I found a copy of Pocket Ninjas today! I'm going to try to watch the whole thing in one sitting. Maybe on the weekend. I'll have to do some training first.
Btw...Don't you read Japanese books from right to left?
Where I live there was this guy who'd ask kids to put their hand into his pocket and they'd end up grabbing his privates. He was called the 'pocket man'. he was arrested a few years ago. Maybe that's what the pocket ninjas are, I dunno.
Even though the movie is bad tho, Tanya was HHHHOOOOOOOOOOTTTTTTTTT!!! and her voice just makes me melt. Like body melt! body melt! body melt! body melt! body melt! body melt!
@shitcasecinema pocket ninjas was made because it was trying to either rip off or compete with the movie "The three ninjas" which came out around the same time as this movie. Just like "Jurassic Park and Caranosaur". But the three ninjas is Waaaaay better than this movie.
This is one of those movies one should never attempt to watch. It destroys brain cells. The worst thing is that if I saw it 14 years ago, I probably would've liked it.
Oh, and the dodgysouthafricangoon has a role in recent "The Expendables". Quite a career, eh?
Shao Khan is the PIG-hater from 'Cobra' (aka "The Bounty Hunter" from 'The X-Files')! XD That guy with the huge jaw is Robert Z'Dar. His jaw gives Bruce Campbell's chin a run for its money.
Man that shit looked retarded. Fuck I wonder if the kid started playing his gameboy because it obviously doesn't have a game in it. This truly is shit.
You haven't given a one since Body Melt, and you say those are the worst films you've seen. But you rated Bloodrayne a 0.1, so doesn't that count for the worst movie you've seen? And you've seen Troll 2, but you gave it a ten for laughability, which I think is cool. So, answer me honestly, what is the worst film you've ever seen?
@Keeponrockin404 Honestly I can't really say, my friend. Body Melt deserves a 1 rating no doubt. I think Pocket Ninjas is one of the worst films I have ever seen by far and also a film called Camp Blood, which you'll get to see reviewed in a few weeks time ;)
I watched the film from beginning to end last night.
The best that I can deduce about the end is that the narrator is actually Steve, the youngest pocket ninja.
But yeah, the Amy character coming out of the blue makes no sense, nor does her dialogue. Leave who alone? What is lacking explanation? Why did she think he was dead?
Boy do I feel like the saddest bastard actually trying to figure this bullshit out! I should have taken your advice of making a cup of tea and having a wank.
@oliverscott2007 Jesus, mate, you must have been bored to watch this tripe from start to end, I struggled so much with it. I felt embarrassed to be watching it at times.
It wasn't so much boredom as it was an act of defiance to your challenge about watching the film from start to finish. I wanted to prove I had the strength and intestinal fortitude to make it through the whole movie without cheating and jumping ahead.
@shitcasecinema i know you say you couldn't bare to see the whole thing beginning to end. but i did. it might be worth doing only for this reason: it climaxes with awfulness. the complete opposite of a perfect movie. it manages to out-awful itself every 15 minutes. its truly a sight to behold start to finish. no shitty movie i have ever seen has done this. not batman & robin, not the room, not troll 2, not baby geniuses 2. its amazing. it orgasms with awfulness.
Hooooly Shit. Obviously this was made for kids, but it insults the intelligence of a 4 year old. This was painful even to watch in a 10 minute review. How you endured more than 5 minutes of this is beyond belief. I would have said "...OK. Fuck this.", and immediately turned it off. You can watch shit films and review them, believe me, I love your 'show', but this isn't even worthy of calling a film. Don't subject yourself to shit like this that makes Troll 2 look like Shakespeare.
I just did a little research on this movie and learned that it was made by Cine Excel Entertainment, who also made the movie FUTURE WAR (explains a lot, huh?).
Absolutely pathetic, this utter rubbish is not worth a shitcase review. obviously written & directed by a bunch of acid junkies, for a brain damaged audience..
