SMBC Theater - Children's Books

[septumis]

# strikes and I touch you on the penis

[cantinaphil]

This reminds me of "Cyanide and Happiness"

[zawmbees]

@cantinaphil Except this is funny.

[HSDclover]

i love how it is obviously weiner's drawings here. i kinda forgot about his webcomic while watching these (which is weird, i read it earlier today)

[MadeOfCATS]

These would actually make a very good series of adult novels

[Trepur349]

I want to read those books lol

[AboyNAmEDsued]

I like my children's books like I like my masturbation. Short, and involving aquaman.

[F0xyTh3F0x]

I love how he said you can't have hell in a childrens book, but didn't say anything about fuckwad in the first book.

[MrKingclumsy]

pass more idle time before your meaningless death, touch him on the penis

[MarkArandjus]

You can't have Hell in a children's book? But... The Bible...

[GlamEye]

@MarkArandjus The Bible is not a children's book it's supposed to be a religious scripture the old testament is awesome filled with enough murder, betrayals, fighting and dark intrigue to keep it interesting, regardless of whether it's mostly true or not doesn't change the fact that it's worth reading.

[MarkArandjus]

@GlamEye 1. Way to come to a comedy sketch video and take a joke-comment seriously.

2. Cool story bro.

[DrDrolomehet]

@Kiwilolo IKR

[MadeOfCATS]

I would definitely buy these books just to creep out anyone who looks around my room

[Ogapple]

Black Sneetches and White Sneetches?

[trenchyninja]

2:29-2:30 best second of smbc, ever that look on his face is just so damn funny

[logan84burton]

I want that music for my ringtone....

[RatDude1996]

I almost died

[i0npath]

The tense music is from The Dark Knight?

[TheMinuteVlog]

So, You're Fuckable. Touch him on the penis.

[sulfuricSHAME]

I love how you do use tha same drawing style from your comics

[mekman4]

I'd pay to see this expanded in a theatrical release. Sort of like Limitless but with more substance abuse...

[1aundulxaldin]

Too bad they haven't invented a bandage for hilarious mind-fucking.

[tehcosmicexplorer08]

Oh my god, I couldn't stop laughing. Brilliant music editing.

[AssholePatrol]

He's so creepy it's beautiful.

[armegeddis]

Laugh at him, Timmy, touch him on the penis? :U

[JohnTheFabulous]

Vote this comment above those that spoil the punchline plz.

[Kogerii]

The music made this skit.

[Rictorran]

where can i buy these books?

[dumbzebra]

isn´t it "childrens´ books"

[skinsvideos21]

@dumbzebra: Possesive.

[dumbzebra]

@skinsvideos21 hu?

[skinsvideos21]

@dumbzebra Child/children v.s. Child's/children's

Come on, what did they teach you at school mate?

[skinsvideos21]

@dumbzebra Es tut mir leid, ich wusste nicht, Sie waren Deutsche.

[LootFragg]

@skinsvideos21 I know it's a bit late to say that but please do not apologize for correcting him. Your question was valid (we get this stuff taught) and if it was used as an insult, it was justified. Being German is not an excuse. I don't want it to be an excuse. I'm German. If I do something wrong, correct me. I'm not a retard. And if someone doesn't know his way around a foreign language, he might still use punctuation and capital letters and be polite. Being German is not a fucking disease.

[skinsvideos21]

@LootFragg Whoa man, I didn't ever say being German is a disease! I just mistook him for a native speaker who couldn't write properly. And yeah, at least I took the time to point out to him that the possessive case (stuff with apostrophes) was what he was missing in his sentence.

Schönen Tag noch!

[LootFragg]

@skinsvideos21 It seems to me you didn't understand what I tried to imply. I'm saying the guy is dumb and does not need to be treated with the utmost respect. In fact, the only thing I find disturbing is how you apologized to him, especially in his own language in case he doesn't understand yours. Do not, I repeat, do not under any circumstances apologize to idiots. Whether he failed school in Mississippi or did so in Germany, shit happens but don't feel sorry and especially don't say you are.

[LootFragg]

@skinsvideos21 Next time you correct someone, do so knowing you did good. Non-native speakers are basically allowed more mistakes with regards to their otherwise flawless native language. That means attacking someone for his lingual inadequacy in a regular debate is usually bad ("ad hominem"). But this is about language so you are asked to criticize him regardless of his nationality, gender, age or sexual preference. I only dislike your overtolerant attitude towards foreigners. That's it.

[skinsvideos21]

@LootFragg Fine, I'll be a mean douche to strangers when they mess up in English. Just kidding, I get your point, I know it's a disservice, and don't get me wrong, I hang out a lot with second-language learners and help them improve their English (or Spanish) all the time. However, this is Youtube and I can't be arsed. But thanks for pointing it out anyway, criticism shows people care, and I appreciate that (just iike when someone corrects me when I mess up in a foreign language).

