The Room - Tommy Wiseau quotes

[TheMoazeem]

Don't touch me motherfucker

[Ghafmocro]

HAHAHAHA Transcribe audio is hella fun xD Docter lee and i will help youXD! at 2:03

[ForTommyWiseau]

Just what I needed. "Good Thinking"

[ymistillavirgin]

out a state baaaaank

[homersimps1]

I've never seen anyone destroy a room so nonchalantly

[Rojas33589]

"I don't drink you know that" . . . 2 seconds later . . . 'I'm tired, I'm wasted, I love you darling!"-Tommy Wiseu

[Ccarus007]

In a few minutes bitch....

[OmgItsDanielTbh]

2:06 - BOOB PUSH

[MrJustjimmy]

He also looks like Bret Hart.

[MrJustjimmy]

I've never laughed so much!

[dubitataugustinus]

There is SO much wisdom in the words of Wiseau... so much.

[dewness997]

Oh hai Mark.

[DomRHH]

a human bean.

[BobButtins]

What's bubbering you, Mark?

[HareHareSailorFuku]

Every time I see anything related to this movie, I just think "STOP TALKING!"

[seanfenrir]

he probably did hit Lisa the way hes pushing her.

[KilobyteBrain]

I love that this is basically a condensed version of the movie.

[IggyHazard]

If Tommy's character is a banker, how is he allowed to wear his hair like that?

[xXDrOPdEAdJo3yXx]

1:35 As a person as a human bean!

[AwesomeCoasters]

''Hai''

Whatever it means, I will from now on say it to every lady I meet.

[NanaNarcotic]

HAHAHAHAH I watched the film like 3 times and it never gets old.

[ursie1986]

i love that his most natural lines are when he is telling the shrink friend about how he met lisa. he just goes into egotistical tommy wiseau mode and not egotistical tommy wiseau acting mode for a change

.

[jlogano20]

turn on transcribe audio and enjoy the hilarity

[dirtbiker0232]

Fucking alien cunt

[Magichunter321]

im so happy i have you as my bestfriend, and i love lisa so much

[BlotRorschach]

6:05 BERRRRRRRRRRAGAGHLHGLHG

[Byron10301]

Holy shit ... I know this wasn't meant to be a comedy ... but that just makes it more of a brilliant comedy! it's like Borat!

[MrMushroom123]

6:03

reminds me of me in the morning, when i get myself ready for the day.

[BobButtins]

What's bubbering you, Mark?

[acicon]

This man is a genius

[MrBuppo]

I now understand the entire plot of the movie, just by watching this. XD

[hockeywarrior]

So in other words, everything he says in the movie are the best quotes lol.

[BlackHeartDarkSoul]

anything for my princeeeeeeess hahahahaha...

[silentninjagr]

herman li had a baby with swartzenager

[Zazumaki]

I'LL KILL YOU YOU BASTUR!

[jakeisgreat]

A HUMAN BEAN!!! LMAO!

[therandomchit]

I have a serious problem with Lisa... uhm... I don't think she's faithful to me, in FUCK I know she isn't.

[MrsSmith1104]

@therandomchit In FACT, I know she isn't.....

IJS...

[aylmer666]

no "Less go eat, huuuuh..."? That's the most popular one around my office. Someone always manages to throw it in prior to lunch.

[ErikAllenAwake]

Someone needs to invent time travel so we can get Tommy Wiseau as the leading man in an Ed Wood film.

[MostDope401]

I love him.... but honestly, worst actor ever hahaha

[vivifan57]

Press 4 for dont worry about it and Press 3 for worry about it

[vivifan57]

This movie is sooo bad it's good XD

[zippydude12345]

6:05 bleringhalblrgablragh

[LuiTheCrazy]

Cheep cheep cheep cheep cheep CHEEEEEP!

[Khanin2718]

@nicholasjames100

haha, great :D

Random guy: "What's your favorite dinosaur?"

Tommy Wiseau: "That's a very personal question. I'm afraid I cannot answer it like that."

I bow to that man.

[MrCiNiC]

DUR, you forgot, "IN A MINUTE, BITCH!"?????

[bioofwarheros]

I'm tired I'm wasted I love you darling!

[Khanin2718]

I saw him last night announcing the film. It is fascinating that his mannerisms seem to reflect his mannerisms in the film exactly^^

[nicholasjames100]

@Khanin2718 woo! me too!!

[akaast]

I dont have a friend in the wuruld.

[troubl3somez]

he seems like a retard

[rumrunner777]

this is so fukken lulzy its unbweevable.

[RiskuBusiness]

0:51 Hahaha

[lachasse]

I gave 2 minutes of my life to watch this crap

[turtlefanrecords]

what did he throw at 5:34? it's too dark to see.

