Three Best Lines from The Departed

[emmyi40]

did the guy just grab he's balls? 0:52

[DamienTepps]

@emmyi40 lol "the guy"

[jak44man]

boston dudes and sayin fuck yourself is like an asian guy in a car accident.... it always happens

[KesserCFC4eva]

DON'T LAUGH!

[drshnty]

This whole scene.

[popoff21]

It's like Shakespeare uncut they talk so fast, this movie is so epic a straight classic I'm glad they won an Oscar movie of the year

[funnafisa]

My fav personal lines that touched me really deep: Vera Farmiga: Talk about how you feel?

Leonardo DiCaprio: How I feel? How I feel? You sit there, with a mass murderer, a mass murderer. Your heart rate is jacked, your hand....steady. That's one thing I figured out about myself in prison, my hand does not shake...ever...

[ThePortalVision]

131 people are in the "dahk"

[aut0botsrollout]

"Unfortuantely this shit hole has more fuckin' leaks than the Iraqi Navy."

"Fuck yourself."

"I'm tired from fuckin' your wife."

"Hows your mother?"

"Good, she's tired from fuckin' my father."

That little segment had me DYING. XD

I love Wahlberg <3.

[muradist]

what he says at the end of vid, please someone, i really cant hear that clearlyy ))

[MrJelhi]

@muradist "I'm sorry to get you at the last minute, but things leak, this lead came from Queenan's undercover guy. I'm gonna get a smoke right now, you want a smoke? You don't smoke, do you? Right, what are you, one of those fitness freaks? Huh? Go fuck yourself."

[muradist]

@MrJelhi 10x! ))

[aaronpsamuel]

@Ynot707 they look like brothers, not sure about twins

[PJORDAN1985]

"Go fuck yourself"

[thijskole123]

idont know like mushrooms feed them shit and keep them in the dark

[CanYouRecord]

I love the two-faced faggot part. Lol

[HenryChrisKoRnfan]

Fuck yourself

Im tired for fucking your wife

Hows your mother

Good, shes tired for fucking my father :D:D:D

[grasd2]

"I'm gonna go have a smoke right now. You want a smoke? You don't smoke, do ya, right? What are ya, one of those fitness freaks, huh? Go fuck yourself." ROFL

[BiothDaSloth]

@grasd2 lmao That's my fav part, too.

[TheEighty84]

its workin......OVAHTIME!

[pelotom]

"I'm the guy who does his job... you must be the other guy."

[gogglespaezano]

@pelotom I'm the guy that gets the job done. You must be the other guy. ........ Next time pay attention, and go fuck yourself.

[pelotom]

@gogglespaezano Go listen to the actual clip, asshat. hark.com/clips/cdmkhwlbpl-im-t­he-guy-who-does-his-job

[Golden2Talon]

this has more views than the trailer

[zikkilover1]

@johnnycabb that's mean!

[Astroghouls]

I've always hated Mark's character in this film. Completely irrational, and just doesn't make sense...

[skuterixas91]

@Astroghouls

go fuck yourself

[arowerlikenoother]

THE END WAS AMAZING XD

[gotdamunchies1]

this reminds me of Dick Cheney...

[Shinigami88X1]

Mark Walbeerg and Matt Damon look alike

[2gDella648]

badass

[johnnycabb]

every time my wife ask me a question i answer with "maybe, maybe not, maybe fuck yourself"

[1bearcatf8f]

It's funny to boston cop's say fuck alot lol

[96dp]

Mark Wahlberg FTW!!!!

[bigdog7013]

"normally he's a nice guy dont judge him from this meeting alone" jeje

[megaboxxx]

they should just pile up all of whalbergs scenes!

[theburningpancake]

Fuck yourself,

I'm tired from fucking your wife,

Hows your mother?

Good, she's tired from fucking my father

*Matt Damon's facial expression*

[theburningpancake]

Maybe, Maybe not, Maybe fuck yourself

How about a smoke, you don't wanna smoke, what you one of those fitness freaks huh? go fuck yourself.

[DOGGEATDOGG03]

infernal affair is still better.

[dirosaga]

u missed 'in the marsh!' u fail

[nri222]

"This lead came from Queenan's undercover guy, howaboutasmokeyouwannasmoke youdontsmokedoyouwhatareyouone­ofthosefitnessfreakshuhgofucky­ourself"

[ComputerGamingBros]

Haha at 52 seconds he is grabbing his COCK

[dalesm]

Fuck yourself.

I'm tired from fucking your wife.

