for you to be gay? I mean like I've known I'm gay since I've started crushing on a guyfriend when i was like 10. And anthr thing: Is it normal 4 a gay guy to be less sexually active + looking for love instead of just sex? I mean there're just too many gay guys out there who would rather commit to sex than to a rls. Btw cool videos i just subscribed to you :)
@sexymiyoki he chose to sublimate his homosexual feelings into what seemed to be a less frightening ie more widely accepted and understood sexual arena which is still to my knowledge the heterosexual playing/mating field for humans.
@workyourblondexo I don't consider that lucky at all, the guy basically got trolled. HE hangs with a dude, the dudes gives him extra attention and acts attracted towards him, and after finally coming out to you, he gets a girlfriend only a week later. That sounds pretty disheartening to me. But I mean if you're one of those gays that just want sex I guess thats cool, but I've been in Couver87's position before and it sucks caring for someone who is sexually confused.
@LZ11271978 no im not a promiscuous gay whos only after sex... hes not lucky he got played hes lucky he had the guy he wanted even just for a little whileee
What I want to say is: if you´re interested in someone but not sure of the other person´s orientation- approach BUT don´t stalk! Pay attention to the signs, if he/ she doesn´t talk back when u say something, behaves normally in your presence, doesn´t call you, there´s no physical approach, etc, then u know there´s no chance. Analyse the eye contact, if he/ she acts in a caring way towards u, wants to be with u all the time, laughs a lot near you, tries to look pretty, then you´re lucky.
Hi. One´s sexual orientation isn´t always obvious. U reminded me of a situation I went through when I attended University. There was a lesbian trying to get close to me in a weird way. She was stalking me all over the campus, saying "If u need ANYTHING I´m here for u", staring at me in class, asking me out on a dinner, etc. She was creeping me out. I´m a bisexual but I don´t flaunt it and, most importantly I wasn´t interested and tried to show her it clearly; without confronting the girl.
I agree with everything you said. I've had lots of crushes. I'm fortunate to know so many people, gay and straight who don't have any problems with my sexuality. There is one guy in particular...........................
I had the same experience as you. This guy claims that he loves me and would ask me to be together with him from time to time. I don't really like him a first find him a bit of a nuisance and all, as he will tease me every time. Well, sigh...this thing didn't last long. In the end, we end up not talking to each other anymore. I know how feel about it. Thats actually quite a very sad thing. )):
I think that gay guys kind of can tell if another guy is gay, or at least have a strong sense of it. I think its natural that single people, consciously or subconsciously, interact with people according to whether they're a friend, or a potential lover, and what degree of attraction there is; it affects how guys interact with girls, and vice versa, and its not wrong or unusual that gay guys do it as well.
your hair, how you move around, hand jestures immediately made me think you are gay. Which you admit.
Its about time gay people should be able to immediately admit they are gay, and have the other person - if their strf8 simply say - hey thats ok. Love you just as you are.
Your maturity and very sweet sense of relationships make your advice so appealing.
Straights and gays have sex in the bathrooms at clubs, alleys, cars, etc. Thirty minutes of dancing or talking and BANG, the deed is done and both move on. Just 'sex' takes a few minutes to get into and out of, while sex in relationship of any kind takes a while to build up to, and a while to get over if goes badly ... or ends, as yours did. It's SO worth it though, and I wish more knew that!
I absolutely love your videos! They address every general question I have ever had about my sexuality. Living in a house with a homophobic bro and dad (and being in the closet) really sucks, and it's nice to be able to see that there are other people like me out there. Keep em coming cutie!
swedish peaple is the hotest, trust me i now hahah xD dame i´m boring, but nice story, and allot of youtubers have bine talking about how hot swedish boy´s are and howe nice ower country is to day, prowed swed :)
You are a smart dude. I feel like it took me forever to figure things out like this, lol. But I would have to say the figure out if you like them as a person first is a golden piece of advice.
o man the same thing happened to me.. at first i found this guy ugly.. then i became friends with him and started liking him a lot. then i told him and we stopped being friends..
one sign is the type of music you listen to...i know my friends figure out that im gay when they get into my iPod haha well i do have britney, madonna, lady gaga, ""adam lambert"" haha my friend saw ricky martin in it and said i knew you were gay haha but also in the way people walk i call it the gay walk haha listen to peoples iPods people!!!! QUESTION!!! CAN YOU BE OUT WHEN ONLY A FEW PEOPLE KNOW...?
this is why I hesitate when I have a crush on a straight or "?" sexuality guy... I'm afraid not getting hurt... But I will never know till I tell him.. and it's easy to tell him since he knows my sexuality... but when knowing he is straight.... I really die inside and don't know what to do... I don't think the friendship is about to be ruined if I let him know...
