Story Time: Target Women

[Kamikazebutterfly]

Milk can bring sunshine to a land devastated by your period tears! 

[motleyhar]

Oh fuck, that beeping noise hurt my ears!

[lovelyfairy27]

~sparkles~ oh how I miss this show :(

[FancyGrrl]

Cuz we all cry during our period and need a man to bring us a glass of milk...

[HelloImHenriette]

milk will also bring sunshine to a land, devastated by your period-tears..

[flux688]

come back to us, sarah haskins :'(

[Alliechan666]

I have no hope! I can't drink milk! Forever Alone.

[MiaStar]

yay veggie :) well, anyone can develop an intolerance (aka allergy) at any time, so theres not much you can do about that one other than just stop ingesting dairy now. theres no way for ppl to know if/when they will become allergic to lactose, but the fact that the majority of ppl ARE kind of sends up a red flag, doesnt it? and then we have companies like this friggin Cali milk group making it sound like milk/dairy is the only answer for calcium and protein...

[Geeforson]

@MiaStar Lactose intolerance isn't an allergy, it's an inability to metabolize lactose. An allergy is an immune reaction towards something, which is not what's happening in lactose intolerance. A reasonable way of telling if you'll remain lactose tolerant past childhood is to look at family history, since it's primarily hereditary (carried on a gene). And why would lactose intolerance send up a red flag? Lactase isn't needed past childhood in non-milk-consuming populations. So?

[MoebabFlundershuntz]

'milk will also bring sunshine to land devastated by your period tears.'

[housecry]

I've heard a woman's period called many things but never a tempest. The last ad was hysterical.

[MiaStar]

WTF milk is so gross and wrong, its full of PUS and causes so many problems! would you drink elephant breast milk? how about human breast milk (past infancy)? its a mucus secretion from another body. how gross!

[derwos]

@MiaStar and meat is the muscle and fat of animals...what's your point? They pasteurize milk, it's not like there's bacteria or anything lol

[MiaStar]

@derwos i guess you never learned about how there IS in fact bacteria, feces, and pus in milk and all dairy products, regardless of how many times its poorly pasteurized :) (rense.com/general26/truth.htm­) just one of many places you can read about the nastiness that is humans drinking bodily excretions from another species nipples. mmmm, caseines and pus... and yeah, muscle and fat, would you eat a human? :)

[derwos]

@MiaStar ahhh no im a vegetarian but I just don't want to become lactose intolerant. lol

[aclogue1980]

*.~** Sparkles!! *.~**

[khysmette]

PUAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAA!!

[vabvaab]

D:

[QueenoftheDookie]

Why just treat the symptom? Why not get to the source of the problem and take a pill that gets rid of those pesky emotions?

[WhatAWonderfulWorldF]

Sparkles!

[ggfanjase]

IN-SANE. I cannot believe those milk commercials got made, beautifully animated though they were.

[kupu2pagi]

TOO TOO DOO DOO

[IHadToComeYesterday7]

Lol She drowned a town with her tears

[PimpMyParadigm]

women have emotions that make them need deodorant BUT men take risks and need extreme deodorant protection, DUDE!!!

[number1fun2008]

0:00

[number1fun2008]

0:01

[Ollie7707]

i hope my prince brings me an iPad.

[Lyssame85]

hahaha milk will also bring sunshine ...

[mattachine]

The worst thing about the first milk commercial is it flat out states no one would marry her because she had ugly hair.

[PimpMyParadigm]

omg i cant believe i didnt catch that ! she cant get a man bc she has ugly hair so she need a man to CONQUER HER with HIS MILK!!!!!!!!!!hahahaha

[MiaStar]

@PimpMyParadigm i cant believe you didnt either. thats one of the worst ads ive ever seen in my life, its so incredibly degrading

[MiaStar]

@mattachine right? im incredibly offended that not only did the milk people think they could get away with pushing that bullshit, im offended that stupid people everywhere are going to buy into it! its so ridiculous

[BLACKIESBOY]

@mattachine

To be fair, it would be really hard to have sex, cuddle, or even tap your girlfriend's shoulder if she had snakes for hair.

[phryedbanana]

Kevin Kline does cream cheese. Classy.