I would say this looks like a ninja film for small children, but I think its more of a ninja film for retarded children. The man main bad guy's (that little Asian child) acting is so terrible, I think he should replace the 'Oh my god guy' in the Shitcase Hall of Shame. Good review
Oh god my jaws ache from seeing this great action comedy. That boss kid looks familiar - maybe it was that kid from the golden child. Anyway his fight training is really better than what richard harrison would put together. Great scenes you have shown - really is a funny, amazing and inspiring film. Won an oscar I heard. Don't understand why people think it is rubbish - maybe just me.
i've never been lost for words after watching one of your reviews but MY GOD, this is... i can' think of any word that could describe the shiteness of it. "yeah, i loved batman" that line is stealer :D very accurate and fair review, shitcase. see you next time 10/10
@shitcasecinema Look up the following. Silent night Deadly night 2 (Garbage day isnt the only good line by a long shot), Deadly Prey, Birdemic, Aerobicide and Turkish star wars
I found a copy of Pocket Ninjas today! I'm going to try to watch the whole thing in one sitting. Maybe on the weekend. I'll have to do some training first.
Btw...Don't you read Japanese books from right to left?
pootie4321 3 months ago
the South African is played by Gary Daniels who was born in London, England.
eutue 6 months ago
Where I live there was this guy who'd ask kids to put their hand into his pocket and they'd end up grabbing his privates. He was called the 'pocket man'. he was arrested a few years ago. Maybe that's what the pocket ninjas are, I dunno.
topperheartramada 7 months ago
Ah mate, I'm a day off. But, happy 1 year anniversary!
'I hate cookies!'
Brilliance!
oliverscott2007 10 months ago
pocket ninjas is terrible movie...if it doesn't want to make you kill yourself when watching it you have NO soul.
Pretty sure I watched the whole thing right here on youtube.
zeejustin6 10 months ago
7:21 - gameboy does not have a cartrige!
Fjodin 1 year ago
@Fjodin lol i noticed that as well must have lost it
cdbils001 11 months ago
They didn't show them climbing up the rope because obviously none of them have the upper body strength to do it.
pretorious700 1 year ago
Does the guy at 0:53. take botox injections in his chin?
cockneyrobin 1 year ago
Gameboy has no game.... 7:18
evobeast 1 year ago 7
@evobeast
Well, you do not need a gamecartridge if you're on meth, like this kid XD
000Mariat000 1 year ago
only good thing about this movie is robert z´dar´s chin
pyro80 1 year ago
Even though the movie is bad tho, Tanya was HHHHOOOOOOOOOOTTTTTTTTT!!! and her voice just makes me melt. Like body melt! body melt! body melt! body melt! body melt! body melt!
animebeerandcake 1 year ago
@shitcasecinema pocket ninjas was made because it was trying to either rip off or compete with the movie "The three ninjas" which came out around the same time as this movie. Just like "Jurassic Park and Caranosaur". But the three ninjas is Waaaaay better than this movie.
animebeerandcake 1 year ago
@animebeerandcake lolol just because this movie is extremly shitty, 3 ninjas is just shitty
Wayavas1337 1 year ago
@Wayavas1337 3 ninjas was watchable, this isn't.......i tried.
animebeerandcake 1 year ago
Khobra Khan was also the name of a Masters of the Universe figure.
VitoPossilipo 1 year ago
@VitoPossilipo You're right there, well spotted.
shitcasecinema 1 year ago
@shitcasecinema Thanks.
VitoPossilipo 1 year ago
If the comic really would be Japanase it had to be scrolled the other way round.
VitoPossilipo 1 year ago
You should watch Munchie Strikes Back.
Alan27Jorn 1 year ago
This is one of those movies one should never attempt to watch. It destroys brain cells. The worst thing is that if I saw it 14 years ago, I probably would've liked it.
Oh, and the dodgysouthafricangoon has a role in recent "The Expendables". Quite a career, eh?
AnotherWhiskey 1 year ago
pocket ninjas is the worst movie i have ever seen
bobbybenjamin 1 year ago
Shao Khan is the PIG-hater from 'Cobra' (aka "The Bounty Hunter" from 'The X-Files')! XD That guy with the huge jaw is Robert Z'Dar. His jaw gives Bruce Campbell's chin a run for its money.