How's your mother?

Good, she's tired from fucking my father.

LOL

[sQLenore190]

emm...

[kachunwong628]

how about the one where jack nicholson said " not someone from john hancock goes every thursday, to get a fucking blowjob, don't laugh, this aint reality tv"?

[Dreadlord67]

This is why this is he greatest movie of all time.

[INF3darkgreen]

My new answer to everything: "maybe, maybe not, maybe go fuck yourself"

[BonitaLatina101]

lol

[TheEighty84]

ima go for a ciggaret you wanna ciggaret whattya one of those fitness freaks huh? go fuck ya self! lol and i cant wait to wipe that smile off your face......wouldnt you rather wipe my ass

[2gDella648]

;)nice

[jonboy1007]

"Marriage is an important part of getting ahead. It lets people know you're not a homo. Married guys seem more stable. People see the ring, they think at least somebody can stand the son of a bitch. Ladies see the ring, they know you must have some cash and your cock must work." ... "Yeah, it's working. Overtime."

[cuzaseso]

maybe... maybe not, maybe fck yourself! HAHAHA Best line ever!

[BillyTheBastardChild]

a good one is when matt damon says cocksucker "cawksucka"

[SenseiDonGraham]

huh you one of those fitness freaks? go fuck yourself

[tra789]

two pills? great... why don't you just give me a bottle of scotch and a handgun to blow my fucking head off.

[james0807]

surely this is in there watch?v=Wpc-zAbL2Uw

[mahavishnuxc]

The rules of every Martin Scorsese films:

1. Someone's gotta say the word "Fuck" every 2 minutes.

2. At least 2 Rolling Stones' songs must be played.

3. Some random guy has to get his ass kicked by one of the main characters.

4. At least one scene in the movie has to take place in a bar.

5. Someone has to get a blowjob, or talk about being blowjobing.

[TheJasonDR]

@mahavishnuxc you forgot the part where Martin Scorsese has to steal the movie idea from a hong kong movie

[mahavishnuxc]

@TheJasonDR he didnt steal it you idiot, it's a remake. he and another writer translated the script for an american/english speaking audience. that's what the movie business does. when a movie is really good, other countries remake it for their own audiences. if you dont even understand how the movie business, i suggest for you to keep quiet unless you like making yourself out to look like an ignorant fool.

[TheJasonDR]

@mahavishnuxc yeah but he made it look like its an original idea

[mahavishnuxc]

@TheJasonDR no he didnt, if you saw the movie, in the credits it says that it was based on a Korean film. for fucks sake, when Scorsese won an the oscar for best director he even said in his speech "I wanna thank the beautiful asian cinema that got me in this mess in the first place."

[TheJasonDR]

@mahavishnuxc yeah but most people dont know that....Id say about 99% of the people that saw that movie dont know that he copied it from a fucken great hong kong movie

[jackattackrox]

@mahavishnuxc I guess you haven't seen Hugo yet...

[RudeRuud10]

Dingam : I can't wait to wipe that smirk of your face.

Costello : Would you rather wipe my ass for me ?

By far the greatest line in the movie

[MrToaster1196]

"maybe fuck yourself" lol

[moviebuffreviews]

"I want a smoke I'm gonna go have a smoke right now. You want a smoke? You don't smoke, do ya, right? What are ya, one of those fitness freaks, huh? Go fuck yourself."

LOLOLOL

[StAndAl0neCompl3x]

I'm gonna have a smoke, you wanna have a smoke? You don't smoke, do you? What are ya wanna those fitness freaks huh? Go fuck yourself.

...I laughed so hard at that.

[cherrybombx27]

Probably the best Mark Wahlberg movie so far. He'll make some more damn good films, I'm sure. But he raised the bar with this one.

[zippyman818]

Midnight Run has more cussin' , I'm pretty sure.

The accents in this movie are wicked hahd.

Everyone is Boston is like, "finally a movie where people talk right." Meanwhile the rest of the country is all, "geez that Boston accent is harsh on the ears!"

[sixamsedna]

This video fails if it has no scene of Wahlberg imitating a fart. That's a line.

[Ichiboy900]

It's like they replace ending punctuation with "Fuck Yourself".

[ee345]

Yankee clipper

[NateElias9328]

Am I the only one who thought Baldwin was slowly going insane near the end of the movie? :)

[julionica]

This movie recorded the word "Fuck" in my brain thus making it part of my vocabulary. I'm fucked!

