As a mother of a child with Aspergers, I personally want to slap this woman... YOU COLOSSAL MORON! Instead of talking to him, trying to calm him.. You shove a video cam in his face and ask dumb ass questions?? DO You Know ANYTHING about Aspergers? If so, WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING??? You Should be so totally ashamed of yourself and you call yourself a MOTHER?? You make me sick! I feel so bad for your little boy!! it breaks my heart!
@Caseybeth28 I agree so much - my aspie is now nearly 17 and I was told I had done such an amazing job that he now doesn't register on the scale, the doc said of course he will always have it but you have equipped him with skills to cope with life and he's well adjusted and seems a normal teen unless you really know him deeply - I beg this mum to change! There are many places to help you be a good aspie mum - online, support groups - anything but what you are doing honey - please!
@Caseybeth28 Like you, I do have reservations about what this mother is doing. His anger increases as she keeps filming him. She imposed a consequence, which led to the meltdown. She knows he is very angry with her; so she should just leave him alone for the time being.
@Caseybeth28 But I will say that she is handling the problem much better than other parents. She is trying to help him find ways to deal with his frustration and she is not yelling at or threatening him, imposing more consequences, or resorting to spanking or hitting.
Hello; I have no experience with such kids, but I missed one thing in the video - not telling him to stop, but EXPLAINING him. I would even maybe try a kind of emotional "blackmailing"...
Did you try responding to his acts in a manner "ouch, this hurt me" or "ouch, this hurt me, I will cry" or "ouch, why are you making me pain" or "why do you want me to feel pain"...
I wouldnt hesitate to experiment with other ways, like packing yourself to a ball and just leave any contact with him..
Funny thing is i have Asperger's and this never happens to me but I have a strong kind to wiggle a string to help me think why do i do this somebody pls reply.
And for the mom.....have you looked into therapeutic parenting? You really should have some sort of support in helping him and in dealing with his behaviors. While I know just as well as you do that you can't really "discipline" the way that other people do, there are things that you CAN do. You don't have to nor do you deserve to be abused by your child. It's not fun and there is a lot of learning, but it is way less stressful. Check out welcometomybrain [dot] net
I agree that there are a lot of things here that are very wrong in handling this child, but I want anyone that does NOT have an Aspi child to know that you can't change the behavior. It isn't bad parenting and it can get very exhausting dealing with these behaviors day in and day out. There are days that i just have to ignore it because I will totally not be able to cope, but the camera does not make the behavior worse...I promise.
@cathygivans1980 That is actually completely false. Behavior can always be changed, though of course it is difficult in humans because of our nature. It also requires consistency on the part of the adults. I agree that it is most definitely exhausting dealing with the behaviors. I've had first hand experience for a long time. And my experience is that the camera makes it substantially worse. That and talking to him in the midst of a meltdown, is at the top of the list of things not to do.
What is really frightening, is that I have viewed the behavior of several prison inmates in a series of actual prisons on MSNBC, and the buildup of frustration & rage in these convicts, very closely parralles that of your son. Your son will be in my prayers, and hopefully, a good psychiatrist will figure a way for your son to develop self control, before this screws up his life.
Im Glad you posted this video,though I'm sorry for the negative comments,my son was diagnosed last year with ASD,my son is quite similar,he would blow raspberries when he's having a moment.Have you tried him on Ambrotose?it has helped him immensly,hardly any meltdowns,just a thought.
well, personally, i think you could have empatized with your son and tried to help him to solve the problem. but fist put that damn camera away woman.
what purpose does this serve.. other then to humiltate, abuse & hurt your poor son .. turn it around .. if you were having a bad day & someone was repeatedly asking 'what' wrong" & filming you ... you'd get mighty annoyed .. yet you would have the power to stop it .. This is not great parenting .. this is harmful, hurtful & cruel... Cruel intentions that are self serving ... you seem to be the one who is repetitive .. stuck in a rut ... let go of your EGO .. woman & love your beautiful child...
I'm pretty sure that when he's hurting you throughout this video he simply wants a strong reaction, all of the points leading up to that within this video you either give him a monotone response that seems like you're in disregard or you egg him on with things like "You broke it so we have to throw it away." No emotion from you just somewhat of ridicule of his anger. If you would have empathized and perhaps been actively constructive then this would have gone better.
I'm wondering how it would play out if you put the camera away and left him be for a while? I'm sure he could find a less angry way to entertain himself until his PSP began to work again. I've never dealt with anything like this before other than my own anger so perhaps that may inflame the situation.
Ok, some people don't seem to understand what's going on. My daughter sometimes acts exactly like this, and NOTHING will calm her down. We're having her tested for Asperger's. Posters say "teach him to respect you" or "he knows Mom has no authority", and I tell you THAT LESSON DOES NOT SINK IN, no matter how many punishments or whatever you do. I scold my daughter (6) and she just scolds right back. This is NOT the mother's fault. She's just demonstrating it for people who don't understand it.
I really dislike the way your son is treating you and the environment. If I had an aspergers child, I wouldn't let him do what he does, just because you think you "can't" handle him. I would definitely higher someone who can actually teach him how wrong it is to be like that. Not that mumbai jumbo shit about "counselors." no matter how much the stakes are.
Well maybe if you stopped recording him you idiot! people with aspergers tend to think very logically so he probably knew that other kids dont know what aspergers is and that they'ed think he was mentally retarded, and then, you go and think you can upload to youtube and make everybody think he has anger issues!
PS. i have aspergers so i know what im talking about
Get the fucking camera out of his face! My God why don't you stop playing 20 questions with him and let him alone? Anyone would have a "meltdown" if they were interrogated in such a fashion when they are already frustrated. This is awful
@massacreman3000 and make things worse,good on you.I have an Autistic child so I know what I'm talking about.That child ain't naughty despite what you think.
@amy85ify nah, the kids pulling every trick in the book. He's pushing boundaries to see how far he can go, and then acting on where he can go (which in this video is basically as far as he wants)
@massacreman3000 so you're an expert on Autism and Aspergers now are you?You have no idea what it is so perhaps you should educate yourself before commenting.Maybe if you have a Autistic child oneday you'll understand,till then shut your mouth
@amy85ify Look out guys, were dealing with a badass over here.
But, no, really. Every person ive met that had this supposed "aspbergers" syndrome has been a normal person in every respect except they are slightly socially awkward.
Really, if you want your kid to develop, maybe learn discipline? Fuck if i know, but ive NEVER heard anything of this back before 1980.
The mother who filmed this is evil! Turn the camera off and stop laying on the couch taunting him. The only alternative she offered was video games. I think this was an attempt to show the world how abused she's been but instead it showed her to be an unfit parent.
This is appalling. Get the camera out of his face and maybe he'll settle down. Had it been me, I would have broken the camera already. His behavior is nothing compared to what I used to do as a kid. He would stop if you stopped recording him! He would at least be more likely to stop.
@MajorDGlories THE ONLY THING THAT BOY NEEDS IS ASS WHIPPED WITH A BELT ABOUT FOUR GOOD TIMES AND THEN HE WILL STFU WHEN I SAY STFU AND STFD WHEN I SAY STFD!
@whitetrashonky SCIENCE ISNT DIFFICULT USE WHAT WE HAVE LEARNED! do you understand the meaning of positive reinforcement? Hitler did! Use it on your kids, it worked on his?!we can all understand the devestating effect of negative reinforcement! lets let our kids watch tv! they see gangsters and they wanna be a gangster, imagine that
I had a ex boyfriend with Aspergers so I know exactly how they act but Ill tell you what this is not the way to respond. And not the influences you want a while who has a disability. Take away the video games and disconnect yourself from the gadgets and reconnect with your nurturing and dominate force as a mother. You sound like you are whinning about your brother or sister in this video. So disturbing.
Further more.. The child is just as obsessed with electronic as the mother is and following her example of avoiding reality. She is teaching him horrible habits. He doesnt respect her and knows she has no authority. And keeps seeing how far he can go with her. A bunch of empty threats from her so he goes further. So sad to see that parents dont even see their own faults and then when it comes out in the child they blame the child.
Are you kidding me?!! The mother is sitting there with her Facebook open emotionless not engaging in her child and interrogating and egging him on holding a freaking video camera! Shes not nurturing or engaged! You dont have to hit your kids to get them to listen to you. She keeps feeding her kid video games and is not being a involved parent. That kids craving a real life with actual attention paid to him.
Well. I have Aspergers. I have never acted like that, but my younger brother has. I was involved a lot in the "Calming Keigan Down" Session we had once every other day. He was a lot more volatile and destructive than your child, and I'm sure he would have been worse with a camera trained on him the entire time. But I could handle him better in worse situations, maybe because our brains worked on a similar frequency (So to speak).
I would usually hold him down (My brother), wrapping my feet around his waist from behind him and lightly locking my index finger and thumb around his wrists while I waited for him to calm down slightly.
I'm soo sorry I know exactly what your going threw my son has ADHD and Anger problems and now they are gonna do an evaluation for this now your son looked just like mine he does and says everything he did and he gets way worse I feel for u and support let me know please my email is amanda.Symanski@gmail.com please feel free to email me thanks Amanda
wow like I'm watching my child but with less language ,,, my son is almost 7 and is diagnosed
with aspergers syndrome adhd ocd anxiety and impaired impulse control.
I think these videos are good for people to see other parents go through the same .. I see yours likes to spit too thats mines favorite pastime especially at strangers while hes melting down in public.. is this a mild meltdown for you??? or was it just the beginning?
@cgholguin - DUMB ASS!! He is NOT misbehaving...He has AUTISM!! It's a disability " DUMB ASS"...NOT a behavioral problem. Go back to school! Your a imbarrasment to your mother and yourself!