[CresentSanctuary]

ok they said milk would help me grow...why should ibelieve it will help my hair and get me a prince . Love this segment! funny as hell

[Tesorazorz]

I never knew milk cured PMS. I guess I should put up with the bloating, constipation, and hives so I can finally be normal and get laid. Thanks milk.

[oneragingstar]

I find it hilarious when youtube airs ads targeting women before these clips.

[HopeIsMyOxygen]

Sparkles

[LadyOfMyth]

Wow, so have silky straight hair from cow's milk and get married. O.o who knew.

[XxPnuemaxX]

About the princess milk commercial, not to mention "you can get married if you have BAD HAIR!"

[TheMagical21]

"You did it, you made this boring sculpture."

hahaha

[Tinker13ee]

YAY milk Medusa got married. THERE'S HOPE FOR ALL OF US!!!!!!

[originaljawz]

I haven't laughed this hard in a few hours ... (since I saw sunny D and rum ... yum ... yum)

[Neverhooder]

Just an hour ago I had nothing to do. And then I found the Target Women playlist.

[noellesmart]

Does anyone know what song is used in the Philadelphia cream cheese commercial?

[melissa6295]

bring sarah back!

[EmpressAndrina]

And of course, I had to watch a yogurt commercial in order watch the actual video. Oh Google, thou does not comprehend internet humor.

[raizr]

Or it doesn't care.

[Nick7nick]

"You did it! You made this boring sculpture!"

Sarah, where are you?

[MCRgirl1314]

"Alright, so you have two more wishes. Lets just reveiw the wishes you've made so far. Number one was for.....canned croissants...." lmao

[escushion]

Your prince will come, and he will bring milk!

[xfronwenzyoucamex]

I know these comercials are sexest, but they are damn cute.

[StickWarrior]

This new 'Modern Lady' on Current is terrible compared with Target Women.

[azukar8]

Degree cares about your feelings, unlike the man you're about to marry!

[DarkAngelKisses13th]

0:30 I was going to say 'Who the goddamn hell sits on their desk like that?' And then I realized it was...a bookcase. WTF.

"Sparkles!" I love this woman.

[lovelylostlady]

i wish i had snakes for hair...

[xenophile84]

Oh wow...those milk commercials are awful on so many levels. So sexist. (And milk isn't even really healthy.)

[JustAPrayer]

Wow, I've never seen those commercials before, but they are CREEPY. I mean, seriously, not only does it insult single and happy women, it's also promotes shallowness. You know, maybe those snakes are hissing at the guys cause those those losers know nothing about inner beauty and judge the girl by her hair?

[jackienguyen454]

dgds

[hipp6y]

this is why i don't have a tv

[flowerpuff]

sparkles

[gorgeousaur]

I laughed out loud at the PMS-plagued kingdom.

[Neumie7]

milk will also bring sunshine to land devestated by your period tears. roflmfao

[dispozilla]

too bad i'm lactose intolerant ): gonna have pms and ugly hair forever

[MissPsychoB]

Haha, sometimes I wish I lived in America. I had no idea how idiotic the commercials there can get! lolololol

[Neumie7]

you havent even seen the one about the bedside gun rack lmfao

[bbbb666888888845]

@MissPsychoB Yeah, they're fun to tease, but you have no idea how badly growing up under the influence of values espoused by these cultures can fuck with your self-image. Thats why this show is a godsend for me.

[katya1993]

hilarious!

[Lolli9192]

What kind of cow were they uing for this and where the hell can I get one?!

[frymastermeat]

WTF? That milk shit is of the bull variety. I never caught those two princess commercials but I can only assume they were laughed off of the air.

[religiousfood]

This is extra funny because everything good you've been told about milk is a blatant lie

[alyssamjo]

YAY! MILK MEDUSA GOT MARRIED!!!

[savespashley8165]

*sparkles*

[BrokenPuzzle]

My sexism sense is tingling :O

[uranuspower47]

LMAO! I watched this 4 times already and I keep laughing at the same stuff! You rock, Sarah.

[midnafan101]

i reccomend the carls jr one that was the first one i watched and now im hooked on her show

[uranuspower47]

oh, that one is really fun as well! and the comments left by outraged guys are also hilarious, have you seen them?