\8-P
IggyHazard 1 year ago
Man that shit looked retarded. Fuck I wonder if the kid started playing his gameboy because it obviously doesn't have a game in it. This truly is shit.
solraymond 1 year ago
You haven't given a one since Body Melt, and you say those are the worst films you've seen. But you rated Bloodrayne a 0.1, so doesn't that count for the worst movie you've seen? And you've seen Troll 2, but you gave it a ten for laughability, which I think is cool. So, answer me honestly, what is the worst film you've ever seen?
Keeponrockin404 1 year ago
@Keeponrockin404 Honestly I can't really say, my friend. Body Melt deserves a 1 rating no doubt. I think Pocket Ninjas is one of the worst films I have ever seen by far and also a film called Camp Blood, which you'll get to see reviewed in a few weeks time ;)
shitcasecinema 1 year ago
I watched the film from beginning to end last night.
The best that I can deduce about the end is that the narrator is actually Steve, the youngest pocket ninja.
But yeah, the Amy character coming out of the blue makes no sense, nor does her dialogue. Leave who alone? What is lacking explanation? Why did she think he was dead?
Boy do I feel like the saddest bastard actually trying to figure this bullshit out! I should have taken your advice of making a cup of tea and having a wank.
oliverscott2007 1 year ago 5
@oliverscott2007 Jesus, mate, you must have been bored to watch this tripe from start to end, I struggled so much with it. I felt embarrassed to be watching it at times.
shitcasecinema 1 year ago
@shitcasecinema
It wasn't so much boredom as it was an act of defiance to your challenge about watching the film from start to finish. I wanted to prove I had the strength and intestinal fortitude to make it through the whole movie without cheating and jumping ahead.
oliverscott2007 1 year ago
@shitcasecinema i know you say you couldn't bare to see the whole thing beginning to end. but i did. it might be worth doing only for this reason: it climaxes with awfulness. the complete opposite of a perfect movie. it manages to out-awful itself every 15 minutes. its truly a sight to behold start to finish. no shitty movie i have ever seen has done this. not batman & robin, not the room, not troll 2, not baby geniuses 2. its amazing. it orgasms with awfulness.
bobbybenjamin 1 year ago
@shitcasecinema Amazing, indeed, maybe i'm going to watch this movie;) looks great....
Really enjoyed the review [and all the other ones] you ever heard of The Stink of Flesh? Another great movie...
velocirapteryx24 3 months ago
I'm guessing smut like this would bring Surf Ninjas closer to an Academy Award nominee.
k2blue7 1 year ago
Just when you thought i couldnt get any worse. Pocket ninjas appears. wow was any money spent making this shit? the review was good though.
sergiovictoir 1 year ago
8:15 you meant Spider Man.
RAQ665 1 year ago
@RAQ665 No, I meant Batman. Sarcasm :)
shitcasecinema 1 year ago
...Horrible film! Felt pretty uncomfortable trying to even watch this review!
vicarious23 1 year ago
Hahaha! I think we have a winner!
luxenfux 1 year ago 2
Omg this looks so so bad....
TomKW89 1 year ago
Hooooly Shit. Obviously this was made for kids, but it insults the intelligence of a 4 year old. This was painful even to watch in a 10 minute review. How you endured more than 5 minutes of this is beyond belief. I would have said "...OK. Fuck this.", and immediately turned it off. You can watch shit films and review them, believe me, I love your 'show', but this isn't even worthy of calling a film. Don't subject yourself to shit like this that makes Troll 2 look like Shakespeare.
GunHed17 1 year ago
I just did a little research on this movie and learned that it was made by Cine Excel Entertainment, who also made the movie FUTURE WAR (explains a lot, huh?).
johnnyhorror92182 1 year ago
Absolutely pathetic, this utter rubbish is not worth a shitcase review. obviously written & directed by a bunch of acid junkies, for a brain damaged audience..