It makes me so mad that people like you say shit like this and you don't even know what its like. YOU! don't know any tips, You don't have to right to say this is child abuse you know NOTHING. Narrow minding idiot's like you should just stick with cat videos. This is really good videos because it show what is a meltdown is and if you don't know what it is then how can you help. Dumbasses
Obviously, you assinine people have never had to deal with a child with aspergers. " I'm just talking to the ignorant assess ". She is being very calm and reacting in the right way. I have 2 children with aspergers. Along with myself also. So don't judge unless you have been there your self!
Thank you brave mom for this video! From the few comments I've seen it seems I am the only one who appreciates this. NO ONE understands AU/Explosive disorder,etc. What an inspiration to see how you react (or don't). What incredible patience! God bless you in your struggles! And thank you for making this REAL video available.
@undisputedgreatest Actually, you're the loser.these kids are pretty smart,they become doctors, scientists etc, they are good with numbers.I would rather have an autistic child than some normal brat of a child,i bet you were one hell of a brat.
@undisputedgreatest and also you have no idea how hard it is to parent children with a disability such as Autism so don't you say she is a bad mum, because she is an excellent Mother,she's probably a better parent than you!!!!
@eos420 Though I do agree with your comment. I do feel you need to grow up and use appropriate language. If you don't like it don't watch. It is not brain surgery.
maybe if you let him go outside he could get some sunlight and exercise. when sunlight hits the eyes the brain produces serotonin. exercise makes endorphins. hopefully the air is ok.
That's not the way you should treat your son, there's a lot more that can be done to address and reduce his stress level. If you don't know where to go for help, call the national crisis hotline: 1-800-273-8255
It's obvious you and your child need professional help.
My sister and I have Asperger's, and having meltdowns/anxiety attacks were a regular part of life for us and our parents for years. It was always little things that set us off- things that weren't going the way we'd wanted them to in our heads, sensory issues with clothing, etc.. This video feels alllll too familiar. We'd get in our modes, and only time and/or distraction would set us right again.
your tone of voice isn't showing him that you're being serious...quite frankly-this shows that you have almost given up. You're letting him take control. DON'T!
a place once. But it's selective at home when he's suppose to get something done. He loves computers and video games and says he wants to work for Nintendo. He calls up their tech support if he has a snafu with a game or system and talks shop with them for a long time. (in the last paragraph I actually meant to say that he has NOT mastered fine motor skills such as writing.)
Not be to disrespectful, but maybe if you just left him alone for a little while he'd cool down. He most likely doesn't want interaction at the moment, and certainly not to be recorded on video. Kids need to respect parents but parents also need to respect their children. The fact that he asked you to stop recording him, and you didn't, most likely made things worse. When social interactions are hard, being recorded on video is harder.
wow you people are wussies, hes havin a tantrum he needs to be disiplined, not just not by his momy 'that wasnt right to do' tell him to knock it off, if he doesnt take his xbox away or somehing, if he doesnt quit then u need to spank him, and if it goes past there he needs to have a one on one conversation with you- with mr.belt as the translator
@trippletrain77 Wow....you are some kind of autism spectrum expert. Cure them with a belt. Amazing. I hope you never have children and if you already do....I hope they do not have autism or any other disorder.
@DarkQuietWyattON ya its harse but after givin them warnings like i said, if pain compliance is what it takes to make them behave them you have to use it
@trippletrain77 Yeah, like I said. I hope you have no children and if you do, I hope they get taken away from you. You have no understanding of real autism although I imagine you will say how much of an expert you are. Mr Belt as the translator? I hope if you have children, Mr State DCFS steps in and puts them in proper homes. Pain compliance. Ok.Well the next time you boss asks you something you are unable or unwilling to do, I hope he takes you in a back room and cracks your head.
@DarkQuietWyattON trust me, im not a frickin pyscho like your saying, a kid isnt going to respond to you saying somethin like that wasn nice or whatever, maybe the last thing i said was a little harse but still telling the child its not right aint gona do crap, you at least have to ground them or something, and remember, I said the pysical punishment last, even I think it should only be used as a last option
My son who has Aspergers does not get as bad as that kid and if he goes too far I deal with it using good old fashion 'don't piss mom off.' If he does it when we are out I'll drag him into the bathroom and reprimand him if one is available. Otherwise I'll get in his face with an angry face and that usually works too. If I can't get him to calm down from the loud crying and screaming I send him to his room and tell him he can come out when he calms himself down. THEY CAN BE TAUGHT TO CONTROL IT.
@MsFrosteetoes - So using your criteria, Aspergers is just "bad behavior". You have got to be kidding me. Lady, I live in a residential school that specializes in ASD and trust me, you sometimes can't control it. I feel sorry your son has you for his mother. He can be taught coping strategies but "THEY CAN BE TAUGHT TO CONTROL IT" sounds more like you have a kid with behavior issues and not ASD which given what you described, sounds like a child you might raise.
@DarkQuietWyattON Who the hell are you to tell anyone how to raise their aspy child? I don't care if you lived with ASD kids or are one yourself. Everyone of them is different and unique just like everyone else. Also, not every symptom from the text books show up. Some of the kids are shy some of them are out going. Some can do math with little effort and some learned how to read at 2 1/2. My son was diagnosed by a qualified neurologist not some insulting hack from YouTube.
@MsFrosteetoes - Do you not see the hypocrisy in this statment. You seemed more than happy to tell the person who posted this video that you get in your son's face and how they can be taught to control it (implying the mother here was not controlling it). I was not teling you how to diagnose your child you diptwit. You left a message on this video implying how her child could control it. As person with ASD, I answered. Yes, on this I am a "hack from You Tube" but so are you and gosh oh golly....
@DarkQuietWyattON That's how you interpret what I said. You view it as criticism when it was not my intent. I was sharing my own experience and how I handled it. Saying, from my own experience, that it can be controlled was a suggestion and not a dig at the mother of the child in the video. If you are really ASD then it could explain how you would view my response. Your experience with ASD is not the same with other aspy kids or at least not with some.
@MsFrosteetoes Sorry then. I thought it was criticism and the poster of this video seems to have had a lot of criticism thrown her way. Maybe by the time I got to your comment was a little mad. I apologize. I really do have ASD. I attend a residential school in the USA that has several different programs. Autism is the big one and we have everyone from Aspies who don't seem autistic but apparently are, to people with severe mental retardation, are in wheelchairs and also happen to be autistic...
@DarkQuietWyattON It's ok. Let me ask you this. In your opinion, should kids with ASD be in inclusive class rooms with non aspie kids or separated from mainstream and placed in smaller classrooms with like wise kids? Another question is have you ever lived on your own independently or taken up a trade to make a living?
@MsFrosteetoes -I think it depends on the kids. I see good and bad. I kid with ASD in a mainstream classroom can be the target of bullies. A kid in a self contained classroom can be deprived of needed social skills. In this case, it depends on the kid in question. My step-brother is autistic and pretty severe and in junior high was in some mainstream classes and special ed classes throughout the day. Now he is a Freshman and he is only in special ed. They decided he needed the socialization in
@MsFrosteetoes junior high but needs more academic one on one in high school. I know my step-mom went into the schools to educate the kids about my step brother and she said that made a big difference. They were all very helpful and nice. I think if they don't know you are autistic then they think of you as strange and terrible but if they know its a medical condition, they are more willing to help.
@DarkQuietWyattON Hey, thank you for the dialogue. Your insight is appreciated. He's been in an inclusive class since he's started school. He's in 5th grade and would start middle school next year and that's where the anxiety starts. Intellectually he's matured but emotionally he's behind. As well as mastering his handwriting and he avoids art and any project where fine motor skills comes in to play. His memory is phenomenal with things like remembering how to get somewhere with only being at
@MsFrosteetoes Do the other kids know he is autistic or Aspergers? (sometimes the line is pretty clear and at other times its blurred). Middle School is the worst time to be honest. They start 5th grade as little kids and during those 4 years their brains mature, their bodies mature and their emotions are so jumbled (at least mine were and really still are). I was always terrible with fine motor skills. Some people just are.
What if you took him to the school he will be attending....
@MsFrosteetoes --I have not lived on my own and probably never will. I also do not work but I think I am capable of it. I know I am (maybe too lazy but I am capable). I will be in school here until my 22nd birthday and then I age out.
For me, once I hit about 13, I had severe depression. The depression became so hard for me to get out of that I really never did. Very long story that I hesitate to share with someone raising an autistic child but if you want it, you can email me directly
@MsFrosteetoes -My dad never wanted the kids to know I had ASD when I was younger and I think had my mother been allowed to tell the classes I had it and worked with them on understanding it, life would have been better. Kids in wheelchairs or with walkers or even downs syndrome (something visual) are not bullied as much as typical kids but an ASD kid is just seen as geeky and awkward. Once they know there is a medical condition, it does make a difference but not all kids would want that I know
@DarkQuietWyattON My son's father is in denial for the most part because he doesn't see the behavior as much as we do when he's home with us. What your mother did seems like a good idea but how did you feel when she did that?
@MsFrosteetoes Well I worshipped my mother because I didn't like my dad (he is a great guy but he was not around a lot and he is 6 foot 7 and has a pretty deep voice and a military bearing so he terrified me) so I clung to my mother. Yes...I admit it. I was a mama's boy. I was referred to as "the little prince"...so whatever she did I didn't question so much but I remember the spitting and I thought she was being unreasonable because you only have so much spit you can spew out but at the same..
@MsFrosteetoes -time, I was angry she made me do it. Looking back now, it was probably a great way to handle it. I used to have major meltdowns that had me destroying my bedroom. She would often sit in the room with me and guard the door and just let me go but when I was calm I had to help her clean up unless my meldtown ended with me just collapsing from exhaustion (which actually was often). While parents see meltdowns as problemati, they are frightening to some of us. You reach a point...
