Added: 4 years ago
From: missacro
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  • look at the string on her nose

    and look wat it leads too

  • i wasn't allowed to have anything when i was in it was awful i was so bored.I've been in 3 times for cutting and suicidal thoughts but never for an eating disorder it never got that bad. i think its just glorified babysitting they dont do shit

  • @Lyssiegohsrawrrrr it totally depends on where you go, a lot of hospitals are crap and just like a babysitter but if you go somewhere with the right treatment team they can be so much help!!! ive been out of hospital other then testing and a random overnight here and there for rehydration etc for 2 years now !!! it just takes a combination of the right people and being ready to get better yourself .

  • i was in a mental hospital and we couldnt have shoes with laces. clothes with strings. no ipods, laptops, dvds, cds, hard cover books, pencils, pens, markers, crayons, anything airisol, razers, scissors, tweezers, nail polish, food in our rooms or drinks, headbands, rubberbands(only sometimes), makeup, and a lot of us had eating disorders and i was having an oncoming anorexia and they were monitoring everything i ate and i would hide the food so they thought i ate it...it was scary...

  • @97chelseataylor this was a medical hospital ward, so it was much more slack about what was allowed. i was still monitored on what iate and often on oen to one , though. ive been in various places and yes its quite hard to be in the stricter places but sometimes you need. i can tell you though, hiding food will only keep you sick !! and trust me recovery is soooooo much better! im so happy now, more so then i ever thought possible!!!

  • Don't forget the nasty ass food. I hated being in i missed my ipod I need it to sleep. I was annoyed to say the least. And my mom refused to bring me books until i did my homework so all i did was sit in my room during quiet time or at lights out and twiddle my thumbs.

  • @97chelseataylor Don't forget the nasty food. I hated being in. and the no makeup somedays i need my makeup or else i look like something from a horror movie. I went insane in the pysch ward from nothing to do all day

  • I know from experience how hard it is to overcome and be recovered from an eating disorder; everyday is tough but I'm recovering and have been for a year 2medusa . com I have posted my story there

  • I sincerely wish you all the love in the world, and hope you choose recovery. It is such a tantalising possibility: a life not dictated by food or it's absence. And yet it is so hard to embrace. It's terrifying. But doable.

    Have faith.

  • @imnai Thanks! this is an extremely old video, about three years old actually. I am doing very well now :) yes its still scary but living a life free of ed has had so many more benifits me. i love life now

  • @missacro Have you done an update video? I see here where you say this is extremely old and you're doing well now. I'd love to hear about your journey. No words are adequate and sound petty when trying to say what I mean, but I AM so very happy for you. I congratulate you on the hard work (I KNOW it takes--I'm recovered as well). What are you doing with your life now?

  • i know its the best thing and my dr perscribed me to this eating disorder medication and not sure what its suppose to do but i hope that i works i know its wierd but i guess there is a new thing for eatind disorders lol haha

  • haha yeah lol see that is the bad thing i refuse to eat all the time my mom is going to put me in rehab during the summer cause i just wont eat anything for her and if i do i with purge i jus am scared of having to get a feeding tube lol

  • @tatterbugluv well i know you dont want it, and it seems you are not at the point where you ready for recovery but sometimes your immediate health and safety is more important. yea feeding tubes suckm yeah they are scary but sometimes they are needed, perhaps rehab is what you need. all i can say is try to keep an open mind. at first recovery was the furthest thing from what i wanted but now im happier then i have ever been and im truly living.. and loving it .

  • if you have bulimia and anorexia would they give you a feeding tube if you went in cause i dont want one they dont look comfortable yuck

  • @tatterbugluv they dont automatically give you one

    i had one because i refused to eat anything at all at that point. if you are cooperative and are trying to eat and do they probably wont give you one. it totally depends on the situation.

    and they are annoying but you get used to them. i totally forgot mine was there half the time

  • I have an eating disorder! But Can I get into hospital beacuse of bulimia?

  • @FannyMiley you definitely can get treatment for bulimia. many girls i was in hospital and residential with had bulimia. its just as much of a problem as anorexia

  • @missacro Thanks for you answer!

