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From: jaeness
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  • Who are you to judge? I am talking to the conjectures below about learning your native language and tell us your real name, etc. That is disrespectful. I have an older sister and she is Korean and adopted by my father before I was born. She doesn't know how to speak Korean because she was raised in the U.S. In pennsylvania. And she kept her original name but just because she doesn't speak Korean, doesn't mean she is rejected by or not fully embracing her ethnicity.

    I am half Korean and half wh

  • Awww. How sad.

  • He doesn't exactly sound white so asian ppl do have different vocal chords than white ppl. 

  • ching chong ling long ting tong!!!!!

  • @Obbieafri Are you retarded or something? I thought the whole im korean made it pretty clear that he's not CHINESE. Fail attempt at trying to do the Chinese imitation thing. I guess you cant even understand your own language. Pity

  • Thank you for sharing your story.

  • Also, I love Asian culture (don't know why, since I am of Swedish heritage) My beliefs are new age (so I believe in reincarnation) we are all adopted. The spirit of adoption (that is what wanting to adopt is called) finds some. I was a little hesitant about adopting from China after seeing 'Gotcha Day' adoption vids (where parents meet their kids) and seeing that many asian children seemed to be frightened by europeans. I did have concerns about the children, not myself. Hope this helps

  • Hello, I was looking into adopting 2 girls from China a few years ago, before my long term marriage ended. Now, I am probably out of the age range to adopt. My reasons for wanting to adopt were that I did not like being pregnant and giving birth. I have one daughter and wanted more children. I wanted to adopt from China because at the time I was researching, there was a great deal of info about Chinese girls being unwanted. My daughter is an adult now and wants to adopt after college.

  • Dude, you look okay. Remember, don't give your child away like your parents did. If you can't afford your child, don't get one, seriously. Be who you are, people respect you.

  • I totally agree w/you!! I also adopted. :) :)

  • Biological parents are crap in some cases, as i know most of adoptees were orphan before adopted. I believe people naturally have sentiment toward to people who raise them up and give love to them. Not those who abandon kids but keeping having sex (keeping abandon)

    Look forward, don't look back, hurts, painful...

  • @SuperBlacx Wow you have much to learn, you're repeating propaganda and stereo types which are myths in the majority of cases. Better read and learn the history of adoption and the time lines also may want to read how the industry counsels mothers to relinquish rights out of love so that the agency can make their money, please do your research thanks!

  • @raffynjenny You simply missed my point.

  • We hope our child(ren) will be able 2 celebrate their country of origin, be proud of it & incorporate it into their life as much as possible. My husband is West-Indian but was born in US while dad was here for college, moved back 2 Caribbean, then back 2 US. Half his family live in the Caribbean and half in US. He is very much American to me but he's very proud Trini. Our home/lives are completely infiltrated with Indian/West-Indian culture. It makes our lives more interesting and wonderful.

  • I sometimes feel bad to say that I am EXCITED about adopting, because the only reason adoption exists is because there is pain and loss in this world. My husband and I just want to give someone the best of who we are and what we have. We have a home/family and want to share it with a boy/girl who has lost theirs. Love the world, make it a better place...hopefully we can pass that on to our child(ren).

  • My hubby & I have chosen international adoption as the only means of having our own children. This is our FIRST choice. We r just beginning the long process of adoption, but we r already SO EXCITED about meeting our future son or daughter. Spend LOTS of time wondering where he/she will be from, what he/she will look like, what he/she's personality will be like. I already love this person who is conceived in our hearts...just the thought of him/her. Long, difficult process but worth it!

  • As an international adoptee, THIS I THE TOUGHEST THING U WILL EVER DO. IT IS NOT EASY AND THERE ARE NO SHORTCUTS! :)

  • @christomt7 most pap's choose international adoption because they don't want to have to worry about a mother changing her mind and don't want to have to worry about the mother possibly being in her own child's life. What most Ap's don't know or realize is that a lot of these international adoptions are actually trafficked babies and children stolen from their parents, there is big money over there that is why there is so much corruption, even so called ethical agencies are not ethical at all!

  • I don't think you should ever feel that you have to constrain your truth or your experience to a particular emotional "tone". If something depresses you, let it be. Let the record stand. What other people think doesn't matter, and I don't think you should feel bad because you're not presenting a "happy" truth. It's your truth, and you should be able to speak it without feeling like you have to change it for anyone.

