Mature love is "I need you because I love you" whereas immature love is "I love you because I feel I need you." This observation is so true, that what many people who have never learned what it means to truly love view it through a possessive, "needy" lens. A very important note to self indeed.
Good job on your first Fromm reflection! I liked how you brought up a couple of good points and related them to your own life and experiences. I thought you observation of people who run away from problems because they don't have the patience to try to work things out with their partner was especially interesting. I can imagine how easy it could be run away rather than address the problems. I think this might be the vulnerability that Brene Brown would want to embrace. Good job! -Jyo
"No one knows the true meaning of love." Nicely said, I think this is true in the sense that love is a very personal thing, and everyone experiences it differently so that it can't really be put under one definition. It's also true that we've got to adjust to our partners in a relationship. It takes effort & sacrifices to make something like that successful. You seem to be taking a lot from this class, nice
Good job explaining the difference between the two types of love you presented and how you relate that to your relationships. Your clarification between the two allows some understanding in how they relate to our relationships that we attempt to have. The distinction between "liking" and "loving" is an important one, and can only be understood in the way that your perceive it.
"Love is more complicated than I thought." I thought the same thing! It's great to hear you consider the different interpretations of love ("I need you, I love you" vs. "I love you, I need you") and the different pitfalls that people often face, such as getting bored and leaving. It's clear that you are having your ideas challenged and asking good questions about love, which I think is one of the main objectives of this course. Well done and great video!
You brought up a very important point about how two people in a relationship need to be able to adjust to each other as their relationship goes on. You're right about the uncertainty when people get into a relationship of whether that other person is truly the "right one," and being able to adjust when your partner doesn't necessarily fit your image of who they are is crucial. It's great that you're able to look at your parents and grandparents as examples. Great job.
Your points about love were really great. Before taking this course, the definition of love was something I struggled with as well. As Fromm mentions, many people mistake possession (or as you said, "I need you, I love you") for love. Our culture feeds us a lot of verbiage about love, and hearing Fromm's answer can be really powerful.
You brought up an interesting point about how a person in a relationship sometimes needs to adjust to their partner. Not everything meets our expectations, and I agree that a lot of people find it easier to just quit when the problem can actually be fixed. You emphasized the importance of two people working together, which I think fits into our conversation about selfishness.
Mature love is "I need you because I love you" whereas immature love is "I love you because I feel I need you." This observation is so true, that what many people who have never learned what it means to truly love view it through a possessive, "needy" lens. A very important note to self indeed.
-Nate
MVSFromm 9 months ago
Good job on your first Fromm reflection! I liked how you brought up a couple of good points and related them to your own life and experiences. I thought you observation of people who run away from problems because they don't have the patience to try to work things out with their partner was especially interesting. I can imagine how easy it could be run away rather than address the problems. I think this might be the vulnerability that Brene Brown would want to embrace. Good job! -Jyo
MVSFromm 9 months ago
Amanda,
"No one knows the true meaning of love." Nicely said, I think this is true in the sense that love is a very personal thing, and everyone experiences it differently so that it can't really be put under one definition. It's also true that we've got to adjust to our partners in a relationship. It takes effort & sacrifices to make something like that successful. You seem to be taking a lot from this class, nice
Max
MVSFromm 9 months ago
Amanda,
Good job explaining the difference between the two types of love you presented and how you relate that to your relationships. Your clarification between the two allows some understanding in how they relate to our relationships that we attempt to have. The distinction between "liking" and "loving" is an important one, and can only be understood in the way that your perceive it.
- Caroline
MVSFromm 9 months ago
Amanda,
"Love is more complicated than I thought." I thought the same thing! It's great to hear you consider the different interpretations of love ("I need you, I love you" vs. "I love you, I need you") and the different pitfalls that people often face, such as getting bored and leaving. It's clear that you are having your ideas challenged and asking good questions about love, which I think is one of the main objectives of this course. Well done and great video!
-Ellen
MVSFromm 9 months ago
Amanda,
You brought up a very important point about how two people in a relationship need to be able to adjust to each other as their relationship goes on. You're right about the uncertainty when people get into a relationship of whether that other person is truly the "right one," and being able to adjust when your partner doesn't necessarily fit your image of who they are is crucial. It's great that you're able to look at your parents and grandparents as examples. Great job.
-Bob
MVSFromm 9 months ago
Amanda,
Your points about love were really great. Before taking this course, the definition of love was something I struggled with as well. As Fromm mentions, many people mistake possession (or as you said, "I need you, I love you") for love. Our culture feeds us a lot of verbiage about love, and hearing Fromm's answer can be really powerful.
Great job!
-Claire
MVSFromm 9 months ago
Amanda,
You brought up an interesting point about how a person in a relationship sometimes needs to adjust to their partner. Not everything meets our expectations, and I agree that a lot of people find it easier to just quit when the problem can actually be fixed. You emphasized the importance of two people working together, which I think fits into our conversation about selfishness.
Great video!
-Caitlin
MVSFromm 10 months ago