Mario Cantone - Vagina Monolouge

[nmarra01]

kim kardashian's vagina? my vagina is a sex tape!

[panoulis]

Marley Matlin's VAGINA!



[marly100]

How about Courtney Love?

[nmarra01]

@marly100 my vagina is on crack

[Cruelladevil66]

HAHAHA i laughed so hard at the anna nicole part.

[DarkRezo]

I LOVE this comedian, gonna upload Comedy Central special 24min soonish coz' Mario just introduced a WHOLE new level of Respect towards Italians for me xD haha he kills it br0 !

[chestersdad07]

7 people's vaginas are haunted.

[JFLD8]

what would Helen Keller's vagina say?

[61892jb]

@JFLD8 It would sign the words, "Spell that out again for me?"

[JFLD8]

HELEN KELLER!

[haymaker710]

Lady Gaga: My vagina was born this way

[RandomTask3000]

MARIO CANNOT BE STUMPED!

[ToxicPeaches14]

Six people have sand in their vaginas.

[lambda1982]

This mutha fucka is funny. If you ever get the chance to see him live...go!!!

[joanneka]

omg!! J-Lo whahahaha lmao literally whahah

[haymaker710]

What would Bristol Palin's vagina say?

[imcrazy85]

effing genius

[rabidrabbitshuggers]

"Paris Hilton!"

"Oh fuck you!"

[haymaker710]

Christine O'Donnell's vagina: "My vagina is not a witch."

[TheCherryBomber1]

@haymaker710 "My vagina is nothing you've heard"

[FungusMossGnosis]

I heard ... Nancy Reagan: Just spake Nancy's vagina - "NO!" .

[celtkilt]

Paris Hilton: "My vagina is a dirty hotel towel! "

[FOX3762]

Really funny stuff..... If your a forty year old bull-dyke. Never thought I would see anyone who is less funny than Dane Cook. Go back to being shit-pipe alley.

[Eseress]

@FOX3762 HURP!

[FOX3762]

@Eseress What? Did someone say you were not a husky carpet sucker with shitty taste in comedians?

[Eseress]

@FOX3762 Are you calling me a lesbian? I'm not even female. Also, please, tell me the shitty comedians I like outside of Mario Cantone.  Go ahead, amuse me you cunt.

[FOX3762]

@FOX3762 Funny as a brain tumor, fagtard.

[nyc1rob]

if you saw Laugh Whore on Broadway he was absolutely sensational. I pissed in my pants all night long.....

[leanfiend444]

A tulip with two lips, golldddd!!!!

[lamemaq]

LOL!!!! He's so talented, spontaneous. So, so funny!!!

[1joker88]

I wanna hear Bea Arthur!!!

[84ccipollini]

Joan Crawford=brilliant!

[AshleyLynn829]

XD he is fucking Hilarious

[michaelgalea]

Did someone shout "Hitler" at 3:22?

[NormaVV]

OMFG!!!! I Have To Pee!!!!! Genius.

[phlashba]

such a gift.

[marly100]

Here's a list of women I would like to Mario impersonate about thier vagina's;

Courtney Love, Kathy Griffin, Margaret Cho, Chelsea Handler, Rosie O' Donnell, Liza Minnelli, Judy Garland, Ellen DeGeneres, Angelina Jolie, Amanda Lepore, Dianna Ross, Barbara Walters, Connie Chung, and Ann Coulter

[haymaker710]

What would Sarah Palin's vagina say?

[RaveNight]

@haymaker710 My vagina can see all the way to Russia from here!

[haymaker710]

@RaveNight My vagina is going rouge.

[RaveNight]

@haymaker710 My vagina is a real maverick!

[haymaker710]

@RaveNight My vagina is a real American.

[panoulis]

@haymaker710 don't you mean rogue ???? rouge is french for red!!!

[Desponded1]

@haymaker710 My Vagina is a cold frozen winterland with 6inch thick hairs surounding it!

[haymaker710]

@Desponded1 Drill my vagina baby, drill

[MindstormRecs]

@haymaker710 I'm as big as Alaska and I'M FUCKING FREEZING!!!