    -Joe (A Native American Adoptee)

  • @ilovetenchi21 Amen you speak volumes of TRUTH, society,especially our adoptive parents, their friends an other family members expect us to be grateful for losing our native tongue our families maternal and paternal, losing our home land our people.This grateful mindset is WRONG, I will never be one to lie just to appease my adoptive family, I will live truth and speak my truth and every other adoptee should as well, I wasn't rescued from a horrible fate, my life was altered as was my mother's

  • My 2 year old was born in Pusan and my 6 year old in Daegu South Korean. We adopted them when they were each a year old.  Thanks for posting this. I worry about how they will feel, what they will think, etc as they grow up. It's great to get some insight into your life.

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  • @nursewithapurse then leave them alone and let them be you are not superior to their home families and culture, so selfish, you know they kick and scream yet can only think of your self and now the child will be made responsible to care about your feels and stroke your ego as you want to be considered a saintly person, your mind set disgusts me!

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  • Too much too comment on bro... I'm an adopted Korean and I think there r 2 major schools of thought regarding where adopted Asians stand...then there r the secondary issues and concepts which blend into the main idea....I'm gonna post a video response to ur vid...

  • we could be related buddy.

  • Er wurde in Pusan geboren.

  • thank you for this!

    on an unrelated note. if you spike your hair and had a cleaner tighter cut you wouldlook so much better.

  • What makes you think that your mother didn't want you? I know what I went through in the states in a maternity home in the early 80s.There are no words to describe how the social workers could make you feel so low.I kept my baby.But the social workers and society made it even harder than it should have been.I lived in the states.I can only imagine the difficult choice your mother made.Was she even given a choice?I had no choice in the 80s. I literally stole my choice to keep my own baby. Hugs.

  • Im adopted from Taiwan (: I grew up pretty well, lol I love my adoptive family (:

    but, I do feel very outcast compared to my asian friends ..

    I stay up at night as well, I wonder if my birth mother ever thinks of me :o

    and, no i've tried to find them, but I never really got to it. Part of me is

    angry at them, but then again i dont know. I never really talk about this adopted

    stuff to anyone .. :O

  • I am a Chinese adoptee. I was born in Hefei, Anhui, China. And my adoption was planned before I was even born. Growing up as an adoptee, I didn't live where many asian people were, mostly around Caucasions. So I never realised I was a different race really. Being adopted made me feel like there was a certain kind of bond that I'll never have with my adoptive parents. It leaves me with an empty space in my heart that was supposed to be filled with my real parents.

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  • I don't know if you still post videos.. but I see YouTube comments are for retards, or idiotic teen age kids who have only one hobby: Going to the mall and smoke pots. American kids are pathetic. (Not all, though) In this way, you were not missed out anything. You just don't admit that there is nothing wrong with your childhood.

  • @wolverline2 Haha well said.

  • @wolverline2 i feel so sad for being an american T.T but you are right. 99.9% are doing that very few dont *sigh*

  • Bravo to you for being so open and sharing your story. And PS, you're hot. 

  • @djmixnmagic I try ;)

  • Hey! You are very strong, I like that! I wish you all the best in the future!

  • This is why couples should think twice about adoption making sure the couples can stay together and provide stable enviroment for these children. Jaeness, I hope I can help you in someways, I can not imagine what must have been like growing up without your biological family. There are few ways to find your birth parents in Korea and one of them is to appear on one of the TV shows, that is the best option.

  • Thanks for your insight... I have three much younger brothers (6, 8, 10... I'm 24) that were all adopted from South Korea. They all have different birth mothers, and were all adopted seperately. I'm interested to see what their reactions will be when they get older.

  • Why do you think a Korean child put up for adoption was unwanted? There are cases where the mother had to give the child up for adoption. There are cases where some of them thought their child was going to live with someone else temporarily and later found out the child was sent overseas to live with complete strangers and take their name as his or her own.

  • all of my friend who were adopted feel a sense of loss and abandonment no matter how wonderful their adoptive parents were, it is only natural. enjoy your vids. A LOT.

  • i was shipped over here..lol..that sounds funny(don't get me wrong)..

  • @heomak yeah like you are an object. i thought that too.

  • ur not unwanted!! u shouldn't feel that way,

    and i thought this vid might help? idk./....

