Added: 4 years ago
From: iliekmudkipz69
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  • LMAO!! Hahahaha! Clusters? Oh fuck, I laughed so hard! The Xenu character looks like the bad guy from Flash Gordon!! WTF? Seriously people? Well, I'm gonna go release some clusters in the bathroom! ROTFL!! Oh damn....

  • lmao...Tom Cruise is a fucking... idiot!!!

  • Scientology is just the Mormonism of the 21st century. Like Scientology, Mormonism gives you a planet to be God over when you die and was founded by a charlatan. Scientology's brutality right now is due to its psychopath leader. After he goes away, a new group should take over that twists the bad things L. Ron Hubbard said into good things. What's left should be a caring group of people, not unlike Mormons today.

  • 0:54 goof the floof?

  • Comment removed

  • The jesus story is just stupid

    at least the xenu story has a cool sci fi twist

    not just post say magic tricks

  • @iliekmudkipz69 agreed, but im atheist because of the fact they are all just stupid >.<

  • @shadow11479

    I go on my kind of faith just like you and everyone else on this page. I cant prove solid that god exist but I have my faith just like you cant prove we all evolved from monkeys. Nobody has seen it in progress and therefore not making it science law. In order for something to be declared science law it has to be tested and. Evolution does not fall uinder any of these and when a science teacher teaches this they cease to become a scientist and become a preacher.

  • @iliekmudkipz69

    explain to me what is soooo stupid about a man growing up to save his people. Then his people betraying him and then nailing him to a cross. Your ignorant-prove to me this didnt happen and I will believe you

  • @siegfried0752 "prove to me this didnt happen and I will believe you"

    Truly the staple of religious believes right here.

  • @siegfried0752 prove to me it did.

  • @Cabot2jville2010- Are u willing to bet ur soul on that!!?? I do! Lets hope not for ur sake! ;-)

  • LMAO wow this is a worse than star trek on lsd! Wtf is wrong with these people! Find jesus u guys will guys will ne just fine!

  • @myownruin187 the jesus story is just as silly ;)

  • Xenu looks like a pornstar.

  • Well he was a Sci-Fi writer before he 'invented' the fake religion Scientology. He was heard telling people that religion, not writing, was where the money was......The story is corny as hell yet people pay for this crap! If it fails..pay another $5k...and then if it fails you are stupid and kicked out so they say they got it! Good, 10k and to the next level!....Very expensive real life game.

  • HAHAHAHHAHAHAH XD

    thats so freaking awesom, what a bunch of shit... i can only laugh about this. what stupid humans life on the earth 0o

  • ok hold up...how in the fuck do u un-elect someone and what does "Goof the floof" mean!?!?!

  • I actually just met xenu, he's a pretty cool guy. Bought me a beer. :)

  • NAWWHHH xenu escaped, we played some chess the other day...damn hes good :/

  • We are watching o_O you

  • Hubbard should have written "Starting a Religion for Dummies"

  • oh my god I cant believe how fuckin stupid these people are!!!!!!!!!!!

  • so 5k a pop until you get super power is a good deal...... not

  • So are Thetans what collect in the Belly button, arse crack and what create those little knot balls on the undercarriage of cheap nylon underpants then?

  • @soupage23 Yes. They're also a delicious salad topping.

  • LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO­OOOOOL

  • i wanna make a religion TOOOOO!!! :D

  • if you cant achieve psychic abilities...then you must take the course again for another 5000 pounds

    wow money making woooo

  • xena looks a lot like travolta

  • I can't believe that people believe this!

  • all scientologist are morons if they believe in this crap thumbs up if you agree

  • "10 volcanoes or more"? - only 10 for the entire population? Or More? "A revolt followed at The Loyal Officers against Xenu" - What makes them so loyal?

  • H bombs? What about F bombs?

  • isn't that prison the same as the guys in superman THE GAME

  • I like how they deny the Xenu story yet put volcanoes all over their Dianetics books and pamphlets...

  • Religion is made for freedom! For example christianity assures you a lot!! Would you rather go to heaven? Get invaded by xenu? Just die and nothing else happens?? Isnt better to believe in something that assures you?? Who cares if jesus existed?? He may have or not but Believing in him will make you feel better about life!!

  • @adriprotux I don't need a fairytail story to settle my nerves for the rest of my life. I'm not looking forward to dying but I´m also not affraid of it. There are enough things in my life that make my life worth living. Matter a fact, not believing in anything but the ground under my feet is the greatest thing there is. Whole countries die over religions.