[Tubyubber]

@turtlefanrecords looks like the tape recorder or something?

[ShinyLucarioFTW]

I GAVE YOU SEVEN YEARS OF MY LIIIiiiife..

[RJLSpartan309]

What accent is that? Is he from Skyrim?!

[miro1200]

Voice acting: Level beanutbubber.

[TheLucasleddy]

Where the hell is this guy even from?

[quailgirl818]

Sign of how bizarre Tommy Wisseau is: I spent the first minute or so trying to decide if this really a video of him or a spoof video with someone dressed up as him. I still wouldn't be surprised to find out it wasn't really him.

[zachellis0]

Transcribe audio <3

[Sicologikal]

0:41 - 0:48 Had me on the floor!

"I did naaaht!"

[TheEclipsist]

I keep clicking 4:55 to hear him say "CHEEP" and then slap Mark in the face. it's surprisingly entertaining.

[SuprizedMF17]

The whole movie, in 6 minutes. haha

[omoniatisa]

I DID NOT HIT HER ITS NOT TRUE ITS BULLSHIT I DID NOT HIT HER I DID NAHHHT !

[vivifan57]

As a human bean WTF!?

[Jcolinsol]

Oh, you left out Tommy's delightful anecdote about the bay to breakers, about how the barbeque chicken was delicious rice.

[Jcolinsol]

I like the tense rooftop scene between Johnny and Mark, because it makes me pictures the two of them back in acting class, before they attained stardom together.

[LoneBong]

Also, @ 6:13 it looks like Tommy is making a salsa dance move

[LoneBong]

I GAVE YOU SEVEN YEARS OF MY life

[hamlinfilm]

this is funny shit i cryed laughing

[tes4o]

NO FORGET IT I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER

[tes4o]

NO FORGET IT I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER

[Bumblkillface]

So he never hit her, he just shoved her down whenever she tried to stand up

[Bamafiend2010]

Any Type O Negative fans here? Haha

[Texthewolf]

AS A HUMAN BEAN

[TanoBrati]

Was his voice was dubbed over?

[ymistillavirgin]

@TanoBrati its to provoke the audience, say mr wisseu from an interview

[JoeLaTurkeyIII]

5:12

How could you JEW this to me?!

[optimystic9]

@2:19 YOURA LIYA ID NEDA HIT CHU

[koroconnell]

I DID NOT HIT HER!!! ididnot Oh hi Mark.

[cassmi87]

Is it just me or is his face gradually deforming as the video progresses? :O

[vivifan57]

6:04 LMFAO sounds like a mix between the hulk and king kong

[LixoOrganicovlog]

DO YOU UNDERSTAND LIFE??!?!?

[Maddiox3]

You Forgot "I Brake Effree Boan En Yoor Body"

[Maddiox3]

I hate YMCA too, Tommy.... 3:09

[allUneedISLove420]

Hahaha what a shtory mark!!

[ihatencgo]

3:00 - 3:40 a glimmer of hope! 3:40 nah, he's determined

[bjorkman88]

Hugh is his best friend.

[freshsmiles305]

"anything for my princessss" and " I did not hit her, it's bullshit I did not hit her. I. did. not......Oh hi mark" hahaha I need to go google what air is

[nooboftheforest]

eggs-pert

[indiesk8r1]

he's the laziest room destroyer ever.

[indiesk8r1]

You betrayed me. You not good. You... You just a chicken! Cheep cheep cheep cheep cheep cheep!

[yoonsunlee]

... because it was an out of state checkANYWAY...

[lolbarrk]

Well the interesting part is that she paid for dinner

[Syatek2020]

why is the voice off?

[terrorfestival]

@Syatek2020 Dubbed.

[andymac6263]

the lightest tele in the world :)

[KingStatham]

Hit 7 for Tommy's greatest face ever.

[BritishSexComedy]

What's bubbering you Mark?

[KingStatham]

I LUFF YEW DAURHLING

[JoyceJennings]

I did not hit her!

I did naaaaht.

[TheTrueFranchise]

doan'dt tawch mi mudder faaawkerd

[TheMrSONIC4]

What's buvvering you, Mark?

[jermin8tor]

Shit!...Alright?

[xLiiLxDANNiix]

"You know better, right? Why!?" "Sorry!"

"Better weitzman slide consignee"

[KingStatham]

@xLiiLxDANNiix YOU KNOW BETTUH DENNY YEW ALMOST GOT KILL

[hyenapeptic]

"How did you meet Lisa? You never told us" "That's a very interesting story Mark"

[TheAwesomeBomb]

very interesting story



[qotsadet]

who else sees christopher walken' s "the continental" in this guy?. f-ing funny.