@MsFrosteetoes where you know you have lost control, any control and I don't like that feeling.Once I cross that threshold, it just feels terrifying. Maybe your son leaving the room with card is his way of trying to not go into a meltdown. I am betting for every meltdown he has, he has probably been able to keep 2 or 3 under control and maybe even to himself. People think our coping skills are bad but somtimes they are really good but because the really good, seems "normal" no one thinks about
@DarkQuietWyattON thx for this. my dd is aspie and I sometimes forget how bad things used to be. She would have about 20 meltdowns every morning before we left the house about every little thing. the wrong cup, cuffs on her coat, having to put on gloves, having to brush her teeth. She can go all day without a meltdown sometimes now and I forget how hard it is for her and how hard she tries. This has reminded me to apprieciate everytime she puts her socks on without a battle.
@MsFrosteetoes -how much struggling it takes to keep it together so we don't hear "good job" when we have averted a meltdown, because parents and teachers may not know we were on the edge. At least that is my case but all of us are different.I have a friend great at math. I am on a 3rd grade math level but I was reading college books (not in the classes just reading college level books) when I was 12 or so. The guy I now that is great at math has a low reading level. It just different for us
@MsFrosteetoes Oh and a father in denial...yeah...until I was about 15. However, he also seemed deep down to know there were some things I just could not control. It was the SIB that annoyed him. Scared my mom and made him mad. Go figure. We men huh?!? LOL (OK, I use the word man loosely here because I am about 5'2 and don't weigh 100 pounds so I can still get the 12 and under meals at restaurants so maybe I should say "we male folk" LOL
@MsFrosteetoes I do know two people with ASD who do live on their own. One works for a newspaper (I think he writes the sports section) and the other delivers pizza's part time and stocks shelves part time. I know 3 that are in college. I know one who works for the county filing court papers (she loves to file) but lives at home. I know another who works for a hotel chain checking the rooms after the maids have cleaned them and checking off what they did (he likes lists) but still lives at home
@MsFrosteetoes -thanks for telling me about symptoms of ASD. It's not like I live in a school where many of us have ASD and we are all different with different strengths and weaknesses. Some have learned how to do math and read? Really! Wow. Of course they have!!! So again, based on the fact that you felt the need to tell the poster of this video that her son could be taught to conrol (telling her how to raise her child in essence) yet are pop at my comment, I will write you off as an idiot
@DarkQuietWyattON Why don't you be useful and share how you learned to handle your situations as an aspy instead of being a total jerk off to people who are just sounding off sharing their opinions and experiences as parents of a child with ASD.Maybe you can be helpful. For example, what are your strengths or weaknesses? How did other kids treat you while growing up?
@MsFrosteetoes- Ok. I was "odd" and I didn't speak until I was about 6 (I cannot speak now but it is not autism related). My dad is an officer in the Air Force so when on bases, I was not picked on as badly because of the rank of my father. When in a public school I was bullied beyond belief. My mother was a sign language teacher and so sign is my first language. I would go home and tell her about my day in sign and that would help. My dad didn't accept my differences...he is "military".......
@DarkQuietWyattON Makes me sad. My son is becoming aware that kids are making fun of him behind his back and now they discovered some phobia's of his. (sound greeting or birthday cards, fake spiders.) He still cries when he doesn't get what he wants and this worries me because he will be in middle school next year. Have you ever taken any medication for ADHD or mood stabilizer?
@MsFrosteetoes I take zoloft, buspare, sonata, neurontin (I have seizures) and xanax. I have taken other things throughout the years (I am 20) but this combination seems to help right now. Sometimes what you we want seems so important to us. I sometimes still cry.
ROFL...sorry to laugh but the fake spider thing?! I totally understand. I am terrified of real or fake spiders although now I can't see them as I lost my sight but still...this is must be an ASD thing. I know MANY with this phobia
@DarkQuietWyattON You lost your sight? Is it a complication of the medications or the Aspergers? I am considering ADHD medications but we also want to be involved in a study for mood stabilizer to control the temper and crying. You should see how freaked out he get's with sound cards. He'll run out the room and won't come back in until the card is gone. But of course he has no issue with video game sounds. You seem very focused and engaging in this conversation. Thank you for sharing with me.
@MsFrosteetoes You know I will tell you but if people are reading this thread and not ready for the answer I hestitate to give it. I really only try to help and not cause fear but I also think people should know what they are up against and so I will leave it to you, if you want to know, I will be happy to tell you in private but no, it was not because of the meds. I have had no reactions to the meds.
Sound cards are like someone yelling "BOO" and scaring you. Like videos on You Tube where....
@MsFrosteetoes -where the video starts out great and then someone screams. I scream and ok....if startled enough I actually cry. Yes I know. Not very manly. I hate to have a horn honked at me and when I go to the synagogue and they have a cantor that has a uber soprano opera type chant, I have to actually put in my ear plugs. I have A LOT of supports. Video game sounds are expected but some video game sounds I have real issues with. Some I don't. I can't play them anymore but I hear them.
@MsFrosteetoes Ok...I have to go to class. You probably don't want my life story LOL. You are welcome to message me if you want. I apologize for taking your comment the wrong way. I just heard so many "whip his ass" comments that I was already getting angry but I know that's not much of an excuse. I hope your son finds some peace from the other kids. It's very hard. Have you tried the supplement 5HTP. I take it and I think it helps.
@DarkQuietWyattON What is 5HTP? No need to apologize. I understand where you are coming from now. I have never hit my kids, I couldn't bring myself to do that. Aspergers seems to be increasing with kids in recent years and they still don't know why. Except for dealing with the occasional temper tantrum and unnecessary crying I see it as a gift. I hope you see it as a gift too. You aspies are so smart and fun to be around. :o)
@MsFrosteetoes It is like an amino acid. It is like a mood stabalizer. To be honest, I am not really sure what it all contains. I know Wikipedia has an entry for it.
Aspergers and Autism both are increasing rapidly. I believe in NJ it is 1 in 90 boys (more boys have it than girls but from what I have experiences at school here, when girls get it they seem to be more severe, in general but that could be skewed. Most of the autistic girls I know are non-verbal. Some of the boys I know can speak
@MsFrosteetoes and all but one of the boys that cannot speak can either sign or use PEC's however on the flip side, the girls seem to be able to be toilet trained and I know 3 boys still in pull ups and one is 15. I have trouble seeing it as a gift. I admit that. I am not in the autism rocks group but I am not in the "we are awful" group. It is just a difference but sometimes I wish I didn't have it. I wish my brother didn't have it (well stepbrother) but we are who we are.
@MsFrosteetoes -and he was more "in your face" with me. Maybe now that I think about it, that is the wording that set me off. It scared me when he did that. He would shout and yell and sometimes I didn't know what he was upset about and I would start to shut down (not sure how to explain that one) and he would get more angry. My mom would step in before he would snap. My mom had a calming technique she would use. I would lay on the bed or the floor or the couch and she would rub my temples...
@MsFrosteetoes -and try to make me visualize Jello (I loved the stuff) and I remember her voice would be super soft. Then she would tell me to "try to think like the Jello" which I think was how she got a 6 year old to relax and I was not able to actually understand Jello didn't think LOL) and I would start to relax. Then she would put pressure on my shoulders, my stomach and then my calves (by just holding them tight and then letting go). She was talking the whole time. Often I had been crying
@MsFrosteetoes and as she did this she would wipe the tears away (well she did that first). I know she would make her voice go softer and softer until I could almost not hear her and then sometimes the next think I knew I was waking up in my bed, totally calmed down.
At other times she would just hold me and squeeze me really hard (I had and have a weighted vest but sometimes it's not enough) and that would calm me. She never forced me to look her in the eye (I was sighted back then)
@MsFrosteetoes When going someplace she would give me lots of advance notice and we almost always had the same routine until she became ill. If the routine was broken (usually by my father who was not often home and just his presence was a break in the routine) I had a hard time adjusting. If she knew when he was coming home, she would prepare me. When we moved, I was prepared but moves were always hard. New kids made for new bullies if I was in public school.
@MsFrosteetoes I know I used to spit and I remember she had me go to the sink one day and spit until she told me to stop. She was really calm about it but I was finally crying because you can only spit so much until you run out of spit and when I ran out, I was dry mouthed, thirsty and still supposed to spit. I am not sure I ever spit again. When I threw things in a major meltdown she would try to corral me and protect stuff. If I threw it in a tantrum and broke something, I had to throw a toy
@MsFrosteetoes of my own and break it. If what I had thrown was already a toy then I lost two toys. I stopped throwing in tantrums. I think the biggest thing my mom had problems with was that often my meltdowns brought on SIB and if I was not calmed down fast enough, I was scratched and bruised and bloody. Of course, meltdowns at school made me more of a target and that caused more meltdowns. Some schools had me wear a boxing helmet. That was humiliating and made me stand out more.
@DarkQuietWyattON - Amen to that! I couldn't have said it better myself. You clearly have a very good understanding on Autisma nd ASD kids. Thank you for all that you said on here. So many people think my kid is misbehaving or that I am a bad mother for staying calm and not jumping on to him and disiplining him for his behavior. I'm glad that you get it!
I only film him to educate people and to document for his doctors, upon their request.Thank you for your understanding.
@xlagirl -I live in a special needs school and have ASD. I try to fight the stupid comments people leave on some of these videos. Sometimes in answering people I find I have misunderstood what they say (happened once but it turned out to be great and made a friend because of my misunderstanding) but mostly the people leaving hate messages are those who have NO idea. They are trolls. They lead miserable lives and seek to make us miserable. Not on my watch!!!
@DarkQuietWyattON - Yeah, people are really mean and most don't have a clue about Asperger kids and they are so quick to judge me and my child without knowing us. I want to THANK YOU so much for all your comments and for fighting for Aspergers kids like yourself. Keep up the GREAT work! I hope the school your in is good and that you are being well taking care of there. I know it's hard work, but keep on fighting both for yourself and for other Aspie kids. :)
@MsFrosteetoes you can't really control the behavior, but you can teach them to calm down properly without hurting themselves.I think getting in your childs face would just make it worse,i know it does for my son who has Autism so I know what I'm talking about. And sending him to his room is sending a bad mesage there,he should sit in a special chair just for meltdowns.Sometimes just cuddling them is the best thing,it works for my boy at times.They get overstimulated.
