Today Now! Interviews The 5-Year-Old Screenwriter Of "Fast Five"

[MattS3NTM]

that kid is so adorable!!!! LoL

[gredangeo]

They're going to have to use a fetus to make a parody of Michael Bay properly. :)

[robotpanda77]

HA-HAH!

[gorgeousaur]

I'd watch a Fast and Furious movie if it were actually written by a 5-year old.

[houchi69]

@gorgeousaur they are. :-P

[gorgeousaur]

@houchi69 They would be entertaining if that were true.

[normalpsychology]

I KNOW WHERE I'LL BE EVERY SUMMER. This shit is a little bit too genius sometimes... wow.

[SeaShellNecklaceBrah]

THAT KID LOOKS LIKE MUGI FROM K-ON!!!

[quidnick]

Funny parody though Mr. Morgan actually just turned 3.

[MrWsad]

Maxim praised for its how to fuck fat chicks issue (right in the end at the bottom of the screen) XD

[general2109]

Man Jim was funny in this one ;P "WOAH, no spoilers, no spoilers!"

[bluewhale18]

The movie was so bad, that even a 5 yr old could write it

I GET IT!!!!

[skulleton]

@bluewhale18

ONLY a 5 year old (or someone with the mental output of a 5 year old) could make fast five.

[HSAdestroy]

This is so funny!

[2GummyBearBlues]

But she only had to take a bath LOL

[PaulSebert]

That kid was much better than guys that did Tokyo Drift.

[Shargrailar]

All armchair critics should gargle anthrax.

[Earthivore]

No spoilers! No spoilers! LMFAO xD

[thesillyshorts]

Look at the lower caption at 1:44 "Newt Gingrich plans to have sex in a graveyard." :)

[d0md0mt0mt0m]

I liked Wanted.... :(

[greenchef6]

Hahaha it's so true. What a fucking joke that movie was.

[undertow1985]

tracy gill is so sexy

[happycburger2]

Reupload anyone?

[phenomenalclassic93]

Chris would be an amazing guest on Actor's Studio. it wouldnt be an honor for chris but an honor for james lipton to be in the presence of a screen writing prodigy

[Rawr8987]

He is so cute it hurts.

[Tomthestarhartnell]

Newt Gingrich plans on having sex in a graveyard!

[renzord2]

This is the same kid who was behind "The Expendables"! Oh wait.. No, that was Sylvester Stallone.

[whyamibzsdmhalt]

Kids theese days ^_^

[Aerba54]

Fail and the Furious?

[Penguinz13989]

@Aerba54 no.

[TheRealPetChicken]

hilarious!

[h82bu223]

american shows r so gay and stupid fuckin brainwashers

[Mossgate97]

@h82bu223 You realize your a fucking retard right?

[h82bu223]

@Mossgate97 lmaoo eat a dick ya cunt ....... oviously i didnt no its a showw cockhead

[Mossgate97]

@h82bu223 Lrn2grmmer

[h82bu223]

@Mossgate97 do you think i give a fuck mate its youtube

[cyanmanta]

As long as there are 13-year-old boys with disposable income, there will always be Fast and the Furious, American Pie, and Final Destination sequels.

[StopTheMusicThen]

So he wrote the first one at age 1?

[theOrIginalbk]

is it just me or is Tracy a bit of a milf

[lukeiamyourfaja]

this answers many questions about hollywood,

[Savoree790]

600 more fast and furious!!! Muhahaha!!!!

[EWillard44]

I wanna here about the lady who thinks it's 1958!

[973JJJ]

I really can't stand these kids in the comments complaining about screenwritng, as if the knew anything about movies at all. It's funny how they all criticize it so they can feel like cultured movie intelectuals. Kids these days...

[PainInTheAssInternet]

@973JJJ

Even when I was 12 I could tell that hollywood movies were generally shit, especially within the realms of comedy and romance (And don't you dare mix the two). When a kid that age states that your movie has nothing to offer, you should feel ashamed. Also, who deemed William Shatner as a capable actor?

[aturtlenamedfee]

@973JJJ Well i'll complain for the simple fact that it isn't racing anymore. They just went so off the main story it's crazy, i remember when they used to race...

