Earnest Goes to Anime (2/4)

[Anthony3PO]

12:28

holy shit, whats wrong with her legs?!!!

[EXslowbro]

Yeah, I remember the part of Nausicaa where there was a giant chain and a lego crab monster.

[fakeplasticball]

If you have watched "Nausicaa: valley of the wind",(Hayao Miyasaki film), when you get to the china level it is a carbon copy of that movies underworld sequence.

In the movie a poisonous/cancerous forest is sheltering, cleansing and purifying a sandy water cavern under the forest floor or in the case of this game... it's just china.

[EternalGuardian07]

This game is hilarious

[TheThreadWeaver]

13:13 I know it isn't, but that ship REALLY looks like the titanic.

[ZBlayde]

Oh dear god, THERE ARE TWO OTHER GAMES LIKE THIS. D:

[xxxYouTunesxxx]

This has got to be on the Turbo Duo right?

[xxxYouTunesxxx]

You guys are fucking hysterical...love your videos

[rocky5768]

'jail by tim buckley.'



[fault3k]

Earnest Evans 2 Earnest Evans goes to white castle

[DarkBahamut]

Wow, they based a level off Nausica: Valley of the Wind.

[Foxboy106]

this is hilarious, but i can't watch any more. the games so bad it makes me cringe in a painful way

[mbonnar]

You guys and Howard C Neal = greatest youtube video commentary in the Sol system.

[06hatter]

IM TRYIN TO CLIMB THESE STAIRS!!

[SQUIZZLER24]

Nottingham and Dorchester are not generally the two most important cities in the UK, Wolfteam.

[RedSuperSonicNinja0]

Wait a minute. Peru to California to Japan to Vietnam to India to Pakistan to Egypt to Switzerland? WTF?

[grottypissedstained]

6:35

I'M HERE TOO

[SQUIZZLER24]

@grottypissedstained Brilliant user name.

[wariothehedgehog]

What gets me is that Earnest goes to France, and there he's on a train fighting Al Capone's men before heading into some sort of crime infested city full of thugs who look like Guile. Now, I'm not an expert on Prohibition era geography, but shouldn't those levels be in the US?

[JanitorAntisocial]

See, shit like this wouldn't happen if Project Wolfteam were smart and hired something to handle continuity like Last Alert did.

[thinBillyBoy]

That's France!

[noodlezombie]

I love the somewhat dubious geography of the world map.

[DorianCairne]

From what little I can tell, this game really seems to have a pretty generic, Indiana Jones-esque, "collect all these idols that destroy the world before Evil Blonde Tranquiliser Girl does" plot. All the bizarre enemies don't seem to be explained, they're just kind of there to give the player something to do. Laaaaaazy, Wolfteam.

[MellowMink]

Can somebody please explain this game's plot to me?

[BirdiewasHere]

@MellowMink

Theres a guy, He has whip skills, He jacket changes colors, There is a naked girl, and a bad guy, the end

[TheBrianJ]

@BirdiewasHere And then BIT COINS and the world explodes.

[Fishmon14]

@MellowMink

No. NO ONE can explain this shit.

[MightyKombat]

BTW Slowbeef you know Japanese to some extent right? I know a guy who could do with translating this game.

[scarecrow719]

So wait China is the Poison forest from Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind?

[MellowMink]

I was hoping 13:15 would be a crossover between Earnest Evans and Last Alert.

[TheVenhammer]

It's funny, because I can totally imagine the characters saying the dialogue that Slowbeef and Diabetus are guessing.

[ChemicalGodsend]

according to wikipedia this has a sequel starring the green haired girl...

[Dwarmin]

This is seeming more and more like an episode of LOST.

[nitendubsinc]

castlevania it is not

[durablefighter]

Thank you seananners!

[EpicFailShark]

Seananners did not like this video.

-30,000 views.

The power of bannanas.

[bahji9]

Now, I'm aware the air in China isn't very good, but as far as I know it hasn't yet devolved into Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind.