@MsFrosteetoes you can't really control the behavior, but you can teach them to calm down properly without hurting themselves.I think getting in your childs face would just make it worse,i know it does for my son who has Autism so I know what I'm talking about. And sending him to his room is sending a bad mesage there,he should sit in a special chair just for meltdowns.Sometimes just cuddling them is the best thing,it works for my boy at times.They get overstimulated.
@MsFrosteetoes you can't really control the behavior, but you can teach them to calm down properly without hurting themselves.I think getting in your childs face would just make it worse,i know it does for my son who has Autism so I know what I'm talking about. And sending him to his room is sending a bad mesage there,he should sit in a special chair just for meltdowns.Sometimes just cuddling them is the best thing,it works for my boy at times.They get overstimulated.
omg...you have a smaller version of my son. I live it every day and this is heart breaking for any parent. She has the patience of Jobe and courageous to show what it can be like in a meltdown. I know exactly what you mean about making it worse by discipline. My son is now 5'11 and 250lbs. I can no longer restrain him and have to rely on my "bag of tricks" to avoid meltdowns or try to turn them around quickly. Those who don't walk in our shoes should not judge our parenting skills.
I was like this as a kid but I was, & still am, a hothead with a bad temper. If something doesn't go right I get ticked off quickly. I like to call myself a hotheaded Italian lol. However I never was diagnosed with aspergers, just a bad temper. My husband & I worry however that my son has aspergers but it's difficult because we can;t label every kid who gets angry over small things as having this, some kids just have worse tempers than others but you know yoru kid better than anyone else.
@queenstarsha - He is not a brat, he is AUTISTIC you fool~!! I do not think his disrespect it cute and you are obviously ignorant! You don't have a clue the world I live in everyday nor the world of a child with disabilities or mental illness. Violence only produces more violence with ASD kids! I am NOT lazy either! I hope you have an AUTISTIC child someday....only then will you see how stupid you are!
What we are seeing is just a short part of living day to day with a child in the spectrum. We can not judge, but only suggest. I suggest, that when behaviors like spitting, cursing and acting violent are shown, that he be restrained if positive direction is not working. I had a time out corner for years, and used it when my son was at melting point. It was a centralized cubical with sound proofing, head phones for him. Until he showed the behavior I needed from him.
I have an 8yr old son on the spectrum. Please show this to your child's psychologist. They might suggest that you close your laptop and engage your child in eye level conversation or physical activites. It's obvious he wants your attention & I realize we parents need breaks but shut off your Facebook, close the laptop and break out a board game instead of the xbox. This video shows you being lazy more than anything & that may not be accurate or out of context but it is what it depicts.
Hey I have worked with autistic children it's very hard when they have a meltdown watching this video also helps us to learn so thank you, it must be very difficult looking at some of the comments saying what they would do, it's not as easy as that is it? You seem to cope incredibly well,don't know if I could be as patient as you. Keep going your doing good job!
This is not a good example of how to work with children with Autism. The parent is not engaged with her son. She is on her computer, on Facebook, sitting on her butt recording him on video while repeating the same question over and over again. He behaves in this manner because there are obviously no consequences in this house because she did nothing to correct his behavior when he was throwing and cursing. My son is 8 & has Autism & he has rules. If he breaks them he loses privledges.
The first time he threw something at me, would have been the LAST time he threw something at me..... No matter what kind of disability he had......POINT BLANK...
=/ Sorry, not to be rude... But yeah, asking the same questions over and over would frustrate anyone.... (No. I'm not saying he doesn't have autism, it's obvious he does....) You should have probably just left him alone for a while to let him calm doqn and then tried to distract him with another game or something.... Just my opinion. c:
I used to have meltdowns like this, but worse. What helped me is to learn positive coping/venting methods... only then can you "talk" about feelings. You have to get a grip on the feelings before you can discuss it.
@xlagirl: Totally relate! My boyfriend's son has not been diagnosed yet, but i know it is going there. He also is fixated on the videos, even though we have completly promoted outside play, and taking him to places which allow for a physical outlet, i.e. water parks. When my boyfriend disciplines, the anger becomes ten fold. Looking at your vidoe is like looking at my boyfriend's son. How is your son emotionally/socially? Ours is at the developmental age of about a 4-6 year old (he is 10)
@xlagirl have you spanked him? I am not trying to be rude just wondered if you had or do. Because I found that spanking and time out are affective. Well good luck!(:
Well I have AS boyfriend, and being with him has learned to me that Aspergers are very true speaking and have strong sense of justice because they see all the sides of the things. Challenging behavior is maybe because they see something is happening wrong or isn't good enough. They also require a lot of themselves. He played a violin when he was child and one little mistake that he "hided" by playing different way allmost got him distraught later. It was wery embarrassing to him he said.
I understand it might be necassary to record his meltdowns to show to a doctor or therapist, but is it really necassary to post it for the world to see?
@misspinkpunkykat : I am very grateful that she posted this video, because I came directly here to learn more about my son's possible diagnosis; this is what the video is here for: VALIDATION; the comfort of knowing I am not alone; confirmation of symptoms; and relating are just a few of the experience I had when viewing the video. Thank you xlagirl for sharing your life with us, to help better our understanding of the syndrome.
@cgholguin He is wired differently to a normal child who would get a sharp smack and have it neatly imprinted "i shouldn't do that because mum smacked me and it hurt" It does NOT work for these kids. If anything if this kid is like mine you would smack him and he would likely smack you straight back or go into a full blown rage. Discipline is necessary for these kids absolutely, but a beat-down I'm afraid is just pointless. Gets you a sore hand, a ranting child, and no-one feels better.
Physical violence against another person should never be tolerated, and before anyone assumes that I know nothing about Autism, my son is Classic, so I understand it VERY well, and these children DO respond to positive and negative reinforcement for behaviors. Regardless of the meltdown, this young man should be sanctioned for any act of physical abuse toward another person.
This is what they are like. Anyone saying he needs an 'ass whooping' is clearly ignorant. I'm 15 and I have to live with my baby brother having times like these more than once every day, it breaks my heart and I know what I see.
As a mother of a child with Aspergers, I personally want to slap this woman... YOU COLOSSAL MORON! Instead of talking to him, trying to calm him.. You shove a video cam in his face and ask dumb ass questions?? DO You Know ANYTHING about Aspergers? If so, WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING??? You Should be so totally ashamed of yourself and you call yourself a MOTHER?? You make me sick! I feel so bad for your little boy!! it breaks my heart!
Caseybeth28 1 week ago
@Caseybeth28 I agree so much - my aspie is now nearly 17 and I was told I had done such an amazing job that he now doesn't register on the scale, the doc said of course he will always have it but you have equipped him with skills to cope with life and he's well adjusted and seems a normal teen unless you really know him deeply - I beg this mum to change! There are many places to help you be a good aspie mum - online, support groups - anything but what you are doing honey - please!
FIybreath 1 week ago
@Caseybeth28 Like you, I do have reservations about what this mother is doing. His anger increases as she keeps filming him. She imposed a consequence, which led to the meltdown. She knows he is very angry with her; so she should just leave him alone for the time being.
primerodimus1 5 days ago
@Caseybeth28 But I will say that she is handling the problem much better than other parents. She is trying to help him find ways to deal with his frustration and she is not yelling at or threatening him, imposing more consequences, or resorting to spanking or hitting.
primerodimus1 5 days ago
Wow u are 1 amazing lady! Bless u! :D
basindigo 2 weeks ago
Hello; I have no experience with such kids, but I missed one thing in the video - not telling him to stop, but EXPLAINING him. I would even maybe try a kind of emotional "blackmailing"...
Did you try responding to his acts in a manner "ouch, this hurt me" or "ouch, this hurt me, I will cry" or "ouch, why are you making me pain" or "why do you want me to feel pain"...
I wouldnt hesitate to experiment with other ways, like packing yourself to a ball and just leave any contact with him..
HomoScientificus 2 weeks ago
Funny thing is i have Asperger's and this never happens to me but I have a strong kind to wiggle a string to help me think why do i do this somebody pls reply.
baileybushey 2 weeks ago
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billiehere123 2 weeks ago
Work? Naw ima sit at home and troll my child who landed on the autism spectrum.
SwansongTV 2 weeks ago
Was this Filmed With A Toaster?
blevans100 2 weeks ago
That is so much me! The only difference is that im an aspi 37yo :'-(
karaflas1574 1 month ago
Did anyone ever stop to think that the DR may have wanted to see what was going on 1st hand instead of trying to go by word of mouth.
jewels3gs 1 month ago in playlist More videos from xlagirl
And for the mom.....have you looked into therapeutic parenting? You really should have some sort of support in helping him and in dealing with his behaviors. While I know just as well as you do that you can't really "discipline" the way that other people do, there are things that you CAN do. You don't have to nor do you deserve to be abused by your child. It's not fun and there is a lot of learning, but it is way less stressful. Check out welcometomybrain [dot] net
cathygivans1980 1 month ago
I agree that there are a lot of things here that are very wrong in handling this child, but I want anyone that does NOT have an Aspi child to know that you can't change the behavior. It isn't bad parenting and it can get very exhausting dealing with these behaviors day in and day out. There are days that i just have to ignore it because I will totally not be able to cope, but the camera does not make the behavior worse...I promise.
cathygivans1980 1 month ago
@cathygivans1980 That is actually completely false. Behavior can always be changed, though of course it is difficult in humans because of our nature. It also requires consistency on the part of the adults. I agree that it is most definitely exhausting dealing with the behaviors. I've had first hand experience for a long time. And my experience is that the camera makes it substantially worse. That and talking to him in the midst of a meltdown, is at the top of the list of things not to do.