Not all gay people live a certain type of lifestyle. Some people only identify themselves as gay in the sense that they like the same sex and nothing more. I guess the best way to find out is just engage the person as a friend first, see where it goes from there as friends. If that person doesn't give you any hints or subliminal messages, well it might be obvious after awhile.
U know what. Men have been having sex with other men since the greeks. I think it is natural for some. i am straight. i dont care about gays one way or another. I bet tho deep down inside u wanna have some good hard sex with a busty chick tho!
but the girlfriend part bothered me. I don't know about you, but I, as a lesbian, get very angry when I break up with a girl and she ends up with a guy. I am still not certain on my view of bisexuality, but I feel as if she was just using me, experimenting with me, fooling me, etc. I feel like I am inching towards creating a barrier for myself for dating bisexuals because I become really hurt when they end up with a man, or I get really jealous. Did you ever feel this way?
I love the story..i hope i can find someone here in the Philippines, because they are confused about there sexuality they calling themselves "bisexual" i really hate it! after having sex they gonna leave you alone just like nothing happens"a LOVE Game", all i wanted is Love and Friendship. :) no GAME...
rhamire05 1 month ago
your amazing i just love hering your storys :)
TheJustinbitch 1 month ago
I see you videos and it's like your telling my life. I love your advices.
marmorac2 1 month ago
That is solid advice.
bacongin 1 month ago
Love the anecdote to the question!!!
MichaelDavidson16 1 month ago
I think Ms. Cho said it best, "I'm not bi, I'm I. I like people that like me." I'm so glad to see this type of thinking out in the world. It shouldn't be about what's between your legs or how much hair is on your face. If you truly like an INDIVIDUAL. What more is there to think about? Your story made my heart melt. I'm sorry it didn't work out though.
UZERSable 1 month ago
WOW Well said! Thanks. Def helped me!
MWILDMAN 2 months ago
Thanks for sharing, It really helped me :D
MyJZam 2 months ago
Its his loss. He lost someone who is not only externally but internally beautiful.Plus you are cute
LeContrabass 2 months ago
its good that i came across with YOUR videos..its Great!. i am in my 50's and I thought during this generation and being in a developed country, that you didn't experienced the 'cruelty' of COMING OUT.
gaybigan 2 months ago
I think you couldn't be boring even if you tried ^^
Mikel683 2 months ago
Every person I find attractive I find hard to be myself around, I'm drawn to look at them and listen to them when I wouldn't put in effort with anyone else. So if someone was gay and I liked them and felt that attraction, its really hard not to think "I'm gay, your gay, I feel this amazing attraction for you, I want you" ... I really do want that relationship where we're good friends and it turns to something more, but its really hard to do that unless theyre smeone you dnt fancy from the start.
FinalFantasyXPro 2 months ago
youre cute!
h34rt19 2 months ago
I'd definitely agree with your point raised there, gay people do tend to rush in to relationships, perhaps because they're worried subconsciously that they'd miss a chance and another gay guy won't come by? Years ago before I came out, I was friends with a girl for ages before we got together (we were together for three years too, we're best friends now) yet I feel if I came by another gay/bi guy that was like me I'd be interested before even getting close. *shrugs*
Toadsanime 3 months ago
Well, he is so right! Even though I am a hetero girl, I know how stuff like this can ruin friendships.... Especcially if a gay guy uses you to hide (parents, friends...)
tineeeable 3 months ago
That's true. If a guy you know currently identifies as strait, just try to be friends with him and get to know him. When talking to him try to drop a few flirts in there to see how he responds. If he's not going for it he will usually laugh and say sorry but I'm just not into guys, However he may start flirting back. At this point you can make the first move or better yet, he will!
Xcorgi 3 months ago
That was a good, somewhat sad story....I used to have a crush on a foreign exchange student but he was gay, just European :'(
yippedoodah 4 months ago
Some good advice given here. My tip, get to know them as a friend to the point where they trust you. You should be able to figure out if they're straight by then. If you're still having difficulty then (and this is the nerve-racking bit) ask them. Just be like "Hey, I'm not sure if I'm picking up on some vibe or something here, but are you gay?". If they're straight and worth anything as a person they'll politely say no. If they get mad then they're either closeted or not worth your time.
psped7529104 5 months ago
Maybe he was under the influence of alcohol... its possible
sheaofleaves124 5 months ago
Sounded like such a sweet story until you said he got a girlfriend after a week :(
MichelleRitsuko 5 months ago
im not really too open with feelings and stuff so i just kinda hint at it and hope the guy gets it because im really bad with saying anything intimate =( damn shyness...
