Curious that I found this video just a year after you post it. What an amazing way to address such a complicated topic. Thanks for this video I’m sure you have helped many people, at least today you made my day. Thanks!
It's important to note that not all of us "grieve" being gay; I never had problems accepting myself; I did have to adapt to how the world wants me to act and behave but I was never sad I was gay just hurt by other people's intolerance, most notably my parents. I didn't care what they thought but it still hurt (i.e. anti gay seminar). They did get better over time though and I've learned what not to talk about. It never became something "up for discussion" in my Christian family much though.
@SillyGayBoy Great advice, thank you for adding. When I say I "grieved" I suppose I grieved that I couldn't be the person everyone expected me to be. I grieved that I couldn't live up to their expectations. Turns out all they wanted was for me to be happy! And I finally am. :-)
I say; if you have unaccepting parents especially religious or hate filled or homophobic ones; DON'T come out to them at all or at least prolong it until you move out if you can. My parents only found out since my mom read a letter I wrote and it made life unnecessarily difficult. If that hadn't happened; I never would have told them and the crap they put me through was enough proof I shouldn't have. Religious types trying to force kids to be straight doesn't help anything.
Never do the thing you did during the first few seconds before I get a nose bleed! xD no kidding do what you may! I love your channel and I wanna say, in behalf of all your veiwers, thank you so much for your help and support and really giving us closet cases hope for the future *well Im not COMPLETELY closeted per say* but yeh *nose bleeds* u are one cool guy :P
Wow buddy! Your video was filled with all kinds of raw emotion. Very somber, real and just the way it is. I loved your analogy of the robot. Because that's how I felt, doing what i was programmed to do and now that I've come out to my family--6 yrs ago after dealing with a lot of people on it, I feel like myself. I feel like I'm writing and performing my own program, not someone else's. Thanks for uploading this video man, you're really doing a great thing here!
@vidhead85 That's great to hear. I'm so glad you have become your own person instead of letting your environment control you. :-) Thank you so much for watching.
I have an issue with you saying "in the rare case your family disowns you" sadly that isn't rare. It hurts more than words can describe, it is pain that never goes away.
I really enjoy your videos, you are making a difference.
@aaronlosing I'm sorry to hear about your parents; I do believe that it is becoming less common here in the US. Not long ago it was "something you knew you weren't supposed to talk about" and now it's in every day conversation. Parents more and more know there's a possibility their kid is gay now and aren't blindsided when it happens. It depends on the age of parents and their values. My parents were older and Christian and gave me a hard time but I wasn't disowned but I nearly "divorced" them.
@SillyGayBoy From the volunteer work I have done it doesn't seem like gays are being accepted by their families more at least in the south. So many of the homeless youth are LGBT it makes me very sad that people who are brave enough to be themselves have to endure such pain. Growing up is confusing and painful enough without losing your family. With all the LGBT focus in recent years I do believe people are becoming more aware but not necessarily more accepting. I enjoy both of your channels.
@aaronlosing Which is the other channel of mine you like? You might mean my boyfriends channel that has me a lot in it but younger. Is it that one? Yes I've heard Southerners are really into not talking about feelings and being religious and ignorant unfortunately especially Texas with the ignorance, and Mississippi. Not all Midwest or Southern states are bad though I've heard good things about Utah Arkansas and Missouri so I guess Minnessotta is still coming around and older people are narrower
@aaronlosing What kind of volunteer work do you do? Yeah it is sad that they have do have that pain and people are so selfish sometimes just doing what's right for them and not caring who it affects. I know one guy that had a depressed dad that killed himself and family members burned all of his photos claiming that since he was gay that's why the dad killed himself (which wasn't true). Some people just need someone to blame or turn away from.
Thank you for sharing the point of not expecting the family to support you immediately. I have said that same thing to myself before but recently I have been struggling to remember it. It was good to hear it again from you.
Thank you for being a real and open and honest person. For sharing the parts of you that most people hide away. You are an inspiration!
@KindaGayBlog Okay i respect that :) I guess it's just because you started off this channel a bit more serious. But go ahead and be creepy weird and funny, that's how I live my life. XD
Great first tip. I was always concerned about the future and I missed out on a lot because of it :/
That was another good point about not expecting immediate support. It took about a month for my family to be comfortable with me again. My dad didn't talk to me for a little less than a week until he finally decided to talk about it with me and reassure me that I had his support.
I was so lucky to have my brothers support prior to telling my family. That really helped.
There is something so rare and authentic about your videos, watching your videos you can really fell and see the emotion you have towards the topics you talk about. You’re making an impact, keep up the good work.