[zevex747]

@bahji9 - yeah I thought it looked like Nausicaa too! This game's setting is... strange.

[pockypurse]

Oh man, if Guy Kazama ever met Earnest Evans, they'd be the best crime-fighting, martial arts tournament-winning, gun-toting, artifact-finding, QWOPing one man armies ever.

[rule34win]

This sounds like the guy that used to do podcasts on 10tonhammer

[TheVenhammer]

The girl wasn't trying to run him over, or hit a wall, she's just a really reeeaaalllyyy bad driver.

[DarkcreationBox]

Earnest Evans plot!

[DarkcreationBox]

@DarkcreationBox In the 1930s, a man known as Earnest Evans learned about three ancient idols which held enough power to destroy the Earth. Evans decided to search the world to find the scattered idols, but he was injured before he could find all three. Now, many years later, his grandson, Earnest Evans III, continues his grandfather's quest to save humanity from total annihilation.

[Itadatimasu]

random nude greenhaired teenager randomly wear random clothes indeed...

[ShoopDoopDaWoop]

his nose wouldnt be bleeding, that would be crazy! it would obviously be exploding

[bdpss]

i cant fucking stop laughing

[Blobstor]

lol @ bitcoin reference :D

[10zazzy]

home im not interrupting anything but are you willing to accept jesus?

[Theismisacrime]

"Eww how young was that girl?" XD

[thevoiceofdogSA]

STILL CLIMBIN'

[BlueEmeraldX]

This is what Castlevania would look like if it were a CD-i game.

[Stairmaster9068]

maybe the road was an elevated motorway?

[JDWtri]

So THIS is Meet N' Fuck Kingdom..... seems about right.

[gameboycolor47]

lol i love how their figureing out the story then get distrated by the guys weilding pipes or helicopter parts or somthing xD

[EdmacZ]

I think we've finally nailed why this game isn't very good.

Why doesn't that aqua-haired girl have breast cancer? Imagine the drama as green-haired anime chick presses on her bitcoin adventure with Earnest Evans despite her illness. It's about time the video game world got a shock for a change.

[pyrix]

@EdmacZ Because otaku wouldn't like her as much because she isn't a pristine being of beauty. They freak out and cut up all of their memorabilia if they so much as hear that the character might be involved with a guy.

[umk23]

@EdmacZ I agree, it needs fleshing out, no pun intended.

[SotarV2]

If there is a bad bitcoin joke, I haven't heard it.

[slashbane]

That's so cute, they think we actually give a crap about the storyline.

[85879]

lol one of the tags is centrifuge

[Ygdrasel]

They were fighting Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

[FisiVisi]

Man do I miss Guy Kazama right now.

[rjakobi]

That's actually not a french maid outfit. It looks more Pocahontas-ish. With fringe.

[Nomad9]

10:42

Oh god, now all I can think of is Ridley going 'I TOLD YOU BRO, I TOLD YOU ABOUT STAYEHS!!"

[HatredEternal]

@Nomad9 IM STILL FALLIN'

[PickpocketSan]

By the way, that isn't the real bit coin. I've planted time bombs on this cruise ship to weed out the real one.

[PickpocketSan]

Seeing that girl jump up and down in that maid outfit was disturbingly adorable. I bet Otacon sets that GIF as his forum avatar.

[ValisHD]

@PickpocketSan i know right?

[DukeOnkled]

Green-haired naked chick seems a little too young to play this role.

[tehcoolcan]

2:00

Watch, as you realize the plane was actually a TRANSFORMER.

[Krbyfan1]

A guy wearing a veil with a bird on his head.

>Bird on his head

It's a Gender Confused Arabian Tim Buckley

[TheSzlaszdot]

"I GOT IT! They kidnapped the girl when they knocked out Earnest and brought her to this jail sss... wait."

Perfect comedic timing!

[Anthony3PO]

Earnest looks like the douchy blonde guy from captain planet.

[leviathan1173]

It's really disappointing that those Guiles didn't use any Sonic Booms, it would've been the highlight of the game.

