Added: 2 years ago
From: StephanKesting
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  • your kidding right?

  • Even a child could tell you that no matter how could you are at martial arts blocking a 2 handed baseball mat swing would hurt like fuck.

  • i can do those techniques... yesterday i was dreaming about them... oh right, dreaming...

  • the guys who invented those two technics , were under overdose of chuck norris's movies .

  • the bat technegue is fro a book called "korean karate" and have a nice day mr. ninja ~~

  • Dunno about a strike, for the first move, but the broken bat shard and broken arm'll make for a pretty good chain whip style attack, lol. I'm sure a dedicated ninja could do the other move- given innate ability and several hundred hours of dedication...

  • hahahahahaha wtf i'm better than him is he martial art?

  • Now I thinking about the first technique, how would you hit somebody with half of the bat? XD

  • I've been practicing the ninjitsu technique you describe but is there a way for when you're dropping the knife to keep from stabbing yourself in the foot? My mom is going to kill me if I have to go to the hospital again.

  • i tried his technique..i snapped my arm instead.

  • i like how he sais train up to an aluminuim baseball bat^^ sooo cool!

  • Hey, of the trick with the knife really works than it would be pretty cool though :P

  • Wow good form but it is truly the worst techniques ever the first one you'll end up, if it could posible be done right, with 2 broken forearms and the second one end up dead!

  • @genosinclair!!! Moron??? Lmao your ignorance shines buddy!!! Apparently you're the next coming of Bruce Lee huh ya douchebag!!!

  • I've got nothing against martial arts for teaching techniques - if people want to play at being ninjas then good on them - but as long as the students know that there is play and reality. Great techniques btw lool

  • Tae kwon do is the first one lol, Glad i do jeet kune do. Funny vid :)

  • This has to be a joke!!! What a moron....he must have taught himself like Danielson did in The Karate Kid... This guy is a disgrace to all Martial Artists..

  • @duckie231 He's being sarcastic, you fucking moron. Science could learn a lot from people as dumb as you.

  • i block baseball bats with my arm all day! perfect technique

  • How can this have so many likes...I don't get it...this is just ridiculous.

  • NInja is not a martial art jajajaja

  • @plus24seven No, however Ninjutsu, is.

  • @cynicismSteve - as I said! Ninja or Ninjutsu is not Martial arts..jjajajaja Shinobi or Ninjas learn different martial arts such as Jujitsu or what ever jutsu they have there,, there is no such thing as a Ninja martial art..! or a hidden Ninja arts:P ,,..

  • I would catch the bat in my teeth... for shock value... then spit the splinters into my opponent's eyes.

  • It all sounds like Ashida Kim to me. Ashida Kim was amusing, because he must have used US military training manuals from special forces for some of his tactics and techniques info and put black Pajamas on them (because some of the stuff is correct), and then just watched a bunch of a ninja movies and made a bunch of shit up and sold it as Bullshido Ninja stuff. Remember, a portion of Kims stuff is legit (10-20%), but none of it is based on real Shinobi at all. Antony Cummins IMHO gets it best.

  • Hey jerky boy, if you block a bat like that you have just successfully broken your arm. Good job! So those 4 other useless moves can't be done!! Please do not contribute to martial arts. Young impressionable boys might try that dumb crap you just said to do.

  • @isys2244 Do you have comprehension problems? Are you high? This guy in this video is teaching everyone a valuable lesson on what NOT to do, and he spends the first minute almost explaining that... OMG... DUMBASS!

  • That knife thing has got to be ashida kim

  • He can't break a bat with his forearm? That's 101 where I come from. Next step was stopping a sword with your eyelashes.......gosh I miss the screams

  • LOL....

  • trololol your not a ninja.. ninjas are black. :(

  • Good luck on your next "ninja mission" ;-)

  • My moms style of bedroom slipper technique will destroy all attackers. 1,000 slaps of death!!!

  • Hahahahahaha... 

  • you've been watching TOO MUCH KARATE AND NINJA MOVIES,

  • if anybody can break a baseball bat with their arm, post a video of it, ill send you a million bucks

  • @brotherbear000 I'll do it for $26

  • I would just use my ki to stop the bat, then I would follow up with the pink touch of death.

  • lol : step 1 > broken arm :: step 2 > foot slashed .. The no good assassin would just sit back and let you take let you take yourself down .. lol .

    Step in both times

  • hahahaha

  • Dude, just ASK A NINJA...

  • is this serious¿?¿? WTF

  • hahahaahhhahha THE MAN IS KING!!! and you all are retards...hahahahahhaha

  • The ninja that spent 30 years perfecting that technique WILL NOW ANGRILY KILL YOU WITH THAT TECHNIQUE for dishonoring him.