XsenHellion 5 months ago
march 13 is my birthday.....
agoraki4everything 5 months ago
AWWWWWWWWW!!! Except for the ending, that was the CUTEST story I've ever heard from a gay guy ^_^ NO ONE ever has that! Or at least, no one I know... maybe that'll happen to me someday ^_^
gowagreg924 6 months ago
YOUR HOT! (jizzes in pants )
Number1Hipster 6 months ago
Amazing vid! Thanks for posting this. You are awesome! I wish you all the best. Peace, love and respect.
effmeelsetosay 6 months ago
Good story. :P I've had that happen once... Kind of embarassing, but it turned out okay. He was straight, unfortunately, but we became better friends.
BlackDawning 6 months ago
That is so embarrassing, him wanting to kiss you. I think he just wanted to be your friend, and confused you with being a woman.
BarriosGroupie 6 months ago
Sometimes i really wish there was some kind of simple, well known system for people who wanted to openly express their sexuality in order to attract people and to find people, like a system of colours in the form of handkerchiefs, bracelets, any kind of accessories. but in someway that would prevent people who don't know the code from expressing to others by accident. if only !
tragicallyx3perfect 6 months ago
This is exactly what i plan on doing with my insane crush, trying to become friends with him, and see what goes on from there. I have noticed a lot of signs that point him to being gay, but becoming friends with him would be exceptional.
Thegayweatherguy 7 months ago
you handled that tricky question perfectly. it is always nice to hear another strong, positive voice in the gay community. keep posting !
lereclusebrun 7 months ago
March 13th is my birthday.............!!!
agoraki4everything 7 months ago
Shakira and I would call that guy.... a shewolf! Britney Spears and I would say he is TOXIC! Adele and I would command you to set fire to the rain... over his yard! Katy Perry and I would say he is Hot and he's cold, he's yes and he's no. He's up and he's down! etc... gggrrr... that loserbutt! Yes... I went there!
DavidZorkboy 7 months ago
Wow. That sucks. The guy left you..That's why I wouldn't date a bisexual woman. They don't know what they want and they could leave their female partner for a male.
maria17954 7 months ago
@maria17954 I know you made this comment a month ago, but I had to reply because it irritated me. Just because a girl is bisexual, doesn't mean she doesn't know what she wants. I'm a bisexual girl, but crushes don't change any easier from female to male than they do male to male or female to female. We're not "confused" or "don't know what we want", we just like both genders equally. Being bisexual isn't any different than being gay.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOm 6 months ago
@OOOOOOOOOOOOOm Please, stop finding justifications for being "bisexual". We all know they are all confused. You choose between men and women, but no, some decide to live the best of both worlds.
maria17954 6 months ago
@maria17954 We don't all know bisexuals are confused, we all know you're an idiot for thinking so. I have a friend who's bisexual and has been dating the same guy for two years and they're a great couple who are going to have a wonderful life together. Does that sound confused to you? And I know someone else who is bisexual but has been happily married for several years. That's not confused. Know what makes me bisexual? I've never cared about gender. I don't care if you have boobs,
OOOOOOOOOOOOOm 6 months ago
@OOOOOOOOOOOOOm NO. YOU. DON'T KNOW.WHAT.YOU.WANT. YOU NEED HELP.
maria17954 6 months ago
@maria17954 a penis, both, or neither. I'm not confused. I know what I want. I know what I don't. I know what I don't want is people telling me who I am and who I can't be. And I REALLY don't want you telling me that a few friends of mine and I are confused. Because you're wrong. You're confused about what bisexuality really means. It means you're being who you are, just like any one else. There's plenty of het- and homosexuals that actually ARE confused, but you only blame us.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOm 6 months ago
@OOOOOOOOOOOOOm PLEASE, DON'T GET ALL HURT ABOUT THIS. SHIT, all you bisexuals are always ready to attack. I am not here to start a lame argument over bisexual's state of confusion. You are all getting butt hurt about every comment a person says about you being confused. No matter how much you argue and rant, I WILL STILL BELIEVE THAT BISEXUALS ARE CONFOUNDED BEINGS.