[atomofish]

Why are the cutscenes so good yet the gameplay is SO bad?

[T00stoopid]

fuckin subbed

[PAMuffinMan]

Wait.

They went WEST from South America to get to EUROPE?

[PhoenixRage07]

@PAMuffinMan The Atlantic Ocean is a very scary place.

[SuperSmuffer]

@PAMuffinMan They went all the way around the world :)

[Deathforce013]

@PAMuffinMan It's correct. West is right.

[BagOfMagicFood]

@PAMuffinMan Maybe it's like, "Our map puts the Americas on the right, and we don't know how to make it wrap around!"

[paleknight1]

I'm surprised this didn't get a sequal earnest evans in SPACE!

[kidrobots]

what the shit? mongolia is below the petrified forest from nausicaa? and you're fighting the ohmu? get out of here game.

[CommanderMantis]

I'm in a catch 22. I Can't buy anime maid outfits without bitcoins, but bitcoins can only be picked up by someone dressed like an anime maid.

[SamuraiFoochs]

Kyoto Jones and the Temple of Anime.

[heroshadow42]

Actually, if you remember Illusion of Gaia, the Great Wall of China has a giant Fangar Worm. So the worms are legit.

[harizotoh7]

This game has such a fascinating premise: Indianna Jones meets Castlevania with Rondo of Blood style cutscenes. Such potential! Completely wasted.

[Goodguy33]

2:00 The funniest thing to me here is the complete absence of Hawaii.

[JDO3L]

Earnest Evan's is far from a One-Man Army.

[SuppliesAttack]

Apparently the developers of this game, Wolf Team, later joined up with Namco and made the Tales series (Tales of Vesperia, Tales of Symphonia, etc.)

Of course, none of these games are even close to a classic as Earnest Evans is.

[pullahoko]

"Knowwhutimean, Vern-San?"

[shadow12924]

so am i the only one that doesnt know what a "bit-coin" is?

[Shadow78954]

@shadow12924 its a form of money that's used on the internet.

[b74k3]

@shadow12924 actually, I don't know what a "bit-coin" is either

[SuperRandall]

@shadow12924 No, but you are the only one who resorted to asking in a youtube comment for information that could have been found in a 10 second google search.

[Skelengar]

I wonder if this would make any sense if I had any idea what they were saying.

[DaRkLoRdZoRc]

The European level is too far to the southwest to be Germany, Slowbeef. It looks like Luxembourg, or maybe it's supposed to be Paris. I have no clue. And the 'China' level is Bhutan or Tibet. This map is all fucked up. Maybe it's a side effect of the Great Sacred Sweet Tart.

Also, this game has awesome A.I.. Seriously, 4:40? I haven't seen a game with such strategic artificial intelligence since Contra Force.

[PhoenixRage07]

@DaRkLoRdZoRc It looked about France to me, but Luxembourg would be pretty cool, too.

[matty18972]

The world's slowest airplane returns!

[SpotxSpot]

Can't wait to see Ernest Evans trodding through San Luis Potosí.

[sygnus5]

To be fair, the game engine is pretty flippin' advanced for a Sega CD game. Of course, when they tried to make a game using it...

[pHr33kAcHu]

Hey I've already watched the whole thing, and even though I should probably save this for 4/4 (where the relevant commentary is) I just figured I'd mention before I forget. Wolfteam was later rebranded as tri-Ace and now makes the Tales RPG series for Namco. Mad House is the animation studio who made Cowboy Bebop, Paprika and Metropolis.

[Magitek1112]

It's funny, because the "anime villian" shows up again in El Viento and..pretty much just tells Annet what the bad guy is planning.

[TheDonaldPierce]

What the fuck is this shit?

Unsubbing.

[Magitek1112]

@TheDonaldPierce What, are you allergic to anime cutscenes? It's a longplay commentary.

[qwertyuiop78945612]

@TheDonaldPierce cool they don't give a fuck

[CaptinTrips]

*checks hair* Crap I'm an anime villain...