    Adoption Stories from Korea

  • if your a parent adopting a child, they should be loving and understanding,,,,

    i actually haven't really met an azn adoptee yet, only one family, this couple had three adopted children, im not sure if they were all brothers or not, but they would always come to our donut store so that their children won't feel left out because they look diferently than their parents....

    i can't understand how you feel 100%,

    but, i can understand.. i hope that you find your old parents,

    and you AREN'T unwanted,

  • @yooligurl that's why you were adopted~!

    and i'm pretty sure your parents have had problems and couldn't take care of you.

    I guess....im not really sure why ppl adopt children without thinking their conscience ?

    and i'm guessing most adoptees would feel left out a lot because their parents don't look like them, and they get teased

  • Right now I'm pregnant with my half white/half Korean baby. My ex was Korean from Korea and we broke up already. I cannot raise the baby by myself. I have no job and no college degree. I don't want my baby to suffer because it doesn't have all the opportunities. I'm really heartbroken that I cannot raise it and it's difficult for me, I love my baby already and it's the hardest decision ever. I would love to have my kid placed in a wonderful home. It would make me feel so happy for my baby.

  • I understand that your life must have been sometimes hard... since you were raised by parents who are foreign to you (you didnt really specify, but Im guessing they are white). But in some ways I'm sure you are blessed, a home, food, friends, etc. I would really like to know more about your story and the outcome of your search!!! (this is a 2007 video... not sure if you will answer but Ill wait *hopes*)

    Oppa, btw you are so cute!!!

  • My dad was adopted and he was really blessed because if he would have been raised by his biological parents his life would have been much harder!!

  • Don't worry!! just be happy you din;t grow up to be a sweat shop owner full of Philippics and Mexicans

  • Actually my dad is adopted and he doenst event want to know who are their real parents, in his heart my grand-mother is her real mom and for me its my real grand mother, its only not biological but who cares seriously, a family is more that having the same blood no?

  • I'm in the process of adopting a child from Korea. I thank god everyday that he gave me a 2nd chance of having a child, tho it won't be my biological child but it doesn't matter. I know i will love him as my own. I can't have any kids on my own due to some infertility problems. anyway, i'm waiting for my little angel from korea. can't wait to meet him.. :)

  • I feel the same way as you do as a half Korean.

  • Whoo-whoo! Busan pride! That's my Korean hometown too! I know some about Korean oversees adoption.

    I gotta say...you are HOTTT!!! Why aren't more Korean men like you. To me anyway, you look kinda hapa (half white/half korean) like me.

  • Also...what is funny is that i see alot of adopted people looking for thier real family and usually accept them to visit for a chat and meeting but then it makes u wonder why the heck u gave ur child up for adoption in the 1st place. Of course there are some very genuine and lagit reasons for doing it but honestly...why do it if u still wanna meet the child that u put up for adoption, u gave them up yet your concerned and wanna see em . makes me confused

  • honestly....I think it is sad that people put there kids up for adoption, but it happens and even tho it seems unfair remember there are others who dont have loving parents weither adopted family or not, some ppl how have been adopted get abused and hurt by thier adopted family...as long as u have a home and people who love you as if u were thier own , consider urself luck.

  • I am a very young and fertile-heterosexual woman and I want to adopt instead of having a biological child.

    As you know, society places value on being "blood related." However, if I am paying, feeding, loving, and stressing over a child then that is going to be MY child. I want to adopt because adding more people to this planet is not necessary when there are plenty of children who need a home. Also, having stretch marks and not being able to walk does not appeal to me (pregnancy)...lol

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  • @MrFlyingPanda

    I'm not even really sure what you are mad at here.

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  • just hiphoconnoisseur comment ... if i read a note from my mother that one of her motiv to adopt me is to not have stretch mark... ffs wake up

  • You're to be commended for your thinking. Too bad the world doesn't have more people like you. Yes, you're right on all points so I don't understand why you'd get "thumbs down" for your comment.

  • you know you are fuckin hot right?

  • Someone posted about adoptees acting like victims. Well, adoptees have had an experience most kids haven't.

    I was diagnosed, out of the blue, with breast cancer at 41. I felt like a victim and that emotion almost ruined me. I learned that life isn't fair and that very few other people my age understood that. Cancer made me "different" But it made me a better person,too. One day it will help me help my son. I am not saying adoption is cancer! Its a unique life experience that forces you to grow.

  • My son is also from Pusan. You ask "what would make someone want to take in an 'unwanted' child and raise them as your own".