  • @MissSarahx3 thanks in last 6 months i started to do really well! im not cured but i can enjoy life and i see its possible now

  • I have an eating disorder also. I'm been in a few hospitals for it but they didn't help at all. They didn't give me any therapy. Although I'm doing somewhat better for now it's still really hard. I hope your doing well. I know we don't know each other but sometimes it helps to talk to people that are going through the same thing. I'm here if you want me to be. :)

  • @Liza1612 I agree its still hard. i was doing terrible the last three eyars until six months ago and i all of a sudden started to do amazing.i can go out and LIVE now. im not happy all the time and i still make mistakes but ive made so much progess and can enjoy food. I know i will be fully recovered someday now, where as before i never saw that possible

  • @missacro That's awesome! Thank you for shareing this with me. Even though I still have bad days I now am doing better when in the past I never thought I could.

  • @Liza1612

    Don't worry, you may not feel well at the moment, but your illness will be over someday. I had both anorexia and bulimia (for 5 long years) and I almost died and I know what kind of hell you are going through, but believe me, there is always light at the end of the tunnel. I thought I would be sick for the rest of my life, but things changed drastically two years ago and I'm completely healthy now (without any medical help). Fingers crossed!

  • i have questions...im 13....im anorexic....im thinking about going to the hospital but im nervous/scareed to.....what should i do?

  • @Invisablexoxoxo sorry i never responded. Get help its always worth a try recovery is so much better

  • Well hospitals are not the best places to be in,

    every time I was in a hospital it felt like it was making my mental state even worse

    and a number of times I was able to leave even before they said it was ok, but what good is treatment when it feels like a low security prison.

  • yeah majority of the time i dound just hospital didnt help, i needed the therapy part of it .

    medical hospitals just depressed me!

  • @elektrinate

    You're completely right! Those stupid hospitals make our mental condition even worse. My hospital was worse than any prison, they treated me like a psycho! I was constantly tortured there and although it happened more than 5 years ago, I still hate that bastards and I want revenge!

  • I struggle with an eating disorder too. They want to put me in a hospital but i'm scared..

  • its okay to be scared, its not easy but sometimes for the best

  • Hang in there! I'm struggling too, but w/ bulimia. I went to treatment at Remuda Ranch, and I'm not totally better but I'm getting there...best of luck :)

  • hey this is a very old video

    i still struggle too and i have been to remuda as well it is the one thath elped most i also went to bcch after this video but it was more detrimental.

    i continue to do op and work hard and not give up i hope you never give up either !

  • you are so so brave to post this hunni.how are u doing now??sending u all the best wishes in the world,this battle cant get worse xxxx

  • i wish you the best of luck hon.

    Fight, keep fighting.

    Best whishes sweetie.

    <3

  • Hope you're doing beter.. take good care girl x

  • This was in 2007, but I hope you are doing so much better.

    I wish I could give you a hug.

  • unfortunately im not doing any better but i keep trying

    thanks so much for the encouragement

  • I'm so sorry to hear that.

    If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm here. Do you have an xanga?

  • good luck girl<3

  • Good luck hun :]

    I really wish you the best of luck

    I'm so sorry your going to be stuck in there for so long though

  • Get some therapy you need to fight it harder and hard and do whatever it takes to do so. Don't let it eat you. You are a young girl and that weight thing is no big deal. Don't pay mind what people say.

    They will always have comments about your image. Take care. Hope you recover well. bye

  • uh did you not even lsiten to this.. i have been doing therapy and continue to...

    also it has noting to do with my weight ...

  • i understand how you feel...i will pray for you...stay strong..i believe in you!

  • I have been there hun, i know how you feel.

    I have recovered now so there is hope!

  • Good luck this is soo sad.....obviously we are sad for you but I find it wierd I dont want to be better but I want everyone else to be.

  • the tube going up your nose dosnt look like it is attached to anything...o well maybe u just unhooked it....good luck in recovery

  • That's not a tube but a probe. Ofc it's not attached..They attach it just when "eating".

  • I know this is old but I am wishing you well. You deserve recovery as well and you haven't given up on yourself - you are still here. Keep fighting dear.