[CastlePokemetroid]

@CaptinTrips What's your generic plot to generically plan out a generic procedure to generically take over the world, or something generically generic like that?

[MellowMink]

You guys need to comment over longplays more often. These are awesome.

[Trollfagget]

1 person played this game and didn't think it was stupid.

[MiyoKiyo]

I like how it seems they just forgot to keep voice recording after the first two levels.

[Myth1322]

Wait the location Earnest is in at 9:40 isnt that the petrified Forrest underneath the toxic Jungle in the movie "Nausicaa valley of the wind"?!? Please tell me some knows what im talking about.

[theowmyfoothurtsvlog]

This game is actually the history of the mormon religion. :3

[ShiroToshi]

Oh it is efficient. Earnest is a Transformer. Why else would he go from plane to boat to plane again?

[MitchZer0II]

I once played Earnest Evans, but I kept on tripping in the first level.

[smpletan]

@MitchZer0II The secret final boss of Earnest Evans is the hurdle.

[marioVSshadow]

French Maid outfit? Inb4 saucy ending.

[CufinFan]

Oh Yeah we Germans really have Trains like this and all the of the other things :D

[puddinpoo]

She's got weird boobs, and a French maid outfit. Of course she's important and a love interest.

[Iwuznothere]

So Earnest Evans parked his plane in a moving train car to hit on some lady with a book then immediately ran back to it to fly to somewhere in europe?

[bloodriotiori]

@Iwuznothere ya....and....you have a problem with that? :)

[ncala]

At around 00:43 the blue haired man mentions the Necronomicon, you know...just in case shit wasn't confusing enough as it is.

[IzaakDay]

I nearly spat my drink all over my screen at Jehovah's witness the first time i watched this

[1andonlyWojjan]

What is this South American lady doing speaking Japanese?

[troysson81]

@1andonlyWojjan:

Translation convention.

[joesmomisdead]

Why does Earnest look like Joey from Yu-gi-Oh?

[Evan121991]

I can't stop laughing at this even though I've seen the whole thing several times. It's like this with every fucking Longplay you guys riff on for about a month or two. Basically just do these as often as you can and the world will be cured of depression.

[grrr9]

How can you spend so much effort on sprites and end up animating them like that?

[ZippAgain]

3:20

Pranquilizer is my new favorite portmanteau.

[CrystalisKnight]

Wait is 09:30 Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind under the toxic forest? this is so a rip off.

[TheFatty2497]

@CrystalisKnight EXACTLY WHAT I WAS THINKING! They even have like the same kind of bugs and quick sand.

[TwinDaggerOokazi]

I wonder this game would be like if it was dubed. I picture the guy from arrival in hell doing earnest evans voice.

[lobsopdoy]

@TwinDaggerOokazi ME GROTTY PISS-STAINED BITCOIN!

[MaverickhunterXZero]

I'm surprised Earnest Evans and Last Alert havn't been picked up by hollywood, these smash hits would be blockbusters

[MrWeirdGuy]

10:32 I think you mean the Stairway to Evans.

[DarkOmegaMK2]

Ernest Evans, how dare you kill these precious monsters i trained?!

[CyberSlayer128]

I know this is an epic "Derp" comment for me but maybe the story would make some kind of sense if there was English subtitle's. Granted if its a japan exclusive game then that makes sense but still.....but a coal monster???

[CastlePokemetroid]

@CyberSlayer128 A coal monster that breathes fire on piles of inflammable coal.

[DarkOmegaMK2]

so.. what exactly is Ernest? is he a super saiyan archeologist on crack? or just some random guy with a whip? a Belmont wanna be? Guy Kasama's lost cousin?

[AbsoluteVirtue18]

Oh, and apparently there are two sequels.

[AbsoluteVirtue18]

Evans must find the treasures before Tressider does. In the middle of his journey, Evans stumbles upon a beautiful young girl lying in some ruins in Peru by the name of Annet Myer, who accompanies him for the rest of his adventures. The two encounter a mysterious figure by the name of Sigfried, who has unknown motives, but seems to know a lot about Hastur and his cult.

