Survival Guide: Anaconda Bite

[lilthomashere]

When B came up, i was like, yeahhhhhh, push it further into the mouth (sarcastic)... Wow

[elchippe]

ahy coño.

[TrinityArmy]

E. Chop off it's head

[arriesdavid]

hey! just incase u encounter that. ok its good u know this shit about anacondas so that means this video isn't for u. its for us who doesn't hve the slightest idea in the world about snakes ok??

[Vincent2478]

D: let it bite u, so u can become spiderman

[ragudugie1]

LOL. They call it deadly and fearsome when it's one of the most docile creatures. They only attack when cornered/trapped. Tip on how to survive an anaconda bite: don't mess with the anaconda to the point where it decides to bite you. A python is a different story though. d:

[bongomaster12345]

or cut off its head

[HatesStupidPeople194]

throw fire at it

[XAdiehSugarlessX]

mm all that muscle can make a girl hor-nay ^_-

[saw4650]

CUT HIS HEAD OFF!!!!

[cointhief]

lol this is stupid why would u play with a dangerous animal like that...usually if u leave them alone they leave u alone too

[Merchendize]

I'd just bite back

[hunterb89]

grab a shotgun

[churromio]

Jesus Rivas is a really good guy lol and he is pretty funny too

[14jrlion]

who seen one of these videos and got addicted and is now watching all of them

[iPixahr]

B!!!!

[namesmichaell]

Almost all answers are B

[LauraJoettecj681]

voll_geïl_bÏN_sÜpÊr_DrÂúf_grãD­È_sUcht_mãl_Àúf_gõòglE_nàch:_g­eldeasy_Ês_klÅppt_wÎè_gèschmIË­rt

[Tkav55]

What about an anaconda squeeze.....

[zozogi5ll]

D.pick up a rock and punch her with it till it let go

[nastyboyfu]

D. Bite the anaconda before it bites you.

[DJwarproductions1]

The Answear is always B! I swear liek every one of these videos I watch it is B!

[TheRader101]

Call Chuck Norris. DUH!!!



[gocubs526]

Yesterday I was on Reddit and got a virus. Fuck that site.

[candIejac]

D. Better drink my own piss

[pimpmyridebiznatch]

D. Insert your penis into the Anacondas mouth

[alex123n]

@pimpmyridebiznatch do you know you wil lost it then ? :D

[pittbullbill]

i love snakes

[zaktan415]

These can't kill a Llamaworm.

[Dgamer559]

survival guide for humans who shove a hand up your throat.

A. bite harder

B. dive in the water

C. wish you were a venomous snake

[JuanJoseAtz]

Great! Now i can go to play with anacondas

[Aerbear23]

but what if it bites your leg? or arm? or butt?

[AnimesAreCool123]

@Aerbear23 Um idk shoot it?

[SkunkCommand]

now i know how to survive an anaconda bite

[NiSH415]

THE PEOPLE WHO CATCH EM ARE SAVAGE YO

[benjimypal21]

eat! eat! eat!

[KindOfGames]

leave it alone! :( god :(

[darkedge21]

LIke a boss I love how buddy just keeps on doing what he is doing even tho he gushin an bleeding like a fuck

[JenniBitchez12]

Lol I Said Poke It In The Eyes xD

[n1k7873]

D. Ram your fist up its ass!!!

[Amatersaru1]

OR you kill all these horrible creatures so they cant bite you in the first place:) or maybe just dont grope it which ever works for you

[RandomGenericComment]

21 people got bit by an anaconda, pulled their hand out, and went to the hospital to be treated for anaconda venom (anacondas arn't poisonous)

[mattcrack44]

D. stop being a dumbass and leave the snake alone

[TheMusicDude1997]

analconda

[RBAWilcox]

he's wrong the reticulated Python is the largest snake

[DJ1SCY]

Q; Are anacondas poisonous?

[TheFishGuy99]

D. Just leave the snake alone

[iansmelly]

E. Stay at home watching others get bitten by ana fucking condas

[Silverflam5]

I hate it, I won't touch The Snake, Never Never Never

[oldinfant23]

D.Don't go to the Amazon Forest

[riddlebrandan]

anaconda=0 humans=1

[justinl198666666]

ANACONDA SQUEEEEEZZZZEEEEEEEEEEEE - NACHO

[SuperDevilsdelight]

Hm push you hand further down its throat...or shoot it with you AK47 what would chuck norris do..

[hima91119]

WHO IN THE WORLD WOULD GET AN ANACONDA BITE ?? !!

[Kyuubi1161]

neouch. that must of hurt. serves them right for trying to catch it though!

[mrjasXD]

0:35 large wound ouch!!

[omeedtheking]

deepah

[dhsjango]

...and now you die from putting a fresh wound in that water and parasites killing you...

[mjcrow36]

Sometimes you get what you ask for.

[Juno36]

Haha, when he got his finger out, the anaconda was like "FFFFUUUUUUUU-!"

[gstring000]

E. ejaculate everywhere

[Falloutman216]

D. Don't go looking for Anacondas.

[calvinandhobbes730]

D. bite it back and squeeze it

[2ndAgbala]

dont go grabbing an anaconda and it wont bite you!