  • hey there. you dont know me, and i really dont know you, but I have briefly saw you at BCCH while visiting my cousin Crystal. Then I saw you again in the lobby of KGH last week. At least i think ur the same girl. I hope you get better soon. I watched yer video and it made me smile and my depression went away. Thanks. (Dan)

  • Hello, I've recently been diagnosed with anorexia..and you're video has inspired me. You see I've been looking at Thinspos for about a year now and i love them, its like a target...an ambition. But Im really struck by what might end up happening to me, Im already too weak to go on long walks and stuff..Im scared it might happen to me! I dont want to be put on a feeding tube or go to hospital...I thought i'd given up but your video has changed that. So truely...Thank you. :)

  • I honestly consider you lucky that you can go to the hospital, receive the NG tube, and be able to go to BC Children's. I've been denied insurance so I cannot afford hospital, nor will a doctor here place the tube.

    Why do WE deserve to recover, but YOU don't?

  • A) no llonger can go back to bcch as i turn 18 before there is a spot available.

    and i get insurance from my mother yes i am incredibly lucky in tat way

    im sorry u do not have that availbale to you.

    and about the recovery thing, i can not naswer that without saying some ofm y life story which im not ready to share with the world yet.

  • How are you now?

  • im not doing well but im not giving up.

  • I'm glad to hear you're not losing your spirit :)

  • I love you Anne <3

  • i am still not recovered and im much more underweight at the moment but the reason i dont go blasting pictured of me now is because I AM NOT PROUD OF IT. and no one should be. but i am trying tochange and thats whats important, so the fact that i was in there even when my weight wasnt that low was HUGE deal to ME. and as for an update im currently in and out of hospital still with ha ways to go but hoping il lget there.

  • OKAY TO CLEAR THIS ALL UP!

    first of all this video is over a year old. i had been in the hospital or treatment center continuesly for about 8 or 9 mnths by then, and alot of weight had been restored but my mind was not at all fixed. my weight has been everywhere from 50 pounds to 117 in the last couple years b ut that has nothign to do with where my mind is or how my heart and organs are functioning.

  • OK i understand i had one too for 3 years I understand how it really affects your insides.I weighed 70 something too it does suck and i am sorry I really was just trying to say i didn't know until now that it affected her insides first. I am 5'9 now and i am 126lbs, I still look emaciated.

  • Hey beautiful, how have you been doing lately? I know how it feels... I managed to keep my eating well for almost 6 months and now I'm back to a mix of starving, and binge/purge cycles... it's horrible. I decided to work on it with my bf... he has a drug problem, so we must stop together... everytime he fucks up, I get to starve for a day or purge and vice versa... it's been working really well so far... we've gone 2 weeks.

  • awwee, babe, i'm sorry =[

    and ignore the jerks who are being retarded

    you're gonna be fine =]

  • I think some people are just being asshohles and kinda insensitive.

    Like, obviously you're in hospital for a reason, and by insulting you and telling you you're too fat for help isn't helping.

    So, just thought I'd say, don't listen to dumb internet people

  • i got stuck in 2 hospitals for 3 weeks...it was bad...i hope u are doing better...i was thankful God provided me with the stretgh to not be put on a feeding tube...

  • what are u her friend or something, U TELL ME TO LAY OF,please. I don't care what u say she is not bad at all, She must weigh 95 pounds or something, Have seen people that have eating disorders who weigh 59 pounds and they are in their 20's. so befor u tell me to lay off look around.

  • She may not be my ''best friend'' but I sure as hell DO know what an eating disorder is - I have been anorexic since age 11. My lowest weight was 53 lbs, and right now, I am 77 lbs and trying to recover. People don't have to ''look'' like they have an eating disorder to have one.

  • Well then genius, how about diagnose her yourself? I mean CLEARLY the professionals didn't get it right.....

    Lay off.

  • Yeah, you can be like 300 pounds and then starve yourself to 200 and you'd still be considered anorexic because of the way you're losing weight and how you're thinking of yourself and basically your self image.... anorexia is a mental disorder, not a physical one.