[LootFragg]

@skinsvideos21 To get things straight: Don't criticize the living shit out of everybody. If someone asks you "Say, wouldn't it be >childrens' books< or am I mistaken?", then that's a different story, that's an actual person who only needs a friendly informative answer like: "Nah, it's [explanation], mate." But someone who doesn't even put a question mark behind a question and leaves his claim like this does not give the slightest shit and deserves the mean douche attitude. Foreign != stupid.

[bbrake]

End with an extreme close-up of his eyes, touch him on the penis.

The Epilogue.

[yeyoMex2]

r yall from dallas tx?

[fail98]

smbc- Suck My Big Cock

[awanderingmadman]

Jon Brence is my favourite 

[tissuekins]

Why aren't you guys partner yet?

[Efreeti]

OBLIVION

[shadowcw4]

O_O . yeah.........thats was........fuck

[Youtomia]

What did the guy on the phone say?

[bstmanversusskeletor]

@Youtomia "You just distributed his book on puberty. There's a copy on your desk."

[Youtomia]

@bstmanversusskeletor Thanks. :D

[Melodicbrush]

ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[kerodean]

Best of the bunch

[salvo711]

That rising noise creeps the fuck out of me.

THERE ARE NO RHYMES IN HELL.

[breakdance74]

Haha, I recognise SMBC's artwork from the drawing of the nephew. Top quality!

[strakkla]

So, You're Fuckable.

[FlyingSwordfish]

Definitely the best SMBC Theater yet. The creepy music makes it.

[zombieshlong]

I need a sneech shirt now ^^ lol

[EzraNailo]

This is by far my favorite SMBC Theater.

[schizoidish]

This is one of my favorites, the smile with glasses makes it.

"This doesn't rhyme because there are no rhymes in hell."

Awesome.

[AndrewJN]

Is that the Dark Knight score?

[idugupthegrave]

I love the ascending music that plays whenever the guy's showing off his twisted designs....well played

[mascot950]

you should acctaully release these book. i'd buy them and and show them to kids in the street

[TheSilentTyger]

@mascot950: Grow up.

[mascot950]

NEVER!!!!!

[Aleniums]

"so you're fuckable.

so go out there, and fuck like rabbits, because nobody likes a virgin, especially an inexperienced one.

that's all that's in this book, you can find an adult that will fuck you most likely in a dark alley at night, or lurking around your school during the day. have fun kids!"

that's probably what the rest of the book said lol (it's canon to the creepiness of it)

[faerrrd]

I would love to own those books!

[somercet1]

"Grass on the field? Play ball." ;-)

[Totema1]

This gets better every time I watch it. Jon is excellent at being creepy.

[YouGuysArnt]

"You're so fuckable" is the best possible line for that.

[Croatianraider]

At 2:10 there's a graph on the white board with the plot "scribbles over time."

Great vid. Favorite one yet.

[praguepride]

Awesome layering.

"Don't worry, he doesn't go to hell"

And then there's nothing, just oblivion. Way to freak out the kids guys.

[YamiMario]

Holy shit, that was great.

[uurmek]

2:09 loving the empty bookshelf in an editors office.

[Silkenfist]

Oooh, I totally missed that one the first six times I saw the video. Nice detail.

[tonatonari]

Holy shit. I think I just died a little inside. In a good way.

Well, now I'm frightened and intrigued. Congratulations, that was amazing.

[Terrakinetic]

I really expected JP to say "strike three!" at some point in this video.

[Draugo]

"You only have one more Mike"

[geoffreyhuntley]

the music was amazing. Intense.

[Aleniums]

this movie was epic win, especially that last part, and I agree

[DementedJuggalette]

i want those books!! and i want to pull the oblivion flap!

[HunsV]

Impact would have been higher if you didn't censor things.

[weeecrap]

Dunno, but I think the censorship makes it funnier.

[Emhilradim]

Haha, love the look on JP's face and his tone when book two is first brought up. "...Yeah...."

Definitely an awesome addition to the SMBC Theatre.

[70mildcat]

Why censor all the videos?

[peanutfoot]

I wish I'd had these books growing up.

[613TheEvil]

Why was fuck censored? Why?

[goldpenguinOmega]

because they're children books!

[Kylelolcat]

Hilarious video!

I thought it wasn't that funny, but it grew on me!

The Abbot and Costello one is still my fave, tho.

[Sylar03]

Ah, you can definitely tell Zach did the artwork.

[Silkenfist]

I love the series but it seems to me that you still need to find someone who can play the straight guy perfectly. I love JP but this one might have been his wo... let's say least good performance. James, too, seems to be clearly at his best when he is allowed to be the goofball. Ironically you just referred to Bud Abbott last week, who might have been the best straight guy on earth.

[someguysacount]

lol

[Toekneebullard]

Just a fan trying to be constructive: I think some of your punchlines are too slow. They feel a little drawn out, and the drawing out doesn't help the punchline at all.

Keep working hard! Thanks for the free entertainment!

[traltixx]

Is SMBC going to actually come out with these childrens books? because I would totally buy them and give them to kids

[neueziel321]

Haha Jon Brence is so good at being creepy

[mrfridge17]

this was SO SO good A huge achievement boys!!

[BannedennaB]

Cool rip off from WKUK TV Show Ideas.