maria17954 6 months ago
@maria17954 Trying to balance raising a friend's self-esteem and replying to you I accidentally clicked like instead of reply, so don't think anybody's actually on your side. And I'm ready to attack, because you're attacking me and my friends. And just because you think we're confused, doesn't mean we are. What evidence do you have to prove it? And if you're going to leave a comment, be prepared for someone to reply. So don't blame me, blame yourself. I don't need help. YOU DO.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOm 6 months ago
@OOOOOOOOOOOOOm YOU NEED FUCKIN HELP. GO FUCK YOURSELF FUCKIN QUEER.
maria17954 5 months ago
@maria17954 I don't need help. Go fuck YOURself. And you're lesbian aren't you? Or at least support homosexuals. That means you either are or support queers. So, queer isn't really an insult. Even if you were homophobic I wouldn't take offense to it, so I really don't understand why you used that as insult over every other insult in the world.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOm 5 months ago
@maria17954 Funny how you lesbians bitch about your rights more than anyone else but still reserve the right to bash on gay men. I mean, are you bashing on gay men to try to convince yourselves in your fantasy land that this behavior gives you an imaginary penis? Do the world a favor and go get some professional help.
Xcorgi 3 months ago
@maria17954 Homosexuals coul leave you for a female.... Would you feel better?
tineeeable 3 months ago
Your videos are very informative, thank you.
zeitgeist129 7 months ago
Ive been there a few times & its the worst.
RedLantern1000 7 months ago
@OhHeyLife105 That is so true. There is this guy im crushing on and i have been for the past... 3 years and i just have to ignore my feelings for him because i know it will never happen but my feelings wont let him go..i think about him all the time..we still text everyday and i cant help but be "different" when we talk...
DanZyG6 8 months ago
I just cry at the end of the video
because that's EXACTLY what I've been thru
:'(
Szophyas 8 months ago
Me sorry :( That musta been hard for ya.
J9L9C 8 months ago
@OhHeyLife105 amen man you said it exactly the way i feel!
adamlovesbmws 8 months ago
Sometimes you get a feeling, but there are no foolproof signs. Be a friend without ulterior motive, a friend can then ask or learn more. I had a "thing" with a straight guy, greatest love of my life (so far) but in the end it did not work out and I was devastated. I did the only thing I could, I learned what there was to be learned and moved on but the scar is permanent. Friendships need to be treated carefully.
ctp2067 8 months ago
very useful, thanks (: My opinion, I shall say, it is better to be friends first get to know each other. But sometimes the best choice would be to just ask first if he's gay or not, because if you befriend the guy and suddenly you come up with the question to him... you might ruin the friendship, and what's worst, that you may have fall in love already. Its quite contradicting but I love being gay and I'm proud of it
TheCharlesWinston 9 months ago
omg i Love you !!
ferch61 9 months ago
@deshonster Oh, thanks :). Hmm, no, it hasn't, but I haven't come out to that many people, unfortunately. But I guess I know what you're saying. Like once we've had a debate in Grammar class over controversial topics (including homosexual marriage), so I have an idea what my classmates consider as "average gay". They're quite accepting, but they're heavily influenced by the stereotypes, as I saw.
kalacs32 9 months ago
I have to tell you that I'm 56 and from a different era when the cop used to harass us leaving the clubs. There was a cage at the door to prevent haters from coming in to beat the crap outa us. This warped my self esteem and my feelings toward other gay men. I have been celibate for 17 years. But now, finally I have met someone who I have a "crush" on. And I'm a mess over it. However your video's give me direction and confidence that I'm not doomed to be alone for the rest of my life. Thank you
me52 9 months ago
i think u look straight, and sound it.
raffawesomeness 9 months ago
I'm so upset for you and that guy, totally feel for you!
RoryAndrew 9 months ago
You are sooooooooo wise! I totally agree! Thank you soooo much.
sunflyer40 9 months ago 2
Luv the vid!!! I have had some really good friends who were str8 over the years. Some ended up a litlle more than friends and some have not. I believe that we should just cherish the friendship for what it is. Sharing life with each other no matter what sexual preference we have. At the end of our lives all we have is the legacy we leave behind. Part of that legacy is the memories and love we had with our friends and family. How will they remember? I hope when they remember they see my heart.
makiniturs 9 months ago
aww...that is so sad...