  • so u think u have to be 60lbs to have an eating disorder??

    it doesnt matter what u weigh... when ur body starts shutting down, its because its malnurished... not just because ur skinny.

    stupid fucking kid.

  • does getting a feeding tube put in hurt?

  • most people think so i didnt really

  • i thought it hurt the first time. but that it makes you less guilty than eating. especially because there are nurses who have too watch you. couldn't bear that. hope youve had an ok day if you read this

    x

  • i honestly didnt not even feel it that much ahha and i know how to do itmyself so maybe doing it yourself may help a little?

    i dont know if i fel any less guilty but a bit less stressed and also yea freedom of after while not having nurses around so much.

  • well i'm glad you realised that you want to commit suicide when eating. i hope that amiking that realization can help you..holyshit your from bc!! I havent met anyone else whos anoreixic or bulimic here. well goodluck, get well, and remember ONE STEP AT A TIME!

  • well there is soooo many of us you;re definately not alone

  • I was around 11 or 12 when I started having eating disorders my parents found out when I was 14 and got help I'm so glad!!!

  • im so glad to hear you got help! :)

  • Im So Sorry About This!

    Hope Youre Better.

    x

  • you have not givin up on yourself u have reolized that u have a problem that has to be fixed and evern u know that it is hard you are trying your hardest to fix it. good for you, you are doing the right thing.!!!!!!!

  • :S why is your feeding tube cut in half?

  • it just wasnt hooked up to the feed thats all

  • wow i can totally relate to you!! i'm going through the same hell!

  • Are You Better Now?

    How Old Are Yu?

    x

  • definately not im in the hospital again (pretty much have been since then though )this video is very old iwas prob 16 in it and im now almost 18

  • Oh gosh!

    I'm so sorry.

    Don't worry about what you look like on the outside, it matters about what you look like on the inside.

  • I myself have suffered at the hands of an eating disorder and have to fught every day not to relapse. I didnt get to the point of hospital but i was constantly watched by family and friends, ie followed to the bathroom. I now am training to be a nurse and want to specialise to work with eating disorder sufferers. Be strong keep fighting x

  • I was sent to BC Children's hospital but not for an eating disorder. I was close to be..

  • I hope you are better now <3

  • unfortunately not ive been hospitalizd many times since the nand currently am again right now but i am fighting hard so thatsa start :)

  • wow. this is so emotional and inspirational, and i hope your doing a lot better.

  • woah was that hospital like not specializing in eating disorders? youre not allowed to have ANY magazines in the few ive been to. because of the thin people in there or whatever.

    anyways hope youre better now and whatnot :P

  • no it was justm y local peds ward hah

    magazines dont bother me or anything though os im lucky that way liek when is aee them i dont go ooh pretyt models first thing i think of photoshpopped anorexic

    umm i stil lstrugle greatl yand acutally am in a worse placecurrently in some ways. i did go to childrens hospital i was talking about in that vid and it was crappy./

  • she's in canada. we have free health care over here

  • jeez, this is old. i hope you're doing much better now.

  • hey unfortunately i think im worse :S

  • hey hun im sorry abt u sturggles i hope your gettting better now if u need to talk meassage me

  • yes I will contact you ! my only dream now is to load a gun and eat it

    thanks for your kindness

    stay strong!

  • thanks for replying sweetie . It has been really hard I really want to die ..every time I take a bite I want to commit suicide..I feel the same now

    u made my day...maybe some one cares :0)

    take care

  • hey if you need to talk feel free to message me!

  • hey babe. why'd u delete this? anyway im REALLY sorry. but i hope your better now. some of the things had said in tis veido REALLY helped me in my recovery!!

  • i didnt delete it im glad it helped though!

  • OMGG!!! thanks sooo much!! yesterday it was SAYIG th video was not avaliable!!! 'm sooo glad its working now!!! ♥ u girl!! how r u?

  • good glad its working

    im struggling still greatly thats why i havent made a video in over 6 months now..

    how are you?