[midnafan101]

yeah but i like rewinding the car wash scene hehe

[spagerbot]

What's so wrong with sensitivity? It just means your SENSING things. God, PMS rocks, you period-hating milk pushers.

[insanepoet9]

sparkles!

[1xleighx1]

Milk makes princesses fall in love with you! Just like that! The shock and horror of it all! : O

[spagerbot]

The princess's original hair was pretty frikin' sweet. What product can make snakes grow from my head?

[EarthlyMaidenLita]

@spagerbot I think it's natural. I was born with that kind of hair. Each strand has a brain, that's why it won't straighten.

[KatReaganomics]

Milk will also bring sunshine to a land devastated by your period tears.

[yesbutnotthat]

I can never think of anything to add to these hilarious observations...Sarah always says it all perfectly (=

[twistedoveryou01]

damn, milk cures everything

[SkinnyGirl125]

....Sparkles...

[lilj0070]

This woman is funny and shes right about marketing to women I wonder myself how more women arent offended by some of it

[pookkaaa]

sparklessss!

[MTbannanas]

lol is show craks me up

[jellybean262]

"Milk will also brink sunshine to a land devastated by your period tears" LOLLL

[Darby969]

Yay milk! *Sparkles*

[acapulco214]

These videos are a great way to expose feminist criticism to otherwise idiotic and oblivious YouTubing youth.

[rebel4thecolorbrown]

no need to sound snobby. Youtube will always be filled with idiots and reaching out will only be a lost cause making you look stupid

[acapulco214]

? ok..letting everyone fail is suuuuch a good alternative to putting any effort into making things change. 9_9

[rebel4thecolorbrown]

yes madam...that's what made us such a great nation. let nature change us, sure we're fatter and more intolerant towards each other but we still kick ass and inspire a sense of underdog achievment. change happens, it's nature and to force it can only bring bad things.

[reapercussions]

Pathetic.

[MiLiSHKA89]

@acapulco214 Word :)

[drawnseeker]

SPARKLES!!

[Nomorebiscuits]

I guess the glass of milk sparkled with her. That's so sparkly. Sparkles<3

[Infinitehope6]

You did it! You made this boring sculpture!

[roqt411]

hahahaha I lOVE the sarcasm in this

[soccercrayzee]

"sparkles!" lol

[lese627]

"A land devastated by your period tears." Friggin' hilarious!

[kidmecha]

Oh god the sexism... i love how Sarah just couldn't take it this time lol

[DanielSmith604]

SPARKLES!!!!

[Foogayzee]

*Thhparkles!* <3

[Calliope8802]

Hahahah Damn I love you Sarah Haskins :P and no I'm not gay

[MosesSlitsWrists]

Milk Madusa got married xD

[pentopia]

In fairness, those are some good croissants.  You don't even have to use your second wish on butter.

[Hugodastrevas]

women cliches are fun ahahahahahaha

[pretzelzetzel]

"I ate string cheese, and then I got invited to the bus boy's RV" hahaha

[Queenofotakus]

...I love this woman :D

[charleygordonFFA]

Sarah Haskins rocks!

[Elyazateran]

Actually milk gives me cramps when I PMS..

[HereForThePunch]

There once was this video about stories by Sarah Haskins. It was awesome. The end.

*sparkles*

[hotchicken360]

i just wet myself,

[kissfan7]

So sweat is symbolized by sparsly light woods, snakes, and thorns?

[happymerryjoygirl]

i love it when she says sparkles :) ^^

[MarlynHM]

Love the "period tears" & "sparkles~" *lol* Wow, we have really ridiculous ads these days!

[pedroganjabird]

you know what would be great in a womens ad?.... a pimp.. .. ey? think about it..

[Teganor]

The products within the ads fulfill the job.

[utoybabypa]

i get her point. love in general is idealistic and fairytalish, and somehow that is what we all want. but, life is so much more than that. love will just fill a percentage of who we are. reality bites and it leaves a mark

[selenagomezgirl2247]

"Sparkles..................."

[yupper99]

society of the spectacle.

[TatPeck3]

One more thing that first princess commercial had...did anyone notice the line about how the peasant "conquered the princess' love?" Yeah...

[lissheim]

Exactly, I was just going to comment on that. Cause love is all about being conquered and defeated! Uuugh.