MajorDGlories 1 month ago
What is really frightening, is that I have viewed the behavior of several prison inmates in a series of actual prisons on MSNBC, and the buildup of frustration & rage in these convicts, very closely parralles that of your son. Your son will be in my prayers, and hopefully, a good psychiatrist will figure a way for your son to develop self control, before this screws up his life.
emptynester7985 1 month ago
@emptynester7985 Invent parallels wherever you can. Rage is often expressed in the same fashion.
andrewkilroyable 1 month ago
Im Glad you posted this video,though I'm sorry for the negative comments,my son was diagnosed last year with ASD,my son is quite similar,he would blow raspberries when he's having a moment.Have you tried him on Ambrotose?it has helped him immensly,hardly any meltdowns,just a thought.
amy85ify 1 month ago
well, personally, i think you could have empatized with your son and tried to help him to solve the problem. but fist put that damn camera away woman.
callissialim 1 month ago
what purpose does this serve.. other then to humiltate, abuse & hurt your poor son .. turn it around .. if you were having a bad day & someone was repeatedly asking 'what' wrong" & filming you ... you'd get mighty annoyed .. yet you would have the power to stop it .. This is not great parenting .. this is harmful, hurtful & cruel... Cruel intentions that are self serving ... you seem to be the one who is repetitive .. stuck in a rut ... let go of your EGO .. woman & love your beautiful child...
mbgooley 1 month ago
I'm pretty sure that when he's hurting you throughout this video he simply wants a strong reaction, all of the points leading up to that within this video you either give him a monotone response that seems like you're in disregard or you egg him on with things like "You broke it so we have to throw it away." No emotion from you just somewhat of ridicule of his anger. If you would have empathized and perhaps been actively constructive then this would have gone better.
Heresy43 1 month ago
I'm wondering how it would play out if you put the camera away and left him be for a while? I'm sure he could find a less angry way to entertain himself until his PSP began to work again. I've never dealt with anything like this before other than my own anger so perhaps that may inflame the situation.
Heresy43 1 month ago
Ok, some people don't seem to understand what's going on. My daughter sometimes acts exactly like this, and NOTHING will calm her down. We're having her tested for Asperger's. Posters say "teach him to respect you" or "he knows Mom has no authority", and I tell you THAT LESSON DOES NOT SINK IN, no matter how many punishments or whatever you do. I scold my daughter (6) and she just scolds right back. This is NOT the mother's fault. She's just demonstrating it for people who don't understand it.
mightyd42 2 months ago
I really dislike the way your son is treating you and the environment. If I had an aspergers child, I wouldn't let him do what he does, just because you think you "can't" handle him. I would definitely higher someone who can actually teach him how wrong it is to be like that. Not that mumbai jumbo shit about "counselors." no matter how much the stakes are.
Superfreday 2 months ago
@Superfreday hiring someone doesnt actually solve the kids problems,they aren't naughty,they dont understand what being naughty is
amy85ify 1 month ago
this video was filmed with a potato.
Blitzkriegexe1 2 months ago
Edit: although he is acting a little bit bratty about his PSP and crap.
drbugbait 2 months ago
Well maybe if you stopped recording him you idiot! people with aspergers tend to think very logically so he probably knew that other kids dont know what aspergers is and that they'ed think he was mentally retarded, and then, you go and think you can upload to youtube and make everybody think he has anger issues!
PS. i have aspergers so i know what im talking about
drbugbait 2 months ago
Get the fucking camera out of his face! My God why don't you stop playing 20 questions with him and let him alone? Anyone would have a "meltdown" if they were interrogated in such a fashion when they are already frustrated. This is awful
1LittleSwimmer 2 months ago
Sorry, but smack that little bastard.
He's basically like any other kid, from what i can tell. And he needs a good smack to learn his place.
alternately, Yell, show him that you wont be pushed around. Learn some holds, and pressure points.
Spitting is disgusting and i would have already held him down and taught him a few new pressure points.
p.s. i don't care about 'ass-burgers' since its just a form of being not social.
massacreman3000 2 months ago
@massacreman3000 and make things worse,good on you.I have an Autistic child so I know what I'm talking about.That child ain't naughty despite what you think.
amy85ify 1 month ago
@amy85ify nah, the kids pulling every trick in the book. He's pushing boundaries to see how far he can go, and then acting on where he can go (which in this video is basically as far as he wants)
Can't help bad parenting =)
massacreman3000 1 month ago
@massacreman3000 so you're an expert on Autism and Aspergers now are you?You have no idea what it is so perhaps you should educate yourself before commenting.Maybe if you have a Autistic child oneday you'll understand,till then shut your mouth
amy85ify 1 month ago
@amy85ify Look out guys, were dealing with a badass over here.
But, no, really. Every person ive met that had this supposed "aspbergers" syndrome has been a normal person in every respect except they are slightly socially awkward.
Really, if you want your kid to develop, maybe learn discipline? Fuck if i know, but ive NEVER heard anything of this back before 1980.
Prove me wrong, then you may speak.
massacreman3000 1 month ago
@massacreman3000 they have their meltdowns too due to frustration and over stimulation.About the 1950's and on the numbers in Autism started to grow.
amy85ify 1 month ago
Perhaps it would have been better just to leave him alone. The videotaping seemed to be agitating him.
KEngel1021 2 months ago
this is fail.
TheSouperdude 2 months ago
The mother who filmed this is evil! Turn the camera off and stop laying on the couch taunting him. The only alternative she offered was video games. I think this was an attempt to show the world how abused she's been but instead it showed her to be an unfit parent.
sarahtalkpretty 2 months ago
eventhough this is hard to watch
im glad you posted it, i suspect a family member of mine
may have A.S. and I keep hearing about meltdowns,
and not sure what it looks like, or what to expect.
glad you had the courage to share the expirence,
and im glad you know not to punish in the "traditional way"
my heart goes out for you and your son.
PlusizePopstar 2 months ago
that ngga be trippin!
ultimateshe 2 months ago
This is appalling. Get the camera out of his face and maybe he'll settle down. Had it been me, I would have broken the camera already. His behavior is nothing compared to what I used to do as a kid. He would stop if you stopped recording him! He would at least be more likely to stop.
MajorDGlories 2 months ago 18
@MajorDGlories THE ONLY THING THAT BOY NEEDS IS ASS WHIPPED WITH A BELT ABOUT FOUR GOOD TIMES AND THEN HE WILL STFU WHEN I SAY STFU AND STFD WHEN I SAY STFD!
whitetrashonky 1 month ago
@whitetrashonky SCIENCE ISNT DIFFICULT USE WHAT WE HAVE LEARNED! do you understand the meaning of positive reinforcement? Hitler did! Use it on your kids, it worked on his?!we can all understand the devestating effect of negative reinforcement! lets let our kids watch tv! they see gangsters and they wanna be a gangster, imagine that
whitetrashonky 1 month ago
I had a ex boyfriend with Aspergers so I know exactly how they act but Ill tell you what this is not the way to respond. And not the influences you want a while who has a disability. Take away the video games and disconnect yourself from the gadgets and reconnect with your nurturing and dominate force as a mother. You sound like you are whinning about your brother or sister in this video. So disturbing.
APLSURVIVOR 2 months ago
Further more.. The child is just as obsessed with electronic as the mother is and following her example of avoiding reality. She is teaching him horrible habits. He doesnt respect her and knows she has no authority. And keeps seeing how far he can go with her. A bunch of empty threats from her so he goes further. So sad to see that parents dont even see their own faults and then when it comes out in the child they blame the child.
APLSURVIVOR 2 months ago
Are you kidding me?!! The mother is sitting there with her Facebook open emotionless not engaging in her child and interrogating and egging him on holding a freaking video camera! Shes not nurturing or engaged! You dont have to hit your kids to get them to listen to you. She keeps feeding her kid video games and is not being a involved parent. That kids craving a real life with actual attention paid to him.
APLSURVIVOR 2 months ago 6
My little brother has asperger's and he acts like this. Its so sad to watch him go through this.!
XxEscapeTeFatexX 3 months ago
Well. I have Aspergers. I have never acted like that, but my younger brother has. I was involved a lot in the "Calming Keigan Down" Session we had once every other day. He was a lot more volatile and destructive than your child, and I'm sure he would have been worse with a camera trained on him the entire time. But I could handle him better in worse situations, maybe because our brains worked on a similar frequency (So to speak).
enaidiZ 3 months ago
I would usually hold him down (My brother), wrapping my feet around his waist from behind him and lightly locking my index finger and thumb around his wrists while I waited for him to calm down slightly.
enaidiZ 3 months ago
@enaidiZ Then, some smooth talk about Zombies, and he was done with his tantrum.
enaidiZ 3 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
I'm soo sorry I know exactly what your going threw my son has ADHD and Anger problems and now they are gonna do an evaluation for this now your son looked just like mine he does and says everything he did and he gets way worse I feel for u and support let me know please my email is amanda.Symanski@gmail.com please feel free to email me thanks Amanda
alyssa692010 3 months ago
This seems so pretentious, how can you care for a child when you are holding a camera in your hands.
Your child isn't stupid. He knows what you are doing.
DOTA2Slippy 3 months ago 2
wow like I'm watching my child but with less language ,,, my son is almost 7 and is diagnosed
with aspergers syndrome adhd ocd anxiety and impaired impulse control.
I think these videos are good for people to see other parents go through the same .. I see yours likes to spit too thats mines favorite pastime especially at strangers while hes melting down in public.. is this a mild meltdown for you??? or was it just the beginning?
fatgirlbunnyful 3 months ago
@cgholguin - DUMB ASS!! He is NOT misbehaving...He has AUTISM!! It's a disability " DUMB ASS"...NOT a behavioral problem. Go back to school! Your a imbarrasment to your mother and yourself!
xlagirl 3 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
It makes me so mad that people like you say shit like this and you don't even know what its like. YOU! don't know any tips, You don't have to right to say this is child abuse you know NOTHING. Narrow minding idiot's like you should just stick with cat videos. This is really good videos because it show what is a meltdown is and if you don't know what it is then how can you help. Dumbasses
SuperFriendlyTroll 3 months ago
i have asperger syndrom and had those meltdowns before
TheWheatisHeat96 3 months ago
Wow. Her kid is angry. She is talking to him about how he feels and trying to help him find a solution to calm him.