    Well. First of all, I never felt he was unwanted. His birthpartents just couldn't care for him. Otherwise she would have aborted.

    I have a bio daughter and another adopted daughter and adore him as my only son and as the "baby" of the family. And he is spoiled and his sisters always complain. But that is how I see him. My baby boy. Not, my "adopted" baby boy.

  • If my son wants to visit his birthmom in Korea I will support him. I think of her on his birthday every year. I don't feel threatened by it, I think it is silly to feel that way. He is my son in all the ways that matter to me. He is hers, too. That's just the way it is. The heart should have a large enough capacity to love.

    I also always felt like an outsider as a kid. I was a first generation American and never felt like I fit in, either.

  • Hey I grew up in Pusan, nice city. Wish you all the luck on finding your parents :)

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  • 100percentDannyb, it sounds like you need some more of those medications you were talking about in an earlier post. I completely stand by everything I said about thinking it's lame to coddle and poor-baby these adoptees to death. Empathize, yes, but don't treat them as some kind of victims. They had wonderful parents who loved them, etc. No one's childhood is peaches and smooth sailing all the way through, so let's quit acting like adoptees are victims. It's sickening.

  • sndblstr did I ever say I felt like a victim?? No. I stated how I feel. Did you even read my post? I didn't say I have it worse then anyone else (THIS IS THE SECOND TIME SAYING IT). So WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT.

  • I'm done messaging you because my point should be through your thick skull already and if not, too bad.

  • Busan is a great place...you should visit when and if you can...:)

  • Its not POOR WHINY ME YOU MOTHER FUCKER IM ACTIVLY TRYING TO FIND SOME SORT OF PEACE AND TO BETTER MY SELF BUT LIKE OTHER PEOPLE IT ISNT EASY AND IM JUST SAYING MY THOUGHTS. YOU FAGGIT

  • are you adopted? Do you even know me? do you know our interactions?! Sure like i said before it a blessing but it has it downsides you fucking faggit. NOW SHUT THE FUCK UP

  • sndblstr fuck you

  • live it and then talk to me about it faggit. O yea your mr tough guy right? Yea obviously shit is tough on everyone all around pussy im just saying the way I feel about it and its not whineing you punk mother fucker its just what ive been through

  • i'm a korean adoptee ...came here from inchon south korea at 6 months of age too. I didn't feel different. I was chosen. There is nothing wrong with that. i understand where you're coming from. id like to talk to ya sometime and just chat. im curious about your thoughts and feelings..-becky

  • I am a Korean adoptee. I was also born in Pusan City and sent to Seoul. I will be 27 next month. I don't know any other Korean adoptees so watching your video and knowing that other people feel the same as me has really helped me emotionally. I am at the beginning of my search for my family. Thank you for sharing your story.

  • @mmcnally13 I don't know why I didn't respond to this until now. If you find any information, I'd really like to know. Please send me a message letting me know how things turned out!

  • There's nothing wrong of being adopted. As long as you feel confident about your self. there's nothing to worry about. Don't listen to jerks who are telling you that you are different or jerks who are teasing you. :) As long as your family and friends are there to support you and be there when you need them :|

  • I really admire the messages that Asian adoptees are trying to send. Keep up the good work and we're here to support you.

  • Hi I'm a 12 year old Korean boy. I was adopted when I was 3 months old and my parents were very young. My mom was 16 and my dad was 18. I wish i could see them sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo­oooo badly. I will soon though.

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  • I think the biggest hurt of being adopted is the issue of abandonment. Even though you have people around you that care for you, its hard for you to care for yourself. For example I've tried numerous ways to boast myself esteem but nothing works. I go to college and work but that still doesn't stop my suicidal tendencies. I've had to go to the hospital several times and were prescribed numerous medications but you can't mask the pain of not being wanted by your REAL PARENTS

  • how can you say "real parents"? the adoptive parents are the real parents. adoption is a wonderful thing. how ungrateful and what an insult to the people who raised you to say how miserable you are, etc.

  • I think he means biological parents.

    maybe..?

  • I was replying to a previous commenter. Of course he/she means biological parents, but it's a stupid way to phrase it. After whining about suicidal tendencies and depression supposedly caused by his/her parenting situation growing up, the commenter writes, "I've had to go to the hospital several times and were [sic] prescribed numerous medications but you can't mask the pain of not being wanted by your REAL PARENTS." This kind of pathetic nonsense should not be coddled or tolerated.