[wilmslowforlife]

sooo 20 ppl wanna die?

[guitarist4196]

glad i watched this...

[ohnoitsho]

what do you you do when its crushing you...

[Cherryxlipgloss]

I KNEW IT WAS B ! :D

&& I was just guessinn too .

AS IF I would mess with an anaconda. Only a retard would.

[theoozaruking]

D. stay the fuck home.

[fearingpredators]

world's second longest and the heaviest snake

[musicpysco]

urn what if it bites your leg you aint gonna shuve that down its throet!?

[hackynoo]

just don't bee there fooooollllll!!!!

[hackynoo]

OMG ... fail, so flippin; fail!

[ericmlowe]

Not a problem for me! because I'm not going anywhere near an anaconda or any other snake. BTW thats what his ass gets gets for even touching that damn thing

[patriciaviloria08]

The best answer: E. Never catch an anaconda without a machine gun or chainsaw :)

[samauripizzacats101]

if an anaconda ever started to wrap itself around me i'd hope all my urine and girlish screams would make it go away. I'd rather face a lion than one of these bastards

[winnipegdiver]

Still the best way to survive is to stay out of there water

[superladygagalover1]

D. once you get ur finger out push explosives deeper in its mouth

[superladygagalover1]

G. choke da life outta dat thing

[Bludipz]

F. shot the anaconda with a double barrel.

[jakec916]

Let me clarify this video... This is how you survive an anaconda bite with more than 5 full grown men lol. When you are by yourself... you can kiss your ass goodbye.

[thrall164]

E.Make the Anaconda a vegetarian.

[groovyman11]

Why not just run a whole lot? You know we all have something called Adrenaline..

[Madwomann]

If hungry anacondas like to swallow things, I don't think pushing yourself further will do the trick. Much less if you're alone and got no help.

[supamarkzyxe]

Infinite in 1 survival guide = run.

[AhChooROFLOL]

What if it bites your leg? What are we suppose to do?

[AhChooROFLOL]

What if it bites your leg?

[supamarkzyxe]

@AhChooROFLOL your dead.

[frecklesbrown300]

ofer it your little sister

[iamdooingyermom]

I CHOOSE :POKE IT IN THE EYES.  LOLOLOLOL

[StRiPeS117]

id be like snake meet boot

[NoOdL3z18]

@StRiPeS117 I'd be like snake meet knife

[DrShakalu619]

put ur arm further down its throat and itll let go its like a gag reflex

[Ultimategrid]

I don't like what they did to it's lip.

[Aabay234]

D. Grab a machete. You know what to do.

[YargDisease]

@Aabay234 How about dont get into it with a snake in the wild? But no your idea of destroying an amazing animal...that's a good one asshole.

I hope You die by one of these beasts, and as that giant serpent squeezes your last breath out of you and you feel yourself slipping away you remember posting that dumbass comment. fuck you.

[Aabay234]

@YargDisease Now YargDisease was that was necessary comment? I love snakes too but not if someones being attacked by one. A joke needs to be present in everyones life at some point in time, you know? I care about human beings just as much. Now time for hugs! Or will there be more hatred? I'll let you decide.

[benx2k7rs]

poke it in the eyes.

[skat3b0ard1ng]

E. Chop his damn head off?

[Breewilly]

@skat3b0ard1ng

lol! I know that's right!

[Nacob07]

TEEHEE. HERPEtologist.

[miasecretbutterfly]

reminds me of when my costal carpet/rock pythons attacked me crazy times I'll stick to my brazillian rainbow boas ty cheers

[batmanboyman]

D: Chop him with your machete

[georgewashington92]

is bites you..machete

[LastFatality09]

i would actually poke the anaconda in the eyes just for fun

[prostabaka]

D is you bite anaconda :)

[11viewer77]

Yes, bite this idiot !

[abbababbaabba]

how to survive: if you are walking in the jungle and you 'll see an anaconda, DON'T FUCKING TRY TO PICK IT UP

[Discipleofbabylon]

THE biggest and probably the most dangerous. just as well they arent poisonous. NO ONE would even think about going near one if they were, I certainly would'nt and the constriction is enough for me to stay away from one

[JimboSlice114]

i live in NY where the fuck would an anaconda bit me?

[dmanewas]

@JimboSlice114 in a pet store

[iuriSalvador]

I have one more effective tip.. Stay away from their habitat.

[Mellanmj0lk]

''push the fingers deeper into its mouth.. and thats how you survive'' eehh.. ok? i got that part right but whats next after you pushed the finger deeper?

[Auriansmule]

People who say to just kill it wouldn't stand a chance...

[JcHizmeng]

@Auriansmule idk meng i understand killin is easy but, i wouldnt stand there and look at it admiring how pretty it is, I'm just sayin alot of pple say just kill it and some people i think could.

[Assasins30Media]

i choose

E. Get RPG and blow it up :D

[bigpoopize]

@Assasins30Media waste of money 4 1 snake

[Assasins30Media]

@bigpoopize

wtf noone paid for it ...