[hgva1]

Did anyone see the grudge kid in 0:44-0:45??

[fabaum22]

I bet a 5 years old was responsible for the cars too. The modifications, especially.

As a car enthusiast, I must say that this sort of thing is to me what Hip Hop must be to Regina Spektor.

[atemikage]

600

[jazz4]

This is how they're hocking a terrible franchise?

[graveey]

wot a ridiculous marketing ploy

[chltmdwp]

he is so cute!

[unopinionated]

is this the funniest shit I have ever seen?

[MrDeadmanDT]

So much truth to it.

[MercedesCars454]

If this is true, then the Transformer(s) screenwriters must be giraffes of alligators.

[wesrcravenfan12]

1:14 like a cop

[Gasssolo]

No spoilers, no spoilers!



[Yepimdatguy]

Whoever the writers are for Today Now are friggin brilliant. Ever heard the phrase "This could have been written by a five year old?" XD They make me laugh so much.

[schwiiZZZ]

no spoilers lol

[edkaska]

ik its a joke though but how is a five year old around 10 years of writing movies lol

[gregorcollins]

Brilliant commentary on the brainlessness of some of the stuff out there - but brainlessness sells!

[alternitivepat]

ooh fun new ways to exit your home!

[Offensiveguard65]

lmao "no spoilers no spoilers"

[Iamjohntheone]

This is one of the best things ever! Fact...

[HellFrode]

Sory, i can't believe this is true.

[Madizzle90]

@HellFrode I'm sorry

[MrDeadmanDT]

@HellFrode Because Fast Five's script is above that of a five year old? Regardless, I hope your not one of the many asshats that think the Onion is a source of real news.

[USA4July1776]

LOL!

[B0hnj3]

This is clearly fake, that kid was far too old and mature to write such a terrible movie.

[honorabili]

You might think it's Satire but it's NOT.

[Nduengo]

TheOnion never fails me!! lol! If the kid was acting, he's got a bright future ahead of him!

[YousefALBuraq]

I DO NOT KNOW HOW THE FUCK THOSE PEOPLE DISLIKE THE VIDEO HE IS VERY CUTE

[ThorBarstad]

Hahaha!

[MysteryKid500]

@hellfrode this is not a fake it is very real and the kid word down stuff and they edited it so it is true

[HellFrode]

I can not believe that, 4 - 5 years old kid could have written such a good manuscript. This is a fake.

[LiveLoveLife8592]

@HellFrode No duh...

[somekidonfire]

Nap Time xD

[dorkman0]

The final movie will be called "Fast & The Furious: 600 mph"

[SmallpoxRot]

The male interviewer is hilarious! "No spoilers!"

[MonsieurRondu]

what? since when did the onion do real interviews

[kaza12345678]

@MonsieurRondu maybe it was onion bubs

[ThreeSeventyFive]

That movie sucked ass.

[imabo5s]

Are you SURE the onion is just satire, I'm 99% sure this is real.

[SeverinThirteen]

hahahha 600 sequels of fast and furious hahaha

[Mikashmak]

i hope they don't really let him watch those movies

[Mikashmak]

is this for real?

[NotIkeman]

@Mikashmak Yes. Look at the credits at the end of the movie it says his name.

[Allen75000]

Fast Five... I thought it was going to be about racing but nooooo.

[MrSiegebreaker13]

'NO SPOILERS NO SPOILERS!" BAHAHAHAHA!!!

[IRKuyer]

I thought it was written by a group of 16 year olds. A five year old child can't write a movie like a Fast Five, he has too much imagination for it. Now maybe a 16 year old high schooler or a call of duty obsessed pre-teen, but a five year old directing a perfect depiction of the dumbing down of American movie goers? I'm not buying it. It takes a real dumbshit to make a movie like Fast Five and Transformers.

[MrBrilliantChaos]

Transformers was decent movie, fast five though....

[Steven4152]

@IRKuyer I'm a 16 year old obsessed with call of duty and I take offense to your comment.

[MrMuttn]

@Steven4152 No he is deffinetly right COD is for dumbasses.