  • In other words, yes, there are special issues to deal with, etc. with regard to adoption. However, the poor-me-whining has got to stop. Being raised by a parent or parents unable to properly take of you is not getting a great lottery ticket in life; being raised by a couple able to provide a great life and a lot of love is getting a great lottery ticket in life. There is nothing weird about being raised by parents of another race. It's a non-issue.

  • That a boy sndblstr don't reply back you FAGGET

  • What a bunch of idiotic and misinformed comments by sndblstr. Do some research and have some empathy for others before you start spouting off nonsense.

  • I'm an adopted Korean as well, to me its a gift and curse. It's a gift because your given a chance to live and live a better life however, not having some one to really connect with and understand you SUCKS. I've contacted and met my birthmother and sisters from Korea and I really miss them. I'm studying the language and plan to keep our relationship strong. Growing up was a bitch but hey, life isn't easy. If you have any questions or need help feel free to ask.

  • This is very inspiring, thank you for this video! I'm an Korean adoptee and I do wonder about my birth parent sometimes. I will continue to watch and see what happens, thank you again.

  • I am the mother of 2 adopted Korean children, age 12 and 10. My children, like you, were never someone elses'  "unwanted "children. They were born into unfortunate circumstances that did not allow them to be raised by their birth parents. By the grace of God, I was granted the extreme blessing of becoming their mother. Adopted children need to know that they are truly loved and wanted by not only their adopted families, but by the birth parents who were unable to care for them.

  • dear susie,

    i am adopted. Unfortunately it really doens't work that way. For adopted kids or adults to process the idea "my birthparents loved me, therefore they abandonned me" is just about impossible to make sense of. Many adoptees have to come to terms with the trauma of the loss of the original parents, which frankly can take a lifetime. Sweeping this trauma under the carpet makes things worse. An adoptive parent should be as open to their kids as possible, incl. their possible grief.

  • I am Canadian but teach English in Seoul. My colleage is Korean and was adopted by a family in Colorado. He has a great family but doesn't want to get to know his biological parents. He said "what if i discover my mother was a drug dealer, prostitute, or even poor". "If she was any of those things it would make my life difficult and depressing". So for him he feels he's better off not knowing about his biological family.

  • Hey!! i was adopted!!! but for me it's much harder since i was adopted when i was 11!!

  • I am a Korean. Some of adoptees came back to Korea and found their birth parents and forgave and understood them. I saw some of them in the TV program which was so moving. I heard many adoptees are struggling to find their identity, but I believe if you guys become parents, you can forgive and love your birth parents who might suffering with guiltiness and yearning for their entire lives. I just hope you guys are happy and have your own beautiful family in the future!! Good luck~~^^

  • hi.. i cant have children so my husband and i are planning to adopt maybe from korea or philippines as we are of asian origin. i agree with mikavr..you are so wanted and i cant describe the joy i feel for having the chance to raise a child

  • As a soon to be adoptive mom, I couldn't help but notice what you said about "unwanted children". Perhaps it was a slip of the tongue, or maybe it's deeply how you feel. But I thought I'd let you know that you are NOT unwanted, in fact the opposite, you are SO wanted!

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  • @Mikavr everytime i see YT s with a non-white baby, it makes me sick.they should stick with their own kind. thieveing pigs stealing some poor third world woman's baby i.e. madonna, fishlips-angelina jolie.

  • If I were you, I wouldn't think of it as racist. I would think of it as just your own person. Just be yourself. "Be your own person".

  • i'm not saying anything you haven't already heard but thank you for sharing this one piece of your life. you're well spoken on the subject :)

  • I always wanted a Korean brother. I don't have a brother. I would like to have a brother from Korea.

  • ,,do you think it's racist you never thought of having an African brother ?,,,lol

  • From the Korean friends I have I have a third party perspective of what Korean are like. Koreans seem to have a rich history that dates more than 5000 years and due this history that is longer than Christianity and the bloodline that has stayed relatively pure it is like a salmon or homing pigeon coming home. Not all but the majority of Korean want to find who and what they are relative to History. Children always come back home at the end !!! P.S. Korean culture and history pre-dates the west.

  • khmerdog: calm down. he's sharing very personal information and i'm sure that disrespectful comments like yours are unwanted.  i'm a korean adoptee too and frankly i find your line of thinking offensive. maybe you have serious emotional/moral issues about adoption, but that doesn't give you the right to use hateful, angry language at other people.