PoliMeim 9 months ago
My best friend came out as gay to me, and he ran off before I could say a word. I'm careful about hiding my sexuality, he was shocked to being speechless when next day I told him I was, too :D. He said I put up such a "straight act" he would've never guessed. But you know, it's just how I am. I don't understand what induces in some gays that they really act out the whore the homophobe world presents us as.
kalacs32 9 months ago
"Rate 5/5" - oh those were the days...
patyo1994 10 months ago
Maybe it's just me and i seriously don't know how to tell the gays apart . . . but i would have never thought of you to be gay . . . you look pretty straight to me. As lame as this sounds i've always wanted to have a gay friend but ive never come to know anyone who is openly gay . . . my friends tell me they make the greatest friends, . . for girls anyway :)
VTUL92 10 months ago
Can't do anything but agree with you, been in the same situations many of times and had my heart ending up the same way. But I loved/love it each time :D
Iaresnoutube 10 months ago
First thing... u r fucking hot :P
second thing... u r damn right... i just noticed that when gays look at other guys they just keep on wondering whether they r gay or not... but we gays dont ask ourselves whether we will like his personality at first place or not... or whether he will like us or not :S
so yes... i back u up... everything u said is right... :D
wsasxsds 10 months ago
The way you tell stories is so damn adorable <3
Todaydawg21 10 months ago
I want to applaud you for the advice you gave. This could have taken so many routes. I really feel like you're a good role model in general.
billwenham 10 months ago
how do you make love with boys ? i was wondering if you could telle us more about that especially about pleasure is it the same as when you made love with girls ( you said on one of your video that you had got a girlfriend , i want to know :) ) thanks in advance :)
toilahati 10 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
That was such a good answer!
paulsimonmou1 11 months ago
i think this kind of story happens to every gay guy! at least happened to me. exactly the same. friend's friend first, then my friend, then my best f, then kiss, then sleep together. then! he gets a girlfriend and doesn't talk 2 me anymore.
Damdamluv 11 months ago
My jaw dropped at 3:48 and remained there for about 30 seconds... love your videos!!
How do I send in questions....
HeWent2JaredAgain 11 months ago
you're a nice guy, i like you
inakicastro 11 months ago
Great. Articulate and intelligent commentary. It helps a bit that I agree with you 100%!
Hijodelaisla 11 months ago
I love yhur video!!!
syfer3156 11 months ago
I'm jealous about everything that was said in this video -_-
shadowfrost91 11 months ago
Great story!
RoamingD 1 year ago
U don't boor
reinventnv 1 year ago
@Couver87 Poor Guy ... that sucks what happened to you :( hope u got all better
tommykrause1 1 year ago
your doing great dude and i truly think that you are making a difference in the "straight and gay world" and helping everyone who watches your videos no matter how old they are or color or gender and well basically im trying to say keep up the great awesome work and good luck in life and that well your kinda my hero now lol so thanks.........^.^ !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!XD beast lol
sirlordofcuteness1 1 year ago
The gay/bi/straight labels just get in the way of seeing people as people and taking it from there. Great story; thank you for sharing.
davedell1950 1 year ago
I think this highlights how it is STILL seen as somehow offensive to ask some-1 if they're gay! You know,I would never find it offensive if some-1 were to ask me,"Are you straight?" When people say there's not so much a stigma to being gay anymore,it makes me smile at their naievity.! If that were true we'd be able to pose that question without fear of rebuke,at best,& abuse at worst!
popazz1 1 year ago
Maybe he was bisexual.
tripeandbean 1 year ago
GAWD! That guy is so lucky to have kissed you and done "a little more then that too" I'm melting with jealousyyy -_-
XD <3
FightingZerk 1 year ago
there are no tell tale signs...
wtf? my bf and I both act like men and get hit on all the time because chicks think we are best friends... this is pure bullshit...
except for the friends first aspect of it...
there are a lot of masculine gay men....
9436oelable 1 year ago
I find that dudes I argue and disagree with the most often end up being the dudes I end up together with...
9436oelable 1 year ago
@9436oelable That is SO true and has been my experience many times! At first I just thought it was weird and then it became predictable.
davedell1950 1 year ago
great advice so true =)
UrDaiLyH311 1 year ago
Wow, you're an amazing guy and you didn't deserve what that dude did.
ChrizL7 1 year ago
If a guy has a girlfriend, that doesn't automatically make him straight ;)
CrazyRsQuester 1 year ago 3
omg this happened to me 2!!!
sillybilly551 1 year ago
OMG you're so adorable, and you kinda look like Ben affleck. I don't have a question for you right now, but when I do I'll ask it :)
BogusMonkey231 1 year ago
I have just come across your videos and I think that your are effectively providing criticisms and insight which can be deemed as useful. in other words, your doing a good job!
iceteadd 1 year ago
That was some good ask advice i look for signs all the time but that doeant help because at the end of the day all i have are signs now im am going to look behind that thanks.