[Cdubzhappy]

@IRKuyer *movies

[coopdeville777]

@IRKuyer but how do the Transformer movies get worse and worse with each installment? Don't get me wrong I watch the movies but come on, seriously, are they making them worse on purpose. Are they having all night brainstorm sessions on how to write a story that sucks more then the previous pile of suck they came up with?

[SeCONdagenda1]

@IRKuyer And Inception,

FACE IT, IT WAS OVERRATED PSYCHOBABBLE WITH COOL EXPLOSIONS AND BIG NAMES.

[SeCONdagenda1]

@SeCONdagenda1 ...WITH A COOL TRAILER

[TheBeBeCaCa]

@SeCONdagenda1 You think inception is overrated? By your low level vocabulary and your somewhat inarticulate writing, I can tell you merely didn't understand it... the truth is your simply hurt because you can't comprehend any of this, quote "psychobabble."

[SeCONdagenda1]

@TheBeBeCaCa Yes, I didn't understand it because it was completely inane to an exoteric audience and frankly not a weird enough representation of the subconscious dream scape. You'll find South Park agrees with me. Speaking of low level vocabulary, your name has the word "ca ca" in it. Probably not an English major are you, jackass?

[TheBeBeCaCa]

@SeCONdagenda1 Well that may be your opinion (AND LOL AT MY NAME), but what do you mean by exoteric audience? That means general public. I find that most of the people I meet end up thinking that Inception is a great movie. And no, I'm not an English major. I'm still in middle school, actually.

Oh I like south park too ;)

[SeCONdagenda1]

@TheBeBeCaCa Knew you weren't an adult, now I'm sorry for calling you a jackass, I'm 15, I read a primer on Jungian psyche and thought Inception made no sense, not even as good a sci fi. nuff said.

[VelaToNorma7]

@TheBeBeCaCa You don't know the difference between "your" and "you're" yet you tell someone else they can't speak efficiently?

[TheBeBeCaCa]

@VelaToNorma7 I think you need to check again. I used it correctly in all of my comments... oh wow Velo... this must be so embarrassing.

[donnk]

@SeCONdagenda1

oh no, no..you DONT hate on Nolan....you want overrated piece of shit with explosions and big names? try Avatar / Transformers

[edvhou812]

@donnk Avatar was pretty good. Transformers was made by an ass putz. The Fast and Furious franchise was made by a 5-year-old.

[donnk]

@edvhou812

well avatar has great graphics..but story 3/10

its space pocahontas

[VerendumGames]

@donnk Pocahontas, in turn, was more of an animated version of "Dances With Wolves," rather than an adaptation of the admittedly boring story of Pocahontas and John Smith.

[bollocks2who]

I THOUGHT I WAS DONE WITH THIS??!! LMAO!

[hhaaffmmeyer]

this made me want to watch the movie

[meestamo]

"Is there a chance we're gonna see more fast and the furious sequels? Yeah. Well how many? 600!" lol i laughed soo hard! :L

[ThisisJamesman]

@meestamo man & now we're onto fast six *sighs*

[meestamo]

@ThisisJamesman What the hell are you on about? :L

[locojohnston]

can i take off my shoes now?

[mattigus]

I have a friend who was convinced this was real.

[iAstro129]

"No spoilers, please!"

[TheGuitarman1099]

" can I take off my shoes now?"

[WiiDudeIV]

Haha... I laughed so hard at the part where they showed Vin Diesel playing cars with the 5 year old and then the part where he said they'd make 600 movies...

[bryleemck]

"She seed a bullet, an' the bullet went poof around her face, but she din't die, only had to take a bath."

These are the only things anyone remembers about that movie, so as far as I can tell, he probably did write it.

[ReploideY]

sis haundred fast & furious!? wow!

[ReploideY]

@OthoDaFe Me too!

[VirtuesPenumbra]

No wonder the dialogue was so confusing! This kid kept switching crayons while he was writing the lines, so the actors were probably speaking lines that were meant for other characters.

If this kid wants to make it to his 6th birthday and still have a career, he'd better learn how to pick a crayon for each character and STICK WITH IT.