  • maybe u like life but i don't. i shouldn't exist.

  • Khmerd0g,

    before i start, please learn to use the english language a bit better. it would make me hate you less if your opinion had been worded strongly instead of your mess of words only consisting of simple sentences and words shorted for online use.

    i understand the hurt and neglect that all adoptees feel, but to say we should be aborted or never exist, well that is just downright stupid. there are a million reasons you could have been given up, being an "accident" is only one of them.

  • and even if the truth ends up that your biological parents didn't mean to have you, so what? it doesn't make you worth any less because it wasn't planned.

    why do you hate that you were adopted so much? i have questions, and things damn near haunt me about my past, but i never hated that part about me. understand it as best as you can, because it is a very large part of you, and it is never going away.

  • aeness,

    I do not support any form of adoptions.

    However, I think it is best to adopt children to adopting parents of closest racial and cultural liking.

    Korea has approved of adoption with financial and physical well being only and disregarded racial/discrimmination issues.

    Till Korea understands or face up to racial issues, more babies will be sent abroad and the sad story will repeat.

    Korea internal adoption rate has to increase and social stigma of single mom has to be removed.

  • while korea is at it changing hundreds of years of social structure and culture, they can cure cancer, invent a flying car that runs on happiness and dreams, and the fastest/cheaptest/telepathic computer that everyone has been asking for.

    i'm pro choice, don't get me wrong, but to not support adoption based on race, well, i have no idea how that makes sense. why does race matter in adopting a child. the point is to give someone a better life than they would have gotten.

  • basing an adoption on the race of the people who want a child would be the stupidest and worst thing that an agency could do. that in itself is racial discrimination, and would only further the problem.

  • jaeness - one cannot exclude people simply due to race but race has to considered since your race is important. You may or may not remember your parents but they are folks who look like you, Korean. There is nothing wrong with trying to create a family environment that closest resemble your lost family - if possible. For too long, Korean govt exluded this issue and thought only finances mattered. Your race/culture/to have the right to grow up with your kind is important.

  • I don't have a child of my own . I really wanna adopt someday, but after this I have to think about it. All I know kids complete the life of couples. It's good to think that if somebody thinks that it is a trash then sombody will catch it and make it it's treasure. Physical parents are just instruments for our existence but GOD is THE PARENTS OF ALL HUMANKIND. You got the best gifts. No one can explain to you completely because you cannot get that here. Ask God all your questions.

  • I agree with you jan197, Jesus is our only hope and the one to turn to for our questions. What great luck we have an instruction manual The BIBLE. Peace of mind is the best gift ever given, to know we have a father who loves us. That said, this man has a need to find his roots, and I think he should seek his own answers. I can't live without Jesus, but maybe he hasn't yet to figure this out. We need to pray for him so he can find truth, in a spiritual an physical sence. GBU S~

  • He's mine!

  • You are hot.

  • Hi, I'm adopted from Korea as well. 28 years old. I'm doing my thesis around adoption actually too, hence, all my youtubing around adoption. I think from the research I've found, most people who adopt want a family and want a child. They do it out of love, but also out of their own need to have a family. I myself as an adoptee love my life. It's me and my sister and my brother. He's biological, the 2 of us girls are adopted. But I never felt like anything but a child in a family.

  • Hi, I'm a Korean male adoptee as well. I can relate with your story. My adoptive parents divorced when I came to the US. Come to find out my Korean parents divorced and put me up for adoption. The irony is, my adoptive papers stated that i was laid out on the footsteps of the police station. I found out that my birth father is now a police officer.

  • my name is todd. i am a korean adoptee who is starting the journey of finding my birth parents. i have gone thru life with a lot of anger and resentment, towards my birth parents, the kids i grew up with. i was a loner all thru school, and even now, i am a loner. i feel too white to b korean, and too korean to b white. a terrible feeling. i am looking for any advice and info that'll lead me in the right direction. i am lost. i hope to bring closure to both me and my birth parents. thank you.

  • I just looked around stuff and found adoption stories. I thought they were very interesting. Whatever you said in the video made me feel like I was there- kind of Well, one day at church this caucassion couple came with a korean boy (they were adopting him) I thought they were VERY sweet. I felt like they were true parents because they wanted him to know some korean background and they were going to be a part of it too. It truly touched my heart. By the way~ you have a fun personality

  • yo-all feelings are valid!!!

    we shouldn't apologize...

    i like how you preference to AP as AP because that is what they are....

    interested to hear your take on the korean immigrant community in philly, i'm adopted but i have alot of ka friends from philly...

    keep keeping it real....