  • @adriprotux

    Some people would rather look for logic and truth than whatever makes them feel warm and fuzzy inside.

  • Hydrogen bombs where dropped on volcanoes that didnt exist 20 billion years ago.

    If you don't agree then you are a mud person covered in homo thetans and will die of cancer.

    Unless you have $250,000 and then you will be alright like Heath Ledger and Isaac Hayes who are really looking good now !!

  • marijuanaology ftw! lmao

  • i can have out of body experiences...just get me some acid lol

  • we shud get scientology to piss off christianity, then the crazy christians who love to protest and whine about everything can bring a holy smackdown on the COS. Then we blame both groups for inciting hatred and athiests are looked upon wit respect. lol

  • I guess it shows ... the weakness of human nature. If we're STILL able to believe in such crazy stories. The way we are now is not much different from the way we were thousands of years ago.  Chrisitans should not laugh at this story because stories in the Bible are JUST as ridiculous .. or even more so than this story.

  • They just want a cult and your money

  • "xenu" just another one of satans names

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  • You gotta be fucking kidding me...

  • And then the aliëns brought in their planet sized gun: the death star.... Xenu asked help from darth vader, who was bussy battling the God-Emperor. Pink bunny's came up and shot lazers and this war still continues to this very day, the day you still don't have psychic powers but have lost 10.000 pounds!

  • rofl "if u dont have psychic powers or out of body experiences then u have to pay £5000 to take the course again."

  • star wars

  • I agree that the bible has "crazier" stuff than this but at least when the bible came out, it was during a time when you "could" believe some of the stuff. This crap was written in an age where you know where the inspirations where taken from. And it reeks of an amateur writer. That's L.Ron Hubbard.

  • Makes perfect sense to me with one exeption, ZEMU got a bad wrap in all that mess. He was really looking out for everyone's best interests. He had no intention of starting a revolt or seeing anyone get hurt. He really wanted everyone to get prepared for the next evolutionary leap. Ron just wanted the same thing for us all but was ridiculed for it. Where do I send the 5 grand? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!!! You have to really be lost to go for this fairy tale. Blind leading the blind.

  • 5,000 pounds is about $11,000.00, USD. This is obviously an older movie. Wish I'd seen it before I wasted $30 (and way too much time) on an intro Scilon comm ("con") course. Damn, I'm dumb!

  • @ChurchOfKali66619 duuuuuuuuuude if you spent any money on this cult, that was a dumb move, but realizing that it was dumb suggests that youre smarter than all the ppl that were sucked into that cult, so congrats on that!

  • It's amazing how people believe in the most outlandish bullshit every contrived. But the Bible has crazier stories than this.

  • Ever heard of the Spaghetti monster? Look in wikipedia..

  • I'm guessing you mean the Flying Spaghetti Monster? Yes I've heard of him. Why do you ask?

  • Because it sounds stranger then this :D

  • Oh no! Ima get pneumonia and die for not paying money to hear this! lolwut? These idiots are on some really wacky stuff. Maybe they finally mixed LSD with some other shit into the ultimate tripping drug! That is the only explanation for people believing something so stupid! They are on an eternal acid trip!

  • wait a sec,

    if you need the power of telekinesis to move to the next OT level then how does anyone ever move to the next level ?

    I'm sorry, anybody can try with all the effort in the world but telekinesis simply does not exist in the real world.

  • And THAT'S how scientologists milk you.

  • If you can't sell your books as sci-fi, sell them as religion. Doesn't change how much LRH's writing sucks though.

  • Stop being an S.P. Nice to 'run into you' in cyberspace. Oh Shit, it's Xenu! I think he's with Wotan, nope, It's Yahweh, no it's Thor, or is it Mithras. Fucking deities, they all look alike...

  • Aww shit! I've been caught!

  • I know, as you do, that you're a Scientolgist! You are a spy, trying to get everyone off of topic. It's a Scientologist ploy. Are OT 100,000,000,000,000,000 yet? I'm OT 100,000,000,000,000,000,000,00­0,000,000. I can fly now. Which is good, since the 'Church' took all my money...

  • Hahahaha, well I do need a Scientology book to add to my collection. Fuck, I'm still only a third of the way through my stupid Bible. I've got two more crazy religious books after that. And then, to Scientology!

  • Why would you waste your time reading Dianetics? But then again, I'm a 'Psych'. SO I'm worse than the Devil.