You're pretty much right about everything, and I can SO relate to virtually everything you said O_o For me, there was no hostility, at worst indifference (which is annoying but it could be worse I guess). About parents going through the same process to accept : hopefully it won't take them as long as me !! Cause at the moment, I can't talk about me being gay, and it gives the feeling they're not ok. Disappointing silence =/
@GayGHvain87 I'm not comfortable talking about my personal life and who I'm seeing with my parents. I'm pretty private about things. I'm just now mentioning my boyfriend in conversations and we've been together a year!
@depfox Haha that's the bad thing about these long videos where I ramble! The information is very scattered! Thanks for watching Jay & Bryan! My partner is out to his mom and sister. He's pretty sure his dad would understand but he's never been that close to him.
WOW...I didnt know that you came out to them on Valentines...I agree with you a 100% I also tell young people who are in college or high school that if you think your parents will use money as a weapon...dont do it untill you are ready to stand on your two feet...I agree with you that family is what you make it. My core Family is Bryan-Selena-Daniel...So why did you choose "Answered" How about your partner is he out to his family? He seems very shy.
WOW...I didnt know that you came out to them on Valentines...I agree with you a 100% I also tell young people who are in college or high school that if you think your parents will use money as a weapon...dont do it untill you are ready to stand on your two feet...I agree with you that family is what you make it. My core Family is Bryan-Selena-Daniel...So why did you choose Valentines day to come out? How about your partner is he out to his family? He seems very shy.
To be honest I think you need to watch the British documentary about gay life in Uganda! Its ****ing horrible! I think you will like it. after watching this, you will not only feel good to have come out, but you will always never take for sexual oreintation for granted! Trust me, it is the sadest thing to seee for any gay person. You really love your country! Although America is real bad at other points
My grandpa has one friend, gay friend. He is over 60 now, but he is a great person. My parents know that he is gay, but they say, "Uhmm, that's not our business"
I still depend on them, it's my last year in school and I have to enter a university... Anyway, I don't know how they'll react, so I won't tell them about myself.
I agree when you say that you don't have to tell everyone. My elderly parents don't need to know. They are Catholic, and I think it would only cause them more stress then joy at this stage of their life.
..I was planning on coming out to my mum today. Unfortunately I didn't get the opportunity, but now I'm kind of glad because I was able to watch your video first. Thank you. :)
Great video Samuel! Fortunately I could come out to my family relatively easy and never experienced the struggle or agony of wondering if they would still love me. With my dad he did basically just "ok" and that was that. I was blessed to have such openminded, liberal and accepting parents. I only wish all people could have the unconditional love and support that I've had from friends/family.
@acornsrus That's really wonderful and amazing to hear! I'm so glad you never had to feel afraid of your own family and the ones who love you the most. It's a feeling that just eats you up inside until you realize it's never as bad as it seems.
Curious that I found this video just a year after you post it. What an amazing way to address such a complicated topic. Thanks for this video I’m sure you have helped many people, at least today you made my day. Thanks!
artpacsol 2 weeks ago
It's important to note that not all of us "grieve" being gay; I never had problems accepting myself; I did have to adapt to how the world wants me to act and behave but I was never sad I was gay just hurt by other people's intolerance, most notably my parents. I didn't care what they thought but it still hurt (i.e. anti gay seminar). They did get better over time though and I've learned what not to talk about. It never became something "up for discussion" in my Christian family much though.
SillyGayBoy 1 year ago
@SillyGayBoy Great advice, thank you for adding. When I say I "grieved" I suppose I grieved that I couldn't be the person everyone expected me to be. I grieved that I couldn't live up to their expectations. Turns out all they wanted was for me to be happy! And I finally am. :-)
KindaGayBlog 1 year ago
I say; if you have unaccepting parents especially religious or hate filled or homophobic ones; DON'T come out to them at all or at least prolong it until you move out if you can. My parents only found out since my mom read a letter I wrote and it made life unnecessarily difficult. If that hadn't happened; I never would have told them and the crap they put me through was enough proof I shouldn't have. Religious types trying to force kids to be straight doesn't help anything.
SillyGayBoy 1 year ago
Never do the thing you did during the first few seconds before I get a nose bleed! xD no kidding do what you may! I love your channel and I wanna say, in behalf of all your veiwers, thank you so much for your help and support and really giving us closet cases hope for the future *well Im not COMPLETELY closeted per say* but yeh *nose bleeds* u are one cool guy :P
sadguyfoundout1 1 year ago
Wow buddy! Your video was filled with all kinds of raw emotion. Very somber, real and just the way it is. I loved your analogy of the robot. Because that's how I felt, doing what i was programmed to do and now that I've come out to my family--6 yrs ago after dealing with a lot of people on it, I feel like myself. I feel like I'm writing and performing my own program, not someone else's. Thanks for uploading this video man, you're really doing a great thing here!
vidhead85 1 year ago
@vidhead85 That's great to hear. I'm so glad you have become your own person instead of letting your environment control you. :-) Thank you so much for watching.