  • Hello, I am only 13 now, but I just wanted to tell you that it has been my dream to adopt a baby korean boy, also, other children. But, I have always been interested in adoption, and it has become clear to me recently that my purpose in life is to adopt and love children that need my help. I just want to help kids that need a home, and love. Also, thank you for all the videos you have made. -Jeremy-

  • Hello Chairde: Thank you for writing back. I may have over-reacted to you initially; mostly because we have strggled so hard to give our son everything possible to deal with his adoption but he is still adamant on not wanting any part of his Korean heritage, which hurts us deeply. We know how important it is and we know he needs to do this to be a whole person yet he totally refuses to deal with his pain & loss no matter what we've done. we love him so much but its his decision to push it away

  • Is there a thread of racism in adoption? Maybe it is not active racism but more like passive racism. I often wonder why white middle class families go to Korea for babies when there are so many black babies who could be adopted in this country. Don't be angry this is just a thought to discuss.

  • There is no racism in adoption; only love. I am an adoptive parent of a Korean child and i know many other adoptive parent. Your comment was hateful and ignorant. Dont be angry, but this is true. There are MANY reasons a family would go to Korea to adopt a child vs. adopting a black child in this country. Adoption of ANY type has to do with unconditional love and that is all! Shame on you making this a racial issue.

  • My question was not hateful nor ignorant only factual. Still you have not mentioned one reason why a person would seek out a child from Korea rather than a black child in this country. I suspect that Korean adoption by white people fills a void for the parents and at the same time one doesn't have to deal with the black vs white racism here in America. Ripping a child from his culture, language and heritage is not a consideration.

  • I repeat this is not a racial issue, but apparently you don't want to accept this. We most certainly would have / could have loved a black child from this country. What we did not want to deal with from the onset was an open adoption situation, which most are in the US these days. Are you an adoptive parent? If not, what makes you suc a harsh judge of the decisions of others?

  • No I am not an adoptive parent or someone who is adopted. Therefore I have no emotional issues about adoption. That said I believe that the adopted child should be given a chance to learn his native language and culture BEFORE he becomes an adult. If not then only the needs of the adoptive parent are being fully met. Too often adults are clueless about the needs of children.

  • Hi Chairde: you are absolutely correct about an adoptive parent having the responsibility to maintain their child's culture. Most Korean adoptive parents we know have done this, as we have also. We have sent our son to Korean culture day camps and introduced him to everything about his culture. In fact, we have been encouraging our son to do a search for his birth parents so he will have the missing pieces of his past. He is not yet ready to do this.

  • Very good then, I'm impressed. The needs of the child should always come first and that would cover any parent/child relationship. As a retired School Psychologist I've seen so many cases where the emotional needs of the child are not even recognized. You have saved your child a great deal of emotional stress later in life. That is the best gift you could ever give your child.

  • Chairde: in other words: you say that we have given our son the best gift possible by making sure his Korean heritage and culture has been part of his life. Yet this is the one gift our son wants no part of. He was 3 months old when we adopted him. We are a very close family -- he is loved very much -- but to this day he even refuses to view his coming home videos (taken the day he came into our family). To us it was the beginning of a wonderful life;I fear it only reminds him of abandonment

  • Well in his own time he will search out these things. Today is not forever with children they have the ability to go 180 degrees in another direction. All you can do is provide the opportunity and at the end of the day it is his choice what he wants to do. Just keep all that information and videos in a place where he can have access to it all. When he is ready then he will search it out.

  • Thank you for these words of wisdom and encouragement. God works in strange ways and maybe he put you and I on this website because we so desperately wanted to hear that our son will someday be okay and come thru his pain. God bless...