[thesocialnerd]

lol. i think "period tears" is my new favorite phrase.

[VampireSeal]

Oh god, those milk ads are disturbing and offensive in so many ways. Is it really necessary to have a guy brink the milk? And where's the data to back up the California Dairy industry's claims? The milk industry talk about their products as if its a panacea. First it helps you lose weight, now it treats PMS and bad hair? It sounds suspiciously snake oil to me.Helps all your female complaints!

[Nalhovito]

Exactly, b/c all women love wise peasant men. FUCKING RETARDS!!!!!!!!!!!!

[beautifulbeast4]

Well said sarah! Thoses ads are so patronising and the music cuts through Me like a knife. The milk ads in particular are infuriating. I'am not Ameriacan so I don't know if they were complained about or not but I hope they were.

[laika2012]

i love the way she always says "product"

and i dont know why

[GoddessofEggrolls]

Freaking love the milk ones. xD "It can bring sunshine to a land devastated by your period tears!"

[K3v1nPr0]

that wasnt milk, it was a glass full of his semon =D

[jjjazzycraig]

period tears...i pooped laffing...sadly...true.

[otakuhime000015]

*waves hand* Sparkle

[BrasilGyrl]

Sparkles!

[SenseOrSensibility]

OH NO! A woman being SENSITIVE?! Everybody barricade yourselves indoors for the entire week!

Men cannot "heal" your PMS. Not even with milk. Exercise, avoid salt or caffeine, and okay, drink milk if that helps. And avoid watching ads like this if you can!

[0Krusnik0]

NUUU! Caffine saves moi D:

[Steeple333]

Amen. I've seen other California Milk ads (I weep for my state... not period tears, though) with the same "milk will stop teh wimmins from being bitchy! .D.b"

You're right about the exercise, though. My cramps became less stabby when I started working out.

[OonaCanute]

Wow, I cannot believe how shameless and stupid those California Milk commercials are.

[BrasilGyrl]

Did you notices the father and the cow during the wedding?2:13 to 2:16

[Outrajess]

WTF at those princess ads, how are they even allowed on TV?

[xQueenKristinx]

LOL god i love these segments. theres still so much sexism in the world, lawlz.

and not just sexism against women either, there are a bunch of male stereotypes too. mind you they tend to be a bit more positive than female stereotypes, lol

[stillcountingsheep]

Sarah Haskins. So hilarious.

[katita87]

LOLLL funny...

[saucemeister123]

you're subhuman you douche

[vintagesoul221]

"milk will also bring sunshine to the land devastated by your period tears"

classic.

[Mcneofita]

omg i love her

[loler4eva]

OMG LOOOL. love her show

[hentaikiller]

SPARKLESSS

[recoilition]

This girl is sooo fuckin hilarious!!!! Love u sarah

[jtoptimistic]

ya shes great

ditto on being like sarah from CH

both perfect examples of real women

has she been in anything else?

[RavenSunnyD]

lol

[lolyypop11]

i hope when my man brings a fun products its a condom :P

[Axelgirl0028]

o-m-g this has been my favorite Target Women

Brava! Brava!

[mixxycan]

Exactly what I was thinking with the canned croissants; at least wish for fresh baked!

[peacemaker02]

i have to say that you are SO FUNNY. i love this channel but this is so my favorite feature.

[xFOBxPATDx]

she reminds me a lot of sara(h) from collegehumor.

sparkles! :)

[CanSpy]

I love her "Are you fucking shitting me?" look when she hears about the PMS one. Thank you, Sarah, for saying what the rest of us are thinking. Fucking douchebag advertisers.

[0justBETHANY]

ahhhhh.... favorited :D

[jonapello245]

She looks like a woman version of nicholas cage.

[honeyhued08]

yes she does Jona, but at least she gets to be pretty, :)

[jonapello245]

Are you calling nicholas cage cute?

[honeyhued08]

not at all. That's why I said "at LEAST she gets to be pretty" lol!

[KaosZomB23]

...sparkles...

SHWING

[Lxkill]

I always laugh to target women and I'm a dude, haha, sarah haskins is hilarious.

[kgonepostl]

Sarah Haskins!

MARRY ME!