[Toekneebullard]

I don't think it's a rip-off, but yeah, I totally thought about that sketch too.

[ApplePiePodDuex]

Hahaa, excellent.

+1 comment

[Rocky183]

I like how we see SMBC comics-style drawings on the SMBC video series

[bobnine]

I think these books would sell quite well. That publisher has no vision.

[SuperJammers]

Hahaha, this is great they're getting so much better =D

[technicallyabsurd]

I like the musical sting to create MAD SUSPENSE. Reminds me of the droning whine in the background during the Dark Knight Joker scenes.

[soulhunter4444]

I know I might be marked down for this but I didn't like this one as much as the others.

[netninja90]

i agree.

[keyboardtalk]

Five stars! I love the music!!

[Grithoof]

Omg, this is so great, best video so far in my opinion.

[hahayouarefunny]

Nice empty bookshelf, Mr. Publisher.

[jonbrence]

Those of you who say comments of disapproval: You will all be in my new Children's Book. Lets just say its similar to the Lorax.

[Cleverconveyence]

BITCH I SPEAK FOR THE TREES

[TSKB]

not good

Keep your comics and your videos seperatre

[AliceHatt]

Eh.

Until the end.

Then I loled.

[mikemip2005]

This is the one of the weakest ones so far, still kinda funny though.

[vfw2]

haha another masterpiece. You guys are like a factory with this stuff. So many vids in such a short time, and their all quality! Nice work

[payoamargo]

AWesome. Twenty billion poins zach.

[bulbinking]

epic

[GallileoPaballa]

I wish I could breed with SMBC theater. I'll first need find a way to digitize my sperm like that laser in TRON.

[eyesofnova]

lol, I love SMBC and theaters.

[BannedennaB]

Rip off from "WKUK TV Show Ideas". Quit watching so much Whitest Kids U Know bro.

[Benjerman]

The show ideas one was different. Because they actually liked the ideas...

[randomite88]

Um.. this really has very little to do with that sketch. Just the "pitching ideas for shows" premise is the same. Which doesn't entail a rip off at all.

[Daneus05]

hahahaha!

[Azalraku]

another instant classic from smbc! you're all personal heroes.

[bx32]

Definitely my favorite video out of the SMBC theater. I gets me every time, "So you're f%$kable."

[johncar11]

You guys keep producing very entertaining short films, although I didn't laugh out loud at this one, I was smiling the whole way through.

[shiromakoto]

What does this video say about me when I think this might be my favorite one of the SMBC series? (tied with Russian Roulette and Genie)

[redman8903]

keep making these

[BruceMcManly]

Oh my god, Jon was terrifying.

And I'm happy to see Zach's illustrations in SMBC theater.

[GodOfRessurrection]

Instructions for after the video>

Stop

Drop

LOL!

[Tattoo222]

Mad creepy...until the ending

[AndrewJN]

I love these guys!

[nitzwalsh86]

Agreed! I was amused and horrified all at the same time.

[ExtremeSquared]

How is there still not a children's book on eugenics?

[corvidaecorvus]

I plussed you because I thought you were joking, oh please god can that be a joke....

[ExtremeSquared]

Racists hate SMBC. It's a fact.

[Vlaew]

LOLLERGLAFLARBLE!!!

[triph]

Best acting yet and the timing is getting better and better.

[voxiphiliac]

This doesn't rhyme, Timmy.

There are no rhymes in hell.

I love inappropriate kids' books. These were great.

[dicekar]

holy shit this keeps getting better. how do you top this one?? i cant wait to find out

[bobmonkey420]

Haha...oh inferior race joke...

[nohohongs]

AWESOMEEEEE

[nenxe]

Eh. Sound design still needs improvement.

[RoyLeeIV]

End was perfect.

[Twunga]

These two actors are my favorites.

Your writing and production standards are getting better. good job dudes.

[evisceratedcake]

Easily the best yet.

[ComancheKnight]

I never thought thinking of those children's books would give me nightmares... and I never thought I'd think the "Who's on first" routine would ever need a censored version. I suppose there's a first time for everything... 5 stars for giving me a series of twisted firsts.

[FueledByRock]

Another great one. Pressing play passes more of my idle time before my meaningless homework.

[burnyourfriendsx]

Ahaha that was brilliant.

My favorite so far, I think.

[theboredone]

I gave you 6 stars for inserting your artwork into the video.

I can do that.

[drac0n81]

lmfao wooooow

awesome shit

[chaos31689]

I wanna know what happens when I pull the flap!

[davethebrave]

You pass more idle time before your meaningless death.

[chaos31689]

Right, I forget how to pay attention sometimes.. Thanks lol

[kevinchizai]

I absolutely love the eerie, intense music.

[DoctorKazefa]

THERE ARE NO RHYMES IN HELL

A++

You guys are getting REALLY good!!

[Monkeyboy92037]

lol

[Zombiebushi]

Your videos give me a reason to live.

[thunderpants10]

win

[BradAlturn]

Classic 5 star comedy

[F3RA1]

I love what you guys do!