KindaGayBlog 1 year ago
thanx for the advise (:
SnoremonsterTV 1 year ago
I have an issue with you saying "in the rare case your family disowns you" sadly that isn't rare. It hurts more than words can describe, it is pain that never goes away.
I really enjoy your videos, you are making a difference.
aaronlosing 1 year ago
@aaronlosing I'm really sorry you have to endure that pain, Aaron. Thank you for watching.
KindaGayBlog 1 year ago
@aaronlosing I'm sorry to hear about your parents; I do believe that it is becoming less common here in the US. Not long ago it was "something you knew you weren't supposed to talk about" and now it's in every day conversation. Parents more and more know there's a possibility their kid is gay now and aren't blindsided when it happens. It depends on the age of parents and their values. My parents were older and Christian and gave me a hard time but I wasn't disowned but I nearly "divorced" them.
SillyGayBoy 1 year ago
@SillyGayBoy From the volunteer work I have done it doesn't seem like gays are being accepted by their families more at least in the south. So many of the homeless youth are LGBT it makes me very sad that people who are brave enough to be themselves have to endure such pain. Growing up is confusing and painful enough without losing your family. With all the LGBT focus in recent years I do believe people are becoming more aware but not necessarily more accepting. I enjoy both of your channels.
aaronlosing 1 year ago
@aaronlosing Which is the other channel of mine you like? You might mean my boyfriends channel that has me a lot in it but younger. Is it that one? Yes I've heard Southerners are really into not talking about feelings and being religious and ignorant unfortunately especially Texas with the ignorance, and Mississippi. Not all Midwest or Southern states are bad though I've heard good things about Utah Arkansas and Missouri so I guess Minnessotta is still coming around and older people are narrower
SillyGayBoy 1 year ago
@aaronlosing What kind of volunteer work do you do? Yeah it is sad that they have do have that pain and people are so selfish sometimes just doing what's right for them and not caring who it affects. I know one guy that had a depressed dad that killed himself and family members burned all of his photos claiming that since he was gay that's why the dad killed himself (which wasn't true). Some people just need someone to blame or turn away from.
SillyGayBoy 1 year ago
@SillyGayBoy That is awful. I do mostly homeless teen shelter volunteer work.
aaronlosing 1 year ago
Thanks for sharing and the advice sounds great and I am sure you are helping someone right now. You are a good person for trying to help others.
jamiegreuber 1 year ago
AWESOME VIDEO!!! Great tips!!!!
ItsXp3erynce 1 year ago
This video was amazing!! It helped a lot!! Thank You
TheJokerwise 1 year ago
You always have great advice. Don't worry about long rambling videos, I think thats what make your videos feel real. Great video :)
shadetree84 1 year ago
Thank you for sharing the point of not expecting the family to support you immediately. I have said that same thing to myself before but recently I have been struggling to remember it. It was good to hear it again from you.
Thank you for being a real and open and honest person. For sharing the parts of you that most people hide away. You are an inspiration!
DMacleod340 1 year ago
Nice intro
ZentnerM984 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
Ignore the guy that says u need a more serious intro, it's nice to see ur "not so serious" side too
ZentnerM984 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
Ignore the guy that says u need a more serious intro, it's nice to see ur "not so serious" side too
ZentnerM984 1 year ago
Ignore the guy that says u need a more serious intro, it's nice to see ur "not so serious" side too
ZentnerM984 1 year ago
I basically think you should stick to the more serious introductions. no offense but when your funny it's weird and kinda creepy.
Mathew9648 1 year ago
@Mathew9648 Life's too short to be serious all the time. I love to be funny, weird and creepy! :-)
KindaGayBlog 1 year ago 8
@KindaGayBlog Okay i respect that :) I guess it's just because you started off this channel a bit more serious. But go ahead and be creepy weird and funny, that's how I live my life. XD
Mathew9648 1 year ago
Great first tip. I was always concerned about the future and I missed out on a lot because of it :/
That was another good point about not expecting immediate support. It took about a month for my family to be comfortable with me again. My dad didn't talk to me for a little less than a week until he finally decided to talk about it with me and reassure me that I had his support.
I was so lucky to have my brothers support prior to telling my family. That really helped.
Great video! :)
Valcuric 1 year ago
@Valcuric So glad your family came around! Like anything else, it takes getting used to. Thanks for watching!
KindaGayBlog 1 year ago
happy come out day then:)
rayray2009able 1 year ago
@rayray2009able Thank you! :-)
KindaGayBlog 1 year ago
Happy coming out anniversary! Great feeling, isn't it?
Jimplicit 1 year ago
@Jimplicit It really is. So many great things have happened since I came out!