Good luck with ur "reporting".
amberlfj3 3 months ago
Obviously, you assinine people have never had to deal with a child with aspergers. " I'm just talking to the ignorant assess ". She is being very calm and reacting in the right way. I have 2 children with aspergers. Along with myself also. So don't judge unless you have been there your self!
typeomeywisted13 3 months ago 4
Thank you brave mom for this video! From the few comments I've seen it seems I am the only one who appreciates this. NO ONE understands AU/Explosive disorder,etc. What an inspiration to see how you react (or don't). What incredible patience! God bless you in your struggles! And thank you for making this REAL video available.
aubrie42 3 months ago 2
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claireste 3 months ago
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claireste 3 months ago
@eos420 Couldn't agree with u more,
Glorpkinqzopst 3 months ago
I bet you wish you had a different kid. That kid will be nothing but a loser.
But then, you're probably a bad mother, too.
undisputedgreatest 3 months ago
@undisputedgreatest Actually, you're the loser.these kids are pretty smart,they become doctors, scientists etc, they are good with numbers.I would rather have an autistic child than some normal brat of a child,i bet you were one hell of a brat.
amy85ify 1 month ago
@undisputedgreatest and also you have no idea how hard it is to parent children with a disability such as Autism so don't you say she is a bad mum, because she is an excellent Mother,she's probably a better parent than you!!!!
amy85ify 1 month ago
@eos420 i agree stupid mom is filming him and wondering why is he mad. What an idiot.
defrancotv 3 months ago
@eos420 Though I do agree with your comment. I do feel you need to grow up and use appropriate language. If you don't like it don't watch. It is not brain surgery.
mjcamps1 4 months ago
maybe if you let him go outside he could get some sunlight and exercise. when sunlight hits the eyes the brain produces serotonin. exercise makes endorphins. hopefully the air is ok.
nelkenstock 4 months ago
That's not the way you should treat your son, there's a lot more that can be done to address and reduce his stress level. If you don't know where to go for help, call the national crisis hotline: 1-800-273-8255
It's obvious you and your child need professional help.
ontopofthe7thhill 4 months ago
My sister and I have Asperger's, and having meltdowns/anxiety attacks were a regular part of life for us and our parents for years. It was always little things that set us off- things that weren't going the way we'd wanted them to in our heads, sensory issues with clothing, etc.. This video feels alllll too familiar. We'd get in our modes, and only time and/or distraction would set us right again.
GiantPetRat 4 months ago
Fatass aspie tell him to lay off the "bergers" if you know
c0nqu3r3rlol 4 months ago
@eos420 i said the same thing. Seems more like a case of Munchausen by Proxy
jesskazen 4 months ago
your tone of voice isn't showing him that you're being serious...quite frankly-this shows that you have almost given up. You're letting him take control. DON'T!
TheMissq86 4 months ago
Where's his FATHER?
psx2514 4 months ago
a place once. But it's selective at home when he's suppose to get something done. He loves computers and video games and says he wants to work for Nintendo. He calls up their tech support if he has a snafu with a game or system and talks shop with them for a long time. (in the last paragraph I actually meant to say that he has NOT mastered fine motor skills such as writing.)
MsFrosteetoes 4 months ago
Not be to disrespectful, but maybe if you just left him alone for a little while he'd cool down. He most likely doesn't want interaction at the moment, and certainly not to be recorded on video. Kids need to respect parents but parents also need to respect their children. The fact that he asked you to stop recording him, and you didn't, most likely made things worse. When social interactions are hard, being recorded on video is harder.
anhonestword 4 months ago
wow you people are wussies, hes havin a tantrum he needs to be disiplined, not just not by his momy 'that wasnt right to do' tell him to knock it off, if he doesnt take his xbox away or somehing, if he doesnt quit then u need to spank him, and if it goes past there he needs to have a one on one conversation with you- with mr.belt as the translator
trippletrain77 4 months ago
@trippletrain77 Wow....you are some kind of autism spectrum expert. Cure them with a belt. Amazing. I hope you never have children and if you already do....I hope they do not have autism or any other disorder.
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@DarkQuietWyattON ya its harse but after givin them warnings like i said, if pain compliance is what it takes to make them behave them you have to use it
trippletrain77 4 months ago
@trippletrain77 Yeah, like I said. I hope you have no children and if you do, I hope they get taken away from you. You have no understanding of real autism although I imagine you will say how much of an expert you are. Mr Belt as the translator? I hope if you have children, Mr State DCFS steps in and puts them in proper homes. Pain compliance. Ok.Well the next time you boss asks you something you are unable or unwilling to do, I hope he takes you in a back room and cracks your head.
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@DarkQuietWyattON trust me, im not a frickin pyscho like your saying, a kid isnt going to respond to you saying somethin like that wasn nice or whatever, maybe the last thing i said was a little harse but still telling the child its not right aint gona do crap, you at least have to ground them or something, and remember, I said the pysical punishment last, even I think it should only be used as a last option
trippletrain77 4 months ago
@trippletrain77 - You truly are ignorant~!! He is NOT misbehaving.... HE HAS AUTISM!!
You are a natural born child abuser....and I hope to GOD that you never have any children, especially a child with disabilities!
xlagirl 3 months ago
My son who has Aspergers does not get as bad as that kid and if he goes too far I deal with it using good old fashion 'don't piss mom off.' If he does it when we are out I'll drag him into the bathroom and reprimand him if one is available. Otherwise I'll get in his face with an angry face and that usually works too. If I can't get him to calm down from the loud crying and screaming I send him to his room and tell him he can come out when he calms himself down. THEY CAN BE TAUGHT TO CONTROL IT.
MsFrosteetoes 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes - So using your criteria, Aspergers is just "bad behavior". You have got to be kidding me. Lady, I live in a residential school that specializes in ASD and trust me, you sometimes can't control it. I feel sorry your son has you for his mother. He can be taught coping strategies but "THEY CAN BE TAUGHT TO CONTROL IT" sounds more like you have a kid with behavior issues and not ASD which given what you described, sounds like a child you might raise.
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago 2
@DarkQuietWyattON Who the hell are you to tell anyone how to raise their aspy child? I don't care if you lived with ASD kids or are one yourself. Everyone of them is different and unique just like everyone else. Also, not every symptom from the text books show up. Some of the kids are shy some of them are out going. Some can do math with little effort and some learned how to read at 2 1/2. My son was diagnosed by a qualified neurologist not some insulting hack from YouTube.
MsFrosteetoes 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes - Do you not see the hypocrisy in this statment. You seemed more than happy to tell the person who posted this video that you get in your son's face and how they can be taught to control it (implying the mother here was not controlling it). I was not teling you how to diagnose your child you diptwit. You left a message on this video implying how her child could control it. As person with ASD, I answered. Yes, on this I am a "hack from You Tube" but so are you and gosh oh golly....
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@DarkQuietWyattON That's how you interpret what I said. You view it as criticism when it was not my intent. I was sharing my own experience and how I handled it. Saying, from my own experience, that it can be controlled was a suggestion and not a dig at the mother of the child in the video. If you are really ASD then it could explain how you would view my response. Your experience with ASD is not the same with other aspy kids or at least not with some.
MsFrosteetoes 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes Sorry then. I thought it was criticism and the poster of this video seems to have had a lot of criticism thrown her way. Maybe by the time I got to your comment was a little mad. I apologize. I really do have ASD. I attend a residential school in the USA that has several different programs. Autism is the big one and we have everyone from Aspies who don't seem autistic but apparently are, to people with severe mental retardation, are in wheelchairs and also happen to be autistic...
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@DarkQuietWyattON It's ok. Let me ask you this. In your opinion, should kids with ASD be in inclusive class rooms with non aspie kids or separated from mainstream and placed in smaller classrooms with like wise kids? Another question is have you ever lived on your own independently or taken up a trade to make a living?
MsFrosteetoes 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes -I think it depends on the kids. I see good and bad. I kid with ASD in a mainstream classroom can be the target of bullies. A kid in a self contained classroom can be deprived of needed social skills. In this case, it depends on the kid in question. My step-brother is autistic and pretty severe and in junior high was in some mainstream classes and special ed classes throughout the day. Now he is a Freshman and he is only in special ed. They decided he needed the socialization in
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes junior high but needs more academic one on one in high school. I know my step-mom went into the schools to educate the kids about my step brother and she said that made a big difference. They were all very helpful and nice. I think if they don't know you are autistic then they think of you as strange and terrible but if they know its a medical condition, they are more willing to help.
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@DarkQuietWyattON Hey, thank you for the dialogue. Your insight is appreciated. He's been in an inclusive class since he's started school. He's in 5th grade and would start middle school next year and that's where the anxiety starts. Intellectually he's matured but emotionally he's behind. As well as mastering his handwriting and he avoids art and any project where fine motor skills comes in to play. His memory is phenomenal with things like remembering how to get somewhere with only being at
MsFrosteetoes 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes Do the other kids know he is autistic or Aspergers? (sometimes the line is pretty clear and at other times its blurred). Middle School is the worst time to be honest. They start 5th grade as little kids and during those 4 years their brains mature, their bodies mature and their emotions are so jumbled (at least mine were and really still are). I was always terrible with fine motor skills. Some people just are.
What if you took him to the school he will be attending....
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes --I have not lived on my own and probably never will. I also do not work but I think I am capable of it. I know I am (maybe too lazy but I am capable). I will be in school here until my 22nd birthday and then I age out.