[MissZwinkyHelp]

First of all why in the hellovit would someone MESS WITH AN ANDACONDA

[Tworandomkidspro]

How to survive a Andaconda Attck: DONT F***IN SCREW QITH IT!

[eveplayer12]

GTFO

[twz87]

take out your huge knife, chop its head off, go have dinner. "Kids! Sausage for dinner!"

[NwFrnkCty]

haha i love this guide, its like, yeah normally when u pick an anaconda, u must do this and this.. hahahhahahah

[LandosMomma]

This is the 1,894,034,617th reason that I will never swim in any river in South America.

[lesterclaypool1]

@LandosMomma

The Candiru being, of course, reason number 1.

At least you can, usually, see an anaconda coming whereas a candiru would be up your pee hole before you even realized it was there.

[81pluto]

Anacondas are not the largest snake in the world and do not have fangs.

[JencyRose21]

What are you? A scientist? To be in this swamp?

D: Don't go into the swamp.

[Chudakov77]

GO FOR THE EYES BOO, GO FOR THE EYES!!!!

[verakoval12]

do not put your finger near the mouth and do not step on it !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[SNAKEKIDD18]

okay it bit him on the finger with four guys around the boa. WTF do u do when its only you and it bites your neck where the hell is that survival guide?

[yasin579]

a: wrong

b: wrong

c: wrong

d) get a knife and cut its head of: wrong

e: make sure you have a knife and then cut its head off: right!

[DoomMaster307]

I got a better way of surviving it.

Dont go neer it dumass >:/

[DoomMaster307]

I got a better way of surviving it.

Dont go neer it dumass >:/

[DirgesMusic]

Nice job spashing your hand in the Dirty fucking murk swamp.Lets see how many infections you get!.

[manipulators2007]

Never mind the bite beware of the coil :-)

[wildboy789789]

... all day ive looked up zombie paracites, emporer scorpions and giant millipedes... then i got to anacondas and by the time i was done watching this video i realized how awesome humans are... in the wild the snake can eat a 40lbs rodent... but it bit the human and 2 other humans helped the 1 human by just prying the jaws of the snake open with superior strength... not to mention these humans arnt even the most advanced (technologically)

[WestheLegend]

stupid fucker almost deserves it...wouldn't catch my ass sloshin around the jungle like that...shit.

[kartie64]

POKE IT IN THE EYES! D=

[TheCoolpara]

Why didn't he just smash the anaconda on a rock? with its head ...

[acarr1998]

The first thing you do is pray ....than do what you got to do. Who would want to place themselves in that type of situation.

[superguitarnoob]

i like pizza :D

[SyndicateCaramel]

@superguitarnoob

same here what do you got i got cheese and peperoni

[superguitarnoob]

@SyndicateCaramel iiiii love........onion with cheese peperoni and milk :D

[groovyman11]

@superguitarnoob Lol It' funny because I just had pizza

[wewe1974]

@superguitarnoob me to:D

[DevinsZoo]

Sorry national geographic but they arent the largest.

[yuilis40]

@DevinsZoo they are the largest but not the longest

[DevinsZoo]

@yuilis40 True, but some people watching this wont know that and will think that they are the longest. Did you think about that?

[VanbaniLL]

i wont choose a,b or c i would cut the head off and take my hand out slowly :P

[Liomessirox123]

@VanbaniLL

NationalGeographic you just got pwned! :P Hahaha! Nice one VanbaniLL!

[breakdancer637]

dude maybe you shouldn't be wrestling the largest snake in the world dude... just leave it alone haha its a brilliant idea

[breakdancer637]

oh and what if your not with like 3 other homies haha

[bongioviboy123]

well.. what you keep it in the fucking thing forever?

[goatninja148]

whats up with the narater

[cool2thetouch]

C. Poke the snake in the eye!!!

[azx123d456]

monkeys are so dumb

[lck79]

i will choose D: head off with a machete!

[Vujicicqq]

Anaconda is my favourite Viper :)

[Varimedes]

viper? :S

[Vujicicqq]

yes Anaconda is family Viper

[Varimedes]

Anacondas actually belong to the boa family. The Viper family consists of only venomous snakes. Rattlesnakes and Adders are examples of vipers.

[DRiPPz6800]

the guy had help

not fair

[oinkers53]

ok, so if you are gonna piss of an anacoda, better bring a few friends along to help you get free.

[Shadowsghost]

there's no poison

[SuperMrChameleon]

@diablecita I dont believe they are.

[leitopk4life]

whats funny is that he washes off the blood on the water.......

[ronaldinho355]

@leitopk4life and whats wrong with that.?

[leitopk4life]

@ronaldinho355 man is the fuckin jungle the water is full of parasites and bacteria unless you are native your body cant fight them

[Ahmed2007may]

or just stop harassing Anacondas to start with.

[HLGShanDai]

Mmm... I imagine from the way the teeth are curved, it is similar to a fishing hook - that shit fucking hurts!!!

[leitopk4life]

@HLGShanDai hell yea