KindaGayBlog 1 year ago
There is something so rare and authentic about your videos, watching your videos you can really fell and see the emotion you have towards the topics you talk about. You’re making an impact, keep up the good work.
xX Alix.
TheAlixLondon 1 year ago 4
@TheAlixLondon Thank you for the support!
KindaGayBlog 1 year ago
Not sure why some comments are being flagged as spam! I'm unspamming them though! :-)
KindaGayBlog 1 year ago
thank you for staring your story
a40yearoldcub 1 year ago
Wow coming out on feb 14th, that's original x)
You're pretty much right about everything, and I can SO relate to virtually everything you said O_o For me, there was no hostility, at worst indifference (which is annoying but it could be worse I guess). About parents going through the same process to accept : hopefully it won't take them as long as me !! Cause at the moment, I can't talk about me being gay, and it gives the feeling they're not ok. Disappointing silence =/
GayGHvain87 1 year ago
@GayGHvain87 I'm not comfortable talking about my personal life and who I'm seeing with my parents. I'm pretty private about things. I'm just now mentioning my boyfriend in conversations and we've been together a year!
KindaGayBlog 1 year ago
ignore the Valentines ? you answered it right after I posted
depfox 1 year ago
@depfox Haha that's the bad thing about these long videos where I ramble! The information is very scattered! Thanks for watching Jay & Bryan! My partner is out to his mom and sister. He's pretty sure his dad would understand but he's never been that close to him.
KindaGayBlog 1 year ago
WOW...I didnt know that you came out to them on Valentines...I agree with you a 100% I also tell young people who are in college or high school that if you think your parents will use money as a weapon...dont do it untill you are ready to stand on your two feet...I agree with you that family is what you make it. My core Family is Bryan-Selena-Daniel...So why did you choose "Answered" How about your partner is he out to his family? He seems very shy.
depfox 1 year ago
WOW...I didnt know that you came out to them on Valentines...I agree with you a 100% I also tell young people who are in college or high school that if you think your parents will use money as a weapon...dont do it untill you are ready to stand on your two feet...I agree with you that family is what you make it. My core Family is Bryan-Selena-Daniel...So why did you choose Valentines day to come out? How about your partner is he out to his family? He seems very shy.
depfox 1 year ago
To be honest I think you need to watch the British documentary about gay life in Uganda! Its ****ing horrible! I think you will like it. after watching this, you will not only feel good to have come out, but you will always never take for sexual oreintation for granted! Trust me, it is the sadest thing to seee for any gay person. You really love your country! Although America is real bad at other points
sadguyfoundout1 1 year ago
Thanks for video ;-)
My grandpa has one friend, gay friend. He is over 60 now, but he is a great person. My parents know that he is gay, but they say, "Uhmm, that's not our business"
I still depend on them, it's my last year in school and I have to enter a university... Anyway, I don't know how they'll react, so I won't tell them about myself.
Thanks for video and advices ;-)
Olster94 1 year ago
I agree when you say that you don't have to tell everyone. My elderly parents don't need to know. They are Catholic, and I think it would only cause them more stress then joy at this stage of their life.
I'm totally fine with their not knowing.
SugarInHisBlood 1 year ago
Awesome bear growl!
But I did not know bears flexed!
GyThanksGd 1 year ago
@GyThanksGd lol they do on occasion! It's a rare sight!
KindaGayBlog 1 year ago
@GyThanksGd lol they do on occasion! It's a rare sight!
KindaGayBlog 1 year ago
@KindaGayBlog
So you are a rare type of bear?
Awesome, I knew you were unique from the beginning.
Please consider doing a shirtless video, since you are a liberated and proud gay man.
It does not need to happen that often, just as an occasional treat for your loyal fan(s).
GyThanksGd 1 year ago
Comment removed
GyThanksGd 1 year ago
So strange..
..I was planning on coming out to my mum today. Unfortunately I didn't get the opportunity, but now I'm kind of glad because I was able to watch your video first. Thank you. :)
TheLaughingOut 1 year ago
@TheLaughingOut Oh cool! Good luck with coming out to your mom. :-) Let me know if you have any questions.
KindaGayBlog 1 year ago
Great video Samuel! Fortunately I could come out to my family relatively easy and never experienced the struggle or agony of wondering if they would still love me. With my dad he did basically just "ok" and that was that. I was blessed to have such openminded, liberal and accepting parents. I only wish all people could have the unconditional love and support that I've had from friends/family.
acornsrus 1 year ago
@acornsrus That's really wonderful and amazing to hear! I'm so glad you never had to feel afraid of your own family and the ones who love you the most. It's a feeling that just eats you up inside until you realize it's never as bad as it seems.
KindaGayBlog 1 year ago