Pt 8: Donna Williams reads Nobody Nowhere; Autobiography of an Autistic Girl

[7NTM61Ic]

You certainly have managed to overcome the stage fright. By the way, your hand movements while talking strongly remind me of the singer Dusty Springfield, who is famous for them and uses them to add depth to the lyrics of whatever she's singing. Here's an example on YouTube (add the front part of the URL):

/watch?v=IZip7Y_IDqQ

See what you think!

[LadyInsane96]

I love this, I thought reading the book was good, but hearing you allows me to see it from a whole new perspective.

[1210donna]

It is very odd too. I wrote the book in 1990, when I was 26. So it's a whole world away now. I couldn't have imagined reading it aloud then (I only read it once after I wrote it then not for some years before I dared read it again) and especially not on video (eww) but doing this now is therapeutic and makes it accessible to those who can't read it but also so many people project all and sundry onto my personality so viewing the readings they can reality check that :-)

[LadyInsane96]

daaaang 1990? If it was before October 31st I wasnt even alive then! Trippy!! It certainly takes alot of guts, can't wait for the rest!

[1210donna]

hilarious :-) I can swap you some arthritis :-)

[1210donna]

As I recall I wrote it around August 1990. I was in a pretty dingy London bedsit in Balham on the very top floor... the attic room. Fine place to go nuts and ironically a full circle given I'd been the loony in the attic as a kid too.

[LadyInsane96]

you and me both, sister!

[1210donna]

I can't imagine the choice. I've had immune dysfunction since 6mths old, was object blind, faceblind, meaning deaf and had tics from 2 and a half (had measles & mumps at 2, don't know if that contributed), and mood fits by 3, OCD by 9. So I don't know any different.

[7NTM61Ic]

If you had the choice, would you rather have been born without your differences? Do you think autism contributed to your artistic talents, or that they hindered them? Neither?

[1210donna]

I often wished I didn't have the health issues, I've often felt tormented by the co-morbids (except mania ;-) I sometimes felt deeply sad about the meaning deafness and I struggled hugely to understand or fluently use language until late childhood. But the agnosias definitely heightened my ARTism, by tuning me into movement and music and felt form, so did bipolar by heightening my sense of art and perceptions. And autism in general made me very Taoist, which is part of my ARTism.

[1210donna]

But exposure anxiety (compulsive involuntary avoidance, diversion, retaliation responses) made me deny and avoid artistic creation until adulthood because of fear of audience, fear of being known, of connection. So I resented that because I was deeply into sounds, textures, lines, form, movement, color, but couldn't dare show that directly, only 'autistically' (ie 'stimming').