...I'm still confused.

[Evan121991]

@AbsoluteVirtue18 I THINK, the Sigfried guy is the slightly-gray-but-actually-blu­e haired anime villain who's on the raft with him later...and Tressider just looks exactly the same, except he's the guy looking at him on the bridge who steals the book and is the Disco Wizard and maybe the final boss?

It's the only explanation I can come to, that there's two characters who look and speak exactly the same but are actually different people.

[AbsoluteVirtue18]

Here's the story:

In the 1930s, a man known as Earnest Evans learned about three ancient idols which held enough power to destroy the Earth. Evans decided to search the world to find the scattered idols, but he was injured before he could find all three. Now, many years later, his grandson, Earnest Evans III, continues his grandfather's quest to save humanity from total annihilation. However a rival treasure hunter named Brady Tresidder also seeks the idols to bring the world's destruction.

[xValis77x]

@AbsoluteVirtue18 wiki ftw

[Urmean15]

Why does Anette's or whatever her name is skin keep changing?

[ColonelVile]

Holy shit, I was trippin hard and not even took my meds yet, but this would have been a walk in the park for Guy Kazama

[AbsoluteVirtue18]

That book belongs in a museum!

[Quadraxis14]

China turned into that forest from Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind where they spent a half hour doing nearly jack shit in... At least Earnest Evans takes it to the giant insects with his masterful whip-flailing technique.

[CriminalstMastermind]

Wait, was the thing on the stairs voiced by Ridley?

[KAOSHazmatt]

The only way this game could be better is if it was run off a SNES9X emulator.

[gf202020]

...so...just why the hell was the naked girl there anyways? A Sacrifice that Evans foiled? A girl who was always living in the ruins? The plot as silly as it was, was somewhat easy to try and make sense. Evans wants idols from nightmareish places and evil bishouen try to use them to unleash hell.

...but then this girl appears and seems to be the 'Chosen one to stop the evil' or some shit that makes Evans looks not needed, like she's the real main character, even though she doesn't do shit.

[Crystalgate]

@gf202020 The girl is actually the main character of two other games game named El Viento and whatever. She does stuff there. Still, she doesn't do shit in Earnest Evans for sure.

[EinDose]

@Crystalgate Wait, this is a TRILOGY?

[Crystalgate]

@EinDose Indeed. Here's a rough summary:

Earnest Evans: Something threatens the world and Earnest stops it.

El Viento: Something threatens the world and Annet (green haired girl) stops it.

Annet-something: Something threatens the world and Annet stops it.

El Viento is actually a decent game and worth a try. The other two can be skipped.

[EponymousKid]

3:02 Look at Earnest's lips. Even his mouth moves in a creepy, unnatural fashion.

[TheToast7]

9:34 Ok, so Wolf Team thinks that China is those caves from Nausicaa: Valley of the Wind?

[Evan121991]

@TheToast7 No, no, they think MONGOLIA is those caves from Nausicaa.

[TheFatty2497]

@TheToast7 Nausicaa Rip Off

[gaminggoddess85]

Amazingly, this game is part of a series.

[TheRadicalOneNG]

The best parts where the ones where Slowbeef was just confused by what we were fighting. 

[Battfro]

Wow, I just deiced to look up Wolf Team and it turns out that it's the old name of Namco Tales Studio (it was renamed in 2003) and, as the name may imply, are the developers of the Tales RPG series. Also, the game is set in the 30s and the reason he moves like shit is because the game developers thought they could make more fluid animation if they animated each body part separately and ended up fucking it up.

[TheToast7]

@Battfro I'm glad they learned from their experience to make the Tales games be nothing like this at all.

[jsh020]

@Battfro i know i shit bricks when i read that

[8Rezon]

I've always thought Earnest Evans was like those Mario ROM hacks that has spike traps and fire everywhere, but it's just like really bad at it

[KingKiddoh]

That's actually the fastest airplane.

[PuppetMasterIX]

Raiders of the Lost Bitcoin