MadMark2006 1 year ago
Hmmmm, more like karate wannabes, not ninjutsu..!
shinobirick09 1 year ago
Ahahaha.... epic review. Did anyone else notice that the Gameboy he took out and started playing had NO CARTRIDGE in it?
mk2k4 1 year ago 2
I would say this looks like a ninja film for small children, but I think its more of a ninja film for retarded children. The man main bad guy's (that little Asian child) acting is so terrible, I think he should replace the 'Oh my god guy' in the Shitcase Hall of Shame. Good review
mintyspace 1 year ago
child actors are the kiss of death to any movie
howthefagworks 1 year ago
1out of ten seems overated
ZigZagRunner 1 year ago
Oh god my jaws ache from seeing this great action comedy. That boss kid looks familiar - maybe it was that kid from the golden child. Anyway his fight training is really better than what richard harrison would put together. Great scenes you have shown - really is a funny, amazing and inspiring film. Won an oscar I heard. Don't understand why people think it is rubbish - maybe just me.
iwonwalker1285 1 year ago
OMFG i can't belive you reviewd this! I was atually just watching this online a minute ago AND IT'S SHIT! Thnx for reviewing I hate this movie.
ValkiryeMax 1 year ago
Lol, Maniac Cop. Seiously Robert Z'Dar should have killed his agent for this.
JDPVJE 1 year ago
i accept your challenge of seeing this movie all the way through
TheSteampunkkid00079 1 year ago
Wow...yeah, I think this movie takes the cake--it definitely looks like the worst movie you've reviewed so far!
procterandgambooble 1 year ago
This makes 3 Ninjas: High Noon at Mega Mountain look good
Even your review of American Ninja made it look more entertaining
889654 1 year ago
this one was too shit to make fun of. be a little more selective there.
fuzzynippleman 1 year ago
i've never been lost for words after watching one of your reviews but MY GOD, this is... i can' think of any word that could describe the shiteness of it. "yeah, i loved batman" that line is stealer :D very accurate and fair review, shitcase. see you next time 10/10
arprodexec 1 year ago
What the fuck was that? Maybe they can do a crossover pokemon vs pocket ninjas... What the rich was that??
AximusPrime81 1 year ago
christ, where'd you find this pile of shit? great review. in stitches the whole time. i'm actually tempted to watched this thing.
paddilac1984 1 year ago
1. call my "your master" because I saw the movie from start to finish
2. that movie is GOD AWFUL but I saw worst
3. now if you excuse me but I have "Plaguers" to see
XxxElPresidentexxX 1 year ago
Congrtats John, you've done the seemingly impossible and found a film that looks worse than 3 ninjas! 10/10 for the review, 0/10 for the film.
KJA1985 1 year ago
how could you even survive 5 minutes of this film?
Avzzor 1 year ago
Keeps getting stuck at 7:48 for me. Tried multiple browsers. I guess I'll never know how this gem ends.
Anrkist713 1 year ago
Wow...just...wow
Atripple 1 year ago
What is this, I don't even...
RainbowReelcinema 1 year ago
That GameBoy had not cartridge in it! How crap! Zero out of ten.
leptonsoup337 1 year ago
I'm speechless by how bad that looked =O
EphemeralShadow 1 year ago
Jeezus Christ! This movie makes "Surf Ninja's" look like "Sister Street Fighter".
johnnyhorror92182 1 year ago
I like the new intro. Mainly because the god that is Ramirez appears.
denton908 1 year ago
at 7:20 why was there no game in the Game boy?
Doperwtje81 1 year ago
1/10? whats the 1 for?
pathofoblivion 1 year ago
MAybe the title is Poker Ninjas?? LOL the bad-guy-kid acting is awesome though XD
alcibiade666 1 year ago
Wow....that was BAAAAD!
SuperLowlander 1 year ago
Ouch 1/10 it can't be that shit...right...?
vipersnake2895 1 year ago
@vipersnake2895 It IS that bad,seriously.
shitcasecinema 1 year ago
@shitcasecinema Look up the following. Silent night Deadly night 2 (Garbage day isnt the only good line by a long shot), Deadly Prey, Birdemic, Aerobicide and Turkish star wars
ichater 1 year ago
BTW, last night i had a dream about SCC seriously!...all i remmember it was that You got a new song for Your show...LOL
wieprz 1 year ago
FIRST!
wieprz 1 year ago