P.s, you are really cute lol
ZTBartie 1 year ago
how insightful. thanks so much for posting these videos!! LOVE YOURSELVES my gay brothers and sisters....GAY PRIDE. :)
Crealosa 1 year ago
Great advice
GetTheHook 1 year ago
If we were to "wear" something it would be like Jews who had to wear the star of David. But I would wear it if it meant being easier to meet other gays.
riegjd2110 1 year ago
my younger brother is gay...i really wish he were like you. i find it admirable that you are able to answer, quite literally, every question there can be. also, the way you dispel the myths about homosexuality is amazing. i wish there were more people like you! kepp up the good work!
jtomcheck1 1 year ago
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Treblinka2012 1 year ago
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nexttsar 1 year ago
I really do like this video I've never commented on any YouTube videos before so ur my first and I just wanted to say I think ur doing a wonderful job at bringing topics to life in ur videos and u r an excellent person for wat ur doing
XoXo gabriel
gabefamous 1 year ago
@ANIMALcop0403 are you gay?
xXTiramisuuuXx 1 year ago
Great story! I really enjoyed it :)
That must have been awful for you though. I'm always afraid of that happening. Cross the line with someone and then not being able to get back that great friendship if it doesn't work out.
Valcuric 1 year ago
during oscar wilde's time gay men wore a green carnation in thier lapel as a secret code....of course homosexuality was illegal so u couldnt come out...
ps i would give u extra attention too
afboyfw 1 year ago
during oscar wilde's time gay men wore a green carnation in thier lapel as a secret code....of course homosexuality was illegal so u couldnt come out
afboyfw 1 year ago
You're really sweet.
oceanwonders 1 year ago
you're like my therapist... lol!
beto2u 1 year ago 75
@beto2u lol he is for me two lol i find rainbow wear helps but alot a guys wear it to
Dragon27488 1 year ago
I LOVE THIS VIDEO! this is just what i needed right now. thank you so much for giving advice like this. as an out gay teen in a southern suburb, any gay advice is much sought after! thank you so much!
bubbafatismycat 1 year ago
Each person exchanges gifts of life experience and the cycle never ends because all is as it should be. Pioneers we are in moving life forward and knowledge that we are all aware of all experience and share the same life force....
love peace happiness and enjoy your life experiences.
LukeNGood369 1 year ago
Just seen a couple of your vids... Very good, but I find people who are gay try to label themselves and others just as was done before 60's Quinten and Dear old Mr Wild.
I have personaly found that life can surprise you with the very unexpected situations from school college and in working life. All experience that comes into your life is to be savoured and cannot come into your life without your permission or requesting of such experience, even the ones that are not so nice or injorous.
LukeNGood369 1 year ago
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Atomic440 1 year ago
@Atomic440 man the same ting is happening to me in math class im crushing on one of the most beautiful persian guy ever or just beautiful guy ever. his muslim, and i came out 3 weeks ago. so he knows now, and then he starts talkin to me about some hot girl in class makes me so jealous, then he grabs my shoulders and smirts and me, and he seems so laid back with me, his gorgeous, and i dont know he dont seem very interested in her even though, he says shes hot.
Xsonelexi 1 year ago
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Atomic440 1 year ago
@Atomic440 I bet every gay person experiences this same problem.
DMoD129 1 year ago
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Atomic440 1 year ago
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Atomic440 1 year ago
Great story and a great anwser too xx
DarkZener 1 year ago
Great answer!
You sure you don't have a PhD in this field?
digitalkaos2374 1 year ago
YOUR DOOING AWESOME. :))) i really am in love with the topics
getrealfan1 1 year ago
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww D: i was tearing up at the end. that was beautiful.
sasukeichigo12 1 year ago
Thanks for sharing us your story, the way it had to end was sad, but I couldn't agree more with the point you were making through it. After all, any relationship can be precious and valuable, so just get to know someone and see where it leads. That's how I feel.
Snufkin999 1 year ago
Omg...I wish I was a guy..So I could be gay.
Mew59 1 year ago
This is exactly what happened to me recently... minus the physical part.
We became best friends in mere weeks, he always expressed interest in doing things with me, we went to two concerts together (Cyndi Lauper and Lady GaGa), and then we just split apart. He's gone back to his life of jumping between girlfriends and I'm calling him my ex-half-boyfriend.
LocksAndChains 1 year ago
did you guys ever become friends again?
dgaller06 1 year ago
Surely they just give you a 'look' just like in the straight communities.Believe me it can be just as difficult reading the signals in the heterosexual world.
