Autism - Indistinguishable #5

[MrSeth3158]

I grew up with autism and my father just yelled at me when I made mistakes or when I had trouble following commands. It is because of this I grew up with low self esteem and didn't understand why I was the way I am now. It was not until the age of 18 that I started to hear about autism and realized the similarities I had with autism (confirmed by a doctor). Autism gave me a lot of disadvantages, but it also gave me advantages. It helped learn how to play 5 Instruments and it helped me understan

[Elemarth]

Hey, these are really good. A lot more people should watch them.

And off to the side of your great discussion of autism, you explain what went wrong with the war. That's talent.

You should be doing something beyond making videos that only get 2000 views. Really. Write a book or something.

[triggeritchband]

With so much information out there for parents of autistic kids, you do a really good job of boiling it down and presenting something very succinct and articulate and easy to understand. My son is 7, diagnosed with Aspergers last year.

[shamin1991]

I totally disagree with trying to maake an ASD child act normal around. I think regular people should learn to tollerate them and understand them. I don't believe make them behve more like normal people is'nt good for them

[AnElephantThatPaints]

btw, I used to be kittiesrock46. Unfortunately I've lost all my videos, and I still don't have a video camera. I've stayed out of the autism loop for a year, but decided to return.

[AnElephantThatPaints]

Temple Grandin has a great insight on how she believes autistic children should be parented. She agrees that to make things fair, autistics should accommodate the NTs as well as the NTs accommodate them. She is glad that her parents pushed her to be polite though all the drills they gave her. A geek shouldn't be degeekified, but he should be made into a polite geek. Special interests should be channeled, not smashed. Otherwise, she would have never made it to the career of her choice.

[jon2xu]

hey Phil. your good at these kind of videos. hope all is well.

[deleahmarie]

i know you're not exaggerating. my son has been picked on so hard at school for his autism that he has been institutionalized for a couple of weeks due to depression and suicidal threats. i have so much knowledge about autism, yet apparently i dont know exactly the best method for treating the disorder because my son is still showing most of the same behaviors he was at age 3 and now he is 12. i know i wrote you a message, but i am viewing more of the videos now.

[phieq]

I always felt that you MUST work with whatever you're child has got. Stims, obsessions and special interest are all tools to motivate your child and teach him new things. As you say: teach the child to communicate and let the rest be. I find as I do this the autistic behaviours decrese and I understand the remaining behaviours better.

[Happyautism]

My boys flap, a lot. Its how they tell me if they are happy or exited I dont discourage it, because its their way of showing their glee, why would anyone want to suppress that?

The behaviours that cause a problems are the ones such as self harming, these I discourage and stop for their benefit.

No anoyance here phill, as you know, I agree 100% autism is not the enemy :)

[AnElephantThatPaints]

oh crap, I gave you a thumbs down when I meant a thumbs up. sorry!

Yeah, just worry about fixing things that could possibly hurt the children.

[Ninette111]

Phil I sooo agree that there are some autistic behaviors that you should encourage. I link your videos to all my new friends who reach out to me regarding autism and always post them to my facebook s well. I am still learning every day what to try to eliminate and what to nurture. Thanks for posting this!!

[PhilCommander2]

Thanks so much for your comment and for helping me with my videos!

[KimberlyMahurin]

Thank you phil for taking time and having the energy to do what your doing on youtube. Your point about the depression and insecurity is so important and yet its so easy to not think about when trying to help your child. We sometimes go into auto pilot on a mission. We also follow blindly when operating off of anxiety. Thank you for not being afraid to talk about what most people wont talk about in fear of stepping on someones toes.

[snorodent]

You make so much sense it's scary sometimes, Phil.

[FriscoF7]

I agree now can you send your video series to colleges around the U.S. so they can be played for teachers and therapists. I find there is a real gap between their book knowledge and really knowing what works for each individual child. Many just can't get away from the cookie cutter model every child will conform. It is so bad for them all the way around it breaks my heart.

Great Video.

[PhilCommander2]

Thanks FriscoF7!