  • at least one of these techniques works ive done the second one before

  • Okay, bear with me for this, I'm being completely serious. If I can block a bat with my arm so easily, why not just block it with my face and punch him in the throat? I apparently run no risk of brain damage or serious injury, so why be all fancy and do extra work?

  • a real ninja would just visualize the knife hitting the guy and it would happen - least is probably what askaninja would say :) Or.. use his jedi mind control to block the bullet from leaving the rifle ha ha lol.

  • @1magicdude Mind control isn't telekinetic.

  • Would totally work for Ryu Hayabusa.

  • Someone swinging a bat at you and you defend by using your arm? That already you know won't work... Don't go by the books!

  • the guy is makeing fun of techniques....he's not serious...those are actualy shity moves that he happen to see in martail arts books and magaines

  • The block itself is present in some karate styles.. however it is ONLY used when doing "kata"- a set of moves, a sort of theory practise. Nobody, at least in normal karate styles tells you to apply it in a real fight in its "kata" form like you have showed, and especially not against a baseball bat!

    Ninja technique...no comment ;-)

  • if you are an true ninja, he could not see you from the beginning?

  • ahahahahahhaha =) that's very smily. he laughtung sometime in video =)

  • The worst technique I ever saw was if someone attacks you with a baseball bat, you throw termites at it which turns it to dust.

  • what the.... so! happy I don't go to this guys class. You know you are destined to have you ass kicked, or should I say, beaten fuckless with a stick a carved up like KFC in a real situation lol man... seriously...

  • Dude, just because you don't have l337 n1nj4 skilllzz.

  • xD hahahahahaha the second technique is the best EVER XD 

  • Alright, err buddy need to calm down on Jopo1226, if you check his channel, he is an EXTERME video gamer....you can figure the rest out from there. So cut him some slack.

  • Stephan, brother I have seen even worse than this....it blows my mind why people will swallow this crap when common sense alone would show that in real-time, real-power, real-pressure these "techniques" (shamiques) will not work and worse will get you seriously hurt. I recall one guy at a Seminar showing me what he said was an impenetrable spin kick. I laid him on his ass from midair and had him scream mercy in front of his students. Charlatans run amok!

    Best wishes and keep training!

  • I don't want to be a ninja I am.

  • hmmm, yea I think I'll take my chances closing the distance...I'm pretty damn big so I'd use my size to my advantage and try to get the opponent on the ground and take away the effectiveness of the bat (assuming its just a street punk startin trouble). The reason I would try to do that because most people's first insticnt is to swing...which might give u a chance to duck the swing, get ahold of the opponent and drive him to the ground. Just my first thought.

  • I used the first technique once was unconditioned reflex because its a karate defence i learned, didnt try to break the bat haha, instead finished with a punch in his face, with him collapsing down because was staight jaw hit, had a bruise in my arm next day so its a bad tecnique against a bat or wood only useful unarmed at the very last moment.

  • @Daokwan Very lucky you didn't break your forearm.

  • thats some awsome stuff and funny 2 boot

  • The first one is kinda from the show Kenichi: The Mightiest Disciple. XD

  • This is hilarious! Well done Mr. Kesting!

  • Where he went wrong was trying to learn from a book. I've personally seen BOTH of these techniques work. But you must learn from a true master. It requires hours of waxing cars, painting fences, and throwing jackets on coat racks.

  • finally some logic regarding martial arts. someone that knows bs martial arts when he sees it.

  • lollllllllllllllllllllllllllll­lll ;/

  • This is a lie, both of these techniques work.... When surrounded by atleast 4 camera man and a director.

  • really!! Where saw that, TT...

  • Martial arts is a scam and BS. Why the need to be barefoot? Obviously the most likely encounter is going to be on the street with shoes on. Anytime someone fishy get close to you start coughing and act like you have an infectious disease like swine flu and tuberculosis. Karate seems like a class with a teacher who has a foot fetish. I took Karate for less than a month yet I have yet to encounter someone who will mess with me. I don't bare arms or anything I just scare them with illness and kink.

  • @Jopo1226 Its called martial ARTS for a reason. The Gi and Barefoot parts are the whole tradition and Art part of it. Btw if someone really wants to beat your ass he'll just punch through your coughs. Not only that, I think I can easily use my 10 years of scammy bullshit karate training to kick your but back to hospital.