For me, once I hit about 13, I had severe depression. The depression became so hard for me to get out of that I really never did. Very long story that I hesitate to share with someone raising an autistic child but if you want it, you can email me directly
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes -My dad never wanted the kids to know I had ASD when I was younger and I think had my mother been allowed to tell the classes I had it and worked with them on understanding it, life would have been better. Kids in wheelchairs or with walkers or even downs syndrome (something visual) are not bullied as much as typical kids but an ASD kid is just seen as geeky and awkward. Once they know there is a medical condition, it does make a difference but not all kids would want that I know
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@DarkQuietWyattON My son's father is in denial for the most part because he doesn't see the behavior as much as we do when he's home with us. What your mother did seems like a good idea but how did you feel when she did that?
MsFrosteetoes 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes Well I worshipped my mother because I didn't like my dad (he is a great guy but he was not around a lot and he is 6 foot 7 and has a pretty deep voice and a military bearing so he terrified me) so I clung to my mother. Yes...I admit it. I was a mama's boy. I was referred to as "the little prince"...so whatever she did I didn't question so much but I remember the spitting and I thought she was being unreasonable because you only have so much spit you can spew out but at the same..
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes -time, I was angry she made me do it. Looking back now, it was probably a great way to handle it. I used to have major meltdowns that had me destroying my bedroom. She would often sit in the room with me and guard the door and just let me go but when I was calm I had to help her clean up unless my meldtown ended with me just collapsing from exhaustion (which actually was often). While parents see meltdowns as problemati, they are frightening to some of us. You reach a point...
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes where you know you have lost control, any control and I don't like that feeling.Once I cross that threshold, it just feels terrifying. Maybe your son leaving the room with card is his way of trying to not go into a meltdown. I am betting for every meltdown he has, he has probably been able to keep 2 or 3 under control and maybe even to himself. People think our coping skills are bad but somtimes they are really good but because the really good, seems "normal" no one thinks about
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@DarkQuietWyattON thx for this. my dd is aspie and I sometimes forget how bad things used to be. She would have about 20 meltdowns every morning before we left the house about every little thing. the wrong cup, cuffs on her coat, having to put on gloves, having to brush her teeth. She can go all day without a meltdown sometimes now and I forget how hard it is for her and how hard she tries. This has reminded me to apprieciate everytime she puts her socks on without a battle.
life247ish 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes -how much struggling it takes to keep it together so we don't hear "good job" when we have averted a meltdown, because parents and teachers may not know we were on the edge. At least that is my case but all of us are different.I have a friend great at math. I am on a 3rd grade math level but I was reading college books (not in the classes just reading college level books) when I was 12 or so. The guy I now that is great at math has a low reading level. It just different for us
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes Oh and a father in denial...yeah...until I was about 15. However, he also seemed deep down to know there were some things I just could not control. It was the SIB that annoyed him. Scared my mom and made him mad. Go figure. We men huh?!? LOL (OK, I use the word man loosely here because I am about 5'2 and don't weigh 100 pounds so I can still get the 12 and under meals at restaurants so maybe I should say "we male folk" LOL
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes I do know two people with ASD who do live on their own. One works for a newspaper (I think he writes the sports section) and the other delivers pizza's part time and stocks shelves part time. I know 3 that are in college. I know one who works for the county filing court papers (she loves to file) but lives at home. I know another who works for a hotel chain checking the rooms after the maids have cleaned them and checking off what they did (he likes lists) but still lives at home
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes -thanks for telling me about symptoms of ASD. It's not like I live in a school where many of us have ASD and we are all different with different strengths and weaknesses. Some have learned how to do math and read? Really! Wow. Of course they have!!! So again, based on the fact that you felt the need to tell the poster of this video that her son could be taught to conrol (telling her how to raise her child in essence) yet are pop at my comment, I will write you off as an idiot
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@DarkQuietWyattON Why don't you be useful and share how you learned to handle your situations as an aspy instead of being a total jerk off to people who are just sounding off sharing their opinions and experiences as parents of a child with ASD.Maybe you can be helpful. For example, what are your strengths or weaknesses? How did other kids treat you while growing up?
MsFrosteetoes 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes- Ok. I was "odd" and I didn't speak until I was about 6 (I cannot speak now but it is not autism related). My dad is an officer in the Air Force so when on bases, I was not picked on as badly because of the rank of my father. When in a public school I was bullied beyond belief. My mother was a sign language teacher and so sign is my first language. I would go home and tell her about my day in sign and that would help. My dad didn't accept my differences...he is "military".......
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@DarkQuietWyattON Makes me sad. My son is becoming aware that kids are making fun of him behind his back and now they discovered some phobia's of his. (sound greeting or birthday cards, fake spiders.) He still cries when he doesn't get what he wants and this worries me because he will be in middle school next year. Have you ever taken any medication for ADHD or mood stabilizer?
MsFrosteetoes 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes I take zoloft, buspare, sonata, neurontin (I have seizures) and xanax. I have taken other things throughout the years (I am 20) but this combination seems to help right now. Sometimes what you we want seems so important to us. I sometimes still cry.
ROFL...sorry to laugh but the fake spider thing?! I totally understand. I am terrified of real or fake spiders although now I can't see them as I lost my sight but still...this is must be an ASD thing. I know MANY with this phobia
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@DarkQuietWyattON You lost your sight? Is it a complication of the medications or the Aspergers? I am considering ADHD medications but we also want to be involved in a study for mood stabilizer to control the temper and crying. You should see how freaked out he get's with sound cards. He'll run out the room and won't come back in until the card is gone. But of course he has no issue with video game sounds. You seem very focused and engaging in this conversation. Thank you for sharing with me.
MsFrosteetoes 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes You know I will tell you but if people are reading this thread and not ready for the answer I hestitate to give it. I really only try to help and not cause fear but I also think people should know what they are up against and so I will leave it to you, if you want to know, I will be happy to tell you in private but no, it was not because of the meds. I have had no reactions to the meds.
Sound cards are like someone yelling "BOO" and scaring you. Like videos on You Tube where....
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes -where the video starts out great and then someone screams. I scream and ok....if startled enough I actually cry. Yes I know. Not very manly. I hate to have a horn honked at me and when I go to the synagogue and they have a cantor that has a uber soprano opera type chant, I have to actually put in my ear plugs. I have A LOT of supports. Video game sounds are expected but some video game sounds I have real issues with. Some I don't. I can't play them anymore but I hear them.
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes Ok...I have to go to class. You probably don't want my life story LOL. You are welcome to message me if you want. I apologize for taking your comment the wrong way. I just heard so many "whip his ass" comments that I was already getting angry but I know that's not much of an excuse. I hope your son finds some peace from the other kids. It's very hard. Have you tried the supplement 5HTP. I take it and I think it helps.
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@DarkQuietWyattON What is 5HTP? No need to apologize. I understand where you are coming from now. I have never hit my kids, I couldn't bring myself to do that. Aspergers seems to be increasing with kids in recent years and they still don't know why. Except for dealing with the occasional temper tantrum and unnecessary crying I see it as a gift. I hope you see it as a gift too. You aspies are so smart and fun to be around. :o)
MsFrosteetoes 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes It is like an amino acid. It is like a mood stabalizer. To be honest, I am not really sure what it all contains. I know Wikipedia has an entry for it.
Aspergers and Autism both are increasing rapidly. I believe in NJ it is 1 in 90 boys (more boys have it than girls but from what I have experiences at school here, when girls get it they seem to be more severe, in general but that could be skewed. Most of the autistic girls I know are non-verbal. Some of the boys I know can speak
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes and all but one of the boys that cannot speak can either sign or use PEC's however on the flip side, the girls seem to be able to be toilet trained and I know 3 boys still in pull ups and one is 15. I have trouble seeing it as a gift. I admit that. I am not in the autism rocks group but I am not in the "we are awful" group. It is just a difference but sometimes I wish I didn't have it. I wish my brother didn't have it (well stepbrother) but we are who we are.
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes -and he was more "in your face" with me. Maybe now that I think about it, that is the wording that set me off. It scared me when he did that. He would shout and yell and sometimes I didn't know what he was upset about and I would start to shut down (not sure how to explain that one) and he would get more angry. My mom would step in before he would snap. My mom had a calming technique she would use. I would lay on the bed or the floor or the couch and she would rub my temples...
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes -and try to make me visualize Jello (I loved the stuff) and I remember her voice would be super soft. Then she would tell me to "try to think like the Jello" which I think was how she got a 6 year old to relax and I was not able to actually understand Jello didn't think LOL) and I would start to relax. Then she would put pressure on my shoulders, my stomach and then my calves (by just holding them tight and then letting go). She was talking the whole time. Often I had been crying
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes and as she did this she would wipe the tears away (well she did that first). I know she would make her voice go softer and softer until I could almost not hear her and then sometimes the next think I knew I was waking up in my bed, totally calmed down.
At other times she would just hold me and squeeze me really hard (I had and have a weighted vest but sometimes it's not enough) and that would calm me. She never forced me to look her in the eye (I was sighted back then)
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes When going someplace she would give me lots of advance notice and we almost always had the same routine until she became ill. If the routine was broken (usually by my father who was not often home and just his presence was a break in the routine) I had a hard time adjusting. If she knew when he was coming home, she would prepare me. When we moved, I was prepared but moves were always hard. New kids made for new bullies if I was in public school.
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes I know I used to spit and I remember she had me go to the sink one day and spit until she told me to stop. She was really calm about it but I was finally crying because you can only spit so much until you run out of spit and when I ran out, I was dry mouthed, thirsty and still supposed to spit. I am not sure I ever spit again. When I threw things in a major meltdown she would try to corral me and protect stuff. If I threw it in a tantrum and broke something, I had to throw a toy
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes of my own and break it. If what I had thrown was already a toy then I lost two toys. I stopped throwing in tantrums. I think the biggest thing my mom had problems with was that often my meltdowns brought on SIB and if I was not calmed down fast enough, I was scratched and bruised and bloody. Of course, meltdowns at school made me more of a target and that caused more meltdowns. Some schools had me wear a boxing helmet. That was humiliating and made me stand out more.