[jcoffey3]

i love these lines but I like Matt Damon's lines about the firefighters the most

[valdostastate77]

Politicaly, I can't stand Alec Baldwin but god damm he is funny. He stole this movie.

[Primetiime32]

"hows your mutha..?"

[Shorty20122012]

Hover your mouse over 1:01 and repeat for Ownage.

[Shorty20122012]

"maybe, maybe not. Maybe fuck yourself" lmfao These scenes are pwmage.

[cwrodgers12]

top ten movies to quote

[cyresgibson]

"i'm a peacock, you gotta let me fly!"

[ripcalwill]

This movie should have been given a special Academy Award just for the funniest, most obscenity-laden dialogue EVER!  Impossible to put on regular TV, but who cares. Some movies have gratuitous vulgar language and violence but it made this movie seem so real. No woman could have said any of these lines without sounding like a fool (Okay, obviously)...well maybe Ellen Barkin...I love Ellen Barkin!

[MMagentaHH]

i got under cover cops working, they're like fuckin' indians, you'll never see them

[ImGonnaGoHomeNow]

" you rise fast "........"like a 12 year olds dick" lmao

[MegaMaverick1994]

Alec Baldwin and Mark Wahlberg are the two funniest charecters

[BlackDynamiteNYC]

We'll start the script with "Go fuck yourself!", and then we'll go from there......

[JokeHotel]

You and I have almost exactly the same sense of humour mate :P This is literally a perfect video!

[ZenMasterT07]

One of my favorite is Costello's: "The Church wants you in your place. Kneel, stand, kneel, stand. If you go for that sort of thing, I don't know what to do for ya."

LOL. Hit it right in the head.

[BxJerseyShorefan]

Great movie. I never understood those random camera swings in the mid of the video

[7djsavage21]

just knowing the fact that before he was Mark Wahlberg, the famous hollywood actor he used to rap as Marky Mark i'll never be able to take him seriously!

[morphy671]

I'd go fuck myself for mark wahlberg any day

[canyoudigthisfood]

NO NO NO, the best line is when Marky Mark first meets Leo and asks if Leo knows what they do, then Leo says yes and Mark says, "If you knew what we do we would not be good at what we do, we would be cunts. ARE YOU CALLING US CUNTS?!?!" My quotes a little over inflected, buts "are you calling us cunts?" best line of the departed. Gracias.

[kakacarmenheath]

i dont know why i love hearing mark wahlberg swearing....it's just so funny to hear 'fucking' from him...he's so cute!! Ahhh....<3

[zoming4life]

FUCK YASELF



[WillemDafoeismyuncle]

wheres "who put the cameras in the fuckin place?" oh, who the fuck are you?" "im the guy who does his job you must be the other guy."

[jscottp99]

@WillemDafoeismyuncle Easily one of the top 10 lines of all time if you ask me.

[WillemDafoeismyuncle]

@jscottp99 oh, no doubt about it

[Clownface125]

maybe, maybe not, maybe fuck yourself

[ChuckNoarus]

@Clownface125 All it takes to get likes is to quote a line from this 1 minute clip? DayUYm! People are as easily entertained as a cat with a feather tied to a string

[Clownface125]

@ChuckNoarus Yea well, I just made the quote cuz it's a funny line, at least I didn't ask for thumbs up,

don't understand either why people are dumbasses, so I agree at the same point

cake?

[wazankash]

its a smoke within a smoke...

[24sk8rgrl]

"fuck yourself"

"im tired of fucking your wife"

"how's your mother?"

"she's tired from fucking my father"

[BradyReviewz]

There like fucking indians, your not gonna see em, your not gonna hear about em. LMAO

[kountPHERLOCKula]

haha i knew the alec baldwin line would be in there, i remember watchin the movie and laughing so hard when i heard that. what are you a fitness freak huh? go fuck yourself

[divebomber101]

"fuck yourself"

"I tired from fucking your wife"...

I love using that. Every time someone tells me to go fuck myself I reply using Mark Wahlberg's reply. Except I usually substitute wife with mother. lol. Thank you Marky Mark for a great comeback to an overused insult that lacks creativity.

[callumoakabywright]

Should of had "Who the fuck are you?" "I'm the guy who does his job, you must be the other guy!"

[TheBurgersBob]

0:23 no guy!

then 0:24 some guy? wtf

[goatkiller68]

@TheBurgersBob watch the movie. he walks in late. the guy who made this vid spliced the scenes

[Beccies]

@TheBurgersBob Its a different scene, just the same place

[siasorat]

are the two top best comments the same?