  • lmmfao, is that a 1-fr tube!?? lucky you lmfao, either that or its a piece of string strapped to the side of your face with masking tape, lol

  • it was a 6 i think lol yeah i was lucky they didnt force it on me i kinda agreed to it thats why they gave me a small one hahaha

  • are u on a feeding tube?

    u do deserve a normal life...trust me...the years go by sooooooooooo damn fast

    do go anywhere u have to or you will be like me! 10 years later wishing u had

    stay strong and brave!

  • hah yeah i was on a feeding tube pretty old video. ive been suffering for over 14 years now andi know what you mean i hope yourdoing well npow!

  • Where has this girl with the positive attitude gone?! You CAN have recovery, i would ship it to you with your gift if i could :)

    I wish i could just be closer so that we could chat properly and cheer each other up :)

    I'm always here for you, you know that, but you shouldn't give up on yourself, i haven't given up on you and i know a few others who havent either..

    you WILL find recovery, i'll make sure of it :)

    xx

  • i hope u stay strong and recover ♥ (sry my english may not be very good..)

  • i see you ate your faith also.

    don't give up. its possible.

  • i hope you get better alot! i donn't want recovery. i thinkn i'm fine cuz i eat lil.

    <321

    Katlyn Constance Katastrophe&trade;&copy;

  • So true i lost a friend recently to a eating disorder its so hard i myself am struggling to be thin enough it takes so much more then the weight loved the video

  • I'll pray for you...

    Don't worry... God shows miracles if you believe...

    Have Faith

  • Stay strong , sweetie ! WARM hugs from Sweden :)

  • Hi.

    I hope you're feeling better than from four months ago.

    - Recent subscriber :)

  • I wish the best for you, i hope you can reacover from your Anorexia, (and i hope you can understand my really bad english, i'm sorry for that)(:

  • Stay strong!!

  • i just FINALLY sent you your letter :) don't give up hun. i know that you can beat this!

  • :(

    Bless you

    Im praying for you

    stay strong sweetheart

  • I'm really glad that you've made this video. It's a great way to NOT glamourize ED's. I went to Remuda Ranch as well and I am now recovered. :) I definitely think that you can do it...I will be praying for you.

  • I would not give up. Anyways I've been to Ramuda was there for seven months (I was really near death) too. I've heard from top professionals it's actually NOT the best place in world for eating disorders. There are much better programs.

  • i reallie hope the best 4 u. see u need not 2 starve 4 attention and don't be afraid i had anorexia. please get better =*(

  • you look pretty healthy hon... now you need to get your head together so you can stay healthy and live a fulll, happy life... you can do it, babe!

  • yes at the time physically i appeared pretty healthy but i wasnt, my heart and vitals were not doing well at all. And now that and my weight are much worse unfortunetly.

  • I really hope you can get past this whole thing, anorexia is pure evil. Well, I'll be honest I kind of liked not getting my period...but that's NOT the point. It kills and you deserve so much better! You're beautiful and you can beat this. Just stay strong&hearts;

  • k im kinda slow, =P, so she doesnt eat beasue she doesnt want to hurt her self?

    Also if i keep loseing pounds like i am i will be in the hospital with the feeding tube. =(

  • Each program is different. You don't know what BC Children's has to offer. I encourage you to try. You have a lot to gain. Best of luck!

    Love,

    Li

  • wow honey. its so good to see you with a positive mindset. take care and you know myself and all the girls are always here for you ok?

    Look after yourself and good luck. we all know you can do it! your a star and we all love ya to bits. *big hugs* xx

  • Ah lovey you can do it; Don't give up, believe in you. Keep pushing through. You seem like a really sweet person- get better.

  • ur beautiful (not becuase ur thin) dont give up hope, keep fighting this, i kno how hard it is, but u can do it. *hugs* take care.

  • Hey, I hope one day you will be able to recover and love yourself for the beautiful person that you are, cuz you are beautiful. Hugs......Take care..

  • Hugs for doing this and for having the courage to take that step, this step of yours. I fully support you

  • everything in time, my dear. baby steps and one step at a time . . recovery doesn't happen over night, but it is certainly possible. it does get easier, it really does. it sounds like you are on the right track, just keep fighting and be good to yourself. you sound stronger already.

  • thanks so much im reeally trying to not give up onmyself but i already have im still trying i just dont knoe if ill ever get there

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