  • Why would I waste time reading any religious material? Actually, I'm enjoying all the animal sacrifice in the old testament hahaha.

  • You said that you were reading religious material. NOW you say you aren't. You're making me dizzy. About the animal sacrifice, well, might want to ponder that one, P.N.!!!!!!!!!!!! " We're go-ing to have, some pig roast-ing on, the Fire..." I wrote that just for you. Consder it a love song. I do love PIg. However, not the insane kind...

  • Nooooo, you fool. I was asking one of those questions that isn't really a question! Like when people say "is the Pope a Catholic" which really means "yes" even though there are other Popes... Hey, so my Scientological past life was a pig-lizard... Like on GALAXY QUEST!!!! Never give up! Never surrender!!!!! Now THAT is some fun sci-fi. I'd join a Galaxy Quest religion before I joined Scientology.

  • Well, I think that Scientology is right up your alley. It's insane, like you. As for their being other popes, well, there WERE other Popes. When one dies, another takes their place. Kind of like Crack dealers. Also, you weren't a Pig-lizard in a past life, you were probably something akin to a worm, or possibly a Cock Roach, or hair lice. You know, something not all that special. Wait, I know! Silly me, you must have been either a fly, or a Pig, since both enjoy Shit...

  • A flying pig! Yay!

    I mean there's a Coptic Pope or something.

  • So, you do enjoy shit. What is a Coptic Pope?

  • The Coptic Christians are based in Egypt I think, and they have their own Pope.

  • It's hard to watch my video with the intermittent 'beeps'. Anyway, I thought that the Pope was a Catholic figure? You're filled with esoteric knowledge. An encyclopedia of gibberish you are. You must kick ass in trivial pursuit?

  • I suck at trivial pursuit. Or I assume I do. I haven't played in ages... Assuming I have played at all... And this is a weird place to have a conversation, wait till some random reads it.

  • Yes, it is a weird place to have a conversation. However, isn't that what you Scientologists do? Your job is to derail negative comments about your religion. And your doing a mighty fine job to! You're not a S.G. Your a S.P. detractor! To any 'randoms' reading this, well, sorry, it's an inside joke between R.B. and S.G. That too, is an inside joke.

  • You must be a Scientologist too, you're always coming up with an abbr. for everything. Why can't I be a PTS!? I wanna be a PTS! SP is boring... Unless you're talking about GBA SP. I used to love mine. Then Nintendo fucked it up with DS. I suppose DS is pretty cool, but I feel like they started putting too much effort into the technology and not enough into the game itself... in some weird way... or maybe I just grew out of it.

  • I'm not a scientologist (or am I?). A PTS is only a 'mild' SP. You have to be a complete dissenter to be labelled an SP (like ToryMagoo44), she's a cool lady. Perhaps you could trade your 'freak mask' for a 'Anonymous mask'? Video games are cool, however, I don't own the new Play station. I have the older one. I loved Grand theft Auto. There was so much in that game, as far as the virtual city and such. And the killing, OH THE KILLING!!!

  • Well surely I'm a PTS, because while I think it's all stupid, I do find amusement in watching all its activities... Scientology gives the world one more thing to laugh at.

  • Yes, Scientology can be amusing. However, like all bullshit belief systems it makes people ignorant, not to mention, stupid. That's a bad thing when it leads to nonsensical behaviour. Something you know quite a lot about. However, you're more of a S.G., than a PTS. However, it beats PTSD or in your case, PMS.

  • No no, religion does nothing but organise idiots. Unless we bring in strict breeding guidelines, the morons will continue to pass on their lame genes, and humanity will just get dumber. I don't have enough faith in humans to say that their beliefs are what make them stupid, ignorant fools. They're just like that naturally.

  • You're cutting into my 'Rush DVD time' (I'm taking summer courses at University, this is my day off!! Prick!). However, I take issue with the comment that 'all religious people are morons'. Many are, however, many 'compartmentalize' their faith. I feel it's a kind of 'Rationalization'. People are like computers, in that if they take in bogus ideas (software), it tends to effect the workings of the brains (hardware). You're so full of yourself!!

  • No, I said, religion organises idiots. I didn't say "all religious people are morons". I do see how their crappy ideas can fuck up their brains though.

  • Yes, religion can screw up people's brain. No doubt about it.

  • I meant, " I know, as you do, that you're a Scientolgist". Also, I meant, "Are you an OT 100...". For some reason, the higher up the OT scale you go, the less well your brain works. Just ask Tom Cruise.

  • HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA XD That isn't worth a buck!

  • Are you serious? This is a comic story. I Can understand the Soul's and the good of everyone being more important then worshiping God but this just sounds like somebody watched too many sci fi movies, Super Psycic Powers, I don't Think that's technically possible with our brains seen as our brains are only capable of releasing mental energy and not able to actually release invisible physical energy to everyone else.

    The Matrix of life sort of explains this and that everything we see is a code.

  • Scientology is BULLFUCKINGSHIT!!! This shit is nonsense!

  • i'm gonna make my own religion and hire some hypnotists to get my fucked up idea into gullable people's head and then make millions of dollars... what a good idea.

  • good luck writing a sci-fi novel

  • AHAHAHA.

    If you can't lift a cup with your mind, you gotta pay another 5k to read the whole damn stupid book again.

  • 'Gain psychic powers'? Yeah, RIGHT.

    They just want to brainwash you and steal your money.

    Fuck Scientology.

  • If anyone believes this bullshit they need to get some serious psychiatric help. Stupid ass Scientology robots. When will they ever learn that Mickey Mouse and Peter Pan run the show?

  • they wont find out, they are as dumb as Pluto.

    Most of them will never hear about Xenu because they cant afford to get at the OTIII level it takes above a quarter of a million dollars.

  • WOW! I still blows me away that people pay that amount of money for bullshit fairytales. Thank god for Anonymous. Those are some fine folks who are doing a great job exposing the truth.

  • i need to start my own religion damn it, they are making lots of dough out of a bunch of suckers.

  • Batshit crazy stuff.. I can't believe there are people out there believing in this load of crap..

  • lolz

  • dude crackheads can't even dream this shizzle up omg nutjobs

  • if you really think about it this isnt that much different than normal religious stories. kind of scary huh

  • uh, the cake isn't a lie, you can actually get it eventually. a better example is attacking the Death Star II, because we all know, IT'S A TRAP!

  • ...please someone tell me this is just a videos to get a cheap laugh... are you serious? is this really what the scientology is?... i am ashamed to call myself a human -_-

  • Cont.

    So they didn't give me a refund even though I got there the day the second course started and apparently there was a deadline that passed to get my refund. This lost me every penny of that $1,000 I paid to get common sense and fairy tale bullshit shoved down my throat. The first course was $500, which isn't enough because they don't teach it all even after $1,000 and the 2nd course. There's a third more expensive one! OH and they deprive you of sleep and food during these 3 day courses.

  • Im really sick and tired of everyone talking bad about Xenu......Xenu donated thousands to my local church,coordinated a food drive for the homeless and even saved my Aunties cat (Muffins) when he got stuck in a tree....LEAVE XENU ALONE!!

  • great way to make some good money... fool idiots who really belives in this star trek bullshit

  • Scientologist can suck my huge hairy nutsack, FOR FREE!, not 5000pounds

  • And I used to think that trekkies we're weird!

  • most chrisitan bible stories make about the same amount of sense. at least this one has h bombs and cool spaceships. haha

  • I completely agree.

    And AlbertaAllan,

    Yes! Idiots who can't think for themselves feel "empowered" because finally they've found "it" and know what they've been missing all along.

    I took Landmark Education which essentially says you can't live a happy life because you don't know how. So my employer paid for the first course, I felt extremely uplifted and empowered but it quickly faded. I had signed up for the second course which I paid out of pocket $1,000 and didn't attend because it's bullshit.

  • true the bible has lot's of stories that make no sense but at least nobody's has pay anyone to hear them, or study them or attend church, I gone to church the when they pass the bowl in which i'm suppose put money as donation, I don't i just pass it to next sucker.

  • They promise you psychic powers and you don't get them. So you take the course again. There's a sucker born every minute!

  • I just got pneumonia from this.

  • .......I think....my brain...just..stopped. I cannot form words to accurately describe what i have to say in regards to this video. ._.

  • that's pneumonia sir. you were warned ˇˇ

  • LOL

  • Scientology=ignorant fools

  • I tell you what the story is bullshit as the religion and its followers and Author were but the artwork is cool in this video very 70's John Buscema like (great marvel comic artist rip john we miss you!)

  • well tickle my balls....where do i sign...?

  • now that was funny!!!!

  • there having a special offer, 2 courses for the price of 7 10000000000 pounds plz, kthxbai

  • i love science ficton! it's so intersting...what?...people actualy believe this? wow! what a bunch of knobs!