Quest4gnosis 1 year ago
I'm 18 and I'm gay but some people are like, "Dude you're not even 21 are you rly sure you're gay?" Just wondering: Do you rly need an age for you to be gay? I mean like I've known I'm gay since I've started crushing on a guyfriend when i was like 10. And anthr thing: Is it normal 4 a gay guy to be less sexually active + looking for love instead of just sex? I mean there're just too many gay guys out there who would rather commit to sex than to a rls. Btw cool videos i just subscribed to you :)
blaqueblack 1 year ago
It's hard to believe it only took you 2 weeks to get over being dumped. I would have been devastated. Btw, I think all your vids are great!
weathersaoysius 1 year ago
HE GOT A GIRLFRIEND, WTF?
sexymiyoki 1 year ago
@sexymiyoki he chose to sublimate his homosexual feelings into what seemed to be a less frightening ie more widely accepted and understood sexual arena which is still to my knowledge the heterosexual playing/mating field for humans.
Quest4gnosis 1 year ago
i really like this video. jonh ur the best ;)
jorgeperez305 1 year ago
he got a girlfriend! that sucks lol
sheiladin 1 year ago
i always have curshes on my straight guy friends, neverrr got as lucky as you, lucky bitch
workyourblondexo 1 year ago
@workyourblondexo I don't consider that lucky at all, the guy basically got trolled. HE hangs with a dude, the dudes gives him extra attention and acts attracted towards him, and after finally coming out to you, he gets a girlfriend only a week later. That sounds pretty disheartening to me. But I mean if you're one of those gays that just want sex I guess thats cool, but I've been in Couver87's position before and it sucks caring for someone who is sexually confused.
LZ11271978 1 year ago
@LZ11271978 no im not a promiscuous gay whos only after sex... hes not lucky he got played hes lucky he had the guy he wanted even just for a little whileee
workyourblondexo 1 year ago
@workyourblondexo that one way to look at it.
LZ11271978 1 year ago
What I want to say is: if you´re interested in someone but not sure of the other person´s orientation- approach BUT don´t stalk! Pay attention to the signs, if he/ she doesn´t talk back when u say something, behaves normally in your presence, doesn´t call you, there´s no physical approach, etc, then u know there´s no chance. Analyse the eye contact, if he/ she acts in a caring way towards u, wants to be with u all the time, laughs a lot near you, tries to look pretty, then you´re lucky.
Musyk1 1 year ago
Hi. One´s sexual orientation isn´t always obvious. U reminded me of a situation I went through when I attended University. There was a lesbian trying to get close to me in a weird way. She was stalking me all over the campus, saying "If u need ANYTHING I´m here for u", staring at me in class, asking me out on a dinner, etc. She was creeping me out. I´m a bisexual but I don´t flaunt it and, most importantly I wasn´t interested and tried to show her it clearly; without confronting the girl.
Musyk1 1 year ago
Your hair makes me happy.
JuzMe22 1 year ago
That was a great story, sorry things didn't work out though.
fatdudewh33lchair 1 year ago
I agree with everything you said. I've had lots of crushes. I'm fortunate to know so many people, gay and straight who don't have any problems with my sexuality. There is one guy in particular...........................
spunkysex 1 year ago
The "tell tale" signs of gays? Simply pretend to be a Christian and if he's incredibly friendly & tolerant... then he's definitely gay!
Chuichupachichi 1 year ago
I had the same experience as you. This guy claims that he loves me and would ask me to be together with him from time to time. I don't really like him a first find him a bit of a nuisance and all, as he will tease me every time. Well, sigh...this thing didn't last long. In the end, we end up not talking to each other anymore. I know how feel about it. Thats actually quite a very sad thing. )):
laoshulaohu 1 year ago
OMG THIS WAS ON MY BIRTHDAY!!!!! <3<3<3 i love your videos!!!!!!!!
cvzboii 1 year ago
@cvzboii SAME. haha.
aliG313 1 year ago
I think that gay guys kind of can tell if another guy is gay, or at least have a strong sense of it. I think its natural that single people, consciously or subconsciously, interact with people according to whether they're a friend, or a potential lover, and what degree of attraction there is; it affects how guys interact with girls, and vice versa, and its not wrong or unusual that gay guys do it as well.
disamjisa 1 year ago
your hair, how you move around, hand jestures immediately made me think you are gay. Which you admit.
Its about time gay people should be able to immediately admit they are gay, and have the other person - if their strf8 simply say - hey thats ok. Love you just as you are.
lookseeme21 1 year ago
Your maturity and very sweet sense of relationships make your advice so appealing.