DarkQuietWyattON 4 months ago
@DarkQuietWyattON - Amen to that! I couldn't have said it better myself. You clearly have a very good understanding on Autisma nd ASD kids. Thank you for all that you said on here. So many people think my kid is misbehaving or that I am a bad mother for staying calm and not jumping on to him and disiplining him for his behavior. I'm glad that you get it!
I only film him to educate people and to document for his doctors, upon their request.Thank you for your understanding.
xlagirl 3 months ago
@xlagirl -I live in a special needs school and have ASD. I try to fight the stupid comments people leave on some of these videos. Sometimes in answering people I find I have misunderstood what they say (happened once but it turned out to be great and made a friend because of my misunderstanding) but mostly the people leaving hate messages are those who have NO idea. They are trolls. They lead miserable lives and seek to make us miserable. Not on my watch!!!
DarkQuietWyattON 3 months ago
@DarkQuietWyattON - Yeah, people are really mean and most don't have a clue about Asperger kids and they are so quick to judge me and my child without knowing us. I want to THANK YOU so much for all your comments and for fighting for Aspergers kids like yourself. Keep up the GREAT work! I hope the school your in is good and that you are being well taking care of there. I know it's hard work, but keep on fighting both for yourself and for other Aspie kids. :)
xlagirl 3 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes there are such a variety of levels/severities within the autism spectrum... no they ALL cannot be taught to control it
aubrie42 3 months ago
@MsFrosteetoes you can't really control the behavior, but you can teach them to calm down properly without hurting themselves.I think getting in your childs face would just make it worse,i know it does for my son who has Autism so I know what I'm talking about. And sending him to his room is sending a bad mesage there,he should sit in a special chair just for meltdowns.Sometimes just cuddling them is the best thing,it works for my boy at times.They get overstimulated.
amy85ify 1 month ago
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@MsFrosteetoes you can't really control the behavior, but you can teach them to calm down properly without hurting themselves.I think getting in your childs face would just make it worse,i know it does for my son who has Autism so I know what I'm talking about. And sending him to his room is sending a bad mesage there,he should sit in a special chair just for meltdowns.Sometimes just cuddling them is the best thing,it works for my boy at times.They get overstimulated.
amy85ify 1 month ago
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@MsFrosteetoes you can't really control the behavior, but you can teach them to calm down properly without hurting themselves.I think getting in your childs face would just make it worse,i know it does for my son who has Autism so I know what I'm talking about. And sending him to his room is sending a bad mesage there,he should sit in a special chair just for meltdowns.Sometimes just cuddling them is the best thing,it works for my boy at times.They get overstimulated.
amy85ify 1 month ago
No shit, get up and whip his ass. If he has so much energy and likes to throw things then get him off the video games and into some sports.
fuckoff5233 4 months ago
Video games are the root to problems like this. I have Asperger's and we had strict rules about video games.
davidwilcoxfan 4 months ago
omg...you have a smaller version of my son. I live it every day and this is heart breaking for any parent. She has the patience of Jobe and courageous to show what it can be like in a meltdown. I know exactly what you mean about making it worse by discipline. My son is now 5'11 and 250lbs. I can no longer restrain him and have to rely on my "bag of tricks" to avoid meltdowns or try to turn them around quickly. Those who don't walk in our shoes should not judge our parenting skills.
editbay1 4 months ago
I was like this as a kid but I was, & still am, a hothead with a bad temper. If something doesn't go right I get ticked off quickly. I like to call myself a hotheaded Italian lol. However I never was diagnosed with aspergers, just a bad temper. My husband & I worry however that my son has aspergers but it's difficult because we can;t label every kid who gets angry over small things as having this, some kids just have worse tempers than others but you know yoru kid better than anyone else.
Anglynn74 5 months ago
He is just being a fucking brat...why do u think it's cute for him to be disrespectful? You are being a lazy parent.
queenstarsha 5 months ago
@queenstarsha - He is not a brat, he is AUTISTIC you fool~!! I do not think his disrespect it cute and you are obviously ignorant! You don't have a clue the world I live in everyday nor the world of a child with disabilities or mental illness. Violence only produces more violence with ASD kids! I am NOT lazy either! I hope you have an AUTISTIC child someday....only then will you see how stupid you are!
xlagirl 3 months ago
Hit him on the head with a baseball bat! that would surely get him to calm down, hopefull forever! if you know what I mean. no threat intended
multisnootylives1 5 months ago
@multisnootylives1 FUCK OFF CUNT
sufeewi 5 months ago
@multisnootylives1 - All I can say to you is "DUMB ASS"
xlagirl 3 months ago
What we are seeing is just a short part of living day to day with a child in the spectrum. We can not judge, but only suggest. I suggest, that when behaviors like spitting, cursing and acting violent are shown, that he be restrained if positive direction is not working. I had a time out corner for years, and used it when my son was at melting point. It was a centralized cubical with sound proofing, head phones for him. Until he showed the behavior I needed from him.
sandrajeanification 5 months ago
I have an 8yr old son on the spectrum. Please show this to your child's psychologist. They might suggest that you close your laptop and engage your child in eye level conversation or physical activites. It's obvious he wants your attention & I realize we parents need breaks but shut off your Facebook, close the laptop and break out a board game instead of the xbox. This video shows you being lazy more than anything & that may not be accurate or out of context but it is what it depicts.
drgonzoswife 5 months ago
Hey I have worked with autistic children it's very hard when they have a meltdown watching this video also helps us to learn so thank you, it must be very difficult looking at some of the comments saying what they would do, it's not as easy as that is it? You seem to cope incredibly well,don't know if I could be as patient as you. Keep going your doing good job!
Kantaiabi 5 months ago
This is not a good example of how to work with children with Autism. The parent is not engaged with her son. She is on her computer, on Facebook, sitting on her butt recording him on video while repeating the same question over and over again. He behaves in this manner because there are obviously no consequences in this house because she did nothing to correct his behavior when he was throwing and cursing. My son is 8 & has Autism & he has rules. If he breaks them he loses privledges.
drgonzoswife 5 months ago
The first time he threw something at me, would have been the LAST time he threw something at me..... No matter what kind of disability he had......POINT BLANK...
cheermagazine 5 months ago
So this kids over here renacting king kong and interrupts your session of farmville, so you whip out the camera to record it...
Boxlinger 5 months ago 5
=/ Sorry, not to be rude... But yeah, asking the same questions over and over would frustrate anyone.... (No. I'm not saying he doesn't have autism, it's obvious he does....) You should have probably just left him alone for a while to let him calm doqn and then tried to distract him with another game or something.... Just my opinion. c:
DoorFamelicious 5 months ago
His mum is handling him rong. I don't blame him
flicksharpe1 5 months ago
I used to have meltdowns like this, but worse. What helped me is to learn positive coping/venting methods... only then can you "talk" about feelings. You have to get a grip on the feelings before you can discuss it.
motleyminded85 5 months ago
your not helping him by filming him and asking him the same questions
jamstamanify 5 months ago
maybe he doesn't like to be filmed too much. He seems like a young lion in cage. Maybe he tries to show his unease. Good luck!
astroalex19 5 months ago
@xlagirl: Totally relate! My boyfriend's son has not been diagnosed yet, but i know it is going there. He also is fixated on the videos, even though we have completly promoted outside play, and taking him to places which allow for a physical outlet, i.e. water parks. When my boyfriend disciplines, the anger becomes ten fold. Looking at your vidoe is like looking at my boyfriend's son. How is your son emotionally/socially? Ours is at the developmental age of about a 4-6 year old (he is 10)
DKJK888 5 months ago
@xlagirl have you spanked him? I am not trying to be rude just wondered if you had or do. Because I found that spanking and time out are affective. Well good luck!(:
ProductionTimeKiller 5 months ago
@ProductionTimeKiller - Spanking doesn't work with Autistic children. But thank you for your comments.
xlagirl 3 months ago
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NamekianPikkoro7 2 months ago
Well I have AS boyfriend, and being with him has learned to me that Aspergers are very true speaking and have strong sense of justice because they see all the sides of the things. Challenging behavior is maybe because they see something is happening wrong or isn't good enough. They also require a lot of themselves. He played a violin when he was child and one little mistake that he "hided" by playing different way allmost got him distraught later. It was wery embarrassing to him he said.
Drunkensailor213 5 months ago
I understand it might be necassary to record his meltdowns to show to a doctor or therapist, but is it really necassary to post it for the world to see?
misspinkpunkykat 5 months ago
@misspinkpunkykat : I am very grateful that she posted this video, because I came directly here to learn more about my son's possible diagnosis; this is what the video is here for: VALIDATION; the comfort of knowing I am not alone; confirmation of symptoms; and relating are just a few of the experience I had when viewing the video. Thank you xlagirl for sharing your life with us, to help better our understanding of the syndrome.
DKJK888 5 months ago 2
I'd be pissed too if I was upset and my parent just kept filming me.
misspinkpunkykat 5 months ago
@cgholguin He is wired differently to a normal child who would get a sharp smack and have it neatly imprinted "i shouldn't do that because mum smacked me and it hurt" It does NOT work for these kids. If anything if this kid is like mine you would smack him and he would likely smack you straight back or go into a full blown rage. Discipline is necessary for these kids absolutely, but a beat-down I'm afraid is just pointless. Gets you a sore hand, a ranting child, and no-one feels better.
Mandy09Cheal 5 months ago
well then maybe you shoundt film him!
conrad3867 5 months ago
Physical violence against another person should never be tolerated, and before anyone assumes that I know nothing about Autism, my son is Classic, so I understand it VERY well, and these children DO respond to positive and negative reinforcement for behaviors. Regardless of the meltdown, this young man should be sanctioned for any act of physical abuse toward another person.
gguuffrr 5 months ago
This is what they are like. Anyone saying he needs an 'ass whooping' is clearly ignorant. I'm 15 and I have to live with my baby brother having times like these more than once every day, it breaks my heart and I know what I see.
CaitiPotatie 5 months ago 2
It's so good that you video taped it because I think my son has it too and many people that are not with him all the time are unbelieving.
KidsAndCompany200 6 months ago