[haymaker710]

@MindstormRecs My vagina has it's own reality show.

[mercuryrulz]

@haymaker710 Let's see tina fey impersonate this

[haymaker710]

@mercuryrulz My vagina is not retreating it's reloading.

[mercuryrulz]

@haymaker710 My vagina can hit a deer from 2000 yards away

[haymaker710]

@mercuryrulz My vagina is blood libel

[screendrama]

Tunnel to nowhere

[haymaker710]

@screendrama My Vagina warned the British.

[panoulis]

@haymaker710 My Vagina is a stupid mud-hole in Alaska!

[haymaker710]

@panoulis My vagina quits after half a term.

[nmarra01]

@haymaker710 my vagina likes guns

[haymaker710]

@nmarra01 My vagina is Undefeated.

[TheBohemianTenor]

Ooh, if only somebody had said Patti LuPone!

[BlueKoi1969]

Getcha balls out!

[TheDesolatedShadow]

LMFAO!

[jfbluges]

LMAO!!!

[hazelwitchhazel]

Brilliant!

[mmb1998]

the joan crawford shoulders. SNOT came out of my nose

[Oerjeke]

"My vagina is an owen... It's set to 350 degrees and there's a sour dough baking in there..."

Water came out of my nose...out of my nose...not kidding here...

[batmanguy123]

MY VAGINA IS AN OVEN!!!

[Theatershorty]

gosh i would have loved to hear what he would have said about liza manelli lololol

[RaineParadox]

He's so presh. <3

So hilarious, omfg.

[billybill90]

"my vagina is the kennedy compounds..." LOOL

[mistakrunk]

"Paris Hilton"?  FUCK HER!!

ROFL!

[PanickedSuprise]

The shoulder pad thing he added at the end MADE THIS. xD

[ChocolateFish12345]

I love him, he's so awesome, He is on my top five well loved and most respected comedians

Robbin Williams, Mario Cantone, Gabriel Iglesias, Jeff Dunham and Nikki Payne *hugs Mario* thanks for putting a smile on my face!

[laurabbhh]

all good ones but Eddie Izzard is my personal number 1.

[mikesterSTLMO]

OMG is there a funnier man on the planet? Can't believe we missed Liza's vagina LOL>

[bunnybooties]

Omg i love Mario!! My fave comedienne!:)

[monica1213]

i kno plzz upload ive been looking for this everywhere! i saw it once and it was the funniest thing ive ever seenand id really like to watch it again. i hope someone puts it up somewhere soon!!

[DamagesRocks]

I have the entire Laugh Whore on a "promotion use only" DVD. Would love to upload it, but don't know the first thing how too.

[animilautrec]

omg dude, upload it to zshare or something PLEASE.

[mkl62]

Mario will be appearing on The View tomorrow.

[sinzombi]

oh my god he is a genius ♥

[StevenLasher]

PLEASE POST HIM DOING JUDY AND LIZA

[thereisnogodbutman]

4:30 awesome!!!

[Iori400]

MAN SHUT UP he pwns..

[nickdecarlo76]

HE IS A GENIUS!

[dprince]

seeing mario tonight and can't wait! hoping for an updated version of this. would be cool to have more postings from this show, "laugh whore"- ( the lipsynced "nevertheless ( i'm in love with you ) is real fun too!!! more mario on youtube..., please!!!!

[avantgarde1226]

Eleanor Roosevelt is priceless!!!

[getogatocat]

This needs to be on DVD BAD!

He is a genius!

And I about rolled over and died with the Judy Garland impersonation!

[Gilbert452]

lol my vagina secretly likes other vaginas

[lokienvy]

"SNAP!!"

[bearswilleatme]

this guy used to hate on michael:p

[g00dTimesBADtimes]

lolz @ katherine hepburn! "my vagina shivers and quivers..." NICE!

[IdahoMoe1963]

My vagina is a dirty Hotel Towel. lol

[cosmosman]

MHHYYY VHHAAAGGHINNAA IHHS DHRRHY AHHSS A BHOOONNEE

rofl best part

[skrinkles3]

the marilyn monroe lip quiver! omg i just died!