  • Ok, people actually believe this what is the world coming too!!!! (sigh)

  • i think i just died inside

  • No, that was just your thetans being destroyed. Congrats!

  • You have got to be kidding me. If you cannot move things with your mind you have to take the course again for 5000 pounds? What the fuck? Shouldn't it be, if you cannot do it, you get your money back?

    If you have to pay then a money back guarentee is in order.

  • Flippineck!

  • Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha­hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha­hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha­hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha­hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha­hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha­hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha­hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha­hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha­hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha­hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha­hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha­hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha­hahahahaha... that is so fake and dumb Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha­hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha­hahahahaha

  • what a load of bullcrap :/

  • hahaha. scientologists, what a bunch of spunk bubbles.

  • was l ron hubbard trying to create a religion or make a scietific book which stupid retarded ppl beleive ??

  • ROFLMAO scientology is fkn retarded

  • what the hell?

  • Now I understand. Mr. L Ron Hubbard stories are obviously made up. I thought that he was some kind of a prophet but no.. he's just a troubled storyteller with wild imaginations. It's weird for me to think of why Scientology even exist.

  • scientolygy or how ever you spell it, is retarded, i mean how stupid could you be ?

    but...

    i would like to lift a spoon with my mind

  • whoa

  • :hey i cant be da l337 psyick lolollololo

    sicintolgy guy:hmmmmmmm lett me c. ... . oh yes ure a noob and must take the course agian

    :for free?

    :noo....

  • ROFL @ "You must take the course again..." Part XD

  • i know thats how they get there money. dumb shit isn't it lul

  • Perhaps this is mixed truth or fakes whatever it is its got peoples attention and I wonder how long it will last

  • What the hell kinda shit was Hubbard smoking O_o

    Well either way he's dead and his story the coaxed millions of people to convert to a cult through means of pcycological torture and bullcrap lives on

  • Can i borrow some cash so i can rid myself of these useless Thetons? I need about $4800.. anyone?

  • Lol, if ya gets 4800$ buy yourself a fast car and outrun the blighters, wayy moar funs!

    :D

  • ..you must take the course again, for another 5000 pounds LMFAOOO

  • HAHAHA LMFAO that was the funniest shit i've ever heard!!! I feel soo bad for people who fell for this

  • so now jesus is mor popular than his man-made god now, oh wow this gets even better everyday

  • lol...wow...thats a joke right?

  • What the...?

  • Tom cruise knows this he had the money to pay for the truth; its a shame that jesus will hold his arms open to all you people til you die; and still you people will die in your sins and with your man made fairy tales of other gods and rulers. May jesus have forgiveness on all your souls

  • troll fails

  • what the fuck? I can't understand how people actually believe in this shit... whats next? a religion praising the 2 girls 1 cup vid?

  • ahhh i loled.

  • suppose the £5000 price wont matter once you go on tour with your new telekenetic abilities.

    this course PAYS FOR ITSELF....wonder can i do a seperate tea cup course. bit broke after i bought those magic beans.

  • thats a new one; die of pneumonia if unprepared xD

    gay ass hubbard and his lower than shit doctrines...

  • 5000 pounds? how much is that in U.S dollars? it sounds like a lot!

  • 9 919.5 U.S. dollars is how much 5000 pounds is, which in my opinion is so ridiculous the so called church should pay you to learn this laughable B***S***, what a total waste of hard earned money lol

  • you got me fuckd up i would never pay that to learn some ridiculous nonsense, i could make up a better story. do think ppl wil give me $9919.50? idk about you but i wasnt created by a damn alien!! lol.

  • I wonder if LRH knew the Church would go on after his death.

  • Sounds kinda like a nerdy story like Star-trek.

  • What a fucking lame story, seriously if your going to have a cult might as well make it INTERESTING to where you either want to kill yourself or others!

  • but this shows that people are stupid enought to fallow it anyaway...

  • "The galatic *snort* federation!"

    And I thought WoW and DnD was Nerdy.

  • Im sold, how do i sign up for the church of fucktardology???

  • i think the saying is "a dumbass and his money are soon parted"

  • 5 grand for a cartoon hubbard was on some great weed no ?

  • By the time they 'learn' this they're already so submissive to the cult and it's beliefs that they could tell them anything and they'd believe it.

  • GOOF THE FLOOF!