Answer: Maybe, Maybe not Maybe i should eff myself lmaooooo

[MadeInAsiaFilms]

@siasorat lolololol

[tminuyasha1]

"Fuck yourself." "I'm tired from fucking your wife." "How's your mother?" "Good.She's tired from fucking my father."

"Maybe.Maybe not.Maybe fuck yourself."

"I'm gonna have a smoke right now.You want a smoke? No you don't smoke,do yah? What,are you one of those fitness freaks,huh? Go fuck yourself." xD

[johnnytastetest]

What's not so great about the dialog in this movie is how it's so obviously scripted. Baldwin's line at the end, for example. No one talks like that unless they've read it off a page.

[TheKirkoswald]

@johnnytastetest not true dude my friends always talk this way ... its called quick wit

[keir193]

@johnnytastetest you've never been to boston

[Finglemctingle]

@johnnytastetest You clearly have not spent enough time in New England.

[space1patrick]

matt dameaon and mark whalajdaerg confuse me...

[hornick18]

What should have been in is this: "When you decide to be something, you can be it. That's what they don't tell you in the church. When I was your age they would say we can become cops, or criminals. Today, what I'm saying to you is this: when you're facing a loaded gun, what's the difference?"

[MidnightDandi]

I really wanted him to say the .line im the guy who does his job you muct be the other guy

[Aeris7]

Lol! "What're you, one of those fitness freaks. eh? Go fuck yourself." XD So unnecessary. <3

xxx

[Primetiime32]

hows your wife?

[gerishee]

Has anyone noticed that there's no one beside Matt Damon at the start of the scene and at 0.23, then some guy randomly appears at 0.24 and asks a question!

[accomplishedjoe94]

@gerishee the part where he walks in was edited out

[09032496]

ima gona have a smoke wright wana smoke hu you dont smoke do ya ha, you onea them fitness freaks go fuck ya self

[baboboi01]

Maybe, maybe not?, maybe fuck yourself.

[zoming4life]

FUCK YASELF

[cfwbdude]

the best is In the bar Cranberry Juice scene. Mr French told Billy straight out you aint at all tough, a masterpiece!

[IbteeDApunisher]

What's the point of these 2 top comments...nobody wants to read this

[FlamEmerge0]

u wanna smoke? u dont wann smoke? what r u? one of those fuckin fittness freak? go fuck yourself.

[GirlofanAlchemist123]

0:51 did Baldwin seriously just grab his NUTS?! O_O

[tdq11]

There were a lot more than three lines in this video.

[ingui007]

"Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe fuck yourself."

[NotMyIntention]

Lol yes, that's exactly what I imagine. A huge forge and Saruman whipping those ansty little slaves into shape. Of course I fucking don't haha. You're so out of touch it's insane. I imagine people doing a lot of hours and getting paid nothing. I'm not saying people shouldn't eat. That's my exact point. They get paid almost nothing for what they do and if you really cared about them and their diets then you'd agree with me that they need actual jobs that pay enough. You're an idiot.

[ezridax]

lmfao! classic!

[SuperMusicman777]

enjoy your clams, cocksuckers

[MegaMaverick1994]

Great movie. Matt Damon and Mark Wahlberg do look surprisingly a-like.

[9493760]

WHEN WE THINK OF CHINA , WE SHOULD THINK WITH PRIDE NOT COMPETITION , WORKING WITH THESE SPECIAL PEOPLE IS MORE ADVANTAGEOUS THAN OUTDOING THEM. THEY ARE SOCIALIST BUT STILL COMPETE LIKE CAPITALISTS . SOMETHING IS RIGHT IN CHINA.

GIANFRANCO FRONZI SEPTEMBER /5/2011

[NotMyIntention]

@9493760 lol Chinese propaganda. You know they employ these guys for less than a dollar an hour, literally to post pro-china crap on forums? WE DON'T BUY IT, CHINA. I'm sorry, we really don't. You're still oppressive to your people and savage enough to have kept the death penalty for menial things, among other ridiculous points on your country. Go away, propaganda man.