[Game23Addict]

@VirtuesPenumbra its fake you idiot god i swear sum people are so stupid

[IroNoHimitsu]

@Game23Addict Sarcasm FTW

[b0010100b]

"Oh no, no spoilers!" lmao!

[ps3xpert]

Seems legit

[celestina742]

LMFAO...That movie really was Terrible; the story line sucked ass..

[celestina742]

24/7 ONN NEWS NETWORK NOWWWW!!!

[hellorion]

anchor woman is hot, totally nail that

[rania3830]

i saw fast five on a flight recently. and the movie was like a 5 year old wrote. it was that simple.

[SatanicFilmHouse]

Man, this video is total bullshit. "Fast Five" didn't have any screenwriters.

[bullkokills]

Lol that's one of the funniest things I've ever seen! It's 100% fake but the plot is, well, the same lol

[corky064]

"I thought I was done with this!"

[charlieboiy]

hes a 5 year old and already writing movies wtf

[cornsnoggle]

@charlieboiy It's not real, champ.

[MJH1010]

Holy shit! That's Jeremy Clarkson!

[alexbobomb]

@ChameleonLost88 Hurray, for more corny, exaggerated, bromance films!!!!! They are was I like to call Stupid Good!

[ChameleonLost88]

@alexbobomb That's Kinky

[TheBubbypower]

WHAT THE FUCK DUDE

[shigleyre]

This child needs subtitles.

[formerassassin]

EPIC! SARCASM IS EPIC!

[haraldschl]

Entertainment news...What are the adults going to do to this poor virgin mind. At this age promoting violence! He just came out of the womb. We are sick to encourage this kind of behavior

[1RavynSkye]

@haraldschl LOLWUT? You know this is totally fake, right? This isn't a real 'entertainment news' show, and the whole POINT of this was to show that these movies are so simplistic that five year old could write them? There is no child here 'promoting violence'. >.> I'm sure he's never even SEEN the movies he was talking about, and only repeating lines that someone told him to.

[Tubecluck425]

FAKE AND GAY!!!

[PantAELas3]

@Tubecluck425 NO SHIT, SHERLOCK!

[masterofthestoneage9]

@Tubecluck425 you're quite the idiot.

[Dattebayo9000]

"worst player on team enjoying victory celebration more than he is entitled to"

[nrd1995]

UTERUS THWARTED AGAIN BY NEW DRUG 1:20

[cjbos81]

That little boy has the fast and the furious on swole!

[lonkavhobune]

I think this guy is starting to get old for now. They need to hire someone younger to write the next sequels.

[SolidWander]

"Maxim praised for it's 'How to Fuck Fat Chicks' issue." hahahahaaha

[InfiniteCaos]

is this legit?

[hollisterrgurl90]

@InfiniteCaos no. this channel just likes making fun of things.

[ThatGuy02011998]

No spoilers, no spoilers! I lol'd SO HARD!

[russtafari423]

HAHAHAHA

[thenorwall]

ROFL



[Linderman94]

That little boy is so adorable!!!! Reminds me of my little brother.

[Smann54]

Genius.

[98Lubo]

600 NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOO­OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWW­WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW­WW

[Terrystearsatlfc]

and it goes NJJIIK WUAAAH!

[GSDubz]

Tracy Gill does it for me! Yum

[10forRP]

Well how many? About 600

[jerpdafloopydoop]

is this true? hes a really cute little kid :3 awwwwwwwwwww its so cute when he talks :3

[Revolution2pointO]

@jerpdafloopydoop pedo bear alert. jk :) im a cute widdle kid too waannt to taallke tm to em? smiwey faec :)

[Awgez24]

If this wasnt made by onion, I would of beleived it.

[notoncemoreagain]

Really... really really awesome. Hollywood isn't beating dead horses anymore, they are raping them. But Michael Bay should have been the target. Give me a thumbs up if you think the Transformers series is a load of stupid shit, written by a retarded 5 year old.

[KillaTequilla83]

@notoncemoreagain Hey hey hey give five year olds some credit.

[imtheFreshest]

Haha awsome!