Straights and gays have sex in the bathrooms at clubs, alleys, cars, etc. Thirty minutes of dancing or talking and BANG, the deed is done and both move on. Just 'sex' takes a few minutes to get into and out of, while sex in relationship of any kind takes a while to build up to, and a while to get over if goes badly ... or ends, as yours did. It's SO worth it though, and I wish more knew that!
justanote7 1 year ago
hey dude !!
such a wonderful and correct advice !!!! ... known each others first ... then think in a possible relationship !!!!
sancujezu 1 year ago
eh straights.. such a head ache no more lol.
jocovom 1 year ago
wow!
josephjardin 1 year ago
My Gaydar Is ALWAYS 1500% right. rofl I just always know, because i've been through everything, been there, dont that.
turtleshellshocker 1 year ago
I absolutely love your videos! They address every general question I have ever had about my sexuality. Living in a house with a homophobic bro and dad (and being in the closet) really sucks, and it's nice to be able to see that there are other people like me out there. Keep em coming cutie!
xtac18 1 year ago
swedish peaple is the hotest, trust me i now hahah xD dame i´m boring, but nice story, and allot of youtubers have bine talking about how hot swedish boy´s are and howe nice ower country is to day, prowed swed :)
nillan7nillan 1 year ago
You are a smart dude. I feel like it took me forever to figure things out like this, lol. But I would have to say the figure out if you like them as a person first is a golden piece of advice.
awesbtns 1 year ago
o man the same thing happened to me.. at first i found this guy ugly.. then i became friends with him and started liking him a lot. then i told him and we stopped being friends..
chadhill13 1 year ago
DAMN, the story was getting good then the sad face pops up.
slaughterxsandii 1 year ago
"And I became all hot and bothered..."
I became all hot and bothered when you said that! <3
AkwardMomentsXD37 1 year ago
you are cute :)
alexandrosp2 1 year ago
at 1:58 your eyes look like lady gaga's from bad romance !
ssj4vkk 1 year ago
i still think you are a bit retarded, but i really like this video, it was very moving. Thanks :-P
amatorynumber 1 year ago
one sign is the type of music you listen to...i know my friends figure out that im gay when they get into my iPod haha well i do have britney, madonna, lady gaga, ""adam lambert"" haha my friend saw ricky martin in it and said i knew you were gay haha but also in the way people walk i call it the gay walk haha listen to peoples iPods people!!!! QUESTION!!! CAN YOU BE OUT WHEN ONLY A FEW PEOPLE KNOW...?
martin09451 1 year ago
@martin09451 that's stereotypical and silly
amatorynumber 1 year ago
@martin09451 I listen to soundtracks, what does that make me?
FrederikundWilma 1 year ago
this is why I hesitate when I have a crush on a straight or "?" sexuality guy... I'm afraid not getting hurt... But I will never know till I tell him.. and it's easy to tell him since he knows my sexuality... but when knowing he is straight.... I really die inside and don't know what to do... I don't think the friendship is about to be ruined if I let him know...
(some comments/answers please?.. from anyone)
stathisl2 1 year ago
oh wow I want to decipher your sexuality
hugznotdrugs2 1 year ago
Not all gay people live a certain type of lifestyle. Some people only identify themselves as gay in the sense that they like the same sex and nothing more. I guess the best way to find out is just engage the person as a friend first, see where it goes from there as friends. If that person doesn't give you any hints or subliminal messages, well it might be obvious after awhile.
Jalpseon 1 year ago
U know what. Men have been having sex with other men since the greeks. I think it is natural for some. i am straight. i dont care about gays one way or another. I bet tho deep down inside u wanna have some good hard sex with a busty chick tho!
eastcoaster54 1 year ago
hey john, i think its easier if that person knew you are gay, but its hard if people dunno you are gay at first :S
konghung1234 1 year ago
I think you set yourself up to be "hurt", and rejected with the type of relationship you describe in this vid.
petitamipremier 1 year ago
holy shit that same thing happened to me but i was the one who ended getting a girl friend
ynewbee 1 year ago
Aw is all i can say:)
but the girlfriend part bothered me. I don't know about you, but I, as a lesbian, get very angry when I break up with a girl and she ends up with a guy. I am still not certain on my view of bisexuality, but I feel as if she was just using me, experimenting with me, fooling me, etc. I feel like I am inching towards creating a barrier for myself for dating bisexuals because I become really hurt when they end up with a man, or I get really jealous. Did you ever feel this way?
TeenageDeathGirl337 1 year ago