[FergusMcDopey]

"Kiss it on the lips like a lover!"........... A BRILLIANT Stanwyck impersonation!

[LornaDoone63]

"The Kennedy Compound." LMAO

[crystalrain110]

"my vagina talks and talks and doesn't know what the FUCK it's saying! melissa where's my vagina?!"

i love him :D

[vash1426]

Joann River Lmao

[dbzkado]

lol

[FabulousJV]

"I also use it in the summer time as a tree house for the children."

Its official, I now love him!

[SuckMeeee]

"My vagina secretly likes other vaginas" LOL

[nitemarebydesign]

This man is absolutely brilliant. From this moment forward I shall worship him.

[ipop4]

thank you!

[NiseyGerl]

I remember him from Steampipe Alley.....he was hysterical back then!!

[retrograderenegades]

I just saw this guy on comedy central last night at like 3 in the morning he was pretty funny, clearly has talent. You homophobes can fuck off I didn't realize comedy had a sexual preference

[cdumeohyeah]

Someone needs to kill this fucking faggot- NOT FUNNY! Hang this cocksucking poo-pusher.

[MemeSha]

I get what you're sayin bro. I mean he's no LARRY THE CABLE GUY.

You uncultured inbred retarded fucking redneck.

[MemeSha]

I'm not gay, but you can call me an honorary queer.

[liina000]

Do you get some kind of satisfaction out of this? I've watched through several Mario Cantone videos today and under every single one of them I see your unintelligent, moronic comments. I don't understand. You hate the guy, YET you have time to go from video to video and post the same comment over and over again. That's pathetic, dude.

[muser9903]

great comeback there buddy

[mazakiel]

I think you like it in ass. . .usually homophobics after a few beers get all homo. I'm sure your just insecure, and deep down inside you are gay. You know it's true.

[fear2the2spork]

we're all a little gay my friend ^-^

and you can have ur opinions but to go around bad mouthing him on youtube is just childish

im sure doing this is getting in the way of your wife beating and coke sniffing time so maybe you should lay off

[madgamer23]

I love Mario Cantone! Thanks for the upload

[xdajlo82]

i cannot tell you how happy you have put this up on here...Thank you so much. I just cried laughing so hard

[yaoiqueen2627]

wow this guy is funny i can't stop laughing

[jauipop]

"my vagina is a dirty hotel towel"

LOL!

[xxdanger7xx]

haha hes my uncle lol

[adrianaisfuckingdope]

ew your have a loose vag. gross. kill yourself.

[bigdicky321]

i will very soon

[adrianaisfuckingdope]

bigdicky has sand in his vag.

[bigdicky321]

my vag is like the sleeve of a wizard. nothing can be held in it. way too loose for even sand. p.s. go fuck your mother

[93Hondax2]

a friend of mine met mario she said he is exactley like that all the time he was hilarious.

[bigdicky321]

this guy is soooo funny. he also never takes up the ass, or sucks dicks.

[shooni85]

what the fuck does that have to do with anything!?

[Tinymoezzy]

why would you watch and comment then if you do not like him?,,, i am not trying to step on your commenting toes here but well, why? Just to spread some negative vibes?

[bigdicky321]

Because he just erks me. Is there a good reason for my comment? no. But this is an open forum of differing opinions, and i dont want it to be a love fest for gay humor that is total overemotive and hammy. fuck this guy.

[Tinymoezzy]

meh its youtube i guess to each there own. You are totally free to comment and i guess that means we should agree to disagree. I think he is funny and you do not. Was not trying to ruffle your feathers. I also agree and stated as well open forum we are entitled ... take care

He is funny to me though, thanks again.

[AdlerGurl1989]

Do you have the rest of the show?

[damienpaulryan]

Priceless!!

[michaelrshea]

Paris Hilton?!?!?

FUCK HER!!!!

[RLFosse]

I so want this entire show on DVD!!!!

[TehRingmaster]

Oh god I loved Laugh Whore and Dad deleted it off DVR. Do you have the rest of the show?