[AmduFrales93]

tommy wiseau = worst voice, worst face, worst acting abilities, worst directing abilities, worst at explaining things, worst production value, worst casting, worst script writing, worst insults, & worst conversation continuity I've ever seen. Sure made me laugh though, can anyone top this??? Because I want to see it!

[GeezernortProduction]

I DID NOT HIT HER! Ohhimark!

[qualestorm2112]

Dont touch me MUDDER FUCKUR!

[kuribayashi84]

"Why are you so hysterical??"

You know, that is one of only two legitimate questions in this Movie.

[ambskater97]

@kuribayashi84 The other being "What are these characters doing here?"

[psycho642]

Oh high Youtube

[AbStar921]

1:49 You can read about it in my new book, 'The Tao of Johnny'. Is real good, hah?

[theEnvywaldorf]

Do you understand life? Do you?

[FireWalkWithMe91]

gurr trubba guess

[Klubretep89]

You forgot the very first quote. "HAI BABE."

[Whatyamightcallit]

no wonder this guy gets his own series on machinima, his acting is so shit, its funny xD

[vtc31]

1:36

"As a human bean."

Bean.

[Zinlol]

"I did NAAAUT."

[kingcainjr]

leave your stupid comments in your pocket.

[jkwaffle]

1:04 Whats... Buttering you mark? :O

[starclassic161]

Oh hai doggy!

[bruvcuzfam]

Tommy looks like he's made of wax lol

[EASTWICKgames]

ha ha ha, what a story mark.

that should be the new "cool story bro" XD

[faganator]

5:47 GLASS FRUIT WIN!

[spaske26]

4:08 What are you chewing?

[NightshadeDarkrai]

What in the unholy hell did I just watch...?

[PorkchopCupcake]

@NightshadeDarkrai

You're overwhelmed. It's understandable. It happens to everybody when they witness scenes from the best comedy of all time.

[HoopsAndDinoMan]

It seems to me like you lay EGGS, bird-Mark!

[imortal22]

Do you undestell live?

[doggod106]

Why are his eyes always closed.

[billa107]

Can anyone explain why it's called The Room? 

[Doomed2Hell]

@billa107 No. Nobody can.

[MuffinOfFun]

@billa107

Because there's a room involved. The room is so mysterious the movie never gives an explanation.

[naywin2495]

best story i've ever heard starting at 3:02

[dhyphenBils]

IM SO HAPPY I HAVE YOU AS MY BESTFRIEND. andilovelisasomuch

[DuchessAliana]

Denny is a human bean!!

[mpoke10]

0:27



[mpoke10]

0:29



[imortal22]

Don torch mui mudder fugger,, geddowd

[mpoke10]

1:03 Whats bobbering you mark?

0:27 Im tired im wasted i love you darling.

5:45 Starts throwing things on the ground.

5:50 You betrayed me you're not good you you just a chicken CHEEP CHEEP CHEEEEP

CHEEEEP CHEEP CHEEP!

5:01 Its not over everyone betrayed me im fed up with this world!

1:48 If a lot of people loved each other the world would be a better place

2:21 YOU ARE TEARING ME APART LISA!!!

[mpoke10]

1:03 Whats bobering you mark?

[PorkchopCupcake]

The Room is a movie that helps put the art cinema into a realistic perspective. Because without movies as good as The Room, you wouldn't know when to identify all those other crappy movies by those hacks Spielberg, Cameron, Michael Bay, Tarantino, etc. So, be thankful somebody took the time to expose you to real cinema.

[ElnAlter]

@PorkchopCupcake You use irony to call Michael Bay a good director in so many words. Bay is horrible director and shouldn't be mentioned in the same sentence as Tarantino. He's just a high budget Uwe Boll.

[PorkchopCupcake]

@ElnAlter

Look, it's a generalization of successful directors. Michael Bay is without a doubt a successful director, who's films won't win any critic's circle jerk awards, but his films are a part of the re-emergence of 3-D cinema in a major way. For every arm-chair movie critic who yells "Michael Bay sucks" from behind a keyboard, there are millions more gladly parting with their money to be entertained by his films.

[ElnAlter]

@PorkchopCupcake D-war was a popular movie. Just because a movie is popular doesn't make it or it's director righteous. It's funny to see people like you indicate ticket sales as quality. Besides, The Room was successful if for a different reason so your irony is moot.

[PorkchopCupcake]

@ElnAlter

You're tearing me apart ElnAlter!

[mpoke10]

1:34



[synnyswhore]

I never hit you...HOW DURR YOU TALK TO ME LIKE DAT! *push*

[thejoesyndrome]

PERFECT ENDING LMAO

[uiruu]

Where is his accent from!?

[AmduFrales93]

@uiruu a small town in austria where the little boys are clubbed repeatedly until they reach the age of 27

[2Seatroll2]

2:44 this guy is trying not to laugh