  • @Jopo1226 You're an idiot; being barefoot has about four good reasons; 1- Kicks with shoes hurt more than barefoot, and you don't want to abuse your training partner any more than necessary, unless you're an asshole. Two- You have better balance/coordination barefoot. Three- Tradition; they didn't have shoes when these arts were being developed, dipshit. Four (And the best reason)- SANITARY REASONS; nobody wants you tracking dirt and dog shit all over the mat, that's how skin infections happen.

  • @GenoSinclair I'll vouch on that :). Heck, I like hiking barefoot - I'm by no means Cody Lundin, but in the old days before people worse shoes so commonly , humans had healthier feet. And that's a scientific fact.

  • @GenoSinclair

    1. If you kick someone and you don't injure him, you're doing it wrong.

    2. Yes, you have better balance and coordination, and then when you actually find yourself in a violent situation, you are handicapped. Smart -_-

    3. tradition doesn't mean shit when someone's trying to kill you. And there's nothing traditional about sport martial arts anyway.

    4. yeah, who needs those nice training shoes when you can get your sweaty feet all over people? :P

  • @dragonking700 Dude, you're fucking retarded. No decent fighter attempts to hurt their training partner; that's a fucking douchebag move. You should be able to kick someone and NOT injure them, dumbass. Shoes in a streetfight aren't a handicap, cause they protect your feet from rocks, glass, ect on the ground; stuff you don't have to worry about in training, cause you're on mats. Shoes also tear up mats; and they're expensive and difficult to replace.

  • @GenoSinclair

    I'm simply stating the truth. If you train to 'kick' someone instead of training to 'injure' them, when your life is threatened and violence is the only answer, you will not be able to injure them. Obviously, you need to find a way you can practice in injuring technique without injuring someone, and sparring doesn't do that.

    First of all, 99% of "traditional" martial arts taught today are not traditional at all. People created martial arts to protect their lives. (continued...)

  • @dragonking700 To continue; your remark about tradition is completely irrelevant; the point of tradition is that you continue to do it the way it's always been done, in this case, shoeless. Martial arts is PURE tradition, some arts have remained virtually unchanged for centuries now. And as for your reply to number 4... You must have brain damage. Your feet are cleaner than the soles of your shoes. I'd rather have sweat on me than staph infection, thanks. Use your fucking brain in the future.

  • @GenoSinclair (...continued)

    The purpose of a martial art is to learn how to use violence effectively and responsibly as a means of survival, not a sport.

    And the reason people train barefoot is because in most asian culture, you take off your shoes inside. Many people walked barefoot also, or with minimal protection of their feet. Today, people wear shoes. Bruce Lee made his students train with shoes for that reason. And in Chinese arts, they always wear shoes anyway...

  • @dragonking700 If you train correctly, it's easy to cross the line from "training with your buddy" to "fight off an attacker." It's not hard to put your full force into a kick once you can kick well. 99%, you say? I'd really like to see where you got those statistics from. And who are you to dictate the purpose of martial arts? I wasn't aware that martial arts weren't suited for sports. Guess that whole sport of MIXED MARTIAL ARTS was a big mistake, eh? Go home, kid...

  • @GenoSinclair Your third reason is retarded, but the others are perfect.

  • how ever it will work for a ninja!

    and im not kidding you,because a ninja will have the fighting experience and hardness of block weapons,for hes a weapon fighter himself!

    and expect the armour around his forarms will be made of leather and metal for blocking weapons as sharp as a samurai katana!so,yes,expect a ninja to block any weapon in that range,if anything else is imposible!but for a unarmoured martial artist,i wouldnt recomend that move either,ouch!!the knife move is so redicilous!LOL!!!

  • hello,and thank you for your interesting video!just want to comment it a bit!the first self deffense seriel move contra the baseball bat,is a karate move/moves practiced in almost every karate style available outthere!

    i have been practicing karate in my teenage days and have a blackbelt en kyou kuoshin karate/brownbelt saido kan fighter,and praticed also shoto kan and kenzaryou karate,and all of them eccept from the fullcontact style of the saido kan whos from kyou koushin ,uses the block!

  • stuff like the stupid books that people write are on of the reason martial arts has a bad name in terms of how effective it is. people dont like the simple stiff that doesnt look cool but works. they would rather try the stuff they see in kung fu movies.

  • This guy is a comedian or something right?

  • My self defense instructor in the 80's used to teach a two day session on the "myths of self-defense". There are hundreds of these worthless techniques that practiced with complete conviction. Thank you tae kwon do for wasting so many people's time and energy! Other worthless techniques-windmill motion against choke. Almost all high blocks. Cross block against knife or most any weapon.