I always appreciate/appreciated your support!

[CindyPDX]

Very good video with valid points. Thank you for sharing this.

[Neverstop4Jake]

Wow Phil- You have NO IDEA how much I needed this today! My son is 3 and through biomed/ ABA is doing great- in a regular preschool and mostly indistinguishable at this point. But he is only 3 so he can "get away" with certain things right now which I wonder about as he gets older. I have always been of the mind to parent him vs stomp out all autism and your video really clarified some things for me I was worrying about. Thanks so much!

[BumsenDK]

also:

Ive always been FOR teaching autistic behavior. Id consider teaching my child stimming/flapping (if i have a with with autism). just like if ur a white couple and adopt a black kid, ur not gonna comb the kid 24/7 or scorn it, if it does not have straight hair :)

[BumsenDK]

Hi Phil.

As always, something interesting from you.

I was glad to see you had a change of mind or whatever u want to call it :)

I also noted that some who do not udnerstand better, may misunderstand: depression IS very common for people with ASD, its the most common comorbidity -regardless of wether or not you are trying to create a "cookie cutter kid". I do ofc agree w. you that u do not want a cookie cutter kid;)

[PhilCommander2]

Thanks bumsendk,

i dont know that it was a change of heart or mind as much as it was just a realization that the facts are saying one thing and i am believing another.

:)

[mgdsTOS]

great video, phil!

[PhilCommander2]

Thanks!

[dlsgrl77]

i totally agree and love all your videos....your videos are some of the first ones i saw when i was finding out about my sons(2yrs) autism and they are very helpful.....this video makes me feel much better for embrassing the beauties and good things autism can bring..so many people see all of it as bad and its not...i do want to change some things but not all...so thank you and PLEASE keep doing what your doing...i luv it

[PhilCommander2]

Thankyou SO much for this comment!!!

[jon2xu]

Hey phil no , no kids myself but a good video.You put alot into yoour video's. -jon2xu

[PhilCommander2]

Thanks my man!

[666sigma]

Phil,

I really feel that this video is aimed at HFA/AS where the child is a "little" different.  In a nutshell what you are saying is support their strengthens and help them with their weaknesses.

It is no different than teaching the Shaq how to shoot free throws as opposed to trying to make him a point guard. You will never make the Shaq a point guard, but if you teach him to shoot free throws, you make him a more balanced player.

[PhilCommander2]

True, but many children who start out with autistic behaviors that arent very asperger like end up developing much more asperger like behavior...you could say that as parents make their children more indistinguishable more and more asperger like behaviors come out. I'm gonna talk about this in my next few videos.

[666sigma]

My guess is that you and I don't really disagree, but our definitions diverge,

I don't think there is a ASD spectrum and an NT spectrum. There is one spectrum and the bell shaped curves for ASD and NT do not overlap completely with the REAL WORLD bell shaped curve. This means that there would be many people that have autistic traits that do NOT fit neatly into either world.

ASD, like Cancer, has lumped too many peope together based on common traits, but different origins and outcomes.

[Serge165]

Philly, how have you been?

[PhilCommander2]

Hey Serge!

Been hanging in there...what else can i do right?

[Serge165]

I guess so :) I hope to talk to you soon although not much has changed over here....

[mikeymou]

Please expand on which autistic behaviors should be encouraged.

[PhilCommander2]

Behavior that should be encouraged depends on each individual child and why they are behaving that way. Take a look at my "Breaking the Pattern" video. The child throwing sand in the air is engaging in autistic behavior but the parent should encourage that child to be involved in that behavior and then should try and find other more appropiate methods for that child to see patterns in things. I will expand on this concept in the next few vids.

[PhilCommander2]

Another behavior that should be encouraged is when children get involved with their obsessions. Many parents try and remove the things their children are obsessed with from their lives...they dont want them to talk about it either. But sometimes you need to understand the drive in the children to learn about and talk about the things that they are obsessed with. I have no problem buying Jake things on the weather (which he is obsessed with). I encourage him to delve deeper into the weather.