Anyway... yay Departed :D Favourite film ^_^ They're definitely good lines (Y)

[9493760]

@NotMyIntention WHAT YOU JUDGE THEM AND THERE LIFESTYLE , TO MAKE YOUR DECISION ?THIS IS THE TYPE OF PERSONALITY THAT CAN'T COMPETE WITH A SIMPLE CHINESE WORKER, SO HE PICKS ON LIFESTYLE . WHAT IF THEY NIT PICKED YOUR COVERED LIFSTYLE , THIS ISN'T HOLLYWOOD , THIS IS REAL LIFE . SO CRACK ANOTHER BEER SIT DOWN FLIP OPEN YOUR ANDROID AND WONDER HOW THEY MADE IT. GIANFRANCO FRONZI SEPTEMBER /11

[NotMyIntention]

@9493760 Lol don't shout. All I'm doing is calling them as I see them. I know the propaganda exists and oh, here's a random Pro-china comment ona totally irrelevant video o_O

AND yes I realise a lot gets made in China, but at what cost? The workers get paid nothing, they have to breathe in the toxic air the industrial revolution is pumping out, all for a few nice gadgets over here. I can live without them tbh, I can change my ways but China will still be as oppressive and FAKE as ever.

[9493760]

@NotMyIntention @NotMyIntention YOU MR UNGUIDED INTENTION , ARE EITHER FOOLISH OR YOUNG , YOU CAN'T APPRECIATE A PRODUCT BECAUSE OF HOW IT'S MADE . WELL HOW DOES SOMETHING LIKE YOUR I- PHONE GET MADE , BY SLAVE LABOR ? YOU JUDGE ME FOR MY APPRECIATION , AND YOU WANT TO YANK THE FOOD RIGHT OUT OF THEIR MOUTHS ?

GIANFRANCO FRONZI SEPTEMBER /11/2011

[NotMyIntention]

@9493760 Well firstly, I'm not a Mr., and I don't have an iPhone so stop making assumptions. You keep getting them wrong.

And yes I do think a lot of these things are made in near-slavery conditions! The workers get paid fuck all and you're poisoning the planet in the process. Your government thinks the world doesn't know this but we do, we're not stupid, and neither are the Chinese citizens who manage to get that information out to the world.

Yank food from who? Who's Fronzi? STOP SHOUTING lol

[9493760]

@NotMyIntention THE KEY WORDS IN THIS REPLY IS , " YES I THINK ". WELL , WHILE YOUR THINKING , THE PEOPLE OF CHINA HAVE TO EAT, ONE WAY OR THE OTHER , RIGHT ? AND DO YOU PICTURE SLAVING OVER A HUGE FORGE , BEING WHIPPED WHILE BEATING TOGETHER AN ANDROID PHONE ? I APOLOGIZE BUT SARCASM IS A FORM OF COMMUNICATIONS . GIANFRANCO FRONZI SEPTEMBER / 12 / 2011

[monkeynuts76]

YOU FORGOT THE SCENE ABOUT ASSES AND WIFFING

[TheTenaciousTim]

"go fahck yahself"

[mr2Rockman]

'Fuck you, fuckin' queer, firemen getting pussy in the first time in the history of fire or pussy. Go save a kitten from a tree you fuckin homos!"

[NotMyIntention]

@mr2Rockman Best line :D

[timoh437]

"I'm going to go smoke right now. You wanna smoke? You don't want to smoke do you, huh. You're one of those fitness freaks huh?. Haha, go fuckyourself."

HAHAHA

[brewer003]

like mushrooms, feed em shit then keep em in the dark....bahaha

[Vergedood]

Couldn't have chosen better myself

[jammylad393]

3 wait a sec then 1

[greg67101]

THUMBS UP IF YOU CAME FROM 30 ROCK

[diverseent]

" Want some coke?.... There it is...... lol

[AlGhaffar]

Maybe, maybe not...

[kieran1990able]

Mark whalberg made me roll on the floor in this part seriously......

[SmurfKiller66]

You do not wanna miss it if Costello takes a dump!

[chrisuno]

press 4 then 1 for lulz

[mrfixxxer118]

Press 5 to see alec baldwin looking at the camera. Go fuck yourself.

[030terror]

Maybe....Maybe not ....Maybe go FUCK yourself xd

[Jess9596]

" go fuck ya self" " I can't I'm tired from fuckin your wife" " good how's your mother?" " tired from fuckin my father" lmao Mark whalberg aced this film!!!

[mhaarc]

maybe, maybe not go fuck yourself haha, his character is great!!!

[MszReckDatFlow53]

damn this is vid got more views then tha actual trailer.. haha

[iJonko]

I'm about to have a smoke right now, you want a smoke? You don't smoke do ya. What are you one of those fitness freaks, huh? Go fuck ya self!

[templetonbob]

Go Fuck Ya Self

[arafat817]

1,867,046 people watched it