  • @Here2ownU

    And let me guess, your instructor was some overwheight ex army guy who's never seen unarmed combat before in his life, and just taught you a whole bunch of new magical techniques that will save your life...

    Not that what you said isn't true. But the reason most martail arts schools are full of bs isn't because of the techniques they teach, it's because of the mindset they teach. If they taught the right mindset, all the realistic techniques would come naturally.

  • @dragonking700 No. My first instructor was excellent and fell outside the mold. He came from a military back ground and re-enlisted and went on to teach hand-to-hand in the army. My second instructor was pretty good but was wholesale into the "mind" thing and a purest in nature. Martial arts is how I trained in my off season from wrestling in college and at the international level. I found it relaxing and great for focus and flexibility. But in defense, grappling was best for me.

  • no way are you blocking my baseball bat with your arm. It'd make me happy to see someone try.

  • i remembered these moves when my wife forgot to cook dinner that will teach her

  • I dunno about you guys, but the ninja technique works a treat, I do it all the time. I was once always robbed at gun point, the ninja anti-gun defence helped change my life. 9.5/10

  • Thanks so much for this video. My grandmother tried to beat me with a baseball bat and let's just say it didn't end well for her. I broke the bat instantly when I hit it. I was scared though because I did the spinning back fist and she still stood there. Thankfully I remembered the spinning back kick and I sent her flying. Thanks for the video!

  • what happens if it is steal

  • i'll just use a gun..

  • is this serious??

  • Asian!

  • That was awesome... i want to see some old timey english stick fights now :}

  • Never bring a knife to a gun fight

  • Pointless video 

  • Cheap manga martial arts. Bwahahahahaha

  • DO NOT block anything with your arm!!! Try kick to the groin, poking the eyes and running away in a street fight or you'll end up in the ER for sure.

  • @Kkunchev Thnx for clearing that out, captain obvious!

  • @SelfPL My sidekick Trollboy speaks again. Shut up bitch and know your place.

  • Chuck Norris.... Thats it. Need I say more?

  • @trigger5332 stupid comment

  • I used the second technique last week on my secret mission to --Censored-- where I took out --Censored-- and cut off his --Censored--. If you know how to do it, the technique works great, but you need to find the right teacher. I got my ninja training at --Censored-- where we --Censored-- with --Censored-- and shiny black leather.

  • The first technique they taught me in TKD, the idea (or at least how I was told) was that as long as you block the blow at an angle that it won't break your arm. It's so much more manly than closing the distance and taking your opponent to the ground.

  • @creslinz69 So much more manly than closing the distance and taking your opponent to the ground? WOW dude, too many karate movies right? I'd rather do something that is actually effective than do something "Manly" as you say and get your arm broken. If i am swinging a baseball bet at your head, i don't care which angle you use to block it, I AM FUCKING YOU UP.

  • he sweat under the armpits thats mamly

  • I actually used a technique in a real street fight similar to the first situation. A guy swung a stick, I used the upper block, and disarmed my opponent, then kicked to the face with a roundhouse instead of a back kick. I was following into a back kick, but then changed into the roundhouse because I did not want to turn around. I had a badly bruised forearm for a couple of days, but it worked. When I think back, avoiding the blow by creating distance may have been best for me.

  • Sounds like a really bad application for a pretty good defense (as far as the bat goes). And I don't even know what to say about the knife thing.

  • hahahahaha

  • ESE MEN NUNCA ESTUBO EN UNA VERDADERA PELEA EN LA CALLE

  • What? That baseball bat is absolutely correct! You block it, you punch trough it...than comes the roundhouse kick, and then..you take the guy down with your beard! Thats how Chuck Norris does it!

  • Oh, Ashida Kim...Where would we be without your martial arts comedy? lol

  • good lessons , very similar to my sith training, sans the light saber 

  • next technique... block a sword or knife with your laser eyebeams..

    (hey it's JUST as plausible as these two.

  • AHAHAHHAHAHA!!! This is such a troll video!!

  • lol

    

  • Unless you know how to use QI (so the Shaolin say) the first technique is gona spli your arm in a half (trust me, I already saw that) the rest of the technique is pretty good. I used to do a variety of that "break, spin and hit" against staffs (suposed to represent spears) and it works good.

    As for the second...... never saw something that "dumb looking" but it might work

  • @nsdgvsdhfhjdfbd  Your living in a fantasty.

  • @Barry52811 To be honest, I don't believe on that part of my comment. I only put it there cuz (just like the guy of the video) I heard of it.

    So don't judge my mental sanity so fast okay?

  • The first defense will likely brake your arm. Any moderately capable man would swing hard enough to snap it like a twig.