[AlabamaAxeman]

I remember first seeing Mario on HBO or Showtime, and I think it was this show. He opened with this bizarre song and I said "who the hell is this nutball?" I resisted the temptation to change the channel and within 5 minutes I was pissing my pants in hysteria! I've been looking all over but I haven't seen the show since....does anyone remember what the cable special was called?? Thanks!

[broadwaybabe99]

yeah its called Laugh Whore and it comes on Showtime every once in a while. SO FUNNY!!!

[AlabamaAxeman]

Thanks BwayBabe...I appreciate it!

[helenajesstarzak]

I have seen this comedy show...

He´s brilliant of sounding like celebrites.

When he sang like Judy Garland I startet crying so hard!

[artemis709]

Barbara Streisand does have a thing with her hands..watch any movie of hers and she always acts with his super long nails fluttering aout

[CamiloSanchez1979]

this guy is a natural

[christentze]

i love mario. he's like a funny, cute little nervous bunny. i just want to hug him.  and his bette voice is ace.

[kyrtiz88]

What would he say for Sarah Palin?

Maybe something like: "My vagina is a real maverick!"

[christentze]

"My vagina's a hockey mom, just one of the real people. And how is it different than a bulldog? It wears lipstick."

i kid. :)

[incubus3889]

I saw him do this on broadway and I screamed out Bea Arthur, and he said, "My vagina will kick the shit out of your vagina!" He was great, and then saw him do this on Miami Beach, He is amazing!

[SmellyCatSally]

okay, as funny as this is, I just noticed something...the only person Mario ever listened to in the audience was a guy who constantly rattled off names, but he ignored everyone else's suggestions. I hate that this was a complete set-up, but it was still funny.

[SmellyCatSally]

omfg!! lmao!! this guy is actually really funny--im not usually a fan on stand-up comedies. this was awesome! thanks!

[varickwt]

LMAO...my vagina shiver and quivers, that was comedic genius!

[franman781]

is it just me or does his comedy style reflect that of Robin Williams just a bit?

[ShadowOdyssey]

OMG that was amasing...XDD Mario Cantone is awesome.

[meyster7]

This was unreal... Mario Cantone is amazing.... i wish someone shouted out Liza Minelli

[Sessyda]

Ah, I loooove Mario Cantone.

[reaper36000]

i love it when he says paris hilton? fuck her! hahahaha

[Sam4short]

I met Mario in Go Tell It To Mamma. I bought him a drink. He stared at me for half an hour. he said, "I`d take you home, but I`m a miserable bastard." I laughed my ass off.

[RLFosse]

I so want the whole video, but I haven't been able to find it! This show was genius!

[sweetTEA1980]

HAHAHAHA!! bear trap...SNAP :)

[ohmygod600]

lmao!!

i whant more videos of his stand up please

[texjoy86]

LOL Mario you DIVA!

[circlecityusa]

I just learned about what quief means and I think its awesome.

[MindFuxker]

"My vagina is a fucking bear-trap...SNAAP" xD

"Paris Hilton? . FUCK HER! " xD

[bmhde]

Julia Childs was the fucken best!!! lmfao

[WentMillerGal15]

I'd like him to do Celine Dion or Cher! Haha.

[SJWNYC2008]

Pisher of talent...On the heels of women because he can`t WEAR THEM !!!

[MusicJew158]

If I am that's fine heh

[MusicJew158]

Am I the only straight guy that loves Mario Cantone

[gregobassist]

me too brotha

[billygoyboy]

amazingly hy-stre-ri-cal!

[spikelilgirl]

I love Mario! :)

[siriuslydranged]

Bless you for uploading this! LMAO.

[lvatlenox]

I bet Joan Crawfords pussy was pretty clean

[muzzyvh]

He's cute as a button, as well as HYSTERICAL!!! So mad this hasn't been released on DVD yet! I saw it like everytime it aired on Showtime!

[geekyshoelaces]

man i wanted someone to say judy garland. his judy is amazing so is his liza.

[scotlegranail]

I LOVE MARIO!! :D