  • bc they were adopted/a product of inter-racial marraiges that did not last/immigrated at a young age/born into a minority grp at a W.world/ etc

    n i just wanted to leave a comment&let u know dat ur not alone,dat ur pain is not urs alone, that ur awesome just the way ur..will be praying for u

    *huGs*

  • hey..we hear ur pain*but good on u for trying to open up/make sense of this thing called life..yes ur very special&awesome, just the way YOU ARE. I was not adopted, but i know what it's like always wondering just who ur&where u fit in,caught between 2cultures..there are millions of ppl(there i say)all over the world who undergo pain&question their ID everyday

  • he is cute

  • hi chris, i'm an adoptive mom after yrs of infertility treatment. u wanted to know how adoptive parents feel about their adopted child... well, i can just tell u tt i love my gal with all my heart & soul. it makes no diff whether or not she came from my tummy cos she's mine/ours & we tk god everyday for her. i had a hard time getting my head around e fact tt she may want 2 locate her birthmom but now i'm ok. jealousy i suppose. when she's older, i'll be right w her if she wants to search for her

  • Hey i go to Drexel too :)

  • asian adult adoptee mini-gathering and film festival this october in waikiki.  email djkimcheelove at yahoo for more info.

    anyong!

  • Takes a lot to put yourself out there like this. Good job man. You'll be an inspiration to many other kids growing up in adopted situations.

    I know many that are adopted and some of my best friends have very similar stories to yours.

    My friend's mom was asked which ones were hers amongst her adopted and biological ones. She answered "They are all mine." I thought it was a very smart response which sum it all up.

  • hi. i think your experience is common. i am a mom of a kad (my little guy is only 3 now) and so i've tried read a lot on the psychology of adoption. from my reading, i believe your feelings are very common. also an adopted roommate i had in college spent a lot of time fantasizing about what her parents were like. i hope so much that my son will get to meet his birthmom. we chose to adopt because our lives felt sort of empty without kids and oh my, our little guy has given us so much more joy.

  • i feel kind of sad for korean-adoptees cause as a korean-born immigrant to the united states, i myself can easily transition to both the korean and american culture easily because i can speak both korean and english but a lot of korean adoptees just dont know korean culture. i know some asian friends who were adopted by whites and i can sense that a lot of them feel like having some need to be "real" asians if you know what i mean.

  • holy shit, chris! you were adopted?! WOW!

  • wesheart, hes not a child, he's an adult. Its really not the adoptive parents job to help us overcome our feelings, its pretty hard to "overcome" adoption, we can live with it, but its not something you just "overcome" its part of us.

    nice video :) I've put it on my site.

  • Wow, you really changed your view on these blog things.

    Going from fat ugly chicks to a serious topic like this.

    I'm more interested now. ;p

  • I am in the process of adopting a child from Taiwan - it's so interesting to hear the thoughts of an adult child that was adopted from overseas. I just hope that my child is happy - and that we can help her to overcome any negative feelings.

  • oh! great video. *thumbs up

  • aww chrisshyy you know we love you. good luck in everything. <3 =] you talk so fast

  • MAH DICK!!! i was down for the original!!

  • KOREA 4 LIFE!!!

  • KOREA 4 LIFE!!!

    D-Miz

  • so, youtube should tell it's people that these comments can only be 500 characters so that people like me won't type away then have to shave shit off later. my comment was way better till it wouldn't let me post due to the limit. it's gay. lub lub lub lub

  • ^_^ am i the best friend!?! when you said "they already had an adopted kid" i was like "... REALLY?! I NEVER KNE.. oh it was Ed. XD" i never felt connected to my family either. talking to wayne wouldn't help because he was and still is in denial about being adopted. it was hard being the only asian for 9 years throughout grade school and then going home to more non-asian faces. can you imagine me and wayne being 7th heaven siblings?! xD. i am glad you are my jo0o :D lub lub lub lub <33333333

  • I saw your link to this video log from facebook group "i am adopted". This is Chelsey. As of right now I'm the most recent post on the wall. I spoke my bio mom last night for the first time. She wanted to keep me but couldn't give me everything that she should. She spent every minute she could with me. placed @ 3 mon. She is a great person. I enjoyed talking to her last night. It was very interesting for her to see how much I was like her even though I was raised with another family.

  • yo chris, this is definitely a nice topic to think about. when i was about 2 and a half years old i think, i was shipped to the US via a very small boat with my sister and it was alright, i like the US. don't really remember korea, although some day i'd like to visit there. great vlog!

  • Hey, I saw your link from another site. I am a birthparent so I guess I can't answer your questions. But I think it's great that you're putting your story out there. I look forward to hearing more about your story!

  • My parents actually are getting into foster care. You would think after 7 kids they had enough, but no they really love kids i guess haha. Yeah but I know i don't understand what its like, but i'm familiar with it