    Once someone attacked me with a baseball bat, but when he swung i dodged and grabbed the bat, an arm drag and I wrapped up his arms from behind.

    I next souplexed him(dont know how to spell it), his collision was so great with the ground that he couldn't move.

    My experience, amateur mma, collegiate wrestling, and street fights, and being high school baseball player.

  • I only see one flaw with the first defense. What if your attacker is also trained in the same method? Then when you deliver the spinning back fist he will block your half of the bat, break it in two and then hit you with a quarter of a bat. This would just repeat indefinitely until you are hitting each other with wood atoms so I think it is a bad defence.

  • @BillORele LOL

  • @BillORele

    you mean, besides blocking a baseball bat solely with your arm? you didn't see that flaw?

  • @BillORele You are a genius xD

  • @BillORele You sir, made my day. Thank you.

  • @BillORele, hahahahaha.. lol

  • @BillORele ohh my good thats flipping hilarious!!!! you sir are a scientist!

  • hahha awesome!!! X-D like bruce lee said " apply what is useful, discard what is useless" he clearly points out the meaning of useless in this introduction. not even chuck norris would pull that off.. and that says allot X-D

  • lmfao this is so practical ill use these next time im bullied

  • oh no! you have ruined my dreams, of blocking aluminium bats swung at about 80 mph with my thin bones in my arms! Body mechanics / physics is one of THE most important if not the most important aspects of martial arts, your Video made me laugh, thank you :)

  • If I were going to take a full swing at you with a bat and you tried to block it with your arm, you'd end up with something broken. lol'

    I think the smart thing to do is keep a distant and wait for him to swing than go for a take down. If you're looking for something that can really protect you, go learn some Ju-Jitsu. And if someone comes at you with a shot gun, just get on your knees and give them what ever they want, haahhaha.

  • Beautiful! You've just brightened my evening.Thank you!

  • 2:24 - " So i' m T-rex..."

  • @PlatnumBitches ROFL XB

  • LOOOOOOOOOOL

  • hahahaha that ninja probably was a cousin of chuck norris :D

  • ROFLMAO! This is awesome

  • i use to do this techniques but then i took an arrow to the knee

  • Well this is totally logical. You would have to use your feet for the second technique because you would have a broken forearm from the first one.....

  • @crocketgsxr6

    Probably two broken forearems

  • @crocketgsxr6 ...That's kind of the point, the vid title sorta gives it away and the fact that the guy is saying these are bad moves not good ones....so uhh...why mention the obvious. Worst thing is you got 26 thumbs up, so I'm guessing they are not that bright either.

  • @Shadowlooker12 Someone doesn't understand jokes.

  • omg lol...

  • jiu jitsu is not a self defense martial art. thats what cravmaga is for

  • @sleapyrusher How is it not self defense? We teach it to our law enforcement and military.

  • @sleapyrusher How is it not a self defence martial art? You are mistaken.

  • A technique isn't bad just because you can perform it, however these 2 were just awful.

  • hahahahahahahahhahahahahahahah­ahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!

  • I laughed my fucking ass off the second one, omg... xD

  • awesome....

    

  • Comment removed

  • @TotesMagotes hes being sarcastic..hence WORST techniques

  • @TotesMagotes This is for fun....

  • @TotesMagotes you sir, are an idiot.. -_-

  • i STILL want to be a ninja

  • WHuauauauaaha next technique is learning to fight with one arm?

  • dude....it would be much easier to break the bad if it was moving super fast towards you. increasing the force exponentially. Also...you could also pick the knife up with your toes and stab the opponent. seriously

  • I think the hadouken might be more effective than the second one.

  • I used to use those moves, then I took an arrow to the knee.

  • I think nk best martial art techiniqu is to

  • he is moving like mister bean

  • "Go back, we have to do this properly."

  • LOL I used to read black belt magazine as a kid ,I remember stuff like this.It was always two black n white pages towards the back.

  • Lolz

  • lets face it - if you pulled the first one off no-one would bother you.

  • even though these are pretty horrendous, i think the stuff that kiai master did are even worse, where he takes out his opponents by screaming at them

  • at least the first technique looked believable

  • Well obviously these basic Ninja skills will seem impossible to outright dangerous to the average human's like all of you. But in my school we learn these what we call baby moves as children. I can kill a man a hundred ways with just a stare. And its not advisable to even look the direction of master Chuck Norris.

  • I can personally say I've hit both of these moves in training.

  • гавно нахуй !!!!!!!!!

  • @Johack345 а забыл ПЕРВЫЙНАХ!!!!!!!!!!

  • hahha, seriously tho... stay of the bloo